Iya Ibeji Series - When Your Teen Crushes On Someone

Is there a difference between toasting and crushing on someone?

My friend sent her daughter over to my place for me to talk to her, since according to her I was the patient one.

When she came to my house I saw cane marks on her body, her mum had beaten her terribly. I was upset, then she explained what happened.

She had a crush on a boy in her class, they are in JSS3. Her friends knew about it and they told the boy. The boy wasn't interested and told her and she was angry with her friends for telling him. It was the conversation with her friends that her mom saw that resulted to the beating.


I called the mum immediately to express my displeasure, but she had a different mindset about the whole thing, she felt her daughter was asking the boy out.
I had to explain to her the meaning of crush and I told her I was disappointed in her o, later she will be forming butter, ordinary crush she doesn't know.


But my friend was still angry and refused to see the difference between toasting and crushing.


FRIEND: Like it wasn't bad enough that a child of her age wants to have a relationship but she is the one doing the toasting. Na that one pain me pass. That girl doesn't take after me at all.


IYA BEJI: I don't think she is too young, I remember I was crushing on a guy when I was in JSS3


FRIEND: Pleas don't tell her that o.It will give her mind.


IYA BEJI: I already did and that made her open up to me, I asked her if she has ever kissed a guy
(At this point I could hear my friends heatbeat from the phone so I hesitated a bit to torture her small)
No she hasn't, but I was able to talk to her. She told me things like she was talking to her friend and then she said aunty please don't tell my mummy. So I won't be able to tell you everything we discussed.


FRIEND: Iya beji please tell me now let me know what she is up to, children of these days wise pass us.


IYA BEJI: It broke my heart when she said that, I can't imagine my daughter telling someone else to keep such things from me. You should be happy the boy didn't like her back, what if he had told her to send her naked picture and then circulate it round the school. Do you know what would have happened, you daughter would have been too ashamed to go to school and the spirit of sniper would have come calling.


FRIEND: Training up a girl child isn't easy, please help me advice her I don't have your kind of patience, my body dey hot because I no do this type of things until I got to the university.


The conversation was lengthy but let me stop the here. Please parents with female children, try and be your daughter's best friend. You should have seen the way my friend's daughter eyes brigthen when I told her about my crush, it was like finally somebody that understands me.


I have an adopted daughter that is grown and she has told me things that made me wanted to slap her. But I held myself back by saying thank God she told me, what if she has kept this away from me? Then I become calm and I'm able to advise her properly.


Mothers be your daughter's best friend because there are lots of wolves in friend's clothing just waiting to snatch them.