STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
MOTHER IN LAW FROM HELL....
I just feel like venting my anger out on here before I do it the other way round.
I'm a new mom who has been living with her mother in law for few months now because hubby is not around and I can't live alone with newborn says hubby. But I prefer living alone with my family around than staying with my Mil from hell. She's so frustrating and complain about everything I do.
If am boiling water to bath, she will stylishly go behind me to off the gas, she doesn't eat salt but I like it, she doesn't allow me to make my meal except what she cooks but she is a terrible cook, she said before I dress my baby I should first come and show her for approval and anytime I sing any song, she says am using it to abuse her.
I feel so drained by her attitude.
* ah ah what is all this?this is not nice at all and stuff like this leads to serious postnatal depression..please remove yourself from her house if you have an option
Pretty sad situation but this story sounds grossly incomplete
ReplyDeleteAnon, u are right
DeleteTake permission to dress baby kwa? Fix it Jesus I can’t deal
DeleteAnon 15:02...some stories sounds too good to be true..wait till you hear my story and that of my MIL...you will not believe any damn thing I say cos its just unimaginable...infact,the whole village believes I do jazz because of her stories..she has sold me 10 10kobo.I don't live with her again.I have moved on with her son.I have added flesh,hubby has added too...I am very very strong now..Nothing shakes me but sometimes I think back and just wonder why.The writer just went straight to the point to save us time.Pray not to meet that MIL that will hate your personality.
DeleteChronicle poster form sick and request you wanna go spend some time with your momma or just form sick and remain indoor 24/7. My mother in-law is the one currently doing omugwo for me. I always form not feeling fine and stay indoors all day long. She does the little work like bathing baby and cooking while my kidsister does all other households chores. That way there's peace and everyone is happy. If not my in-law has her own skoin skoin and she complains a lot.
DeleteI have been there before and still there, I had to lie I had a training in another state where my mother resides and ran away.
DeleteI don't understand why they are like that true, I am in another country yet she still calls to cause trouble, mehn nah blocking things be that. It's not easy but las las you stoop to conquer.
I have been there too but I left both her and her son and moved on with my life, the thoughts of those days still gives me nightmares, the God I serve gave me beauty for ashes, my new mother in-law is sent from heaven, she loves me and my son from my previous marriage like kilode, leaving that toxic marriage and family is still the best decision I have ever made, I’m grateful to God for a beautiful second chance in marriage
DeleteHubby's aunt that came to do omugwo show me pepper, when I saw that she started stylishly calling her daughters and grandkid over, I had to lie to hubby that it's a tradition in my place that I have to take my child to see my dad....he didn't even argue, na so I travel go see my papa...that woman stressed me o, by 3:30-4am, she would wake me up to boil bathing for baby and I had to ask her if the baby had a party to attend that I had to get up so early to prepare bathing water...I washed her clothes nd cooked that same week I delivered. ...I had to beg my mum to hurriedly come down cos I wasn't myself anymore....post natal depression is real ooo
DeletePoster are you sure as in surest?
DeleteGodforbid!
ReplyDeleteYour Hubby dictates whether you can live alone with a new born or not? Your decision on what to do is all up to you.
ReplyDelete🚶♀️🚶♀️🚶♀️🚶♀️🚶♀️🚶♀️🚶♀️🚶♀️🚶♀️
So sorry poster. Just try to exercise patient till she go. It's not going to be easy, try to be strong.
ReplyDeleteI think she's living with her Mother in law.
DeletePatience not patient
DeleteThanks for the correction
DeleteFind a way of leaving if you have an option. Or you can say you want to go and greet/visit your people with the new born to escape from your MIL. Biko, I can't deal.
ReplyDeleteHmmmm God help us oh...Why are human beings like this? Please talk to your husband and tell him how her attitude is affecting you..Haa I tire o
ReplyDeleteNot nice now, coupled with the fact you're caring for your child, her grandchild. Is there no way you can go to your parents place or go back home, and allow someone come stay with you? Discuss it with hubby. You do not need this kind of stress abeg.
ReplyDeleteCan't your hubby rent an apartment for you? Nah see finish syndrome the cause this kind of issue.
ReplyDelete@CAndix
DeleteCan't a woman and her husband discourse things like this and agree
on the best option for both of them?
And can't a woman work, earn to contribute to the family and not leave
every burden to the husband?
Maybe she's not working yet.
DeleteAnon 15.21... right now, her comtribution to the family is taking care of their new born. When its time for her to go to work, they need to sit down and sort out childcare!. Its funny how women are expected to take care of the home and children AND go to work!
DeleteGod bless you femilicious. Some men are very stingy and have wicked hearts. You want someone that has put to birth a tender baby not long, to jump and start work. Your type will stress and kill his wife. Where is the love?
DeleteThese are things to discuss before marriage, during courtships.
ReplyDeleteThe problem is that a lot of Nigerian ladies has a bias toward mother in laws that
are so ingrained in them. Nollywood
with Patient Ozokwo (when I used to
watch), isn't making is easier for them either. In their hearts, she is "a witch who hates me and my family"
. You know why It pays to be in Christ?
Your life is patterned by the Jesus
teachings and not be stereotypes.
Because the believer has experienced the love of God
in the midst of her sins, she is better
equipped with the Love of God to overcome all perceived or real maltreatment, because like he stated
in Rom. 12 we pay no one evil for evil... but we do❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
good to they that
hurt us.❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
You didn't read the chronicle
DeleteAnon 15,18,I'm with ANG on this,what the poster is has some bottled anger ahead of her staying with the woman,why tag her MIL from hell?what happened to you overlooking things since you are not living with her forever,the story is incomplete
Deletea lot of Nigerian ladies *have* a bias... not... "has". The word 'ladies' is plural.
DeleteTHE MOTHER IN-LAW WILL NOT TREAT HER OWN DAUGHTER LIKE THIS!
Yes, the love of Christ in a recreated heart helps to overcome OR AVOID❗
ANG haven't you read where the Bible says “as much it depends on you, live at peace with all men?“
"If anyone doesn't accept your peace, let your peace return to you."
MUST SOMEONE DIE IN SILENCE TRYING TO LOVE AND LIVE IN PEACE WITH ANOTHER WHO IS NASTY?❗
Believers in Christ should learn to AVOID those who sow seeds of discord/strife/bitterness and bruise their spirits.
THE BIBLE I READ IS BALANCED.
ANG abeeg leave talk. Some of us dil decided that we're going to love our mil but we later find out our mil doesn't love us . abeeeg it takes two to tango. I'm indifferent about my mil. I can never love her bcos she showed me nothing but hatred when her son brought me home simply bcos I'm IMO and they're Anambra. She wants to start doing eye service now and forming lie lie affection toward me but that ship has far sailed long ago.
DeleteI beg enh there are some mil that no matter how lovingly u treat them they are simply from hell.
DeleteThank you. I opened my heart to my mother-in-law,but found out she wants to be treated like a god. It got to a point she started complaining to hubby about insignificant things,even when I was pregnant and alone she was doing nonsense and told my hubby she wants to pepper me. Wickedness at it's peak. The last one my hubby change am for her and she was shouting so he is supporting his wife. Hubby asked her whose side should he take before,and if her mother-in-law treated her the way she treats me if she would like it. The woman vex off phone. Hubby called his father and bro and told them to talk to their mother if not,he will do what Prince Harry did. Hehehehe. It is well.
Delete@16:28
DeleteI quoted from that Romans 12 -"as much as it depends on you"
But how about when that bias exists from the beginning?
Thanks for the grammatical correction.😊😊😊😊😊
@16:41
DeleteLove your enemies, do good to them who persecute you... Matthew 5:44
What you have just told us is that you do not belong to Christ.
Give your life to Christ biko. 😘😘😘
Anon18.01 yes love your enemy...doesnt mean you should live with them. Its important not to live with someone who hates you. Love yhem from a distance. It is bad for your mental health
DeleteHow did it get to this? Form sickness then tell hubby you wish to visit your family with baby for a day. A day turn into 1week until omugwo is over. Then you back to your own house.
ReplyDelete😁😁😁😁😁😁 exactly what I'm doing. Form sickness and escape abeeeg.
DeleteWhere are your parents? Tell your husband you're going to visit them and stay there!!!
ReplyDeleteThis is why I advise women to have a job or a business before marriage. Why would a working woman who knows she has 2-3months maternity leave or a business woman who has a business to run be staying with MIL?
Honestly i don't understand why most men make their so called better half experience and pass through harsh situations.
ReplyDeleteIf you as a man under any circumstance should leave your wife in a distant place, always make sure you do your best to keep her happy and safe at all cost...
Dressing a baby and showing the baby for approval 😕Jeeezzzz
ReplyDeleteNa wa ooo
DeleteThere's always two sides to a story.. if she complains that she doesn't like salt that means she's hypertensive.. I know please try and accommodate her excesses, I'm sure it will only be for a while.. may God strengthen you
ReplyDeleteIt's your husband you should discuss with. You can't be staying at his mum's place. Go back to your house.
ReplyDeletePostpartum depression is real,just calm down and dont over work yourself,try overlook all she does while you talk to your husband about getting you a place.
ReplyDeleteNever leave decisions about your joy and comfort in people's hand .E be like say you too soft my darling?
ReplyDeleteShe is very soft.
DeleteNo one determines my happiness.
Talk to your hubby nao,abi na dictator you marry ni?
Tell him you wanna go home
aunty please move your things back to your house jare. somebody cannot just try all these nonsense with me. dealing with the stress of a new born and also dealing with the stress of a mother inlaw. abegiii
ReplyDeletePls poster, patience and more patience is what you need right now. This union with his family is for life... so its better to tread carefully. I am guessing that your marriage is still somewhat new. So... in order to have a smooth union, try to focus more on her good sides and relate more to that than her nasty sides... you will be fine dearest ....💗💗
ReplyDeleteThis story is one sided however Poster, please be patient. This too shall pass.
ReplyDeleteDiscuss with your husband and make him see reasons why you should go back home with your baby. Be nice to Mama as you will be a mother in law in the future.
Peace
Can't record any of this her act and send to your hubby?
ReplyDeleteMy exact thoughts!
DeletePoster get evidence.
But why did you agree to marry a man who made you live with his mom/family?
So that the man will tag her evil and want to come between him and his mum, she doesn’t need any evidence, women need to learn to stand up for themselves, tell him his mum is making you uncomfortable and you no longer want to live with her, he should get you your own apartment no matter how small, if he refuses, go back to your family and stay there, happiness and peace of mind is priceless and definitely more important than staying married to an absentee husband 🙄
DeleteExactly @ 17:59, most of our men don't speak for their wives. So, women should stand and speal for themselves, I beg. Your sanity and peace of mind is very important. I would have left such MIL's house since, even without notice self! We ll settle later from afar!
DeleteIt's easy to say 'patience' until you find yourself in this fix with some terrible MILs. You can't please them no matter how hard you try! Or how do you explain a MIL that punches/blows her DIL over Omugwo? I witnessed this with a friend and got stuck to my feet for minutes!
Poster, do what is best for your health's and baby's sake pls.
This one na living in bandage part 3 oh
ReplyDeleteShuo. Abegiiii
Some husbands are the cause of all these nonsense. Na only if your mama no get mouth na im this kind thing fit happen.
If na my mama she for don come carry me comot for that house ASAP.
If you amd your husband have a rented apartment better go there and stay and then beg your mom or available sibling to stay with you.
Poster, just explain all you are going in your mother in-law house to your hubby and move out. You don't need this kind of stress this period.
ReplyDeleteNa wa o I can’t o that’s why people should plan properly see now . I went to stay with one of my auntie when I was pregnant too . Hmmm she said I should always wake up early before my child wakes up . Child in my womb oo
ReplyDeleteI want to hear your MIL's side of the story
ReplyDeleteMy elder sister passed through similar experience and was suffering in silence with her MIL.I remember visiting her then;Even to collect drinking water from the MIL fridge ;u have to take permission and collect the keys.The food aspect was another thing..No room.for second helpings or even cooking what she feels like eating.
ReplyDeleteMy parents just bounded her out of that place and brought her to our family house make we dey manage together.All these MILs from hell..Smh
Thank God for your parents
DeletePoster do these:
ReplyDelete1. Discuss with your husband on getting a mini flat or going back to your parents.
2. Give your mother in-law assignment - give her your baby every morning to care for along with his box of clothes, prepared food, diapers etc. That should keep her busy ALL DAY (with giving approval).
3. Buy a camp gas for your personal cooking in the kitchen.
4. Enroll in a skills acquisition centre/ get a job once your baby is 3 months or 6 months old.
You need to be out of the house at least 4 times in a week to avoid her nagging. She could either be "bored or borish"❗
I can't stand stress or scolding right from my mother's house. I will just AVOID the stressor ASAP.
I wanted to say you should leave her house, but it seems she is in your matrimonial home with you, hmm , this is tricky, but I'll advise that you leave that house for a while, to your parents house FOR YOUR SANITY, if anything happens to you, the world including your husband will move right on. Fake anything to leave the house.
ReplyDeleteThe easiest, if you know your ways are pure towards her, and you treat her right, then get on your knees and pray her out of your house in Jesus Name.
I really dont know where you ladies get these husbands from. It's a shame really
ReplyDeleteHow is the husband at fault. He advised his wife not to live alone with their new born baby. Is there any wrong in that?
DeletePlease read the chronicle again. The Poster did not mention that she has discussed with her husband, and that he supported his mother against his wife.
Read between the lines. The Poster wanted her mother to do the Omugwuo, or she wanted to be with her "family" (the Mil is not her family or a member of her family). Her husband's choice spoilt her plans. That was the beginning of the war.
As a new mother, Poster ordinarily should avoid excessive salt because new mother's as prone to high BP, but if salt is the problem, why don't she just had salt to her own portion? What is the big deal in showing her Mil her baby after dressing her. Her Mil food is horrible. This is a big challenge but with wisdom of let me show you another style of cooking it with even lesser salt may give Poster opportunities to take over the kitchen.
Poster, please try and be happy. It will be over soon. Develop some love for MIL it ease your readjustment. Who knows it may also make her change for good as you want.
Best wishes.
Dear poster, post natal depression is real. Your mother in-laws house is not your husband's house. If you have the means rent your own apartment if not please move to your parents house. My grandmother despised my mom because my mom is from Anambra state and my Dad from Abia. My grandmother extended the hatred to is the children. My mom was good to her but gave her space. She So many years later I got married to someone from Anambra state and the animosity towards me because of my State of origin was out of this world. I maintained cordial relationship and gave them space. I never failed to assist them atleast that's what my mom thought me.
ReplyDeleteGod forbid, leave that house and make yourself happy.
ReplyDeleteWhat Rubbish
Naawao!
ReplyDeleteSome people are really passing through a difficult time.
I sincerely don't even know what to suggest sef.
God I thank thee for my mother in love ooooooh, it's been 7years of peace.
Though there was a time we had a little fraction, we settled immediately my husband wasn't even aware of the incident.
My Victory Dance loading💃💃💃💃💃💃