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Saturday, September 14, 2019

Amebo Colmun - When Your Boss Is A Woman Wahala Dey...

It takes a certain level of grace to work in peace with a woman.





I recall a former boss would ask her driver to park two blocks away from the building and she then walks, removes her heels by the stairs and tiptoes upstairs to catch anyone who's unnecessarily happy that the sun is shinning!


Infact, it was wise to give her radius when she's asking you a question because the way she swings slap is not funny o!

She once called a married man of 4 kids brainless in our meeting because the man could not pronounce an Edo client's name properly and the dude stutters normally o! 

Rotfl.


She began detesting her PA because the innocent girl would give heads up on her movement and shockingly, one of the staff went to snitch to the boss that the PA was the source and Boss stopped sharing her complete calender with her and her face was a constant slapping board!

In all of these, the HR was not exempted o! Kai if she starts with the man like this, just know say transfer of aggression is on the way.


The HR was a very partial man sef without any iota of integrity. Imagine, two female staff dating the same dude in the company had a face off and he favoured the one from his village over the other!

He was soo tribalistic and disliked pretty girls! Laff wan kee me die abeg! I could not phantom his reasons until the day i saw the picture of his hippopotamus looking wife, I understood his frustrations in getting himself a beautiful woman! Yeye!

I soo hated working there as her constant screams was a nightmare. It was like having a combo of Patience ozorkwo and Lola Idije garnished with Sola Sobowale's movie characters living in ONE SINGLE BODY!


Boss would particularly give preference to two ladies who were born and breed in the abroad. She would pack them with her for meetings with clients because of their poshness and classy rides! It was usually a beautiful entourage to behold on any arrival!

When God caught her like this, a big client insisted he wanted one of the abroad gehz to single handedly handle the multi-million naira worth project.






Oga Madam returned to the office fuming! She left the driver at the meeting venue o! Snatched her car keys and drove down to the office. Her driver arrived with the two le poshes!


It turned out the client had eyes for the rounder posh geh who had her own complimentary card (when the rest of us were still sleeping on a bicycle) and gave to the client at a business summit she accompanied madam to some months earlier in Abuja.

At the event while flirting, she had to introduce madam who approached the buffet area unexpectedly.

Long story short, he linked madam just to retain access with the posh babe...

So now, client said he no want madam as a company to handle the contract but wants the posh babe alone with her choice of teammates!


Kai... see wetin accent and poshness do this geh. Madam wey her leg long pass tortoise threatened le posh not to try boycott her company because madam's friend was the one who invited madam to the summit to meet bigger clients and she had been hinted earlier that the particular client would be in attendance.

Anyways, not too long, le posh and her friend left our office on a bad note to do their own thing!


The rest of us had to suffer for their actions as, every outing with oga, you must not look finer than her o! Infact, If the client greets you, just do sign language! Your job na to carry bag, folder and remember how many concubines solomon had with their names and dates of birth!

If you cannot find what she needs in the folder in time - since she cannot slap you publicly, she would ask why you came with a truckload of dumbness and ask you to go and wait outside. Imagine your shoe doing koi..koo..koi..koo on your way out because one heel sole has swallowed gravel. Imagine the embarrassment. Plus you must never forget to carry vex money with you o! As your ride back to the office is NEVER guaranteed.


There was only one dude in the entire office madam does not yell at including myself anyways . Infact, there were speculations that they were lovers. Reason the two fish brain gehz were fighting over him as he was their immunity ticket from madam's thunderstorm!


My own case was that I shared the same birthday and traditional name with her which she was openly sentimental about.

Na real wa!

Na me
Amebo!

76 comments:

  1. Oh fgs! Your former boss was just a bully, and she would have been that way no matter her gender. Sometimes, female bosses have to work twice as hard to gain half the respect. As time has passed, I've learned to be firmer with my staff because being sentimental doesn't pay. I'm your boss, not your mother. Anyone who isn't comfortable working for me cos I'm a woman is free to go.

    And while you're castigating females who have dared to succeed, maybe you should do research for a post on men who sexually harass every female staff (whether married or single, they don't care) because they're men?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. @anon you said it PERFECTLY! Madam had narcissistic behavior. And for female execs to be recognized in corporate entities they have to work twice harder than the men and develop think skin to handle staff else the same staff will ruin you.

      Delete
    2. Menh I have experienced a very wicked female boss. Their working hard and being firm doesn't have to translate to wickedness to their staff.

      Delete
    3. Anon 16:01 Depends on what y'all call wickedness. Some staff think that a female boss should be smiling with them or be a pushover to prove that she's nice. I laugh in my husband's native dialect; me wey e no dey hard me to sack person. Don't come and stress me. Just do your job and go home cos if we're all playing like mates and I can't pay salary, you will remember I'm your madam that hasn't paid. I'll treat you like a human being and be fair, but I'm NOT your friend so know there are boundaries. Wait oh, I don't understand all this slapping I'm reading about - adults in a professional environment just keep their faces to be receiving slap when it's not Nollywood film you're acting (like WTH?)

      Delete
    4. Fact is, there are things you can get away with with a man that staff know they can't try with a woman cos they she won't buy it. Male bosses are more susceptible to some rubbish that female bosses know are scams. I've walked into my husband's company, seen someone for the first time and told him "So-and-so needs to go". He used to think I'm being mean, till one thing happens and they discover the person I said should go has been embezzling company funds. Or something else. We've even seen the one that planted juju in the office premises. Or is it the one that arranged kidnap? Lol. That's why some staff fear their oga's wife; she can see through their BS. Even when a man isn't thinking with his dick, there are things men don't actually notice. I don't know if it's blindness or brain freeze.

      See Elizabeth Holmes and her so-called billion dollar Theranos patent/idea/company. Most of her investors, board members and many of those who hailed her as the female Steve Jobs were men. Many women (including academics and doctors) knew she was talking nonsense from content to packaging to delivery.

      Delete
    5. @17:44 I just googled Elizabeth Holmes. Thanks for the info

      Delete
  2. I am a female but God forbids I have a female as my boss. That aside I have led various groups nd I know how happy people are under me but that's me. God never give me a female boss.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I understand you but not all female bosses are mean. At my place of work, My GM is a man and he is so mean to everyone under him. Everyone dislike him including colleagues from his former department when he was a manager there. Funny thing is he is a redeem pastor and a big time womanizer. My manager is a woman. That woman is too nice and very hard working. Everyone enjoy working with her. I don't mind working till late night because of her with so much joy in my heart. Mrs **** may God continue to bless you for us oh. We are waiting patiently for the Gm to retire. We all hope she will be the one to take over from him. She deserve that promotion. At my former place of work, my boss was also a woman and she was very sweet too. I have been lucky with Female bosses.

      Delete
  3. I am a female but God forbids I have a female as my boss. That aside I have led various groups nd I know how happy people are under me but that's me. God never give me a female boss.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So why are you running away from your kind?

      Delete
    2. Are you sure you do not crave male bosses to fk?

      Delete
    3. It means you will one day have to resign if you keep this mindset. What happens if the coy decides to put you under a female. Anon just pray for the best be it Mae or female.
      I have worked with different line managers inclusive expats and outside Africa. One thing I have learnt is your Line manager will treat you the way you based on your self branding.

      Delete
  4. Please, the boss is just a nasty person. She just happened to be a woman. I have worked for women who were wonderful superiors. Till today, I consider them role models and mentors.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Some female bosses are mean, most especially when you look better than they are.
    One dealt with me when I was serving. She hated me for no reason 💁🏿‍♂️
    I reported her to the director, she hated me more 😂😂 but in the end, I won.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I used to have a female boss like the one described. If this woman starts shouting like this, the building will be vibrating. Any little thing can spark off her anger. Her former employees usually recount tales of how she slaps, kick & beat up some of them before she changed & started suspending them indefinitely. One lady in my team refused to come back after she was suspended.
    Na wa!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If you look into the homes of ladies who behave like your former boss their homes are not happy homes. I believe the situation of things in homes reflects/affects the attitude of individuals from those homes. This applies to both males and females.

      Delete
  7. Where I did my PPA some years back, my boss was a woman, chaii this woman will cari husband frustration come work con drop am for your head. As fine petite girl wey I b If any guy come find me wey she see us dey gist na DAT time she go remember say make I con cari her plate go wash or make I con go buy chewing gum for her. She b wan frustrate me also but I use love mellow her down.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You see you people? You were posted somewhere to do PPA but you had men coming to look for you (cos you're fine) but your boss is the bad one? Lol. Why are men coming to look for you in your PPA during office hours? Did you do your PPA in a brothel? Y'all will not do the right thing at the right time, but anyone who reacts to what you're doing is a bad person.

      Delete
  8. When a woman calls her fellow woman "hippopotamus", doesn't that define her as
    similar in character with the boss she was denigrating? What's the
    difference between "brainless" and "hippopotamus?"😯😯😯
    And then talking about "transfer of aggression", that is the bane of a
    lot of women that are not loved.

    The earth cannot bear under a woman that is void of love Proverbs 30:21-23

    You can see that even the earth she is standing upon is complaining.
    Proverbs 27:15
    A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike.

    If you as a lady hasn't experienced the love of God in the salvation of your soul, do not be surprised that
    you will behave unseemly. You will be
    angry with any and everything.
    You have to have love in your life to
    be able to give it unconditionally.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah,that word 'hippopotamus' was very wrong,however I think it was a mistake.
      Amebo,there are words that are not derogatory that will still carry the meaning intended. Beautiful read

      Delete
    2. Was fishbrain a mistake also? She’s as nasty as her boss just not in a position of power.

      Delete
    3. Omeh
      Why are you defending someone who told us that she is amebo?
      She is depraved and spins on her own fecal matter. Her mouth is
      worse than that boss' own.
      She is a senseless, manner-less woman

      Delete
    4. Someone that calls herself amebo and talks like the poster says she had a mean female boss and we're believing her? We've not seen the boss but we've seen the poster from her write-up.

      Delete
  9. I worked for one fool that calls herself a manager in one of the internet service companies..she made the place toxic and i worked for 18 months there..i resigned and got another job which the head is a guy..we play a lot in our department but we get the job done..Am female but I dont want a female bitch as a boss..I prefer men abeg.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And what kind of girl has her name as "b7tch", calls another woman "fool"
      and likes an office where "she will be playing with a guy who is her boss?"
      See how you just removed your pants in the market place?
      Now let me not ask you the kind of play you and your male boss play in the office

      Delete
    2. Loosen that bra sis,life is not that hard

      Delete
    3. @14:38
      You mean "loosen that bra" so that all of you will play with your bosses in the office?
      Why should life be hard when WOMEN OF EASY VIRTUES like you abound?

      Delete
    4. Lol @ play a lot. You think you got a job to play.

      Truth? Sometimes, God arranges a female boss for you out of His mercy cos of what is ahead in the future you can't see. Some of you are just lazy, entitled and can't hack real life so you want to flirt your way through everything. But na man you fit try that one with. Unless a female boss is a lesbian and is sexually harassing you, or using her position as a cover to recruit younger ladies into runs, she will not tolerate flirting.

      See one up there saying her boss was angry cos men came to look for her in her PPA. What I find amazing is that the brain of a university graduate isn't telling her that there's a time and place for everything. Those corpers they retain, do they have 10 heads? You won't add value where you are sent but you want to be treated like a prince(ss). And you think you're being victimised and that you're fine. You should have been working in the marketing department of a modelling agency, then. Of course your boss will choose that time to send you message since you don't have sense and the men looking for you too don't have sense. If the men were responsible and sensible, they would have been working somewhere in that time instead of looking for a corper whose head they can be waining during office hours. If you want to come to equity, better come with clean hands. You're fortunate it's not me you were working for. When I know it's not vagina and associated services we're selling, why will men be coming to look for you to the extent of gisting in the office without fear or shame? That means you are not busy, so I'll find work for you to do since you can't take initiative. I will send you to wash the air and look for an imaginary leaf from the ohembe tree at 12 junctions in the evil forest in my village to take to the chief priest of my husband's village shrine as you no dey busy - since we all want to be crazy.

      Delete
    5. I just love your comment, I can't stop laughing. Nice one

      Delete
  10. Amebo you are a liar with low self esteem. Women bosses this and that. Your insecurity won't allow you support your fellow woman making it. You will rather a man be your boss and we wonder why women are still being treated unfairly in this 21st century.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Please take it easy u know.You can state an opinion without being insultive. I am always for women too. But sometimes we can be so unbelievable. I had a female boss who was just Not what I expected. I had thought as a young woman it would even be great to be under a woman boss. Someone u can look up to. But she just did not like me . And I tried. She just had a way of making me not to feel Like I belonged at work. At the company. I dreaded going to work. There was a particular dinner(company) we went to after the events there I cried my eyes out.
      Then out of the blue she was sacked. God for some reason I felt so relieved. Her replacement is a man. Its been really great so far. There is such a huge differece and I cannnot stop thinking why was she not like this?!! Why did she have to be so so mean??!!
      I know there are good female bosses out there . They should please not stop but keep inspiring young women.

      Delete
    2. Shut up.Don't be stupid.Retard!!If you have never experienced office brutality by a female boss,keep shut and allow others talk.Women are treated unfairly by their fellow women in their quest to get to the peak of their career.Jealous about what exactly??Everything is jealousy for dumb skulls like you.Mtchewww

      Delete
    3. I don't know about the other gists but I have personally experienced where the madam of the house took off her shoes, creeping on her tip toes and barefoot into the compound with driver rolling the car silently behind her. I was amazed. I must have made a sound because the security man beside me said, "Na so madam dey do" as if to say it is a normal occurrence. I quickly delivered the letter I was to drop off and went home.
      Apart from that I've had some great female bosses that we still maintained contact even after I've left.

      Delete
    4. With due respect to the females, at least %51 are irrational.

      Delete

    5. Obviously you have not been under such a boss. It is hell. Don't blame the poster.

      Delete
  11. My boss is female and smart.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Any female boss that has a good marriage does not behave that way. it is the lots of
    angry women

    ReplyDelete
  13. Working with most female bosses can be completely draining. I've never had a good experience with them. I am still suffering under one.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Have you checked that you've done all you're supposed to do, how and when you're supposed to?

      Delete
  14. The woman own dey her body jare. My former boss was a single lady (presently engaged),super intelligent and attained a higher level at a very young age. She was never this nasty, and was an instrument to my career growth.

    Not all female bosses are "mad".

    ReplyDelete
  15. Enter your comment... women are just terrible creature.we men.i hail oooo.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Women bosses are mean.I remember service year.The overall department boss.That woman ehhh.I thank God for my immediate supervisors both women,till date when I go down on my knees I put them in prayers for God to promote and elevate them.They were real leaders and bosses.Correct and discipline you with one hand and pamper with the other.But the main madam,any day she doesn't come to work,that day would just be beautiful and splendid.She shouts at every Tom,dick and Harry.How dare you fall sick and take one day off??If you like be dying come to work.Greet her,she won't even acknowledge your presence,talkless of answering.I still greet anyway.In fact a lot of things I can't type.Too long and too much.Very Bipolar woman.Gives you a task and you must go by her instructions,don't open your mouth to suggest or speak if you think her approach won't work,when the task fails as per going by her instructions,she will still turn around to insult and humiliate you if it doesn't go well,And deny ever telling you that.The pressure she gives ehn,most of the older folks in the department have one sickness or the other and Hbp among them was like a normal thing.That whole service experience changed my mindset about a 9-5.I was recommended to be retained after my service and 2 week of rest.I didn't resume or go back to take appointment letter.God forbid I die in my young age.I started my own business and I treat my employees nicely because I know how it is to have a wicked boss,the depression,fear of coming to work the next day,When you are getting dressed,entering transport,almost near office,entering the building,na so much chest pain,heart racing,head spinning and imagining what could go wrong for you to be shouted at,insulted and humiliated by one human being.The worst is lack of enthusiasm for life as a whole.I make sure there's discipline among them and loud shouting,verbal abuse,belittling and hitting is a No.I try really hard to not take on my personal mood and emotions on them at all.Nobody knows what tomorrow holds.God help and elevate everyone not to be at the mercy of wicked bosses,both Male and Female.But it seems women are more wicked,as if they are trying to prove something.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My dear I know what you mean. It is physically and psychologically draining. I too eventually fell ill and knew I had to quit for my sanity and health. It just wasn't worth it.

      Delete
    2. Na me an my office o.... I go to work scared I may receive sack letter or commit offence. I am praying to God to give me sometime so I can save a little, I don run like the wind blows . I can't continue like this for the rest of my life. Tension is too much abeg.

      Delete
  17. Mine is publicly humble and privately arrogant and manipulative. Believe you owe her your life. She is so fearful, suspicious of staff without concrete evidence. She detests any form of progress and likely people looking beggarly (never look good as from third week until salary is paid). All personal social media activities are subtlety monitored with her actions betraying her. Vengeful and venomous 🐍 demanding loyalty by force. Plays 'god', lord and master. Which one I want to talk or leave?

    ReplyDelete
  18. I think it happens among both sexes, but its prevalent in women. Especially single older women, I really dont blame them, people react to things differently, I also suggest companies train their staff regularly on leadership skills to enable them coexist with their colleagues.

    The ones you should fear the most are those who are very quiet but will frustrate every effort you make, they'll go as far as speaking ill against you to their bosses.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Even married ones......

      Delete
    2. @14:47 yes, bad culture and lack of training is actually the reason.

      Delete
  19. I had a wicked female boss, in fact she is a witch, when you see her coming you must run. she had worked is some hotels in lagos, her former hotel is at Toyin street, ikeja. This woman is too wicked, sacked so many staff and pretends alot when she see the owner but to God be the Glory, the owner saked her too

    ReplyDelete
  20. Its not only female bosses oh, I had one male boss that is nothing short of a devil. I won the staff award of the year in my branch just before he was transfered and from the first month, he threatened that he would destroy my name at the head office. Four months later, he carried out his threat but his superiors weren't buying it. I cried my eyes out ehen, and to think I was pregnant, he increased my work load, no scheduled time for antenatal for me during that period, telling all that I should be transfered, my sin? he didn't just like me lol. How I survived the pregnancy period was just God's doing. I know God is a righteous judge. So it isn't only female bosses.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I have had very bad male bosses, but sorry to say the female trumped them.

      Delete
  21. My female Boss was cool

    During my first pregnancy with twins, she covered up for me, advised me to take a week's bedrest, gave me breaks to rest, begged me never to resign (high risk pregnancy) and even bought my babies gifts. God bless her wherever she is now

    ReplyDelete
  22. Lucky you. God bless your boss. You are good too.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Yes. My lady boss was very mean to me. My friends told me that it is love-hate relationship. They goaded me and I mustered courage one Friday evening towards end of work to approach her. She was really nice. I told her that I like her and will like her to be my friend. The last thing I remembered was small stars that stung like bees. The thunderous slap was out of this world. When I got home, I lied to my friends that it was a bus conductor that punched me in the eye. My eyes were red. So on Monday, I didn't go office. One of my colleagues called and said madam wanted to know why I missed work. Who? Me? I no do again. Six months later, I have never stepped foot in that office again. I finally relocated to Ilorin last week.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. eeyah sorry about that... ilorin will favor you, welcome to my town

      Delete
    2. Na wa for you oh, you get liver oh.. Anyways sorry for the slap..

      Delete
    3. This really cracked me up... lol

      Delete
    4. I can't just stop laughing.😁😂😃😃😃😃.

      Delete
    5. She shouldn't have slapped you but you see what we're talking about boundaries? You were employed to do a job, you left that to go and tell your boss you want to be friends with her. Shebi your colleagues you were gossipping your former boss with, dem no follow you chop slap and they're still working in that office six months later? You too, learn to recognise when you're being set up.

      Delete
    6. I dont understand how you work in offices where they slap you. You cant take legal action against her? Ah! I will make that place very hot for her she will regret hiring me

      Delete
    7. I am still laughing like banshee

      The most Complex

      Delete
  24. I really pray not to work with a difficult female boss, I can’t stand bully for too long, I will one day talk back, is now my own people will see and think am terrible.

    ReplyDelete
  25. women are not meant to hold any Top post?how can a woman be a man's boss?taboo.
    I hate such with passion.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dirty primitive archaic thinking. Geddifok outta here.
      People like you will keep your wife in a dog cage and force her to feed from the dustbin.
      And if you're a woman, you're more worthless than spit.

      Delete
    2. Anon 16:31, you are VERY stupid.
      Say thank you.

      Delete
    3. @anon 16:31, Smart people hate your primitive type with passion. Ozuor

      Delete
    4. You are yet to meet me. You wil hate yourself as a man.

      Delete
  26. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

    ReplyDelete
  27. Mine was out of hell,bitter,gossiping,woman who was agianst everybody rising,saw her the other day and she ran away like a rat that she really is...my head too strong for her small scheming...used her to get what i want and still laughing at her stupidity...bitter women are so easy to manipulate...just give them a little firewood and they will light up the place just to get at you not minding if you have a fire extinguisher at your back.

    ReplyDelete
  28. Local company that doesn't have culture. How can people be slapping themselves in the work environment? Na boarding house??

    ReplyDelete
  29. You see? Your female bosses taught you how to be a good boss

    ReplyDelete
  30. The fact tbat it is acceptable for so-called bosses to slap their workers and get away with it shows that we are a actually animals in this country

    ReplyDelete
  31. Any little thing, Nigerians will be shouting lawsuit lawsuit!! No be person wey don chop go find money give lawyer.

    ReplyDelete
  32. I had an evil male boss,he wont allow me go a lunch breaks. When its time for me to close he also wont allow close too..He wont give approvals but he will send documents my way that needs his approval. He make work difficult for me. I resigned among other reasons. I still work with a male boss,he is not out rightly evil but subtle.He does not want anyone to grow.He presents himself to top management as the only one that knows. He hides things and prefers working as a silo instead of a team.. There are two female bosses in my organization though i dont report to them. One makes her staff carry her handbag to and from her car,serve her food and tea and the likes. The other goes around asking the drivers,security etc about staffs and their personal lives.. Being good and treating people right has nothing to do with gender

    ReplyDelete

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