STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
UNROMANTIC MARRIAGE
Hi Stella and fellow bvs
I have an issue bothering me in my marriage.
I met my now husband 5 years ago. he is 14 years older than i am(30/44).when i met him i realised he wasn't the romantic type, but he was very nice. i guess i was blinded by other things that i choose to ignore the romance side being a very romantic girl myself.
I am suffering in silence Stella as i get almost none existing romance that is meant to happen between husband and wife. I could count the number of times he has kissed me in this year. we live like flat mates, no hugging except i nag and nag for it. i can sit beside him all day and he wont even draw me close or romance me. or s'x life is more or less like a chore, not spontaneous.
I have called family meeting severally on this issue and he keep saying he will change. I have threatened him with divorce, but it seems he doesn't want to leave our little boys, he is a doting dad. He has said several times that he doesn't know how to play love and cant change. i just feel like i am stuck in this marriage Stella, i want another romantic man but i am scared of my children's future.
They are boys and training boys abroad alone is not easy, most bad boys come from broken homes. I love him but i am not fulfilled and happy. should i force a separation? and look for another man? or should i get a side guy that can satisfy my pleasure and just keeping up with my hubby? if i decide to date someone else, should i do it to his face to spite him, maybe he will buckle up and realise he is loosing me? or should i date on a low key?
I am only 30, imagine spending the rest of my life this way. mind you he doesn't abuse me. I wish i could turn back the hands of time and choose wisely😢 .thank you Stella
*Jesus Christ!!!!...what do women really want?you marry a good man but because he is not romantic you are planning to leave him?Do you want to pass contentment looking for Roses?what if the Romantic one abuses you?Because he doesnt do things spontaneously?but he has told you he isnt like that?
*Jesus Christ!!!!...what do women really want?you marry a good man but because he is not romantic you are planning to leave him?Do you want to pass contentment looking for Roses?what if the Romantic one abuses you?Because he doesnt do things spontaneously?but he has told you he isnt like that?
Be there looking for who will help you validate why you should cheat you hear?
The path you plan to take is full of finger biting and regrets.....your poison is another man's meat!!!
*tonugeclick*
Naija girl's definition of romance:
ReplyDelete1. Money
2. Ego
3. Kudi
4. Dollars
You this anon you don't have work. You havnt added abroad husband there.
DeleteLet me tell you something money is very important in relationship and it adds to the love. Poster does your husband give you gifts, money etc.
I am in a very dead relationship if not becos I want to marry. The guy is stingy and we are always fighting. I just started dating a very rich married man just to remove my mind from relarnshp issues.
This man is everything,romantic,buys gifts,credits my acct,any small issue I have he is there to solve it. Be it gen issue,mechanic he will send someone to my house. I don't even feel bad cheating.
Poster do anything to make yourself happy.
Hahahha meanwhile am the opposite oh. Hubby is the romantic one,me i no get time for all that. Poster no worry oh,pls pack your bags and leave me alone. A better woman who deserves him would find him.
DeleteWhat do women really want??????????????????
DeletePoster always wear sexy things infront of him 😘😘 sleep nake infront of him except he is gay that is wen his body will not move ones in a while
If he isn't gay abeg stick your man o o the land ain't greener in the other side
😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘
Madam leave him let me come and take over. I'm not romantic. Didn't you notice dt in him before you married him or you were thinking he will change.
DeleteLook, all Men are not thesame, people are different and were brought up differently hence the difference in behaviour. Some times in life, you need to accept and make do with what you have. But if you are not happy then waka.
@15:26
DeleteYou as you just confirmed what that anonymous wrote there. You no dey shame? You are opening your dirty hole for a married man and you had the audacity to come here and vomit all these rubbish? If you ever get married and someone else begin to f*k your husband you will come here ranting and raging like hurricane Michael. Please spare us the story of your illegitimate liaison!
Fan Emmanuel, come and see side chick above ooo. Abeg bring your whips and koboko.
DeleteAhh someone once told me that when you have it all you start creating problems for yourself even when there’s non, sex would become your problem.
DeleteYou don’t have work, you want to cheat to spite him because of common sex, I can see achievements, money and other worries of life are not your problem then go ahead and fine someone who will cheat on you with everything in skirt but show you all the affection you need.
Sometimes we can’t have it all, you have a good dad, a provider, doesn’t beat you, doesn’t insult you or cheats on you and yet you call family meeting on his head because of kissing and hugging, if he doesn’t kiss you please kiss him.
You may think your action (getting a side boo) is justified until your kids find out and never want to have anything to do with you, when you become a parent you can never be selfish
Maybe he did a lot of that when he was young and now male menopause don set😆
DeleteSo ad nice as your husband seems to be like you just portray here his crime is his inability to romance you....smh. it is well.
ReplyDeletePoster, you cant teach an old dog new tricks, just as he told you, hes not the romantic type, if you like send him to a School of Romance in Paris, he'd graduate & still not know how to show it, all youve been doing so far is dragging a horse to water, it wont drink unless it feels like! Now youre contemplating cheating, maybe u already have someone online telling u all the things u need to hear & how he'd tumble you to cloud9, weldone!! We all make sacrifices b4 & in marriage, no marriage can stand the test of time without major sacrifices, do your research!!
DeleteA wise Ukraine globetrotter said "The ultimate display of love is beyond hugs & kisses, its sacrifice".... he was right!
You jumped into marriage without considering 'forever' is tooo long to live without romance, now ure feeling the heat & calling family meeting? You werent deceived my dear! Maybe u would have been more specific with ur prayer point, all u prayed for like most young ladies is for a Good Man! Prayer answered!!
Dont let your selfish desires ruin lives, your kids & including yours, all for mumu romance! Last Last, youre the one wearing the heels, u know where it pinches.
1 million likes, well said oxygen well said.
DeleteOr she married a closet homosexual. 💁🏾♀️
DeleteIf he comes home with flowers and kisses, una go write Stella say na flower I go chop?
ReplyDeleteNa romance you go chop? Madam get busy. You can as well do that by commenting on every post on SDK.
ReplyDeleteHahaha @ commenting on every post on SDK.
DeleteFan I am Officially done with you, 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 hahahababababab, she Inukwa she should get busy by commenting on every post. 😂😂😂.
DeletePoster pls get busy Inu. You don't have problem Biko.
FAN go and whop that side vulture in Anonymous 15:26 up there.
DeleteYou guys are belittling poster's problem. If it is a problem for her, then it is a problem for her. That is why she is here for advice. Poster I think you married him thinking you could change him. Only God can change a man. Go to God in prayer, since it affects you it is not a small issue. Also try to engage him with things he likes,eg food if that is what he likes, then use that opportunity to bring up how you would like him to make you happier in your relationship, while showing him appreciation for being a good husband. Also try to dwell more on his good points in your mind. There are many women who would give a lot to have what you have. I believe you are not perfect yourself and I don't think he is contemplating leaving you.
DeleteChai, the Fan ehn!
DeletePlease owners of this shade, @you might as well get busy by commenting on every post, come at night with trailer to come and pack it.
Please.
Chai!!!!!
Sister why are you crying? Tell us, why are you crying? You knew he wasn’t romantic but you married him. No one forced you into marriage. You can’t have your cake and eat it.
ReplyDeletena Zeeworld i blame.
DeleteNo telemundo. Zeeworld nor dey kiss or romance. They just look into each other's eyes n d next thing the woman is pregnant.
DeletePoster divorce him already n go find romance. Chronicle is always open 2 send in ur story n we'll definitely b here 2 read n LOL.
Foolish woman!
ReplyDeletePoster yii ni Problem mehn!
ReplyDeleteIf he isn't the romantic type, you teach him. Whenever you're with him on the couch, put his hand on your breasts and start using it to rub them. Make the first move if he doesn't, he is your husband not a boyfriend.
Calling Family meeting on top 'your husband is not romantic.'
You're not serious!
You knew you like sex more than peace of mind but you chose a man who was the opposite. Hope you know that one person cannot be the answer to all your unanswered prayers? It is wrong to search for all answers from one person. One human can to give you all you need out of life, they can support and cheer you on but it is wrong to expect them to fulfill it all.
ReplyDeleteJust as you are not perfect, you’d certainly have behaviors that your hubby has also chosen to live with, why can’t you live with this too? If you want to cheat do it with your chest and stop looking for an excuse. You knew you couldn’t live with this but you went ahead to have kids not one child but kids. Keep fooling yourself ma, you’d see what you’re looking for.
Good point! She has her own shortcomings hes learnt to live with, in her mind shes perfect cus he dsnt rub it on her face!
DeleteShe has someone shes comparing him to... maybe an Ex or an online side dick waiting to thrust, a woman can Never seriously consider a divorce on these terms if shes not sure of the availability of it outside her home, standby prick de.
Selfish woman.
Lmao Doppelganger why are you crazy like this Hahahahahahaha@like sex more than peace of mind! Poster I understand how frustrating it is to be with an unromatic man. But let me tell you, the type of man you are searching for in the romance area would be hard to come by where our men are concerned. Now lets reason this together, do you think if you leave your husband and become a single mother that a romantic man would be your priority? Your priority would be a man who can at least take you in love you and your boys. I promise you, if the next man is a rigid as anything but cares for you and your boys you would not complain about romance, you'd just be grateful. I really wish your husband can give you a trial separation without grudges so you can go outside and see for yourself how men are dealing with women, single mothers are even treated worse then you would realize your husband is an angel compared to a lot and you would take the lack of romance like that. No infidelity, no domestic violence, good daddy, he has sex with you just not "romantic", has tried to change, you knew he was this way before you got married. Aunty na small pikin they do you. Maybe he was your first boyfriend and you think movies are real life. Nothing is out there o. You should have taken a survey. Ask Nigerian women, African women in a questionnaire is your partner romantic? Does he buy you flowers? Does he hug and kiss you always? Does he take you out to the sunset or moonset? You would realize this phenomenon is continental. Do not lose a good man over this. Try and cheat and see nah. That's just disrespecting yourself and life, it would not affect your husband and you won't even get the romance because you would be hurrying in and out! You strike me as somebody who is immature. You have not experienced any hardship in life yet thats why.Be guided.
DeleteOr probably she is already seeing someone.
DeleteThank God she didn't lie about the integrity of the husband.
#hadeyhalaba
You saw him and married him as he was.
ReplyDeleteAs he was in the beginning, so he is and so he shall be.
Just summarily tell us that you want to ride another rod. But you know what? That's the beginning of your end!
Amen to that.
DeleteYou have a peaceful & loving man & home, it's romance that is your problem. You must have an idle mind.
Sorry poster but you are very stupid and a fool at 30. Just because of romance and hug and kiss ba you want to break your home.
ReplyDeleteYou are an idiot sorry to abuse you but you serve it.
I laugh in capital letters. Madam you are not serious, in fact you have no issue. It's small brain that is worrying you. If your husband is not romantic, start being romantic towards him and watch him change. When you are sitting beside him, be the 1st to kiss him. Take his hand and wrap it around yourself etc. Little by little he will get use to it. If divorce is for little things like This, how many marriages will remain? Ah ah.
ReplyDeleteShe wants a man that will be romantic to her Funke,sola,isioma,Ada,Aisha, Binta and Udeme.
DeleteHe will share that your romance with various side-chicks.
As in ehhhhh
Delete🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Your village people have finally remembered you madam.You had better remove the thought of another man from your head and concentrate on your marriage.Inukwam romance!
ReplyDeleteOMG her villiage people ve gotten her address, hian madam how u go open ur eyes destroy ur home for wetin, teach him ooo b4 had I know go enter ooo biko listen to us
DeleteDon't you ever leave your husband or cheat in him
ReplyDeleteDear poster so sorry that you find yourself in that position but your hubby has got lots of good sides and some women will be willing to take it like that.
ReplyDeleteIf he's not spontaneous then be spontaneous in your marriage by give him the kisses and all.
What you should know is you can't always have a perfect partner.
You can be romancing him and try being naughty with him.initiate d romance and make yourself happy.dont allow him rest he may slowly start playing along
ReplyDeleteIt is like you are bored and have started talking to those deceiving boys on social media and looking for an excuse to cheat
ReplyDeleteDon't sha send any one of them your nude pictures we don't want any drama or naked mother of three trending.
You are getting carried away by your friends who show romantic pictures on social media you have no idea what they are really going through. Continue to disregard your man till another woman who values him grabs him
No, please poster send them. We will download them here. Patapata if Stella censors it, we will still see it elsewhere and download full portrait! Maybe that is when your eyes will clear.
DeleteNonsense!
It's not about romance na. Can't u guys read between the lines. It's about sex. She's not getting any. That's frustrating. Plan one day to have the kids go stay with family. Let it be just you and him and no distractions and try to have sex with him for the weekend. If you can't get him to respond after you've tried a few says or weeks, insist on counseling. If he won't go, then start wrapping up this marriage in your heart. You don't need a roommate. You need a husband
ReplyDeleteToo much zee world and telemundo!
ReplyDeleteSigh!
Poster you deserve an e-slap! You knew he was not romantic but you married and you are here saying yen yen yen...something is wrong with your head. You are even contemplating cheating, better divorce that man for a better woman to marry. As for you, you can turn yourself to cheap whore, no body cares.
ReplyDeleteMadam i dont know what you want o. Shebi the problem is only that he does not do romantic stuff or initiate sex & not that he doesnt want sex at all.
ReplyDeleteIf he doesn't initiate kisses hugs & love making you should then be the one taking the lead,you dont have to talk or nag,just sexily & silently pull it on him,i bet he wont push you out or reject you. Better dont use your hand to destroy your life .
Women always want to eat their cake and have it. Looking for a reason to cheat!! Don't worry when you finally get what your looking for you will rest. Maybe the man should give you some bills to care of, so Ur brain will reset a little..
ReplyDeleteYou want to leave ur hubby cos of romance? Who e epp? You knew he was like that, but since u like it, do the romance, teach him, hug him, kiss him and see if he can change and give u what you want in return.
ReplyDeleteSocialmediaawardsng
To vote @stelladimokokorkus as BLOGGER OF THE YEAR
Text sma18 stella to 33352
I can relate with you poster because i am in the same situation. Trust me its not easy living this way. But looking back to my ex's that were very very romantic i will chose my husband over and over again. Look for other things to occupy your mind.
ReplyDeleteMy dear tell her o. This is your husband not your boyfriend.
DeleteNa small pikin dey worry u
ReplyDeleteI am not romantic seriously but my wife always force me to kiss,cuddle,carry her and other fire play b4 action.you can never get all you want in marriage but love surpasses all..
ReplyDeleteMadam you better hold on to that man or else somebody is going to hold him for you
God bless you sir.
DeleteIf you don’t change and start doing those things she is teaching you, very soon the fire will die and she will start looking elsewhere, you better start learning fast, read book, google to know more now that she is teaching you.
Deleteso he should change to suit her abi? didnt she know he was like that? If she wants kiss or hug or fuck, hes not running na
DeleteDid my husband type this?😂😂😂😂😂
DeleteBaby is this you?
DeleteStart what you want in your marriage
ReplyDeleteMadam,you can teach him.Kiss him first, hug him.Give all you desire to him consistently he will change.Some men are like that.I am a very express person and understand how you feel. You feel starved emotionally. Is not enough to get a divorce.
ReplyDeleteTeach him how to romance you, do to him everything you want him to do to you, with time he will learn.
ReplyDeleteJust keep shut you don’t know what is like to teach an adult who has unromantic follow come attitude till you are there. You teach them and no interest do you think the man will change? Na follow come, I was there before now so I understand what is like.
Deleteyou cant teach such a person, its not in him, its not in him... if u attempt teaching him, the way he'd do it sef will irritate u, leave am like that.... accept or waka
DeleteMy husband older than I am. Like yours. He wasn’t the romantic type. Sex a chore for him. I love him and that’s more important to me than anything else.
ReplyDeleteHe has gradually become sensitive to my needs. Iv even forgotten he isn’t the romantic type. Can’t wait for him to start making money to over spoil me!
He’s my best friend and I’m his. We are not perfect but we are working towards having a happy successful marriage and for me that’s enough.
It’s even your chronicle that brought back memories of his old ways. I had forgotten about it. The grass isnt always greener on the other side but it’s all up to you at the end of the day.
Youre so silly, i feel like slapping you. You knew he wasnt romantic, you married him for other reasons you were satisfied with. Now you want to divorce or cheat because you want romance.
ReplyDeleteAnd who told you bad boys come from broken homes? Mscheew!! You dont deserve an epistle from me.
I swear I couldn’t get past that bad boys from broken home garbage! Poster It's better to let someone think you are dumb than to come here and prove it.
DeleteIs like u people do not know what lack of romance causes women,it distabilities them makes them bitter and sad and wish there husband dead so they can b free.Money is not everything in life,once in a while we need love care and attention. this is what most Nigeria women are passing true.Stella I disagree with u on dis.
ReplyDeleteSo we should encourage her to cheat abi???
DeleteDidnt shr know what she was entering into??
When some women are saying only money makes them cum
DeletePoster most of them do not understand you at all, I was in your shoe some years back but I decided to let myself out of that bondage and get a better life, the day you make up your mind on what you want is the day your fears will go. I married my husband with the promises of going to drive me crazy with romance but after weeding night what did I get? You need to see our chat before wedding, you need to see live notes he drops for me before I said yes, u needed to see caring and loving messages I get from him, we chat till 12 mid night every day, we still talk early morning before work on each day. After wedding guy man just went solo cos he got me, i cried, complained, begged, but he wouldn’t listen, I reported to his family no way, I tot prayer could solve it, one day I stopped deceiving myself and told myself the truth that it was follow come, yes is an inbuilt, you either take it or leave it, he did it then cos he wanted to win me over but he cannot do more, he told me this is who he is you either take me or you walk away.
ReplyDeleteYou guys don’t know that love, hugs, kisses, romance are the stuffs that can calm an angry partner, money is good but without good sex, kisses, romance is useless to a woman. Check happy women or babes you find out is good sex that drive them happy, when you screw your wife, babe, gf well or even your husband well don’t you see the smile, happiness, sweet names and romantic gift you get from them? Someone is here saying romance is nothing, during marriage classes we were told that love, sex, romance, kisses,hugs is what will bind you both in this school of marriage, why do you think that each time couples fight and have sex they settle their fight? You think God does not know why he created sex? No sex, romance is the soft spot that makes marriage what enduring.
I walked away cos I was married, never satisfied, no romance, I cannot be naked and he touch me, we can not be together and he will be romancing me, I have to remind him, touch my breast, touch my hair, kiss me, buy me gifts, take me out, send me love messages or text, I got fed up and decided to look else where by walking away from the marriage,I cannot waste all my life with a man that is zero percent unromantic, if you want to die at 30 with such man go ahead and die, I was 27 when I signed out of that toxic marriage, how long will I continue to be putting his penis inside my totoh? How will will I continue to teach him and no improvement? But he learn how to drive a car in weeks, how to make meals in months, why don’t you Chang and make your wife happy? Is wickedness cos you shower them with romance, kisses, hugs, sex, BJ, crazy sex life and yet they all will enjoy it and scream harder but they cannot do same for you, can’t you see is selfishness? Your boys will be fine just make up your mind and work towards your happiness which is the key. If you die unhappy no one is going with you, the man will go get another babe, do not die in silent. I am happily today cos I got what I wanted, I got a man with cash, love, romance, kisses, hugs, lick my plates to the call and I am very happy cos love and romance find me.
You really nailed it, the funniest is a lot of people criticing the poster are the same situation or just plain hypocrites.
DeleteThe issue here is that the poster knew the type of man she was marrying. It would have been a 100% different if he was romantic at some point and suddenly changed. She knew exactly what she was getting into and now she’s crying wolf.
DeleteWow what a story, thank God you later found love and romance, so happy for you.
DeleteBut your case is different from poster's own, yours pretended and lied to you just to get you but she knew what she was getting into, she knew the man was not romantic and doesn't like sex and she still went ahead and married him. There are other ways she can about it apart from cheating or divorcing
run from this advice please
DeletePoster I can relate as this is my story right now, just that we don't have kids yet. How am I supposed to get pregnant when TTC and there's no intimacy. Loveless marriage, always on his phone, so secretive and discuss everything with his family. He even told me a month that's he's fasting until further notice but to outsiders he portrays himself to be the best man. I just want out cos I can't Continue with this life as its a long road. A lot of women suffer in silence, some cheat cos of these selfish men. He should go to hell and marry his family as am done.
ReplyDeleteWhile i will not disregard your feelings cos you are right for feeling the way you do. Romance is an essential part of a marriage but there are more important things that make-up marriage which from your write up your husband has. While don't you overlook this just i am sure apart from romantic you also lack 1 or 2 important qualities which i am sure if ur husband was to open up u would be surprised. Firstly you met him like this, he did not pretend. What can you do? Keep teaching him, be patient with him, be the romantic one, go online and read up stuffs you can do to spice up your marriage. You think divorce is beans? Moreover the lives of 2 kids are involved while you worry about your romance think of the implications. Now finally let me remind you of the saying "the grass is always greener on the other side" until you reach there. There are many good things in your marriage learn to celebrate it and be appreciative of it. You may never know what you have until it's gone. You might think if you had a romantic partner you would be fulfilled but see you see romance na and you will then realize it is not everything. At least he does not beat you, womanize nkor no, drunkard no, bad father no, lazy,
ReplyDeleteNo, dirty no, you see ma you no get problem. If you can overlook this weakness please do. As for validation to cheat you won't find it here.
Well, I married my husband when quite early too and he too was not the romantic person too, no hugs, no holding of hands etc I thought it was okay until I found out that he not only sleeps with different girls but had an addiction sleeping with Harlots. I understood where all the no hugs, no kisses were coming from...He would even call them dearie and honey but my name was my name....my dear you might need to dig deeper on that oh!
ReplyDeleteHuman being needs are insatiable. Madam , be contented with what you have. No man is a complete and total package. Life is you win some and lose some.
ReplyDeleteSince you like other side of him, then initiate and spice up your marriage with romance. Initiate and do everything you desire him to do. You can't continue to wait for him.
Please don't scatter your home out of foolishness. This is a situation that you can provide solutions without much stress. Initiate the romance Biko.
What are you doing sitting beside him? Sit on his legs joor
ReplyDeleteLooks for ways to change him and you've got to make the move as he know he doesn't have it in him.
1. Be a naughty woman in bed, he wouldn't resist you
2. Send him nasty flirty texts from time to time
3. Send him explicits pictures of your inner "interior"
4. Put your hand under the dinning table and rub his dick and balls
5. Lie down on him, he'll get used to cuddling you.
Just be in his face and in his space until he gets you into his system and if all that doesn't work.....locate MFM with his picture and pray😑
You shouldn't have married this man, what you wanted was different. Anyway why don't you go for therapy or see a counsellor together. And also try and initiate the romance when he is around and also be sexy and spice things up, take him on romantic date, read up more about things to make sex interesting in marriage.
ReplyDeleteWe all have flaws that our partners overlook although romance and sex is very important in a marriage and stop thinking of divorce or cheating, you will just complicate matters for yourself. You can't change a grown up man but with love and patience, everything will fall in place.
After trying all this and it doesn't work, then ignore him and buy a dildo and start moaning loudly ( when the Kids are away), most men doesn't like anyone sharing there women with them, also divert your attention to something else and let him beg for your attention, although these kind of men doesn't even notice sef.
On a second thought, hope he wasn't abused as a child? does he masturbate?
This kind of man will never go for therapy.
DeleteHe believes that's just the way he is. So the wife should either take him like that or bounce.
Poster, I'm sorry to hear this. I love PDA, hugs, kisses etc. So I understand you. The average Nigerian woman doesn't know what that is. They see it in the movies and think it's fairy tales. Unfortunately, most of you are so desperate to marry that even though you CLEARLY see signs of incompatibility, you rush in. You can never change anybody in marriage. Marriage only brings out people's true colours. And please understand, a Nigerian man going into marriage does not believe he has anything to change. He believes he is perfect the way he is and it is the wife's responsibility to change, adapt, compromise.
You have to make some tough decisions for yourself.
I don't know what to say with the way your mind is running madam,so cheating on your husband is the way to find romance?you are not thinking about the consequences of cheating?and then u are asking if he will change if you throw ur lover on his face?is he a dummy?get a grip madam and fight for what you want,be determined to get romance in your marriage and you WILL,if you say he is a good man how can you not express yourself with him and CONTINUE too ask for what you want?
ReplyDeleteI'm all for love and romance to I met my husband. His love and romance are just too much that it killed romance for me. My husband is the opposite of yours. He sends me love messages at work, every minute of the day, flowers and all. Calls nko. She we are at home nko, his own romance is too much abeg.
ReplyDeletelol.... wahala de oh, make una exchange
DeleteThere is nothing wrong with taking the lead!
ReplyDeleteI understand you...but please RULE OUT cheating - not even for him, for yourself. Respect yourself enough to know that any man who'll be willing to sleep with another man's wife has no morals. Your children will eventually find out and resent you for it.
ReplyDeletePlease flirt shamelessly with your husband. Be naughty. Initiate anything you'd like for you guys to do. Most importantly, accept him. You knew he was like this before you jumped in so see it all as part of the life that you chose.
Dear poster,I can relate.that's exactly what am facing. I think mine is worse sef...as in we hardy talk.once he gets back he just sleeps in the parlour. Initially I used to wake him and make him come to the room when we just got married about a year ago but now I have given up.it sounds as if am so desperate. He doesn't even give me money only for food .am soooo tired. Wish I didn't marry him. It is just my child and great family I have that make me happy.
ReplyDeleteWoman with their insatiable need. May God help us
ReplyDeleteYou knew quite alright he was not romantic before getting married to him, so initiate the romance and stop whining.
ReplyDeleteHi poster! I know how you feel! Why? Because I married a man who grew up without love (parents died early) . First year of marriage was hard because I am the definition of romance, it's still hard tho!
ReplyDeleteI married a good man and that is where my peace of mind and strength to over look his unromantic nature , his good with the kids, and chores and money😁!
So d secret is just relate with your spouse as a friend and take it one step at a time. I still get pissed at DH but I sleep and forget about it. He likes to gist me junk and I pretend to listen to d junk, d day he keeps to himself, bye! I also have a once in a month routine, we must hang out even if you like sleep off while we do😁! Am nautie like that, this country can be borrrring ! Honestly divorce is far from it. Take yourself shopping. To spa, and others , give yourself a good treat.
Lastly don't expect change anytime soon, just focus on what you can do with him once a month (I leave my kids with babysitter).
Hi poster! I know how you feel! Why? Because I married a man who grew up without love (parents died early) . First year of marriage was hard because I am the definition of romance, it's still hard tho!
ReplyDeleteI married a good man and that is where my peace of mind and strength to over look his unromantic nature , his good with the kids, and chores and money😁!
So d secret is just relate with your spouse as a friend and take it one step at a time. I still get pissed at DH but I sleep and forget about it. He likes to gist me junk and I pretend to listen to d junk, d day he keeps to himself, bye! I also have a once in a month routine, we must hang out even if you like sleep off while we do😁! Am nautie like that, this country can be borrrring ! Honestly divorce is far from it. Take yourself shopping. To spa, and others , give yourself a good treat.
Lastly don't expect change anytime soon, just focus on what you can do with him once a month (I leave my kids with babysitter).
what does it take for a man to be romantic? nothing really o. just read about it online and practice it. we all have different love languages. i for one can not marry an unromantic guy. kolowerk
ReplyDelete