Hmmmmm...
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
WRONG OR RIGHT
Pls help me reason this matter to see if I did wrong or not. I had a fall out with a guy I was supposed to marry. We now see each other as exes but we still talk cos of family and stuff we still have with each other.
This guy and I were an item before we met this mutual friend (a babe). She had her intro,uploaded pics on WhatsApp, IG ( my ex, I and other mutual friends posted her pics separately cos we were happy for her). One of my friends even told me she saw the intro pics I uploaded on my status on BellaNaija. She uploaded her wedding IV with the venue censored and she told us Asoebi will soon be out.
Two months ago, she told me and some people that her guy started developing cold feet, hence the wedding was called off. I was down and was there for her cos when I had my own issue, she was also there for me.
One day, she sent m some chat of my ex asking her about Asoebi and venue of the wedding. She got angry and said she was going to block him from seeing her status cos he uses that opportunity to chat her up. I told her not to do so and reminded her of how much the guy cherishes their friendship to the extent that he used her as a character model for me.
She said she's always nice to the guys that treat her friends right cos right now, she doesn't send him anymore. I told her that me and d ex aren't enemies.
Days later, she told me he still disturbs her about the venue and I saw how uncomfortable she was. Few weeks ago, during a convo with my ex, I told him to stop asking her questions about the wedding. He was remorseful and felt bad as he told me the babe would think he knew about it yet was asking questions.
The next morning, he did a friendship check up on her. She sent me the chat cos she was surprised with the change. I didn't tell her I spoke with him. 2 days ago, one talk led 2 another and I informed her. Na so babe vexs o saying it wasn't in my place to inform him about the cancelled wedding and that there was other ways I could have discarded him if he was asking me questions.
I told her I thought I was helping her cos she felt irritated anytime he asked her wedding-related questions. She vexed o and said the guy and her ex are in the same bad book of hers and she doesn't want to indulge dem.
She said she didn't inform my ex of her wedding and I asked her how he got the IV ( she ignored this), why he uploaded her intro pics which she acknowledged and why she talked to me about him disturbing her with questions. She was like will I know if she didn't tell me and I said I would have known cos honestly my ex would have told me or asked me about the venue and asoebi.
I reminded her that I and the guy still talk despite our differences. She was hurt and kept on going about how it wasn't in my place to tell him and that it would have been different if me and the guy were still together. She said people will still disturb her with questions till next year bla bla bla. I apologized and stopped responding cos I was also angry. I honestly didn't like how harsh she sounded but I didn't let out my anger.
I was angry cos she knows i don't talk people's talk. I felt she should understand I was helping her get the guy off her back. She also knows I don't lie unlike some of her friends she cherishes so much but do package lies for her. Pls where was I wrong?
*Well next time mind your business...It is good you apologised cos i think she is in a healing stage and just does not want to explain to anyone or share any info,it was really not in your place to help her spread it.......Why are bad mouthing her other friends?na wah for you oh.....
Poster pity her, she’s still hurting so ahu ka na afu ya ufu.
ReplyDeleteBtw you did nothing wrong
Gbam @ Fan. Poster did nothing wrong but the lady is still very much on the edge and emotional. You getting offended is something you can do without for now and cut her some slacks. I hope she gets over the trying time soon. It's not easy.
DeleteThe babe is sill hurting
DeleteForgive her biko
Fascinating and it be nice you lock up or shush up the next time this kinda ish happens
ReplyDeleteYour friend is still hurting from her cancelled marriage and needs time to mourn her loss.
ReplyDeleteBut Really, Women are quite complex. Things that shouldn't be a problem becomes problems.
YOu have to re-evaluate your friendships/values/commitments and above all make the right choice of spiritual identity. Why is it that both of you get to "near marriage" and have breakups? Please take your relationship with Christ seriously, if you have one. And if you don't have one, why not?
Ha! These are the kind of comments that will push them to start believing something is truly wrong with them then start hopping from one deliverance house to the next spiritual house for "solution".
DeletePlease there is absolutely nothing wrong with having broken relationships/engagements. Some of us kissed quite a few frogs b4 being blessed with our prince charming. Look around you and you will see so many reasons some men develop cold feet. The women too also call off engagements when they find they are not going to be happy eventually. Meanwhile it's not all relationship that must end in marriage. You can have a good relationship with Christ and still have a broken relationship resulting from either side. Christ never promised you a perfect hitch free life. He said pick up your cross and follow me.
@Saphire
DeleteThanks for your opinion without insults. Yes, humans make mistakes and that is why we are humans. It is better to have a broken relationship than broken marriage. I did not mention any "spiritual or deliverance house," did I? I only advised her to take her relationship with Christ seriously or establish one if she does not have one. If you have taken time to read my comments here, I do not subscribe to hopping to any house for deliverance. I advocate for people establishing a relationship with Christ by themselves. For he said that whosoever seeks him will find him if she seeks with all her heart. Cheers.
This is so insensitive! So you are the only one that has never had relationship issues ba? How old are you actually? 18 or less? I really wonder,because your comments on this blog are rather childish and baseless. Hmmm,na wa sha.
DeletePoster ignore this person's comment. Your friend is obviously still hurting. Don't be too hard on her. Don't let this affect your relationship with her. Give her time.
Akuko umuazi, he said she said 🙄, una get time abeg, can never be me.
ReplyDeleteHmmmmmm.........is she the only girlfriend you have in this world. Nne give her some space, she will calm down
ReplyDeleteWhy are you crying more than the bereaved? Her wedding was called off and you are telling tales (by moonlight?)
ReplyDeleteMy feminine intuition tells me that this your 'ex" and your friend will soon be "an item." Hmm, expect "weeding" invitation any moment for now. "Character model"🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄
My dear it's happening very very soon I tell u
DeleteDon't know why this same thought passed through my mind........
DeleteI think naming ceremony will come even before that "weeding" iv 😜😜😜😜
DeleteHmmm...very possible.
Delete@Saphire
DeleteEither "possible" or "not possible"
There is NO "it is very..."
See how you open mouth waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.
ReplyDeleteDidn’t it occur to you that if she wanted him to know about the cancellation should have done that when he was asking about the wedding venue. Apologies properly and next time think properly before you discuss others.
Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.
Poster you did nothing wrong. I just think your friend is still in the healing stage so right now, she can pour her frustration on anyone. It's not you, it's her...time will heal her
ReplyDeleteShe’s probably still hurt from the breakup that’s why she’s that angry.
ReplyDeleteYou didn’t do anything wrong from my own perspective but from now going forward, mind your business and let her be.
Mstchwwwww * bends down to count the grains of sand on the floor*
ReplyDeleteAll of una go dey alright.
ReplyDeleteYou did nothing wrong in my opinion. Bit its ok you apologised.
Still trying to understand this Chronicle. All I saw was my ex the ex and her ex.
ReplyDeleteAbeg let sleeping dogs lie. You hear?
Nna na wa
DeleteWhat exactly did the poster do here? I don't see anything wrong. Besides she was talking to just anyone but to her ex who she is still in touch with. Dear, poster pls let your friend be. Give her space. Our perception to life is different.
ReplyDeleteI tire o. I was wondering whether we read the same chronicle.
DeleteBabe is still hurting. Don't let it get to you too much.
ReplyDeleteForgive her and let it slide cos you did nothing wrong. If she didn't want others to know, she would have told you to keep it to yourself, especially since she was always complaining of your ex always asking her..
I don't think you did anything wrong and the ex guy probably didn't have anything bad in mind when he asked her. You were wise to apologize, she is obviously hurting that the wedding she announced to the world didn't hold as planned. Face your front and relate with her with caution in future.
ReplyDeletePS: This is a downside to those that post every detail of their lives on social media, managing fallouts of breakups and other advertised issues are always much more embarrassing. Only my business handle is regularly updated on SM.
So true.
DeleteIt can be so embarrassing and humiliating, after the posting on social media.
You did not wrong. She is in denial.
Give her space, she will heal.
Gosh is good to be back, my app login me out for few days now..haven't been able to comment.
ReplyDeleteAbeg poster just face your front the deed has been done, don't beat yourself too much. Your friend will surely come around, guess she's hurting.
I really don't think the poster did anything wrong.
ReplyDeleteAll this wahala could have been avoided if the mutual friend just told the guy that the wedding had been cancelled. She was able to tell the poster and others, so why not the guy too? What was the purpose of screenshoting her convo with the guy and sending it to the poster? What did she expect the poster to do? And were the threats of blocking even necessary?
If you choose to post pix of your introduction; wedding invitation and asoebi publically on your WhatsApp and IG, then you should be ready to answer any questions regarding them, publically too!
Gbam, iji yá👌!!
DeleteThe screenshots is just an ego boost..she's letting the poster know that Mr.ex is interested in me and my affairs oh.. just in case something happens between them tomorrow there'll be proof that she didn't snatch, he pursued her lol. But the ex sef, all these amebo guys, can't he stay on his lane and face his front? If you don't completely invite me to an event, there's no way I'm asking for venue. If venue wasn't given to you, it means you're not invited lol.
DeleteAbeg Miss E..Plenty kisses for you Jare! You reason am well!!
DeleteI don't where you people get the time for all this pettiness, na wa, she said, he said, I said, them said..... Akuku umuaka
ReplyDeletePoster, you did nothing wrong. I guess you and you friend are still quite young because this should not be an issue much less a Chronicle.
ReplyDeleteOne thing though, YOUR EX SHOULD NOT HAVE ASKED YOUR FRIEND for Asoebi and wedding venue. He should have rather asked you.
Give your friend some space for now.
Both poster and her ex are mutual friends with the babe, so the ex is actually within his rights to ask her for venue. They both became her friend at the same time, not like he got to know her through the poster. (From what I understand in the story)
DeleteWhy has she not announced that the wedding has been called off? I don't understand the secrecy. If she doesn't want anyone asking her about wedding related stuff,she should send a general message or something
ReplyDeleteSeems you guys are all still young..everyone jumping from one place to the next.and by the way I can understand u visiting her and stuff to console her but wats the meaning of your ex keeping on asking her where the venue is and when you finally told him the reason, he still carried his big behind to her house.Abi he won chook leg?
ReplyDeletePoster give your friend some time to get over her breakup you will see that things will fall in place.
ReplyDeleteShe is in her healing process and it's not easy to go through that process. You need a strong heart before you can come out of that process.
This mats tie gele,but I understand her anger,if a person is still hurting or not yet ready to let d world into an issue,they r usually sensitive about such issues.
ReplyDeleteYou did nothing wrong, since you are all mutual friends why did she hide it from your ex?
ReplyDeletei was angry reading this chronicle...meaningles anger. that is why i loe the white people. wedding has been called off, they will send messages to all of you and some will return gifts sef
ReplyDelete