STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
NEW WIFE ADVICE NEEDED ASAP
Hello Stella,
Thanks for the work you do, BVs your comments are always the spice of the post. To my story, I got married late last year at 31 and a virgin so I was looking forward to Wedding night and scared as well, although I didn't believe in testing I had taken BVs advice to check for an erection and I felt an erection whenever we kissed or hugged.
Fast forward to the wedding night, it was so painful at a point I told DH that I wasn't sure there was a hole there **giggles** he laughed and we tried a week later and succeeded.
The issue here is, I read about all the satisfaction and fuss people make about s#x but I'm yet to feel anything, I only feel like having an organism when fingered but with the D, I barely feel anything.
My hubby says it's because my vayjay is up and his D cannot get there,biko I don't understand what that means (he is not small though) I just want to experience this thing that makes people say they hung their legs on the window and were screaming....
Should I see a gynea? He is not particularly excited about seeing one as he doesn't want anyone prodding between my legs he says( but I think he is ashamed about not satisfying me).
I can stay without it, done that for this long but then i refuse to believe this narrative that trusting God and going the God way leads to regret.
BVs and Stella please advice
P.s we are not trying for kids yet so this is more for satisfaction(based on all the WNB I have read) than for procreation.
Regards
Anonymous wife
*Organism kwa? 👀👀 kawakwakwakwakwakwakwakwakwakwakwa...OMG..I cant stop laughing.My dear,It is ORGASM.
I dont understand what your hubby means by it is up...omg...heheehhehehehe.I am so so sorry,I cant just stop laughing....
Both of you should see a doctor for counseling
ReplyDeleteI don't think it has to to with seeing a gynea. You get orgasm when your clit is stimulated that is why you only get it from fingering. Try riding him,or he doing the doggy style while he rubs your clit.
DeletePoster ,try being on top, dts d way most ladies can reach vaginal orgasm. ..however, clitoral or vaginal, orgasm na orgasm.. .me i onli com wen i'm on top.. Other tyms my clot mmust b stimulated by fingers ...Hp this helped. ..
DeleteI can only reach orgasm with finger so after sex, oga will start hand job if I'm up to it. Most times I'm just ok just having D inside there. Not everybody cum through the normal route. You are ok.
DeleteIt's all in the position, a lot of women do not get orgasm from just penetration, he has to do it from an angle where the clit will be stimulated. Keep trying, you will get it someday.
DeleteCounselling on top orgasm matter? Lol...poster truth you probably didnt know before now is that some women will just never have an orgasm through penetrative sex. Its not your fault,itmight not be your hubby's fault either...it is just what it is. You are still early in marriage and still have a lot of sexual experimenting to do to find out what works for you. Have you ever masturbated and had an orgasm? If you have,what did you do that made you orgasm? That may be your passport to O-land,but now hubby can help you to it. As for me,I have never ever had an orgasm through penetrative sex in my life. I only orgasm when in a particular position ( by locking my legs together and pressing down on my clitoris). I have accepted My fate and lif is all good. As long as my hubby is satisfied,I can do the rest myself.find what works for you.
DeleteBest reply
DeleteYou and your husband need to read or watch how it’s done. Most women don’t orgasm from penetration but fingering and Cunnilingus so he needs to know how to administer both or one. No need for a gynae because knowing Nigerian medical personnel’s, they’d get judgmental and end up making you feel part for wanting more than just pounding. Both of you should find your satisfaction together, tell him what you want and how and if he cares he’d learn them.
ReplyDeleteIn addition to what Doppelganger wrote up there, poster be more experimental with positions. For me there is one particular position that is a go-to position that works all the time and that is putting my legs together and lying on my right side. For some its the doggy and others its when he penetrates from the back while you lie flat on your stomach. Also nice aphrodisiacs like chocolates and yoghurt helps but the surest i can guarantee you is red wine! Girl, start the night with a sweetened bottle of red wine and see your self loosen up and fly on the wings of goddess Bacchus herself. A little alcohol is a guarantee, trust me. 2glasses and you will hit cloud 9 in multiples😎.
DeleteCome back and thank me later.
Tell your hubby to suck you,from breast to down.
Delete#coversFace
I be Christian mother
The power of a sweet red wine. Hmmm....
DeleteHow dear you Sapphy! Bacchus is a he, inugo!?
DeleteLol
Stella!!! Anya adiro gi mma oooo, I laughed when I saw the organism as well. Me no be sex expert, let me wait for BlackBerry to comman finish work🤸♀️🤸♀️
ReplyDeletePoster there is different btw enjoying sex and having orgasm! U can enjoy sex and wont have orgasm. People believe women that are circumcised dnt have orgasm! But is a lie. I was circumcised and I experience orgasm but not through penetrative sex. 70% of women does not experience orgasm. That's a fact. Kindly relax. Watch romantic movies. Try find out wat part of ur body turn you on. By the time ur hubby locate your G spot, U will see d diff. But first! Stop thinking about it. Just open your mind to it. Sex is a mindset..
DeleteI'll go anonymous on this one.
ReplyDeleteI got married a virgin and couldn't understand what the fuss about sex was.
I had gusts from sex about their jaw dropping sexual experiences and I couldn't just relate.
I had to call a few up to know if anything was wrong with me and they all said I'll get to enjoy it with time.
Honestly, I still don't unless it's a head and I have resigned to fate.
Yours may be different, if not... Welcome to the club.
Madam never you give up until you have try all the different styles, go online and read stuffs. Try different things, do new things you will be happy you are able to get the answers you are looking for.
DeleteThere are many like this. Many men are not skillful enough and most don't know it or care to.
DeleteWell said @excited courtesy... You guys need to explore to find out what works for you. I know someone that cums only when given head, unfortunately her husband doesn't know Jack about head giving. I know another that only cums when it's the doggy style.. Find out what you enjoy by exploring
DeleteThen let him finger you till you explode. If you touch my clit too much, I get irritated. I hardly come through penetrative sex, but once I put his dick in between my thigh... very close to my vjay... I squeeze and then vibration don start like Nokia 3310. Do what works for you.
ReplyDeleteYou people will not finish someone with laugh 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 which one again is vibration don start like Nokia 3310 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
DeleteAnon 15:10 that style is super bae. Especially when the lady lie on her stomach, then d guy put it between her butt n then tribbing all the way. OMG!
DeleteGbemi my love, I will forever miss you for this
Ouch, this sounds painful for the guy...
Delete@ Na me... It's not painful oo. It can only hurt when the lady has Igbo irumole(too much pubic hair). But when she's shaved clean, OMG! E dey sweet baje baje, especially when u add lubricant(spit or oil) jeez!
DeleteSee, dont start this comparison building up In your mind o, just condition your mind to enjoy him before u start fantasizing on who can give u orgasm, sometimes only tongue gives it, it varies, unless you want to show your wild oats.😉
ReplyDeleteBB
DeleteThe Authority on bedmatics 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Hail ings
Exactly. They should explore his other's body more and continue with what gives orgasm before/after penetration... Poster the work is for you and your husband and not a third party...
Delete*sow...
DeleteLol@ Organism
ReplyDeleteThis just brought memories of a story one of my friends told me,
How a girl was having sex with her boo and was shouting she's having Organism organism .......
Lmao 😂😂😂😂😂
🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔if today poster is the lady your friend is referring to. Just ajuju 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
DeleteIt's cos u are new to it,it might take months for u to start enjoying it, depends on how frequently u guys do it.its nothing serious actually, it's normal for u to feel dat way,it happened to me too.
ReplyDeleteEven years sometimes,keep the "mushy" feeling intact,cuddle and romance eathother more without penetration in mind,you won't know one day when u reach your heights,might not even be the tallest heights at once but it becomes enjoyable with little touches and long smooching....!
DeleteI had a good laugh too. Omg. I go up he is up I am up. Up up we go. Am I to go up? I am. His he up? He is down. I go down and down down we go.🤣🤣🤣 shebi the gynecologist want to bring the vigina down? Pls talk to ur man he needs to learn to pleasure u. I hear alot of Nigerian men never know how to pleasure their wives. The moment they come,they just get up not caring if the woman is satisfied or not. Very sad. But also be calm it gets better after 6months if u are consistent.
ReplyDeleteMadam, legitimate dey sweet and give peace of mind na. 😊😊😊
ReplyDeleteJust tell your oga on top wetin you want make im do.
If na to use his fingers to do piano there, let him do am until you are
"water logged," then make he take you go orgasm before he begin look for his own
satisfaction. Remember that Love seeks not his own...
Another way is for him to pound and reach in the morning (when most dudes biologically does)
and then face work for ya matter for night -when most sisis biologically do. 😊😊😊
Ahaaaaaaa, in that way, una go dey do turn by turn and you go dey jolly, jolly dey
smile in the morning like Sisi wey chop okpa di oku
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 Yes, I dey yarn this one from experience 😘😘
Orgasms happen differently for different people. Most often from mouth action. For penetration, you'll have to get adjusted to each other. It's early days for you guys. Keep exploring each other and I don't see the need for a gynae yet. Cheers!
ReplyDeleteOrgasms happen differently for different people. Most often from mouth action. For penetration, you'll have to get adjusted to each other. It's early days for you guys. Keep exploring each other and I don't see the need for a gynae yet. Cheers!
ReplyDeleteThat's how some of you give yourselves sexual problems. We all are sexually designed differently and it can never be the same. Satisfaction varies. All you need to do is be patient, explore each other and I am sure you'd find out your own kind of satisfaction. Read stuff online and and take it step by step. Some of "those" people who come out to say such things don't even enjoy sex but say all that to show they are having fun. Don't be in a hurry.
ReplyDeleteSluttychic.
Babe better don't get over worked up oh,just few women get orgasm..try and read tips on how to enjoy it,engage in a long foreplay before penetration! U will be fine..
ReplyDeleteYea, just what I'm about to type. Engage in longer foreplay so that you can get very wet before sex. Honestly I was so sad when I had sex because I didn't understand what the fuss was all about even though my boyfriend then was well endowed. I only enjoy foreplay.
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteI'm team sex before marriage. Abegi! I have started testing since 21. Sex is meant to be pleasurable. How will you know what exactly is the problem when you haven't slept with another man before? Abeg have sex but use protection that's my own. Life is too short for boring sex
ReplyDeleteSex with protection is not sweet to me biko
DeleteGod bless you my darling 😘😘😘😘😘
DeleteJust imagine the stressful chronicle. It's too up, too this etc. Complains everywhere. Can't deal mehn..
How can you come to this life and fuck one dick all your life 🤷🏿♀️
DeleteSimache they will come for your head today. It will be waste of energy to wait patiently for the right one and final have a boring sex life. Na who do you😂😂😂😂.
Delete@ your last line got me laughing 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I think HIV is sweeter huh. How about dat. Una no go hear till u become baby mama or catch disease. Protect urself. Anon 15.36
DeletePls don’t test anything oh wait till marriage. You can’t have it all in life.
DeleteI have never had orgasm through penetration as a woman before. i can only have orgasm when given head. please bv's is it normal or do i have a problem?
ReplyDeleteYou are perfectly normal dear.
DeleteTrust me u dont have a problem, many people are like that.Relax your mind and tell yourself you are very okay.
DeleteMine was after I had my third child,that was when I started having orgasm during penetration.Before then it through foreplay,I asked my husband what changed.
DeleteYour husband need a tutorial. 😂
ReplyDeleteOn point. That guy no sabi do at all.
DeleteDon are you any chance asking if you can take her husband on a tutorial class with the poster 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 just ajuju🏃🏃🏃🏃🏃🏃🏃
DeleteHi dear,
ReplyDeleteThere is absolutely nothing wrong with you or hubby, well just inexperience. "Most" females, including my humble self, do not orgasm from penetration, our G spot is just not located there for God knows why, but can hit mad orgasm in different ways, e.g. cunninglingus, fingering, tribbing with the dick (this is out of the world for me), e.t.c
Secondly, girl you need to relax so that your vaginal walls can relax. Sex is sweet believe me and highly pleasurable. From your write up, you will enjoy clitoris simulation a lot, reason why you feel like cummings while fingered, but you are not relaxed.
Men can be egotistic when it comes to not pleasing their women so take it easy with him, so he doesn't blank out.
Start by spending more time during fore play, with time, you'll get what works for you.
As an advice though, if he doesn't mind, cos most men do, let him try sucking you, tease your clitoris gently and sensually.
All the sex - best darling
Climb on top of your husband and start riding him. Make sure your clitoris is rubbing against his groin. That way, your clitoris is being stimulated while he’s inside You and you’re grinding him at the same time. That’s double the pleasure, and within 5 mins, you’ll be screaming in your native tongue. Trust me on this and thank me later
ReplyDeleteDo you have an idea of how painful it is for a newly disvirgined to climb on top penis? Especially a big one at that? Hian
DeleteThere is no pain in climbing ontop 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄 stop putting fear in her as this method is very simple. Let her try new things and see the one that works for her.
DeleteI agree with the poster being on top. Poster his D should b rubbing your clitoris while u ride him. Believe me u can last for minutes in ecstacy. That is more pleasurable that penetrative sex. U r perfectly normal.
Delete@DON, SINCE U R A PROFESSIONAL IN D FIELD, WE THE COUNCIL OF ELDERS FOR SDK VOLUNTEER YOU TO GIVE THE HUBBY AN INSIGHTFUL YET THRILLING TUTORIAL...... YAY OR NAY HOUSE.
ReplyDeleteI'm here to learn
ReplyDeleteThis was me at early days of marriage but my hubby was not happy that I don't enjoy it,in his words "what's the essence of love making if both party are not moaning in pleasure?",so he said I should allow him get familiar with my body.He started with touching,he told me any part he touched n I feel good I shouldn't be shy to moan in pleasure.Then sucking,kissing every part kissable(kissing my neck issa magic😊) before the actual thing(which sent me to cloud nine and beyond).
ReplyDelete😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 @ which sent me to cloud nine. Enjoy
DeleteYimu
DeleteHenjoyment. Many don't enjoy the main thing. They will just be moaning and waiting for the man to finish quick quick.
DeleteNote here poster....
DeletePoster it seems to me before you got married you usually fingers or touch yourself because that is the only thing that will make you not to enjoy penetration. If you didn't play around with fingering or touching then your body would have accepted the D and you feel cloud nine but because your body is already used to something else it will take extra work for you to get there.
ReplyDeleteI will say you both should try different styles, you should try cow girl, pussycat, doggy and more styles you will get one that will hit you badly to that you will get to cloud nine. Better still visit your doctor, men are always ashame to seek medical help especially when the blame is from them. Let your man have full confidence in you before you seek for medical help, never you use it to shame him. Keep your problem to yourself and hubby, do not involve family members no Matter what. Wishing you all the very best.
Please shut up and stop displaying your foolishness, go ask for enlightenment. You think its everyone that cums from vaginal penetration? You have a phone, use Google and get the necessary knowledge and stop behaving like an illiterate
DeleteDon't worry. All is well. You will eventually be a pro with time. Just relax
ReplyDeleteThis is just my story,i have been considering writing chronicle but decided to give it time though am worried.
ReplyDeleteWe both married as virgin and we are extremely godly too, so i have never watched porn neither has he. Its just head knowledge and few things we read just like all the comments.
I have tried these few tricks but no way, we both dont enjoy sex and we dont crave for it because of that, we just do it because we are married, sometimes we stay 2 weeks no sex. And in my mind whats the big deal.
About being on top i have tried but i cant ride him, in 1 minute my legs shake, is it that am not staying well or what, i don't get? I can't just ride at all, so is a no go area.
I really need to enjoy sex is boarding me, and we have never had oral sex. He is yet to accept or give a chance, which i doubt if he will ever accept as i said we are extremely godly.
I really need to enjoy sex because as it stands i can go one year without it as a married woman.
Go through the comments and pick what you need to. Extremely godly you say? You are both married you can't be doing extremely godly to each other. It's only a matter of time before you begin to manifest sexual frustrations because you have indicated you really need to enjoy sex. I only hope your extremely godly husband isn't having his fill somewhere else. Don't mind me but there's a possibility.
DeleteTonight ehn,dont start with the mind to penetrate, just play with each other,say sweet things and touch very intimately,for a long time....
DeletePoster
DeleteFollow 21.01
He is tour husband
His body is yours
Explore
Allow exploration from head to toe
Mumu buttons will be discovered
You did a right thing by not having sex till marriage. I am exactly like you but not yet married. Not sure I am in the right position to advise you but simply because your body is naive doesn't mean you have to be naive as well.
ReplyDeleteEvery pro was once a virgin so stopped being bothered about not being on cloud nine instantly. You both just need to be creative, explore various ways and discover which is the best for you and you build up on it as you progress. You mentioned fingering so I believe you already have an idea on which area excites you, gradually work on it.
All the best.
Some of us that got deflowered around age 20 are still learning how to orgasm 20 years later. You think you can master that in just a few days!!!
ReplyDeleteMy advice to you is to relax your mind and limit your expectation. It took me 20 years of 'experience' with different dicks and levels of emotional attachment to them to realise that the outcome of sex isn't and won't always be the same.
Your cycle also plays an important part.You may enjoy it more at certain times of the month. And when I said experience, it includes your partner's skills and experience. They are more experienced than one another.
Many women don't achieve orgasm and those that do can't swear they do each and every time. Even men, don't come all the time. Yet, this doesn't diminish the pleasure for women that don't.
I for one rarely come from vaginal penetration but nipple and clit orgasms are a sure banker.
Sis, focus more on going with the flow. Forget about the orgasms for now. Make sure the sex is not painful at least, and you and hubby should indulge in as much foreplay as possible.
You might also need to masturbate a little bit to understand your body better.
Google is your friend too. Some fruits and food taken in the right dose and at the right time also help. But , themore importantly, the whole experience is more psychological for women than it is physical) for men. If your hubby does things(both in and out of bed) that make you fall helplessly in love with him, you should orgasm better.
Please no masturbation
DeleteOne of the few sane male BVs on this blog. Much respect 🙌
ReplyDeleteSome women are suffering mehn, so you people that don't reach orgasm, how do you people cope?
ReplyDeleteIf you don't explode during sex that means you don't even squirt...WOW
Foreplay is very important during sex, lots of kissing and sucking. Pussy must be sucked with a finger inside the vagina gently caressing the g-spot.
Try sitting on his face while you suck his dick, that will get things started.
Make sure the dick doesn't go anywhere near the pussy till it's dripping with juices, you have to be literally begging to be banged.
Yes sex is amazing with the right partner, so much to teach you guus 🤦🏽♀️
Yimu. See who is talking. Like u achieve orgasm every day
Delete*guys*
ReplyDeleteBoth of you know nothing about pleasing yourselves talk more of eachother sexually. It's time for you both to put on your learning caps. And be patient with each other. I pray you married a man who is willing to go down this route with you else, sorry.
ReplyDeleteWhen some of us are tired of having multiple orgasm plus excessive squirting and milking.
I hope you get there someday. If not that's your luck.
My dear poster, nothing is wrong with you jor. I've been married for 6 years and have never had orgasm from penetrative sex o...I only get satisfaction from kissing, hubby sucking my right boob while fingering, he also sucks me down there. these are the only ways I get to hit orgasm o...So having this knowledge, hubby knows he has to do all these before he penetrates.
ReplyDeleteDear poster,
ReplyDeleteI also got married as a virgin too but @ 30, my wedding night was not funny...he waited patiently for that night and it was so painful even with KY jelly. He couldn’t stand I was in pain and stopped, he didn’t even want to do it anymore Cos I was in pain but we couldn’t help it as we’re attracted to each other, once he notices I’m in pain, he stops.
Eventually(months), I got used to having him inside me(missionary), it started to feel good...I decided it was time to switch it up and bring out “shanique”( my alter ego). Tried doggy and it hurt so bad (it still does but not as bad as before, especially if he gets carried away and starts banging me to BANGladesh).
I do not feel any pain when I’m on top and it drives him crazy * wink*, especially when I put it in reverse...
Summarily, Exploring different positions & places combined with a partner who absolutely adores you, tells you he loves you everyday after 4years knowing each other & 2years being married, would make it get better. Please, don’t forget KY jelly too and sex toys, especially a vibrator, he should torture your genital with till you climax.
Oh, I forgot to mention it got much better that I didn’t even know I was a squirter!!!
It takes time. It could take months before you orgasm. Your body has to get really relaxed and used to him, and you should both indulge in a lot of foreplay before any penetration. If you are both in love with each other, and you are both energetic and experimental it is bound to happen. Just wait for your body to get used to his. Still be affectionate with each other day to day outside of the bedroom. Hug and kiss each other everyday.
ReplyDeletePoster if you want to reach orgasm,be on top with you hubby kissing you and stimulating your nipples or suckling it ..you must surely reach organism
ReplyDeleteFor me when a man is on top me I cannot reach it until I ride then cloud 9 is my destination.
Thank me later.