A MARRIAGE THAT ENDED ON THE DAY OF THE WEDDING...
Please your humble opinions are needed here.
Someone I know who just got married two weeks ago is seeking for a divorce as a result of the wife's rude behaviour to his mother at the reception hall.
Please your humble opinions are needed here.
Someone I know who just got married two weeks ago is seeking for a divorce as a result of the wife's rude behaviour to his mother at the reception hall.
What transpired was that on the wedding day, when the wedding was almost ending, a couple from the mother in-laws' side came from a far distance to grace the occasion. They came in when everything tangible to offer them has finished.
A portion of food the bride left for her parents was the only good delicacy left. The mother in-law went to the daughter in-law and whispered to her to allow her collect small portion to serve those couple owing to the fact they came from a far distance to attend the wedding and it will be quiet unfair to let them go without offering food, but the lady refused bluntly that the food is for her parents.
After series of pleading from the mother in-law with no positive response, the mother in-law took a plate collected food from there to serve the guest. The daughter in-law took the food from her and poured it back to the cooler. Out of annoyance, the mother in-law slapped her and she slapped her back without hesitation.
The people around the scene told the husband immediately what happened. The man decided not to create a scene at the reception hall. Two days after he applied for a divorce. The case is on-going now. Despite the plea from his mother to forget and forgive the wife after all it was her the lady offended yet he refused.
Did the man act right?
If you are the man, what will be your action?
If you're the lady, was your action towards the mother in-law justified?
So, ladies and gentlemen what is your take on this?
NB: True life story, no fiction.
Hmmm awon feminists!
She returned a slap?Oh Dear!!!!!
The people around the scene told the husband immediately what happened. The man decided not to create a scene at the reception hall. Two days after he applied for a divorce. The case is on-going now. Despite the plea from his mother to forget and forgive the wife after all it was her the lady offended yet he refused.
Did the man act right?
If you are the man, what will be your action?
If you're the lady, was your action towards the mother in-law justified?
So, ladies and gentlemen what is your take on this?
NB: True life story, no fiction.
Hmmm awon feminists!
She returned a slap?Oh Dear!!!!!
I cant imagine that Food caused fight...what kind of poverty mentality is that?Jesus!!
Is the wife apologising or claiming she is right?
What was the food doing near her on her wedding day?
Well his thinking might be if she slapped his Mother on the first day of Marriage then anything is possible.....That Marriage is dead on arrival...Divorce is better ooooooooooooh!
Well his thinking might be if she slapped his Mother on the first day of Marriage then anything is possible.....That Marriage is dead on arrival...Divorce is better ooooooooooooh!
What a pity!!!
People getting married should take their eyes off the food and leave others to take charge...I wish them happy divorce!
Fabu.
ReplyDeleteFeminists should be allowed to drink water and drop cup mbok.
Like you ba? Yet you so-called feminithugs draw praxis from non-existential paradigms of human physiological order just to make unnecessary arguments. Theory isn’t experience!
DeleteInterestingly Doppelgänger is not commenting about the subject of the post but focusing on Stella’s comment. Very funny how you girls think. You run away from the subject because it relates to a woman’s reaction against HUSBAND’s mother. The kind of you who wouldn’t use wisdom in reaction to the HUSBAND’s mother’s action.
DeleteAwon feminist oshee. Please oihhhh happy divorce for them .any gurl try this with me!!? After whispering softly haba.... I will beat you blue black green yellow. And you will still marry my son and learn to be humble. Nkita ara
DeleteThis is stupid. Turn the tables around. Will the wife ask for divorce and will people support it. Give yourselves brain. If he wants a divorce. Let him go please. Rubbish
DeleteThe wife should have allowed the mother in-law to take some of the rice.
DeleteShe should have appointed someone to cater for her family's need for that day not hustling for food and drinks.
Wait!
DeleteWho is the mom in the first place to slap her?
What if she hadn’t reacted the way she did will the man still call for a divorce seeing as his mother cannot control her temper and he the groom, wouldn’t want his beloved wife to be subject to such in the future or will the groom ask that his temperamental mother should be forgiving and the bride apologise for refusing to feed her guest.
Also, if the girls family was aware of all that happened will they also insist on a divorce because they don’t want their child to be married to a man who’s mother cannot act accordingly in public and in this light, question the husband to be of the same character when he provoked ...DV
Why didn’t the mother in law keep some food as back up plan should anybody come late (just like the thoughtful girl did for her probably very busy parents who’s probably on medication and had not eating all day) why did she not think?!! What will happen if the girl hadn’t kept that food aside. Mother in law wouldn’t feed her guest or ?!?!
What the girl did by retaliating is wrong (not wrong on the ground of the woman’s status or age but in the light of acting civilised and addressing the issue later) with that SAID, no one is above/below a slap! If you slap first, you better be prepared to receive a sound slap and goodluck with your recovery. You asked for it, and you will not be denied of your request.
The lady should be grateful they are getting a divorce! It’s not the end of the world!
Jumi you are very wise..
DeleteOn the contrary jumi may your daughter in-law slap you on the day of her wedding becos of rice your son pay for becos of her parents after pleading with her to give you some, foolish woman
DeleteAnd Amastel assumes it was the man who paid for the rice .why are some Africans this stupid? May your mother In law also slap u on your wedding day. Who slapped who first?@ Amstel...so it ok for her to give a slap, but it wrong for her to take a slap? She had no right to slap that girl in the first place .I can bet, that food was made with the girls money. Why fight over food in the first place? This girl should leave this family.
DeleteStella ,what has feminist got to do with this issue?I am not in support of the girl slapping her mother in law but what right does the woman have to slap her too?We read about the lady whose in laws were slapping till the husband beat her to death,this was how it started.It is because of feminist you can blog because they have fought for us to have a voice,people keep misunderstanding feminism with cooking and not being submissive,all we ask is equal treatment,don't discriminate against women in the work place or refuse to employ them because they might get pregnant.My maternal grandfather refused sending his female children to school because they would end up married,my grandma fried Akara and sent her daughters to school and they were the ones who took care of him till he died.My grandma was a feminist even though she wasn't educated and doesn't know the meaning of feminism.And there are still men like my grandfather in this 21st century.Stella please educate yourself about feminism,you have a voice.Nigerians are always fighting over food.
DeleteI don't blame you. I blame the society that doesn't have jobs for everybody alike.
DeleteThere's nothing wrong with avoiding any subject matter you don't believe and addressing the one you feel concerned about.
DeleteThey should go their separate ways the marriage is doomed already. Self control should be the lesson here. Mother in law should have taken her guests somewhere and given them a treat. Daughter in law should have parted with some rice. Nobody should have slapped anybody in order for the other not to retaliate. Anon 19:51 I totally agree with you.
Hmmmm if they are fighting over rice now, only God knows what MIL and DIL will fight about after the wedding. Na there the battle for supremacy go start. E be like sey make dem kuku go their separate ways, unless each party involved can forgive from the heart.
DeleteFaceless anons so is ok for her to collect the plate from her mother in-law & return the rice in the cooler abi obviously you are senseless & mannerless like the foolish bride, she has no atom of respect in her for the mother in-law to seek permission from her shows how nice & respectful she is, but that girl is obviously a full blown goat infact she is a Jezebel, sorry my mother in-law won't cos am wiser than dragging food & drink on my wedding day,
DeleteFor Jezebel jumi am sure you can't afford my lifestyle even in your 10 lives so no need replying you on job hunt cos we create jobs for the unemployed but guess what? is by God's grace so I don't care about you
Even if she sponsor the wedding with her money she should compote herself cos she behaved like someone that saved her for years to buy a car only one for her to burn the 🚗 with her own hands by herself cos a mechanic spolied a wire
Hugs
Delete@Amstel...and you call me senseless for having a different opinion. You are not different from that quick tempered entitled mother in law. The girl said, No...why must she take the food by force? No means no. She could have just left, and talk this over with the girl later. But no, she decided to use violence. If you pull a sword, u die by a sword.
DeleteThank you Amstel!! Lots of girls here were born in the gutter, they lack basic home training.I would not shame my parents by raising my hand to slap an older person even if she did it first. Two wrongs don't make a right.
DeleteGOD bless you and your home Amstel
DeleteThe MIL and Bride are all wrong nothing more to say.If all parties involved can forgive each other and learn to respect each other then its fine but if they can't get past it then moving on is a great option.
ReplyDeleteDo you have a mother,are you married?wait till your wife/husband slaps your mother/father before you say this kati kati
DeleteDivorce her Asap
DeleteStella what do you mean by your statement on feminist? I’ll love to hear your opinion before I conclude on my judgment
Deletethe girl was soooo wrong and bags the blame. i am a woman and yes we deserve equal rights. but where your right just ended is the begining of someone else. does she not know the mother inlaw before the wedding? did her parents asked her to fight for food on their behalf? cant an elderly person slapp her even when she was right? retaliating in such manner means she can do anything even fighting her husband, does she not know that self control is needed more by her than her mil for peace to reign. if you are woman and you are supporting the girl, please tell God to reset your brain
DeleteDead on arrival. Will do same if I were the guy
ReplyDeleteThe marriage ended when they started cooking separately for reception. Why will a bride have her own caterer and the groom his? What sort of disunity is that?
DeleteAmanda, I don't think they cooked separately. The Lady reserved some food for her parents...at least, thaz what I got from this write up.
DeleteThe MIL was wrong to have slapped the DIL...why not leave the food when she refused? She shld have been the bigger person. The bride must hve ahad a reason for reserving the food for her parents. Probably, they have not had chance to eat all through the ceremony.
But the bride na wa oooo...why slap your MIL, even if she slapped you first? Had it been she was able to hold herself from slapping back, she would have had the upper hand in that family. The MIL would have forever been remorseful for what she did and her husband would have just been tied to her apron strings (literally).
Last last, they go be all right. Settling them to make up is not the main issue here but how can the marriage work with such foundation? They will find it difficult to cohabit and love each other selflessly.
If divorce is what the man wants she should grant him rather han trying to mend it cos this might just be a certificate for him to keep a side piece or marry second wife sef.
During my wedding, food was excess and someone carried a cooler of rice to his house living me and hubby hungry after the wedding. And d guy later told us that he took d cooler Of rice to share to his own compound people. Food and drinks shouldn't be problem in any wedding. Focus on what's next.
Delete@ Mhiz A, the one I read on twitter said they cooked differently oh. Anyways, na them sabi, that marriage was dead on arrival
DeleteSome Yorubas cook separately for their guests especially when you have large families on both sides. I guess it's done that way so the food will go around and you will be sure your own people get fed. I've seen weddings like that.
DeleteIn this case, all I can sense is that there's bad blood between the two of them. I'm sure they don't get along well before now cos e no reach to slap. Highest, she should have talked to her son to get her the food if the wife refused.
The lady too, nawa! How will you raise your hand against an elderly person. No fear. God help women of this age.
I no even chop on my wedding.
DeleteNo matter what d mother inlaw did.she should never raise her hands to hit her,never ever...she is older than her and her son’s mother.nothing can ever justify her slapping her mother inlaw back... d mother inlaw must av felt bad her daughter inlaw refuses her such a trivial thing like food and went ahead to challenge her when she returned d food thereby causing d confrontation...please you all should sit down in one minute and replay this all over. D mother inlaw shouldn’t av hit her but I’m sure she felt insulted by her daughter inlaw n hence d anger...
DeleteThe bride taking the food and pouring it back into the cooler is just as disrespectful as slapping her mum in-law. The bride isn't fit to be married to any sane man. So I'm glad the man is divorcing her. I'm a lady btw.
DeleteAmanda Favour, it is even best if they cook separately, I am talking from experience.
DeleteAnon 1:43, you are one of the few people that commented with sense on this issue.
DeleteOthers were just ranting like the MIL came from no where and slapped her. Ignoring the fact that she grabbed the plate from her and pour the food away.
If my younger brother try that nonsense with me it's hot slap straight with a hot knock on the head to finalise the situation let alone a daughter-in-law no different from a daughter.
Can you snatch a plate from your mum all of you shouting here haba be honest.
They all started saying she is not her daughter so she shouldn't have slapped her but when it comes to situation that doesn't favour them they will say the MIL doesn't see them as her daughter. They want the pampering of a daughter but not the scolding please pick a struggle.
A marriage that was never meant to be... too bad they wasted all that money to hold the wedding party...
ReplyDeleteTabby wen do women not feel pressured. Wedding day pressure, marriage itself pressure, pregnancy pressure, no pregnancy pressure.. Una just like pity party sha
DeleteIt is men that doesn't feel pressure. Toasting a woman pressure, enduring her shakara and rejection pressure, hustling to provide a woman pressure, using your energy to satisfy her on bed pressure, ensuring that your sperm is fertile and refill it pressure. You women should shut the fuck up for once. Walk in my shoe for a day. Pregnancy is a greater pain but not as painful as getting kicked na akpa amu....
DeleteSmh! She could have just applied wisdom and save her new home . Dumb arrogant bride.. mcheew
ReplyDeleteDon't mind her. Your mother In law slapped you and you slapped her back? What happened to walking away? For a woman to be old enough to be able to give birth to your husband, then she can as well be your mother....when dey ask dem to wait small collect home training, dem go refuse.
DeleteSmfh..
DeleteSo a mother in law has the right to slap somebody, just cos they are married to their son? Like the son is doing the woman a favour by marrying her. If it was the husband that slapped the woman's mom..his whole family would have joined to beat her. They both were wrong. The woman said no..No means no. The mother in law had no right taking that food by force. She could have asked her why she said NoNo after the ceremony.They should divorce
I do not support the bride's reaction but there is usually this pressure brides feel on their wedding day and mama should have understood and let the bride be and let the bride's mother know instead of arguing to the extent of slapping her.
DeleteBest thing is for them is to go their separate ways and both of them should learn patience.
I once went for a wedding in Lagos from Ado Ekiti and i wasn't served even water not to talk of food. I din't see it as a big deal as the food had finished. The bride was my friend and I was just happy to be a part of her day.The people that caused the fight would have asked mama not to worry since food had finished. And mama should have removed her eyes from her in-law's food too.
Nonsense comment. Only in Africa. That mother in law will be charged for assault in reasoning environments. You people should continue to wallow is backwardness
DeleteAnon 20:33
DeleteYou get sense. This is why Nigeria will NEVER move forward.
Who gave that woman the right to strike the bride?
Who she be?
Over rice? And “some guests?”
Why didn’t she talk to the bride’s parents to ask if it was okay to take their food?
Between the bride’s parents and “the important guests” who had the upper hand in that ceremony and all of their lives?
Goes to show, that this woman had no atom of respect for the lady in question and worse still her parents.
No in marriage, respect MUST be reciprocated, if you treat my family like trash, then it’s a DONE deal. Take your useless marriage and keep it moving. Bloody hell!
Really?, The same person that gave her the right to snatch the plate from her MIL is the same person that gave the woman the right to slap her. So pretending like you all didn't see what the bride did there. The bride is mannerless and deserves that slap.
DeleteExcept you are used to doing the same to your mum then fine, but if no then stop being hypocritical.
I saw this story somewhere. It is just painful.
ReplyDeleteDid both of them not go for counseling before marriage.
It is a pity and shame to the lady. She had anger issues and now she brought disgrace. Just a pity.
I am sure she spent more that is why the annoyance.
She no try at all
The demons of the bride family are really strong,they dont want her married!!! How can food cause the bride her marriage? This is something that can be sorted easily and more so whosoever is the guest is entitled to food and drinks no matter how little.
DeleteThe bible says wisdom is profitable to direct. God help her
Tiwa
He should forgive and stay married. It doesn't mean his wife is bad. She was just not herself. If you follow the way some people are on their wedding day, no friendship will continue after. The mother did wrong to slap her and it's intuition to slap back when slapped. If the girl didn't save the food what would mom have done. Take your guests home and feed them. The food has finished. What's there
ReplyDeleteVery level headed insight. Even go order food from a local restaurant if you must. This shituation did not have to escalate to the point of slapping and what not. If the MIL knew these ppl were coming and they were travelling so far, why did she not set aside their food and drink? I have attended a village wedding where I did not get one morsel to eat because the ppl were hoarding the food for who they know. I was related to the bride and we had travelled from far too, but the wedding took place at the groom's place and his ppl treated us with complete indifference. The only person who got a real meal was my grandmother. We accepted the bad face they showed us for what is was and gave our gifts and wished her well. A few years later the man died and I heard his children showed her hell, chased her away from the place, I think even beat her and she had to pack up and leave. I wasn't surprised they treated her so poorly, considering how they treated us at the wedding.
Deleteforgiveness would have been advised if marriage was an individual thing but 98% of the time you are married to the Family. so is it not best she had composed herself.
DeleteSlapping the mother in law already means she is bond to have issues with the husbands family members and any future misbehavior of the husband is bond to be supported by the Family...
In the Bible, Jesus says he did is forgiven much loves much. If MIL and hunny genuinely forgive her and she herself turns a new leaf, the marriage can be the best marriage. It's not irreparable. Nobody died
DeleteThey were both wrong. She was rude, and there is obviously no love lost between the wife and the mother in law, for things to escalate to the slapping stage. The mother in law has no right whatsoever to slap the bride. For the girl to return the slap is worrisome. Does it mean if her mom should slap her, she will slap her own back. She should not have slapped back. I dont want to be in the groom's position. They did not even slap themselves in private, they had to make it a show for ALL.
ReplyDeleteSame thought in my mind, would she have slapped her back if it were her mother?
DeleteThe mother has no right whatsoever to slap her.
And it's so bad of her slapping the MIL back.
They should do whatever gives them peace rather than put that in mind and be punishing each other at home or before we hear someone killed someone cos of this.
wow so wrong slapping an elderly person.
ReplyDeleteWHY dint the mother inlaw ask the girls parents? Like mother to mother rather than asking the daughter. And you mean the daughter could not even share the food.
DeleteShe now even slapped the woman on top... speechless
Push up, what if the girl's parents weren't close by at the time this took place?
DeleteThe food was probably closed to where the bride was! I don't see anything wrong with the mother in-law asking the bride.
DeleteBride sounds like the controlling one. She should go back to her parents home and work on her anger.
Indeed. So it's right to slap a younger person. May you be slapped like that always..
DeleteThe Bride should not have poured the food back into the cooler .
ReplyDeleteMay GOD see them through
I suspect there may have been bad blood between the two women
Probably something had gone wrong prior to this slapping scenario... I'm not on anyone sides but patience is key
DeleteSomething gone wrong & the mother in-law went to beg her for the food? I nah I don't think so that lady is just a Jezebel that's all
DeleteShe went too far slapping the mother inlaw, what is in the food sef.
ReplyDeleteWhoever wrote this story read it somewhere and decided to send it here. You can't apply for divorce of a two day old marriage. The law doesn't allow that. Except you file for an affidavit of urgency and there are even grounds under which that can be granted. So Mr story teller, this your story has k leg
ReplyDeleteWow...abeg lets all be sincere. The bride was very wrong in refusing her mil from taking from the food and also slapping her back.
ReplyDeleteThe mil took the bride as her daughter and slapped some sense into her for being rude I.e throwing the food back into the cooler. Im sure she would have slapped her own child if they had done so.
The bride didn't take the woman as her mom. She would never have slapped her mom over anything talk less of food.
Well they should divorce in peace. Kudos to the man for acting mature in public.
Many men would have beaten their wives there and then.
Gbam! 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾
DeleteAfricans...took her like her daughter, is she her daughter? What right has she to assume she can take her as her daughter? Nigerians and elders, yet we are known as one of the most disrespectful and rude people in the world. We respect just a particular group of people, we don't know what general respect is. That's the only reason the mother in law felt entitled to slap that girl. Girl shouldn't have poured the food back, nor slapped her back though.
DeleteI don't support what the bride did but no MIL has the right to slap or hit her DIL because she sees her as her child.
DeleteCan the groom's FIL slap him because he sees him as his son? We are talking about an adult here biko let's stop being unnecessarily sentimental.
SDK analysts!!!! My question: would a mother slap her daughter on her wedding day?? Or she would treat her like a princess??? Both of them behaved wrongly.... The wife shouldn’t have refused her food and the mother inlaw shouldn’t have gone to collect the food... She should have waited for another day to deal with her new wife!!!
DeleteWomen should learn to show love to each other regardless of whether she’s your daughter or mother. Xxbarbiexx
Best comment on this issue @ Bianca Bruno
DeleteImagine saying she took her as her daughter, are daughters or children meant to be beaten, and treated with disrespect? Africans always justifying aggression and violence. No wonder African parents can beat their kids so much, without being remorseful.African parents feels only the elderly must be respected. Respect is reciprocal.
DeleteAnonymous 17:55 spot on!!!!!!would a loving mother slap her daughter on her big day?patience is key...
DeleteThis why most Africans are rude and loud. Parents beating and slapping their children at will. Kids grow up behaving like parents the cycle continues. Oyibo don’t beat their kids yet they turn very respectful. They don’t shout when they talk. They apologise and respect people.
DeleteBianca thanks you are the only person that said the truth.
DeleteTaaaaa! Which oyibo kids turn out respectful???? They don't talk as loud as us yes but the kids are not more respectful than African kids abeggggiii.
DeleteOyibo kids are much more disrespectful than Nigerian kids o. Children that have been pampered all their lives
DeleteSlapping his mother for what na? The issue probably started during the preparation but the food incident triggered everything but that's no excuse. Can she slap her own mother? It's arrant nonsense.
ReplyDeleteI don't and won't advice divorce,for now he should just separate from her till he is calm enough and can look her in her face without the urge to punch her for her misbehaviour. It's difficult though, he should forgive and forget. That's the reason for the vow-for better or worse.
Every adult should learn to keep their hands to themselves. Maybe the bride's mother and father has never slapped her once in her entire life, and all of a sudden this woman slaps her and publicly too. The MIL was completely out of line, you don't hit another woman's child, now after receiving slap back she'll learn to keep her hands to herself.
DeleteIt's better they divorce...The guy will not forgive her oo,if it's your mum your wife or nrithera wife slapped, how una go take am?
DeleteAnon 15:47, GBAM!!! Next time, she’ll think twice before slapping anybody whether or not they’re married to her son.
DeleteVery true. Adults keep your hands to yourselves. Don't go on a slapping spree and expect not to be slapped back. Self control still.
DeleteImagine slapping your mother in law on your wedding day? many people will come here and start defending her.yes,the mother in law shouldn't have slapped her,but she did and she in turn should have shown she's from a good home and walked away,trust me if she did,her husband would be the one fighting his mother on her behalf but no she's educated, she's probably a feminist and she has the right to defend herself. Madam wifey please pack your load and waka joooor.stupid wife.omo ale jatijati,alaileko.
ReplyDeleteChai,this story haff reach here.saw this story on Twitter,some said is on Facebook also.Infact it was a topic on Sli at Inspiration Fm yesterday night.
ReplyDeleteAnd you wasted today’s chronicle space with this yeye story that I have read every where, the narrative has been viral for the past two weeks, what made you think we have not read it too? e be like your box don dry abi? Smh.
ReplyDeleteYou can jump and pass...Ewu. You mustn't run it down because you have seen it before. Learn some decorum. She has right to post anything on her blog.
DeleteWhich one is "awon feminists"? Is it because you live in a country were female rights are recongnised? If you are not a feminist good for you. I am a proud feminist.
ReplyDeleteTo the story, I am a kind of person that things like that won't disturb. I mean if you want food collect, even her parents won't mind because a small portion from the cooler is taken. She shouldn't have refused, for the woman to tell her first shows respect. The lady was just rude. Anyway, if divorce will make him feel better then please he should go for it. Marriage is not a do or die affair.
you said it all, for the mother in-law to beg her & seek permission first shows she has respect for the girl, the girl is just a fool.
DeleteBoth of them were wrong,but we don't know what pushed mother in law to slap the bride. That said, if my sister in law slap my mother, my brother better not bring her to the family cos yes she is marrying him, but he got a family before he met her.
DeleteYes o. Unless the man is omo-ale
DeleteThe bride is so uncultured, she's rude to have slapped her mother in-law, but ders a place of forgiveness, the guy shld give d wife another chance and dats if she's repentant. Good luck to them.
ReplyDeleteYou can't slap my mother and still be my wife. Those of you saying he should take her back, wait until your SIL slap your mothers then come and give us your opinion.
DeleteThe wife is wicked, what's there to give your In-laws just some food haba is here wedding day.. instead of her to be celebrating her stupid eyes dey food, see the way she Open Eyes korokoro and allow Devil to use her...the mother in-law still went to take food by herself but the Demon in her now manifest, iyawo jezebel let the husband Divorce her...who will marry this kind person nonsence...
ReplyDeleteIf they go ahead with the marriage,it will not work ,unless the husband and wife relocate and stay away from family for years;they can even invite the Mama abroad for some months,so people can see that the 3 of them have co-habited and so others can shut up.. if not,the family of the husband will forever be referring to it and the mother of the groom will never be allowed to forget. I know of a marriage that ended 3 years after the wife insulted(not even touched)the mother-in -law. The woman kept on reminding her son until it led to divorce---even after much begging!
DeleteIt appeared like 'edi' something like bondage or bad luck--starting from the guests that came late. May God help the lady o!
Thank you feyifunmi. They should wait until their own mothers are beaten up first.
DeleteThere is no Feminism in this matter rara
ReplyDeleteI doubt the Marriage was consummated
LORD have mercy.
Jus what? I don't think anybody would take that. I mean, the bride doesn't even have shame at all. Not even a kobo shame.....
ReplyDeletechim-oma aka Miss Kapusu
This is just poverty. Your parents foods are with you on your wedding day? Hia. On my day I didn't even remember where myself was let alone food. Where were your parents that they didn't keep the food themselves or your siblings? So the food finished down that there was none left? Hia.....Ain't there supposed to be left overs from weddings? This story get K LEG. There are more to this story.
ReplyDeletePoverty stricken mind!
DeleteAlways beware of people who are stingin with food and water.
"Stingin", anonymous sic and Eka Joy, please come and carry ms A.
DeleteThe bride was wrong
ReplyDeleteThe girl went too far abeg, but the mother in-law over reacted to have slapped her, such gods to even return the food back to the cooler that's too much Abeg,let the marriage end already,lie lie ill mannered feminist
ReplyDeleteI will blame the mother in-law, as she ought to behave maturely. Most everyone eat at wedding reception? The guy in question need to grow up and need wisdom to sort things out.
ReplyDeleteI want to believe you are a male and also still have a mother.
DeleteWhen something like this happen to you, don't forget to come back and read this your comment.
Your comment doesn't make any sense.
And to your question, yes, everyone is supposed to eat at a wedding reception, except they decline.
I will end it immediately.That is a very very toxic and violent wife he just married.God knows what she will do if they eventually continue with the marriage and the man offends her one day,maybe stab him?
ReplyDeleteand his mother is very gentle and non-violent?
DeleteSlap your mother inlaw back cos of food?the mother inlaw was very wrong to have slapped her first but the wife made it worse by slapping her back...haaa abomination of the highest order o.Theres isnt a better time to say bye bye to such marriage than two days later.
ReplyDeleteThe guest came to grace their wedding, would the wife be happy that they left without eating
ReplyDeleteThey can prepare more food for her parents. The mother in law came to the bride herself yet the bride didn't give the food. The bride doesn't have respect at all. And it's her wedding. She also has anger issue. if the groom is my son, let him divorce her asap. she wouldn't welcome me or any member of the grooms family and if she can fight in public, it will be worse in the house. In fact, the groom should have left her at the reception, then divorce her. Rubbish
No home training,. For food only.
My dear, the bride is the type that will make her in-laws go hungry when they visit and lock the kitchen after serving breakfast...
DeleteShe should go and work on her anger.
Yes, the mother in-law was wrong slapping her but she also lack self control and asked for that slap.
In every action, there is a reaction.
The bride is so wrong and rude...
Deletesomething similar happened in a wedding I attended, the MIL, was leaving the reception ground and ask someone to use the son car to drop her, the bride refused,saying the guy will not touch her husband car, even after knowing MIL was inside the car already, she collected the car keys, u need to see the insult she received that day from everyone... MIL almost slapped her too and was calling stupid and so on... Some people are so rude abeg..she should go and marry her food.
This case is a pour scene of "When your village people will not let you marry".
ReplyDeleteThe lady is back to square one. Marriage hunting reactivated.
It's a super story...
Deleteif you are able to slap anyone, be ready to recieve a slap as well.....this is what happens when agbero jam agbero
ReplyDeletethat you are an inlaw to the bride doesnt make you more important than the bride's family.
Thank you!!!
DeleteBoth of them were wrong.
ReplyDeleteIf na me be the bride, I will not slap back, I will 'TELL' not ask my parents that I took a little food saved for them to serve the couple.
Now if na me be the mother in-law, I no for slap the bride, that's just gross misconduct, she no be em mama, she has no right what so ever to raise her finger on her.
If na me be the husband ni, and this just happened. No need, party is over. The man will never forget in his lifetime
In Igboland you Neva hear say one person no dey train pikin so even if someone spank you for doing doing, learn from it. The girl has anger issue or not happy with what or how her MIL handled things.
DeleteBut the mother in law have no anger issues? Oh I forgot, she is an elder. Africans are too much. People will be hiding behind being an "elder" and be feeling entitled. This is a lesson to her. If u don't wanna get slapped, slap nobody...
DeleteLike, she actually poured the food back into the cooler!
ReplyDeleteI always say that women who are selfish with food can do an undo when they get married.
It's food for Christ sake, your guests should be attended to and carter for first before your immediate family members. The bride is a very selfish lady, she is the kind that will count the piece of meat on her in-laws plate and dish enough assorted for her family. Some people like her even go as far as counting the number of meats on their spouses plates.
She slapped her mother in-law back, let's assumed she was under tension at the time, but, why didn't she apologized immediately....
The groom has every right to seek for annulment or whatsoever. He saw another bad side of her that will cause a disaster in the nearest future.
They should both go their separate ways.
Spiritual poverty will continue to destroy a lot of people's lives.
Feminist shit my foot.
If you check well, the bride will be a fat lady. Fat people like food die. I have seen lots of them.
DeleteThis one is yeye feminism
Mrs A you always rant for no reason. You will even do worse than the bride in question because you exhibit that attitude a lot on this blog.
DeleteBesides, what has this story got to do with feminism? Olodo how about goggling what feminism is and stick to the real story up there.
Thanks for your comment, I thought I was the only one that noticed. Empty barrels make the most noise. Go to her house or check her background and you will find that she is and has absolutely nothing including brains.
Deletefor her to refuse her mother in law a favour like that then there is a problem. Even if the guy forgives, that Marriage will not last. A seed of discord has been planted already.
ReplyDeleteI honestly hate those weddings where food is so tight that not even a grain of rice can be found after everyone has eaten. This story sounds so bizarre, which bride has food guarding on their wedding day, isn't it someone who takes care of such? What kind of barebones wedding is this that the only food left over was the one food the bride set aside for her parents, was their nobody on the groom's side who set aside food? If the bride's parents were in attendance then the food should have been shared. If they were not in attendance or the food was intended for a sick and frail grandparent who could not make it to the wedding then the groom's mother should have made other arrangements, even up to ordering food from outside. Where I am from we tend to prepare large excesses of food. We will scrimp on the decorations and other things to make sure that food and drinks are in over abundance. People eat until they can't walk.
ReplyDeleteThe mother was wrong for slapping a grown woman on her wedding day and publicly for that matter. The bride slapped her right back, may have been reflex at protecting her person. I cannot say how I would react if someone slapped me publicly, I am not one to lay my hands on ppl, so I do not want anyone to lay their hands on me, no matter who it is. The matter could have been resolved much better and even if you are doing a village affair you can plan appropriately if you know there are confirmed long distance attendees who are to come by setting aside their portion of food and drink as well as their souvenirs.
My dear hunger full this country . . . .
DeleteAnonymous you have spoken well right from the beginning to the end. Everyone shouting she shouldn't have slapped back, wait until you've worn the exact shooe and then come back. Personally, I wouldn't have slapped back but that it will take the heavens to be on a good term with his mother again. Like I said I would have retaliated but I can't be very sure though.
DeleteThe wife is at fault here.
ReplyDeleteI mean, how can you be dragging for food on your wedding day?
What happens to giving them a little out of the one you kept for your parents.
This is what longer throat can cause. Value food too much.
SMH. So nobody sees anything wrong with a mother in law that choose to slap her daughter in law in public, on her wedding day? Would the issue of slapping back even come up if she did not slap her in the first place. What do you think that type of mother in law will do in the privacy of the brides home? Maybe beat her up because she is older and her husband's mum and she is not allowed to do anything about it?
ReplyDeleteWe do not know the whole story because I doubt this is just about the food and of course the story will be told in such a way that makes the younger one look bad but she should count her blessings and move on if the man is divorcing her because that, cos that attitude means he condones the mum beating her up and she not doing anything about it.
I will not slap back but I will not ignore such action because it set precedence for other things, we Nigerians can like to misinterpret respect. The older person is always right.
Thank you o. For those saying the MIL saw the bride as a daughter, the simple question is that do you think the woman would have slapped her son for denying her something? Do we know why the bride refused? What if her parents are hypersensitive patients who cannot afford to miss their medication. That she is a bride does not make her a 2nd class citizen. And as you have said, this would have marked the beginning of domestic violence from the MIL. It surely would have continued.
DeleteStella this has nothing to do with feminism.... What transpired between grown women cannot be tied to feminism..
ReplyDeleteI won't say she slapped her mil. I'll say she slapped her back. Two very different bthings. I've never ever slapped anyone. I'm not violent. But I can bet my life savings if my mil slaps me, I'll return the slap without thinking. Instinct mehn.
ReplyDeleteHmmmm,so if your brothers wife slapped your mother I am sure you will be cool with that too
DeleteAnonymous21:50, if my mum decides to go and be slapping someone's daughter, then she should be ready to bear the consequences.
DeleteSo every girl that misbehaves is automatically a feminist? Ok o
ReplyDeleteThey day we begin to understand how feminists have helped our gender in terms of better pay in the office, female education, eradication of FGM etc.
Feminists are to Nigeria what MLK is to the black race
In the court of the law, the grooms mother is wrong, she hit her first so the wife reacted in self defense: justified
In the court of public opinion, tradition and church, The bride is very very wrong. Would she slap her own mother?
The marriage should just be annulled.they cant live this scandal down.
Two of them are wrong, the mother in law being an elder should have taken the high road and not slap her. Did slapping her make the people eat the food? This is not a case of feminism, it's a case of arrogance and stupidity. How can one slap his or her mother inlaw? Some people are really terrible. If divorce will give the man peace of mind then he should go for it.
ReplyDelete👍
DeleteThe bride lacks home training and sure comes from a hungry home.
ReplyDeleteThe mother in law also lacks home training. No means no, no matter what?
DeleteYou're welcome bride!
DeleteSo this story is real? My goodness. I blame the DIL, shebi na her parents food she wan reserve? Her parents will understand her than inlaws. Wisdom is profitable here. Like Stella, I wish them a happy divorce.
ReplyDeleteThere’s always a lot of demons strolling upadan on every wedding day,from both families arguing about seats,to food,to sister inlaws feeling superior or inferior,etc etc but with proper wisdom,everything may turn out fine.
ReplyDeleteI tell you anon, so so true. My youngest brother in law nearly fought with one of my male distant cousin on the day of my traditional marriage,just because of palmwine 😁😀😁😀LMAO
DeleteCouples should pray fervently before their D-day
A lot of marriages develop k leg from the wedding day.people don’t realize that there are several evil spirits lurking around that day so if you as the bride allows the devil to use you to destroy your marriage that may last till you grow old and die with 5 minutes of stupidity,na you know o.
ReplyDeleteLike what Jane Fonda said to Jennifer Lopez in Monster in Law, you can't slap someone and say sorry; you should expect your own hot slap from the person.
ReplyDeleteNow, both mother in law and bride are at fault here; no respect for the bride vice versa.
The groom is also hasty in his decision; he should settle it amicably by allowing the bride apologise to the mother, and making sure his mom promise never to slap his wife again.
I don't see any reason for divorce here.
What of his mum apologising to his wife?
DeleteFor this to have happened, that means there would have been a lot of bad blood between the bride and the MIL long before the wedding.
ReplyDeleteThey should be allowed to divorce in peace.
Same question I asked after reading this chronicle. What was the food doing near her in the first place?
ReplyDeleteShe is a very stupid bride and deserves to be alone for life,why was she fighting for food on her wedding day. Even if her mother In-law slapped her slapped her, she then had the guts to slap her. Is that woman not her mothers age. Why did she leave her throne as a princess to go snatch foor from the woman whose son she is marrying. How dare her! Divorce straight, she has no manners and is poorly trained. Nne you are a man and you should remain single. The lady is a bastard.
ReplyDeleteShe village people has sworn to Disgraced her in public,even when the Mil came begging her for food they still close her ear or eyes for the shame and disgrace to come to pass.
ReplyDeleteIssa pity bride
Common sense or using your no 7 on your day but you let food to Disgrace you publicly..
Sorry bride.
a marriage has to be at least 2 years before you can file for divorce...fishy sensational story.
ReplyDeleteAnyways let’s assume part of it is true, the mother in law erred cos she could have told the couple the food is finished and they will understand, the girl probably over reacted out of stress and all the advice from the ‘don’t let them ride you’ gang.
The guy is not man enough, instead of finding a way to appease his mum and caution his wife he wasn’t a divorce...Goodluck to them all
2 years where pls say what you know o
DeleteI am a lawyer, and I’m telling you, you cannot file for divorce for a marriage that is less than 2 years.
DeleteThe condition for divorce in Nigeria is that the marriage has broken down irretrievably under different conditions, for the court to assume that the marriage must be at least two years to come under any of the heads.
I can’t teach you family law on Stella’s blog but go do your research
In what country is that o?you can divorce a day after your wedding if you don’t have any minor together if the divorce is not contested but if there’s a minor,you may have to be separated first and that’s even if the grounds for divorce is not adultery.Go back to law school oga/madam.
DeleteThe lawyer is right. I am also a lawyer and there are pre-conditions to initiating a divorce in Nigeria. The 2 year rule is one of it. I presume you are not a lawyer; let the lawyers advise.
Delete@ 19.14,please hide when lawyers are talking, what do you know? Arguing ignorantly , olodo.
DeleteThe lady lacks self control, respect coupled with anger issues and stubbornness. On your wedding day, she were so concerned about food?
ReplyDeleteRespect - If she has no respect and regard for the mother in law , she would have obliged her and listen to her when she respected her personalty by asking her permission to take some portion of the food meant for her parents. She didn't just take the food without her knowledge but whispered to her and pleaded. Her parents are not guests or strangers that would not understand if they didn't eat much in that wedding because they are part of the joy. I understand she have to take care of her parents but she was unnecessarily stubborn.
Self -control - Snatching the plate of food from your mother in law in the presence of guests is embarrassing and shameful. Who does that? Will she do that to her sister not even her mother? That's totally wrong and disrespectful.
Although the woman shouldn't have slapped her but it was out of shock ( not justifying her thou).
Anger- then boom, she returned the slap back as if both of them are in the wrestling box. What stops her from controlling her temper then later iron it out with her husband instead of showing unruly behaviour in public.Totally, wrong.
A woman that can raise her hand and slap her mother in law on her wedding day in public is not a wife material. The couple should be separated for now but not divorce so she can cool down and talk to herself. I like the guy because his kind fits that lady.
The lady's action is disrespectful and abominable. Its wrong and wrong.
Thanks for the analysis on the bride. Why didn’t you analyse the MIL same way. There is no way you cant do that without contradicting yourself right. That is why what is wrong is wrong no matter who does it.
DeleteSo if your mother slaps you, you would slap back. Lol try this and see what will befall you be talking rubbish. Agbero jam agbero indeed. All you women lacking home training be talking rubbish up and down.
ReplyDeleteNot every parent slaps their child. My mother has never slapped me because she felt there was something dehumanizing about putting her hand in my face. She has also never used a shoe or a broom to hit me because she has never thought to treat her child like ppl treat dogs. I have never as an adult thought it was my place to hit another person. People should learn to keep their hands to themselves no matter who you are to that person. If the husband had slapped the wife publicly everybody would cry out domestic violence, but if another woman does it then it is ok. All abuse is abuse! All violence is violence!
DeleteAnon 17.43....oya chop kisses
DeleteIn a nutshell...
ReplyDeleteHere comes the bride with pride.
Her mood changed because of food.
She snapped & slapped back.
A gloomy future with the groom looms.
And preparation for their separation is in motion.
End times...
oh what a poem!!
DeleteAll this over food being served from a cooler?! A common cooler! Are there no chafing dishes in Nigeria?!
ReplyDeleteLol... 😀😁 Another angle
DeleteThe wife is terrible ohhhhh. Not allowing her mother in-law to take food on her wedding day. and slapping her back. she will do worse things ohhhh
ReplyDeleteThe mother in law is wrong in slapping her. I know she was annoyed but well it has happened
DeleteNext time tie your hands with chains to stop slapping
The bride overreacted abeg, i will do same if i was the groom, divorced her straight.
ReplyDeleteThis has got nothing to do with Anybody being a feminist.
ReplyDeleteThe mother in law was wrong in slapping her, same as the new wife was also wrong in taking back the food & returning the slap. This marriage is indeed dead on arrival. They should dissolve it & go their separate ways.
The way people hoard food or gifts in wedding parties is absolutely irritating.
Well then if the couple truly love each other & think they can forget this incidence then they can give it a try.
The bride get mind sha.
ReplyDeleteAfter careful consideration. I blame not the MIL nor the DIL but rather POVERTY.
ReplyDeleteBecause of food... Na wa ooh. The bride lack home training,she is very wrong for slapping her mother in law. Abeg the husband should divorce her.
ReplyDeleteSomething definitely is wrong somewhere . I suspect that the MIL and DIL don't get along.
ReplyDeleteTo be honest, if I was the one that was slapped I would have slapped the person back. It's REFLEX!
Once i read that the groom applied for divorce and the case is on going i knew this story is fake. In nigeria you cant divorce until after two years of marriage. Ask any lawyer. Another nollywood story.
ReplyDeleteBut the marriage hs not been consummated so they can file for annulment
DeleteWhy did the MIL slap her?
ReplyDelete1) MIL didn't respect bride's no and took the food after bride said no
ReplyDelete2) Bride felt angry and disrespected and poured the food she reserved for her parent back
3) MIL slaps bride for reason best known to her. I don't get why you will slap a bride on her wedding day in public
4) Bride for whatever reasons best known to her returns slap.
My take is that somebody should have acted maturely from the beginning. MIL should have respected bride's no or bride should have allowed MIL have her way when she took the food without permission.
Thank you. The MIL should have handled this is a more mature manner. Why would she even want to take the bride's parents' food to give to HER guests? She should have made arrangements for her late comer guests.
DeleteThank you,Olivia Silk. It is upsetting that instead of some people to take 6 minutes to read and understand feminism,they want to taint it and make it sound like a crime
ReplyDeleteSaw the post on OMAM and some people supported the bride..... This is still Nigeria and we should respect our mother in law like our mothers..... Would she have slap her mother if she did same thing.
ReplyDeleteomo alaileko. ...
Both lack respect for each other. Arguments could be made for and against both women based on age, maturity, culture, etc.. Wife was insensitive and discourteous to refuse MIL's request to serve late guests. Mil was condescending to ignore wife's wishes instead going ahead to scoop her parent's food. Both were totally wrong to slap each other. If it were abroad, MIL will be arrested for assault. You don't lay your hands on anyone no matter who you are or how offended you are. But since we're in Naija not abroad, wife will have to suffer the consequences of her actions because MILs are next to gods here. People ought to learn how to love and respect one another.
ReplyDeleteYou will have to be separated for two years before filing for divorce, it will have to be established. The marriage has not been consummated (i guess except they did it on Traditional) so he can seek for annulment .
ReplyDeleteAdults should learn to keep their hands to themselves whether you are an elder or a youngie.
Question of the day, if the mother-in-law slapped the bride and she didn't retaliate , should she divorce her husband for having such an overbearing mother in law.
Wedding is actually for the bride and groom, it is time for both parents to understand that. Most parents control their children's wedding from the cloth they wear that day to the music and it ought not to be so. It is not your wedding, let the bride and groom decide how they want it.
Catering is for caterers and the person that paid the caterers calls the shots...simple.
The bride should have compromised but we ought to understand that most times NO means absolutely No, some people take their word as their bond and it may not be that she likes food so much or likes to hoard it. Mother-in-law should have understood grudgingly and make alternative arrangement for the guest. That is the importance of RSVP in occasions but some people will not RSVP and will come with their community. Why didn't the mother-in-law reserve her food for her guest? She ate her food to her satisfaction and came for the bride's parents food out of little respect for her in-law because obviously her son is doing the bride a favor by marrying her.
The bride was wrong retaliating but to be frank, if she kept quiet and continued with the marriage after that woman slapped her on the happiest day of her life in the presence of people, that mother-in-law would have done worse. The mother-in-law will continue to put eyes in whatever the bride owns and will try to take it using different excuses, she will rubbish that bride in the marriage. Mutual respect is important and should be established in marriage.
As women , we want to marry , we also have to recognize that we come from somewhere, we are not throw away that people should trample and maltreat because we are getting married. I think it is better they part ways because no one has the right to slap another persons daughter and no one has the right to slap someone's mother no matter what.
The bride should not have even snatched that food and poured it in the cooler but in this case, the mother-in-law as a mature person should have let go and immediately report to the son or the bride's parents.
Both of them lack foresight and more on the mother-in-law because she has grown up and she should understand that even your grown ups can be stubborn and yet you still love them.
My take is, the bride should have collected the slap like a GEE then right there, take the microphone , cancel the wedding right there and walk out with dignity. If the reverse was the case and the bride's mother slapped the groom, the groom and his people, and his ancestors will cancel the wedding immediately even the fault is from the groom.
KING XOXO MYSTERY
Best comment so far.
DeleteThere is no way I would have slapped back o but I swear the drama that would have ensued there... fainting things
ReplyDeleteStella, what has this got to do with Feminism? Please I like too much for this abeg.
ReplyDeleteOn the thing, all of them are very wrong. All of them. And I feel there was already bad blood between the mother in law and the wife.
She asks for food, wife says no. Mother in law should have gone to her son. The son (groom) should have been the one involved in all these.
See people always tell you let your in-laws do this, let your in-laws do that. Nobody be like your own pikin, nobody be like your own mother. Familiarity breeds disrespect and this also goes for in-laws.
A case of longer throat, poverty mentality people & desperation jam together.
ReplyDelete* why must the mother in law go to grab food already reserved for others & cut it or share it?
* why is the bride not tolerant / accomodating to understand the need of her wedding guests who travelled from far ?
* why did the MIL slap the bride? Another person's daughter?
* why r the guests not dignified enough to refuse food or stop the food request once they sense problem/ trouble stiring up because of their demand to eat food at the wedding?
It is because of scenarios like this I forbid myself & my kids to marry / relate with or share things with desperate, hungry, broke, greedy, poverty minded low lives.
Desperation & poverty mind can never allow u to behave dignified, let go, free urself & others from a disrespectful situation, drama, shame & such public disgrace!!!
I can’t stand it when that one gives her backward and unenlightened opinion under posts because the ones that do not have a mind of their own or any substantial education will make myopic comments which will turn the whole topic into a farce.
ReplyDeleteOne year later, so what has happened to the couple?
ReplyDelete