STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
HASTY DECISION OR NOT
Hi Stella,
How are you doing? Please help me post this before I take a rash decision.
I met a guy about a month ago and we started dating. He's a manager at an insurance firm and he's always busy.
We've had s#x twice now and the s#x was good.
He's not stingy as we've gone out several times and he always foots the bill. I couldn't help out because I have not been paid at where I'm working, cos I just started working this month. I don't have much at the moment and I don't ask of anything from him, because I feel the relationship is still new and I do not want him to think I'm all for the money.
I saw him on Sunday this week and I've started noticing little things about him since that day.
One, he doesn't call as he used to anymore. No text messages either. He only calls back when I call him or gives me one call throughout the day. Whether I pick the call or not, he doesn't attempt calling back.
Two, we usually hang out regularly especially on Mondays. But on Monday, he said he wanted to study for his upcoming exams, which I accepted with no qualms. Yesterday, he went to his friend's birthday party of which I wasn't aware of, even though we spoke the previous night. I called and called but he didn't pick.
He said he left his phone in the car and stayed out very late.
I just have bad vibes around the whole thing. I have a problem with trust as I've been heartbroken by people I loved and I decided not to love anyone anymore, until I met him.
I plan on not calling him or picking his call again. I am thinking of walking away from this relationship before it gets too serious. I really like him but I don't want a relationship where I would be unhappy.
Am I being too hasty with this decision?
Thanks.
*My dear make you wear shoe waka cos it looks like you are dating yourself now..its either he just wanted to sleep with or he has realised you are a financial burden....He definitely does not love you cos of his behaviour..
My dear,make you waka oooh.......
When men get what they want in a r/ship,that's the end o ooo except the marriage is from heaven. Stop forcing yourself on him. It won't be easy as you've already had sex but when next you find urself in another r/ship,don't open the cookie jar. Do t you learn from ANG and others from this blog?
ReplyDeleteI have learnt and still learning from this blog. God bless Stella ooooop
Move ok darling. Listen to your intuition unless he’s proves to you that he is worthy.
DeleteWhy does a woman feel used after being dumped by a guy after sex? Is it not both of them that enjoyed it? 🙄
DeleteListen to yourself, the guy promised a rel but changed after. Thats why you feel dumped. If guy talks to a girl, sisi lets have fun. Then its diff case
DeleteDarling the writing is on the wall Mene Mene Seke Mene..You guys had sex and it was good..So he is not just into you..Try to move on ok..The love you seek will find you..Secondly stop carrying ''I want a relationship on your face''. Smile more, link with your girlfriends, have fun..When you meet a guy, remove marriage or relationship just be friends with them..Besides you said you guys just met a month ago, dont you think its too early for a commitment..Go with the flow..Any man that wants you will go for you, you dont need to chase him..Just be yourself ok..All the best..
DeleteY'all just assume the guy enjoyed the sex, did he tell you that? Man wey enjoy sex will not bail like that... he'd stick around & chop more.
DeleteGirls should know tha having sex with a guy on a first day or after 100yrs doesn’t change anything,but you did change it. I know some will say he has slept with you so he has gotten what he wants. A lot of women on this blog will also agree with me that they had sex with their boy friend cum husband 1st day or within the week. I am a guy and I will tell you girls something about guys. Sex is bond in a relationship that is why no matter how a husband and wife fight at home,they most settle after sex,so sex is a strong tool, but guys need more than sex, after the sex the real connection starts. Sorry to say,you may have started acting funny to him too or like Stella said he may have seen you as a liability. Sex brings out the real us as humans ,sometging you say or do after the sex bond determine if the relationship go on or breaks . It’s nature my dear,the same way you found him worthy of sleeping with is the same way you have to prove that you are for keeps. Few tips: carry your self well, have self confidence,speak intelligently( o dear lord a lot of them a dumb)that will make him confide in you for things,dress with class(according to how he likes his woman). I have some more to give but as I be guy make I no let out all our secrets so pretenders no go take advantage.
DeletePoster, you know most times, it takes up to 6 months to get to know someone. Maybe not inside out but, at least to understand him/her. In barely a month of knowing each other, you both have "known" each other. Don't you think you underpriced yourself?
DeletePlease, move on. You made a mistake, lesson learnt and stop using your body as dessert for any man!...
No relationship starts very serious ,unless na arrangement marriage.just as it’s not all guys you date that you want to marry that is how it’s not all girls guys sleep With they most marry. Most girl feel as long as they have pussy they are good for marriage or as long as you have slept with them you must marry them.keep ur head up after sex and build what you have, I will tell you that a lot of guy will say,when I met my wife I dint know she was the one, I was not even sending her ,but as time goes on I started to realize she was different from the others. Make your self different from the others sex or no sex. All girls have pussy,so give what others don’t have.Sex is not everything in a relationship but it’s a glue that one most apply very well so it doesn’t fall off.you can keep anyman with good sex
DeleteMy dear take a walk ASAP. He's not into you at all. He never felt anything for you other than sex and you fell woefully. Sorry, you were damn too fast giving your self to him, though it works for some but fails for majority, my opinion though.
DeleteMight have a serious relationship or married (distance marriage). Men will always be men. Kpele
Mama mia, you say "Dessert"??
DeleteNo dear, that was the appetizer.
One thing that makes a man lose interest in a woman after sex, usually after the second sex (the second sex is to confirm if it really smells), is because of vaginal odour. We guys dont say this, but I tell you, it is a very important factor. Many ladies smell down there without knowing. You dont know how happy most men are whenever they come across a lady with a sweet smelling cookie. In fact, even if he is not that into her, he will be around for a long time just because of that.
DeleteShe said the sex was good, I guess to her. Most of the men you think dont last long, quickly ejaculate because of bad smell and never gives head. Ladies, please I BEG YOU, take care of your cookie. Many husbands are suffering in silence because there wife smells bad. I also wish men can be bold enough to tell their women this truth.
I have met beautiful classy ladies that smells badly and I just wonder if they dont know? Like how come they dont even know? And this is not just a Nigerian women thing, even foreign women of other race. That smell you think is normal, my dear, is not. A good smell, stays with you for long after sex, in fact most men never forget a good smell and would definitely want to have more and more.
I wish Stella loud this. Most women are still unmarried because of this. Some men dont even know how the real smell is because all women they have met smell same fishy way, so they just think is normal. JUST SAYING
Poster you have borderline personality disorder so you feel insecured and want to walk away when you get scared you will be dumped. Try and read about bpd and how to cope with it or you will keep second guessing yourself
Deleteanny 23:17
Deletewhich one is boardeline personality dusorder? when did you administer test or do clinical interview? please try not to use terms you don't fully understand.
Poster, he Isn't just into you. move on hun. when the relationship is right it flows and you would even feel God's hands in it. There wont mind games or stress like these.
lastly, work on yoir trust issues so you can enjoy your marriage when it come
Just 30days of meeting, you don off pant twice, that was the only decision i can say you made in a hurry.
ReplyDeleteIs it your pant? Some of you here are behaving like the man is the only one than enjoyed the sex. Mtcheww. Give your advises and stop being judgemental.
DeleteI disagree with you Mr Macbeth. There's nothing wrong with that. There's also absolutely nothing wrong with meeting a man and having sex the same day as long as you don't sustain unshared expectations. If you guys just meet and decide to fuck, it's cool as long as the both of you have no partners. Problems only arise when one person feels a relationship has been established as a result of said fuck when it was just a one-off to the other person. There must be clear-cut mutual agreement that a relationship is being started. The most recurring mistake a lot of women make is to assume sex kick-starts a relationship. Many women might not really like a man, but just because they "mistakenly" had sex , she feels she should just go into a "relationship" with him so that it doesn't look as if she's "cheap". That is why alot of them are dating themselves.
DeleteY'all are the ones that said it doesn't matter, why berating her for the same thing!!!
DeletePoster, if you're not comfortable with his behavior, just move on and don't ever feel bad about the sex.......
Some people f*** each other on their first dates and still marry themselves. The guy obviously hasn't found the kind of qualities he is looking for in the poster. So my advice to her is to detach the feelings ASAP
DeletePoster I agree with Macbeth. Obviously sex matters to you. So move on and in future close your legs.
DeleteLiz and we see the outcome of such marriages. A guy that cannot RESTRAIN himself BEFORE marriage will not do so after marriage.
DeleteDon't you think you are choking him already? Give him some space.
ReplyDeleteYou want him to be on phone 24/7 with you? He works, he has exams to prepare for and other engagements to attend to.
You too, focus on other things.
If you are having bad vibes, let him be then.
You can always get someone else.
Sluttychic.
I don't mean to be harsh but he don chop clean mouth, waka. You will find someone else, love exists my dear. Relationship takes 2 and not just 1 person.
DeleteAll the best.
He only wanted your cookies. Madam move on ok. We all have fall into that little trick before.
DeleteHim dun chop clean mouth so move on.
ReplyDeleteI don't understand. She too no chop? She said it was good meaning she enjoyed it so they both chopped each other. All I see is that poster expected too much and the guy is obviously doesn't have too much to give (I don't mean money too). Dey your dey if he calls you fine and if he doesn't don't disturb him. Move on. Too early to be too attached. Face your work too.
DeleteSeems you are dating yourself my dear, what's up with men and inconsistency? Nawa oo
DeleteKiks, i’m so tired of this dumb double standard. She literally wrote that the sex was amazing so how is he the one that chopped?
Delete@Tbabe :He done chop clean mouth?so as your husband chop why him no clean mouth waka? You don’t know that guys too also regret having sex to some girls? Especially the ones that don’t have brains,talk any how and form watin them no be, that was how a girl came to my house and was brushing her teeth with my swan bottle water ,swan o that is expensive and the tap was running water. After that na to order for food morning and night claiming she likes Chinese like say na Chinese her papa and mama take feed her grow. I even get house help o,she would have asked if she can tell the help what to do or send the house help to the market so she cooks something special for me. That would have made a big difference. Mumu no do, so because she fuck and I gave her money for hair and nails I Must marry her?
DeleteMany women are more emotionally invested in sex than men. They do it mostly to please, rather than because they are ready for it at said time. So even if she enjoyed it at the end of the day, she would still feel cheated if she was more emotionally invested or not ready to give it. Poster the guy don chop commot. Move on and be wiser next time.
DeleteHe may also be married.
ReplyDeleteThis is a huge possibility. Also, something of one month, is it a relationship? You people have just been chilling biko.
DeleteWell, you can keep your distance for a few days and see if he tries to reach out to you. If he doesn't, walk.
The pussy wasnt a bomb one, this could be another.
DeleteYea, take a step back and see if he will take one forward. If not, he's not that into you. The earlier u can figure this out, the better
ReplyDeleteStep back? Na go be that oh
DeleteStart adjusting accordingly . Don't feel like he used you because you both enjoyed it but I will say stop giving too much energy to it. Whatever energy he is giving, Match it don't over do anything and make yourself scarce. Be also ready to lose him it's when you show too much interest they will make you feel like they are doing you a favour. Match their energy whatever they give you, give x5
ReplyDeleteBoth enjoyed wetin? Did he tell you he did?
DeleteI could be wrong but i think the guy is taking this rather casually and like you said, it’s not too serious.
ReplyDeleteDon’t invest your emotions yet. If you want something serious then i suggest you take that walk cos this ain’t it.
Hey Perxian boo,good afternoon.
DeleteTbaibay, how are you? Saw your late comment about trials, hope you are coping fine in that lockdown? Keep yo head up, b. 🤗
DeleteThank you. You're the first person that has a sensible comment. Poster, there is nothing, absolutely nothing wrong with you.
DeleteIt's the dude that's out to deceive you and you fell for it. Next time, wise up.
And no, you're not a financial liability.
Men pay for dates and more. Ask them, they'll tell you. Dont mind these comments. A man in love will leave you with zero doubts
He has slept with you and that's it. Make up your mind for the worst.
ReplyDeleteand she didn't sleep with him? Smh.
DeleteGuy don chop.
DeleteMy question to you is have you spoken to him about it?
ReplyDeleteDont rush into making decision just talk to him about it first from there you will know where you stand and how much you mean to him.
Trust me by talking to him you will definitely see the signs you are looking for.
What if he refuses to talk
DeleteNice one big Banty... Always ask questions before concluding...
DeleteIt'll save you a lot of heart aches and stress.
If the guy doesn't come clean it's his loss... Love yourself more Mr right will find you😘😘
Seems you dont know men and lies are like 5 and 6
Deletebig Banty is absolutely right...assumptions are dangerous in relationships, you need to calm down ask him what is going on and then listen to the unspoken words while he is talking, you know what i mean read between the lines babe, its not easy to start a relationship a lot of assumptions going up and down and its usually a relationship killer.
DeleteActions speak way louder than words.
DeleteMove on. You invested emotions on someone who wanted just sex.
ReplyDeleteBE A FEMALE VERSION OF THE MAN YOU HOPE TO DATE/MARRY.
DeleteDONT LOOK FOR LOVE WHEN YOU ARE NOT FINANCIALLY STABLE OR EMOTIONALLY AVAILABLE.
Thank God for mercy or some people will never marry.
DeletePoster you are not taking any hasty decision, the better you walk away from that relationship the better for you.
ReplyDeleteSleep with a guy you met in less than a month?
ReplyDeleteJeez with this attitude, you will get played a lot.
A responsible guy should be scared of you too.
Please work on yourself before starting another relationship.
As for me, I don't do that blanking thing I will call and ask you point blank if you are done. Call him and tell him all you said here, ogini di? Why can't we ladies be able to speak plainly to men we are in relationship with?
Again, hold the cookie a bit longer before serving it abeg
If she sleeps with him even after 5 years without her bride price being paid,
Deleteit is still fornication.
He has gotten what he came for. Ladies no matter how horny you feel, at least date a guy for six months minimum three months before allowing him to taste the cookie jar. I am not an advocate for Fornication though, no matter how much you try to paint it it is still Fornication and a sin.
ReplyDeleteStella has already advised you. Move on and learn your lessons from this incident. It is well with you.
6 months?
DeleteThey wont agree oh, just very few hold on for just 3months, ure talking of 6.
Having sex with the guy was nothing, he's just an irresponsible person.
DeleteYou guys lay too much empathises on sex too much .
With or without sex, if he was going to stay, he would have stayed.
Even if we date for 12years without it, if that's what he guy wants, he'll leave after tasting it!!
DeleteIt's not a big deal...... Do whatever works for you, no manual to these things!!
Don na lie oh.
DeleteHavent you fucked an ugly girl with sweet pussy before? You dont want to date her but the fuck keeps you hooked. Hvnt you?
You think a guy that wants that coochie by all means won't wait that 6 months for it and still leave when he gets it???
DeleteThere's no manual for this thing. The only thing I hate is getting upset that u slept with him. Get mad that he broke up with u and not because you had sex with him.
Cookie, Rosie's message is not for ALL. It's applicable only for true Christians who know fornication is a sin. It is a big deal.
DeleteAfter 6months and he come waka,you go do another six months with another guy and him waka, before you know it you will be 100 years but have had sex 10 times in a life time, as you be sex trial.
DeleteWaiting 6 months to open cookie doesn't mean anything. Some guys can wait for as long as possible just to eat the cookie, once they chop, they clean mouth and leave. Some guys are that crazy.
DeleteNo be chop and dump (for dumpster) be this? 😮😮
ReplyDeleteNne, you meet a (?loaded) dude, spread legs begin supply forks aghara aghara ..."and the sex was good" okwa ya?
Dude don chop na, clean mouth, wear shoes and take off -chikina. 🤷🏻♀️
"And I don't want him to know that I am there for the money?" Really?
Sisi, you are there for the money and he is there for the forks. Period. QED.
You seem not to have learnt any lesson from "heartbreaks" you said you have passed through.
As long as you keep spreading legs for dudes, na so them go dey treat you like thrash can.
If you give yourself some respite, some sober reflection, some dignity by changing your ways and making Jesus your Lord, you will find peace.
This thing I read above, no be the fallouts of a life lived outside Christ?
Wetin my Sisis dey learn for this blog bikonu eh?
I will always say it that it is easier to seek Christ, study your Scriptures, pray and fast and find all
these things the world run after. Instead of trusting dudes with your chastity in a tumbo tumbo way and getting scattered.
😘😘
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂Mama ANG has come again...
DeleteThis is simple truth, though blunt.
DeleteI don't always like ANG but what sh said is the pure truth. One month and you call that a relationship??? NO ringy no dingy end of.
DeleteYou met him a month ago and have already had sex twice?My dear,just find your way out because he came for the sex and you have given him so quickly without even holding back to see if he is serious with you.And what is all these hanging out and birthday party gist?are you people not scared of corona virus?For people that will say eh,even if you give him much later in the relationship,he will still leave if he wants to.But at least,you wont feel so used and cheap.1month is to soon to have sex please.
ReplyDeleteMaybe the chronicle was sent in way before Corona. As for the sex, she clearly enjoyed it so what’s with the used and cheap tags?
DeletePls let him be! If it's meant to be, it will.
ReplyDeleteI think he's those type of people that will start noticing you when you stop giving him attention. He will start texting and calling back when he noticed you moved on
You have already given him kpekus just one month of dating. The guyman has eaten and cleaned mouth. What else remain?
ReplyDelete'm sorry poster but the guy Isn't in love with you...imaging this kind of attitude just at one month of relationship? its too early. The initial "garagara" is not even there.
ReplyDeleteIf he calls, pick, dont be all over him or berate him for not calling. Just be very casual as if he means nothing to u. it will be better if you do the ghosting o, cos it seems he has eaten belleful. Don't be like a hurting girlfriend, in fact DO NOT GIVE A DAMN, to me d guy was just having fun.
ReplyDeleteExactly. Reduce ur calls to him too. If he really likes you and just has genuine excuse for his behaviour, he will step up, if not, just know say u never see husband
DeleteGhost him,don't explain anything
ReplyDeleteMy dear sister, the truth is that ,that guy just wanted to sleep with you, and you were fast enough to to give him what he wanted.
ReplyDeleteForgodsake, had sex not even once, but twice within one month!!!!
Ladies please let's have some self respect and dignity.
Please waka, cos this one na chop and clean mouth😣
Since you've had sex with him, he's already got what he wants. Count your teeth with your tongue and move on with your life.
ReplyDeleteHe only wanted one thing and he has had it twice. If he really wants to be with you, he’ll surely make out time. Forget the flimsy excuse and don’t call him anymore. I know it will be difficult but try please.
ReplyDeletePls next time try not to sleep with a guy so early in the relationship, as for this one, delete him from your mind
ReplyDeleteI think its quite obvious that the dude isn't interested any more, maybe he never really was.
ReplyDeleteIf you really like him then I suggest you should have a talk with him and just tell him how you honestly feel about his nonchalance and hear what he has to say for himself.
Or you could just jejely walk away.
how do i get a blog ID...Martins please help. thank you
ReplyDeleteAsk google that questiom
DeleteLol,vanish as fast as you can.
ReplyDeleteIsn't it obvious you are dating yourself?
ReplyDeletePoster I will say don't call but pick when he calls. Take him off your mind too, unless you begin to see changes.
ReplyDeleteHe is done. If you stay to talk stories with him, trust me he will string you on for a few more weeks, have more sex and still take a walk.
ReplyDeleteZero him in your mind and take a walk.
No need to invest emotions sis,ure clearly dating urself.a guy that’s crazy in love with u,u will know from his actions,he will be the one calling to hear from u,and always want to be around u it’s clear he wanted just sex.Dont let the sex be loud ur sense of reasoning biko take a walk.be in charge of ur emotions if he wants something serious he will come back then u make ur conditions clear to him.wish u happiness 👍
ReplyDeletePoster it seems the wanted the cookie,that was his plan.But you can discuss with him one on one on how you feel,if he still act the same you can move on
ReplyDeletelololol. he doesn't call but call u back when u do, that's a gentleman (the smooth operator kind).
ReplyDeletehere's a poem for you;
you are cheap
cheap things enslaves
he's feeling enslaved by your cheapness.
I tire for some girls sef.
Move on sis,if he is not reciprocating the love.I was once in this situation ship.gave him everything,cooking and cleaning but still he no send me.I just carry my broken heart waka.I cried but time heals.
ReplyDeleteMy dear,please give yourself brain,I made this mistake once and M still paying the prize,i had sex with someone i just started dating and boom pregnancy entered,after keeping myself all this time,guess what,he left me,even with the pregnancy,am still in pains but i am trusting God for divine healing nd i know God has forgiven me and i know He will restore all i have lost
ReplyDeletePains from the abortion? I dont understand.
DeleteIt is well with you ,God will see you through
DeleteHa, all I see is "met a month ago and had sex twice" as in 2 good times! Abeg call me old fashioned but this is all shades of wrong. Fornication is still a sin oh.
ReplyDeletesometimes we guys don't jus come for the s*x but when it comes too quickly especially if the guy is on the responsible side, he begins to second guess the whole relationship idea with the girl.
ReplyDeleteso it's not all abt him don lamba n wan run. this s*x thing clouds judgement.
some of u might say I had s*x with my husband second day n we married 15yrs n counting. believe he seen what u cud offer other than the s*x. this poster I think only has watery p*ssy to offer n guyman wants more.
SixFeeta
One man's meat is another man's poison. So the fact that this guy can't appreciate the poster does not mean that another guy won't.
DeleteAs much as i'm not in support of pre
ReplyDeletemarital sex i feel having sex with the guy after a month of meeting him shouldn't be a determinant of whether the relationship will hold or not. I ll use my self as an example. My ex broke up with me two years ago and I was so broken nd miserable but I eventually moved on.I was celebate for about a year and some months although I planned staying off sex totally but it wasn't easy at all.I met my nw boyfriend two yrs ago while working with his company then he asked me out after some month and I agreed. The day he came over to my place then I made up my mind that nothing like sex was going to happen btw us bt we eventually ad sex dat night. Do I feel bad? No,i made up my mind dat I wasn't going to put all my mind in the relationship and also take everyday as it comes. I didn't call him the following week to see if he was only after the sex bt guess what he called me nd asked if he offended me. We clocked a yr last month and we are thinking of settling down after my service year. I suggest the poster call him to ask if anything is wrong nd not just assume he is ghosting u.
You dunno the holy nwejes on this blog have a manual for a successful relationship.
DeleteLike they didn't read the chronicle of a virgin having issues with her marriage on this same blog.
Eka, are you a Christian or not? Maybe just a church goer sha, Nigerians are known to be religious.
DeleteNo true Christian will be defending pre-maritsl sex. Newsflash: God's standards do not change.
Anon 17.58 these people are not defending premarital sex. They are saying that a man that sees more than sex in you will stay and act right, regardless of if you had sex on the first date. Yes, having sex is fornication. But it takes more than sex or the lack thereof to hook a guy.
DeleteI also believe that the timing of sex can make or mar a relationship, but mostly if you play it cool like anon 15:44 just did, the guy will still continue chasing. On the other hand if you have early sex and you begin to act like a girlfriend after that, the man begins to think that you gave him sex to lure him into a relationship and you are desperate (forgetting that he wanted the sex more than you and probably ‘pressured’ you into it). Men are funny.
And also to add...
DeleteThe reason why even non-christians have the 90 day rule of withholding the cookie is to allow the man to invest his time and emotions so he can see the woman as more than just ‘sex’. This is not to say it’s fool-proof but it betters the woman’s chances even if it’s just a little
I have noticed that in most cases before a ‘reasonable’ woman sleeps with a man, in her mind she has already decided that he’s someone she can date long term. However for men it is different, if you allow him have sex the first minute, it is after the sex that he will put on his thinking cap and begin to think whether or not he can actually date you. And if it so happens that he doesn’t see any reason to be with you other than mediocre sex, best believe he will leave.
AdaBekee, are you a Christian? Yes or No?
DeleteMove on. He is not into you.
ReplyDeleteMy guy is tired of you, can't you see that ni ? So you need us to tell you that there's now relationship again abi ?
ReplyDelete🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
"I am thinking of walking away from this relationship before it gets too serious." Don't worry, sweetie, it will never get too serious because dude has already checked out emotionally and, by the look of things, physically. You can't get in too deep when it's only one person doing the heavy lifting.
ReplyDeleteDarling, don't you think you moved too fast? You met a guy you know little or nothing about and within a month's period, you've had sex twice, you felt the sex was good? Apparently not good enough to pique his interest. You didn't allow him have the pleasure of the chase. You stated that you have had your heart broken by people you've loved. Can it be that this is a vicious cycle? Do you always get intimate too fast? If yes, you probably should try slowing things down. Get to know a guy well enough before you allow him have access to your most valued treasure.
True, there are a few ladies who get hot and heavy on the first date and they are still with or married to the same guy. Make no mistake, they are the anomaly, the exception to the "rule". As a lady, if you spend time getting to know a guy, you will notice some red flags even before you get too far. It's easier to walk away from a guy whom you haven't had dalliance with. Not all ladies are wired to have sex and move on like nothing happened. Maybe if you had sex and you ignored him like nothing happened, he MAY be the one blowing up your phone with calls because he wouldn't see that coming. When you get intimate without first forming an emotional connection, nothing tethers him to you. If the sex is mind blowing, he will return for more but still go about searching for that emotional connection.
You stated you guy are dating, did he ask you out or you just assumed he is your boyfriend because you've had sex and gone on several dates? Darling, a guy who wants you wouldn't mind spending on you. That you couldn't split some of the bills shouldn't even come up at this stage. He should be all over you and want to hear from you as often as possible. Don't you know the intoxicating effects of a new relationship? Just a month and he is already treating you like an option? It appears whatever you had going on has run its course. You will do well to end this and move on with whatever is left of your dignity. If you find yourself chasing a man instead of the other way around, it's a very safe presumption that you are in the wrong relationship.
e-hugs and kisses.
Don’t I just love you Ronalda? So aptly put.
DeleteWell said Ronalda
DeleteKING XOXO MYSTERY
Thank you Ronalda!
DeleteThank you Ronaldo, don't mind them loose fellows who open their cookie at the blink of an eye, move on poster for you acted too cheap.
DeleteUse reverse psychology na.. When u don't call him, dude will feel something is wrong or u seeing someone. Make yourself a bit expensive
ReplyDeleteJust a month and you've opened your legs for him twice, without even knowing him. Why are ladies like this.
ReplyDeleteIt's very advisable to get to know someone to some extent before becoming close let alone sleeping with him/her. You barely know this guy and I do not see why you claimed you are dating him. This is how people continue to have soul ties here and there. Omase oo
And people are cheering are on saying it's not a big deal. No self respect at all amongst youths these days.
Delete*cheering her
DeleteThose people cheering her will first call her names assuming she wrote about being pregnant for him, hypocrites supporting evil just because they do the same.
Delete*usually hang out every Monday* but you only met him a month ago. If you're above 21, you should know some of the golden rule, flooding your phone with messages and calls is a sign that he hasn't tasted the *cookie* after that it reduces. The moment you find out he didn't inform or mention to you about a friend's party even if you're not invited, Omo take off, you're just sex buddies. I don't know many men that can leave their phones in their car overnight, that's a big fat lie dear, He is very married or in a commited relationship, if divorced then he doesn't want any string attached. It's too early to be chasing a man with calls and not getting a call back. My candid advice, delete his number so you're not tempted to call and even when he calls and you pick by mistake tell him straight up that you're not interested anymore.
ReplyDeleteYou met a guy a month ago and you've already had sex with him two times??? Hmmm!! Dear fellow females, it is actually 20 out of 100 men that you'd give your body to so cheaply and he'd still treat you like a treasure or the love of his life. Often times,a Man may see you for the first time and fall in love with your person, carriage and all, in his head, he'd rate you so high.....Only for you to be act all cheap to him by letting him even hold you too closely to himself after one month?? Come on sis, there's nothing drawing him to you any more, He's no longer excited about you, Why?? Because he has simply seen everything that makes you a woman, he has even played with those stuffs so, there's nothing special again!! Dear women, let's all learn to be hard to get, let's all play the role of a precious gorgeous glorious QUEEN in the lives of our men, that way, they'd value and respect us. And even after playing all queeny and expensively, he still goes ahead and phucks up, you take a walk out of the relationship like a boss cos you have absolutely nothing to lose!!! Always play smart ladies, there's more to this life than sex with just anybody, Dalu kwo nu. #CHISOM
ReplyDelete👌👌
DeleteI totally disagree with you ,a man that wants to stay will stay with or without having sex with you ,people and their sanctimonious view .Yes, biblically sex before marriage is a sin but saying Amman u gave your body to during early stages of getting to know some won’t treasure you it’s a pure baseless lie.If you like wait for 10years before having sex ,a man that wants to stay will stay even if u guys had sex same day or week u met.
Delete***And even after playing all queeny and expensively, he still goes ahead and phucks up, you take a walk out of the relationship like a boss cos you have absolutely nothing to lose!!!
DeleteLOUD IT!!
@16:24, well said!! Very well said!!
DeleteAnony 17:15 I'm sorry, but your comment is totally off!!I mean,it has absolutely nothing to do with what I typed up there, it does not correlate at all. Do yourself a favor and learn how to comprehend!! Besides, the tone of your comment sounds so angry!! Biko chill and stop venting under my comment. Go back and read it up. this time gently,carefully and calmly.I promise,you will understand the writeup much better,nne bye bye oo?? #CHISOM
Delete👍👍👍 Chisom
DeleteYour guy has other babes and sees you as too clingy,if a guy doesn't call leave him alone, stop crowding his space,if he was in love with you and the sex spun him out of his senses, he would be with you even in a birthday party,he would showcase you to his friends and let you know your the one,my dear the gut wanted sex got it and has moved on,dust your bum bum and waka jejejly.
ReplyDeletePoster are u sure he is not married?
ReplyDeleteI think he's done with out. Help yourself by getting him off your mind. Not talking about the sex but I think u gave in too quick to start having emotional issues this early. The signs are all there he doesnt want u. Stay away and if he really needs u, he will vhange and put in more effort. Good luck.
ReplyDeleteThis covid19 is not enough for you to know that Jesus is coming and you are still talking of your boyfriend,he has gone after getting what he wanted so pls move on he won't call you girl
ReplyDeleteAnd even with Jesus coming, you are here with us on SDK. Or is this blog Bible Gateway? Better know as it is doing you.
DeleteClose ur leg, close ur leg. Una no go hear. He has gotten wat he wanted nah. Watelse
ReplyDeleteLet me brake a bro code to all you ladies, always sample the pussy twice, it helps to determine if you want to stay or run. Baba has sampled twice and with his behavior you can tell he is not feeling you poster, i think you are dating your self like stella said, i advice you move on, shikena
ReplyDeletePoster you most ght be right and at thesame time wrong, I just cane out of a similar relationship. I jejely gave myself sense and stopped calling him and out of the blues, he called and started apologising that he knows he has not been fair to me. I never bothered to argue with him ooo, I allowed him to burn his airtime and after rattling, I just said "okay, bye". That's the end because I've already moved on a long time ago. So, be wise.
ReplyDeleteYea,that's a good one... Op take this advice.
DeleteMy husband used to use that excuse of forgetting his phone in the car. And me mumu I used to believe. Chei
ReplyDeleteBia sister is it not clear that dude was only in for the short term...na chop clean mouth things...biko move on the better things and learn to cover your legs
ReplyDeleteBeg him to be yours bcus people advising u to leave him would not provide u bf or husband. Find out the reason for his actions and be sure he is not a married man. Find out what his likes and dislikes. Boo is scares to get. Walk on dat relationship. Little challenge BVS will be advising to walk away. U gave him sex doesn't matter. How many women got married as virgins. Don't feel used.
ReplyDeleteHe is married boo
ReplyDeleteVery married
Or in a commuted relationship
Who has a serious job and hangs out on Monday?
Which serious man hangs out on Monday?
Dude is not a manager of anywhere.
Remember the good sex and move on before you become pregnant for someone who is not serious about himself.
KING XOXO MYSTERY
Call me old school, old fashioned or sanctimonious I don't care! You gave up the cookie too fast. What were you thinking? Fornication is still a sin the last time I checked.
ReplyDeletePlease just move on don't stress on it
ReplyDeletePlease move on,both of you aren't meant to be...a guy that's not happy to call u,is not the right one
ReplyDeleteThe fact that you're 'still thinking' about ending it tells me you're not a serious person. You're looking for a man to love you when you don't even love yourself. Sorry but sometimes we need to be harsh on some of you. How long have you been a BV here? You havn't learned from our own stories? You still have to go and make the same mistakes. 🤦♂️
ReplyDeletePoster you’re extremely too clingy!!! That’s one of the reasons why he bailed out. You’re suffocating him for goodness sake! What type of nonsense calls do you want to make in one day? Just one month??? Work on your emotional issues before embarking on another relationship. You’re way too clingy and you’ll continue to get hurt if you don’t really work on yourself! Maybe this also stems from your childhood. Were you neglected as a child? Did parents show you love? Please see a therapist if you have to. You need to heal from your emotional pain/issues before getting into a relationship so you can be in a healthy one and be respected. If not, you’ll continue to have these problems in a relationship. Ps: a lot of Nigerian women lacks fathers love, which really affects us when it comes to relationship. Break that cycle please and love yourself first, read positive affirmations to self, pray/fast, see a therapist, etc... goodluck
ReplyDeleteMove on already dear
ReplyDelete