So what happens to a person who is Divorced (and is not supposed to date again or remarry until the ex is dead) and their ex has moved on and remarried?
Is this ex supposed to sit down and wait for their remarried ex to enjoy their Marriage and die before life goes on?
Which part of the Bible forbids a spouse from remarrying?Is this really what God wants or mans addition to the Bible?Cos i hear the Bible has been rewritten many times and probably had some additions made...#justsaying
Those of you reading this who are divorced and remarried,why didn't you follow the Bible teachings?
Wey dem?...Lets gist!
🍿🍿🍫🍬🍭🍩🥤🥤🥤🥤🎂🍪🍿🍿🍿
ReplyDeleteThis is a very lovely topic , thank you Stella for bringing this here 🍇🍇
Choco sweetie 😘😘
DeleteAll I know is that the word of God is standard and cannot be change to suit anyone. The Bible made it clear that God hates divorce and you're not supposed to divorce your wife except on the ground of adultery and if you eventually divorced her you will both remain single until death. There's no room for remarrying when your first partner is still alive. That's tantamount to adultery. We can argue it till they kingdom comes but it doesn't still change the fact that we can't change the teaching of our Lord Jesus to suit our own selfish interest. It's a curse to add or remove from the Bible.
DeleteI come in peace...
Shalom....
I have no experience in this topic😎
DeleteMy uncle who is divorced refused to marry again. His ex is married.. His response to my mum's pressure and questions was that it was against his belief to remarry.. At 42,no child, no wife and he is adamant about his decision ooo
Delete@AdaBluey, he can adopt children later. He's only following the biblical teaching. He knows remarrying will take him straight to hell.
DeleteNigeria first daughter you nailed it, God bless you.
DeleteThis is exactly why I haven’t rushed into marriage. Isn’t it better to remain single and make heaven than to marry and rush out and not be able to remarry? I really pray and wish that we have misinterpreted the Bible and God actually doesn’t mind but mehn, I can’t shake off the thought.
DeleteMy bro was going to divorce his wife because he was tired but by the time I finished explaining things to him, he went home and tried to resolve issues with her. If you want to divorce, that’s understandable but you see that remarrying ehn, na that one wey I no fit advise anyone to risk
Heaven is the Koko
Divorce and remarriage is allowed in the bible. Divorce is allowed on the grounds of infidelity. The bible says you can divorce and remarry and its actually in the new testament. You can divorce on the grounds of infidelity and you can remarry if you you are a believer and your spouse continues in his/her sin and remains an unbeliever. Before such a divorce, however, reasonable time should be allowed for the possibility of the unfaithful spouse returning and hoping he/she repents. 1 Corinthians 7:12-15. The sinful spouse is not supposed to remarry and anyone that marries the sinful spouse commits adultery, Matthew 5:32. The faithful spouse is allowed to remarry, after all means are exhausted to bring the sinful partner to repentance, the Bible permits release for the faithful partner through divorce and remarriage 1 Corinthians 7:15. God hates divorce and divorce should be the last resort after exhausting all means.
DeleteAnon 20:14, the Bible says "But if you cause one of these little ones who trusts in me to fall into sin, it would be better for you to be thrown into the sea with a large millstone hung around your neck." Mark 9:42, so please stop misinterpreting the Bible and certainly don't lead others into your path of perdition or you will be held accountable for their own blood.
DeleteYet if the unbelieving one leaves, let him leave; the brother or the sister is not under bondage in such cases, but God has called us to peace. 1 Corinthians 7:15
DeleteIf you are a believer and your spouse is an unbeliever, and your unbelieving spouse divorces you, then you are not under the bondage of never remarrying, you are free to remarry because God has called his children to peace.
It is very misleading and wrong to say "the Bible has been rewritten many times and probably had some additions made"
The Bible has been translated and all the translations of the Bible have one and the same meaning. There is no addition to the Bible. The Bible in itself is complete. What you have in King James Version, New Word Translation, Amplified Bible, New King James Version, New International Version, etc. They are all, one and the same thing and have the same meaning.
God hates divorce because of the effects on the divorcing parties and the children but he doesn't hate divorcees and neither does he hate their children.
Anon 20:44 My intention is not to lead anyone to sin. For you to say my path is one of perdition shows the type of believer you are. My path will never be one of perdition in Jesus name. Amen.
DeleteRead 1 Corinthians 7:12-15, in verse 15 it says, "Yet if the unbelieving one leaves, let him leave; the brother or the sister is not under bondage in such cases, but God has called us to peace.
If an UNBELIEVING SPOUSE divorces a BELIEVING SPOUSE, the believing spouse is free and not under bondage.
Its in your bible, read it.
Stella, it is very misleading to say the Bible has been rewritten so many times and probably had some additions. The Bible has been translated to different versions with the same meaning. KJV, NIV, Amplified, etc. They all have the same meaning. Nothing has been added to the Bible. The Bible is complete.
On the contrary chigirl, Nigerian first child don't have an insight on the topic divorce and the Bible. Under the law of Moses yes. I cannot go into the intricacies of his laws that would take a while day to explain. Cutting long explanation short, in the book of Mathew Jesus our Lord taught the difference between putting away and divorcing your spouse. So if you divorce your spouse the other party is very free to remarry. Our Lord cannot be unjust by tying you down for someone else's short comings. He is a fair and rightious God. Study and ask God for rhema behind the logos of his word.Joe
DeleteI am Anon 20:14, 21:02 and 21:53, I read Romans 7:1-3 today and it talked about not remarrying if a woman divorces. The topic of divorce has varying interpretations in the Bible and I would rather not lead anyone to sin. Please if you divorce based on infidelity or any form of violence and you are thinking of remarrying, go to God in prayers and let the Holy Spirit guide you. My earlier comments mean nothing as I am not an expert on divorce and remarriage. May God continue to guide us on the right path in Jesus name. Amen.
DeleteOn account of infidelity, no problem. Any other manner....
ReplyDeleteGwazie ndi yardi unu...
That one is in the old testament. If I get a divorce I will remarry. No be me kill Jesus abeg. Everyone deserves to be truly happy. My own Christianity no reach like that.
ReplyDeleteThen you're not yet born again. Stop Misquoting the scripture to please your worldly desires.
DeleteIt's in the new testament actually and the only ground for divorce is adultery according to the bible.
DeleteEven on that ground of divorce, you are still not to remarry as it will amount to adultery
DeleteI heard that second marriages last long and couples are committed to making it work. Who, when and where the study was made, I don't know.
ReplyDeleteTo some extent its very true.. In order to avoid being labelled the bad egg ,they tend to put extra effort to make it work...
DeleteMy husband and I tell ourselves almost everytime (when we have our 'pillow' talks) that divorce is not an option.
ReplyDeleteNow, to us, this doesn't mean if there are grounds for divorce, we wouldn't. It only means we would work really hard to to create those grounds for divorce.
God help us.
Divorce isn't our portion in Jesus name.
But if God forbid, anything happens and we do get divorced, If someone else I love and loves me want to get married to me, definitely because if we follow the bible to the last ehn, we will be committing a lot of atrocities. Me I will marry oh, then ask for forgiveness later 😊😊
Hiya dearie. Lol @ marry, and ask for forgiveness. I was waiting to read from you oo.
Delete*to not create those grounds
Delete😁@marry and ask for forgiveness.
DeleteIf you find love else where, biko marry.
Did I hear you say if we're to follow the Bible to the last " we would be committing a lot of atrocities " please tell me how? What do you mean by that statement? No one follows the teaching of Christ and commit atrocities because the word of God is just and perfect. People only commit atrocities when they follow the teaching of Satan whose mission on earth is to kill,to steal and destroy.
DeleteDivorce is not your portion in Jesus name.💕
DeleteEka, I am with you 100%, people will be quoting Bible until it happens to them.
DeleteIf I divorce today, I dey remarry I the next 6 months - 1 year. No time to mourn any man.
ReplyDelete@Elixir
DeleteYou just walk into the street and kidnap or arrest a man and command him to marry
you within six months? 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
No be small thing oo.
DeleteI dey believe you 😍😍😍
DeleteLoud it at the back, all this bad belle ladies everywhere, that is the only part in the Bible they read, yet you lie, steal, be wicked and more nna hell is the same o. Please marry if you find husband.
DeleteTiana, why do we bring up other kind of sin when we are told about one? So because we steal and lie l, we shouldn’t say the truth about what God wants from us and His Word?
DeleteLife shouldn’t be all about enjoyment and doing as we like as long as we are happy. What about eternity? What is more important; 100 years of bliss on earth or eternity of bliss? God help us all.
Please don’t take my comment as an insult.
Yes ooooo! No time.
DeleteTo the best of my knowledge, seperation or divorce is allowed in the Bible where there's a case of infidelity and as a human, I added abuse and violence of every kind.
ReplyDeleteObviously, the white man's addition to the Bible. Did l hear you say it's been rewritten many times? Nah, it's been rewritten countless times actually. That's why when you quote anything from the Bible, l just laugh. When you find the original Bible that was revealed to Jesus by God through the Holy Spirit (Angel Gabriel), then we can talk. Until then 👋👋👋
ReplyDeleteStay clear from anything related to the bible. Its none of ur business. If they face ur religion now, you will start crying blue murder.
DeleteDude, really STFU. If i say your prophet was high or delusional when he wrote the Koran, won't you track down my IP address to find me and behead me? You people should learn to shut up on issues you know zilch about.
DeleteIt's not true. The bible has never been rewritten. It was Martin Luther king who edited the bible during his protestant era when he was fighting the catholic church and he removed certain things from it like faith without works is dead because he believed that no man can merit heaven by works. The original bible remains intact and has never been rewritten please. Stella whoever told you that the bible has been rewritten is lying. People say a lot of things to justify their sins. The word is sacrosanct. Nobody should add or remove anything from it please.
DeleteIt's not true. The bible has never been rewritten. It was Martin Luther king who edited the bible during his protestant era when he was fighting the catholic church and he removed certain things from it like faith without works is dead because he believed that no man can merit heaven by works. The original bible remains intact and has never been rewritten please. Stella whoever told you that the bible has been rewritten is lying. People say a lot of things to justify their sins. The word of God is sacrosanct. Nobody should add or remove anything from it please.
DeleteAlways spewing ignorance!!!
DeleteFace front Mr fanatic!!
You really should stop talking about things you know nothing about. Let's respect each others religion...i'm sure you wouldn't like it if we said stuff we had no idea about concerning your Prophet and Quran. Not nice please.
DeleteKnow when to sit out a topic . It won't kill you.
DeleteI know you will spit trash on this post,learn to tolerate other people's religion and belief.
DeleteE sure me die that l know the Bible more than all of you. Every single one of you who replied me
Delete🚶♂️🚶♂️🚶♂️🚶♂️
You're very controversial...
DeleteReligious bigot! If someone insults your prophet or the Quran you would look for a dagger to kill.
DeleteStella please caution this fundamentalist.
Eesah/Isa stay clear. We are not talking about a man divorcing his wife and she remarries, divorced that one and go back to her first husband. After several men have passed a woman around the first husband will now take her back.
DeleteOr the one that says....
You shouldn't divorce unless one partner is unfaithful.
I hope if someone has written about the Quran u will not cry
DeleteYou say you know the Bible but not the God of the Bible. Knowledge of the letter kills.
DeleteWell the only basis for divorce according to the Bible is adultery and if that happens both spouses are free to remarry after the divorce. If the divorce was not a result of adultery then both parties will have to remain unmarried or come back together.
ReplyDeleteStop saying what you have no knowledge about. Both parties are to remain unmarried no matter their reason for divorce. They're not permitted to remarry except one is dead.
DeleteYou're not free to remarry oooh
DeletePele o anonymous 15:23 the all knowing . I don't know what you people were taught in church o but if you take time and read your Bible you'll know the bible permits remarriage after a divorce that was caused by adultery. That is the ONLY ground for remarriage except death. Read Bible before attacking another persons opinion
DeleteThe bitter truth is you aren't free to remarry but most times we tend to gratify our own desires...
DeleteBottom line, seek God's help, watch carefully and use your head when you want to marry to avoid stories...
We have FEW Holy BIBLE STUDENTS.
DeleteVermilion is perfectly correct. In analysing marriage & remarriage, we have to properly balance what the Lord Jesus Christ said in Matthew 19 & what Apostle Paul said in 1 Corinthians 7.
DeleteIn my case I don't even know what I am.
ReplyDeletemy Ex packed my things out of the house barely a month after our marriage over the flimsy excuses that we are not compatible, all my family's effort to reach out to him proved abortive, I had to move back to my family house bearing the shame and disgrace, Because any fallen marriage in Nigeria is definitely the woman's fault, but God knows I tried my best! I mean the is the man that started sleeping out on the day of our wedding and two weeks after that he never slept a day in that house, I slept alone in that big house all by my self conquering my fears of being alone.
after sending me out disgracefully and his family who never wanted him to marry my tribe in the first place supported him peddling all kind of bad characters about me. but I leave all those things for God to vindicate me. because the type of things this man peddle against me eh, you will be surprised we were only married for two weeks,one month on papers two weeks of him coming home to actually stay.but God is in control.
Five months after this epic disgrace, he came back begging telling me he was manipulated and it was not ordinary. but I told him that marriage was over the day he threw my things out. since he is a lawyer that he should please file for a divorce so we can both be free, and since it's obvious he loves someone else so he can be with. This man has refuse to file for a divorce. it's been 11months I don't even know what to do or were to start from I don't have 1kobo in my account to even start any proceedings, all I do everyday is pray to God to touch his mind to send me the dirvorce papers because I'm really depressed. I just want to be free from this night mare and cancel that part of my life from my memory.
Lawyers in the house how do you think I can get dirvorce from him. we've been separated for eleven months I even heard from a mutual friend that he has impregnated a girl and he is asking her to remove the pregnancy, I just want to rewrite my wrongs and start on a clean slate but this man is not making it easy at all.
I don't understand... I'm sorry for what you went/are going through but was it an arranged marriage? Didn't you court?
DeleteThis one is tough o. Let the experts in the house proffer solutions. It's well with you
DeleteJust pray to God to make everything right for the both of you, maybe he was manipulated but if you make up your mind to divorce him, go to a customary court and meet the registrar there, I think there's a way to do it without hiring a lawyer
DeleteMadam pls forgive ur husbsnd cos he was manupilated actually infact many marital crisis we have this days are actually as a result of evil manupilation from the enemies not every one that came to ur wedding be it trad or church were happy,some of the gift you received were evil gift .that why it is good to fast and pray b4 the d day and afterwards pray for ur marriage daily.some ppl that are ttcing is not ordinary the evil was done on d of their wedding it happened to my cousin sis
DeleteOh dear, so sorry
DeletePlease don’t wait for that man to file divorce. His plan is to keep you on the side till he finishes sharing his destiny outside, then he’ll come back again to tell you he was manipulated. Your marriage was dead on arrival and you know it. Beg your parents for money so you can pay a lawyer to initiate divorce proceedings for you, if possible an Annulment. 150-300k, maybe less
DeleteAlso get a job/handwork before you start to date again to avoid this issue of waiting for a man to do everything, including filing a divorce.
What if he's right? What if he was truly manipulated? What if the story of the girl is a rumour? I will advise you to date him again and know if you will continue with the marriage or not.
DeleteWhy not go back to him since he has asked for your forgiveness? Life of divorced young Lady is not all Rosy. I will say forgive him and start your life together on a clean slate. To err is human and to forgive is divine.
DeleteCyclone that's a long story for another day.
DeleteAnon.15:01, thanks so much I will ask around about that!.
Ladymary there is nothing to forgive, Because the spirit that manipulated him has obviously not left him,and mind you I prayed and fasted before and after the wedding. my traditional till my wedding I was on a three days straight fasting. Sometimes the home needs to be built by both parties not one.
Adebeke, that money is quiet big.hmmmm God is in control. and I'm not jobless, I'm a private school teacher who just lives from paycheck to paycheck.
QATG, there is nothing to rebuild,as there is a fine line between love and hate.
Anon,15;27, I'm not doing this because of any Rosy life. I just want peace of mind.
This man will string you along until you have wasted your good years on him.
DeleteCyclone...what kind of rubbish question is that?
KING XOXO MYSTERY
He is the one trying manipulate you,if you go back ,you will be subjected to endless emotional and financial abuse.
DeleteAny man that did what he did to you is heartless and will NOT change.
Go and borrow and divorce this man so you can have peace.
BJ forgive me if I made it sound like you’re jobless, I just hate it when one person acts like they have a hold on another person’s life especially because of money, which is what your husband is doing.
DeleteIt’s big money but you might need to cough it out somehow except you can wait till ur husband decides he wants to marry someone else then he will now file the papers.
There’s no shame in your situation, you’re not the first and you won’t be the last. That thing you had barely qualifies as a marriage to be honest. So don’t be afraid that you won’t find someone else cos you will find many good men
Never, I say ever go back to that man! That might be the beginning of a vicious cycle, unless you are both prayer warriors who can destroy whatever evil was used in manipulating him (that's if it is even true that he was manipulated).
DeleteHe might just be someone who is very unstable and irresponsible.
I went back to my ex and it became a cycle of separating, coming back and having a baby and separating and coming back together and having a baby...
He also left the responsibility of taking care of the children entirely to me when he walked out.
I married him at 22 years old and I was an orphan...
To cut the very long story short, I have been single handedly raising the 3 children we have together with the help of God alone.
The oldest was 6 years old when we separated, he is going to be 20 this year, the 2nd was 2 years old and is 16 years old now, and youngest was 10 months old and now 14 years old.
I decided not to remarry at the time because the children had been through so much already and I wasn't sure how and what it would be like.
I had to relocate abroad as the school fees in Nigeria became too overwhelming for me.
I am also yet to get divorced as I have been extremely busy with raising my children and building my career, and never thought of it. Also, I did not know of his whereabout and, I just decided to use the money I would have spent on divorcing him to feed my children.
I will advice you to find a way around the situation and remarry once it is sorted.
Lawyers in the house, over to you!
All will be well in Jesus name. Amen.
B. J. O
Kai....at anonymity 16:37 The sad part of your own story is when the kids are grown they will now go and search for their father and he will tell them lies about everything and they will believe till he shows them. Chain... Life... I'm at a cross road as this and will drop my chronicles as soon as my condition permits me for I really need advise.
DeleteMiserable XO whatever, leave your comment and put my name out of your miserable mouth/fingers. Dimwit. Was my question directed to you?
DeleteBJO
DeleteYour story sounds like a relative of mine
The man would impregnate her, disappear, come back, dissapear.
No one is manipulating him. He knows exactly what he is doing. He hasn't met his choice that's why he keeps coming back.
She wasted her youthful years on him. Now, she has advanced, she wants to remarry.
KING XOXO MYSTERY
@anonymous 17.55, I don't have a problem with them having a relationship with him, but unfortunately, the children are the ones begging me not to intervene. I can't and won't force it.
DeleteTheir memory of him is not good at all. They say they have forgiven him but they don't want any drama or trouble in their lives, as their only memory of him is as a troublemaker.
He had the opportunity to make amends for the children's sake at least (which I pleaded with him to), about 9 years ago but no, he did not.
They are all grown now, and unfortunately, children abroad think differently.
B. J. O
Pls if you find love after a divorce, marry. Anybody that doesn't like can go wage war in heaven.
ReplyDeleteBest comment ever!!!!
Delete😂😂😂😂😂
Delete😂😂😂😂😂😂
DeleteGod bless you!
DeleteIf you see love, you remarry but the issue here is that most ladies are on the loosing side. It's very hard to find genuine love after divorce as a lady. Most men will come just to sleep with you and go. I know some people may quote me wrong but it's the truth. But please ladies, try to be financially independent and very mature in mind before you get married. Most of all, be very patient with God to help you choose a spouse.
ReplyDeleteYes
DeleteYou have a very good point
DeleteThank you for this comment.just make your marriage work with God on your side all things are possible. Its bettet to have a partner for life than multiple partners. Its just a moral code
DeleteGood advice to the ladies.
DeleteStella, this is my story right now. Divorcing the devil and in future, if I meet someone who loves me, I might give it another shot. Annulling this ex-disaster of a union on all the lies he played.
ReplyDeletePlease if you find a quality man in the future, never hesitate to marry him abeg if you want to. Your happiness is paramount.
DeleteIt is well
DeleteMatthew 19:1-12,matthew 5:31-32,mark 10:11-12,luke 16:18.pls lets read these bible verses it will help.and pls stella the bible was not rewritten,the english were just modernised for a better understanding thank you
ReplyDeleteWell said LadyMary.
DeleteThe bible is one and the same Stella. Just different versions for better understanding.
Surely the bible was not rewritten but it was translated from the original tongue right, now in the process of translation due to some words meaning something completely different when translated, the translators may have subtly translated some words as close as they can to be similar to the original language, now this is where the human factor comes in....the bible should not just be read, it should be studied.
DeleteThank you oooo. The bible has never been rewritten please. It has remained exactly the way it is since the time it was compiled. Let's stop dousing people's faith with certain false statements
DeleteThank you very much. I don’t know where she got that notion. As much as we indulge in bad things, let us not forget that what is wrong is wrong and we don’t have to twist things to suit ourselves to make us feel better.
DeleteWant to know the truth; Bible teaching, Jesus teachings?
ReplyDeleteGod hates divorce Mal. 2:16
So we do all that is within our abilities to remain with our spouses;
living out the teachings of Christ in fasting, praying that we fall not into temptation,
studying the Word of God.
But peradventure a spouse commits sexual immorality,
then, it is within the other spouses discretion to;
Live with him and continue the marital covenant or
divorce him/her. Mark 10:11-12, Luke 16:11, Matthew 19:9
When a believer commits sexual immorality, or "sin unto death,"
there are steps -expulsion from the assembly 1 Cor. 5:12 etc. and
restoration Gal. 6:1. For that person to remarry (assuming the spouse divorced him/her)
she must have submitted herself to this process of being disciplined for her wrongs and
restored. When restored, this person like a new believer is a member of the kingdom again
and has the right to marry another believer.
When the Lord talks about a "divorced woman," he is talking about one that has broken the marriage
covenant and wasn't repentant and restored. Remember the parable of the prodigal son Luke 15:11-32,
he did not even think it right to be a son but a servant, but the father received him back.
He had experienced the hard way of the backslider. Note the "ring" put in his fingers and the clean robe, thereby restoring
the "marital covenant" with the bridegroom. Yes, I speak the mystery of marriage as it relates to Christ and the church.
Ephesians 5:21-33.
Please if you did not read the entire bible references, do not come under my comment to
🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️
What if the woman did not commit adultery or even the man but still got divorced like the case of the chronicle poster that married as a virgin and her husband threw her out cos she has nt given him a child.
DeleteThis your write up shows you lack in depth Knowledge of the scriptures. Pls ask the holy to reveal the truth to you after reading your Bible and while at it pls stop misleading gullible people. There's no room for remarriage after divorce in the Bible. After divorcing your partner due to sexual immorality you either remained unmarried till death or you forgive and take them back. Anything outside this is nothing but sin before God. All married divorcee are living in sin. Pure and simple.
DeleteGod hates divorce
DeleteThen act of putting away but he doesn't hate divorcees.
KING XOXO MYSTERY
@Lady Mary
DeleteThe man is the adulterer here. He divorced his wife for "any and every reason" and that
was not God's intention from the beginning when he instituted marriage. Matthew 19:7-9
@15:39
DeleteThanks for your rebuke.
I am not "misleading gullible people." You saw all
the comments on this post and chose to read mine, wow!
There is a reason why you perched here. Nobody is held at
gunpoint to read my comments and obey them.
I won't ask your "holy" (I know not what) to
reveal anything to me. The one Jesus revealed in his Word is enough.
Did you read the Scriptures I cited before 🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️?
On the ground of infidelity it's allowed
ReplyDeleteThat's what I know.
Lemme goan ask my pastor
If for any reason my marriage doesn’t work, I will definitely repackage myself enter market and remarry jare.
ReplyDeleteMen remarry quickly, I wonder why some women tend to think their lives are over after their first marriage.
That’s how in this town I know a Nigerian lady studying for her PhD that brought her useless Nigerian boyfriend over here after marrying him in Nigeria with pressure from the guy.
He has come here now and changed, was beating her a lot, madam never called the police even after we told her not to take that nonsense, to at least hold off being pregnant.
But no, upon all the beating and telling her she’s not his spec she carry belle. He initially won’t work, and she had to pick up retail work to make ends meet even with her pregnancy and PhD workload.
The next thing he pressured her to file for work permit for him, and since he got that one, Oga doesn’t send her again. He know has PR sef, and a new kind of lamentation has started from her.
He doesn’t come home anymore, even though her mother is here with them taking care of their baby, the guy doesn’t even respect that. He said he’s waiting for the woman to go and he will move out, that she better start looking for a smaller house she can afford on her own.
He somehow helped his Nigerian girlfriend come over here, and told his wife that the love of his wife has come and if she wants to make their marriage work then she has to stop monitoring him.
Someone that didn’t have money before suddenly had money to spend, taking her out on public holidays, spending money on fixing her new apartment, trying to find her a job, while with his own wife he goes Dutch on everything, even while knowing that her only source of income is her PhD allowance since she’s on scholarship.
What pains us all in this story is that her anger is that he hasn’t slept with her for over 1 year even with the emotional abuse and constantly telling her she no reach, and telling her he has helped her life by giving her fine child since she’s ugly.
She still seats there hoping he’ll come back, trying to negotiate with him. A beautiful intelligent woman o, that such a tout shouldn’t even be able to look at in the first place.
I can never understand how women can put up with a man that treats them with so much disdain, I’ve sent her chronicles from this blog tire. Anyway what’s my own sef.
You better face front and mind your business.
DeleteSometimes i ask myself what makes some people settle for less and become comfortable in misery .
DeleteOne answer only -very low self esteem.
DeleteNo one who marries for love, everr plans to divorce. But things happen. What if they discovered in marriage that they married the wrong spouse, they married someone who disguised, they married an abuser, they married a pedophile, a rapist, a narcisit, etc. Are they suppose to remain?
ReplyDeleteAnd if they get out are they suppose to remain unmarried?
Especially the born again Christian that made a mistake in marriage.
Very intersting topic Stella. Waiting to read comment
This topic is very controversial, different people( Christians) have different views including pastors, confusing people Upandan, it is not enough to just read and quote scripture, but let us ask God for understanding.
ReplyDeleteMay God help us all.
If u ain't happy divorce and find your Happiness, I believe the bible doesn't support divorce but times are different 🦋
DeleteWhen Christians adamantly insist that a divorced person has no right to remarry, i always wonder.
ReplyDeleteYes the Bible says that Gods plan was never divorce but that he allowed Moses to give the Israelites the law of divorce because of the hardness of their heart.
So my question is... the same God who gave an allowance to the Israelites, is it not the same God today? Are the Israelites more deserving of mercy than we are? Why would we then hold ourselves to ransome?
We all know that polygamy was not God’s initial plan (because well, he created one man for one woman according to the Bible), but so many polygamous men in the Bible whom God had special relationships with (cue Abraham, Jacob and David). And please nobody should tell me how Abraham only slept with his maid, that’s as good as marriage in those days.
In my opinion, forget what christian ‘lawmakers’ insist on. The same bible says that it is better to marry than to burn. You get a divorce at 24years, and they say you must remain single ‘till your ex husband dies’, as if you should carry gun and go and kill him yourself, because we all know that you will not remain without sex and companionship for the rest of your life.
I know someone who has remained without a husband because church people insisted, I will tell you that it is not easy, I look at her and marvel because even she tells me it isn’t easy. now after more than 20years, she needs a companion and no it’s not just for sex, and I don’t blame her because it is how God created us, to need sex and companionship.
The same lawmakers will make a remarried man pastor while insisting that a divorced woman cannot remarry. I have seen it happen many times. look at the pastor who just lost his wife (who he married after a divorce) and everyone was eulogizing on how they are both saints.
Don’t allow a fellow human to hold you to ransome when God has provided a way out for you.
The ex wife left him and remarried. His church then RCCG didn't support him to remarry,one of the reasons he left that church.
DeleteOne can remarry now after a divorce based on infidelity. I will add domestic violence,homosexuality or lies/deceit. God is not so difficult, it is some of our clergy that makes him look difficult.
Kindly take time to know your God and develop a relationship with him.
I hope you're aware that not everyone is destined to marry? Sometimes humans are ready to put up with a situation naturally but not ready to obey God's will. If a lady doesn't find a man to marry her, won't she stay unmarried for the rest of her life? Will she kidnap another person's husband? So if she can stay unmarried if she doesn't find a husband, why can't she remain unmarried to obey God's instructions? One of my aunts got married quite early and in about 8 years of marriage, her husband died. She has remained unmarried since then because she has 4 kids. Her husband died in 1991. So tell me, why is it easy to remain unmarried as a widow but not a divorcee? All these claims of people seeking for happiness are utter nonsense. You don't even know how long you'll live and you claim you want to marry for companionship and happiness. What if you die a year after that marriage? Wouldn't you have preferred to have kept the word of God if eventually you find yourself in hell? As for me, keeping God's commands supersedes everything else.
DeleteIt is still the same RCCG clergy that told a divorced woman I know not to marry but made a remarried man in that same church a pastor. RCCG is my church and I love it but I have come to realize that clergy men/women are human too and they put their own spin on stuff.
DeletePeople are anti-marriage after divorce until they are in the same situation, then they realize that God is merciful and they do what they want. I’m replete with stories like this.
Ultimately like you said, all man should know God for themselves
Anon 17:59 I have asked a question in my previous comment which you conveniently failed to answer. I’m truly interested in an answer to that question and not to do any back and forth argument.
DeleteIt is very difficult to be without a companion (sexual and emotional) as an adult especially when you have been exposed to sex before and you very well desire companionship. It is only in Nigeria that widows are relegated to be unmarried because of nonsense cultural beliefs that no man will accept to father another man’s child (a lot of them still desire sex and they date out but don’t get married).
Nobody can convince me otherwise about a situation that I have to live with daily especially when you’re steady collecting nacks and enjoying companionship in your own house.
1000 likes
DeleteIf I divorce today I will not remarry...not because it is a sin but God did not bring me out of a bad marriage to go and put my head in another problem.I will stay on lane forever.
ReplyDeleteI agree with you but my marriage is really good .
DeleteWill NEVER remarry oo.
If we divorce,I'm strictly staying on my own lane
Shakiti leave matter o,many ladies say same then they meet a 2nd lovely one who makes their heart do Yori Yori and off they go,leaving their kids with their grandma.
DeleteHow is you jare？
Na una sabi. If I divorce my husband today and want to remarry, I'll definitely do. Me that doesn't believe in church wedding. You want to put me in prison because I was once married to you. So I should be waiting for you to die before I move on? Wonderful!
ReplyDeleteHmmm this is a very sensitive issue, for we Muslims, if the husband does not pronounce divorce himself, no divorce o.
ReplyDeleteMy ex husband and I have been separated for about 3 and a half years, no communication between us for two years now. If I meet a serious guy who is ready for marriage, I am surely going to remarry. I will not even look for him to pronounce divorce at all cos as far as am concerned we are no more married!
The thing that makes me so angry is that some muslim men see this as avenue to disturb the woman by refusing to pronounce divorce so that she can't remarry. Just say I divorce you to the woman three times and let her be free, no! They expect you to start begging them. Rubbish!
Man wey go try this one with me go jam real Agbako. Do you neeed to have anyone present to witness the #I divorce you?#. Or camera? My dear, divorce yourself from that man. If he comes to fight, tell him he divorced you.
DeleteFauzzy babe, why not divorce him. I'm not a Muslim but I've read that Islam is the only religion that allows a woman to divorce her husband. Strange and interesting that as constricting as Islam is, it's done more for women's right than other religions. Go to Sharia court, they will sort it out.
DeleteLeemao 😂 🤣 @anonymous
DeleteAs for me.. Everything I'm reading here today is new to me o, e be like say I no dey this world since!😂😂😂😂
I just want to live a happy, simple, burden free life (I complete my solat as a muslim, I talk to my creator everyday and during the midnight..I'm religious, simple at it and still imperfect as I'm just human. I believe God can never be human so I don't stress my head or heart). If anyone decided to be a pain in my life, I really don't think I need any body's help on making a decision! I'm putting myself first because no one can understand like you do.
@Fauzzy.. Please do what's best for you? Don't let world people place a baggage on your shoulders. You are only facing God at the end of it all, not them. And the goodnews is.. God isn't human 😁
Many cultures have removed 'till death do us part' and replaced it with 'till as far as we can go'. A good compromise for our very unrealistic generation
ReplyDelete😂😂😂very funny.
DeleteI honestly don't understand why people who have good earnings and children remarry?
ReplyDeleteI'm in a really good marriage but if we divorce,I certainly will not be saddling myself with a man permanently by marriage.
Companionship and bedmatics can happen without marriage.We meet up and he goes back to his house,simple.
I have children to take care of and a career which supplies me with cash,what else does a person need?
Nawa o.
Good for you but everyone is not you.
DeleteSome men get tired of leaving your bed and want a commitment
KING XOXO MYSTERY
Honestly, I will never marry again. To saddle myself with a man who will probably be older by then, needing more attention?? No way. Start dealing with new in-laws, change of name, new village,adjusting my kids to the new family, etc..it's just not worth it.
DeleteMy kids and I are fine. When my kids leave the house, I will adopt more kids to train. I think I will be happier that way that the burden of marriage again in middle age.
So, all the white people who remarry will go to hell na, is that what we are trying to say. So heaven is for only Nigerians cos we are the only ones who interpret this version of the Bible well. Let me say it loud if you ever have the notion that a human being like you should remain with another person despite the spiking rate of killing and domestic violence in marriages and that in the event of human beings like you walking away then they should spend the rest 50 years alone even if they find love in other places, can you wish it upon yourself or sister. Na God goes punish you and let me tell you, you will reach hellfire first.
ReplyDeleteSo, all the white people who remarry will go to hell na, is that what we are trying to say. So heaven is for only Nigerians cos we are the only ones who interpret this version of the Bible well. Let me say it loud if you ever have the notion that a human being like you should remain with another person despite the spiking rate of killing and domestic violence in marriages and that in the event of human beings like you walking away then they should spend the rest 50 years alone even if they find love in other places, can you wish it upon yourself or sister. Na God goes punish you and let me tell you, you will reach hellfire first.
ReplyDeleteHahahahaha 😂 🤣 😂 🤣 😂 🤣
DeleteFor those of us who truly want the truth concerning this matter, please let's read mark 10:2-12, Mathew 19:3-11, Mathew 5:31-32, Luke 16:18, Ephesians 5:30-33, 1Corinthians 7:10-11, Malachi 2:16NLT. For those of us who thinks you can divorce on the grounds of infidelity and remarry, that is not scriptural. You can separate on the grounds of infidelity, domestic violence or any other grievous issues but you are not allowed to remarry. The only time the man or woman is free from the vow of marriage is death. This is for Christians. Even Jesus said all cannot accept this saying but only those to whom it has been given. So this is for Christians. There's no place in the scripture where there's a provision for one to divorce and remarry. Let those who have ear hear what the Spirit of God is saying.
ReplyDeleteWhat of those that marry for paper.
ReplyDeleteHell fire gats big sha
Hahahahaha 😁🤣😂😂🤣🤣🤣
DeleteSome people will say but even some pastors divorce and remarry, that a pastor did that does that now change the word of God? Any Pastor who divorce his wife and marry someone else is commiting adultery. That's what the scripture says. So please as Christians follow the Word of God not what anybody is doing.
ReplyDeleteIs adultery the only sin. Make we hear word. Nigerians and hypocrisy. What of the six sins God hates and seven are abomination unto him. Are we guilty of any. People always hammering fornication and adultery as if na the only sin for bible. Bible was interpreted by men at their own discretion. A lot went under while trying to transcribe it. My summary is do good to your fellow men and God. Leave God to judge people the way he chooses to. If God were a Nigerian, David and the rest won't smell heaven. David was not perfect but he was a man after God's heart. See the way some talk about hell as if they are the judges or they have the key to sending people there.
DeleteIf you see man to marry , my sister marry after divorce. Pride and lies are worst sins according to proverbs... .Nigeria Christians are just fanatics and always ready to judge and condemn meanwhile they sin differently. Religion is overrated and I always jump them. Let God judge me as He pleases. I'm not afraid of any outcome. My own is to apply the golden rule in all I do. All these unnecessary Christian doctrines are not what I'm particular about. If ever I marry and divorce unfortunately happens, I won't kill myself for it. Dem no born me with any man, na only me follow come out, why should my life depend on another mortal just because we happened to marry....abegi!
If we are to follow the Bible to the last:
ReplyDelete1. You will not inflate contract, it is stealing
2. You will not collect your village or county money and deposit into your account and use it to “enjoy”, if you “love your neighbor as yourself” which is the summary of the law
3: Joyce Meyers that is popular in Nigerian Pentecostal circle left her abusive marriage. You guys probably listen to her in awe and admiration!
4. Joel Osteen’s Dad divorced his first wife to marry his mom, the one that God healed of liver cancer over 25 years ago
5. Corruption that has led to serious unemployment and even youth suicide is due to stealing, its a bigger sin with God for “in heaven they neither marry or give in marriage”, there are no spouses in heaven.
Faith without works and Old Testament Judaism is what a lot of Nigerians practice and its why the nation has more churches and mosques than common sense! The only sin that God cannot forgive is sin against the Holy Spirit, read Hebrews. No abuse or curse it goes back to sender. Why are you all now wearing horse hair and lipstick and nail polish made with scales of fish? Hypocrisy is a Nigerian! Please flee any abusive marriage and remarry.
God is not in your image but we are in his image, many try to do the reverse. They make God a wicked Nigerian parent! The wife of a prominent pastor in Nigeria was married briefly with no child to an abusive man! It’s not known by many as it was over 30 yrs ago. Thank God she fled. Some of you here probably attend their massive church or send kids to their university! Flee from every appearance of evil! Including domestic violence, emotional abuse, violent in laws etc! Jesus is the mediator of a new and better covenant built on better promises!
“He has shown thee o man what is good and what the Lord requires of thee...” What God requires is in Micaiah , justice, mercy and humility in your walk with him. How can you steal the commonwealth and claim Christianity and put yokes on those fleeing marriages “not made in heaven”?
Why don’t you make such absolute statements on thieves that Jesus used cane to send out of the temple, thieves pretending to be pastors, civil servants, politicians, cronies and so on? If your right hand causes you to sin cut it off and get prosthetic arm, God gets it and does not see as man sees! He looks at your heart!
Anonymous 18:04. Your write up is beautiful and intelligent. Very articulate. God bless you!
Delete♡♡♡♡ kisses
DeleteYou get original anointing. Chop 😘
DeleteBeautiful
DeleteNo wonder some husband commit domestic violence with hopes of killing the wife so they can remarry. Some women poison their husband to death because they are too cowardly to walk away because it is till death do they part.
ReplyDeleteSo if they can't leave, they might as well kill.
Or stay apart and fornicate without marrying?
KING XOXO MYSTERY
I don’t pray for divorce for myself, but if i happens, I will remarry and remarry and remarry again if it’s what I want and, the opportunity presents itself.
ReplyDeleteI used to be a fundamentalist but as the years go by, I realise things are more grey than black and white. We all lost a wonderful woman some weeks ago, and the drama surrounding her marriage. Her husband's first wife cheated, remarried and had children while the man was told he couldn't remarry. I'm glad he did and was happy even if it was temporary. Years ago, I met a young man of 28 divorcing because his beautiful wife was a lesbian, he still didn't want a divorce but she demanded it. I can go on and on, is it the man that his wife travelled to the US a month after their wedding and remarried over there and divorced him. He's an RCCG member and was told although his situation is unfortunate, he can't remarry.
ReplyDeleteIf we look at this carefully, we are only encouraging murder, why should someone hurt you so badly and can move on and be happy, while you are lonely and sad?
The other person can just plan a clever murder, kill the man or woman, get away with the murder, obtain forgiveness and start a new life with a new spouse. Do you know tha after all the drama with charles and Diana, Charles married Camilla as a widower even though he was divorced? The justification for his marriage was that he had no living spouse, they brilliantly left out the part that Camilla still has an ex-husband.
Rules should be for humans not humans for the rule. If you find happiness as a divorcee please grab it, life is too short. Don't allow someone that has hurt you dictate how you would leave the rest of your life and be happy in theirs because you are bound by religious restrictions.
Anon 17:05,most people on this blog are hypocritical and two faced. Someone even said, you will go to hell if you remarry and another stated that,those that remarried are sinners.Really! I have realized that Nigerians are so judgemental.
ReplyDeleteSecondly, people are so comfortable to judge others but when they find themselves in their shoes they do the same thing. This reminded of a girl, then in school that criticizes and judges single women. She talks like people on this blog and quoting bible.She is also a single woman today and got pregnant out of wedlock.
I am a Christian and also working hard to make heaven cos it's a personal race.Let God judge divorcees as none has a right to say who goes to hell fire or not.We all sin differently but quick to condemn others as we think it does not affect us.
My landlady was thrown out by her husband today because she was unable to bear a child for him after 4 years. He married this young girl as a virgin and she is 24 years now.Her family told him that the bride price will be returned for their daughter to remarry and continue her life.I have never met a lady as respectful, meek, generous and easy going as this our landlady. She is a true Christian and practices it with all her heart. She had also confided in me, in ways God uses her.I am work in progress and my issue is temper but she takes all sorts of insults from people and doesn't respond due to her being a Christian. So saints on this blog, she will go to hellfire by remarrying or wait for the husband to die.
Is it better for her to remarry or start to sleep around as no one is above temptation? Saints on this blog, kindly respond.
Additionally, I am a woman in my forties and currently dating a divorcee with 2 children and planning to get married by the grace of God. So, I shouldn't get married to him cos he is divorced.I am single and has never been married. Tell me, how many men of my age are still single? Apparently,the widower that proposed to me last year is a serial baby daddy with different women,so I had to run.
Larry King of CNN fame has married 7 times. I’m not saying it’s good but like Jesus told the Woman at the Well who had 6 husbands and was at that time a live-in girlfriend, “neither do I condemn” him. “Go and sin no more”. Leave a domestic or emotionally violent marriage.
ReplyDeleteGod gives multiple chances so choose wisely and don’t repeat old mistakes that is “go and sin no more”. The “go” is release and forgiveness while the “sin no more” was an admonition and counsel to not repeat old mistakes. God is God, he made man in his image, you cannot make God a Nigerian 200 ethnic group image or an American several ethnicities image. It’s not biblical.
The reason many don’t come to Christ is our glorification of parenting methods in our cultures. If the parenting by cane and wickedness was so good why did it breed corrupt offsprings and looters and a messed up nation!
Some with abusive dad cannot receive the free forgiveness God offers through Jesus because of the image of “father” they have. God is the ultimate GOOD Father!
Will you let a man beat your daughter daily and humiliate her? “If ye then being evil or human know how to... how much more will the Heavenly Father give good gifts..”. If you won’t stand by and watch a man or woman maltreat your child, how do you think The Father in Heaven feels!
True Christianity is a way of daily living and constant decision making. Religion including Christianity when perverted and misinterpreted is bad!
Search the scriptures, read the story of the Samaritan woman at the well, married 6 times and living at the time Jesus met her with a 7th man, unmarried!
How many of the disciples did we read about their spouses other than Peter!
Marriage while compared to the the “Christ and his bride” implied he was coming for a “spotless” bride. No mention of how often the bride changed clothes or even transformed.
The church in Nigeria is complicit in the corruption and dehumanization of regular Nigerians, collecting offerings from loot! Keeping quiet till corruption enveloped the land while they got richer!
Rev Martin Luther King Jr led the civil rights movement till Lyndon Johnson signed the civil rights act and JFK and Robert his brother lost their lives partly due to their civil rights evolution & views. MLK is why Eleke Crescent is in black and Asian countries issuing visas, never forget that. Until about 20 years ago there was no Canadian embassy in naija but Ghana!
Where is the church in Nigeria in face of the most heinous and massive heist in the history of any country? We love Elijah, Elisha, Isaiah etc but did you all realize MLK followed in their steps?
No Nigerian GO or pastor is like them. Cofronting Authorities/King Ahab & Jezebel, Elijah shut heavens and there was no rain for years with Ahab & his wicked First Lady pursuing his life!
Prophet Nathan told King David or in today’s world President David that he sinned by killing Uriah & marrying Bathseba! Do we have any pastor or GO that can seek audience with PMB to tell him that kind of thing not get contract or concession!
The perverted form of religion rooted in materialism is what is practiced in Nigeria. The Pharisees have logs of compromise with corruption and seek to remove specks of fleeing from abusive marriages with threats of going to hell as if they hold the keys to the library of God where the Books especially the book of life is kept. Remember “ The books were opened, and another book was opened” in Revelation! They do not keep the keys to God’s library.
Leave any abusive relationship but “do not continue in sin that grace may abound”. Remarry with care, God looks at things humans do not see!
There is so much fallacy about that Bible has been rewritten. Rewritten for what purpose? Toremove or add or to water it down or change meanings? If that were so, then they would have to change the many orininal versions andaand translation.... The message of the Bible has not been changed despite many translation and you can still find those that are in corcodance to the original. The Bible was originally wriuten in Aramaic or Hebrew (the old testament) the new testament was in Greek. The earliest complete Bible was in Greek and then in Latin. The English translation came many centuries later. That English version has had to be revised and the English language evolved to what it is now...
ReplyDeleteI can tell categorically that Bibles authentic to the original are available... Visit biblehub.com
If anyone think the Bible was brought down from heaven by angel or dictated verbatim... They will be disappointed. The Bible is the inspired word of God written by men as revealed to them by the Holy Spirit. It's not a single book but a collection of books put together into one book. The Catholic did the canonicity of the Bible early in the 2nd or 3rd century at a Council of the church to prevent anyone from adding or subtracting from the Bible. Early Bibles were handwritten and it took years to complete. It wasn't until the 15/16th century when the printing press was invented that explosion of printing different Bibles and translation came into being. Many versions of the Bible were full of errors and we're burnt but some escaped and are the hands of many today. Notable the King James version of the Bible...
There is no grounds for divorce in the Bible and in Christianity... The era of the Bible was especially the time of Jesus it was a Jewish era and Christ was trying to teach them the right way... Jews were given a way out by Moses to divorce, it was not God's plan... Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to give a written notice of divorce but for you (Believer in Christ) there is no divorce, except you were not married before God, you were just cohabitating... The case for adultery or infidelity is a result of wrong translation...
Separation is allowed if it is unhealthy and toxic for them to stay together... There's also annulment where the marriage was done under false pretence or forced or conditional consent.
Stella, you are a journalist and a Christian, matters like this should have a priest or a Church person versed to give an expert advice... This town hall opinions will end up making people misinformed and continue living in ignorance...
Please what is divorce for a Christian, is it after the trade? or after the church marriage?
ReplyDeleteIn as much as I am a feminist, the word of God is perfect
ReplyDelete