Do you think it's right for a husband and wife to sleep in separate rooms in the same house?
Personally, I think it's bad.
I mean they can have separate rooms where they keep their stuff and observe quiet time and so on but in the night, they should come together and sleep.
Note that I said 'SLEEP', just an innocent sleep oh.
An incident that happened recently in my area further strengthened my stand on this.(Kai! who else finds it hard to write 'strength' correctly without the help of phone dictionary lol)
Back to our gist, a man in his forties died recently and he was already cold in his room before his wife discovered in the morning. He was said to be hypertensive. Now this man and his wife were not sleeping in the same room but separately.
Well, he is dead and there is this on-going debate in my neighbourhood concerning this issue of husband and wife sleeping in separate rooms.
Some people including myself are of the opinion that his death may have been averted if they had slept together, his wife would have noticed when he became distressed and done something fast.
So many questions on my mind now.
So many questions on my mind now.
I normally see only old couple practising this separate bed thingy. What would prompt a 46yrs old man and his wife, 40 to be sleeping separately? that is the age when life is just beginning abi? Dem dey talk say life begins at 40, no be so? Or they were not in good terms and were just living as flatmates? The thing is just disturbing me but I don't know who to ask as everybody is angry. I say make I con ask my fellow bvs and aprokos here.
Is there anyone practising this thing here? What is the cause? How are you enjoying it?
Mama Tee
There is nothing wrong
ReplyDeleteWhen it's one's time to die, others presence in the room will not stop it. I would like to sleep in a separate room because of my snoring.
DeleteI hate sleeping alone.
DeleteSome people hate sharing bed with others. I have a sister, if she lies on the bed with another person beside her, she won't be able to sleep.
DeleteAs for me, I love sharing the bed with someone I love. When I lost my husband, I brought my kids to lie beside me. No matter where I sleep, they are by my side. When they grow big, I will let the male sleep separately but the females will be by my side except they leave for school or their husband's house.
You are the only one that finds it difficult spelling 'strength' o...biko. As for the topic,I will cross the bridge when I get there.
ReplyDeleteSleeping in separate room is not good. It doesn't help in resolving conflicts easily.
ReplyDeleteMy sister is even of the opinion that couples bed shouldn't be too wide so that their bodies can touch each other all the time😁😁
Exactly,I will never support sleeping separately
DeleteBonding is important
I can never be in support of such, even when my kids sleep in our room all of us will sqeeze ourselves on the bed like that, no one goes anywhere
DeleteThis is what i have been going through for some months now.
DeleteMake una epp me ooooooo!!!
Am telling you,if wahala too much we change from d 6by6 to 3by3 make we no dey vex stay for edge😂😂😂
DeletePLEASE SLEEP ON THE SAME BED,iv seen cases where a couple didn't exchange a word for 8months,not a single word and in the same house!!
A friends husband left their not so big bed to her when she was pregnant,I kept insisting to make sure she forces him to sleep on the bed,shes delivered her baby still uncle no dey come bed,now she just got to know he is alws on the phone with a lady from 10pm....hmm
I and hubby are sleeping in separate rooms cos his way of snoring is so thunderous dat I stay up all nyt tapping and hitting him out of frustation.
DeleteMaybe after giving birth all of us will move to a room BUT different beds biko.
Lols @ cutie
DeleteMy sister n hussy sleep in different room. My sister is 33.hussy 40.she started it cos of her baby. But she visit the husband room sometimes but not always.
ReplyDeleteWhen I'm married I will be sleeping separate esp when baby arrives. If I marry my present guy then I don't know as the guy can cuddle ehh. And his cuddle is the one you can't sleep. The kind of cuddle that people don't know of yet, I wonder where he invented his own. So it separate room before cuddle will make me lose my leg mbuk
Dey there and allow him to be cuddling ya tohtoh every night.
DeleteHe will certainly NOT marry you; he is not missing anything at all
When he fills ya tummy you probably go and shoot out the babies and expect him
to marry scattered womb? No!
Hahahahaha.
DeleteComment stress reliever straight!
We sleep in separate rooms, because my lil girl takes the bed to herself and she did not agree at all to sleep on her bed oo. Now oga sleep with baby boy and they enjoy AC while me and baby girl sleep in our room and we dont like AC or Fan at night. We're cool with it but winter time we squeeze ourselves in the same bed we can't sleep on during summer time 😂😂😂😂 I see nothing wrong with it
Delete😂😂😭😂 so instead u to tap him and ask him nicely to ease up you just lie down there cursing in your mind.. This scene is cracking me up😂😂😂
DeleteYour comment cracked me up. He sure invented his own cuddling. You sef, try and tell him na
Deletehahahahahahaahahahaha chai una no well for this blog
DeleteBiko comman describe this cuddling that's never been heard of,I'm not big on cuddles overnight cos I move around a lot.
DeleteEyaaa...me sha, I love being spooned
DeleteLols @ breaking of legs.
Delete19:58, which one is spooned again?
"Innocent sleep?"
ReplyDeleteYou failed to explain to us the other sleep that is not innocent. I did not know there are "innocent and guilty" sleep among married couples.
Talk about sleep courts!
😂😂😂 the other sleep na that one naa...abeg anon leave Mama Tee alone
DeleteI hol am?
DeleteVery soon now una go say na anonyghost
be "guilty sleep"
In my opinion, it depends on the couple.
ReplyDeleteLike for instance now,I no longer sleep in my matrimonial bedroom cos of my baby.
I sleep with my baby in her room cos she is still a baby,besides I sleep there cos she has her own room n I wouldn't want to disturb hubby @ night doing our things(breastfeeding, changing of diaper n d likes).
So pending on when I finish weaning my baby,I can now go back to our room(I n hubby).
With these sef,we often crash with hubby in his room.
Buy baby monitor dear and a cot for your baby. You can sleep with your hus and go to d room when d monitor beeps.
DeleteIf u start now u may not stop.
Sleeping with your baby no join this talk. It's expected.
DeleteBaby monitor will help the disturbance too, on/off the bed at night?
DeleteLmaoooo @matrimonial bedroom.
DeleteMatrimonial toilet nko?
Madam let him get use to it oo is the baby not his child?
DeleteI share the same bed with hubby and baby o, anyone of us who wake first to baby's cry attend to him. When he's much older he will sleep on another bed in the room with us.
Why don't you want to disturb him with feedings?madam put the baby cot in your room and sleep together....
DeleteI slept with my baby till she was one, then went back to our bed. My daughter sleeps in her room 80% of the time and I have a monitor to watch her.
DeleteYou both had the baby. Let the baby disturb him too biko
DeleteBefore marriage, girlfriend go dey live in with man in same room. After marriage, to ya tents o Israel.
ReplyDeleteLmao. The irony!
Deletehahaha @ to ya tent o isreal but na true
DeleteIt doesn't change anything in d marriage, cos sometimes my mom sleeps in her room, some days I'd see popsi in her room too, sometimes she'd be in his room, they call it rationing... Lol...just understand ur man/woman, don't copy A, cos there's no blueprint to a sucesexful marriage.
ReplyDeleteNice response.....
DeleteLol at sucesexful
DeleteI practice it cos he fuck like dog.and my body catch so easly I have 4kids if i continue sleeping like before my dear I will have 2football teams. I do sleep with him but not always and sometimes I want my privacy our rooms are close
ReplyDeleteContraceptives?
DeleteVasectomy or tubal ligation?
DeleteYa horseband fuck like dog.. you is a bad child...
DeleteMy dear go for family planning and enjoy freely without running away from your husband. Except you don't like sex. Couples should always find a balance. If couples have built that connection of understanding each other then love making should be mutual(most of the times). The more bonding you have, you will not feel that it is too much from one side. When your partner wants it,you will want it too. Find time to go out for dinner once in a while, send text messages during the day,chitchat when you are in bed. It helps to strengthen the bond.
DeleteIf that horseband of yours "fork" like dog
DeleteE mean say ya tohtoh na bitch own.
I don't like it.
ReplyDeleteWhen your wife is not your friend they end up sleeping in separate rooms and note that this isn't planned it is just that way since they werent friends from time this doesnt mean they dont love eachother doesnt mean they cheat on eachother or care about eachother it's just a scenario where the showing of affection,love and care is one sided or none and the sex is always in dark ofthe night without too much communication and this leads to failure to achieve greatness together as a couple and it ends in separation that can never be reconcilled.
ReplyDeleteAnon 12.19 they forced you to comment? You lie ma friend
DeleteAnon 13:42 the fact that you don't agree with it doesn't make it a lie
DeleteLmaooooooo opinion of nowamagbe
Delete14.18 read again... that is a big lie up there!!!
DeleteLongest sentence ever
DeleteAnonymous 12:07 which cuddle dey break leg again. Well i am a party to sleep in same room till old age. It's better for the couple.
ReplyDeleteI was shocked to learn that some nigerian couples sleep separately. Even in korean dramas you can see them sleeping in the same room but on different beds, i can never understand that
ReplyDeleteIn-fact that would be the most difficult thing for me to do cos my hubby was so helpful when my twins were still babies. even before i get up to fees them, he has already made the food and would feed them simultaneously. funny enough he prays most part of the night. My advice is that couples stay together in the same room. It help to improve the bonding.
ReplyDeleteThank you. When I had my 1st child,we were all sleeping in the same room oo,myself and hubby did the vigil together. Sometimes my hubby picks him up to allow me sleep the 1st few months. Now that he's very much older,I put him to sleep in his to and go back to sleep beside my hubby.Of which if I sleep off in our son's room,he will come himself to wake me up.It really helped and its helping our friendship.
Delete*to sleep in his room*
DeleteIt all depends on the couple's mindset, emotional stability, health condition and mode of life. Some people don't like to be choked up and sometimes need space.
ReplyDeleteJust understand yourself and your partner then stick to what works for you.
Very well said.
DeleteNice one
DeleteIts not good to sleep separately. To live alone is risky let alone sleeping separately in your own house. Unless where the man has loads in his life (wives), he can practice it at his own fault.
ReplyDeleteOne thing I learnt from my late parents, they slept together all through and may be that was why we didn't see them quarrel.
One advantage of couple sleeping together is - it helps them mend/settle their issues fast.
gbam..... even when they had issues, pops will now jokingly tell momsie to come nau, sebi its still me.....na so laugh go enter. quarrel don end.
DeleteLol@quarrel don end😄
DeleteI don’t think it’s ideal for couples to sleep in separate rooms. I heard most people does it because of new born babies, they can put baby cot in their room if that is the case.
ReplyDeleteMy parents sleep in different rooms and now they are flatmates. They've been married for over 40years. Funny thing is, before moving into our own house many years ago, they used to sleep on the same bed (room and palour self contain things). But after building a house the church they were attending at the time (cele) told my gullible dad to sleep in separate rooms due to the "impurity" of menstruation. And that was how their marriage started to take a nose dive. Now, that I'm married, my spouse and I sleep on the same bed even with the arrival of our baby. The baby has his cot and we sometimes take turns in looking after him at nights. We do not have any intention to sleep in separate rooms. E no dey help.
ReplyDeleteYou see
DeleteIt Can't even work for me that loves cuddling
Who cuddling help...well i think everyone should just stick to what works for them..simple..
DeleteCuddling epp me well well
DeleteA couple both medical doctors in their late 50s were sleeping in separate rooms. One morning he wakes up and discovers the wife was still asleep-quite unlike her. He went to her room, knocked and knocked! Eventually he and some domestic staff broke down the door. His wife lay dead on the bed. Being a doctor he could have saved her if they slept together. May her soul Rest on. Amen.
ReplyDeletePeople who sleep in same room during their sleep too. Let's stop accusing separate rooms biko. Inukwa injustice
DeleteYes ooo... I was just having this conversation with my married sister the other day. I told her I would want my own separate room when I'm married. But she was against it and said it can make a man become promiscuous because he won't be getting enough sex. But really, is it not getting enough sex that makes men cheat in marriage? Cos I know many women give their husbands excess sex and the man most times gets tired of their body. I think the separate room thing will prevent overfamiliarity from setting in. When a man is always seeing your nakedness every single day, he will surely get tired of your body.
ReplyDeleteAsides from that, I love my privacy like kilode. I like to read too and I need quietness most times. Its just my person. But then again, it depends on the personality of the couple so each his own.
In marriage,one has to sacrifice so many things. I don't share bed or bathroom but I get no choice now.
DeleteDiscuss with your spouse when that time comes.
I think you can seperate rooms and still sleep together at night,u could dress up in ur own room,read there ,watch tv there,even make love there but once its time to sleep at night you guys should sleep together, could be in ur own room or his as long as u both sleep bside each other, its that time hubby and i gist and gossip abt neighbours and friends bfor we finally doze off,helps with bonding
DeleteThank you. That bedtime gisting is the koko
DeleteMe I wish I can sleep in separate room o.cos this my hubby no dey allow my sleep fa.everyday gbenshing. I only sleep well if I'm in my period.and is not like we're trying to conceive o..in fact I'm done with childbearing. He's an early waker.. He wakes up by 4am and he will start touching and chuking me with his iron rod.and me na that time sleep dey sweet me pass.in fact I'm tired.wish I can have my separate room abeg before he'll kill me one day.
ReplyDeleteAbeg make noone wake me up @ 4am for xes...I go vex I tell u
DeleteHmmmm
DeleteMost Men and sex are like two pea in a pod
I love early morning sleep like 😴😴😴😴😴😴😴
Eeeeyaaa sorry
Delete😂😂pele
DeleteI think it depends on individual, but it is better couple sleeps in the same room to avoid stories that touch, the woman can have her own room for her stuff
ReplyDeleteIt's like people don't like cuddling oh. Ha!
ReplyDeleteIt is good for couple sleep in same room
ReplyDeleteIt is bad biko. The day you and your hubby won fuc*.even if not. As far say the kids Don know say una two dey that same room na fucking tins dey their mind and them go dey monitor una sound and moaning and even peeping thru.
ReplyDeleteI don't support the separate room thingy. Those of you saying its because you don't want to get pregnant, why don't you do family planning if your husband cannot wear condom during your unsafe period? if its because baby cries and it irritates your hubby and he is in support of separate room, then go ahead. But if it's because of bed space, here is what I did.
ReplyDeleteWhen I had my baby, me and hubby continued sleeping on the same bed and baby slept in the baby cot placed in the room. When she cries for food, I will wake up and go pick her up, breastfeed her and put her back there, then go back to sleep. Hubby liked her to be with us and was the one that would sometimes wake me up when she whines for food.
Baby stayed in the cot in our room till she clocked one year. Then I invited my mum over when I wanted to wean her, she slept with my mum in separate room and my mum gives her tea when she cries until she forgot the breast and started eating other foods. When she was a year and six months, my mum left us and baby started sleeping alone in her room. Her bed was gaurded on the sides so she won't roll and fall on the floor. I used to go and carry her to urinate at intervals. Now she is 5yrs old and so used to her room. She sleeps alone in her room whose door is opposite our own room. The two doors are always open so I see her room and hear anything going on there, I also check on her when I wake up to urinate. When I and my hubby want to make love, we lock our door and open it again when we are through. I only sleep in my daughter's room when she is not feeling fine.
This is what works for us.
Thumbs up
DeleteMthsewwww..Madam sabi sabi,not everyone has mum that can come and stay for that long,like i said,lets everyone do what works for them biko..if you lock and open,kids go don decode wetin una dey do,i remember growing up,i am always peeping to watch my mum and dad oo
Delete15:12
DeleteDo what works for you. I just shared mine.
Inviting your mum over is not the only method you can use to wean your child. There are other ways. My point is, whichever way one uses, sleeping together with my husband on the same bed works for me.
There Is Nothing Bad If Dy Both Own Their Seperate Rooms Atleast 4 Privacy. But Most Nights They Should Sleep Together In Same Room. They Are 1
ReplyDeleteI don't believe in separate rooms most especially for young couples. I believe the bond of sharing a bed makes you closer and it also forces you to resolve issues on time.
ReplyDeleteEven if I live in a 50 room mansion I will still share a room. One thing I don't like sharing though is bathroom/toilet. He has his, and I have mine. Makes even getting ready in the morning easier.
Whatever works for each couple anyway. Some people also like their individual space.
I'm not married but I plan to sleep in separate rooms when I get married. I love my privacy. Plus if you sleep ion the same room your husband will soon get tired of you and your body that's why most married men cheat. If he want to have sex he can come to your room and if you want to have sex you can go to his room. It's best to keep an aura of mystery around you and your body. Even with food when you eat too much of something you get tired even if it's your favourite food. So as far as I'm concerned separate rooms are better. And no same rooms doesn't help with bonding. You can bond during the day or in many different ways.
ReplyDeleteO Chim! Kuku live in different countries na
DeleteSo far as I'm not having sex, I don't like someone's body touching me while I'm asleep. So it's different rooms or same room, separate beds for me.
DeleteKwakwakwakwakwa
DeleteI will die on this post today. So if you sleep in different rooms, he won't get tired of your body and so he won't cheat? Lmao
hahahaahahahaha queen iri bad
DeleteIt is easy to form opinion when you are not married. So you will be bonding during the day when both of you are supposed to be working?. The fact that you sleep in the same room doesn't mean you will be having sex everyday,its more than that. A lot happens in the night from not been able to sleep,to being scared or having a bad dream which your spouses can help you calm your spirit. It gives room to been able to talk about issues when you are alone especially when kids are involved. When you know you know
ReplyDeleteWhen your body is going through changes and your hubby is not aware because you have your so called privacy,the day he's interested in sex and you go naked for him,your body can even irritates him and he looses interest. Getting tired of once spouse is not from sleeping together everyday,its actually from living together. Its only God that can help.
ReplyDeleteHahahahahahahaha
DeleteYour body will now look strange to him. But if he sees it evryday, nothing go happen abi?
16:03. Did you read well? especially the the last paragraph?...I think anonymous was responding to 14:28.
ReplyDeleteSeperate room bcos of baby ke or that the cry would irritate hubby... if i hear.... wasnt it dddy and mommy that made baby? So ur good to procreate bt not good to take care of ur child? Women give men too much hand for this nonsense to happen. My dear all this is part of parenthood and bonding. Noone asked u to bring a child in d world u cant sacrifice sleep for. Except the woman aint working so she can sleep during the day when baby is sleeping.. if not pls all parties sleep in the same room biko...
ReplyDeleteThank you
DeleteThey both brought the baby into the world, let them both bear whatever it brings together
I sleep in a separate room because my husband smokes and drink a lot without having is bath. I have persuaded , begged but he is not changing. Also I like hard bed but he like soft bed. We have sex either he comes or i go
ReplyDeletehard bed and soft bed. chai , marriage with all hin idiosyncrasies.
ReplyDelete