Hmmmmmmm na wah.....
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
CONFUSING SITUATION
Good day.....
I'm a girl of 25 and I'm in HND 2 .
I'm dating a guy of 26 but you will think he's older , we are both AS but we love each other so much . I have told him before that we can never get married that I'm just enjoying the moment until I meet someone better .
We have been dating for 7 months now.
I have another guy I was dating before I met my current bf , I have know him for 11 months now , he is 29 , he is from my town and he is a business man and he Stays in another state . He stopped calling like he use to do , I complained a lot about it but he will plead with me that he his busy in the shop .
I have another guy I was dating before I met my current bf , I have know him for 11 months now , he is 29 , he is from my town and he is a business man and he Stays in another state . He stopped calling like he use to do , I complained a lot about it but he will plead with me that he his busy in the shop .
He has visited me in school before ,no s#x .
He came to my school recently and told me he would like to marry me , I told him he was not serious that I have a bf now but that the guy was AS , he was happy and told me ,there is chance for him .
He came to my school recently and told me he would like to marry me , I told him he was not serious that I have a bf now but that the guy was AS , he was happy and told me ,there is chance for him .
He asked for s#x just once and I refused and he didn't ask again . I met him last December and he has invited me over which I turned down during lockdown and he offered to come to my base ,I still refused . We have never had s#x but when I ask him for something , he gives me and calls now .
My current bf is everything I want in a man ,he is not from my town , his heart is so pure , I don't need to ask for things before I get them .we are having s#x.
he is planning on leaving the country,he tired twice with Canada but he was not granted , he has spent a lot of money on it . He told me my name was written as spouse ( gf) so that I can easily visit , I don't know how true is that , he told me there must be solution in Canada for us not to have ss kids .
I don't want to waste my time with anybody but I love my current bf and his family . I like the second guy and I know if I give him another chance , I might fall for him .
Here is the issue , I will be going back to my base after my exams and my current bf stays in the Same state as me .
I hate lies , the other guy has started calling and I don't want my current bf to find out .
My gf told me not to tell my current bf about the second guy ,that since I'm not having s#x with the second guy , it's not cheating .
Please help me, my current bf has helped me alot , he wants to build me and I know he loves me but I don't want sick children . What if I leave my current bf for the second guy and he doesn't treat me like my current bf 😭😭😭
Or what if he is not real ? What if he has a gf in his state ?
Hmmmmm.this is sad but i dont care how you do it...END THAT RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR CURRENT BOYFRIEND NOW!!!!
Or what if he is not real ? What if he has a gf in his state ?
Hmmmmm.this is sad but i dont care how you do it...END THAT RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR CURRENT BOYFRIEND NOW!!!!
You are setting up yourself for a serious heartbreak in the future.
You dont need to date or marry the second guy,nah by force?Just get yourself out of the relationship with the first guy.....
My dear...hang on for a third. First n second guys are not yours.
ReplyDeleteGoing to canada with the hope that they will help u guys not to have as kids is a risk not worth taking. By the time shit gets real, love will fly out of the window.
How can someone lie to you that he made a Visa Application and put your name as spouse (gf) on the application 🙄🥴😏; thats a big lie 🤭. Back to the main story, forget about the AS guy if you can. Not being disrespectful to anyone with AS or SS as genotype but you don't want to bring children into the world and they are always in pain and you feel the guilt for the rest of your life. You can always do CVS abroad, don't know if it's done in Nigeria but just have it at the back of your mind that after going through pregnancy for 3 months, you have CVS and each time it's SS you have to terminate the pregnancy. Do you want to put yourself through all of that?
DeleteWishing you all the best.
Poster, Canada application Imm 1294 or what ever number it is, the family one, there is no position for gf, chaiiiiiiii like @ Anno 15*53 said, google the application and check, is either you are a spouse which he have to summit court wedding certificate or you are his sister and he will need to add your birth certificate to proof that. So that your bf lie no ripe at allllllll.
DeleteDid you not read a story here, exactly your case, the couple went to Canada, had about 4 kids, they kept dieing, the man convinced his wife to come back to 9ja after she did, Oga remarried, two kids that madam came back with later died, las las the woman lost everything family, career, wealth and herself.
Pls leave the guy of AS guy, the love u have for him now will not be enough when your children will start dieing or when you start seeing your children in pain
Whenever sex is in a relationship, your judgement is clouded especially if it's good. My dear lady, stop having pre marital sex and stay away from your AS boyfriend. Think with your head please. About the second man, he mustn't be the one, you are still young, dont fall into the wrong hands. Rededicate your life to God and let him guide your path.
ReplyDeletePoster concentrate on your studies biko. Leave both alone
DeletePoster abeg you don't need all these unnecessary drama..If you don't feel right with him why not leave him and move with someone you love...You think it is easy with AS and AS marrying themselves...Do yourself better and save yourself from future tears when you are in the hospital because of your kids then you will know that love is not enough..You better give yourself sense..
ReplyDeleteYou are "having sex with him, AS?" That goes even against your innate belief that made you confused and write this chronicles, doesn't it? You 'hate lies" and are living a lie; dating two people and lying to the one you claim you love?
ReplyDeleteIt appears that what is blinding your eyes is the fornication. You have to let go of this "addiction" and be able to see; see the one calling you to repentance; Jesus and who alone can open your eyes to see whom your husband is. You'd see the one that is "asking you to marry him" but asking for sex already; that's not love for whom you are but for the immediate fleshly gratification he will obtain from you; don't you see?
When you embrace your creator, you will have peace and the confusion will go.
At your age, you are still allowing sex to turn/screw your head. Common face your studies and stop day dreaming. Small talk about Canada, you just melted.
DeletePoster please stop seeing the two men. The guy from your state doesn't seem serious, no go enter 2nd chance.
ReplyDeleteAs for your current bf,It is hard to turn down someone you love because of AS issue, it happened to me, had a boyfriend who was really good and ticked almost all my boxes, but we are both AS we had to let go. You will be alright.
Look to the future your God-sent will come. Pray about these things too.
Please, ladies, dating is not an "enjoying the moment" piece of adventure. It is not having sex.
ReplyDeleteDating is a time you need to asses if you can get along to marriage with the character in question.
Now, you have something else bothering you and that is the genotype, why are you still sticking on? Supposing you get pregnant and have an SS child at the moment? Or will you again go ahead to make another "mistake" by killing a child?
Please move on if you aren't ready to marry him.
WHEN A SICK CHILD IS IN THE PICTURE HE WILL NOT TREAT YOUR RIGHT
ReplyDeleteGOOGLE STORIES OF SS OFFSPRINGS
TERRIBLE
LEAVE HIM PLEASE
AND STOP HAVING PREMARITAL SEX
Poster you are SCUM. You are more "scummer" than men scum.
ReplyDeleteGuys you see why I said once anyone that is sexually active comes up with celibate talk, he/she has a hidden agenda.
You claim you are not cheating but
Q
1. You are flirting with him
2. Collecting his money
3. Denying him sex
4. Having sex with your main "bf".
Only you one get 4sins.
And the guy eriri eri will be see you as a good girl that is celibate, hmmmm! Alu mèè.
Scum bag, you don't even have shame
Which type of mumu love is this?see u will not have time for love when u give birth to SS.I am AS ,I will never marry an AS never.You people will never learn
ReplyDeleteUhmm it is not so easy to us to judge and see the future
ReplyDeleteI believe you're of a decision making age to know what is good for you and what will give you peace in the nearest future.
ReplyDeletePlease, end the relationship with your current boyfriend. The stress of having SS children is too overwhelming and you don't want to be burying your kids one after the other. Please, give that relationship a final rest.
Not another AS chronicle again, arghhhhh!
ReplyDeleteWhy are some of you AS peeps so stubborn, why why? Please nne I know it is hard but leave your current boy friend inugo?🤗🤗
As in ehhhh very stubborn.
DeleteI don't even know what to say that hasn't been said before...
Hmmmmm. This one is tough sha oooo.
ReplyDeleteBut it is only in Nigeria that AS people are afraid to get married. Most of them discuss these things and either decide never to have kids, adopt kids or us anonymous donor IVF.
I get that the both of you can't be together but it's very sad.
It's like life played you 1 - 0 right from birth.
My advice is that you both should decide your birthing options since that's the only hindrance and if you can't compromise leave the relationship while you can still think.
Don't allow Canada to be loud your sense of judgement. Sickle cell disease is not Childs play. Please stop deceiving your 29 years old business man boyfriend let him go he deserves pure genuine love and happiness.
ReplyDeletePoster dear..stop engaging in premarital sex and stop leading both men on! The episodes that comes with having an SS child can only be imagined,trust me you don't wanna experience it.. so it's better you break up with him now!
ReplyDeleteCheating doesn't mean it has to be sex alone,there are so many other ways people cheat on their partners just like you're doing,don't let your friend lead you astray with that lies
My advice to u dear is just to let go your present boyfriend, it's better now than later which will be done base on fostration and counter accusations because of the situation you may find your self at that particular point in time. I have a male friend that took risk to marry is girlfriend which both of them happen to be as-as but there were very lucky to give birth to a child which happen to be free and he decided not to have additional baby in other to avoid giving birth to a carrier, but is a big risk which may not happen like that to mr B.
ReplyDeletemy own issue is not even the genotype cos i have seen testimonies of people receiving their healing from SS to AA. so if you both have faith and are ready to wait on God fine....my issue is why still hang on to a relationship you already know you do not want to marry the guy? if you feel you cant marry him for his genotype then end the relationship. what if you get pregnant? dont complicate issues...as for the guy relocating, you can only be sure of how he feels by his actions after he finally gets the visa...are you ready to wait or endure all the drama that might come if he travels and you are not able to immediately? is your OWN dream truly to live abroad? dating is not only about sex. young people should learn to also focus on important matters while dating so they can make informed decisions. i personally cant double date because i hate drama and cant keep up with lies. anything that makes me uncomfortable i run from..
ReplyDeleteSickle cell no be sere sere oh, please tread with caution and i'm sure you are old enough to make a decision
ReplyDeletehis heart is so pure , I don't need to ask for things before I get them .we are having s#x. I bet the sex is good and you are carried away with the size of penis . His generosity is blocking your brains. Money and sex can make most of you forget your essence.
ReplyDeletehe is planning on leaving the country...abroad and fish brain girls. Once they hear abroad it will twist their imaginations and whatever decency they have flies through the window.
I hate lies , the other guy has started calling and I don't want my current bf to find out... You are living a lie like most girls and you claim to hate lies. Cheating the boyfriend you "love" . You are collecting money and gifts from the other guy. Eventually you are going to start having sex with him. You may end up getting pregnant for one them.
Yes, there were generalisations in the above. Isn't this what the ladies here do everyday . No apologies.
Dear poster,please stop having premarital sex,please calm down,give yourself a break and build yourself by yourself, you dont need any man to build you, ask God for direction.
ReplyDeleteA man talked to you about marriage and you disclosed your relationship with another guy to him, you shouldn't have done that.
ReplyDeleteDon't wait to grow more deeper in love with your AS guy before you let go. Move on now, you can still be friends but don't think of getting married to him tomorrow to avoid more Chronicles.
Mboko,
ReplyDeleteThere's nothing like love in any relationship that will get to marriage in AS and AS
Please end this relationship now ooo
Well you can actually marry the AS guy but you'll have to conduct genotype test on the baby while in the womb around 11 weeks. But the test is expensive.the test is done in sickle cell foundation.
ReplyDeleteOne of the first questions I asked my husband when we just met and I was falling for him was his genotype.I am an AS and having lost close cousins that were sicklers;the whole pain and money spent;I dont wish it upon my worst enemy;let alone my offspring.
ReplyDeletePlease breakup with ur current BF NOW!! Before it gets too late.Road no dey there and when the shit gets real,believe me heartache and pain will replace the "love" u feel now.
If u dont like the second guy enough for marriage;pls do the needful and let him go.U mustn't break up with one and jump to the next available dude.Being single till the right one comes along is not a crime.
And about wondering if u will get the same kind of love from another guy;no fear,there are so many fishes in the river.
I CAN BET THAT GF OF YOURS WILL (IF NOT ALREADY TOLD) TELL YOUR BF EVERYTHING AND EVEN ADD SOME SPICE.
ReplyDeleteYES I'M SHOUTING.
IF YOU DON'T TAKE ANYTHING AWAY FROM THIS POST, NEVER EVER SHARE SUCH SECRETS WITH ANY FRIEND (M or F) AGAIN.
So, if I were you, I'd stylish chip in boyfriend 2's matter to boyfriend 1. Just wait for an opportunity and chip it in casually. Don't make a big deal of it. This is just so that boyfriend 1 won't see you as a lying bitch. Don't tell him everything, just casually tell him someone is asking you for a serious relationship but you haven't considered them.
Hope you're using protection?
Now that the going is smooth your bf is saying in Canada there will be solution for you both not to have an ss children.
ReplyDeleteWhen the chips will be down he will not be there to fight with you, you alone will be in and out of the hospital, he will be cheating with different girls.
You better shine your eyes now that the place is bright. Love with your head.