Mama Tee Series -Lagos Marriage

How do you move in with a man, have kids and live together for years without making him pay your bride price?

This issue is the cause of a raging issue in my church at the moment which prompted the church authorities to order all the married couples to present their marriage certificates or proof of a bride price payment.

There is this Elder in his 50s, a respected man in the church. 

Last October, his wife fell sick and died. The church in its usual tradition rose in support of the family, cash donation was announced, a bus was set aside to convey people to Delta state when the burial date is fixed and so on.

Now, this February, the church committee members noticed that the woman's corpse was staying too long in the morgue with no suitable explanation from the Elder, anytime they meet with this man in order for him to brief them on the burial arrangement, he would say "my wife's family said this, they said that, her uncle said.., her mum said..'

They did not understand why he did not have a say in his wife's burial arrangement, a woman he lived with for over 20yrs. So the head of the committee called the eldest child secretly and asked her what was going on. That was when the bombshell was released.

Elder had been telling them lies all this while. He was not properly married to the woman all these years. No bride price was paid until her death and so the family insisted that before he can bury their daughter, he has to come down to her village and perform the marriage rites. If he fails to do so, he would see Hell.

Elder could not afford all of these and he was too ashamed to open up to the church. So the woman's corpse remained in the morgue, the controversy within the two families raged on and Elder continued to lie to the church.


Now, the church have sent Elder on indefinite suspension till they decide the next line of action to take on the matter.


Mama Tee