TOO ALIKE IN A RELATIONSHIP
I have a question bvs. My boyfriend and I have been dating for 6 months. We are alike in a lot of ways.
We are both introverts.
When we are not going to the beach or cinema , we are at home watching movies, gisting, cooking or chatting.
My friend says this is not really healthy as we are too MuCH ALIKE. She said I ought to be with an extrovert. This is the most fulfilling relationship I have ever been but I am left wondering will this be a problem down the road?
My friend says this is not really healthy as we are too MuCH ALIKE. She said I ought to be with an extrovert. This is the most fulfilling relationship I have ever been but I am left wondering will this be a problem down the road?
BVs plz give me your opinions.
My dear there is nothing wrong with being alike at all,it is better to be alike in so many ways and have peace than to be different and not happy.
What does your friend even know about love sef?
And why are you already so worried?he has not proposed and may not,so enjoy yourself and learn what you have to learn about love and relationships!
And also try to create some fun things to do together,being an Introvert does not mean you stay indoors all day cooking and eating.....and gbenshing!
Whatever makes you happy please go for it
ReplyDeleteThis is the first time I am hearing that being alike is some kinda relationship "No No". See, enjoy the relationship while it last and if it doesn't, oh well,you did enjoy and learnt a thing or two.
DeleteThis kind of relationship carries a lot of peace and less misunderstanding. You better sit and enjoy ur life.
DeleteDon't enjoy your healthy relationship in peace o. Be looking for opinion upandan.
DeletePlease stop this "whatever makes you happy...'
DeleteSo if shooting people on the street makes you happy, you go for it
Having sex on the streets makes you happy, you go for it
Doing cocaine/heroin makes you happy, go for it?
Even smoking cigarette and storing cancer for yourself makes you happy go for it?
Hacking people's phone makes you happy go for it?
If suicide makes you happy you go for it?
Going into a bank's safe and emptying it makes you happy, go for it?
Please stop this rant before it becomes a dangerous mantra.
You're even watching movies together. Me and my husband will be at home pressing our phones, gisting and playing that's all. If we're using 1 month at home, that's how we will use it
ReplyDelete*Larry was here*
Seriously. My hubby and i are something else 🤣🤣😂😂. Gist, movie, romance, parent runs, phone pressing is our thing. Party no, outing no, terrible 😀 but makes us closer and each others bestie.
DeleteSo poster if you or guy isn't complaining, enjoy!
Bad belle friend.
ReplyDeleteezigbote bad belle friends,keep telling them about him,until you see your bobo wedding one of them.
DeleteWhen I met my now brother in Law and mother in law while I was staying with my friend, they both concluded after silently observing me for 1 year and half, that I act and have same mind set and personality with their last born son. They started plotting to get us to meet and from the first day we set our eyes on each other 6years ago till today we have never exchanged angry words. We agree in almost everything and very alike. I have never known it's possible to have this much stability and peace in marriage till I am living it.
DeletePoster, enjoy your relationship and guide it from those shallow friends of yours.
Positive comment from Saphire today 👏
DeleteStella steady hitting the nail on the head
ReplyDelete👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Your friend is a hater, so one person must be mad for a relationship to work.
DeleteThere are no rules to these things, just do what works for you guys and it seems to be working, so what is the matter?
I have been married for 7 years and we courted for 2 years. My wife and I are both introverts. People say we behave alike. We understand each other very well. She picks my non-verbal cues as if she could read my mind;I also pick hers.
DeleteA large chunk of my time outside work is spent with her. Ours is a near perfect marriage.
Don't listen to your friends. Set your priorities right. Communication and mutual understanding are very important in such a relationship.
19.44 Wishing you many more years of a fulfilling marriage 🙏
DeleteHmmm, you just want to tell us you have a great guy in your life. Why is your friend's opinion important to you, you plan on marrying her and your man too?
ReplyDeleteGod separate me from friends like this.
ReplyDeleteYou should discard what gives you peace of mind on top looking for extrovert??
Aunty, figure out what YOU really want.
By the time that friend of yours pushes you out of that peaceful relationship and takes over, your eye, brain and heart go clear. By that time you will understand the meaning of APC.
DeleteMust you listen to your friend? So as big as you are you don't know what's good for you. Your friend said both of you are alike and you're having bp. Na you sabi
ReplyDeleteThis one off me oooooo
DeleteDon't mind her.
DeleteIntrovert? Gisting and chatting???? Make i go check my dictionary again for introvert
ReplyDeleteShe said Introvert not deaf and dumb!
DeleteLmao @ Omeh
DeleteOmeh🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
DeleteAaaaaaaah Omeh haff vex 😂😂😂
DeleteOmeh don off me o🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
DeleteNo mind that one,introvert gisting,chatting,going to cinema and beach,Let me too go and check my Dictionary again,just say you enjoy each other company too much.
DeleteMy dear, your friend is in no position to tell you the kind of person you should be with. she is not you and not in the relationship with you, so her opinion shouldn't even count in this case.Esecially as the guy in question has no character flaw.Please be careful how you go about discussing your relationship with friends before you use your hand and ruin something beautiful.You guys are alike, and so what? You love each other and at peace with each other, I don't see a problem here.All the best.
ReplyDeleteE be like sey some pipu no like peace of mind.
DeleteThey are at it again 😂😂 frenemies.
ReplyDeletePoster, consider yourself lucky to have someone who is so like you...relationships thrive better that way.
Do not listen to your friend, you can be sure she'll hook up with him once you let him go.
Nuture and enjoy your relationship and I wish you the best.
Sluttychic.
Is there any problem here?
ReplyDeleteThe problem here is that, theres no problem... its too good to be true.
DeleteStellz..Lol @ and gbenshing. Hey poster, the common mentality people have is that opposites attract. The truth and reality is that opposites DO attract but they MUST have some fundamental similarities, for example;values, if not it gets irritating after sometime.
ReplyDeleteSo please enjoy your relationship. It's really nice to be with someone who GETS YOU. It's a great feeling.
For want of something different you guys can write a bucket list of adventurous stuff y'all want to do together... It will be so madd..
Tell me your age first, that's when I can be able to advice you properly.
ReplyDeleteLmao 😂 😂 😂 some people don't have a mind of their own.
DeleteHonestly, I don't see an issue here.
Sluttychic.
My husband and I are like this.We enjoy each other’s company and do everything together.My MIL complained so much when she visited,was begging us to make friends in our new country.My dear,both of you should do what works for you and make you happy.
ReplyDeleteStop telling your friends about your private life
ReplyDeleteWatch it, your friend may be jealous.
ReplyDeleteAnd if you're living in with this guy, stop. Just to avoid the problem chronicles. Close legs 🐤🐥
I pity you, be letting a friend advice you nonsense, next thing she will start texting him.
ReplyDeleteThat is exactly the type of husband you need someone calm that will give you peace. Not all those ones that go out to club/bar with friends daily and never sits at home. I have a friend who is very sociable, an extrovert and her husband is opposite. She set out to look for dat type of man in particular bcos WhatsApp guy men show her wennnn.
If you feel the relationship is boring, you can plan trips together. Do fun things 2geda, plan adventures yourself.
Stella i like the last word🤣
ReplyDeletePoster don't mind your friend you hear, enjoy your relationship.
Introverts gbenshing under halogen light..😎
ReplyDelete😁badoo
DeleteAs long as you are happy ,that's all.Fuck haters.
DeleteSis, this is what COMPATIBILITY is all about..the fact that you both are alike and yet you love it and find it fulfilling. Its beneficial to have similarities, sameness brings security and easy flow.
ReplyDeleteBut know that no matter how similar you both are, there will always be a difference cos that difference is what excites you about your significant other, not the similarities.
Even couples without much similarities eventually start rubbing off on each other over time. 😊
Poster better enjoy ur relationship in peace and don't listen to ur friends! There's absolutely nothing wrong in being alike in so many ways..it makes it more fun and interesting, when u spice it up wella! As far as it's working fine with both of u,u need not worry
ReplyDeleteDon't involve ur friends in ur relationship, most want what u have,so be discreet and don't disclose any details to them! I'm talking from experience
All d best
Shakespeare said.... You can win life by all means if you if you simply avoid 2 things: Comparing and Expectation.
ReplyDeleteEnjoy life.
Nothing to worry about here poster. I think its really cool you guys have a lot in common...makes things a lot easier.
ReplyDeleteBe careful of that friend if yours for am so sure she is eyeing your boyfriend. Don't discuss your relationship with friends again cos most don't wish you well. These type of friends will sleep with your man without apologies and even drag him with you My two cents
ReplyDeleteyour friend is jealous or your relationship. if u are very worried, hang out more often
ReplyDeleteYour friend has snatched your man in her head and she is trying to sow seeds of discord. She does not wish you well.
ReplyDeleteThis type of thing happened to my sister. She was dating her bf since school. He was about 8yrs older so he had started working in a bank. Doing very well. But the guy is the quiet type but he worships my sister like mad.
DeleteHe eventually proposed, we were getting ready for introduction one weekend. That is how my sister said she's not doing again. She had one stupid friend then that was even living with us practically,she's in our house mon-Fri for work. That friend was influencing her that the guy is not exciting,he's not even fine. Mind you this guy was doing well,bought his own home so my sister will be comfortable and all.
She returned his ring then at the age of 27. Till now my sister is 35 no single good guy comes around her. They just use and dump her. The guy is married with kids now. The friend too is also married. I know she regrets her decision but too proud to admit it.
Sad. Reminds me of one Superstory like that.......
DeleteMay the Lord bless your sister this year, amen.
Poster all I will tell you is there is no need fixing what ain't broke. Ok bye
DeleteChai! I feel bad for your sister sha. She and her friend, how close are they today?
DeleteI once advised my friend to leave a man she was dated but only because she told me she was unsure of her feelings and was having cold feet about marrying him as she was concerned she was marrying him out of family pressure as he also took care of her finances. I'm so glad she didn't listen to me as the man turned out to be a saintly husband. He gives her peace of mind and she's so happy with him. I would have felt bad for her if she had listened to me and remained single till now.
People, it's good to advise your friends but don't be the one the devil uses to ruin someone's life. Make sure there are serious flaws and you're giving the advice from a sincere heart.
Also, women, it's good to ask for your friend's opinion. But be aware that you, not your friend, will be the one affected by your decisions. In relationship matters, i've noticed it's best to keep certain things to oneself. If you must confide in someone, confide in your mother or father or a responsible older person.
Dont blame that friend...
DeleteIts the handwork of village people, they have to use somebody to get to you, at 27 no one can turn ur love against you just like that.
Omg @ 16:17!
DeleteSay it ain’t so!!!
Maybe your sister didn’t really like the guy in the first place
Nne, if your sister is a BV, how will she feel if she read this your comment?
DeleteShe rejected a guy. Big deal. I know ladies who made the decision your sister made and still got married and have had kids. Maybe she was not attracted to him. Maybe there were things she and her friends observed that you are not privy to. Maybe she was just not ready for marriage. Maybe the man is not God's wish for her.
She's 35 and haven't found love. She no kill person. I hope you people don't use this situation to insult her. I pray that her story will change this year. May she marry someone that will make all of you open mouth in amazement at how wonderful he is.
18:12 please, stop this train of thought.
DeleteShe shared her sister's experience as a learning point for others.
People get influenced by their friends.
My female cousin tried that with me but I later found out she was jealous and she openly confessed she always felt I would be better than her in life (as if we were in competition).
My elder sister's childhood friend and her hubby discouraged her boyfriend from getting married to her because he doted on her (very generous to all his friends). My sister's married a woman he didn't love and when he filed for divorce, he suddenly died prematurely 2 days to the final judgment.
Please, *people should make important/life-changing decisions based on their personal fasting and prayers to God* not from mere human counsel.
They could also seek counsel from a neutral godly person far removed from their own sphere.
Your friend is just being jealous
ReplyDeletePoster everyone including your friends will have their opinions. The question for you is, what is your inner conviction? Don't let people drag you in different directions because you don't know what you want. It is the fastest way to end up nowhere fast.
DeleteLol
ReplyDeleteIs ur friend an extrovert?
If yes then your introvert boyfriend will be perfect for her don't you think?
Abeg don't listen to her.Theres nothing wrong with an introvert being with an introvert, extrovert or whoever.
Abeg stay away from your friend. Don't tell her any of your gist abeg!
ReplyDeleteYou dnt Have a Problem oo.. If You Like Throw-away what other babes are looking For..
ReplyDeleteHanty you no get problem. Do you jare, you call the shots here not your friend. continue to enjoy your'peace'with this man and see where it leads Biko.
ReplyDeleteHappy new year, my lovelies!
ReplyDeleteSweetheart, don't be too quick to accept clichès. Remember, these clichès are originally some people's opinions on certain issues. Just because they sound poignant and thought-provoking doesn't mean they apply to everyone. Even in cases of general rules, exceptions still exist. I'll give you an example. You know this trite phrase "age is nothing but a number"? Let's see how much of a believer you are when your 21 year old son brings home a 45 year old woman as his fiancee or your 23 year old daughter bring home a 71 year old man as the love of her life. Let's see how philosophical you will be. When it hits home, you will then realise that these phrases aren't absolute and shouldn't be accepted as "gospel", they are relative and not absolute.
Darling, the phrase "opposites attract", is usually true but not ALWAYS true. There are cases where opposites don't mesh together. You may date an extrovert who would find you boring with zero fire in your belly. You will end up having inferiority complex issues which will even make you crawl deeper into your shell. Baby, "if it ain't broke, don't fix it". Stick with what or who works, don't go chasing waterfalls.
Here's a salient advice, perhaps, keep your relationship out of kitchen table top discussions with your friends. Some issues are best regarded as no go areas. Sweetie, aren't you the one in the relationship? How then would you allow a friend's opinion hold sway over your relationship. It's either, deep down, you don't feel the right connection though you claim you do or you really don't know what you want. Do some major soul searching and be sure he is really who you want. Don't use the "my friend said" excuse to voice how you really feel.
If you are sure you want him, ignore people's opinions and do you. Your relationship may be giving some of your "friends" major palpitations and sleepless nights. This may just be another case of "divide the child" a la King Solomon's judgement. Some "friends" don't want you in a happy relationship if they aren't in one themselves. Sweetie be vigilant and learn to have a mind of your own.
e-hugs and kisses.