Hmmmm....
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
CROSSING THE FRIEND ZONE
He give priority to my opinions to his personal matters especially family and relationships while my priority on opinions in personal issues is my mum and elder sister. He graduated before me and worked my NYSC posting to his location.
The day I told him my guy proposed. He did not talk with me for days. When he finally did, he gave me 1001 reasons why I should say NO to that marriage proposal. So I said NO.
When the next person proposed, I did not tell him. By this time, we hardly see, we talk more on phone because my job is 8-6 and I work most Saturdays. On his part, he is living with his girl friend. I can still remember his reactions and exact words the day I told him he will join us home for my traditional marriage. He called my mum and my elder sister.
Told them he had a dream where my husband beat me to death. He digged my fiancee past and found out the guy was given birth out of wedlock which the guy did not tell me. He only told me his dad is late.
I went ahead and married him and the marriage crashed after two years. He also got married to his girl afterwards. Last month I needed someone to pour my heart to and called him. We booked appointment to meet in my house. I am staying alone. One thing led to another and we had s#x for the first time in our friendship.
Since then I have not been myself. It seems I am meeting this guy for the first time. He is all over me like never before. His wife is staying in another state while both of us stay in the same state. He is saying maybe destiny wants us together as husband and wife. I don't want to be the reason why another marriage crashed like mine. How do I get this guy off my emotions and life. I need to do that very fast.
*Stop attaching emotions to a one night stand..he will not leave his wife for you,stop day dreaming.He will gbensh you well well and leave you when its time to leave and he will cook up a very good reason.....
Just guide your money if you have any cos he might go there.....lol
From bestie bestie atagi...
ReplyDeleteIf you were destined to be together you would have married him initially biko ga iru..
Poster ure just a shameless she goat. Husband snatcher
Deletehahahahahaha Stella said guide your money. I hardly stand with Stella when it comes to most chronicles but I'm with her on this one. She is 100 percent correct.
DeletePoster, that guy will never marry you, I repeat will never leave his wife. No matter the depth of love you guys share, he will never leave his wife. The next stop is him telling you cock and bull stories about how his wife steals his money, how he needs money to sort out one or two projects, maybe build a house two of you will live in, lmao.....RUN. Put that sex behind you and RUN. dON'T WASTE YOUR TIME WITH THIS GUY.
You see as them tohtoh dey drip like water fountain for another woman's husband.
DeleteMadam, na you decide to have sex, he did not rape you.
Few men will see an open tohtoh and back off.
You alone will also decide to have a baby, cos you did not mention one and you
are likely to trap him with that. That one no go trap am o. E go backfire and make
you no strangulate any baby abeg.
That’s how people will be doing besty up and down and not check their feelings, when one person now gets married they will now become very angry and remember they have things to discuss, which always results in gbenshing, causing another family heart ache. Anything you want to do just do and leave us out of it but know that you will be causing another woman heart break
DeleteI wonder the advice you're expecting. Kill her and marry him? You can get away with murder in Nigeria
DeleteYou invited him to your house where you stay alone when you knew you were vulnerable....
DeleteFish brain!!! I hope you, at least, enjoyed the Fock
All the anonymous above me are married women, two of them live in different towns as their husband.
DeleteNobody should quote me biko
Hmmmm...he is married he is married. That is a zone you should not have emotions for.
ReplyDeleteso we're supposed to tell her how to get the gut out of her life oh, a married man! You need advise how to let go of emotions, mumu woman!
DeleteThat man must have fucked her more than 5times.
Friend turned side chick! Nkpi
Repeat after me, DUG not digged!!! May God in his infinite mercies judge you for what you’ve done. You’ve fucked him but you’re saying you don’t want to break someone’s marriage. You’re fucking evil! You both are! Tueh!
DeleteWhy is your brain so light?
ReplyDeleteDude is evil, he keeps his own gf n marries her while trying to sabotage urs,I won't be surprised if he has a hand in ur failed marriage, open ur damn eyes else you will grow old.
He has seen d free bed, and he will surely break it to pieces n move on without repairing it.
you are using him and he's using you. Congratulations! #prudestitute #menarecum
DeleteBlackBerry will not kill person. Your last paragraph cracked me up.😂😂😂😂😂
DeleteShes not using him...
DeleteHes using her worse than tissue!
she's using him to fill the void created by her ex. Do you think it's easy to be lonely. The oxytocin from cuddling is actually bae #prudestitute
Deleteplease run very fast. You need to sort your self out first.
ReplyDeleteAfter nacking you want to get him out fast. Na wa for women.
ReplyDeleteNothing to say
Flee from Adultery poster. Flee i say
ReplyDelete“One thing led to another...” this sentence makes me laugh so hard. If you won’t give us the details then no need for that sentence and simply say, “we had sex”.
ReplyDeleteMadam, you have given this guy control of your life. You let go of a suitor the first time and then went into marriage without your heart in it reason it was so easy for it to crash because you went into it with negative thoughts.
That guy is a demon and you should flee from him but would you hear? This one you are inviting a married man to your house to have a heart to heart, what happened to texting and calls? Don’t you have family and friends why must it be this guy?
Enjoy the sex while it lasts but know that he doesn’t love you and you are the loser in this equation, he’d tell you all the things you want to hear and go back to his wife. Next time before you accept any proposal, you’d do it because you’re ready and love the person. Maybe it’s that first guy you jilted that made your marriage crash, you probably left a good man because some inconsequential guy told you to probably because you liked him and assumed he’d do good by you but unfortunately he wants you for his personal pleasure and you fell for it at a time when you should act wiser.
Hard luck, use your head and not your pussy/heart to think next time.
"one thing led to another"... is another self denying line, like the sex wasnt planned or u didnt see it coming... check well now, you'd notice she picked out special bra & panties to wear for that visit.
DeletePls try and keep away from him but I hope he doesn't blackmail you or threaten to tell your husband about the sex issue. God help yoy
DeleteOxygen oooo 😂😂😂😂😂
DeleteLmao. Doppel and oxygen, una doh o
DeleteOxygen lol
DeleteWicked woman. Onye oshi amu!!
ReplyDeleteWhy did you invite a married man to your house in the first place?
You won tie goat and yam together?? Stop taking his calls, any day he visit your house for any reason nwere nmiri oku ruo ya ka ube!! Stay away from someones property.
Why is she a wicked woman,
DeleteThe man is the wicked one..
No wonder anonymous always call you amu or whatever.. Dunddieeeeee
Fan Emmanuel is so stupeeeeeed...
DeleteCalling her fellow woman onye oshi amu..on top man matter...
I be Yoruba but I understand that curse...
Na you be the real amu
HHAHAHAHAHA real onye oshi amu. Ezu go mu amu mmadu before oooo but I have repented. Poster please stop this now it's too early, unless you want to learn the hard way. Next thing he will get you pregnant and convince you to remove it.
Delete@Ceiling FAN
DeleteI sabi say you no fit write one sentence wey you no go carry amu put?
Anyway, I understand FAN here. Na woman plot this coup for her house.
Na she decide say fork go happen, the man no rape am
Very few men go see open tohtoh leave am commot.
But FAN, make you go carry hot water pour for one woman like dat
come spend ya life for kirikiri.
Make up your mind to forget what happened and put him in his place. You will end up regretting everything if you don't stop cos he won't leave his wife for you. Just know that!
ReplyDeleteSin is so sweet. It clouds your open heaven n leads to destruction. What you might loose bc of sin is far more than the excitement it gives. Flee from sin.
ReplyDelete1000 likes
Delete1 Trillion likes. If only we knew that sin is a fight against our destiny. Keep yourself pure, (especially from fornication which is man's main weakness) and there are some prayers you won't even need to pray.
DeleteTake Stella's advice
ReplyDeleteEnd of discussion
Your vulnerable, he knows, he'll use you........at least now you know
i do not have an opinion on this so i will read comments.
ReplyDeletei am curious though as to why he did not make his feelings clear before you got married. why he was bent on digging up reasons for you not to marry someone else if he had intentions for you.
The guy is evil. He spoilt her relationship and wanted to ruin her marriage and all this while holding on to his girlfriend. Poster,this guy means no good. FLEE from him. He is just a user
DeleteUsing you to cure konji as him wife no close and you are attaching emotions? Inwekwa uche Nne?
ReplyDeleteThe guy is a selfish person...he doesn't want to marry you and won't another person do...Run as far as you can from him..if he really loves you , he won't get married and would have proposed to...
ReplyDeleteIf he comes with stories again, tell him to divorce his wife, so you can be even...
Don't settle for a second wife, cos your self esteem is on a zero level...
That was how I add a male bestie in school, if not for self discipline and love of God, he would have done the do... Always telling me stories and giving rubbish signal... If such person can't ask me out before I marry or tell me he loves me now, he should not rear his ugly head and give me distractions when married...
What if he has HIV...
ReplyDeleteHey, I am just thinking aloud. The way you peeps just have random sex amazes me.
To the chronicle, he is a married man, keep off, look for how to uncrash your crashed marriage abi don't you know the first two years in marriage is quite dicey?
He is still married while you are not. Please help him respect his vows. #sugarcassie
ReplyDeleteWhy didnt he marry you despite your closeness? Maybe he justed wanted your ponyor and since hes gotten it,his eye go clear.
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeletewhy are some people mumu like this? God forbid!
NOTHING TO SAY
ReplyDeleteI have been in this situation just that the friend in question loved me and I only saw him more like a brother.
ReplyDeleteWhen I start dating a new guy he will be annoyed.
So one day I just gave it a thought after a heart-break that this guy has everything I want. Let me give him a chance. By this time he was dating a girl. After this guy slept with me once it was me that was now doing the Chase. Thankfully I quickly gather brain count my losses and moved on. Our relationship was already shaky when I started dating my ex. I just let go,sex or no sex I enjoyed it too. Last I heard this guy was in EFCC custody,all this money he had he had defrauded people. For 3yeaers no one know his whereabout if he is still in custody or on the run. I'm glad I didn't marry him.
Poster forget that relationship. This guy only wants the sex he has been imagining with you. Once he has it he will loose interest.
Please let him be and face his marriage. He won't leave his wife. When he change you will be shocked.
Stop thinking with your Lady part lol 😂 😂
ReplyDeleteLol ��
DeleteHmmmm Stella,thats a generic answer,atimes good things comes out from weird things oooo.She might be lucky
ReplyDeletePoster stay clear from him he is married he cannot leave his wife to marry you unless you want to become a second wife.
ReplyDeleteWhy did you invite him to your house in the first place, you can't eat your cake and have it. If you don't stay off this guy soon we will read your chronicle on how he impregnate you and abandon you...a word is enough for the wise.
Poster no matter what led to what, you shouldn't have slept with a married man. Do not be the reason why another woman cries at night. As for dat ur frenemy, FLEE from him.
ReplyDeleteNice advice from Stella. Biko move on, forget the sex. Start getting serious with your Christian life, face God & he will not fail u. It is well with you.
ReplyDelete'one thing led to the other' hahahaha.
ReplyDeleteA shoulder to lean on became a d**k to ride on.
ahahahahaa....
Deleteabrakadabra na. 😂😂😂😂
Leave him alone
ReplyDeletec wahala ooo Angela and Ghost of SDK blog. abeg in the name of almighty God waka pass... and go and look 4 ur own guy joor before we tag u home breaker of the year
ReplyDeleteyou guys can be friends with benefit. shekina
ReplyDeleteThe best measure to heal from heart break or emotional breakdown or divorce are
ReplyDelete1 -Gain your stand
2-have high self esteem
3-create yur happiness
4-never look back at whatever happen and blame yourself (even if there are some things on your part that led to it)
5- Look beautiful always (not about heavy makeup or expensive cloth)
6- Get groovy music and stay clear from blues unless its worship xtian song(that's if you are a xtian)
7-Delete, block every negative people including this guy,anybody that will not mak you smile
8-Never entertain opposite sex in an enclosed environment
9-Go out with female friends mostly singles because married girls might unconsciously remind you that you were once this and that.
10- Do not smell what you can not eat or eat to regret.
Stay woke and positive in your ways, the best lies ahead and not in the past.
but why didn't he ask you out in the ist place if he really likes you? why did he go ahead and marry his wife if truly you guys were destined to be together (just as he claimed o) I don't really trust him abeg. he will just use you and add to your sorrow. he is married already and there is nothing you or anyone can do about it
ReplyDeleteThis is my little piece of advice: married women, your male friends that are still single should not continue to remain your pals like nothing has changed. The frienship should be redefined and boundaries reset. Same goes for married men.
ReplyDeleteAccording to you, in the heat period of last month, you needed someone to pour your 'Konk' Konji on, so you called him. You booked an appointment to gbensh in your house since you stay alone...
ReplyDeleteAnd I can categorically say that you gave him the green light to go yonder. Do not play the victim, you're culpable...
Hmmm.
ReplyDeleteSorry for your marriage that did not work. The truth is you should have married this guy originally. I still dont know why we always shy away from the truth staring at us. You were opened to each other, loved each other, cared about each other, etc what else will the total stranger that both of you married do for you? He loves you and you love him but marrying each other might be difficult, a reality you must face. If he can agree to be your daddy father, go ahead but discuss it. Enjoy yourself if you have the mind and can damn the consequence eg if his wife gets to know or your family members know later, or when you are preginant, etc. Think about it very well but know that both of you should have married each other earlier instead of moving 360 degree looking for nothing.
I feel for you but we cannot help you beyond this level. Love freely and enjoy yourself. You have only one life.
You can also pray to seek for the face of God for guidance.
If he loved you, or even cared in the least bit , he would have said so and he would have married. That guy is demonic. Flee from him.
ReplyDeleteHe became friends with you at first just to sleep with you Now he has finally gotten what he was look for! For years, when he convince you and your family not to marry the first guy why didn't he marry you. My dear please do not open your cover clothe for him again...
ReplyDeleteHe literally wants to eat his cake and have it. He made you turn down your first proposal (which you foolishly did) and one would have expected that he would have probably proposed to you but still nothing happened. He kept living his life with his own girlfriend and even got married. You literally allowed this guy dictate what happens in your life now you both had sex and he's talking about being destined together. First of all just know that he'll not in a million years leave his wife for you,ever!
ReplyDeleteThe earlier you get back to your senses and think straight,the better for you. If you want to have sex or do anything you can always get yourself a boyfriend that isn't someone's husband. If you need someone to talk to call your sisters or other female close friends, your mum,family but not this guy cuz trust me he doesn't love you and like Stella said keep him away from your money. Take care of yourself, keep your self and thoughts happy and positive,do you always but stay away from this guy. Remember to always talk to God first. You'll be fine ❤
Girl why are you playing with fire? Flee from immorality, it will bring you nothing but pain, shame and heartache! Nothing good will come out of you sleeping with another woman's husband, NOTHING GOOD.
ReplyDeleteHe won't leave his wife for you, he will use you and continue to do so until you become useless. He will never allow you to find peace nor joy and will never give you the chance to get it together for another meaningful relationship to lead to marriage.
Change apartments, block and delete his numbers, block him from reaching you on any social media handle & tell your family to warn him to stay away from you (whatever reason you give them is up to you). Get close to God and work on your self esteem because it's like a doormat to this guy's ego 😩 & if you mistakenly see him, make sure you keep those legs close! He didn't love you enough to marry you but will "love" you enough to mess up your life & you are here allowing him? msheww.
Dear poster, you definitely know the "Genesis" and "Revelation" of your problems. Your narrative depicts one who did a lot of self reflection to identify the source of her problem. Next time, keep it short and save us the crap! Simply ask " I slept with a married man and loved it, can I keep screwing him?"
ReplyDeleteAnother case of no boundaries. People who have no boundaries in their relationships always find themselves in messed up situations. They are the ones who cheat, lie, keep secrets, reunite with exes and sleep with them, open themselves up to all manner of illicit affairs, etc. Poster go and learn the meaning of 'boundaries'. Google it and learn about it. I have no other advice for you.
ReplyDeleteJeez looking at comments like...if this poster is depressed about what happened, she should go and hang herself. People are harsh with words sha.
ReplyDeleteWell...Yeah adultery is involved, so ask for God's forgiveness sincerely and afterwards forgive yourself. Stay clear from this guy poster, if he wanted to marry you, he'd have married you and not sabotage your relationships and leave you hanging. Guys like him like to have their cake and eat it. As of today, no more bestie rubbish. Give yourself boundaries. Don't be the reason another woman cries at night. If he keeps forming love tell him not to talk to you about that if he's still married. And goodluck
Poster I can't judge you cos if i were in your shoes I probably would have gbensed too, you have feelings for this guy coupled with your emotional state at the moment it can't be easy and who knows maybe the guy has true feelings for you and maybe not, only God sees the heart but I would say you give him distance especially knowing that he is married you don't want to be burdened with the guilt that you wrecked someones home, If you two are meant to be it would work out in the right way.For all the judginas saying why dint the guy propose yenyenyen, life happens distance we meet different people along the way and sometimes it takes going through that cycle to know what u have and what you want, for some of us at the end of that cycle it's late while some get lucky to still have their heartthrob, am currently experiencing the same thing except in my case the guy never professed love for me but when we were in the same location we were really fond of each other I was closer to him than I was with my own brother,but life distance we stopped communicating as often coupled with the fact that am poor at keeping in touch with anyone,when he called me to tell me he was getting married I was happy and heartbroken not like we had anything going ever but I just wished it was me, funny cos i never knew I wanted that until he got married, I still post my pictures hoping he gets to see them, but deep down I know he's a gone case cos he has a kid now.
ReplyDeletePoster my marriage ended in just a year, I have to move on,people are telling you to leave another woman's man,hey,someone broke your marriage and you did not do anything to that person. I am not here to tell you what to do,or to tell you to break another one,but if you can use this dude to heal fast,get money,arrange yourself o be a better person,then go ahead to do that. Fuck with your head,do not be carried way, the guy may not love you,he may be playing with your feelings, use him to heal fast and dump his stupid ass.
ReplyDeleteIf he was real,he should have married you in the first place that putting you through he stress. Make sure do what makes you happy,don't listen to anyone, non of them has been there,my marriage packed up cos of some side chickens, am not ready to make another woman a divorce woman,but if your dog is not well chain, will use them to heal,make it,be strong and dump them. If their wife's get to know, leave that part for me,I will handle it,who good girl epp? I cannot lose everything, poster stay strong,find out what this dude want,shine Congo with him just to relax your emotions, men are trash,no man deserve your loyalty,deal with them oh cos na the same mama all of them get.
Men are not to be treated,love or care for, don't me under my comment to say trash,I don't red your advice, am selfish, body can decide for me.