Do you know it is possible to chase away your intended spouse with demands?these demands range from finances to emotional to psychological to social ..
You prayed to have a good man and God sends him your way but you made a demand of wanting to go shopping and asked him for money and he ran...
Or its the other way?
You keep wanting her to make sacrifices that even your sisters would not do and she has had it and took to her heels.......
Do we have anyone in this whatsapp groups?
Tiny cucumbers chase me away.
ReplyDeleteThat one ant be redeemed.. Lol
DeleteCant*
Delete@Slutty Chikito
DeleteSo you meet a man today, you measure
im cucumber rod okwa ya? 😯😯
How, no be legs you go open asunder so?
Make you no runs away o, come answer ajuju..
Not at all @ don 😂
DeleteAjuju n ese okwu, my eyes are very good at measuring crotches 🤪🤪🏃🏿♀️🏃🏿♀️🏃🏿♀️🏃🏿♀️
Nothing will chase away the one mean for you.
DeleteAnon 15:22 Lol. Life will shock you. Jesus was anointed yet Joseph was instructed in a dream to a) take Mary as his wife and b) flee cos Herod wanted to kill the child. Joseph should have stayed put and said, "But this is an anointed child, nothing can happen to him."
DeleteIf you like behave anyhow, even if Heaven opens and you hear God, the marriage/relationship with end. That God gives you something is the more reason you should respect yourself and keep it well.
15:39 it is you life will shock. Las Las Joseph stayed. The one who will stay will stay, no matter the reason why. That is why today people who were not expected to marry are married and those expected to be are not. Nothing new under the sun dearie. So calm ya titties.
DeleteAnon 18:24 Lol! Maltreat people like a narcissistic fool, then have the nerve to complain that they left. Joseph stayed because he heeded instructions and obeyed God. He didn't behave carelessly and claim que sera sera. Who are those not expected to marry? I don't know any such person cos that doesn't even make sense. If you have such an issue, go see a psychiatrist or go for deliverance. Let them find out why you think you can behave anyhow but expect people to put up with you.
Delete18:24 just calm down. Why so hot and bothered? I never said you have to deliberately maltreat anyone. I am not your problem and we don't have to agree. I calmly stand by what I typed. So you can go see the shrink you obviously need.
DeleteI can date a guy for months without demanding.i take care of myslf very well, some i can go as far as feeding them..at d end all i get is heartbreak. What do men really want?
ReplyDeleteMay God help you. Your challenge is not you have not met your follow come.
DeleteChinwe Uba
Mother Theresa 😁 nothing do u.
DeleteWhat do you really want?
DeleteEbenebe mother Africa. Kezaya continue o.Smh. If my demands chase u, pls keep it moving, u r not mine.
DeleteConsider,consider e go knack u Okoso and once that happens, mission for them is completed.
Use demand to chase away fakes pls 🖤
This proves that there's no rule to it. You may ask for help and he will still be interested in you, while some may form miss independent and the guy will still dump them.
DeleteJust be you, whoever is made for you, will find you.
1000 likes @ Anonymous 15:46
DeleteCan't stop laughing here..
Apply some restraints. Being too eager to please in an undefined or not legalised relationship makes you appear desperate, to most men. They'd generally feel you need them more.
DeleteAny man you have to feed
DeleteHmmmm
Don't independent yourself out of relationship ooo
I prayed for a tall dark handsome man, I got it but we divorced because I did not add, responsible, loving, caring, selfless, down to earth,easy going to my list. When the storm came, it blew us apart
ReplyDeleteYou were answered according to the idol in your heart. Tall, dark and handsome doesn't mean husband material. Sometimes, we think God doesn't have sense or He'll give us something bad, so we go and choose what He didn't ordain.
DeleteI dated tall, dark and handsome twice (not at the same time). The first one, I sent myself - I can't even lie, Jesus knows. The second one was Saul (the one God uses to hold you in place when you're impatient but David isn't ready or you're not ready for David). They both looked the part but would have scattered my life. My 27th birthday, I got on my knees and told God I'm very sorry. That He should send me MY OWN HUSBAND. My husband arrived that same day. At first, I was confused cos I thought: 1) He's too quiet, 2) He doesn't look like what I thought he would look like. He isn't as tall (he's a tiny bit taller than me) or dark as the guys I dated before. But I wouldn't trade him for any other man; this is my person - the buddy and the booty. Yes, he's handsome.
Some of us no dey hear word till we see the result of going to chook head where our own wisdom put us.
Maybe you don't have all the characteristics you listed above.
DeleteYou can't be looking for a perfect man whike having a bad characteristic.
Congratulations @15;10. Not many were this lucky
DeleteAnonymous congrats to you...
DeleteEnjoy dear..
Praying right helps a lot in ones life..
Since i was born, asking someone for anything is the hardest thing for me, even my parents, that why when i was in school, my mum doesn't joke with my monthly allowance, cos even if it finishes i will rather starve than ask and funny enough, I'm over close to my parent. Have begged God to change me
ReplyDeleteThen dating i can say, i have never asked any man for money, and i have never been lucky to meet the one that will just know i have a weak point and give out knowing i will never ask. My ex says it gives and it shall be given. i pray i meet a man that will once in a while, give out some beautiful gifts and not be happy with the way i am. My sis had to get a job for me, cos she said if im married without a job, and a that takes advantage of the way i am, then I'm done for. My family usually pity me alot. i wish i can change
Learn to ask. If you don’t ask, how will you receive?
DeleteIt does not make you cheap.
Your family in understanding.
Imagine meeting a very selfish man, he’ll cling to you cos he knows you will never ask.
Don’t be like that, you should losen up.
Responsible men don’t wait for their women to ask before they do the needful.
I will out you in my prayers!
DeleteI don't know what to say to you.
DeleteIf it’s not in you, it is not just in you and I don’t there’s anything wrong with you. The only area I have a problem with is that you could not/cannot ask your parents. In my case, I rarely ask. If you don’t take initiative then it’s only a matter of fact before I walk. If I ever ever ask, I don’t like that person.
Delete*think there’s anything....
Delete*time not fact. 😓
Here for the comments
ReplyDeleteDH and I were content and that was what
ReplyDeletehelped us. "Godliness with contentment is great gain..."(google this quote).
He knew there was nothing he could give me as in to impress me.
What he did that really touched me was that immediately I said "yes" to marry him, he joined me to his accounts. 😢😯😯
Later he told me that he was warned never to try to impress me with gifts
as I already love him just as he was....
I did not join him to my accounts till after he paid bride price and
he did not complain... 😂
.. and that's where we began. There was no issue of "demands"...my needs did not change because I said yes to him. I remember that his birthday came first after our engagement, I took him to a huge mall and asked him
to choose whatever he liked...He walked around the mall and with a
teary eye, he held my hand and planted a kiss on it. "This I have chosen..." he whispered...
I as a matter of character/dignity, do not receive any gift from any man
before I say "yes to marry him" and I said that to only him...
But Sdk, MOST Naija girls dey this whats-whatever group you mentioned o.
Persin go ask a girl for a date, first, she go collect a football team of her friends chop a whole restaurant and carry take away,
return house.😯😯😯 Next day..."What's your plan for me..." (I read this line yesterday for chronicles o)...next day... "My mommy's rent has expired, my younger brother is unemployed...
my sister won't write her exams if she hasn't paid her school fees... my phone is old, it's iphone 8..."
Shuoooooooor, dude commit crime
to ask you for a date, abi im don become "great provider?"
😊😊
Na greed, pure greed kill my Naija girls o.
Yesterday, them all they chant "money, credit alert..." The BEP post still never clean off o
😯😯😯😯😯😯😯
Enter your reply...hahahahahahahaha...u are really mad bt u make sense today...d day ur dh go shock u..
Delete😂😂😂😂😂
DeleteA lengthy story!!
DeleteHahahahahahahahahahaha this woman ehn!
Delete@Fork Sisi
DeleteShock me?
So when my DH don become Nepa transformer eh forkunizer?
Ajuoo m gi ajuju? 😊😊
That one na wetin you dey wish me
as una don send plenty electric shock for my smooth nyansh... no show
Whosai,
but you no be God na...
You sabi how many imerime years we don dey jolly matrimony...
Persin wey no know persin dey call am "that man"...
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Ur DH will never shock u IJN
DeleteWonderful personality
Abeg
DeleteLet us not be expecting shock or bad news na
Ahaaaaaaaaa
ReplyDeleteE bi like say the Pharisees don start them chant o
"I can't ask a man for anything...It is a difficult thing for me..."
Na ghosts dey chant "money, credit alerts..." for all the BEP
since last week?
Ajuju n' ese okwu o. 😯😯😯
That of yesterday still dey there o
😂😂😂😂😂😂
I don't need to ask, on your own d jazz of giving will just hook u 😂😂😂
Delete@Blackey
DeleteGiving no get jazz o
And jazz no dey affect persin wey dey rooted in Christ...
See am as Baba God yarn am for scripture...
Isaiah 54:17 But in that coming day
no weapon turned against you will succeed.
You will silence every voice
raised up to accuse you.
These benefits are enjoyed by the servants of the Lord;
their vindication will come from me.
I, the Lord, have spoken!
You see am?
Scriptures full ground for inside bible wey show say
if you dey inside Christ Jesus, dey fast, pray and sabi
God's word... Jazz no fit do nwiii
😊😊😊😊😊😊
One occult suitor like that don try jazz on me before...
to "marry am or nobody go fit marry me"... im jam "rock of ages", till the
last time I hear about am im never marry... tori for another time...
Abegi yarn us the tori today.
DeleteChinwe Uba
A babe I liked (she liked me too) told me I’ll have to open a business for her when we get married. She also insisted a big wedding. I dumped her like a bad habit.
ReplyDeleteShe kept trying to continue the relationship but I wasn’t having it. She pretended to change but I learned a long time ago to not excuse people when they show you their real characters.
She still stalks me. She knew she blew it.
My current lady is way better...and younger :))
By the way, I don’t think it’s a bad idea to open a business for your spouse (Male or female) but I’m pretty sure it’s a bad idea to PROMISE them before hand.
Lots of you reading this don’t know your parents / bosses / friends have big plans for yall but they won’t tell yall. They know if they tell yall, yall might get lazy and fuck up. Also they know if they tell yall, and things change to the point where they can take meet those promises exactly, yall might not understand.
So, Kings, avoid those entitled ladies that can’t afford what they demand from you. KNOW YOUR WORTH AND PUT TAXES ON IT. Men don’t owe women anything. Keep developing yourself. There are lots of pretty, sexy, financially capable, well educated young women that will see you as an answered prayer.
yimu😒🙄
DeletePerfect comment.
DeleteWehdone, you hear? ITK... Lol, life is not always the way we calculate it to be.....
DeleteOgbeni keep it moving Oshofree. She is not ur wife, her husband won’t b reminded , he will bless her over and over build house join sef. Tongolo men hissss🖤
DeleteEe pain you well well...Tufiakwa
DeleteLet us not justify gold digging, stinginess or also being wasteful or entitled
DeleteIt is a foolish man that I'd insensitive that will not know that a good woman should be appreciated and treated well
I joined half way listening to a radio programme and they were discussing an issue a guy sent in. That he took a girl out to either dinner or supermarket and told he he had a budget of ten thousand naira only for whatever she needs there and she insulted him, told him he is not a serious guy with no money and looking for a date, then she walked out on him. People that called in to the show said the guy should be happy her true color was shown on time, some were like maybe the guy even have but trying to know her type. I wished I had started the show with them to hear details of the story, it was really interesting
ReplyDeleteThey are not meant for each other...
DeleteShe really showed her true colour..
He tried to prevent wastage
DeleteShe didn't want control of it
Can 2 walk together except they agree?
I have never been the demanding type. My husband said he loved me because I hardly demanded for anything...
ReplyDeleteWhat a suspicious love!
Deleteside eyes*🙄😒
@pinklady hahahahahhaha
DeleteYou’re helping him save the money meanwhile he go de do free guy for babe outside.
Deleteu are right sdk.few ladies I met during the last snm told me my salary is too small to get married.150k plus 18 seater bus that delivers 50k per week.
ReplyDeleteI just dey observed just that man is getting old.33 by aug.😤
Don’t mind those babes.
Delete150k is not bad.
I am sure some of them don’t even have jobs.
People who earn 30 40k get married. You have no business entertaining those girls and I hope you are not the type to mistreat a good girl.
DeleteYou met the greed types...
DeleteYour salary and the extra coming from the bus business is not bad...
The one that will Love You like that will come..
Guy genuinely pray that GOD should open your eyes to see your wife
DeleteThen when she shows have no idol in your heart
Ask for confirmation
You too why you telling them your salary??!! When she asks about your salary when you are yet to propose marriage, then know that she is not serious. Tell her 30k!!!
DeleteWhen I meet a guy I want to be serious with I'd rather ask about his investments. To know what he uses his money for will let you in on his direction and focus in life. NOT salary. You earn 150k but you have supplemented your income stream. There are guys who earn 500k and cant make it to the end of the month cos of frivolities.
My babe met a guy who was earning about 100k but had managed to get himself some plots of land in lagos. I told her to marry him sharperly!! Thankfully before the wedding, he got an even better job.
Some of us women dont just have sense.
I believe a lady should not ask her intended for anything, but she should watch keenly how he reads her and what he gives her even without her asking. I think that will help in giving yourself self respect, making a decision without thinking of what you stand to loose materially and being more objective in assessing the man. For those who want to be team mermaid, it is even easier to reject sex when you don’t ask him for money or need him to pay your bills.
ReplyDeleteMy view about dating/courtship, I won’t ask you for anything, so don’t ask me for anything! No sense of entitlement from either party, the lady doesn’t expect husband duties from the guy and the guy doesn’t expect wife duties from the girl (cooking, washing, smothering, sex, etc). Just a ‘know your counterpart’ period, no pressure on any side.
Same ideologies I had before I started reading stories here and one advice that has always stuck in my head from Eze Nwanyi is always ask a man for money, never say no when asked else you'll end of taking more responsibilities when married or he'll spend on others, Men love to spend, its like an ego thing for them. Sad though I've not been able to ask or even take and at the end of the way I keep on loosing out. God help me to change!!!
DeleteStingy men will drool over this topic
Delete@ anon Chielo, I get where you are coming from. If he gives, don’t reject. In fact for me, if you never offer, I can even break up with you, but I will never ask.
DeleteIn the past 10 years numerous suitor and wanabee husbands has been chased away by me, or blocked and erased by me.
ReplyDeleteSome ran on their own too...
I don't know why for some reasons, loosers, jobless, married men, gigolos and toy boys all seem to draw near me, make propositions and target me? even when I lash out and curse them to their faces.
For where???
Many men, even oyibo men (usually well meaning white men will not even dare go near or look for a black woman that they don't measure up to or even at least way...above and better than her) too see me as someone for sugar mummy material, or kind of woman who will tolerate or to accommodate a lower status man in my life. In my case right now I don't know why? any man who is not better off than me to start with, will dare flirt or show that kind of interest openly to me?
I present a clean and well kept look, they see me as the career minded and focused older woman who is very attractive, drop dead gorgeous and fun to be around. But also unknown to many people, that I hate lazy people, or losers, broke ass, slow and weak minded. And also as I got older it got worse, the intense hatred I have for any one coming near to take advantage, parasite or leech off me. It is unbearable irritable to me now that I just can't stand anyone around me who is NOT ABLE TO PULL THEIR OWN WEIGHT AT LEAST!
Even the slightest sign of lazy behavior (not doing home work, playing when he's shouldn't, not following instructions or just messing around...sorry..oh as a little kid that he is now) from even my 7 years old dearest & sweetest grandson when I am around will trigger my reactions. As you can imagine the fear in his eyes whenever I react and start telling him the kind of man I want him to grow up to be and how to be! Sad.
Lol!!!
My tolerance level for lazy people and irresponsibility, retards and any reckless behavior and the hate I have for crackheads is the main reason why I have I chase many people away now and some do run away from me.
This one tight..😀😀😂 don't come for my jugular o
DeleteLet’s put it this way, the men cannot continually think that because a lady is of age to get married therefore they should just accept a lazy lay around. Most single guys are scared of ladies that are focused and accomplished. Even in my university days, my male colleagues assumed I was in a serious relationship, because I was just bent on graduating with good grades and getting a job after graduation. In as much as I was socially inclined (best dressed student in final year) they also tagged me most sophisticated. When I asked, they said it’s because I was too principled and aloof to advances from guys. Maybe I was, but it’s a burden on me to make small talks. If a guy/ lady is in synch with your line of thoughts then he/ she can’t be driven away. It’s only when the frequencies are not aligning that they will have to find their wavelength. Most ladies may not even demand for stuff but a guy will come and be demanding for sex, that’s a big put off. Sex should be given in the confines of marriage but when the guys ask for sex then the ladies ask for money in return. Don’t demand for wifely, duties let the lady too not demand for husbandly duties ( don’t get me wrong I’m totally not in support of ladies demanding for money but it takes two to tango). If it’s a husband/ wife you want focus on that goal rather than asking your girlfriend to wash, cook and all what’s not or asking your boyfriend for monies for whatever. If he had not come along those challenges would have been solved. I think demanding or not demanding of money is just a case of “cunning man die, cunning man bury am” .
DeleteNo time to indulge bullshit
DeleteI think you need to free yourself a bit. Maybe the Law of attraction thing is disturbing you somehow and you don't know it. If you focus too much on something, even if it is negative eg you don't like scumbags, you attract it to your life. Instead think nice thoughts about the man you will like to have and the people you want around you to attract them to you. Also try to be nicer to people generally and remember that no one is perfect, we are all trying to get there. However there is nothing wrong in ignoring fake people when you identify them so that they don't pull you down.
DeleteAnon18:19 - you 2faced Hypocrite! After marriage now and they start sending Chronicles, your kind will be the first to start singing the “didn't you see all those traits in him while you guys were dating"? song.
DeleteMine was the opposite. Hubby nearly left cos I wasn't asking and to him, that meant I didn't like him or I was taking from someone else.
ReplyDeleteSame reason my ex left, that I'm too proud, not knowing it just who i am, really want to change cos it not funny
DeletePray for GOD to give you balance
DeleteFunny enough I ask guys for money to chase them away cos the typical Naija guy will hesitate or even run. But you see the guys I love(d), i hardly ask for anything. I can't even bring myself to ask cos my self-pride won't let me. I was trained that way.
ReplyDeleteThis my tactics worked for all except one guy...my fiancé. I remember when I met him newly, I was like this short guy, as at how?(I love tall guys, his average of 5'7 seemed short to me coupled with the fact that I'm 5'7 too). After all his love professing cos he went straight to the point that he needed a wifey and not a GF, I didn't even take him serious. One day after plotting my exit, I told him out rightly that I needed money and within 5mins I got a credit alert o shoo. I was in the NYSC orientation camp then and he was always trying to initiate a video call which I wasn't cool with. I just told him my phone camera was bad hence no video calling. 2days after camp he Got me a new tear rubber samsung phone. Haa...this guy doesn't wanna give up o even bought my weave. But the single thing that touched me and made me more open to him was the fact that this guy travelled all the way from our state to Enugu just to pick me from camp o,he even had to pass the previous night in a hotel just waiting.....I was gobsmacked, what selfless act. Anyways,it's being a year and 6months and I thank God I didn't succeed in chasing him away o with useless demands that wasn't even necessary.
Interesting
DeleteChinwe Uba
The one that will stay will stay
DeleteI hope he doesn't become stingy after marriage.
DeleteIts over a year now, and babe only demanded cash from me once but I do give to her periodically
ReplyDeleteThis thing is funny cos Men (and Women) are weird. I've actually had guys breakup with me because "she's to hard, stubborn, miss independent, bosslady, not submissive" because I couldn't bring myself to ask for anything. Like someone above said, if I notice you are the type that doesn't give or take me out, spend, I will excuse myself. My late mum will say, you see your father, he's not perfect o but he has a kind heart!! I pray you meet someone as kind as he is. My father didn't allow my mum spend her salary for the house even gave her allowance on top!
ReplyDeleteLadies who ask their Men for hair, cloth, school fees, parents upkeep, this that, even lie they have Bill's to pay meanwhile na just to chop clean mouth irritate me!! Eww!!
likewise Men who don't like to give and are tight fisted are eww as well.
What I know is last last what is yours is yours. if you are the type of person that likes to ask, you will jam your father Christmas! if you are like me that won't ask, you will jam the person that will give you money without asking.