"I was invited for the first time by my supposed mother in-law . So I decided to go visit her today because I don't work on Saturdays. When I got there, I was really comfortable because the house is well furnished and everyone in the house was nice to me. Then few minutes later after they finished cooking, which I also helped out in the cooking. She sent their house help to serve me this. The portion of EBA is not even the problem because I don't eat much but I have never eaten a meal without meat or fish inside before. When I saw the food, I felt really bad because I was the one who washed the goat meat she used in preparing it. I felt really bad and embarrassed. I snap it so I would show my fiance but I left the food untouched and went home. I have been trying to reach my guy to explain what happened but he has refused to pick my call. Please house did I do wrong? And please what should I do"?
*Has anyone ever been tested by their would be inlaws before?how did it end up?you failed or you passed?
This young man is not ready to Marry......Why would anyone serve you like a slave because they are testing you?Testing what?Hisssssss.
If this was a test,i would also fail it...Am i your house girl?I would even ask the question before i leave...Marriages like this dont last because of this kind of mentality!
'Am i your house girl?' so it's okay for househelps to eat like this. After all they are househelps ba?
ReplyDeleteDon’t mind Stella. As if helps aren’t human beings as well. I won’t even serve dogs without meat.
DeleteEheya you could have just told them to put the food as takeaway on your way throw the food way..
DeleteThey never said it was a test, the girl believed that all by herself, let’s not even say it’s her in laws place, let’s say it was her female friends house, and the mother gave her this food, would she challenge her friends mother or bring it online or call it a test, immediately she say the food should have pretended to eat it. It may not have even crossed the woman’s mind to give her meat. But to snap it and bring it online or send it to her boyfriend, then she’s actually a mad girl.
DeleteShe could have politely said “mummy I am not hungry” but to bring it online or snap it, it shows her kind of heart. What is meat that will not eat a meal because it’s lacking
Poster you seem to be a proud person. And quite stupid too. What was your aim in showing the pic to your man? For him to help you insult his mum? Anyway now you're single go and buy a goat and eat it all till you're content.
DeleteI don't know people don't like voicing out things o. I would have simply told her ''mummy, they forgot to serve me meat o, can I go and dish myself ?''.
DeleteThen if she says NO, let me know im not welcome in their family. No point snapping and sending to my fiancé. Its somehow
Are we sure its not an over-sight on the maids part ?
DeleteOne thing we fail to realise as Africans is that respect begets respect. We just assume it's okay for it to be one sided, because elder. This is Africa, nay, Nigeria, we all know what it means when somebody gives you food without meat on your first visit, you aren't welcome, you aren't respected, you have no value to them. She did nothing wrong, she was disrespected and chose not to accept it. She did nothing to deserve being served like a dog, so why was she served like she were a dog, an why would anyone expect her to accept insult just because husband. Some are saying she was tested, please what manner of useless, disrespectful testing is this? All the tests they've been testing since what has it resulted in? Would the mother eat this if she was given this by her DIL? Would the son accept it if his fiance's mother served him like this? If I introduce a woman to my mum as a potential bride and my mum did this, she would owe me an explanation, and I would explain and apologise to the lady. Only one party was wronged here, and it wasn't the mother or her son. PS: It's not about the meat, it's about the significance.
thank you push up. some of you singles need wisdom, you are not wise. when you find a good man throw him away because his mother didn't give you meat.
DeleteI don't particularly like my mother in-law, I tolerate her. But my husband is the most sweetest man. I am sure she doesn't like me too because I aint Igbo and I married her son. we both do eye-service for ourselves, I only see her once a year during xmas and I have learnt to tolerate her. This not giving of meat is small in what the woman does to me. She purposely singles me out and leaves me out of all the wives in the house, complains about my cooking, say I cook Yoruba stew. she doesn't know all this even makes my hubby love me more. I just look at it as, I bear her for 7days out of 365 days in the year. And I get my loving husband for the 358 days.
Well said
Delete@ 15.54, easier said than done.You think you are filled with wisdom cuz you barely see her, of course, 7 days in a whole year ?? Whst if she was living with you? What will you do?
DeleteLeave her loll, 17:33 it's very easy to form Adviser General when you are not in the same shoes.
Delete@bed n Roses....Nothing like oversight here oo especially in Naija we live in, meat and soup goes hand in hand ni nothing like they forgot to give her meat.
DeleteTesting my ass!
ReplyDeleteDo I look like a goat to you?
Oh! The supposed would-be-mil was tryna know if she her supposed would-be-dil would finish her son's meat in pot or his money.
Rabbish!
This is nonsense as far as i am concerned this marriage is Dead before arrival it only shows that the mil will be a detector in their home for the suppose fiance not to pick your call then the mum must warned him not to pick your call evidence of a baby husband mtcheewww
DeleteThis is nonsense as far as i am concerned this marriage is Dead before arrival it only shows that the mil will be a detector in their home for the suppose fiance not to pick your call then the mum must warned him not to pick your call evidence of a baby husband mtcheewww
DeleteHaba!!! Cynthia Asanwa, learn to punctuate nau!!!
DeleteHaba!!!!!!!!!
Anon 14:31, no she can't ooh. That's how her mouth runs without break.
DeleteLol u don vex?
Deletevery bad mentality. the only person that can test you is your spouse who would live with you. me sef no go eat the food wey no get meat. my own family will even prepare special fod for you. let him and his family go and sit down.
ReplyDeleteMaybe cos the help served her, it could be the help doesn't take meat or fish when eating so served her same way she has been dishing her food.
Deletei was raised that way too, I don't take meat or fish from an elder's pot unless when asked to even if I made the food.
But it would have been nice if the woman dished her food or asked the lady to dish out herself since she assisted in making the soup. Maybe the woman didn't know about it, since na help give her the food.
First of all what are they "testing" her for? Damn marriages these days eee. That mother in-law, was that how they tested her? Will she like another woman to test her daughter? All these rubbish because of marriage?
DeleteWhat nonsense.. let that poster be warned ooo. The thing she will face marrying into that family is already bigger than her.
Exactly @ baby oku, testing her for what exactly? useless mother in law should marry her son.
DeleteIf my son's girlfriend visits me for the first time, there is no way she is entering the kitchen to raise a finger, she is a guest and should be treated as such.
When she becomes a regular visitor, then she can go to the kitchen to do little things like fry eggs , boil rice etc.Stupid people everywhere!!!
Me I will eat it ooo. But will complain to my hubby later. We have eaten food without meat or fish in my house before, so what is the big deal.
ReplyDeleteGod forbid bad thing,i will nver eat it,even if u put meat i may nt eat,let alone dis.
DeleteNo fish or meat in your house at that time Issa different thing from when you saw and even washed the fish/meat with your own hands.
DeleteAfricans!!!!! Measuring your standards by meat lol
DeleteYou must be from a poor home
Delete@Shooter shut up your gutter. If she is from poor home and so what? Fish and meat mentality.
DeleteShooter just shut da fuck up. She's from a poor home bcos she sees things from a different angle. You think everyone will be stupid and rude like you? Ive seen you that came from rich home but you're ready to commit murder bcos of meat and finish. Brainless fool.
DeleteShooter, that's not nice at all. Such a shallow comment.
DeleteNonsense test.
ReplyDeleteI can eat without meat but how on earth will someone serve a guest without meat?
That food up there doesn't look presentable.
Exactly.That is the crux of the matter.I don't eat meat but whoever serves a GUEST like this has no self-respect and dignity.
DeleteWould it matter if the poster was say English or German? Nigerian women are so troublesome. Always looking for something that offends them. Low self esteem having females. I really pride myself as a woman to avoid confrontation and unnecessary squabbles.
DeletePoster you are VERY WRONG. What is meat again if I may ask? You suppose to eat the food with all smiles , joy and happiness showing all over you. Refusing to eat the food shows that you can not overlook things no matter how small it is. And for the marriage forget it , it is over. @Giveaway Princess
ReplyDeleteSo she should pretend abi, when they start maltreating her later in the marriage and she brings her chronicles here, you people will tell her she saw the signs and jumped into the marriage?
DeleteShe did the right thing Biko, anything I can't tolerate in marriage, I can't tolerate it while dating
Spot on princess tever.
DeleteStella it wasn't about meat or fish, the real test was to know her capacity to endure or overlook.
God bless you. Some people can't even ignore. Can she swore that she has never eaten food without meat before. This test might even be from your husband.
DeleteSo if you were to visit a friend and was giving such a meal you will eat it with smiles, joy and happiness showing all over you. Wehdone ma
DeleteOriegwu really!!! Well, Lemme just take this as one of ya usual jokes.
DeleteFor once I agree with you. Eat then complain later. We don't even know if the fault is from the MIL or the maid.
DeleteYou think any man would be happy at such level of disrespect for his mother?????
Exactly!!!!! @unknown
DeleteWhy even complain?!! Just eat the damn food.
Delete@Amanda Favour, reading your comment I can tell you now that your bf or hubby has/will get a side chic because you are just too sour.
Eat and complain later ba? God forbid. That's how you people take shit in the name of marriage. Don't start what you can't finish. If you call it test, how will the guy be tested?? Rubbish mentality
DeleteO. K @ anon 14:06
DeleteMajority of the women talking yayanpu here forgot that they will be mother in-laws tomorrow.
DeleteLet me try not to insult you guys. So if she had eaten the food that means she can over look and ignore little things? No wonder they slap and strangle you people, cheat on top and you will still say thank you.
DeleteSomeone that should be treated as a princess is made to work and then not that there is no meat but everybody was devouring meat while she was served like a scavenger, ori gbogbo yin ti daru, low self esteemed people everywhere.
How many prospective son-in-laws go to their father-in-law to be's house and are treated shabbily and sent on silly errands as test.
Yeye women thinking a man is doing them a favour by marrying them.
Let me try not to insult you guys. So if she had eaten the food that means she can over look and ignore little things? No wonder they slap and strangle you people, cheat on top and you will still say thank you.
DeleteSomeone that should be treated as a princess is made to work and then not that there is no meat but everybody was devouring meat while she was served like a scavenger, ori gbogbo yin ti daru, low self esteemed people everywhere.
How many prospective son-in-laws go to their father-in-law to be's house and are treated shabbily and sent on silly errands as test.
Yeye women thinking a man is doing them a favour by marrying them.
16:28 don't waste your breathe.
DeleteThese ones?
Very primitive, pathetic lot.
They will spit on their heads and they will still be grovelling in fear.
Basic common sense, would you welcome a visitor with this kind of food. So all of you will be chewing meat and bones and leave your guests to be swallowing the hot eba with that miserable looking excuse of three teaspoons of soup?
This is how they 'test' you in your own homes? Can't you see that some of you are very sick.
Anon 16:30, Ah, God bless. I don’t have energy to type and you did it. 13 years married to the best man ever whom I love with all my heart but who also knows that I do not accept of tolerate disrespect. What stupid text? For what? Why do women think men are the prize?
DeleteHmm, the moment we understand that we are the prize then our esteem for our selves will skyrocket and we won’t take sthese kind of silly games...
Maybe the maid ate the meat before serving her, lol.
ReplyDeleteAnother angle 🤔🤔🤔🤔 LMAO 😀😁
DeleteAbsolutely correct.
DeleteMay be the maid served her the way she eats.
DeleteWhy isn’t she at the table eating with the rest of the family? A guest that went to someone’s house for the first time?
DeleteSmh!!
I’m so proud of this girl like she was my sister... these boy better grow up and our mothers better stop these silly games they play with peoples children cos Na e born boy
Mschetwww
I won't fail this. Atleast, take a morsel or two. You mustn't finish all the food. Except she's upset with the presentation.
ReplyDeleteAll these guys sef.
ReplyDeleteWhat rubbish!
ReplyDeleteYou were even nice enough not to have thrown the food in her face. All these wicked mother in laws shouldn't even be allowed to live
Ehen !!!🙆🙆🙆🙆
DeleteShooter just shut the fuck up. Imagine nonsense talk. So if you were the poster you will throw the food at your would be in-law face? This shows you lack good home training and proper upbringing. No wonder you're booless even with all your bleaching and 20k foundation plastered all over your face like plaster of Paris.
DeleteStop giving useless advice here bcos I know you in real life and I knew the type of shit you're consuming from that your aristo.
Liar would you have done that? Like my neighbor that always tell me to slap my sister inlaw but pets her own. Things tou people will tolerate 1001x be claiming voltron.
DeleteOh please!
DeleteShooter gyal "throw it in her face kill you there" instead of walking away you prefer to throw it on an elderly woman's face who is old enough to be your mama. This shows you still have a long way to go in life . Daft stupid fool.
DeleteThrow food in her face!!! Someone’s mother, so if your mother doesn’t give you what you expect you will throw it in her face? All these slay queens looking for boys to marry so they can deal with their mothers, weldone o, it’s not a must, she would have declined politely “ah mummy I am not hungry” if your boss offers you a mean will you not decline politely, would you start snapping it and putting online, it just shows how childish this lady is and she’s not ready for marriage. The mother inlaw has her fault yes but its not a must, what if they saw you snapping it?
DeleteShooter, just shut the hell up. Don’t say what you cannot do. Throw the food in her face indeed. Bloody idiot.
DeleteUseless anon, you can never mingle with someone like me cos you're way beneath me you moron! Which yeye aristo keep on fooling yourself, pig!
DeleteHonestly I feel hurt frnd girl.and the girl was d one who washed meat.she did the right thing
DeleteTaa gbafuo there Shooter abi scooter...onye ka ibu? Reveal yourself now? Hide behind your kpalasa to claim levels...evaporate enyi. Made people don't make noise.
Deletehahahahahaha lack of experience is worrying so many ladies on this blog or ya'll watch too many American movies. So if its your mother that didn't serve you meat you will throw food in her face ???
Deletewhat happened to voicing your complaint when you receive the food. Or rejecting the food outrightly and making up your mind you cant marry into the family.
Is violence or aggressiveness necessary.
I remember one time I was sick oh, so sick and my mother in law knew,I would go into fits when coughing, throw up, pee on myself sometimes self, I lost weight ,it was my first winter so I was struggling.
DeleteWe went to visit my mil in one of her daughter's home and she saw how sick I was yet still came to tell me' I should stand up from my seat and go and do something, you don't relax like this in an in-laws place'.
Wow,I was shocked, you that if your daughter has menstrual pain you treat her like egg?? dare say this to me when you can clearly see that I am sick?? Shouldn't a good mil tell you to go and rest?
That day defined my relationship with that woman. After statement I just sat on that chair and locked up, even the food they offered I rejected.
I thought this was a stone age practice, do they still do this ? If anyone test me I will happily fail. In fact that guy is immature and the mum is something else.
ReplyDeleteNop, You did no wrong cos I wee do d same if it were to be me.
ReplyDeleteFuck and to hell with him since he has refused to pick your calls.
What kinda nonsense testing should this one be called.🙄😏
Na wah oh, when they should be welcoming you with lots of meat. Tufiakwa for this kind of test .Meat that you helped in cooking, not like there was no meat
ReplyDeleteHmmmmmm, I'm amazed at the comments I'm reading, single ladies, keep pretending oh and be taking trash from in-laws just to be "accepted " oh, when they eventually marry you and starts disrespecting you, don't bother us with your chronicles. Dating stage your in-laws should be carrying you like an egg, make una continue oh!!!
DeleteGbammest Amanda! After marriage now, they will be fighting for respect forgetting how they belittled themselves to bear Mrs
DeleteStupid people with poverty mentality. My MIL won’t even allow me enter kitchen when I visit not to talk of any nonsense test. Crazy folks everywhere. My dear just jump and pass. If you passed this test maybe the next one they would set for you with be the “Eba with no soup test” to see if you are well equipped to survive and stick with their son in hardship.
ReplyDeleteShut up there sherikoko. That's how you people will be screaming on SDK blog. I can't take this, I can't take that but in real life you feed your in laws feaces just to be in their good book. Take any advice on this blog at your own risk. Most of them here are frustrated bipolar bitches.
Delete@anon13.54 it’s not my fault you are frustrated o.
DeleteYou see before I got married na men Dey rush me not just for dating sake but for marriage u know fine girls like us😆. So it’s not my fault that my self esteem is very high and I was very picky too.
You see The first day I met my in laws they welcomed me very well. I went back with lots of gifts 🎁 from my then prospective MIL even gifts for my mum too even though they were yet to meet each other. You see that was the type family I wanted to be in and I was glad I didn’t settle for less. 3years down and she’s still amazing and cares for me like my own mother.
So if you are So desperate enough to eat faeces just to answer ‘Mrs somebody” good luck with that you hear.
I would have failed that Test too. Meat is my reward for eating. In fact keep the food and give me the meat.
ReplyDeleteIt is a sign of things to come if you continue in that relationship. The man probably doesn't want to marry you and planned this with his mother.
This is plain wickedness as far as I am concerned
which kind yeye test be this one?
ReplyDeleteThunder fire testing. Will the guy also agree to handwash his FIL's clothes? Abeg abeg..enough with the poverty mentality & suffering 'n' smiling attitude.!
ReplyDeleteMehn. This is slavery.
ReplyDeleteI will eat like 3 rolls of eba and smile with them. But i will complain to my bae afterwards.
His family approval is more important than meat
Exactly!
DeleteThis is wisdom...
DeleteThe beginning of your oppression in the marriage
DeleteObviously the approval is more important for desperate women like you.Even if it is a monkey I am sure you are willing to do anything.
DeleteThat's how disrespect will start in marriage and then you start complaining meanwhile the signs were dere but cause of approval you turned a blind eye
DeleteLow self esteem!
DeleteIf I were the poster I will gladly eat the food and tell her thank you ma for the delicious meal. I'm very sure she will be very ashamed of herself later on. I will even jokingly tell her mama as if you know I'm tired of beef for now. The ones in my fridge I gave them out. I think as we advance in age we're supposed to reduce our consumption of meat bcos it's not healthy for our body anymore. So mama thanks once again for the sweet vegetable soup, may God bless you greatly.
ReplyDeleteI know how to deal with mother in-law like this. I will turn the table against her and finish her with reverse psychology.
Abi...make her feel bad and angry sef😂😂😂
DeleteMe ehn I would have simply brought her attention to the fact I wasn't served meat and offer to go and get it. Let me now wait for her to say NO.
DeleteSimple and short, after all food isn’t your problem
Delete@Anon14:00,yes ooh..I will make her feel terrible. That's how to disarm people like that. I will make sure she carry her gbege on her head while I 😁😁😁😁😁 her to scorn.
Delete@Bed and Roses, what if she gives you ela ojukan?(public ridicule) by rebuking you from going close to her pot of delicious goat meat vegetable soup? What will you do? That type of mama in-law didn't come to play. She came prepared.😠😠😠😠
@Mee,exactly. I will make her understand I'm not an ojuoriolari. In fact, even if I'm pako roro by the time I'm done with her she will think I was born,bread and buttered in wealth. Kukikikukiku.no time to snap any Yeye pics or call fiancée ooh.who DAT one EPP?
I would have eaten it no big deal, but for someone to serve u food like this says a lot about the person , ur supposed inlaws are bad people ! Just ignore them.
ReplyDeleteThis issue is a bit complicated, the Mil was wrong for presenting such obvious test, but the girl lacks home training for walking out, the easiest thing you should have done is take a little from the food or send the food back and tell them you are not hungry. but you had to bring out your phone and snap the food without knowing if they were lurking around , with the intentions of separating mother and son. This is how you pple scatter a home you are married into just because you can't over look little things. marriage is not for everybody , just enjoy your singlehood.
ReplyDeleteWhat's there to scatter like the son didn't see it
DeleteYou should have ask her the motive of serving guest without meat. It's possible your supposed mother na airforce.
ReplyDeletewit ds kyn pix u n ur MIL no saby cook oh
ReplyDeleteWhich kind nonsense test is that
ReplyDeleteIf the food wasn't cooked with meat or the meat had finished before I came I would perfectly understand and eat the food
But to cook food in my presence and then intentionally remove the meat is an insult
The kinda mother in law would make the marriage hell for the daughter in law
Not every action requires a reaction
ReplyDeleteIf your mum serves you without meat or fish will you announce it to the whole world on social media?
If you are a jovial person you should have joking called the made and be like, madam ugo wetin i do you naaaa ehhhh so you decided to sieze my meat smiling while saying it then hear her out or watch your mother inlaw reaction but if you are on the reserve side, swallow few balls and wash off the dish then discuss with your fiance later.
Besides no one has the right to taste anyone it does more harm than good
But stella you are wrong. Maybe because u married oyibo. If really this is for test, then the girl fails it.
ReplyDeleteFirst and foremost, if it is for test, what is the mother-in-law testing her for?
1. Is it to know her level of temperament or her level of toleration or her level of acceptance?
If this is it, then she fail it woefully because she behaved exactly how the woman would have predicted. It means she came prepared for trouble because if it was her mum that gave her the food, she would have taken the soup to the kitchen and joke with her mum and ask y she forgot to put meat for her.
If also she is a smart girl who refuse to be provoked, she would have taken the soup to the kitchen and said, Mama; you forgot to put meat for me. Even if the woman replied negatively, she can smartly replied jokingly and tell the woman she washed the meat and she deserve at least 5 pieces of it as their pretty daughter in law. Atimes you convert your enemies or intended enemies to friends with your smartness/joking way of reacting to things.
2. Was it a taste to know if she will manage with her son when there is no money?
She also fail it because she should have eaten the soup to show the woman she can roll with whateva life throws at them when they get married.
Most of this mothers are smarter than this young girls who build their family value based on movies and social media hype. I am sure the woman was up to something and there is a sinister motive behind her action but the young lady failed woefully.
And if am the guy, I will do exactly the same and not pick her call for some days.
1000 likes
DeleteMy dear if d gal eats it.after the wedding she will distant herself from that woman.no test here.na she find d woman for ur son?this is a girl who is not ur daughter.coming to ur house for the first time,don't u new she has her own doubts
Deleteand fears .the mommy's boy cos of ordinary food.is not in d mil place to test her but to pray her son finds d right one.na dose ones dey end up marrying women who will cut the man off from the family.the will start running from one place to another
@ tenth , nooo , you are wrong. If the lady had eaten the food that automatically means she is a good wife. Can't you see that stupidity runs in some people's genes?
Delete17:38 hahahahahahahahaha
Deletecomment plus you 1000 likes are stupid...failed woefully cos MIL is God and marriage is a must must? testing somebodyschild for what? you dont pickmy calls the good riddance.men think marriage is doing only the woman a favour. its a mutually beneficial relationship.this has nothing to do with living life in movies....the mother was utterly disrespectful.. a visitor comes to your house, helps you cook food and meat then you serve her and cant give her out of the meat? fuck you and your testing. women are not slaves to marriage and you dont test someone like this..stupid male chauvinistic pig like you
Delete@ poster, first, your BF should be catapulted back to the stone age if that is the reason why he is not taking your calls. Be glad that you can actually see your In-laws in their true colours. Never lower your standard in life cause of love or marriage!
ReplyDeleteMy sis got married and they moved to the guy's family house despite my protest, mil insisted my sister has to be grinding pepper for stew manually, she said she dislikes the grinding machines. Pre marriage, she was eating it without any qualm, my sister vehemently rejected it.
Enough of these marriage tests.
ReplyDeleteIf everybody is put to different tests, we would all fail!
To the lady that posted this if you can read this, let me give you gist of mine. I work from Mondays to Fridays and some weekends too, so my ex husband wanted to take me to see his family cos we reside in Zaria while his parents reside in Bauchi, I have to get approval from my office to be away for Saturday and return on Sunday, we have told his parents about our coming, so I was expecting them to have made proper arrangements for us
ReplyDeleteWe took a car to Bauchi That Saturday morning, so I did not take breakfast so that we could meet up on time, guy man Said his parents said we should follow yankari motor, the one loading that day was that big one, I was so angry and not happy, I spoke to him that we should take all those small small vehicles so that we can get there on time, he Danone that his parents said we should take yankari, I don’t like traveling and I like to travel and get to my destination before 12 cos of the sun else I will fall sick, I have to be praying we get to Bauchi on time, At the pack we called them, as soon as we took off we called, we kept track of our movement till we got to Bauchi, it got to a time I heard the Mum asking him to ask me what I would like to eat,, I said rice will be ok. Atleast I know rice is something I can easily eat, my people when we arrived at there house, I got a warm welcomed, the parents were nice oh, I felt at home, the Mum then asked us to come so on the dinner table, when we set down she brought water melon, orange and she asked me to enter the kitchen and dish out soup. That was my first time of meeting his parents oh, imagine his mum asking me to enter her kitchen and dish out soup from her pot, I told her no mummy please assist us to dish out the soup, I am not really use to this, she said she just warm the soup that I should go ahead.
My people when I entered the kitchen to dish out the soup, when I opened the pot of soup, you will not believe what I saw, I saw old black okoro soup that has stayed long, the meat inside was only one, the soup was watering, I have to turn the soup to see if I could find other stuffs inside, I just dish the soup like that and brought it out to the dinner table, I was forcing myself to eat the food, the food refuse to pass, I saw her son rushing the food, me just took few swallows and said I was ok, I left the meat for him cos I could not imagine both of us sharing one small piece of meat, in my house I hardly eat soup that has over stayed, that okoro soup has lost it draw, you should know when okoro soup have over stayed, you have warm out all the draw out of the soup that was what I was as served the first day I met my mother and family in-laws. Anyways they are now my ex inlaws. In the evening of that Saturday his mother called me in the kitchen, gave me one spaghetti, crayfish, fresh pepper, onions and showed me where Maggi was located, soap, cooking pot and asked me to prepare dinner with it. I was like God what kind of temptation is this one? I had no choice cos after she gave me instructions she went to her master bedroom, to be with her husband, my ex went to the sitting room to watch movie, I was left alone in the kitchen, that was how I started cooking, after the cooking, I dished out my own with my ex, I dished for his younger brother and left the remaining one in the pot, the Mum said she and her husband will not be eating oh, she later sent his younger brother to come and fetch the food in the pot and bring it for them in their room, he took the food to them, after some times the Mum came to give me compliments that the food was delicious, I smiled and thanked her.
Just imagine! The girl child yaf suffered!! The thing is this abuse and the one from poster always comes from women. All the people advising poster to eat first, if they were men would they be treated like so? We have a bad culture all over Africa of treating the girl child badly and this has to stop. What am I saying, even gateman, maid, etc any human being must be treated with dignity biko
DeleteHmm what of me that hate meat? I will eat it happily,will meat fill my stomach? What is meat? People are too obsessed with meat, meat that has been contaminated with Fulani sperm.
ReplyDeleteIf that is the true story my dear, you did well, how can somebody serve you without meat a guest for that matter, in fact would be daughter in_law that you are suppose to serve the best meat.
ReplyDeleteWhat kind of stupid test is that ABI have you been licking their ass to be accepted???.
Continuation
ReplyDeleteShe separated us, she gave us different rooms to sleep, th bathroom was terrible, so dusty, dirty and very on kept, me that things irritate, I almost passed out from that bathroom, I never tot of taking pictures of the bathroom or the food, else I would have s Nd the picture for you guys to see, I just managed it like that and the next day being Sunday, we left 7am, I couldn’t take breakfast cos the environment was not ok for me. I didn’t consider the poor food, me cooking and bathroom as any big deal, not until the parents never showed up during our traditional marriage and even our wedding, my people his parents never showed any sign as if they did not accept me, the dad and mom called us that morning before we left to pray for us after the morning devotion, they blessed us oh, gave us their blessings and ask us to start marriage preparations, they even said no need to prolong courtship as to avoid temptations, both parents are pastors, the Mum is a lecturer, the both parents have a school, they stay in their own personal house, they have a car, so you can imagine that kind of family no meat inside soup, no meat or fish to prepare food n the evening, the parents only gave him. 10k, I don’t know if he lied about it, but that was what he told me, after the wedding I only talk with them on phone, I kept my distance, thank God the marriage is no more. That one is story for another day.
Stella soon I will send you the full gist, how I was played into marrying and how the marriage packed up within a year, I am fine now, we both are just separated, soon I will start filing for divorce, is well. The woman is his step mom but in all I felt the woman should have said nope to me from day one than pretending to like me and served me terrible soup, for not coming to the wedding was another terrible sign that showed they are not in support of the wedding, I guess I said nope cos I leave got brain that I was married to myself.
Anon 13:53..may God comfort. May God heal your broken heart and send you help from Zion. Keep bn strong. Your story is so touching. Don't give up,o.k. God will defiantly show up for you. The woman is demonic forget that pastor title she's using to cover up. I also feel she doesn't want her step son to have a happy home in life that's why she torn you guys apart. Karma will visit her when she least expected. She's evil.
DeleteEhen!!!!! so the marriage didn't work after the "test". single ladies stop pretending just to be accepted into your would be in-laws family, trust me you can't keep up with the pretense in marriage. I'm outta here
DeleteMy dear thank God u left.what u just narrated make me sick. What kind of family is this? My dear all inlaw family her not like this o.
DeleteYou can imagine, after everything the marriage did not work. So sorry poster, you shouldn't have married that man at all, wicked family.
DeleteI can eat food without meat if I choose to but I will never offer anyone food without meat, not even a maid.Then the height of it is you made her do the dirty work and then served her with no meat?? To what end? Marry your son abeg. That family will be drama filled. To hell with their son, what is yours is yours, no need for all these drama.
Honestly I have to hear that sentence maybe he or she is testing you from what exactly, this is way too much of a test biko but babe you too fuck up, eat small and get up no need for snapping it jare
ReplyDeleteWhen you go to someone's home you eat what is served. It was impolite to touch none of it, she should have eaten some of it at the very least. There is nothing wrong with a meal with no meat, no wonder people are eating what they shouldn't because they must eat meat by any means necessary. There is a time and place for everything this wasn't the occasion to play tit for tat, especially on your very first visit there. Would she have preferred if they served her dog meat or bush rat instead...Mtschhw.
ReplyDeleteNot by force, she didn't want to eat it. The 'boys' family is useless. I am sure if Otedola or Dangote or Adenuga's daughter goes to such a house they will lick her feet and won't remember such test and serve her like a princess.
DeleteYes, her choice, but she does not know what happened. The meat could have not been cooked properly, tough, or didn't taste right and instead of serving it they decided better to leave it out. She does not know what happened, she came to her own conclusions without any proof. If the man is decent enough for her to accept his engagement, then why is the source that he sprung from useless as you call them? The only reason she sent this in is because the relationship is not what it used to be, she insulted his mother, but expects him to feel the same about her. His mother is the woman who raised him and made him the man that she can feel worthy of sharing her life with, so why would she assume a bad tree can give life to good fruit. She is not truly insulted, she is just worried about her engagement and I don't wrong the fiancée for his change of face, that's is his mother, he can have as many wives as he wants, but you only get one mother. She should learn to get her facts before she accuse someone and do not insult anyone's mother. No man in my life will have the power to say anything negative about my mother, keep it to yourself, even if it is true that is my mother you don't get any access to speak against her to me. FOH.
DeleteRead what you typed slowly,I mean very slowly and ask yourself if you made any sense @ 00.19??
DeleteIt's just meat for crying out loud!!! Just eat the vegetable soup or ask mother in law if she forgot to put meat in your plate bcoz u like meat oo, and tell her you even helped her wash it...ofcoz all this politely. There's no big deal here really, I just taya for Naija gehs mentality.
ReplyDeleteHow does passing this test guarantee a successful marriage?you've not met wicked scheming women that will pas this test,then deal with you after marriage? Archaic people! Make dem carry thier badluck go front abeg!
ReplyDeleteLife has different angle and patterns. People's background and upbringing differs. Some people can easily tolerate some vices in other people but cannot overlook certain traits.
ReplyDeleteNobody knows why the MIL decided to serve her food without meat which is not a good one for whatever reasons.
Could it be stinginess on the part of the MIL ?or she's just trying to be funny. As for the lady, Have you eaten meat before? Can she afford to buy meat? Yes.
This is where maturity comes in. Eat the food as if nothing happens. Then, talk to the person you're directly involved with to know what actually went wrong.
Maybe the maid took the meat for herself
ReplyDeleteI think I will eat small, thank her and make comments about meat not being good for the body. Any day she visits my house, I will serve her food without meat, if they ask I will still jokingly remind them that meat is not good for adults.
ReplyDeleteI will give them side eye and eat the food and marry her sin , whenever she comes to my house, I will also test her too by not giving her meat in any food I give her too. Lol
ReplyDeleteThank God I didn't marry such mother in-law, when I went to visit her if I want to do anything for her,she will tell him before you came to see me I was doing my thing myself without any help, so I will tell her let's do it together instead of her doing it alone.
I will give them side eye and eat the food and marry her sin , whenever she comes to my house, I will also test her too by not giving her meat in any food I give her too. Lol
ReplyDeleteThank God I didn't marry such mother in-law, when I went to visit her if I want to do anything for her,she will tell him before you came to see me I was doing my thing myself without any help, so I will tell her let's do it together instead of her doing it alone.
At the end of the day, his rubbish doesn't determine if they marriage will last, this stupid world believe that maltreating women is the best way of discipline women, the woman is always tested,advised yet the men are egostic, dirty, useless and the society is OK with that, the men are allowed to fuck around and the women shamed not forgotten that the men fucks a woman and not a goat, a raped victim is been insulted for been raped but the rapist is left alone, if we don't try to change this our girls will keep on been shamed,maltreated and victimized n the name of testing , checking if she is a good material.
ReplyDeleteI won't eat the food. Whoever served it as ulterior motive and because I'm not sure what the motive is, I won't eat it. I'm shocked to read Naija kids that have been brought up to be careful about eating outside, saying because of marriage they will eat meatless food from mil when they know the woman has. You have to have shame na. If I have meat plenty and I don't serve my guest, I'm telling the guest she's not welcome. Get some sense and go away from my house. It happens too when you stay with people in the abroad. First few weeks plenty meat. When Dem don tire , small small meat or chicken go start. Means it's time to go
ReplyDeleteYou did d right thing.men like that don't even know when to stand for their wife if his family is crossing
ReplyDeleteboundaries
What kind of soup first of all is this? Looks like it was regurgitated! What test for goodness sake? Let's stop this PRETENSE!
ReplyDeleteIf this is a test to know HOW good SOMEONE is for her CHILD, sorry is her NAME! I rarely eat outside, courtesy demands you treat VISITORS with RESPECT and DIGNITY. Doesn't matter even if she is pregnant for her son, what if they are married mama visits the first time and is given food WITHOUT meat! This is 2018, all this test test, is CRAP.I trust my mum, i learnt from her you make sure EVERY VISITOR leaves your home HAPPY. That's how Sarah and Abraham got ISAAC. The Eba sef is too much and soft, soup splashed everywhere. I no chop. I wouldn't have taken a picture but be conscious around that woman. We HUMANS make life difficult sometimes.The woman i thought would have been my MIL, the first day i slept over, i woke up to freshly cooked meal in cooler but she was bidding her time kill herself not me! Shit like this don't sway me. I learnt through experience. Abegii...
Longthroat me will go and serve meat for myself or alert mother in-law to be that they “mistakenly” didn’t put meat in my soup shikena. I don’t beef with two things food and money 😂
ReplyDeleteIf she ate the food ,married the guy and MIL starts maltreating her and husband takes his mothers side,she writes chronicles to SDK and narrates every thing from the beginning,BVs would have said didn't she see the sign while they were dating?Why did she eat food without meat the first time she visited?She wanted to become Mrs and settled.Double standards
ReplyDeleteI will rather confirm my suspicion than assume and left in doubts. I will take the soup to her and ask her jokingly for my share of the meat. There's no point pretending what am not. Whatever she says will determine my next action, but if she did it intentionally,I will eat the food and take a decision on whether I want to continue on leave based on my conclusion. Been married for years now and my nlaws knows I don't pretend.
ReplyDeleteIs that the first time she will be served food in that house?
ReplyDeleteDoes she know the woman as a meat hoarder? These questions I like her to answer first.
Finally She did wrong by not eating that food, two things are she should have done, 1.eat the food & happily greet the woman & if before she has eaten in that house with meat she can then smartly tell the woman about the maid serving her food without meat/fish.
Me I have seen some relatives that hoard meat like crazy & in my house we always gist & laugh about it, no big deal, it's just lack of respect & manners to refuse food served clean not withstanding if there's meat or not. She can only reject if she noticed some dirt or something bad & call the attention of the woman to it.
Again I don't see any sense in testing anybody, if that guy dumped her then she should be happy cos that kinda man is of no good.
The love of meat is too much. I cannot believe a grown person refusing to eat a meal because they did not get meat. Is meat life? No wonder you have ppl eating unclean things that even demons would not consume because of their lust for flesh. I routinely cook vegetarian and vegan meals, yes I eat meat, but I don't need to have it everyday or expect that I must be served meat as a guest to consider them a good host.
Delete@ 17.31, what do you know? Even if we break your head , will you still get it? For your mind now the bone of intention is " mere meat".
DeleteContention I mean
DeleteYes, mere meat, you said it! Even if all she got was juice and water would she complain they did not lay out food? If they gave her crackers and cheese would she complain that she did not get butter. If they did not offer her even cold water what would be her complaint then? Like I said, the love so many of you have for meat have you eating all things evil that only give you diseases instead of nourishment. Many of you have eaten what you shouldn't and in some cases don't even know the source of the flesh you consume because you can't see meat and let it pass you by. On top of her ridiculous feelings she is accusing someone of insulting her without proof. Bout she has never eaten a meal without fish or meat before...okay then.
DeleteOh stupid stupid! It is not about the meat itself. How
DeleteAbout that she washed the meat and cooked it? How about that she wasn’t eating with the family?
How about that they didn’t even cate how she left?
If you read the story carefully, you will
Wonder if that is how you treat someone that comes to your house for the first time?
Or is it because she wants to marry your son?
She now she has to be treated like a beggar?
Tested?
And she’s supposed to not have any self esteem so she can
Be seen as humble?
Is that humility?
Would she have been regarded as having ‘good home training’ if she had eaten the food and then helped wash plates afterwards?
Those are the questions and they point to motive
you guys are so dumb and stupid its amazing....dont your thick skulls get it? is it only about not eating meat? how can someone help you cook something and you cant offer her out of it? a first time visitor? if your son brings a girl home he wants to marry is she not important enough to be treated as a VIP? use your brains, this is not about just meat, it is about how she was perceived as not important..
DeletePoster I totally support you, if your fiance and his family don't value you, the Lord will give you a man that will value you and treat you like a queen. I would scold my mother if she dares treat my woman like this. I know she is even not that kinda person. Would she allow her daughters to be so treated. Test ko Mess ni. It is even good because it has enabled you to see the hidden side of your man. Borrow yourself sense. Value yourself, don't cheapen yourself. Good luck to you.
ReplyDeleteI'm wondering why the man do not respect the decision of the girl.....the family tested the girl, the girl responded by testing the family.
ReplyDeleteWhatever you accept, becomes your standard...
If there was no meat in the house, the girl would have been wrong...
For the mere fact that she washed the meat, make the act to be witchcraftcy..
As a visitor, that girl deserved the best meal.....
Reject the devil and he flee from thee...
You have no excuse for calling him back....
He failed your test too, for not coming back to you...that means in times of challenges he will Leave you alone
Reject the devil and he flee from you
You should have told them you are not hungry and packed the food, taking pics and sending out is wrong. I blame you. Do you want your guy to beat his mom up because she did not give you meat? You are not smart.
ReplyDeleteNo , of course not to beat his mum but the man deserves to know that she will not accept being treated with disrespect or disdain!
DeletePoster
ReplyDeleteThey are not testing to know if you are greedy
Your fiance's family want to know if you are going to accept them and take them as your family. If your mother serves you food without meat, you should say, mommy you forgot to put meat ooo. Same with your fiance's family. Be vocal enough to voice what you need. If you say nothing, then eat the food. If you had said , mommy you forgot meat and they say No then you have a valid reason.
A family you will take as your own cannot serve you food and you snap it to show your fiance. Is that how you will handle issues in future? Reporting to your fiance at all times at every issue you notice. Or maybe you walk out at every issue you have with the family. You have to hold your own at every front. There are alternative resolution methods to apply. This is the time to let them know the type of person you are. You want meat, say Mama I want meat. You want fish, Mama I want fish. Crack joke ontop, download the food , drink glass of water, take your plate to the kitchen, wash the plate if they allow you, then go home.
You are about to enter another stage of your life that takes a lot of tolerance, vocality, patience, boundaries and wisdom.
Let me be honest with you. If you love a man and you meet his mother especially it is your first time and she has not shown you any animosity. If she serves you soaked garri, you will eat that garri like it is the best food ever.
KING XOXO MYSTERY
To show false humility!
DeleteThis case sound s different cos apparently there was meat, which she saw and washed, and cooked and saw others eat!!
Haba, Xoxo, where your brain go today?
l will let that food untouched .
ReplyDeleteFor a first time visitor, the presentation of that lunch is very poor. I would personally make sure l eat before l go visit. I would not have eaten the food and l would not have said anything to my fiancé either. I personally think the maid did not like her and switched their plates. I hope the so called fiancé was not bedding his mom's help and then turn around to take his fiancée there. I think the help did it. There is no MIL, that will serve her DIL food without even one piece of meat. By the way, nor be dry fish l de see inside the soup? Maybe they made the soup with dry fish only and the goat meat she saw might have been for dinner or pepper soup. Anyway, l don't think it is a good test. Dem for put money see if e go disappear.
ReplyDeleteHaha! Gbam!!
ReplyDeleteFood fa
ReplyDeleteSmh
Can’t deal