Former Beauty Queen Regina Askia Explains To Her Teen Son Rudi Jnr Why She Divorced His Father Rudi Snr

Former Beauty queen and former actress,Regina Askia (who is now a Registered Nurse in the US) took out time to explain to her son why she and his dad are no longer together, she also spoke to him about his Nigerian roots.....

The Conversation goes thus..........


Son: How did you and dad get divorced?


Regina : It was a very rough patch in our relationship because your dad was not really invested in the relationship. He wanted to be where he wanted to be. And it was not what I signed up for. We had quarrels, fights and some things that take real time to forget and forgive. So we decided to separate and go our different ways.


Son: You kinda told me you guys had issues, were they domestic ones like domestic violence?


Regina: That was a large part , I'm not gonna lie about that, we fought a lot, physically and verbally, even emotionally and then he resorted to using his hands and I cut him down with my mouth. Things didn't go well and the children were caught up in the middle. It wasn't a good family situation. So we separated.
But you see even through our separation, your father was always coming over, he was always there. (She laughs) You were always complaining that he was not in your life enough. You said he always comes, sees you and then he leaves.


Son: He does


Regina : Does that bother you? 

Son: No, I actually like it.


Regina : Why ?cos you used to complain.


Son: Other kids had really present fathers who picked them up from school. He used to come and buy gifts, but he doesn't do that anymore. I think I should probably ask him more questions.


Regina: Like what?


Son: How to pick up hot chics ?(Regina playfully hits him and asks "Isn't it disrespectful to sit in front of your mum and ask your dad questions on how to pick up hot chics? )


Son: No.


Regina : Don't you know I am supposed to be the one and only hot chic in your dad's life?


Son: You know you had boyfriends when you weren't dating daddy.


Regina : So for the same reasons your dad won't be able to give you tips on how to pick up hot chics.


Son: Why not?


Regina : That was a long time ago and he has forgotten. I just wished you had a closer relationship with your father, but then unfortunately we separated when you were just a baby and even when you grew through that, you don't seem interested in wanting to spend time with him (her son interrupts)


Son: These jokes are just really stale, you know.


Regina : He works and there is so much you can learn from your father. Your father can take a house apart and put it back together. He is into computers and even though he is old school, you can take his old school knowledge and put it in the new school. Your father is a great resource for you, but you guys don't seem to see it, and you don't care.
 If I get posted to Africa, would you come with me? Because when you come to Africa, you would get a different perception of how the man...


Son: I am so sorry, but I really don't want to go to Africa. I might die and I really don't want to get in there. I know it sounds cold minded for me to say, but I am not interested in your culture whatsoever.


Regina : That is your culture, and it's the only place in the world where you'll be treated as a first class citizen, recognized as a man in your own right and your own standard. Believe me. I don't want to poison your mind, but I want you to realise the reality of being a black man in America. You have to jump 
through hoops in order to prove yourself.......
In this culture, this American culture, we will forever be second class citizens.

You know what they call "White Privilege", ask Google "what is White Privilege?"

I don't want to poison your mind, but I would like you to know the reality of being a black man in America. We have to jump through hoops of fire and prove ourselves beyond any reasonable doubt, capabilities and beyond questions before we can get half as much, I kid you not.
So get out there, get your A-game on.


Son: I can go to anywhere but Africa.


Regina : And after you have travelled and experienced how the world treats black people, nobody is gonna tell you to go back and get your house in order. My only concern is while you are learning, stay alive and position yourself on a level where people will respect you.
Your father tried his best, he doesn't want to come to Africa too.

*Nice conversation!!...Always let your kids hear it from you first and always tell them the truth.