STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
ONLINE AFFAIR
Can I risk it NOW to see someone I have been talking to online?
We met online. I'm 32, he is a 37 year old and lives in the same country as me, but 10 hours away.
Can I risk it NOW to see someone I have been talking to online?
We met online. I'm 32, he is a 37 year old and lives in the same country as me, but 10 hours away.
He stays in a covid hot spot and we both strongly believe that he just recovered from covid. He came down with a fever, chest pains and lost his sense of taste and smell. He is an essential worker and hasn't been able to find time away from work to come and see me. I currently stay with my 67 year old widowed mother who is hypertensive and diabetic. I originally work about 2 hours away from my mum, but I am a teacher and away from the classroom at the moment.
I like him and I believe he likes me too. He has told me he likes me a lot and I have been able to discern that he truly does. I have told him that I have endometriosis and infertility and painful sex may be issues for me and he has told me that he will be able to work through this with me. I can discern that he is a man with a healthy libido but I try to stress it to him at every chance I get that I am religious. He seems to be okay with this too.
I like him and I believe he likes me too. He has told me he likes me a lot and I have been able to discern that he truly does. I have told him that I have endometriosis and infertility and painful sex may be issues for me and he has told me that he will be able to work through this with me. I can discern that he is a man with a healthy libido but I try to stress it to him at every chance I get that I am religious. He seems to be okay with this too.
He has a range of emotional intelligence that I have hardly seen in any of my exes. I have snooped around his LinkedIn, Facebook and Instagram. I have searched for his siblings and parent's social media. I don't think he's a crazy person or catfishing. He sends me photos of his siblings, nieces and inlaws, etc. We do video calls a lot too.
There's a strong likelihood that he may be "the one".
If I travel to see him, I have made plans to self isolate for 3 weeks at my other house (where I work and away from my mother). But again, I am talking him into coming to see me. He has been open to it and is currently trying to squeeze in time off work. What are the health risks? How can we make this work? Covid may not leave us anytime soon, should we put this meeting off? Indefinitely? Or till when?
*My mind is messed up by that story i posted here a few days back about the lady who lost her eyes and ears and whatever after she met up with her Online lover in a hotel..Please be careful and stay in a hotel room and dont go to his house......stay at the lobby and get to know him close range,let everyone know you are with him and let him know that everyone knows that you are with him and have his details.......
If I travel to see him, I have made plans to self isolate for 3 weeks at my other house (where I work and away from my mother). But again, I am talking him into coming to see me. He has been open to it and is currently trying to squeeze in time off work. What are the health risks? How can we make this work? Covid may not leave us anytime soon, should we put this meeting off? Indefinitely? Or till when?
*My mind is messed up by that story i posted here a few days back about the lady who lost her eyes and ears and whatever after she met up with her Online lover in a hotel..Please be careful and stay in a hotel room and dont go to his house......stay at the lobby and get to know him close range,let everyone know you are with him and let him know that everyone knows that you are with him and have his details.......
"Likes me so much"
ReplyDeleteIs not same thing as
"Love me".
Love never fails, is patient, kind, does not seek it's own ...
If he does not have time for you now, how will he find time for you then?
Talking about "then?"
Your mind is filled with "marriage" even though you don't want to call that spade by its name.
Are you ready to fornicate and be fornicated with? Let's call another spade by its name.
Because, if you go, you are vulnerable. Kpom kwem!
Teacher, shouldn't you teach yourself some sense and let the man do the chasing? Essential workers have off duty days.
🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️
Hey God🤦. 15:06 I pity your kids, they won't be able to open up to you their mother/father and have that parent/kid talk because of your judgmental nature. You better change.
Delete100 likes
DeleteWho is this? 😂
DeleteSandra her kids would be alright. No parent is perfect. The Lord has a way of filling in the gap. At least she is better than some parents who encourage children in iniquity.
DeleteHow can he love her already when they have never met???? Please get real and always read to understand before commenting. And if he comes to her couldn't they also fornicate??
DeleteI think the anon 👆15.16 wasn't lying after all. He or she made some valid points. Listen in niaja we dont like to call things what they are, judgemental or not.
DeleteI totally agree with the anon that the poster is thinking about marriage when she never even meet the guy...nawa oo Which kind thing be this? I know the hustle is real...but.
Secondly the fornication thing, it's on her mind as well, hence trying to explain herself(endometriosis,painful sex etc.)why mention religion@poster?keep that shit apart.
Aunty posters do what you can to see the guy, but CAREFUL is the watch word, and keep an open mind...delete this marriage nonsense in your head...HE ALSO MIGHT NOT BE THE ONE.
P.s. let me assume by essential worker you mean health professional, aunty everybody gets 2 days off, that's if you are working 5 days a week, or you get 4 days off a week if you work 3(12hour shift) so wetin be I no get time?
I hope say the guy dey honest with you oo. Happy meeting.🙂
I don't think he can say love since they haven't met yet; if he does then it's smoke & mirrors. These are unusual times, especially for essential workers. They are the unsung heroes of this covid. My friend in residency in NewYork is going crazy. 80hr work weeks, 14hr stretch, no sleep. My cousin, a nurse in Massachusetts has had covid and recovered, and he said almost all the nurses & physicians have had it. You get 2weeks only to go home and isolate after which they resume work, covid or not. Texas Medical Center, the largest medical city in the world was at 100 percent capacity last week. Healthcare workers are the ones carrying the burden. Don't know about poster's guy but if he is in a hot spot, he is most likely not lying. Of course they can wait and monitor the curve and meet when this is over.
DeleteDoes it not start with like before it becomes love? Truly let the man do the chasing. Use this coro time to bond over the phone.
Delete@Anon is harsh and judgemental but speaks the truth, still if he/she were God, I will be on the high road to hell🥺🥺
DeletePoster, the fact that you sent this in instead of going to meet him shows you know it isn't the right time to. Listen to that small inner voice. That is the voice of reason, the Holy Spirit telling you to wait.
DeleteCovid is not a joke. The fact that he recovered doesn't mean you will, if you catch it (I pray you don't). Continue with the video calls and when you eventually meet him, follow Stellar advise.
My dear very limited off duty days now. Essential workers are at risk and many of them are getting COVID. When that happens, the healthy colleagues have to fill in for those in isolation. Then the healthy ones get sick, then the sick and recovered ones take over. If they don't do this, patients will die. Infact your isolation days are your off duty days.
DeleteI think you should wait for a month or 2 more. Covid 19 is a big deal. Pls don't risk it
ReplyDeletePoster. Please follow Stella's advice. Meet him at the hotel instead. Your end or his. Whichever is fine. Also pay for separate rooms to get to know him better.
DeleteA month or two doing what exactly? Corona isn't going anywhere. So she need to protect,isolate, distance,mask herself while at it, so her butterflies in her stomach can rest.
DeleteDon't you dare kiss him unt you see the recent negative covid test, that's if you love your life and your mama.
A man FINDS a wife and FINDS a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord.
ReplyDeleteLet him take his annual vacations or off duty days for your sake and come down.
I no fit shout o. 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️
Hian! Did we read the same chronicle? She said he is to come visit but her concern is the health threat it might pose to her beloved mother. The guy visiting her is not an issue.
DeletePoster, I understand your fears and I have often wondered what dating in times like this will be like for singles. I think seeing him openly as Stella advised is ideal but you must take all safety percussion at least for your mom's sake. Please. Just pray the vaccine comes through quickly so the vulnerable will be protected. Then you both can date normally because this disease is not going anytime soon at this pace. Our only hope is that God come through our scientists for an effective prevention vaccine. All the best.
Which wife, unu abiakwa, they are just trying to meet one on one, nobody dey marry anybody yet. 😀😀my country people and marriage ehkwa!
Delete@Adanne
DeleteWhat does the poster mean by he might be "the one?"
Please sell that your hypocrisy and collect no change. Inukwa?🦜🦜🦜🦜
*Please don't go to see him, let him come to you and stay in a hotel.
ReplyDelete*You guys should always always meet at an open place when he visits, eg restaurants, even library sef.
*When going to meet at the restaurant/wherever please inform someone.
*Ask the necessary/very important questions, don't shy away from them. ASK,ASK,ASK!
Dear poster be careful of your movement. Allow him to come see you since he is willing.
ReplyDeletePoster IS YOUR MOM'S LUFE WORTH NOTHING TO YOU? Jeez!😣😣😣
DeleteIf he ends up not being "the one", would you bear exposing your mom to this risk?
Please, no visits on both sides until the coast is clear from this Covid-19.
Poster please, be very careful.
ReplyDeleteI suggest you put your visitation on hold since, he lives in Covid-19 hotspot and he's still just recovering.
Don't risk your life or that of your mother
I wish you luck
If you no wan go abeg stay your
ReplyDeletehouse. You're giving all this details because you're pessimistic about it already.
Dey your dey.
As in!!! E no dey her mind
DeletePoster just let your love know that u are meeting with him. Pls be careful.
ReplyDeleteWhy risk it all? You said it yourself. He lives in a covid hotspot. I think you guys should pospone it for now. If you decide to go, plz be careful.
ReplyDeleteIs there a way he can go get tested for the virus just to rule out the fear that he may have been infected? Secondly just as Stella has rightly suggested, be careful when you guys decide to finally meet. You should encourage him to pay you a visit instead. I hope it works out for you guys. I wish you all the best
ReplyDeleteI think you're living in a fool's paradise
ReplyDeleteAs in i honestly do not understand the poster
DeleteYou’re risking your health , and that of your widowed mother to go see a stranger ?? How desperate can you be ?? So because you’re 32 years you want to risk it all ? Women have ended up dead after they went to meet strangers they met on the internet. And it is never wise to chase a man. Wait till this virus goes down, then let him come see you . Don’t be a desperate woman
ReplyDeleteI’m just wondering how you painted his perfect picture without meeting him yet. I don’t trust guys that appear perfect. Meet him in person and spend time with him then you can decide if he has all these qualities or not.
ReplyDeleteLover girl be careful na express you dey go so
ReplyDeleteI just tire!!!
DeletePoster, Please, dont go to see anybody. If you have decided to see him, don't go to see him alone, even if he comes to your base!!!
Too manybquestions,pls it's not worth it,the whole thing is complicated,you guys can keep communicating till December,watch situation of things,you are risking your life especially your grandma's,peace✌️
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like your mind is made up, you just need more "push". IF you see him, let it be in an open space o, and don't trust him completely, atleast not now. All these "he's not crazy" talk, they don't write thaton one's head. In all, BE CAREFUL.
ReplyDeleteWhy not postponed the visit for now? Let him be the one to visit
ReplyDeleteAll the best
gurl why are you both already talking about sex stuff when you havnt even met? You shouldn’t even have told him about your infertility stuff yet. Has he asked you to be his girlfriend officially? Please if he hasn’t asked you officially, you are still both friends.
ReplyDeleteYou should also know real life is the real deal... forget how he is on social media.
My suggestion is let him be the one to come to you. Don’t make the mistake of going to him.. if he is serious, coming all the way to you won’t be a problem. When he does come through, if he’s going to be sleeping in a hotel, don’t spend the night with him. Go back to your house. Please go back to your house afterwards.
If you are worried about covid, practice social distancing and be with your sanitizer. Except you plan on kissing but you are very religious so I don’t think that would happen.
Take care.
Hmmm ... that online story, did the man not come to see her? Did they not meet in a hotel? Did she not say she was not spending the night? Poster, Pray!
DeleteMy dear that’s why I said she should not spend the night. While he’s lodged in a hotel, they could still do something else that dsnt involve her being in the room with him all day.
DeleteEverything isn’t about prayer alone. Preventive actions must be taken as well.
In my own opinion, you should wait till Covid19 is over before meeting him physically and also takes madam Stella advice.
ReplyDeleteJust chill abeg...Don't add to the number of cases already..Please be very careful
ReplyDeleteDo not be afraid of your diagnosis. It's a good thing he understands. With patience, doctors visit and prayers, you will have an enjoyable and fruitful sex life and marriage when that happens. It is good that you are a careful person and you should be with anyone whether you met them online or not. Give a few more weeks so he can completely recover. Protect your Mum and give him a chance if your instincts allow. I agree with Stella on letting people know where you are. Ideally the man should visit first but with the rigorous work hours in abroad it is also ok for the woman to visit first as long as you stay in a hotel/airbnb paid by you pls so there are no expectations. Goodluck!
ReplyDeleteVery mature and apt advice NIB.
DeleteI'm glad you corrected yourself on who visits first...dazol
DeleteMet online when? If you are not at peace about traveling I think you should hold on
ReplyDeleteWhen a man truly loves you, you would not stress yourself. He will be the one to stress himself. If it is a God ordained courtship that will of course end in marriage. It would come easy for you. For now Just stay away COVID 19 is not joking with the earth as we speak.
ReplyDeletePoster be very careful. Postpone your visit for now.
ReplyDeletePLEASE BE CAREFUL. And let two or more people know your whereabout.
ReplyDeleteLet him postpone it for now till the coast is clear, pls don't go visit ooo to avoid stories that touch the heart and tickle the bum bum, let him do the visit and met up with him in a hotel lobby, lounge and bar, you guys can do a catch up by going to beach and some sightseeing but pls DON'T GO 1ST
ReplyDeleteStella I like your advise but you see that lobby thing ehh! She will not spend 10hrs travelling just to go and hang out in the lobby neither would he do same. Poster is not even concerned about her security!!! Post my advise to you is don't make this trip yet. Maybe some other time but not in this crucial time.
ReplyDeleteit's very easy for you to say you will isolate after the visit but by the time you go and come back you will leave isolation and start doing "I cover my self with the blood of Jesus".
Stella call me 🤙
Hmmmmmmm
ReplyDeleteIt is well
Poster, I believe he will understand that both of you cannot visit each other this period. Not just because the corona is still raging but also mainly for your mom's health. If he doesn't understand that then he is not your man. You people could continue the discussion on video calls etc. Many families have been apart for about 4 months now so ..everyone is making sacrifices one way or the other. All the best.
ReplyDeletePoint of correction,he was never her man..😀😀runs outta post
DeleteI'm here to appreciate Stella for the data giveaway. I just saw it now.God bless you and replenish your pocket.
ReplyDeleteP.A.... Thank you for considering me.
If you can wait a little longer, please do butbif not, then take the neccessary covid-19 precaution.
ReplyDeleteSee him in an open place, also take it slow, get to Know him very very well before you let your gaurds down.
You see that part of understanding with you as per the no sex thing? My dear,its a lie. Dont believe that.
ReplyDeleteBut if hes worth all you wrote here,then give it a try. Do it with wisdom and utmost carefulness ok.
I concur 100% @first paragraph.
DeleteLet them kuku find themselves in room, she go hear am.
Wait untill after Covid 19. Then you can visit or he plan one.
ReplyDeleteIf he can't create time cos of his job, tell everyone where you are going to. Stay at a friend's place or lodge in a hotel. Just be careful sha.
I met my husband online too. Took a very big risk. It's the most dangerous and best decision of my life today. 9years and still counting.
Theres no after Covid...this thing is here for a long time, let her be careful like you said and broadcast to people where she dey go...lol.
DeleteUnu shirikwara ike oo, ndi online people.
If u turly love ur widow mum' dont risk.corona is not a joking matter oooo
ReplyDeleteIs good he visits you first so you can get to know him first to see if your spirit accepts him to avoid stories that touches the heart.
ReplyDeletePoster he should be the one to visit first then you will be able to examine him to know if you will go ahead with the relationship. Let it be in an open environment like an eatry or a hotel. All the best
ReplyDeletePoster, whatever decision you want to take , have your mother in mind because of her condition and also be security conscious...
ReplyDeletePoster abeg take seat sit down one place ooo. Why your hurry to go see man for this COVID-19 time? Continue online with him till the coast is clear? Remember your mother health ooo. Abi your cunt dey scratch you abeg scratch am back ooo. This is not time for love visits. COVID-19 dey follow sperm infect person oo.
ReplyDelete