STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
CONFUSED
Dear Stella,
A friend came to me seeking for advice on what to do as she is currently in a 4 year relationship but not currently staying with her Fiancè who engaged her after 3 years right before he left for another country.
Now a year running and she has met a man who is 19 years older than her and is serious about being with her(in love with her) and ready to settle with her.
Right now she is confused cos her long term relationship boyfriend has hacked her phone and knows everything between her and the other guy and is using against her. And she believes she is in love with the new guy and would like to spend the rest of her life with him.
However, she is confused between the two due to the time they have been together. If she should stay with her fiance or break up for the new man.
Thanks
Thanks
*How did the guy hack her phone from abroad?
I dont believe this,someone around her must be giving him info on her activities..is it you or is this chronicle yours?
You have been engaged for just a year and cannot evn stay Faithful?or didnt i Understand your explanation?
How long will you be in love with the new guy,if you cant even stay Faithful to the Other guy?
Just break it already and go to whoever you wanna be with...You did not give us any solid reason why you want to switch from one man to another,this is serial behaviour,asawo dey your body!
The new man is 19 years older, how old is the poster? Why hasn't the new guy married or is he divorced?
ReplyDelete*Larry was here*
That's how they will be sending in their own chronicles claiming its for a friend. How come you know so much, I hope you're not the monitoring demon giving the one abroad info? 16years age difference is nothing na, who Regina ask before she make her choice, abeg waiting for the next chronicle tomorrow biko...
DeleteGuy a girl of 21 years who's dating a guy like Omashola is within the same age gap.Now the question should be why would a man wait for this long to settle down and not assuming he's divorced.
DeleteIn the case of Omashola I'm sure we all saw why he's still single at his age and(Sorry to say)I pity the lady that would risk spending the rest of her life with him cos the day small quarrel go happen she'd be sold for less than a kobo.
19years is all I see. I'm sure the guy is rich
DeleteBeing nineteen years older shouldn't be much of a big deal and YES there are men who are in their late thirties to early fourties who have never been married a clear case study would be someone Like Omashola from the just concluded BBN dating a 21year old girl.
DeleteThe question should rather be,What held you back from settling down for so long and why you'd all of a sudden decide it's time to take the bull by horn which in most times when you do a little investigation into the life of the man would see a messed up pattern.
Imagine a sweet,innocent,naive 21years old lady deciding to spend her life with someone like Omoshola you'd only expect that she'd be ripped of every ounce of self esteem she has owning my by his repeated tradition of bad mouthing ladies anytime he feels he's not cool with her/her act.
Someone that is invading your privacy (hacking of phone) is not one you should be with but some people will argue that if he didn’t do that he wouldn’t find out you are two timing.
ReplyDeleteI don’t agree with both of you (hacking and cheating) but you are an adult and should do what’s best for you. People fall out of love all the time but it’s how you deal with it that determines how it ends. If you or your friend no longer like the man that engaged her then she should let him go since he already knows so they don’t end up getting married out of pity or to patch things.
Don’t marry someone who would use something you did in the past to hunt you for the rest of your life. Most men never know how to handle a cheating partner, they will bring it up every opportunity they get and you’d end up resenting him for it or each other.
Simple. No man who claims to love you would hack your phone. And I don’t understand, have they been engaged for 3 years or a year? I wouldn’t even still advice her to leave her bf for another man. I guess the fact that he’s 19 years older than her makes her think she’s meeting a matured man who’s ready to settle.... but dear not all of them are serious. If she wants to leave her present bf, I don’t think it should be bc a much older man is asking her out hence she thinks he’s not capable of also wasting her time.
DeleteThe best way to handle a cheating partner is to drop them after their indiscretion. Anything else may be done out of convenience
DeleteDoppel and anon 15:47.
DeleteYoure both not serious!!!
He shouldnt hack a phone if he senses foul play? Who analyzed that?
Whats the difference between snooping and phone hacking? Since hes not here to snoop, wat do u expect him to do?
Poster follow this advise.
DeleteSince youre so much in love, theres no reason to snoop as well.
DeleteNa so una de succeed de carry ex boyfriend first son give husband to train.
Come back when you're ready to say the truth. I no get time for "them say".
ReplyDeleteStella say this is serial behaviorππashawo de your bodyπππchoi
DeleteAshawo really de plenty nigerian girls body, sadly they dont know.
DeleteNaija girls!
ReplyDeleteOnce abroad is involved, they get "confused"
You are chanting "love, love" for the new guy and at the same time confused?
Seems you do not understand what love means.
When love is unconditional, there is only one object of that love; just like in the case of one who is following Christ not because of what
she can get from him but because of whom he is!
So if you say "love" for the second man, then there is none for the first man left... only infatuation of perhaps "abroad".
Jisie ike inugo?
Thank you ANG, too many shallow brained girls in nigeria.
DeleteFirst time, you made sense. You can only love one person at a time aunty
DeleteEeeeehhhhh?
DeleteFeminist come under my comment no shoot arrows? ππ
Jesus coming is truly very close. Chegharia nu
➕➕
I will tell you this; never marry someone who can go as far as hacking your phone. Such a person doesn't trust you and is a ticking time bomb.
ReplyDeleteLol. The one collecting ponron up and down is not a ticking time bomb? Maybe she has given him reason to suspect her of infidelity, and here we are with proof that she is, in fact, a cheat. No word of admonition for the lot, but the catcher of the liar. Shege π
DeleteAnother cheat spotted.
DeleteIf ur hands are clean will he have a reason to hack your phone?
admonition for the *liar
DeleteAshewo
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteHow come she fell for another man while engaged?
Is her fiancΓ© not ready to settle anytime soon? Did he just engage her to tie her down for his selfish reasons?
How did he get to hack her phone? Was all that necessary? Or has she been cheating on him with other men?
If she decides to stick with her fiancΓ©, he’ll never trust her....that’s one of the reasons so many marriages/relationships crash. Is she prepared to be under serious scrutiny for life? What does lack of freedom do to people?
She’s not a loyal person and cannot be faithful. She should free her fiancΓ© and go with the other man. Even if she decides to let the other man go, she’d cheat on her fiancΓ© with another.
Thank you. I dont know about the new guy, but the fiance just engaged her to tie her down. He didn't engage her since na just before im travel. Meanwhile, as he now knows you're cheating, he'll string u along till it's time to marry then his mother will find one mgbeke for him from the village.
DeleteEngagement no be marriage
Lol @ how did he hack her phone from abroad? It's probably the line he 'hacked', not the phone itself. Its not impossible. As long as you have someone's number, it can be done.
ReplyDeleteLine oh, phone oh, sim card oh.... it was sha hacked.
DeleteHaaa!! Stella don tire to advice..Hmm Poster just say its you no need beating about the bush...You are not in love with any of them so dont create a quagmire for yourself...Choose a simple life and stop building a web of pain, tears and hurt...Someone close to you spilled the beans, there was no hacking...
ReplyDeleteHacked = Her fiancΓ© knows her Facebook pw.
ReplyDeletePoster is the "no good alone, must be with a man" type.. You know, the type that can't handle long distance relationship.
Just go with your older boo, you already checked out of your relationship before you sent in this chronicle. We await your follow up after he's done with you.
A man nineteen years older than you. Is that what you really want? Are you being desperate or is he that wealthy to make you think this way. I don't believe your guy hack your phone, maybe you are the one giving him the lead you are seeing someone else. In as much as I can't guarantee a distance relationship like yours ending in marriage, one year is too early to panic about your engagement.
ReplyDeleteAll I will say is that, you should look carefully before you leap. The grass is not always greener on the other side. Just like Celine Dion would say; "Baby think twice before you close that door"
Just curious, what’s the problem with him being 19 years older. I genuinely want to know
Delete@Rambo, I didn't say there's something wrong with the age difference rather I only asked if that's what she really wants sincerely from the heart or desperation led her to it.
DeleteI don't think there's anything wrong with the age difference tho we don't know how old the 2nd man is and how old the poster friend is so we can't conclude on that... What does your friend really want? i don't know what to advice the poster self... i will read comment.
DeleteI don't even have one
ReplyDeleteWe are africans, 1 year engagement is too much. They had already dated for 3 years, that makes it 4 years. Some engagements are just to tie you down.
ReplyDeleteHas your fiancΓ© discussed marriage plans yet? Broach the subject, get a definitive response or take a walk to the new guy to get married. Don't enter another 365days engagement again o.
1 year is not too mch anythg jo, dont u have self control?
DeleteWho and you are "we are Africans"?
DeleteGbamest point.
DeleteGod bless you Anon ππ
Make she carry her cross...
ReplyDeleteHer colleagues with the mindset of "dont put all ur eggs in one carton" should advice her
Lmao at colleagues.πππ
DeleteWhy do i feel attacked? ππ
Babe feel free.its your life.do what makes you happy.if staying with the new guy makes you happy,I am fully in support.people should learn to understand others.how oga go engage person for three good years without plans.?!stella stop saying "asawo " behavior.
ReplyDeleteDo you have sense at all? Which 3yrs? So lets assume he didnt have plans, did they tie her rope there? Cant you quit officially before opening another leg, i mean door??
DeleteStella oh..lol
ReplyDelete4 years relationship and 3 years of engagement is really a long time. Are you sure he is ready for marriage? If the new guy is ready to get married to you please go ahead.
ReplyDeleteNo Pat, Four years in all .... three years coutship + one year of being engaged if I read right.
DeleteIn all,the relationship is 4 yrs::::::; na wetin you dey sit down wait dey look ehhhh?
DeleteNa so Dem dey take waste person time when you no be baby. Pikin of four years don start school.
If your abroad bobo never ready to marry,why get you engaged?
You need to first clear your head about your abroad Fiance before thinking about this older bobo wey dey scatter your head. Your fiance hand no clean,abi why he dey hack your phone? insecurity want kill am for where him dey
Abeg, No rush matter ooo else you go rush out with regrets
This chronicle is not complete at all. Poster you filtered a lot of information that should have been helpful to know how to advise you.
ReplyDeleteThe only thing she filtered is that shes fucking the old man
DeleteMarry who you love because the abroad guy may waste your time finish and sill not marry you. So follow your heart.
ReplyDeleteSimple. No man who claims to love you would hack your phone. And I don’t understand, have they been engaged for 3 years or a year? I wouldn’t even still advice her to leave her bf for another man. I guess the fact that he’s 19 years older than her makes her think she’s meeting a matured man who’s ready to settle.... but dear not all of them are serious. If she wants to leave her present bf, I don’t think it should be bc a much older man is asking her out hence she thinks he’s not capable of also wasting her time.
ReplyDelete"No man who claims to love you would hack your phone".... na so una de carry another man pikin dash innocent men, cheaters all over!!!!
DeleteMy dear, the phone can be hacked trust me! Happened to me. It was hacked from one abroad to the other abroad. I was surprised because my phone was with me all tnrough. An iphome for that matter. I raised dustbwith ipjone but they couldn't come up with any tangible excuse!
ReplyDeleteposter what do i have to say when i don't understand your reasons for browsing different website.
ReplyDeleteMake your choice and pick the best one.
Discuss extensively with the abroad guy so as to know his plan towards wedding plan. If it is not feasible consider the new guy with ur legs close and padlock.
ReplyDeleteThere are lot of hypocrites on this blog. With one side of the mouth you say it’s okay to snoop on you’re partners phone, with the other you say a man who loves you won’t hack your phone. This is what overwatching of ZeeWorld causes, low mentality.
ReplyDeleteThe simple truth is the chronicler is a cheat. Since you say your abroad guy knows I’m befuddled as to why you think you still have a future with him. Perhaps he’s willing to overlook that owing to how long you guys have been apart, but again, collecting side drew is totally different than loving the side drew and considering marriage with him.
Good luck in whatever choice you make. Your chronicle is really weird
People here are hypocrites.. they want to snoop on their guy but ant take been snooped on.
DeleteYou dey mind them? Awon “rules for thee, but not for me”. Take their words serious at your own peril.
DeleteComplete hypocrites on this blog, they only think of what suits them and at that particular time, they all snoop oh, yet they want their phones off limit.... yimu.
DeleteStay faithful, they cant.
I hope Naija girls are finding Stella's red pen entertaining and instructive? ππ
ReplyDeleteOyibo asupu!
Ngwanu, make una send ya thunders and gunshots and see America wonder...
Ya comments go enter that place una call "sperm!"
ππππππ
Still don't understand how someone would be engaged for a year. From the way this chronicle sounds, wedding preparations have not started sef. Stop accepting engagement rings if you know you're not getting married within at most 8 months to avoid stories that touch.
ReplyDeleteI see nothing wrong with what her fiance did though. He did what we advise women on this blog to do. I'm just surprised the man still wants to be married to her when he discovered she's cheating. I think she should just end the relationship and move to the man she's in love with as she has no feelings for her fiance. Besides, i see the fiance doing things to punish her if the relationship should continue.
There's the risk that the new man is using her to play too. He may just have a wife and kids somewhere. Just saying.
Poster next time, if you know your partner will be travelling you need to discuss how long you can wait for
ReplyDeleteIt feels like your friend has checked out of the previous relationship so no need comparing. The age and length of time your friend has known the new guy is irrelevant.
My friend came off a long term relationship in Dec 2017 by Jan 2018 she started talking to someone else by April new guy proposed.
If you like propose under 3days, does it guarantee happy marriage? In your mind now, she has hit jackpot.
DeleteStella u are really crazy oooπ. Ashawo dey ur bodyπ π π π
ReplyDeleteStella u are really crazy ooo��. Ashawo dey ur body��������
ReplyDeleteWaka pass.
ReplyDeleteThe guy must have bought her the phone and hacked it over here before he gave it to her.
ReplyDeleteHe sees every call and chat coming into her phone. He can hear every damn conversation. I think he just wanted to know the type of woman he is getting married to. Do you blame him? I do not blame the Man because she is a cheat anyway.
She should follow her heart.
ReplyDeleteNo need for long talk. If you're sure about this your elderly boo, follow him. Trust is broken between you and your abroad boo and it will be hard to get past it, that's if you see him again.
ReplyDeleteStella,you red pen sometimes sha. See savage. ha ha ha
ReplyDelete