STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
AGE DIFFERENCE IN MARRIAGE
Good day madam Stella, please I need your advice with the bvs...
Good day madam Stella, please I need your advice with the bvs...
I am a girl of 28 years old in a relationship with a man of 45 years old .he is single, caring, God fearing,everything a Lady want in a man,but the issue is that I am concerned about the age gap and if there will be implications in future .finally ,does age really matters in marriage?
please madam Stella I will want you to use your red pen.thank you .
*Age is nothing but a number my dear if you find the one who matches you,both of you will flow well...Some people start well ad later the age issue becomes a problem,the young wife wants to go out to parties,meet people and enjoy,the old tired hubby wants to sit at home,eat,gbensh and sleep..
If the age means so much to you then find someone else abeg you,otherwise enjoy ....
Wait oh,has he proposed or you are assuming?
Good luck to you baby but people will talk ooo.. Hope you have a thick skin
ReplyDeleteThis isn't a problem at all as long as he loves and adore you
DeleteAt 45 and not married before?
DeleteConfirm it is not a red flag
Go and PRAY!!!
GOD still answers and hears prayers
which yeye red flag @Jet Li, nne if you love the guy please go ahead with relationship. The older the better lolz
DeleteDear poster age is not always an issue depending on your man's health and looks but how sure are you this man is not already married somewhere. Most men his age deceive women they are single while they are not. Look well before you leap.
ReplyDelete👌
DeleteSo true
DeleteIn our world today, age does not matter. What matters is that both of you love each other crazy, respect each other, great communication and compatibility.
ReplyDeleteThe older, the better. Enjoy your relationship and stop worrying about age.
Age has nothing to do with Love. When I say "love" I am not talking about "sex" like most people think. I am talking about unconditional love.
ReplyDeleteAs you can see, you have already attached conditions to your love for this man; you want to reverse his age?
Well, lets talk about other conditions most (Naija) girls attach to marriage. Note that I said "Naija girls not Nigerian women" for they are different.
Those conditions;
Abroad, Doles money like ATM, sexual prowess (meaning they don chop forbidden fruit with fork), houses and cars, professions and so on.
So perhaps, this man does not have any of the above, so the age could become an issue (for Naija girls, not Nigerian women).
Please ask yourself ajujus -do I love this man unconditionally?
If you don't, please leave him alone and do not complicate his life. If you do, invite us for the wedding. But please prepare for marriage and
not wedding (day).
😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊
Shut up please!
DeleteYour comments are damn irritating. No advice whatsoever just judgemental & hypocritical !
@15:44
DeleteMake I shut up?
🤐🤐🤐🤐🤐🤐
Sure you don dey happy now? 😊😊😊
Any other command?
Judgmental and hypocritical -I don read those lines before
find another line of insults and thanks immensely for the insults inugo?
😊😊😊
And you did not see any piece of advice in my last paragraph?
Ajuju ooo
Ooops, she says I should shut 🤐🤐🤐
You need to get your head examined asap! You are too judgemental. Madame over righteous bigot.
DeleteOver righteous bigot?
DeleteYooo, you don search dictionary manufacture another one?
Ahaa better to use new insults instead of old ones 😊😊
Thank you very much for the insults and may the Lord have mercy on
your soul inugo? 😊😊😊
@15:44 That was rude! Why tell ANG shut up?
DeleteRead her comment again. She advised the poster on things to should guide her.
Make your own comment without being insolent.
Why attack Ang... yes, her post at times might not be what you'll like to hear or read, just read and scroll down. Let her air her opinion too. Remember we are all visitors here, na her own opinion she share, she no kill person. haba you all should let her be kwanu.
DeleteLittle reference to past issues are fine
DeleteBut compiling old chronicles and repeating them in summary
Over and over is sometimes tiring
Advice
Move on
You are not a 'girl's of 28 years.
ReplyDeleteYou are a woman.
If you don't know that, at that age, there's a problem.
Big one at that.
'girl's [sic.] of 28...?'
DeleteThe way you girls slap English mmmhh
Maybe you are a GIRL of 28
Is that the advice anon 15:07? The way you people shove age down womens' throat is stupid. Archaic mindset.
DeleteI am a girl of 35,lol
DeleteE no concern anybody
What if she mistakenly typed it? Itk.
DeleteYour happiness matters most, if you're at peace with him ,then go ahead
ReplyDelete*Larry was here*
My dear, the age difference will always cause a problem but if he is mature enough to let down his guard once in a while your relationship will stand the test of time. But you also have to start thinking like an adult and let go of petty things.
ReplyDeleteWhat is wrong with a 45 year old man. If you see people who are after 40 you will be surprised and call them 20.
ReplyDeleteBetter enjoy your relationship and make it work by putting God as the Head of the family
Is he talking marriage? Or u are already faster than your shadow...
ReplyDeleteHope his family is not in another state coz its kinda Wierd that at 45 he's single, anyway some men are chronic bachelors.
Good observation. Also please know if he is the type that is domineering. Cos some men like this when they are much older than you, den go dey find respect from you like food. You can't advice them, you have no right to be upset and everything would b done their way or the high way . Be sure of his character
DeleteYes oo, chronic bachelors do exist. Eg is my ex. He clocked 45 last month and still single dey flex dey go. Lol
DeleteA single never been married man at 45? Sis look well well please, age gap is not the main thing to look at here, SHINE YA EYE.
ReplyDeleteYes,look well before you put yourself into what you will later regret. But if its true he is single and available, nothing about the age.
ReplyDeleteThe mature the better. If you want to wait for youngie you may wait for a longer time. All the best.
Age ain't nothing in marriage,just be sure he is the right one for you.
ReplyDeleteI am dating an older guy and it can be a bit awkward ...that's the truth. I know money is involved but if you can take everything that this relationship would bring then go ahead
ReplyDeleteIt is basically a number. I think its mostly about how both parties approach it . For me I am even more concerned about why this 45yr old man has been unmarried till now.
ReplyDeleteExactly
DeleteYou have to really do a thorough investigation on the man. A man of 45years un married?
ReplyDeletePlease search your heart deeply to be sure you won't have a problem with the gap LATER, if its a chronicle then its bothering you!!
ReplyDeleteWhen you are 40 he will be 57
DeleteCan you deal?
My big question you should ask yourself is why is a man of 45 still single? Did he marry before or something but for a man not to be married at that age should give you great concern i will advise you to know more about him before marriage comes in.
ReplyDeletePlease dnt marry him, me that my husband is 12 yrs older with pot belly, i cnt even hav sex wit him. He is 39 by the way. I miss my sch boyfriend that is 4 yrs older bt he is married alrdy.
ReplyDeleteWhen you were gbenshing him,you did not ask us this yeye question...why now?
ReplyDeleteHas he proposed?
Dont you love him anymore?
Abeg do whatever you like because it's your life and you should know what's best for you.
is he not too old not to be married? do u know the reasons why he is not married till now or is he codedly married
ReplyDeleteVery good question
DeleteMarry him if you love him. By the time you are in your mid 30s and single, even 60 will be okay for you.
ReplyDeleteTalking from experience.
Lies! I was 36 and rejected a 52 year old because of age difference. I married a 39 year old 18months after. I don't know where this idea comes from that 30s and unmarried=lower standards and misery. Hiss!
DeleteAnon 15:40. That would doesn't mean everyone would. I'm 36 and single but unwilling to settle for lesser than I deserve. Don't let society rob you of making a good choice all because you are "old".
Delete👌i like your comment you have high standards. While talking experience low standards
DeleteSee all the mummy, aunties, ladies, women and girls in the house saying age is not a problem because it's a younger girl that wants to marry an older man. If it was a 28 years old man that wanted to marry a 45 years old woman what will be the advice from the women in this platform. And do note I am not against the lady being with a 45,50,55,60 years old man oo
ReplyDeleteYour happiness matters alot. But make very sure he takes your advice and council. Some men will want to call it childish. Always let him see you as equal. Thank you
ReplyDeletePoster life is all about choice, I prefer older men than younger guys. If you love him, will respect him, his look is not showing he is old. Marry him but hope you are sure the man will not bully you due to age? Find out very well if he hasn't be married before, hope he I not broke reasons he has been single? Hope you too is not because he is rich that is why you want to marry him.
ReplyDeleteAsk yourself questions will i still find this man attractive in the next 20 years, will this man still be able to drive me wide in bed in 20 years to come?
You don't have to tell friends and family members how old is your man. You both should keep your age story to yourselves. Goodluck on your choice.
Madam this man is already old. Accept u r a reserved person. Look for someone younger. Also what are his achievements at 45 years. So u don't use your youth to be taking care of the entire family
ReplyDeleteMarry him if you see his achievement at that age, if not I don’t know o.. what did he use all that time for?
ReplyDeletePoster I thought you wanted to say a girl of 20.
ReplyDeleteCome on quickly marry that man as long as he has no children & money wahala(from previous relationships). He should be free from hangover relationships & all.
Me I'm a lady of 32+ & about to marry my 48yrs old fiancée.
All you need is love & cash flow,even the sex is overrated. My man is a typical romantic soft guy & that suits me to the core,(what I have always wanted) after having some experience with some wicked troublesome men I'm most grateful to God for sending me my own man.
So no take wetin people go talk spoil your own blessing o.
age is not just a number, poster what exactly do you want?
ReplyDeleteThey say the older the better but 'ayam' not seeing any better in my own oo. He's 14 years older.
ReplyDeleteFew days back we were having a discussion and from no where Mr man said "if not for marriage, you can't see me on the road and say hi, talk more of disrespecting me". I immediately reminded him how I never wanted to marry him but he spoke with those I respect to convince me to marry him cos he knows I ordinarily won't look his way for him to say hi sef 🙄🙄
Not all older men have sense so think am well and choose wisely.
Good reply. What rubbish.
DeleteUna see am. You guys should be talking there. Everyone claiming to know better. There is no one approach to this thing called marriage. People even change in the course of the marriage. Do you and be happy.
DeleteThe age gap is huge oo! In the next 10 years you would still be very young and his health issues may be too much for you. Think well sha!
ReplyDeletesee as your are wishing the man ill health.
DeleteNot every old person has health issues abeg.
Make sure you really are in love with him and not just trying to get married before you hit 30. Make sure you will be happy to wake up and see his face first thing in the morning and last thing at nights. If he makes you tingle with happiness and you cannot think of a life without him in it then marry him. God is the giver of long life and good health, he could outlive you and never ever have a sickness.
ReplyDeleteTrue,I was married to an older man before,it didn't end well,there are times I feel like smashing his face,love n marriage is 2 different things
DeleteAge is nothing but a number, the age gap between hubby and my self is 12 years...but he's like my God sent,his type is very rare...so if your loves you,pls go for him
ReplyDeleteI am 31 and husband is 46, he left his previous marriage with a son and he married me when i was 25 and he was 39. we have two beautiful sons, he is the most caring, responsible and understandinv man , no cheating on me . he takes me and his children as priority. I even ride him a lot , and he says its because hes older thats why am riding him. and the sex? oh so good. he is a 45 mins man😀but not so romantic, he is open to teaching tho. study him well and dont let anyone discourage you. all my friends telling me not to marry him then because he is not too handsome are still not married till date. age is nothing but a number
ReplyDeleteDear poster! If you love him, you can go ahead. My own is 14yrs difference though I was not aware initially just knew like 2weeks to wedding. Thought he was just 10yrs older. The lies, lack of ambition, the gray hairs, his pot belly makes me resent him. It has made me to have extra marital affairs. So if you love him very well, go ahead if not look for someone else.
ReplyDeleteFrom your write up, you are bothered about the age likewise how I was during my time. Prefer to struggle with young bobo than struggling with old man.
Nne don't mind all these age is just a number sayings!!
ReplyDeleteNa when you don enter finish ee go clear for your eyes!!
I will advise you marry him if he is super duper wealthy, and mega generous, he is crazy about you and madly in love with you and everything about you!
Yes I said it!!!
Borrow sense from Regina Daniels.
No be all older men a young girl deh sign forever with biko!
When I mean wealthy, I am not talking about the type some uninformed/naive ladies categories as being wealthy eg "he gives me monthly money of 100k, buys me hair,bags yen yen yen!!
You can always afford yourself these stuffs with time given your age, So it won't be a good reason to tie your future to an older man.
The wealthy I mean is this!!
Marrying him will forever change your status in life!
It will open doors and put you in places you never thought you will reach!!
You will be closing deals and have investments that run in millions just by being associated with him.
Your unborn children will inherit wealth and legacy their papa created!
When normal marriage crisis hit, you console yourself with money.
With his wealth, when health crisis hits, you can at least afford the best healthcare in any part of the world!
Now that is how to marry an older man for a girl that young!!
Think am well!
No allow short sightedness push you into long thing!
Well said! 100 gbosaaa for this ur comment
DeleteYou this babe @17:58!🤣🤣🤣
DeleteOh my! Your comment got me ROTFL.
Well, you have a point about not being naive to categorize wealthy as eg "he gives me monthly money of 100k, buys me hair,bags yen yen yen!!"
Every lady should work/do business and be able to afford what they need.
What you failed to consider is that nobody or wealth can determine the future and how a spouse would behave in marriage tomorrow.
Poster, you are already concerned about the age gap. If it bothers you now, it would bother you 10 years down the line. Go with your gut feeling.
Be sure this man is not married. If he is single, he might have a child or children from different women and keep it from you.
Write down what you have in common and why you would want to marry this man.
17 years is almost 2 decades.
Thank u
DeletePoverty talking.
DeleteIs it that some of you write yourselves off to the extent that only a man can get you to a level of having investments?
itong
DeleteIt differs for different people. I dated a guy 7 years older than I am when I was 25, we were great together alright, but he hardly took my advice or heeded to my warnings because he probably felt I was too young or inexperienced to advice him. Whenever we had arguments, he’ll say things like “you must think I’m 25”. I had to leave. The suppression was too much. Maybe it was him. Like I said people differ. Personally, I feel age gap has the tendency to affect a relationship, depending on you too sha.
ReplyDeleteAt 28, you should be going as a 2nd wife. He must be a loser to be single at 45. Even at that if he is well to do, he should be going for 21-25. Stay away from him. You will regret it. Any man above 40 who is eyeing ladies 28-40 has nothing to offer. He has tried in life and is looking for someone to suffer with him. What big boy of that age will be looking at afternoon paper when the beautiful ones are not even born yet
ReplyDeleteSee reasoning! Chai
DeleteAt 28, you are still referring to yourself as a girl. SMH. In 2 months, you will be 29. Then 30. It is your life. If it bothers you, don't marry him and stop disturbing us. We won't live your life for you.
ReplyDeleteIf you are really sure he has a good heart and loves you then go for it. The people who are talking today will be the ones hailing both of you by Time you turn 30 to 40. You know how women age faster than men. You will look young no matter your age when standing beside him at old age.
ReplyDeletePoster dont be so excited oh..that age difference is a lot oh. Dont allow just love love..Does he allow you express yourself? Does he shut you down?? Also listen to his unspoken words?? be very cateful..open your eyes and love with your brain..
ReplyDeleteAge difference doesn't really matter, but be sure he loves you and vice versa.
ReplyDeleteAge is a number.
ReplyDeleteAge is but a number.
ReplyDelete