Please if you belong to the uneducated class of women,this post is not to bring you down and if you belong to the class of educated women,this post is not to blow your trumpet,we just need to discuss why some men will not go near one of both classes......
Some men have a phobia with women who went to school and believe they take their I-too-knowism into their matrimonial home and do not respect their men,these ones go for women who are not schooled and think these ones are the best.
Some men have a phobia for unschooled women and argue that they bring nothing to the table and when the chips are down,they become toxic with their lack of knowledge....
Do we have any men here? What is your view concerning this?
Marrying an unschooled woman is better than marrying an unschooled man. If you are educated as a woman, pls marry an educated man. I will wait for the uneducated male post before I tell my story.
ReplyDeleteEducated men should marry educated women and vice versa.
ReplyDeleteWho will now be helping kids with their homework if illiterate marries illiterate? 😂😂😂😂😂😂
DeleteLol @14:08.
DeleteIf i were a man,i can go for any. Some are unschooled but always eager to learn. While some are educated illiterates.
There's no one size fits all in matters of the heart,just go for your peace.
Anonymous 14:08 they will employ someone who will be doing that for the children. Money is very important to those set of people to help them.
DeleteMarry your class. Marry your class. Marry your class.
DeleteBoth of you can then decide to go to school together or blissfully wallow in mutual ignorance.
You will just get a brain drain if you marry some uneducated people. Conversation na war. Inferiority complex becomess the 3rd person in your marriage. You can't even joke and have a good laugh in peace.
Sapphire.. you just stated a fact here.
Delete@Sapphire, you said it all.
DeleteI left my UK public school educated exposed and sophisticated Yoruba boyfriend because he had too many women after him. I'm not Yoruba and I wanted to avoid future stories that touch. I now met this quiet gentle Ibo guy. When I saw that he did not know how to surf the net I was shocked. In 2016!!! But I felt it was no big deal so I taught him. He hated socialising with my friends because of insecurities. So many areas where I was clearly more advanced than him. Inferiority complex from him and his family caused so many issues. They accused him of looking down on them because he formed healthy eating habits and wasn't able to eat certain foods. Or drinking beer everyday. They wanted us to inform them of our weekend outings so they could come along. When he stopped going to betting agents and started an online course I paid for they said I was trying to take him away from them.
In the end I could not handle the pointless animosity.
Imagine your sis in law feeling insulted because you used basic English words that she did not understand. Or your mum in law angry because she did not understand that food allergies can kill and your hubby saying you should just eat the food and go to the hospital afterwards.
To me being educated is being able to read and write amd speak well... to me it doesn't matter, what matters to me is the financial independence of the woman, her ability to bring something to the table. I can marry a woman with a good stable business even if she didnt attend school
ReplyDeleteHope you are also well off financially and can also bring something good to the table too? If not ,you are a gold digger. Broke men have no business expecting women to bring something to the table
DeleteNa them! Financial independence slap you there! Gold digger!
DeleteWhat is so offensive in his comment? Marriage is the coming together of two wholes. Both should be financially independent.
DeleteBare faced gold digger.
DeleteThere’s no way one would discuss and not blow their trumpet. It’s not easy to be educated 😉
ReplyDeleteMen who have phobia for educated women lack confidence.
They don’t want someone who’d stand up to them on all levels. They are the oppressors.
Education gives you exposure, broader knowledge etc and you can’t hide the benefits.
See them creeping out and somebody will see this traits and still walk in to a ticking time bomb with his eyes open.
DeleteSlutty biko get off your high horse cos you ain’t all that.
Why is sluttys comment paining you? She's not all that yet you came to comment under her. You will forever remain beneath her.
DeleteAnon 14:37
DeleteQue se passe-t-il ici?
She hasn't said anything mauvais here.
Calm down okay ? 😘
I ain’t all that? Lol honey, I’m all of that and more.
DeleteYou're right on this @Slutty
DeleteAnon 14:37, Slutty had not lied tho.
DeleteThere's this story of an uneducated Carpenter who married a doctor. He earned less than her and tried to stamp his authority and ignorance on the poor woman. It was an arranged marriage in a particular church I wouldn't want to mention the name....
ReplyDeleteThe marriage was a disaster.
Please, marry in your class to avoid stories that touch
That marriage can never work,both mentality are different.
DeleteYour last paragraph says it all.
DeleteIt also shows that the doctor is an educated-illiterate. How can a medical doctor accept to marry an illetrate carpenter or do you mean Professional Furniture maker who has built a business in wood works e.g Bedmate Furnitures,HKN,Lifemate,Woodstyles etc?
DeleteIt's either..
1. The doctor did not graduate as a medical doctor.
2. The doctor did not graduate as a medical doctor.
3.The doctor did not graduate as a medical doctor.
The marriage already failed before it was contracted.
Am even angry with the claimed doctor.
#LOVE😍
The Called, I hope ure not a lady and reach the age when ure desperate and all you want is just a man so you can settle down and quickly have kids then ul understand what the Doctor went through especially when Church leaders have intervened and you expect the best out of the relationship.
DeleteWhich kine yeye church leaders. So they'll tell you to jump into fire and you'll do it all cuz she's not married at a certain age. God forbid I use my hands to buy frustration and trouble for myself.
Delete@the called, you know damned well that our society elevates marriage for women above any other thing she could achieve in life. So a woman in spite of her status and exposure will be conditioned to tumble several levels down in her quest to satisfy societal pressure. If Oprah were African she would be ridiculed.
DeleteLadies are always accused of being too much, doing too much, being told that no one will want or marry them if they aim towards the highest--education, promotions, etc. I encourage every lady to do the best she can to better herself, to strive to the peak, to aim for the best.
ReplyDeleteOnly an insecure man who wants to exert his dominance will prefer a woman to not be her best. We hear men say to ambitious women all the time, "I get your type for house", meaning that they know a woman who is worth her salt, and take pleasure in subduing her because they are threatened by her. They say that and smile because they believe that women are born and raised solely to cater to their every whim.
Its 2020 and no woman should be uneducated simply because she's a woman. Every woman should undergo basic education up to high school, and if she so wishes, up to university level. Women, you are not more attractive being just an ornament to make the man look good. Your brain is attractive too. Use it and be the very best you can be and if any man tells you different, tell him to shift himself and his insecurities to the aside and strut past him with your head raised so high.
That "I get your type for house" is all shades of annoying. Most times it comes from stark illiterate men that ain't worth shit. Imagine my sis once had a little misunderstanding with an illiterate taxi and he told her "I get your type for house" she looked at him and looked at his scrap of a car and told him that if he has got her type, he wouldn't be in this condition. I laughed so hard. It was funny cos my sister has her own neat ride and she is CEO of her own company.
DeleteWhen they tell me that, I look them in the eye and tell them it's their type they have.
DeleteWhen i was single, my then security man said it to me. I brought down hell with the estate management that night and he was replaced.
Delete👏👏👏👏 Mystique and Saphire, you are beautiful and full of wisdom. Ride on. Be happy.
DeleteSapphire are Ife? Just asking?
Delete@chielo, Saphire is married, Ife is not.
DeleteLove is all that matters.like the saying goes "we find love in hopeless places" Because most of decided to ignore love and look for who meets up to our imaginary list of the ideal. is the reason for most problems today.
ReplyDeleteMarry your level please.
ReplyDeleteYour type dey Shiloh Dey cry to God for just any man. Stop thinking too highly of yourself.
DeleteWho amongst you here can talk nonsense to Bishop of Ichida or Arthur Eze of Ukpo and just so you know these men ain’t so lettered.
No one is crying in Shiloh just for any man. People are there praying for the kind of man they want. That’s why there are so many divorces nowadays. Marry any how person and the marriage doesn’t last 90% ofthe time.
DeleteAnon 14:40 I can tell you are the type that will make someone miserable being married to you already because you don’t want your partner to know their worth and it shows low self esteem on your part. Nobody should ever have to think less of themselves or settle for less just to get married. If you are good person,doing well and looking the part then set realistic but very good standards for your self and to hell with what myopic people think
DeleteAnon 14.40,please that you're not lettered doesn't mean you should force others into your category! Prince Arthur Eze is an engineer who studied abroad decades ago. The man had a very sound education please!
DeleteNow you can go and continue crying at Shiloh!...
Shut up your mouth you liar@Mama Mia.
DeleteWhich Arthur Eze schooled abroad🤣🤣🤣🤣...Nne I know the Eze’s family to their kitchen in Ukpo so quit the lies.
Even his kids all schooled in UNN so quit this fallacy biko.
Yes his kids schooled in UNN . Tou are right
DeleteIf you are educated and love her,send her to school.
ReplyDeleteIf you are educated and want to marry educated, go for her .
Go for your level and spec to avoid misunderstanding and argument.
Odi ka odi kpo ba ,o di ka o di e go lu.
Stella the question would have been ,Will you marry Educated person or non educated, so I can read BVs own choice of view
Gbam! Okwu gi kwuoto ka cigar!
DeleteThe most important thing is to marry a woman that gives you peace of mind, whether illiterate o, semi illiterate or educated. Just marry a good woman
ReplyDeleteUnschooled woman literally means an illiterate woman, please, are there still such women in 2020? Like, women who have never seen the four walls of primary and secondary school etc... please, I'm not talking about older women here, I am talking about women in their twenties and even thirties.
ReplyDeleteIf a man choose to marry an unschooled woman, he should be ready to assist her and encouraging her to attending adult school of learning, reading and writing.
It is important that every human should be able to read and write in 2020.
Unschooled men are worse than schooled ones though.
P.S. there are different kinds of Education.
Some schooled men are actually worse than unschooled men o. Educated people with illiterate mentalities full market. We have this expectation that education changes a person for the better or makes them enlightened. This is an ideal. Some people only read to get degrees, not to open their minds or challenge their worldviews. They are small/narrow-minded. So while their educational level changed, their backward, oppressive, insensitive, prejudiced mentality remained. I have worked with Ph.D holders that put education to shame with their way of reasoning. I think the important thing is a person's character.
DeleteI totally agree with you Anonymous 18:24
DeletePersonally I would start from defining education as the transformation of the mind. If you can analyse, process and understand basic things, then to me you are educated.I say this, because many are going to schools, up to tertiary levels but are they truly educated?
ReplyDeleteSo its better to marry according your understanding of education I.e For me someone who can understand and speak fluently, can make logical conclusions and can be a basic solution provider, kpali or not.
Most men who say they can't marry an educated woman or a graduate do so cause they feel they can't control a well educated woman, also cause most educated women know their rights & won't allow themselves to be abused/maltreated by any man. Normally, an educated woman is independent & not so submissive too.
ReplyDeleteMost of such men just have insecurities when it comes to educated women. As for me, l don't care how many PhDs you have or if you are a secondarian, l seek better qualities in women and this ain't one of them. How about how kind you are? How humane you are? How much of a beautiful soul you have? God fearing? Your character etc? Can you bring my kids up in the way of the Lord and instill good morals in them? These and many more are way more important for mua 👌
You lie sir because most of the ADMIN HIDE MY ID I know are graduates and undergraduates so my dear I don’t think going to school makes you understand your rights. It all boils down to being smart, teachable and having self confidence in knowing your worth.
DeleteAgadi, education is supposed to make you know you know your right. If you attended a university and don't know your right, then you are not educated. As you can see, l also used the term well educated. Check the well educated women on this blog for instance and you'll see that they know their rights.
DeleteKnowing your right is one thing. Having the courage to fight for it is another. Not all educational systems teach people their rights though. How many of us graduated from university knowing the constitution? I don't remember anyone telling me my constitutional rights as a Nigerian or a woman in school. What I learned about my rights came from conversations with my sisters who are lawyers and stories in the media. I just learned that as a woman I can also bail people. Police said I couldn't before. Some educated women tolerate plenty in their marriages sometimes because they really don't know their rights under the law (because religion and tradition is what we follow and believe) or they know, but don't have the courage and support to fight for it. Notice that when Nigerian women go abroad and know there is a system that supports their rights, they go ahead. But since we look at these women from the eyes of tradition and religion, we say they are bad women. Aye ma le!
Deletesome people are educated and yet not exposed.
ReplyDeleteif I were man,I will marry an educated and exposed lady.
someone who passed through school and not the other way round.
bv tenth
@anonymous 13:15.
DeleteNot all that went to school are exposed.
I have a brother that could make it to higher institution because of his love for business.
I don't think some of educated ones can stand him if you meet him.
His own intelligent is gifted and not what one learn from school.
His business has take him to many part of the world that some educated ones haven't reached.
If you see him speak ,act or write ,you will be curious to know the school he graduated from and the his qualification.
What does it matter? Find you a partner that you are equally yoked with. Education does not make a good wife/husband.
ReplyDeleteThere are few things in life that can tell you instantly if you are making good choices tho eg Education, career path, stability in current job and good morals.
Na so. As you are now,can you marry an uneducated man?
Delete14:34 With BV Olodo Sapiosexual's definition of education, i can say Yes!
DeleteWell, there are some men and women who are educated but still have archaic reasoning that you begin to wonder if they were learned or had any exposure to start with. But still, it's best to marry someone who understands the value of education just like you, else instead of your partner being your biggest cheerleader and motivating you to be better they clip your wings or kill your dream.
ReplyDeleteI don't really think there is much difference between an uneducated woman and an educated woman other than the certificate, I think the most important thing is marry someone that has sense and someone who can hold a conversation.
ReplyDeleteIgnorance is bliss indeed 😂😂😂😂 did I hear u say just certificate? Nah real wah for u
DeleteFor me ,I think I can marry an uneducated man if he has sense and money . being educated is different from having sense .some educated men and their over sense irritates me sometimes .
ReplyDeleteThis reminds me of husband's of Lagos ,that movie is good.
As an educated woman at PHD level, I can never marry a non educated man.
ReplyDeleteHow do we even converse, can he accompany me to work and business conference without me been embrassed?
Our level of understanding and communication will be very different. It doesn't matter whether he is wealthy or not as I am also wealthy, I will rather be single and adopt a child than marry an uneducated man.
I have seen experiences, these types of relationships never last.
You’ve not seen men who ain’t so educated that speaks very well, have good command of the public and have better packaging?
DeleteAunty life na as you take package yourself and education is just the icing on the cake.
An educated woman at PhD level but, you still do not know when and how to use "been" and "being" ekelekwam gi
DeleteThere are so many educated men/women that can't write properly.
DeletePackaging is good oh, but when you're under pressure, when life happens, the real you must show.
DeleteLife is a process. Even if one can't achieve higher education, pls keep working on your self. Up grade your mindset by reading.
I know this post is for men but I have a relative who married a man whose highest achievement is SSCE. He found out my family was rich and got her pregnant. Now she is a genius and very intelligent so you can imagine the incompatibility of it all coupled with the fact the guy lied that he worked in a bank but he actually was a security guard at the bank. He never paid her bride price (she did), money that was collected to help him was spent on flexing and carrying other women up and down. She is presently the bread winner to the extent of buying credit and loading his phone and yet he won't call her. Made her collect loans and put her in debt. He has never paid school fees for his 3kids since they were born and yet she is STILL there.
ReplyDeleteFor me I have always known that I will not settle for less. I'm sapiosexual...atleast have some semblance of intelligence. Being educated does not guarantee common sense abeg. I met a guy older than me, fine physically and rich but he was dummbbbb and I couldn't cope. Till today he thinks I left him for sth else cos I never told him why.
My two cents sha
For you to know all this details about your cousins family then I feel she’s also part of the problem in that marriage😒😒😒
DeleteAnd I hope you know that there are PhD holders who are also deadbeat fathers and Lazy as fuck?
Agadi nwanyi a, I never said she was a cousin 🙄. She was pushed into that situation and has refused to come out despite the situation. She is NOT the problem.
DeleteAND I was talking about a situation in aware of and not whatever example you brought up there.
15:47, Agadi meant that your relative that is spilling what is going on inside her marriage to you guys contributed to the woes with her mouth
DeleteNa so. As you are now,can you marry an uneducated man?
ReplyDeleteAnon 14.21 like I said , education does not guarantee intelligence. Bill Gates is a drop out and Dangote did not go to a University. I believe you have some semblance of common sense to figure that out. 😒
DeleteAnon 15.55, Dangote had his university education in Egypt please...
Delete@ Mama Mia still not the point...seriously y'all need to read ...sheesh😒🙄
DeleteAnon, while I'm reading, you could at least take correction! It's not so difficult to do is it?...
DeleteStella don't forget that there are educated dummies, with PhD yet nothing to show for it. just go for a sharp and smart individual.who has a goal in life.
ReplyDelete👌👌👌
DeleteThere is NO way you are a dummy if you studied for a phd successfully. Doctorate is not beans!
DeleteTrue. Doctorate is not beans👌
DeleteMaybe Paprika is referring to the ‘bought’ doctorate which is available in some corrupt institutions.
DeleteNeither. good Character is the prerequisite for
ReplyDeletea good wife/husband.
You don't learn Character from School,
you learn it from following God's Word.
Education does not prevent a person from
adultery, rituals, domestic violence, stealing etc., does it?
The fear of God keep a person from all these.
Please marry your level, there is alteady enough wahala to contend with in marriage.
ReplyDeleteExcept the Educated woman decides to bring down her Ego and has a cool head I’d go for an unschooled one that has a good head and mould her to my taste.
ReplyDeleteImagine as a man getting married to someone like Perxian that would always want to correct your grammar it would just cause depression for you. No pun intended oh
Agadi, Perxian is trying her best not to correct grammar or spellings, but when she does it comes from a place of love.
DeleteIt's not easy to ignore what you know very well.
Agadi, I love your new blog name / I'D, it's on point 👍🌹
You're welcome to sdkbv family.
Educated men can marry an uneducated woman as he can go as far as supporting her education and the woman will have no issue if he wants to further his education. She will not see it as belittling that her husband is more educated than her.
ReplyDeleteHowever, the reverse is not the case. The average Nigerian man has a lot of ego so an uneducated man may not be able to handle it if married to an educated woman, especially if the man is poor. He will show little or no support if the educated lady wants to further her education as he isn't experiencing the value of education. Too many examples of such marriages either ending or becoming toxic because of this.
The exception mostly occurs when the uneducated man is rich. Such men (common among the igbos) desire educated women either to add value to their business or to be a role model for their children. Sometimes, such men marry an uneducated woman, then sponsor her education.
I wouldn't advice an educated woman to marry an uneducated man. The Nigerian factor should not be ignored even if such a man appears to be God fearing. He's still human. Before you marry one that will use religion or misapply the bible to destroy your potential.
It all balls down to individual compatibility, striking a balance is key no matter how educated either of them is. No be by school oh as them still de see uneducated literate.
ReplyDeleteBoils down*
DeleteAn uneducated woman is lil better.
ReplyDeleteOf-course.
DeleteEnter your comment...as for me,I didn't go to school so my future wife must be an illiterate.
ReplyDeleteif you can read, write, communicate to people that is what matter and i see it as what is more important.
ReplyDeleteMy guy has HND and his babe told him two years ago that she can't marry a graduate from polytechnic because she had 2.1 in BSc.
ReplyDeleteToday, they both work in the same organisation tho in different states but same graduate salary.
A girl once said on this blog that she cannot marry a polytechnic graduate, HND or OND. I hope she have changed that mentality now as most industry employees are 80% polytechnic graduates at tech, supervisor and operations level in almost every sector now.
Personally, I will advise you marry someone who can read, write, speaks, is teachable and willing to succeed in business, career or profession after all other compatibility factors are well checked.
Don't go and marry a well learned person if u have low or poverty mentality.
PhD can marry BSc
PhD can marry BSc
PhD can marry HND
PhD can marry OND
PhD can marry NCE
PhD can marry TC2
PhD can marry SSCE Holder with good handiwork or Trader with a clause to further education after marriage.
Msc can marry: All higher degrees,Msc BSc, HND, OND, OD, NCE, TC2, SSCE Handwork or Trader(with further education in view).
BSc and HND can marry: All higher Degrees, OND, TC2, NCE, SSCE Tradesmen or Trader, and government worker with Pry6 cert.
OND, NCE, TC2, SSCE: Can marry all higher degrees and all Pry6 including successful trader dropouts.
Pry 6, Business, Handiwork men and women: Can marry any class if they know they are already successful in their u are jusbusiness. If u are just ok tradesmen or business Pry6 holder, try and look for ur mate or a slightly higher person.
The major problems happens when a non graduate and non brilliant business person, handiwork or just poor person marries a 1st or 2nd class Bsc/HND, MSC or PhD graduate.
@Osmoses.
I think it best to marry a man or woman is enlightened, especially when u are very enlightened. Folks who are not enlightened are the problem of this world. Not every educated person is enlightened. Being educated and being enlightened are two different things.
ReplyDeleteTo me this rubbish talk. As a parent don't you want your daughter to go to school?. So why should you decide because an educated woman is smart then she should not get married. I am even surprised this type of topic is still being discussed in this modern times. If a man cannot marry a wife based on compatibility and choosing a life partner based on her educational status then there is no need for him to get married please. Such a man would frustrate his wife.
ReplyDeleteTo me education is relative.
ReplyDeleteYou mustn't go through the four walls of a formal setting (though the basics is required ,isprimary which is Primary 1-6
Who says you must go to High School or Uni? With the basic educational foundation if someone opens his/herself to knowledge,exposure,travelling,acquiring of hard or soft skills, he/she will come out better and successful.
Look at the high rate of e uneducated-educated people we have in Nigeria
If you meet someone with a mindset that is open to unlearn,learn and relearn,please marry.
DDont sit there waiting for a graduate,an enlightened mindset is better than an educated person.
It's on this blog that we see archaic and traditional graduates,they acquired education but it didn't affect their mindsets or world view. They hold on to prehistoric and blunt ideologies. Homocrudes.
Ndii
" Otu odi ugbua
Ka oga adigide
we rue ngbe ebighi ebi"
TRANSLATION
As it is now
So shall it be
Till eternity
We see them everyday even on SDK and SM both male and female,huband and wives,youth and matured people. Some of them are even our siblings and relatives. You see them unyielding, narcissistic,subjugatibg,manipulative,self-driven,dominating etc
So be wise, understand what education means so that "PALI" does not become your deciding factor.
So go ahead and marry.
For someone like myself even if I didn't go to Uni or High I would still have come out like this if not better cause this mindset of ' na beco I no go school" has kept a lot of people in chains of non-productivity..
So Uncle marry her if she has a sound mind + vision + character. Same goes for Aunty.
But of course she/he can get some certifications or finish up High School/Uni later if you and her/him so desire.
#LOVE😍
I once dated a guy dat was an SSCE holder while I was a graduate,I was in my mid twenties and he was in his late thirties,he had a contract job with LNG,he spoke well,I mean very well,u would never know he he wasn't a graduate but any little misunderstanding d next thing u will hear is...is it becos I didn't go to school,is becos u r graduate,and things like dat...when I finally left him due to A LOT of reasons and met someone else,d first thing he asked me is if he was a graduate....d last time we spoke he still single 4 years later and he said he was dating a medical doctor but d lady wanted to be d man in d relationship,he's almost 45 but I think he intimidated by educated and intelligent women ..
ReplyDeleteMarry whoever you are compatible with,be it educated or illiterate
ReplyDeleteSome women are graduates but complete olodo!They can't speak or write good sentences and theirs kids inherit the unintelligence or low IQ.
ReplyDeleteWhile some women who were not opportuned to go to school speak well and their kids intelligent too cos the mother have that gene of intelligence.So its the kids one should be concerned about when choosing a life partner and not academic qualification of the woman.
Go figure the 7 types of intelligence that makes up human intelligence, one can be a graduate and be as dumb as sh**t. Whether you have a higher education or not everyone should at least try to improve on there IQ, having the basic skills of reading and writing is enough to put on the path of endless learning opportunities, if you can't speak English, learn.. Why am I ranting? I have seen Men who are no graduates, yet intelligent and married to professional women, without feeling insecure, why because both of them can have intelligent conversations, so having a degree especially in Africa is overblown, having said that, some so called Nigerian graduates can't even speak or write fluently what a shame!
ReplyDeleteUneducated men are easily intimidated,i hung out with one and the experience was appalling.It can never happen again biko.
ReplyDelete#Fancy
I once dated a lady who was barely literate, and for an educated person like me, it was hard conversing with her. Education affects the thought-process. I would say one thing then, and she will mis-interprete what I said. I had to break down what I said to pidgin english for her to understand me, and it was very frustrating.
ReplyDeletemarrying an educated or uneducated woman is cool as long as you guys can communicate and have mutual goals. each has pros and cons. safe to say non is better than the other. instead, check for he kind of mentality they have.
ReplyDeleteMe...I go prefer to marry person who know pass me, so that anything wey I no know she go teach me
ReplyDelete