Sunday Laughs

You can before you go to Church or when you come back but please dont open this in Church ooooooh...LOL

When I was in school, I used to ask a lot of questions....!!
One Day I asked Ms. Doris, our English teacher:"
Why do.we ignore some letters in pronunciation. eg the letter....'H'.......in Hour, Honest, Honor..... e.t.c.........???"


Ms. Doris: "We are not ignoring them; they are considered silent." ...!!
(I was even more confused.........??)


During the lunch break, MS. Doris gave me her packed
lunch and asked me to heat it in the cafeteria.

I ate all the food and returned her an empty container....!!


Ms. Doris:---- "What happened, I told you to go and HEAT my food and you are returning me an empty container??"

Me: --- ".Madam I thought 'H' was silent"




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Am done with Nigerian movies, how can a native doctor say, the charm will work in Jesus name....

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Guys!
Best way to propose to a girl
Take her in a boat to the middle of the river and say " Chiamaka marry me or leave my boat.
Wisdom na my baptismal name

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Some African Parents will be like 'I will not place Curse on you, but whatever you do to me your children will do you same. Is this one a Proclamation or a Declaration???




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Everyone has a right to be Foolish but some Idiots use it Stupidly.
Teacher: Mention 10wild animals
Student: 5lions. 5tigers. . . . . .




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My school teacher taught me most of the Lies I tell today, she would tell me to write a letter to my Uncle abroad when she knows my Uncle is in the Village.




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My mom entered my room and saw me asleep. She held my head, slapped me and said to me "Your last seen on Whatsapp was 1minute ago, stand up and go buy me bread"




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Some people don't have the Spirit of Forgiveness at all, How can u sweep your room and use ur Ex' Picture as paker???





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No one is more Respectful than a person who wants to borrow money from u....... He can even greet ur dog .....
Hello Bingo how are u?    ⚡ ⚡ ⚡




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I didnt understand what Prime Minister Theressa May meant by asking me to allow gay marriage in Nigeria
~ President Buhari


#Akpos:
He said you should allow Bola Tinubu to marry you and Oyegun to Marry Rotimi Amaechi.
#Dazzol



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MEDICAL FACTS​​​​


*Did you know that, if you bath at least twice daily, avoid alcohol, avoid smoking tobacco and go to gym everyday for fitness, have sufficient sleep, eat fruits after each meal, avoid stress, stop using all sorts of drugs including caffeine found in tea and coffee and practise safe sex regularly, you will still die in future?*

Come and beat me , do you think you are the only one who wasted your time reading this?


🏾‍♀



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Happening now at Ogba bus stop! There is confusion at Ogba now as a girl about 20 years old, with a big handbag boarded a cab heading to Agege.The driver being vibrant felt a strong smell coming from the girl's handbag .The horrible smell made the driver suspicious , whom then use the light to signal the police at the stop and search point but because of 50 Naira the police were too busy to notice this. When he got to Ogba he raised alarm and people held the girl. Many people were afraid not knowing what was happening . One of the men was shocked when he opened the girl's bag and found three heads in the girl's bag. After cross examination of the heads, the crowd found out that the heads were known heads.
It was the head of garlic, onion, and fresh tomato .
I appreciate your effort in reading this.
You can continue what you were doing.


Back to my study am just having a break.
Am at home come and beat me


All work no play sekini O?



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*Don't let ur boyfriend put a girl on his dp and write Rip...it might also mean 'Relationship in Progress" don't trust MEN....Some of dem ooh Biko**Chaaiiii oooohh Wisdom ehhh* 🤣




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If a woman listens to you for less than 5 minutes then she is your daughter.


If a woman listens to you for about 15 minutes then she is your sister.


If a woman listens to you for over 30 minutes then she is your mother.


And ultimately


If a woman pretends to listen to u all the time but does not remember a word of what you said no matter how important, then she is....???????
Yes , Yes....

You are correct!!!!!!

X
.
*SHE IS DEAF!!!!!!!!!!*


Why bring wife into every joke. Haba!




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Jeff had gone to propose to his girlfriend and returned home crying bitterly. "What happened, son?" his father asked, eagerly awaiting her response. "Did she accept?"


"No, she sure didn't," sobbed Jeff. "When I told her what you advised me to say, she slapped my face and told me to get out."


"Did you begin by telling her what I told you to say, what I told your mother when she accepted my proposal? 'Sweetheart, time stands still when I look in your eyes.' Did you tell her that?" asked his father.


"Oh boy, Dad, did I got it all wrong," Jeff groaned. "I said, 'My dear, you have a face that would stop a clock!'"


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