The Public apology
Wednesday, June 03, 2020
Nigerian Man Apologises To The Lady He Assaulted After She Gave Him An Ultimatum
She accused him of touching her boobs at night and demanded for an apology five years later.............She got it!!!
The Public apology
The Public apology
93 comments:
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Hmmm,very good!!
ReplyDeleteI prophesy that there will soon be a massive call out of rapist and sex-offenders.No hiding place for them.
We can only hope that some ladies don't turn it to be vendettas against exes.
DeleteAt the end, it will turn to a child's play and rubbish the pains of the actual victims.
Amen!!
DeleteYes oh. Barr ikedi agunku, your sorrow shall be unending. God will take vengeance for me. I am grateful to God I am not terrible from it, but it has been used to bring ridicule to me.
DeleteSome guys like to say, after 20 years, yen yen yen, they don't know that's when the person was ready, got courage etc.
DeleteGuys you’ll be surprised this is common more than reported.
DeleteIn 2010 I got a dream job and went for training and induction with 24 others, it was a male dominated job, three blacks and just two females- I and one other white lady. In the course of training one day, a trainer grabbed my breasts in full view of my new colleagues and other trainers.
It’s been long and I can’t remember well now but I think I was just going to the front of the class to drop my papers when this elderly man just grabbed my boobs for no reason. Everybody was shocked and no, I wasn’t dressed provocatively as it’s was a uniformed job.
I got home and told my husband what happened and sadly, he indirectly blamed me even though I tried to explain I did nothing to warrant being sexually abused.
I realized I had no support should I decide to go ahead and to take up the case and even though I had almost 30 witnesses I still dropped the matter after the trainers all apologized on the man’s behalf and even sent the only other female to beg and explain that he will lose his source of income should I decide to pursue the matter. They also mandated the man to apologize which I accepted.
What kept me quiet was - I was just over two years in the uk then and didn’t really know the extent of my rights against any form of sexual harassment even though it was a new job and also the fact that my husband blamed me for the attack made me feel there was no point in raising dust as I will have no moral support which was very important. Unlike now I probably would have taken it up and make a good example out of him.
We have to stop the inclination of victim blaming and shaming. It has caused more harm and encouraged the molesters to continue their evil acts. May God keep us all from sexual predators male and female.
This is just one story, I was also molested by my boarding school physical education teacher , this man even had the guts to contact me on face book recently, and also by one of our former church top ministers.
Well I forgive them but please let’s encourage our kids to speak out and also listen when they complain about one uncle or aunty as we can never be too sure what’s going on
I heard my molester has gone mad so no need, he is paying already.
DeleteAnyone that just grabs my breast na beta slap he go receive, beta slap.
DeleteAbeg it haff do cos we Nigerians can overdo.
DeleteLadies that molested us as kids nko why don’t they speak up and tender apologies or are we too much for them to remember?
This is slowly becoming a Gender war and trust me it won’t end well.
Hi agadi, no one is stopping you from voicing yours just don’t turn it into something else by making some sneaky comments. Let people who feel hurt, pained and depressed speak up. Do not claim it’s a gender war. Let the men who have been molested also speak up.
Delete@anon 11:59 I feel oddly satisfied reading this. Normally, I have a phobia for madness. I usually feel a chill run down my spine when I hear that someone has gone mad. Oddly I feel joy now. This is justice!
DeleteReading/hearing about rape makes my skin crawl.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, nice of him to apologise.
Great. Good you called the animal out.
ReplyDeleteIt is our body and we have the right to allow or not.
No woman should allow her right to be trampled.
Animals in human form (men)
Please not all men OK...dont generalize it...remember you have a father,Uncles and brodas...nd the last tym i checked they are all men..#SayNoToRape
DeleteWomen rape rape or abuse boys too.
DeleteYes very nice of him to apologize....provided he's genuinely remorseful over the disgusting act of his....
DeleteWhy all this ,what of d male gender that has been abused on several occasions ,who is speaking up for them??
ReplyDeleteWomen always like placing themselves all the time as d most abused people on earth ,to gain self pity.
It is pathetic to see how male victims has been sidelined..
No one is stopping the male victims from telling their story.
DeleteYou can also place yourself and your fellow Male folks as the most abused people on earth to gain self pity..
DeleteStart the movement...shior
Everyone can speak up for themselves. Let the male guys speak up
DeleteDr Steve good morning please if you were abused go and call out your abuser and dont derail the point of this post
DeleteWho stopped the men for speaking up?
DeleteSo women should just shut up and sweep these issues under the carpet, move on like nothing happened? If only you understood as you clearly do not!
You're subtly silencing these women! STOP IT!
LET THE MEN SPEAk TOO IF WANT!
Nobody said the male folks shouldn't speak up, if anyone has stopped them, I haven't gotten the memo.
DeleteIf you are that worried, then be the change you want.
You can as well start a hashtag on social media for abused men/boys, it's that simple!!!
Do not trivialize this abeg.
Dr Steve,
DeleteIf you have a story by all means please tell it. This is the time for girls. Do not try to subdue this movement for protection of the girl child.
Wait your turn please.
Let them start speaking up too and it's a fact that woman generally are the most abused gender when it comes to sexual abuse, you should know this as a doctor. It's not about self pity.
DeleteThe male gender should speak out too! If they choose to remain silent, how will people speak for them?
DeleteNobody is sidelining anybody.
Say no to rape.
If you know any abused male advice him to speak up too and he will be defended.
DeleteThis has happened twice to me, the first at my mum's shop, he received two hot slaps from me.
The second was a family friend, i was too shocked to react, i just turned around and left, i I never told anyone, even ran into him last week.
Melancholy
You see my biggest problem with some of you MEN, you're asking why all this?? So women should now leave fighting for their rights/Freedom to start helping men call out their abusers for them?? Did women stop you guys from fighting for your rights or calling out your own abusers?? What exactly did women ever do to deserve some of you men? So Iphie should have left calling out her abuser to calling out the abusers of men?? Oo Chinekenna.
DeleteWhat is stoping men from speaking up?
DeleteThey also need to speak up. Too much silence has covered up this evil and it's perpetrators for far too long.
DeleteWhy not be their mouth piece.. Speak for them... Do you know any that has been molested or raped?
DeleteSPEAK UP FOR THE MALE GENDER IF YOU OR YOUR FRIENDS HAVE BEEN RAPED
DeleteDONT STIFFLE PEOPLE
PLACING THEMSELVES YOU SAY?
PRAY IT NEVER HAPPENS TO YOUR OWN CHILD YOU INSENSITIVE PRICK
A lot of men have taken sex forcefully from women in the past including the one married to me and its wrong!
Excuse me? This is not a gender war. The girl said she was molested and asked for an apology which the guy has given.
DeleteThe same way the females have been speaking out, the men should also. This is war against rape and molestation not war of the genders. You are the one making your inference.
Go online, you will find both men and women speaking up about their experiences and people applauding them for it.
It is the ones who speak out that we know of. Don't blame the ones speaking out if they are more women than men.
Remember the fight is against rapist, be it men or women. Stay on course!
Then they should speak out!!
DeleteYour long silence had made it seem nothing has been happening to ,"you".
But you mudt agree that the female specie suffer (rape,) most.. The women aren't going to do it for you. START NOW!!!
Dr Steve you're a rape apologist. Let the male rape victims speak out too. But this your defense of men folks is very weak.
DeleteWhy would you expect me to speak up for them when I was not present when the incident occurred? I'm not a witch dear.
DeleteThey should come out too and speak their truth and I promise I will listen and believe them. We are all free to speak our truth. Is that okay? ✌
Are you saying in addition to fighting our fight we should do same for the male too? You are not serious
DeleteYou know,I am really amazed seeing how I been lashed out for saying men also re victims of rape,for we not to speak out because nobody we believe our story..
DeleteAccording to statistics men suffer sexual molestations than the female folks..
A friend of mine,whom we worked in the same company said when he was still in junior class their was dis aunty that always play with him nd do buy him things,so it happened that one day dis said aunty took him to her palor nd start playing blue film,immediately the guy said he started having sex with d aunty..thats how d young dude was exposed to early sex..
My emphasis here is that d female folks is always puting d male folks in a bad light ,as the only offender of rape,whereas it is vice versa.
Pls rape is bad,not all men are rapist..seeing several advice online telling only d female folks dey should b careful how dey visit a man..speaks volume,DAT all men are a suspect
.which is my annoyance
God bless you Dr Steve
DeleteWomen will always want to embarrass men when in reality they are the filthiest in character.
Same people that would tell you I FORGIVE YOU in secret when you err would be the ones to still call you out once issue like that are being addressed in public just to garner sympathy.
I’ve noticed that CHISOM has this bitter attitude towards men and I wonder what would have been the cause but whatever it is I pray you get the closure you deserve.
For me, if I offend you and have begged you and you tell me it’s fine and years later you threaten me to apologize publicly just to get attention I’ll ignore you, deny your call out and sue your ass cos I’m damn sure there’d be no proof. Mtcheew
Dr Steve, the woman in questing didn’t rape your friend. He consented to it. First, he accepted her gifts Which put him in an uncompromising situation. He Probably felt he needed to secure his job. He had the option of walking out when the blue film came on. He wasn’t raped judging by your story.
DeleteYou derailed in your last paragraph by inserting all men are not rapist. I’m sorry to say, I do not know how that opinion came about but That is not the topic in view and I do not believe all men are rapists.
Like I replied to Agadi 👆🏿, if you have been abused, please speak up. Do not hold back bc it will only make you more miserable and prolly turn you into bitter person which after a while, it will start manifesting in your actions. Men should also speak up so they can be helped and feel liberated. No more playing , BE A MAN and suck it up. The Society (of men) has put that onus on the male gender and it’s obviously no longer working as there are a lot of feelings being held back. It’s time the male gender stops letting the society tell them what to do and start doing what is right for them.
Stella please post my reply to agadi n'elinsii.
DeleteSteve, quote the source of these"statistics" .
DeleteIphie did not call out men, she called out her abuser and he did not deny it. Other men spoke up for her since they don't molest women. If you summersaulted into the conclusion that men were in any way indicted by this post, you have a lot in common with the molester and should have a rethink.
@Dr Steve where did you get your statistics from. Please share a link if possible. All over the world females experience sexual violence more than men. Do you even know what rape is? Rape is when there is no consent (or withdrawal of consent) and when force is used. From the story you gave us, was either the case? You are a balancer. Is anyone stopping you and male rape victims from speaking up? Please park well jor.
DeleteNice move
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeletePls advice people not to hide such.The church can not come under fire becos a PA to the pastor raped. come on
DeleteHmmmmmm sorry about your experience. If you feel speaking further about it will help you find absolute closure, please do. Those telling you ‘for the sake of the church‘ are evil. The body of Christ won’t do that to anyone.
DeletePlease call him out, tell your dad..He may still be raping people continuously..
DeleteUnusual Amy please go back to that church and expose him. What if he's doing it to someone else?
DeletePlease blast the bastard.
Bebe,I’m so sorry you experienced such but please do the needful. Who cares about the church? Think of damage he might still be doing out there, his next victim might not be as strong as you are.
DeletePlease don’t protect such lunatic. I pray for total healing for you, you are lifted.
Please spill by all means, you will be protecting vulnerable girls in that church.
DeleteRapists don't deserve to be hidden, they deserve judgement.
God will heal you from the pain permanently. Stay strong.
DeleteMay God heal you completely Love🤗🤗❤. Its good you have forgiven him, but hope the rapist has repented sha?
DeleteSome of this rapist, if they are not called out and punished, they'll never stop. Especially this one that's hiding in the church
Na you Sabi, if you don't want to expose the evil man, then it's all on you. So you think you are his only victim?? The wicked soul might be going about raping other victims who would also be too scared to spill for the sake of church.
DeleteIf you still feel a certain way call him out
DeleteYou're endangering another woman's life by not calling out the rapist!
DeleteThere's nothing like for the sake of the church.
Emotions and sentiment is what is destroying Nigeria and Nigerians.
My dear, it hurts but please expose him. Those who said for the church sake, you should let it go, if you were their child, would they give that same advise?? Please, expose him, don't let him get away.
DeleteMy dear, you don't need to be ashamed. It's them that should hide their faces in disgrace...
DeleteTell your father about it and know the way forward...
Abeeeg call out that evil PA. I'm very sure he's still hiding under the church cover to be perpetrating atrocities. Call him out now to save the next innocent girl.
DeleteIf some of you were God eh problem for dey.
DeleteHmmm this rape is very alarming and our constitution is very vague on this rape/Sexual assault issues..I think we need to push our senators to look into the rape issue instead of thinking about how to gag the masses from free expression..Please women and men lets raise our boys in the proper manner and prepare them for life..Pampering them and focusing on the girl only does not work...Sexual harrassment starts from Cat- calls for me...Boys of 18years, 19 years will just approach you and be trying to chyke you violently..We need to do better..Please stop telling or asking ladies if they dress well or not..That is why you are a man not an Oke Mkpi..Please!!
ReplyDeleteYou will hear things like, i like my woman mature, i date mature women, with their immature manhood. The guts
DeleteAlmost every lady has a thing or more to say about molestation and abuse because they've experienced it.
DeleteI think a bill was brought up before the house , either senate or house of rep. What ever happened to that bill
DeleteThose in power that are supposed to make laws that will protect victims & jail rapist are apologists. They're as guilty as rapists themselves, they'll never make that law & if anyone pushes the bill, it'll never see the light of the day. No be naija again?
DeleteGood.
ReplyDeleteAwww😍😍😍
ReplyDeleteSuch a nice move👌
Some men would prefer to die than apologize to a woman...
Their ego is something else #smh
It is well 🙏
Thank GOD he apologized but since he said he have apologized before ,why bring it up again . 🤷
ReplyDeleteDrama everywhere mtchew
ReplyDelete😂😂😂, kaii, I love this mehh!! And that Benenth Joseph Obinna is my kind of person, he ended his writeup with, "daluu" lol.
ReplyDeleteGood good, now he's supporting the #GirlChild??? Because an abused girl child was brave enough to call him out publicly,of course with the right authorities backing her up. So that is how he and his fruen/roommate molest and maybe team up to abuse girls oriaa?? See ehh, all you evil men, your days are numbered.
This is very good. Please forgive him and sincerely move on
ReplyDeleteVery good.
ReplyDeleteI am a victim of rape and abuse. Still healing. God help us.
ReplyDelete🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗 you will be fine
DeleteThis #SAYNORAPE has really exposed most naija men. A lot of them see it as normal thing. They said struggling to have to sex is normal thing for naija. I'm sick in my tummy.
ReplyDeleteGood!! Say no to rape.💔
ReplyDeleteGood to know he apologized, hopefully this gives her the needed closure
ReplyDeleteGood. The right way to go... Let them know it's not business as usual...
ReplyDeleteVery good.au are a man indeed
ReplyDeleteBravo👍👍
ReplyDeleteNo one(male/female) deserves to be touched without their consents.
I remember, while growing up, I just finished secondary school and didn't gain admission immediately. I decided to get a job to fend for myself.
I got a job in a hotel, as a waitress. One of the evenings, while serving some group of guys, as I had dropped their orders and turned to go inside, one of the guys squeezed and smacked my ass and made a very nasty comment.
His friends supported him as they laughed along with him.
I was livid with anger so I hit this head and back with the plastic tray I had with me.
He didn't see it coming.
I turned and walked away.
I went straight into our changing room and pulled my uniform as I prepared to leave.
I knew I will be sacked as I overheard him shouting and telling my supervisor how rude I was. That one was already apologizing to him.
I got informed by one of my friends, who also worked there, that I shouldn't step into the premises ever.
I wasn't paid either, as it was almost the end of the month.
I felt bad though, as I needed the money then but I never regretted my action.
Such scenario still plays out in most hotels and restaurants. It's so wrong!
I'm very proud of you.
DeleteYou have done well my dear
DeleteYou made me so proud! I admire your courage at that young age. You are a strong woman
DeleteI was disvirgined through rape. I trusted this guy but he did it anyway. The experience scares me everytime I think of it. I've moved on but the flashes come sometimes. It was so painful, I begged him to stop, it was so painful and I bled for days. Never reported him but when ever I come across his name on Facebook the resentment I feel. It is well.
ReplyDelete90% of rape cases re people close to you.
Very sorry dear .🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗 You will be fine
DeleteI am solo sorry 😭🤗
DeleteOk forgive and move on.
ReplyDeleteDear youth, to avoid being call out like this always maintain social distances whenever you are with an opposite sex expect your slibings, even after the pandemic is over.
Remember this key word "SOCIAL DISTANCES ". The society is taking a new shape with the help of social media.
You ladies are really the reason rape issue are losing value as capital offence. How can we be talking about a girl that was raped and murdered in the church and someone is talking about healing from touching of her boobs. Some will even come to talk about how they followed a strange guy to night club and ended up sleeping in his house, blablahblah....
ReplyDeleteI can never support rape but I think is a time girls stop mixing the serious issues of those genuine violent rape cases with minor sex issues they have with a guy because when you continue doing that, it reduces the capital crime status of rape.
That is why oyibo has sex offender by level. Level 1, 2,3 just to differentiate it. But here, all this wild dumb girls be putting themselves in compromising positions and still be shouting is my body and equating the situation to a girl that was raped and murdered in the church where she is reading.
Rape is bad and evil but pls girls, stop using your misdemeanor to reduce the value of the pain of genuine rape victims.
Nothing gives any molester or rapist the right to another person's body
Deleteam really sick with this rape thing..if u people like # tag every thing dont be surprised that those that rape all this girls are not on social media's....
ReplyDeleteA close friend in the University put marijuana in my food and said it was thyme. I later fell asleep at his place. He kept calling my name, I guess to see if I was deep asleep. I answered everytime he called. Either he lost his nerves or I wasn't knocked out as he wanted. But he didn't touch me. He told me he was going out so I had to leave. I did not suspect anything until much later when I almost ran mad. Told my street smart friend who told be he must have put igbo in the food. I also remembered his neighbors smoked it a lot. I confronted him and he denied. I did not have proof so what could I do?
ReplyDeleteFunny thing is I remained friends with him, until we left school. Then it really dawned on me what evil intentions he must have had...before I cut him off. He kept trying to reconnect but I was too hurt, plus he never apologized or admitted.
I thought about calling him out but haven't. I've forgiven him for my peace of mind. Should I call him out?
Yes you should, he is a rapist on the prowl, some girls must have fallen victim to his evil act. You would save other girls by calling him out.
DeleteNo don't call him out please. He planned to rape but he didn't, just let it go.
Delete