Our discussion couch is here for you to sit and think before you start discussing.........
Ladies please take note!!!
Men attend to Women for two reasons, S#X, and LOVE,and most times They do not Marry for S#x or for Love, but for STABILITY.
Let me explain:
A man can Love you and not Marry you.
A man can have s#x with you for years without marrying you But immediately he finds someone who brings stability into his life, he marries her.
Men attend to Women for two reasons, S#X, and LOVE,and most times They do not Marry for S#x or for Love, but for STABILITY.
Let me explain:
A man can Love you and not Marry you.
A man can have s#x with you for years without marrying you But immediately he finds someone who brings stability into his life, he marries her.
That is why you find some women rant ''He dated me for 10 years and left me to marry someone he just met two months ago...She must have used Jazz on him''
''He is a wicked man''
''He is a wicked man''
Stability is "Peace of Mind" and when a man finds stability with someone else when he is with you,nothing can make him stay.......
Some guys say "I love this lady but I don't think I can spend the rest of my life with her."
Men are visionaries when they think about marriage, they do not think about wedding dresses, bridesmaids,or anything that most Ladies think of.
They think about if she can build a home...
They think of if she can take care of the kids and if she can give them PEACE of mind.....
It's the comfort of having Peace of Mind they want.
S#x is a pleasure, love is an affection, RESPECT is Stability ♥️
S#x is a pleasure, love is an affection, RESPECT is Stability ♥️
#copied
Did this make sense?
I see no lies here. Lol
ReplyDeleteBut has anyone thought of the many men that used their own hands to destroy a once peaceful home because of their insatiable sexual appetite and turn it around on same wife to complain she is not giving him peace! How will you get peace when you give her pains and hypertension?
DeleteWe call them Oloriburuku"
DeleteGoing by this write up, it means men get married to who they can CONTROL.
DeleteIf you married who gives you peace, what are you looking for outside again?
Why are they everywhere with insatiable libido?
It simply means they are looking for who will groom offsprings for them in the name of marriage, while they keep jumping about.
Ladies, over to y'all that crave being married to them more than oxygen.
Is your mission on earth tied to multiplying offsprings for a man in a miserable condition? Don't you love happiness yourself?
Y'all better wake up and stop letting them condemn y'all to this trash.
Marriage is for LOVE and COMPANIONSHIP first before offspring. If a marriage is not serving you that, wetin you gain for the matter? ��
When you are good and FAITHFUL to a woman, she will give you peace. It's pretty simple, most of the men who complain of no peace with their women, are doing something to trigger her. We need to be fair and balanced in our analysis.
DeleteI'm here to learn.
ReplyDeleteTrue. Respect and peace of mind are paramount to any man's life. Give him that and he will choose you over any woman
ReplyDeleteNot saying you should now be mumu
No. If he cheats or wants to start showing other women attention over you, you walk away and pull back in a feminine calm way without fighting and be open to other men not sleeping with them o. Basically u need to not make him think he's your whole world but when he acts good then reward him..
Peace of mind this, peace of mind that.
DeleteSo women dont deserve peace of mind.
Of all the married men I know and have ever come across in my life, peace of mind mean just one thing to them....
Allow me to be a bachelor while still married to you. Dont nag me even if I am acting terrible towards you.
Just give me my space bcos marriage is not a cage for men.
Once you can abide by these, you have given them peace of mind.
Forgetting that you can only get peace of mind when you give peace of mind to your partner.
And yeah alot of them are married to peace of mind but cheating with war. And War will most likely mess up their "peace of mind" marriage.
Una doh!
@ Davina, you will not die young, amen.
Delete@Davina, you just summarized the story of my life. May God bless you.
Delete@DavinaRose, you aren't ready for the blessings God will bestow upon you for this perfect comment you've made. Most men want maid/puppet as wives cos of their selfish in interest.
DeleteWell said @20:27
DeleteMakes a whole lot of sense.
ReplyDeleteLol I laugh when I see things like this.
ReplyDeleteIt goes both ways these days. You want peace of mind, fine and good. Are you giving her peace of mind too?
Women please be selective of who you give yourself to these days... if he’s not giving you peace, leave the relationship.
You date someone for 10 years and decide not to marry her cause you are looking for stability? A woman who sticks with you for 10 yrs without marrying you is a hell of stable lady.
Let’s not use nonsense to justify rubbish Abeg.
Yhup. They marry for “stability” and then cheat on “stability” with the real love of their life.
DeleteI don’t think people understand what love truly is tho.
That’s where the misunderstanding lies. Love brings stability, peace and respect.
Please marry whom you love and make sure The person you love loves you right back.
If you know you can’t marry who you are with right now, please end it and stop leading someone’s child on in the guise of “I love you o, but your wahala is too much.”
Yhup. They marry for “stability” and then cheat on “stability” with the real love of their life.
DeleteI don’t think people understand what love truly is tho.
That’s where the misunderstanding lies. Love brings stability, peace and respect.
Please marry whom you love and make sure The person you love loves you right back.
If you know you can’t marry who you are with right now, please end it and stop leading someone’s child on in the guise of “I love you o, but your wahala is too much.”
Thank you anon 13.42 gbam. Everytime women must do this and dat
DeleteThis peace of mind, is it seeing him cheating but keeping quiet? Or not being angry when one is suppose to?
ReplyDeleteStella if someone can marry my friend, someone that naturally hate a peaceful place, believe me the bottom line is, men don't know what they want
It's not 100% true joor. I know someone who got married because his mum chose the girl for him. Nothing like respect there, the lady tear eye pass the guy but he still married her so that the mum won't die out of heart break
ReplyDeleteTrue. I work with a guy that is married and one day he said he doesn't like quiet boring girls when going out for fun n clubbing. I asked if his wife is the crazy girls he likes and he said "No. That is why she's a wife. I married her cus she's the quiet one in the relationship n very close to God so she can train my kids to be God fearing"
ReplyDeleteThat thing opened my eyes o. I guess it goes without saying that he cheats obviously but I suppose his wife has accepted that she's married to a sex freak and as long as he is responsible with bills and making them comfortable at home, she's ok.
100% true!!!
ReplyDeleteHmmmmm. This spoke to my conscious mind.
ReplyDeleteYes it made a whole lot of sense
ReplyDeleteWomen too need peace of mind
ReplyDeleteLies upon lies. It does not make sense. What is stability and what is peace of mind? When a man would leave a woman that shows him all of the above and he'll still leave to marry someone they term has 'Pedigry'. Oshisco, any woman that wants to marry and marry well should pls go to God in prayer let HiM be the one to fish out that man that will be loyal for you.
ReplyDeletePreach 🙌🏻
ReplyDeleteMen that are confused. Stella leave talk abeg.
ReplyDeleteMen of nowadays are more concerned about marrying rich ladies, they don't care if she will give them peace of mind or not.
Take for instance, DJ Cuppy, every male is in her comment session begging her to marry them, none of them is after peace of mind. They just want to marry her because of who her father is.
Men say they want a God fearing woman but won't look at a godly woman twice because she is not bringing anything to the table.
WO, just find someone that you want your kids to look like and marry, whether man or woman.
The world is about to end sef
"just find someone that you want your kids to look like"
DeleteHahahahahah!!!! If only.
😂😂😂😅
Delete😂 😂 😂 😂 😂, abi nau
DeleteThis is absolutely true, at least from my experience and those of men I am close to. The painful part is that SOME WOMEN on this blog will still argue otherwise.
ReplyDeleteEverytime men this men that, marriage this , marriage that.haba
ReplyDeleteIt’s tiring right? But the painful truth is that till the end of the world, they will always be topics to contend with.
DeleteYinmu
ReplyDeleteIf they really want peace of mind, why are they looking for doctors and nurses to marry? They want a career woman that will still do their biddings without questions 😂😂. Confusion dima!
ReplyDeleteHow will they have peace of mind when they will marry a medical doctor and force her to become a housewife?? Peace of mind my foot!
ReplyDeleteOTIO！ hahaha
DeleteI support the wife biko. Inukwa medical doctor turned housewife,impo.
The post makes sense ti an extent:for some not all.I was attending to another woman's kids in a banking hall on a cold rainy day not knowing my hubby was keenly observing by the time I was through with transactions and leaving he blocked me by the door,the rest is history. He loves a peaceful home with happy kids,dazall though some still believe it was an arrangee,E no concern me. Just be yourself, a cousin married a lady because she screams like his mum, chews gum snd laughs the 'patience ozokwor way'like his mum.
Weird but that is his 'peace' today they have 3kids and a happy home.
Some men married fellow igbo smokers,they love the way their wife puffs,duuuuuh.
I saw 'pedigry'up there, hahaha. Some men are not for Pedigree, they hook up the next available chic.
Respect is stability? That part to me doesn’t make sense.
ReplyDeleteI agree with most of the write-up though, but in certain context, or with respect to men of a certain criteria. As the quality of men keep dipping, the ability to take such ‘visionary’ decisions diminishes. You then see men who marry people with more emphasis on factors that are transient.
Men well rooted culturally, morally, psychologically and otherwise I believe make better effort to ensure they marry based on qualities in the lady that can stand the test of time.
people make marriage a one sided thing, what is the man bringing to the table too. okay you want a woman that gives you peace of mind right? are you ready to do same. A lot of men bring out the beast in women and when the woman starts reacting the world will only see the mad side of her, no one is talking about what instigating it or the instigator.
ReplyDeleteMen please also give women peace of mind and stability. don't think you are doing a woman any favor by marrying her. purge that mindset.
Exactly!!!!!!!!!!
DeleteA whole lot...story of my life! Love you dearest hubby🥰🥰🥰
ReplyDeleteit still boils down to choice and compatibility. You want what you want. This goes for both genders too
ReplyDeleteAll these ones are theory. there is no stable home with a cheating partner..A cheating partner makes his/her home unstable..
ReplyDeleteStability isn't the word, a woman who can accept their misbehaviour without asking questions (cheating, lies, late nights, emotional manipulation etc) is who they readily marry.
ReplyDeleteRespect is stability, really?? How'd you respect a man who doesn't respect you as an individual? How'd you respect a man who talks down on his spouse? How'd you respect a man who doesn't keep to the vows he made before God & men? I thought respect is a two-way thing??
This is my opinion please 🤷
Plz loud it!
DeleteThey want a mumu for a wife na. The Oga, thank sir kind of wife.
DeleteMakes sense.
ReplyDeleteNonsence. This is the narrative they use to manipulate women. Give the woman peace and she will naturally give you peace even daddy freeze talk am
ReplyDeleteI am telling you. The sad part is a lot of men are brought up to believe this cock and bull story. "Marry a woman that gives you peace" without them working on themselves to also give those women peace.
DeleteAre you saying women do not desire or deserve peace of mind?? Or we do not seek stability in a man?
This kind of talk is what society hands to african men in particular, to justify their waywardness.
Mz Lynn thank God we are much wiser now. Men acting like they are doing you a favour mtcheww after you give them peace in relationship just know you are going to be a prisoner when they marry you because you will be disregarded at even chance you get to air yourfeelings before you know it they will say you are no longer giving peace
DeleteMz Lynn, this is why their bitter "peaceful" wives are killing them these days. There is no woman who loves you and whom you cheat on, who would be happy. Some can endure and grow increasingly bitter and snap some day. Just pray that when she eventually snaps, she only walks away and doesn't kill you.
DeleteI don't believe this one bit. I know of a man very close to me, who was in a relationship with a young lady who ticked all his boxes, but the feelings weren't just there. He thought he could cope, but when the misery was too much, he called off the relationship and married another woman whom he loved dearly but she wasn't as "humble and meek" as his former.
ReplyDeleteI totally disagree and it's so unfair to women. Men are selfish when it comes to marriage which is very bad. I don't blame any lady who sets standard for herself on the kind of man she wants. Why should a lady even be happy that a man chose her over others. Most of you see it as if a man is doing you a favor by marrying you. I was extremely selfish when I was single. You don't fit in, I push you out. If the one I'm married to messes up today, I move on. Marriage is not an achievement to some of us. I can never nag, cheat or disrespect my husband and I deserve to be respected and peace of mind too. It goes both way
ReplyDeleteGod bless you for this comment
DeleteI am not sure you are African or 'Nigerian.' 1,000 shots of Champagne for you + strawberries in it for you there. So there are women who think like me too? WOW, such sweet relief!
DeleteThanks all. Anon 16:03, I am full time nnewi woman married to nnewi man too. Where can I get my champagne biko? Some of us just know our worth especially when you're well brought up too.
DeleteSome ladies are like good product but with bad marketing department. Women do not bring anything to marriage that's why men die first---too many widows vs few widowers. That beautiful lady that is single at 30 is not because there are no suitors, there is a characteristic of her that scares men away. There are 2 categories of ladies 1) the ones who claim to be feminists and 2) ones who are in a loving relationship. Choose wisely. The choice is yours
ReplyDeleteWow (but not in a good way). Some poor woman will actually marry you? Just wow!
DeleteErmmm noo!!!! I am in my 30s and have refused to settle for scumbags.have it at the back of your mind that the woman you think is chasing men away also has men that want that exact same thing so let's be clear.wasted 1 min of my quarantine time to reply mtecww
DeleteSERIOUSLY???????????
DeleteBozo!
DeleteI wont be surprised if you are Igbo...im Igbo too!
Men Like you oppress their wives ..
These women are not expected to have a voice or an opinion about anything ..if they dare to they are branded feminists.
I'm sure you are my Igbo brother...Ozu nwulu anwu
Thank God for the yorubas who by exposure let their women have a voice and opinions
Thank God for the husband of FUNMILAYO RANSOME KUTI who let his wife thrive ..God bless the good reverend!
Look at the kids a strong woman like that churned out...DR. Olikoye, Beko, Fela..look at the grand children her own kids raised in return..Yeni,Femi and Seun etal ..a third generation still affected by the voice their granny had!
They still have an opinion years after!
WOLE SOYINKA is their cousin
Wole was raised by a female from the Kuti Family
Strong women raise Strong confident children!
Their mothers are gone but generations after their opinions and views still resonate through their kids!
OGA GO AND MARRY YOUR 15 YEAR OLD MGBANKWO FROM OGBEDE who you will NOT LOVE..who you dont have a plan to commit to..who you will keep at home and go fuck other women.
IF YOUR MOTHER BROUGHT NOTHING TO MARRIAGE MINE DID!Asu anwuru!
My mother is my biggest life asset if you had respect for your mum the line about women not bringing anything to marriage would never happen!
I am raising my kids exactly how I was raised ..
My brothers wives are happy with the men momma raised!
My parting shot????? IBU NNUKWUTE OKPO ...Generalization gbu kwa gi there!
What a mentality, I pity who will end up with you and this your mindset
Delete*Larry was here*
Bozo!
DeleteI wont be surprised if you are Igbo...im Igbo too!
Men Like you oppress their wives ..
These women are not expected to have a voice or an opinion about anything ..if they dare to they are branded feminists.
I'm sure you are my Igbo brother...Ozu nwulu anwu
Thank God for the yorubas who by exposure let their women have a voice and opinions
Thank God for the husband of FUNMILAYO RANSOME KUTI who let his wife thrive ..God bless the good reverend!
Look at the kids a strong woman like that churned out...DR. Olikoye, Beko, Fela..look at the grand children her own kids raised in return..Yeni,Femi and Seun etal ..a third generation still affected by the voice their granny had!
They still have an opinion years after!
WOLE SOYINKA is their cousin
Wole was raised by a female from the Kuti Family
Strong women raise Strong confident children!
Their mothers are gone but generations after their opinions and views still resonate through their kids!
OGA GO AND MARRY YOUR 15 YEAR OLD MGBANKWO FROM OGBEDE who you will NOT LOVE..who you dont have a plan to commit to..who you will keep at home and go fuck other women.
IF YOUR MOTHER BROUGHT NOTHING TO MARRIAGE MINE DID!Asu anwuru!
My mother is my biggest life asset if you had respect for your mum the line about women not bringing anything to marriage would never happen!
I am raising my kids exactly how I was raised ..
My brothers wives are happy with the men momma raised!
My parting shot????? IBU NNUKWUTE OKPO ...Generalization gbu kwa gi there!
Women do not bring anything to the table. You must be high on cheap weed. Please don't get married with this level of stupidity, it is appalling.
DeleteThis is supposed to be the truth but men don't just know what they want
ReplyDeleteApart from not knowing what they want, they're selfish. Always making it look like they're doing a woman's a favour by marrying her. Anyway, they know their type
DeletePlenty sense dey this yarns o.
ReplyDeleteI don dey yarn am tey tey say Naija girls prepare for wedding
and not marriage. 🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️
They marry monies and abroad and not peace of mind.
Dudes do not marry heavy nyansh or (sewed)boobies that Naija ladies
rush to do...Mbanu, na only forkboys that one go attract.
Ndi uta ngwanu shoot arrows at that pesin wey yarn that post
unu anugo? 😘😘😘
I can't believe there are men out there who want to get married. Why would any sane man do that to himself? Let ladies marry themselves. Sex? Use lotion and rub one out. It is a champagne of victory.
ReplyDeleteJoker, hope that wanking will give you children?
DeleteLove will find you soon. When it does, you will change this tune.
DeleteWomen too are logical. When I meet a guy I know if he is just a social climber or just really trying to grow but heck me too I also need someone to learn from since the man is supposed or meant to b the head why should i marry someone i am better than financially, spiritually, intellectually then morally. If girls are strategic u call them gold diggers or she never old. See marriage is a transaction not necessary economical but if I m better than u in all these boxes then u r not the one. U should meet or surpass me in one or more of these boxes
ReplyDeleteHave they also considered what could make a lady leave a 10 years relationship after the guy must have seen her through school and helped her and her family live a better life. Ladies, please choose your man and never allow societal pressure pus
ReplyDeleteAlso, peace of mind can be different things to different men. To some, a beautiful woman or an independent wealthy lady or a tall lady or an educated Lady or a fair lady or lady from a wealthy home and the list goes on.
Have they also considered what could make a lady leave a 10 years relationship after the guy must have seen her through school and helped her and her family live a better life. Ladies, please choose your man and never allow societal pressure push you to a bad home.
ReplyDeleteAlso, peace of mind can be different things to different men. To some, a beautiful woman or an independent wealthy lady or a tall lady or an educated Lady or a fair lady or lady from a wealthy home and the list goes on.
This is still a post still trying to justify the wickedness of some men. I'm surprised people are agreeing to this.
ReplyDeleteIt is always the woman's fault na. She didn't give him stability, she did not give him peace of mind.
Did he give her reasons to give him peace of mind??? Did he make the home stable enough for her to give him stability???
Oh pls.
Abeg, it's a lie!
ReplyDeleteMen have married for physical appearance (beauty, fair, big boobs, big bumbum, etc.)
Men have married for green card
Men have married for the woman's money
Men have married to please their family members
Men have married to please religious leaders
Men have married to spite an ex
If men get married because they see the woman gives him peace, then why are many marriages breaking up? Why are men cheating up and down? Why do some men go back to their exes?
I hate seeing writeups like this, insinuating that the reason a man chose A over B was because B wouldn't give him peace of mind. As if A is better than B. Most times, it is never like that.
I know a man who said he married his wife coz she talks to hi. Lieka mother would. Na waoh
DeleteI know a man who said he married his wife coz she talks to him like a mother. Na waoh.. I saw her pictures once and she looks more mature than him. Very rich handsome young guy laidis
Deletegbam
DeleteFor some men, peace of mind = I can cheat all I want and not get called out for it.
ReplyDeleteFor some men, stability = a rich woman who accepts all the crap I do and does not complain.
Many people do not really understand love in the manner in which God ordained for marriage. Including the poster
ReplyDeleteExtremely selfish post.Give me peace yèn yèn.How many of them brings peace to the table? they marry stability and cheat on her with the ones they love and still expect stability to be stable. The result is divorce now.If that was working fir them , there shouldnt be divorce in the Country
ReplyDeleteMen marry who is available when they are ready for marriage and love has got nothing to do with it.And for men, sex means 'love.'
ReplyDeleteWell,from my little observation, a man gets to a stage where he is ready to settle down and start a family. When some men gets to this stage, they marry the next available female that agrees to marry them. Stability or not abeg.
ReplyDeleteTRUTH!!!! The next available female when he's ready to marry
DeleteI AGREE
ReplyDeleteI agree
ReplyDeleteI never took the "...you give me peace" I always get seriously until this post.
ReplyDeleteIn my opinion,
Responsible men want drama-free ladies at the homefront who know how to give them some spice(exclusive to them alone).
Women want a homely man but they almost always settle for less because of society and the fear of being on the shelf for too long.
I think it depends largely on the man in question. Let's assume, for argument sake, that this is 85% true, there's still a 25% minority. What happens if a woman reading this meets one of the men in the minority and feels she needs to pretend to be docile and swallow all for peace sake but it turns out that the guy in question wants a woman with a little fire in her belly? It's safer to just be yourself, the one who wants you, warts and all, will come for you.
ReplyDeleteAnother angle that has been ignored is the upbringing and values of various men. Imagine having a father like Pete Edochie, your mentality will be completely different from a man raised by a more liberal and less cultural father. Even in Nigeria, there are different cultures who have different beliefs when it comes to marriage.
I know some men who married women with amazingly short fuses, the Jezebelian temperament but are extraordinarily creative in bed. Some men got dumped or duped by the ladies they were in love with, so they ended up marrying their "second best" while still jonesing for the one that got away.
I know some men who actually married for love and that love blinds them to their partners's flaws. Some men have dumped homely, peaceful ladies for wild spit fires. Some see that personality type as boring and bland. It can never be a one size fits all scenario. Like the nursery rhyme goes "some like it hot, some like it cold, some like it in the pot 3 days old."
Perhaps if there were an anonymous post online, not necessarily on this blog, where men can write in to tell the reason or reasons they married their wives, the statistics will either lend credence to this assertion or completely discredit it. For now, I will take it as the opinion of one man who feels he can speak for all men.
who will read all these you typed? Common statement, you are writing thesis. Ladies like you talk their husbands to alcoholism.
DeleteAnon 13:40. You didn't have to read it. For those of us that read it, she made a lot of sense as usual. By the way, you seem to know a lot about alcoholism and its causes.
Deleteso why divorce
ReplyDeleteAll the good women are married before 28. Above 28 are littered with useless, lazy and ill-mannered rejects. A lady who cannot settle down from 18-28 has more baggage than a trash can. Some of them will pontificate. Why are you still single at 28? You are so perfect like God that no man is good enough for you? Show me one happy single lady above 28 and I will show you a bridge from Lagos to London. Come Stella's SnM, they crawl out for attention.Even some of them still act like they have a choice. Pleease!
ReplyDeleteEiyaa! Your ignorance stinks to high heavens!
DeleteEgbe eligwe gbagbuo gi
DeleteSome men don't get enough credit. I have looked at some people's wives and wonder how their husbands get erection look at them. God bless side chics and runs girls else some men will die in perpetual misery. You only live once.
ReplyDeleteVute kwe Corona n'izu a
DeleteHave you seen the average Nigerian man with his beer induced 6months pregnant belly, breasts and nkwobi induced fat cheeks? Tufiakwa! Nigerian women are trying, hoohaa! Thank God my hubby is still trim after 10years of marriage.
ReplyDelete