STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
AT A CROSSROAD
Hi Stella,
I am a huge fan of your blog though i hardly comment.
To the issue at hand, i am 25 year old lady from the Northern state ( dad is nasarawa, mom is delta) i took my mum's complexion so most people don't believe i am from nasarawa. I am 25 years old.I started dating my first boyfriend late last year. Cause i was always scared of dating, my heart is too fragile.
On our first date, he told me he loved me, i begged him never to break my heart because he is my first. He promised to always love me.
I saw early signs that he might not be too serious.
Examples are: he hardly calls, we can be in the same town and won't see for 2 weeks, when i complain he will say, he is working hard for our future. He has never ever given me a gift before. I believe that lovers should always give each other gifts no matter how little, i have gotten his favourite chocolate for him before, cakes, smoothies . You know just nice gifts. Even on vals day i got him a customised pair of sandals. He got me nothing on vals day, even on my birthday he gave me nothing. Whenever i complain he says ,i should relax i am too worried.
Truth is i didnt want to push it because he has never raised his voice at me, and he treats me with kindness.
Anyways in the past 4 days we haven't spoken. Also did i mention my dad is a politician in the his state. This guy has been pressuring me to get a contract for him.
I guess that's why he liked me . I feel so hurt.
I want to end things,but i don't know if i am over reacting. He hasn't cheated yet, is hardworking, and kind.
I feel I'm at a crossroad. Please i need your help.
*My dear,you are not in a relationship with him from what you complained up there...There is no crossroad here,you dont have a boyfriend!!!
Na breeze full your head . Common dump dat marafacker.
ReplyDelete😂😀😂😀@breeze full your head.
DeleteHahahahahaha 😂 🤣 @BB
DeleteAs in poster, dump him with full force gidi nio and please I no Wan hear pim say you cry.. Na waste of tears o
Nawa o!
Delete@Blackey
DeleteBut why, why insult her. Teach her and fill her head with sense and not insults.
🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️
Wicked girl with your wicked funny responses🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
DeleteHer naivety is mind blowing, nne you still very single because this guy will break your already fragile heart with hammer and cut it with a knife.
You are really OYO , nothing is happening. He's in it for it , if you know what I mean. Run dear.
DeleteToday is supposed to be one of those fine days Stella was would have used that her slap... But NO! She had to spare you... Better take Stella's advice and move on very fast from that guy!
DeleteDon't mind BV's they can insult ehnn lolz but those insults are good sometimes for brain reset it has helped me. My dear that guy don't care about you he is just using you,not is so unfortunate that your first experience has yo be like this🤗🤗. Don't worry it gets better
DeleteThe guy wanna use you, delete and discard him asap.
DeleteEven if the boy comes back to beg you, buy gifts upon gifts, don't take him back. He's strategizing on the format to use, so that your father will see him as a good guy and thereby give him contract.
DeleteRun
Run🏃🏼
Hian.. .I was actually laughing at "na breeze full your head". Didnt see it like an insult. Anyways...different pple, different sense of humour.
DeletePoster please drop himmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, I was in a relationship like this before, guy man hardly call, if I complain he will say no need because he already know I am fine, for years I manage, thank God for delivering me 🤸♀️🤸♀️🤸♀️🤸♀️🤸♀️🤸♀️🤸♀️🤸♀️🤸♀️🤸♀️🤸♀️🤸♀️🤸♀️
DeletePoster u are in a relationship with urself. Simple!! Someone that see only contracts when he sees u. Dump the MF ASAP!!
DeletePoster...RUN!!!
DeleteBlackberry thanks for bringing laughter with your comments,more like empty head.
DeleteMy dear youre very much SINGLE.
DeleteAnd being single is nothing bad,u will find ur own man. This isnt it.
Is his name Chuks?I he is then sorry is your name. Just run.
DeleteBlackberry, ure damn funny. I don hear anoda one today "@ breeze full your head 🤣🤣😂😂😂😂"
DeletePlease make Jesus your first relationship and the rest will fall into place for your peace. 🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️
ReplyDeleteExactly!!! Sometimes I just don't understand why youths are chasing shadows when their maKer is being ignored or not taken seriously!!! May the Lord help us to understand in Jesus name.
DeleteHonestly, if you build your relationship with God, can hear him speak to you, lots of your problems and mistakes will be avoided. No man can trick you. I pray you get close to God to understand what true love is all about but for now DUMP that guy he doesn't love you AT ALL!!!
DeleteYou all have stated the truth and this is what I advice people uojnber than me
DeletePoster you are dating yourself. I pray the good Lord bless you with a good guy.
ReplyDeleteMadam treck away from that situationship.
DeleteYou deserve better.stop behaving like someone who lacks love and attention.
A good man will come your way.
I would have said dump him but you can't dump who you never had. You are not even his side chick not to talk of cheating on you. Overreacting ke? He won't even notice.
DeleteYou are an air-head and need to mature a bit more b4 trying a relationship again. I am sure you have slept with him which is why this situationship has become a project for you. It's natural but pick yourself up and face front. Don't even entertain him in the friend zone. Don't worry, take your time and don't be afraid of getting it wrong again. But this time, tie your legs for a while longer and let the man chase you.
HE IS A GOLD DIGGER.
ReplyDeleteYOU ARE EXTREMELY SINGLE.
BLOCK HIM. HE IS NICE BECAUSE OF WHAT HE HOPES TO GAIN FROM YOU. EVEN IF HE GETS YOU A GIFT, ALL NA FORMAT. IF HE ISN'T CALLING YOU, YOU ARE A SIDE CHICKEN
Gbam
DeleteHe is not even nice to her at all😂😂
DeleteGbamsolutely....
DeleteI totally agree with you 👌💯💯💯💯
DeleteGold digging Selfish Entitled Thieves roaming everywhere
DeleteGbamest!
DeleteStella you just said my mind. Poster you are obviously dating your self. Help him with that contract and watch him dump you like a piece of Rag. Move on pls!
ReplyDeleteSome of us need konk!!!! Women, you better end it! Match the energy you are being given. LET THEM CHASE YOU and if he's pushing you to get him a contract isn't that red alert? Please you are 25 don't make same mistakes most of us made. YouTube has so many self help contents to avoid you being confused like this. Take your L and Japa
ReplyDeleteLol@ konk
DeleteThis narrative is sooooo hilarious
I smell a user ... Don't worry true love will find you
ReplyDeleteThank you Stella, Poster you are in a relationship with yourself, quit been naive and cut this guy off completely if not that hurt you are running away from will be triple when he’s finished with you. RUN!!! There’s no need to think twice.
ReplyDelete(Note on your next )
Regular communication is a key ingredient in a relationship if it’s not there from the start, it’s dead on arrival.
When you break up with him, he will come and start forming lovey-dovey. All Na format o. Run!
DeletePray and God will send you the right person
DeletePoster that guy is just using you, wake up, you are not his girlfriend. Your own will come when you list expect it, just control ignore him.
ReplyDeletePoster call me 🤙
I don't even understand when she says, but he treats me with kindness... As in sexual kindness right? Please shed more light..
DeleteRun and fast. If you look back, you will turn into a bag of sand. Run.
ReplyDeleteNO! If she looks back she'll turn into a pillar of salt....
Delete😨😨😨😨 @ turning to sand and pillar of salt, una dooohhh ✊ ✊ ✊. As in , if she no run fast ehh , O Y O will be her case.
DeleteHe's using you. Emotionally he's unavailable. Dump him before he dumps you. When he finally realises he's lost you and comes back begging don't take him back. He's bad news. You're too obvious and he's seeing it that's why he's playing you like this. See the plenty things you've gotten him and dude has done nothing for you. Ahhh I no fit love this type abeg.
ReplyDeleteWalk way now to avoid writing another chronicle.
ReplyDeleteNne you are not crossing road anywhere... He is in your life because what he can gain from your dad(contract) not because he loves you... Simple truth.
ReplyDeleteYou dey mind her? She wan turn herself to Egungun wey wan cross express because of gold digger boy friend.
DeleteSee this one o 😂 hanty u get waffy blood b sharp na! U r dating urself !!! Asin YOURSELF
ReplyDeleteDarling he is not just into you..Please drop him like its hot..A guy that loves you will always want to give rather than take..You seem like a lady with a good head on her shoulder..Please don't waste your emotions on him at all.
ReplyDeleteI will advise that going forward, judge someone by his actions not by his word of mouth..When you meet a man, don't tell him please don't break my heart narration cos he will tell you what you want to hear..Be more calm, observant and discerning...All the best..
Your second paragraph is apt👍
DeleteThanks, Phoenix it is so obvious what he is all about. All the alarms in her head are going off.
DeletePoster. This is pathetic, despite the fact he wants something from you. He can't even pretend to like you. Simply Pretending to get what he wants is such a pain in his neck that you can easily see through his shenanigans. For a first-timer in relationship to see him for who he really is, then I put it to you that that man is obviously doing his barest minimum. You are still naive when it comes to the matter of the heart but even in your naive state you aren't impressed, then that should tell you what you need to know. You said he treats you with kindness but everything you wrote contradicts that. He doesn't treat you with kindness, my dear. He is a time-waster, a gold-digger and a gaslighter. I wonder how much effort it must have taken him before he comes over to see you or the number of times he must have rehearsed the sweet nothings he feeds you with to look convincing for you to still believe kindness is what he shows you except you have a different definition of kindness I am not privy to. A man who loves you will surely spoil you with gifts no matter how little. The gift apparently isn't the issue here but the thought fullness behind it shows he really cares. He doesn't like it as a human being nor wants you as a mere friend let alone his lover and his lackadaisical attitude concede to that fact. Kindly break it up without any explanation. Let him know his game is up.
Well said phoenix, She enter relationship with testimony.. Please don't break my heart blah blah blah. Alaye, you better learn from this one and enter into another relationship with a strong heart, don't allow anymore know your fears. Like phoenix said, be observant first and other things will fall in place.
DeleteI agree. Poster,you sound so sweet and naive. Don't waste your time with someone who doesn't make you happy. Why settle for all this headache? It's not a must you marry the first guy you date. No.
DeleteI'm very sure you might not even know how to break up with him. Once you tell him all the reasons why,he will promise heaven and Earth,change for a while and go back to factory setting. The truth is any smart guy will play you well to get what they want from you and your family. They will spoil you with gifts and call just to make you believe their false narrative. However,this guy is just unavailable. It might be a way of telling you to take a walk. If you draw his attention to it,he will begin to play you well.
On the otherside, perhaps he ain't bouyant. Is he working? How old is he? In fact there is no otherside,na contract him dey find. Hahahaha as if na like that ppl get contracts. Please let him go and focus well for the future.
*He doesn't like "you" as a human being*
DeleteSo Apt dear Phoenix.
DeleteMy dear, you have been saying yourself ooo.
ReplyDeleteThis guy has never been into you. All he wants is what he can get from you.
Pls leave him Asap.
With time your heart will forget him.
Even if he comes back begging or crying, don't be deceived. It's all to get a contract.
In your next relationship, pls don't be too forward, don't start with the gifts. The guy should. And since your dad is a politician, if your next boyfriend isn't aware, don't bring it up early in d relationship and if he is aware, ensure he is with you for you Nd not what to get.
Try also not to involve sex. You are naive, and you might be easily taken advantage off.
Very naive. Someone that a guy should be pampering and thanking God that he didn't meet a dragon or shark. Hmm....you meet a good girl that genuinely cares about you but your village ppl just wouldn't let your body calm down and act right.
DeletePoster,look deep down from within you and find the strength to put an end to this rubbish. Be firm with your decision. Let your no be no and then take a walk.
@Lade that is why I don't pity some guys........
Deletei love this blog
ReplyDeleteYou can say it again my lovely anon
Delete😂😂😂, Stella your comment made me laugh, dear poster don’t be scared to love, heartbreak is inevitable in life, just make sure you are getting the best of what you want in a relationship while it lasts, the man you described your there is scheming to make money from you hence his kindness and soft speaking to you, he doesn’t love you nor want you for keeps, the signs are glaring, just tell him the politician is your uncle not your father as you told him and watch his true color come out in full force.
ReplyDelete@Poster;you are the one in love here;the other one is strictly there for business..
ReplyDeleteGet him that contract and he would vamoose!!
The way men are programmed;They never have time,rather we make out time for anyone we are in "lust" with;not to talk of when a man is truly in love..
He is with you for the benefits;no man who loves a woman will stay three days without calling her even if she is the most annoying lady on earth..not to talk of two weeks..
Men are always all about how to impress their woman so she can stick with him;and if this your guy isn't doing so;he has another motive..
Kindly Submit your Cv to another heart for your own good.
@MARTINS
Exactly, the guy is strictly on business venture...
DeleteGBAM
DeleteHow many Hennessy do you want?
Poster run 🏃🏾♀️ 🏃🏾♀️🏃🏾♀️🏃🏾♀️🏃🏾♀️🏃🏾♀️🏃🏾♀️🏃🏾♀️🏃🏾♀️🏃🏾♀️🏃🏾♀️🏃🏾♀️🏃🏾♀️
ReplyDeleteUnku just want to use you shine and move to his target
ReplyDeletePlease my dear, you still so young and you sound it. Please exit the relationship for now and know his reaction if he's with for benefits
ReplyDeleteWarning sign: Don't ever be in a relationship with someone who is perfectly fine going days without talking to you ,RUN!,RUN,!!no confusion there,he is only using you, unfortunately many relationships are like this these days,both male and female are looking for where to reap,and it's even more nauseating when it's coming from the former,stay woke!!👀👀👀
ReplyDeleteFrom ur utterances, it's obvious u ain't pretty or having a good self esteem. First of all, u are not in any relationship, u are dating urself by urself for urself. Secondly, work on ur body and mindset,dnt be allowing random guys to mess u up as if he's doing u a favor
ReplyDeleteYour finishing line @ Martins is sooooo..... Nne you Don hear? The guy is Joke you better runnnnnnn.....
ReplyDeleteHe's not in love with you.. He's after you because of your father's connection.
ReplyDeleteThis one is not about building with a man. That guy will use you both emotionally and financially then dump you...
Dump him and face your life...
Na dem. My dear run without looking back. I was with one like that, no communication since we are modern ladies, we can call too. He will say he's busy, phone not allowed at his work. Valentine no msg,he didn't even remember my birthday forget gift. He will always make remarks about my father's money, how I should get him money to start business.
ReplyDeleteIf we are honest, there are always signs we just don't want to see them. I was considering my age and the fact that I left a relationship for him but I had to tell myself the hard truth and take a walk. A man that loves you will never leave you guessing. Leave that situationship today girl.
Please run🏃... I don't know why some people will be telling a guy "please don't break my heart". Of course, he will tell you what you want to hear. .
ReplyDeleteI think men should beg and seek for love from women they love. Poster, take note.
DeleteSis, it is obvious that the guy is not that into you. All he wants from you is the contract from your dad and any other thing he can take from you. The earlier you move on, the better for you.
ReplyDeleteYou dont have to force the relationship. It seems you are already so into him and come to think of it, he's your first like you claim. Seeing that he's showing no real commitment, it would be proper for you to leave your options open. Stop complaining, stop trying to make it work and open your mind to other people. This is a one sided relationship and not a relationship.
ReplyDeleteIt's not always fair that the right people end up with the wrong people and vise versa
ReplyDeleteAbi ooo. Life sha..........
DeletePoster come closer...
ReplyDeletePoster come closer
ReplyDeletePoster, your attention is needed here. Pls read the above comments from Kazmor
DeletePls how do u know he has never cheated
ReplyDeleteExactly
DeleteA guy claims he lovs u but won't call,see u or give u anything on ur birthday.. He only keeps calm because of wat u wants to get from u
ReplyDeleteAbeg that guy no get one single love for u poster,I bet u he has someone he loves dearly . u better end that fake relationship before u waste ur precious time
Like a gold digger I met on SnM. The signs are always there, men these days are really thirsty and desperately looking for professional women/rich kids to hook down with nothing to their own feather. Good riddance
ReplyDeletePoster that your boyfriend does not love you. He is only around you for what he can gain. Dust your self and leave that situationship. You deserve better...
ReplyDeleteMy dear poster please walk away 🏃🏃🏃🏃🏃, you are dating yourself
ReplyDeleteYou are dating yourself. That guy you think is your boyfriend is not dating you. He just wants to get what he can from you
ReplyDeletePlease poster leave the relationship now that it's still early so you won't be frustrated.
ReplyDeleteStella nack am for head: "KPAKAM"
ReplyDelete😅😅😅😅😅🤣🤣🤣
DeleteBabe, the only relationship that exists is in your head.
ReplyDeleteAs in your singleness ehn is with cane sef.
You don't dump this type. You ghost him and his generation,
ReplyDelete👌👌👌
DeleteYes ooo
DeleteAunty ask GOD to give you strength and wisdom
ReplyDeleteThere is no crossroad
Users everywhere
Run baby run .,, I was once in a relationship like this , I kept pushing and pushing maybe he will change but for where 😩... he delayed me for 8good years oh with nothing to write home about, he was even the reason I got married in my late twenties self , it’s always me , me , me all the time .., My dear Na so I side line am and face front jejelly oh !! God showed up and gave me the man of my dreams , married for years now n happy
ReplyDeleteBaby, can you ignore this man and move on with your life. How do you feel when people disrespect you. Please l don't like this type of story 😡😡😡😠😠😠.
ReplyDeleteDont call, don't fight don't quarrel .just silence and you will be cool. You are a project for him. Have fun and relax love will find you. Especially when you are rich
ReplyDeletePoster you are dating your selfooo, this guy is just with you because of what he feels he can achieve using you,please drop him like unwanted baggage.
ReplyDeleteSweetie, I think I know who you are. Does your name begin with F? Does his name begin with E? If yes, please read all the comments and use your head .I wish I could say more than this. Cheers .
ReplyDelete