BROUHAHA OVER MONEY ISSUES:
Hello stella and my fellow BVs. I seriously need your advise urgently.
Here is my story,I got married last year to my husband. Before we got marry, I actually have close to #2m in my account while my husband has nothing in his account. He collected loan from his workplace but the twinkas and MMM chop the money. After the wedding and few months, I was the taking care of the house because he was paying the loan little by little.
I got pregnant and delivered through Ceaseran section which cost my husband and his family money,i only drop 20k to add with the money. Note that my husband didn't have any money in his account.
Then, we wanted to do naming ceremony,so I told my husband that he should give me money for the cloth because I don't want to be forming Mrs independent woman.
That is where the problem start ooo, he just flare up that I know he doesn't have any money in his account that I should wear the cloth I have with me. I was angry and I refused to talk to him, then the following day his mother was bathing our baby and my husband entered the room, Mil was telling me that won't I greet my husband and I didn't answer my MIL.
Now, my husband and his mother were talking and I heard that he was reporting to his mother that I didn't appreciate all what he has done during the delivery of our baby,that he spent much money and even borrow from his colleagues which is true and also mentioning divorce that he will collect my baby from me.
Please did I over-react by not talking to my husband and ignoring his mother when MIL asked me to greet my husband?.
Here is my story,I got married last year to my husband. Before we got marry, I actually have close to #2m in my account while my husband has nothing in his account. He collected loan from his workplace but the twinkas and MMM chop the money. After the wedding and few months, I was the taking care of the house because he was paying the loan little by little.
I got pregnant and delivered through Ceaseran section which cost my husband and his family money,i only drop 20k to add with the money. Note that my husband didn't have any money in his account.
Then, we wanted to do naming ceremony,so I told my husband that he should give me money for the cloth because I don't want to be forming Mrs independent woman.
That is where the problem start ooo, he just flare up that I know he doesn't have any money in his account that I should wear the cloth I have with me. I was angry and I refused to talk to him, then the following day his mother was bathing our baby and my husband entered the room, Mil was telling me that won't I greet my husband and I didn't answer my MIL.
then I was keeping malice with my husband.
Now, my husband and his mother were talking and I heard that he was reporting to his mother that I didn't appreciate all what he has done during the delivery of our baby,that he spent much money and even borrow from his colleagues which is true and also mentioning divorce that he will collect my baby from me.
And to make the matter worst, my mil was not helping the matter at all. She was just adding petrol in the fire, that I was lazy and I left everything for her to be doing.I just keep mute and I was looking at them and shaking my head.
I was furious that my husband too didn't appreciate all what I have done so far by taking care of the house and during our wedding.
Please did I over-react by not talking to my husband and ignoring his mother when MIL asked me to greet my husband?.
let me start by shaking my head at you?what kind of a person are you?you have money in your account but stressing someone you know does not have?Even if you didnt want him to know you had money,you could have taken care of that and told him you had the clothe before or borrowed money from someone else...
How can you ignore your husband in front of his mother?And you think she will support you?You have handed the devil a personal IV to come into your home and interfer...
You could have greeted your hubby with a kiss just becos his mum was there!!!
And when you walked into them gossiping you,you could have confronted them to clear the air.......
You better go and sort things out...YOU WERE WRONG!!!
No amount of love any mother in law get for the wife,it can't amount to the one for her son,u shouldn't have reacted that way in her presence,u acted childish there,try and apologize to both of them and change ur ways
ReplyDeleteThank you. Noted
DeleteMadam simply put... You like trouble. You need wisdom and grace to mend things back in your home.
DeleteI dint even finish reading, I just had to comment, you are wicked and do not have respect. how can you not contribute in your own home, I dint say you should finish it, but someone like me cannot risk my health for anyone, you still asked for new cloth knowing what his account balance is, ahh my dear this is not how they do marriage o.
DeleteSecondly, you did not have a right to disrespect his mother because of simple cloth, she had nothing to do with it, all of you forming in marriage, you will tell me why you married a poor man. About his discussion with his mum, he felt disgusted at the way you reacted and you will not blame the mother for adding fuel, you showed her disrespectful you are by not answering her even with all the help she has rendered, just apologize
Stella you are spot on.
DeleteI get where the poster is coming from. But don't completely avoid contributing. Help out but don't carry all your money and give them.
DeleteSolution
Apologize to both n explain that u were not happy with him that's y
THis poster is childish!!!
DeleteStella gbam, gbammer, gbammest.
ReplyDeleteYou knew all along but because people on this blog don talk say stop forming Mrs Independent, you too go ask your horseband for money to buy clothes for Naming. I know say una like party too much and must wear new clothes for naming but you could have considered all that you both went thru.
Anyway I support your horseband and his mother. Better start greeting him and keep praying to God to help you and him win over this battle of money issh
I didn't like party, my mil want the party being their first grandchild. And my mil said I shouldn't wear d cloth that anyone has among my friends which is what I have.
DeletePoster...you have a bad mentality and your attitude stinks and it shows. I bet you forced yourself on this man to marry you, maybe because u got pregnant because it is insane to borrow money to do wedding, now your hubby is busy paying igbese in ur first year of marriage. With ur miserable 2million he still borrowed money for the delivery of ur own child o, abi is it not ur child? Then you are more concerned about cloth to wear for naming because you want to show off what you don't have. You willingly married a man that did not have and now you want to send him to an early grave. If you don't want him pack your load and go, you do not have priority, you lack manners. Ps I am a woman, married for 10years with 3 kids...what I've done for my hubby in times of need, to the tune of over 50million, his family will never know about it. So keep shut with ur miserable 2million and learn some good manners.
DeleteI see where you're coming from Mrs poster. Poster didn't say she has 2m now. She said she had it and has being paying for the house etc. Now husband family want naming and they've put the biggest expense if all on her. Mil said buy new clothes. Hubby says no money. Hubby has bring ostinf his debr but that doesn't mean he should take care if his household. If he can't buy the dress, he should explain to his wife calmly. Mil has to go. She is causing fights by supporting her son's anger and talking poorly about Dil. That's very wrong. They can't take your child from you. Evil people. Where is your mother. She better come visit before mil destroys your marriage. Don't fight in front of her...that part is true but not enough for them to start saying all they said behind your back
DeleteHmmm.....but you know oga was broke and you still went ahead to be with. You had a choice if you knew you would not tolerate his broke ass.
ReplyDeleteDon’t mind her! She’s a wicked wife. It’s a different case if she didn’t know her hubby’s financial situation but she knew he was broke yet she was asking for money to buy cloth for naming. If you don’t buy new clothes will you die? My hubs lost his job shortly after we married, I had to do CS and guy spent all he had and even borrowed cos then I was yet to be enrolled on ippis as a newly employed civil servant so I had no salary. His family sponsored the naming and we just Jejely wore one of the outfits we used for our wedding at the naming and nobody died. We are fine now and doing great thank God
Deleteoshey my dear. life na jeje. when una know say una broke una for te slow for pregnancy at least 6 months to balance a bit. pls a hungry man is an angry man. a broke man sees everything like insult. be guided
Deletestella,you said the truth.poster you were wrong in your actions..you know he had no money and you went to ask him for money.
ReplyDeleteStop acting like a child,I can't believe you won't see something nice to wear in your wardrobe,go back and check,you knew his financial state at the moment and you are still asking for money for clothes,if that is already causing quarell then who sponsors the feeding and drinks for the naming,stop living above his income and disrespecting him in front of his mum,better make peace with your hubby and forget about all the preparation of naming,because obviously the money required is not available unless you want to take charge,which I wouldn't advice,call your pastor and family members and do parlor naming.
DeleteYou said your husband is broke,so what is d essence of having a big nameing and even buying a new cloth? You should have also greeted him wen your mother in law asked you to, that is called respect. Pls if u have d monet buy a new cloth or better still wear the one you have, you don't have to explain to anyone. Learn to support your hubby in times of need or do you want hbp to kill him? God forbid.
DeletePlease apologise to your hubby and also his mother. Thank you
You marry rich man,
ReplyDeleteYou marry broke man,
You marry generous or aka super glue,
Man na man o..
Delete ur alerts...
If u have 1m, tell him u have 300k, if u have 300k tell him 100k, better guy won't chook eye in ur finance sef except he really really needs assistance.
My opinion!
U are too correct
DeleteThank you very much BlackBerry. I always support my husband even till house rent, I gave him half payment, I just don't want to make him comfortable that his wife will always sort herself out.
DeleteThank you very much. My favourite word to my husband is I am broke.
DeleteHe will say do you ever have money.hahahahahahaha
But you have to do these things with wisdom. My husband can't be broke and I wont help when necessary. Especially for my kids.
My clothes and stuff,i buy them myself.
But nothing feels as good when your husband takes care of you. I was just singing my usual song of I'm broke o. My salary has finished,i don't even have data. I was moody throughout.
This morning he sent me money. I just smiled when I saw the alert. He messaged me."hope you are okay now".
Mind you I have money,but in savings and fixed deposit. Which my husband doesnt know about. If not he will be saying. Shebi you have so and so amount,do this yourself.
But trust me if my husband is in dire need or an emergency I will still touch the money.
As a married woman you do everything with wisdom.
It's either you forgo this cloth or you buy it yourself. Do not kill your husband that is already under pressure. You are newly weds and new parents. Enjoy the time instead of bickering over cloth.
Plus u are the one taking care if the house, so how would he be the one to take the baby?
DeleteI don't understand this? You guys are owing money and still did naming ceremony that needed new clothes?. SMH. What happened to naming ceremony with 10 people in attendance. Ya both stepped. Imagine. No savings, owing and. Borrowing. SMH. Am so 'hangry' Rai na.
DeleteYou have read too many Chronicles here and u forgot every story is different. Your case is different cos your husband sounds like a good man,
You just disrespected him in front of his mother.
You are probably lazy like your mil said, better start petting that woman u have a good mil.
I advise you to apologise to her, and to your husband on your knees. Una sabi do eye service pass.
Try to be understanding of your husband's plight, you can hide your account details if u don't want him to know. You can offer 50k to him as your life savings and hide the rest. In alltry annd be respectful to him. When the loans are all paid off you both can than sit down and decide on the way dfinances will be handled
I don't understand this? You guys are owing money and still did naming ceremony that needed new clothes?. SMH. What happened to naming ceremony with 10 people in attendance. Ya both stepped. Imagine. No savings, owing and. Borrowing. SMH. Am so 'hangry' Rai na.
DeleteYou have read too many Chronicles here and u forgot every story is different. Your case is different cos your husband sounds like a good man,
You just disrespected him in front of his mother.
You are probably lazy like your mil said, better start petting that woman u have a good mil.
I advise you to apologise to her, and to your husband on your knees. Una sabi do eye service pass.
Try to be understanding of your husband's plight, you can hide your account details if u don't want him to know. You can offer 50k to him as your life savings and hide the rest. In alltry annd be respectful to him. When the loans are all paid off you both can than sit down and decide on the way dfinances will be handled
Stinging wicked woman.. And yet you want ur mother in law to support you.. Ode
ReplyDeleteShut your fucking mouth up. I'm not a stingy wicked woman, I just don't want him to comfortable that I will always sort myself out.
DeleteMadam,will u like ur hubby to go into depression when u habe d money?u could have quietly bought a dress anf told him u have bought it since in preparation for d naming.from ur natrative i can understand ur hubby is doing his best.pls maam,assist ur husband in any way possible u wont die.
DeleteThe hubby is wicked to be discussing divorce so soon though.. This woman is not stingy...She takes care of the bills in the house.
DeleteSee u saying someone shld shut their fucking mouth up...you amaze urself not me! Did you not know his financial status before u said I do? Did any one force u, why are u bothered? Leave him alone since you are a billionaire. You overreacted and you can't take correction I pity your husband o. You are obviously ill mannered and immature...time will tell. Go and learn manners nobody forced you.
DeleteThe hubby is not wicked, the woman knew from beginning what she was getting into. If he had money he will take care of things or didn't u read the part where she said he took loan to marry her, and borrowed money for hospital bills? If he's wicked he won't care. She strikes me as one who listens to friends and they will ruin her.
DeleteSo easy to advise others about their relationship....will you keep kwayet, Stelly?
ReplyDeleteIts me, Taye...beat me if you can.
hahahahaha
DeleteSome people think marriage is all about sex and I love you
ReplyDeleteIt's more than that. Poster you are very selfish, you know your hubby does not have and asking for money. Please where do you expect him to get the money?
When they (mil& hubby) start treating you anyhow, you will say your MIL is wicked whereas you are the evil one.
Go apology to her,tell her it's love that was catching that is why you didn't greet your hubby. Apology to hubby and say you were only pulling his leg.
Pray for God mercy and wisdom on how to handle your home.
Tiwa
I have apologize to both my husband and his mother. Thank you
DeleteLol @love catching. Poster, better go and apologies to ur hubby and mil. Must u wear new clothes for naming sef?
DeletePoster it's good you apologized but don't dash him all your money abeg. He will relax and expect you to take care of things.
DeletePlease did I over-react by not talking to my husband and ignoring his mother when MIL asked me to greet my husband?.
ReplyDeleteyes, you over reacted. no matter how upset you are with your husband, you should not have let your MIL in on it. the marriage is between you and him, but you made it between three people, thats why she now has a right to talk.
besides, it is just cloth. the naming ceremony will go, people will forget but the two of you will be in the marriage for a long time. dont let temporary things make you make a permanent decision. if you are keeping malice because of cloth, then you are a funny person oh.
you are doing well in taking care of the house (let me praise you) but you should also understand where he is coming from. its also not easy for him as a man.
The only person that actually answr d the chronicle question reasonably!! You are wise!!
Deleteposter you are wicked. your husband don't have and he has enough debt to settle and you want to kill him with expenses.
ReplyDeleteI'm not saying that you should start acting Mrs independent but try and live within his means since you want to hide your money.
your insulted your MIL by ignoring her and expect her to support you.
ogbu nne Di like you.
go and apologize to them and right your wrong.
Women need to use wisdom when dealing with certain issues. First of all, you shouldn’t have practically sponsored your own wedding.
ReplyDeleteSecondly, you should have acknowledged hubby in front of his mom. Never let in laws know when you are fighting. They will take sides.
Thirdly, how much would the clothes have cost?? If you were able to handle other things, you should have simply bought the clothes.
Let your husband know you heard their discussion. Leave it alone and stop digging for clams where there is none.
Na wa ooo..the way people deem some things important baffle me..my baby's naming i wore an old native dress..i wasnt angry..i ddint evwn think of making new dress..dedication we will now buy new dress again?madam,try and manaage what u have.when things fall in place,if he is a good man he will tell people how u stood by him during hard times.God bless the new baby
DeleteQueen and boss, "coman and carry your student oooo"
ReplyDeleteThis is what happens when people wont apply wisdom and sieve thru comments to pick the ones that will be beneficial for them. Just because this poster has always read here that women should not form Miss independent and chose to work with that advise, she has indirectly ignited troubles for herself in her marriage.
Yes, women should not be too independent and allow men carry their responsibilities but my dear poster, your case is very different :
(1) Your hubby doesnt have any money in his account which u are very much aware of
(2) He got a loan from his work place and while trying to multiply the cash(just do he could make u happy in the long run), everything went down the drain via ponzi and till date he's paying back the loan which u are aware of too
(3) You gave birth thru CS and he still went out of his way to borrow money from friends to pay up bills which he still has to refund
And you are still asking him money for clothes......madam, do you want him to steal or rob?
You were very wrong, poster. From ur post, this man does not come across like someone who is stingy. The only thing i dont understand is why this trivial thing has led to ur husband mentioning divorce......u probably have been giving him a very hard time when it comes to finances (judging from ur post). You better make peace with him and calm down or else you will use ur own hands to destroy your home.
Proverbs 14:1 The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down.
DeleteFoolish woman
It is what q&b teaches them in this blog, "not to form Mrs. Independent" (sic). This is the result of selfishness; you were demanding money for new clothes from someone that you know quite well does not have. Someone who was paying back the debt he incurred during your wedding etc. And who told you that after marriage that that money in your account is yours?
I got married more than ten years ago and have never argued with my husband. We have a common account and once any of us withdraw more than 10k from it, it hits the other's mobile device; both venue, item or Atm location/withdrawals etc. I am not Mrs independent. In fact, I am Mrs. dependent; depend on Jesus and my husband. I have peace of mind. I am not writing chronicles.
Please lady, sell that greed and foolishness!
LMAO, How old are you poster. You sound like a teen. If your husband genuinely doesn't have, you can help out especially when it comes to your own personal stuff. BTW, must you wear new clothes? If yes, can't you take little amount from your account and take care of it?
ReplyDeletePoster, you're mean, stingy - Aka gum and wicked. To the extent you cannot cover up for your spouse yet you claim love, buy the clothes for your first child dedication. you were fully aware of his financial status and married him. Not acting Mrs independent does not mean you should be cruel.
ReplyDeleteyou disrespected your mother in law by refusing to greet your husband in her presence even when she told you to do so- seems your arrogant. if he was rich , will you disrespect him.
That how you people will create trouble everywhere when there's no need for it.
Continue giving the devil executive chair in your home then tomorrow you will be the person that will cry later.
Go and settle with them fast and stop being funny.
I know them. All these stingy women that will have and never contribute to their husband.I have some friends like that. They will never spend on themselves. family. Money full account but you and your husband dey suffer?? You knew the poor husband don't have yet you keep asking. You better change.
ReplyDeleteYoruba women don't epp their husband. Madam continue oo. OK.
ReplyDeleteThis is such a ie. if anything, na Yoruba women de hustle pass because most of their men no de send dem and their puking cos dem de born everywhere!! Women taking care of the house, school fees l, everything while the man spends outside
DeleteYou really are stupid poster.See how ull loose your home because of party.you are really shameless .Party will not kill ypu yoruba girls .you knew very well hibby was broke yet you were asking for momey stupidly .Just go amd kneel down and beg .ewu
ReplyDeleteYes poster you overreacted. No third party suppose to know what is going on between you and your husband. You actually knows how much your husband lost and spent, yet you insist on buying new clothes? Nawah for you. Better go and make peace before it's too late.
ReplyDeletei read this blog daily and i always see the ''dont be miss independent comment''. i even saw it b4 i got married but i dont practice all i read here at home. Bc what works for A might not work for B. My husband knows all about my balance and salary. I came into that marriage with all i can give.If tomorrow it end broken atleast i am rest assure i gave my all to make it work. I can never act the way you are acting. Most women make their husband look what they are today. Then when you see the man outside you go crazy over how well groom he is. Do you know what a help mate is ? He will divorce you with your miserable 2 million. Money cant buy happiness. Just be good to your husband and forget all the feminist talk. You are either married or single. Choose one.
ReplyDeletebetter yarn jare...thumbs up
DeletePoster, apply wisdom oh!!!! No go give a.m. all your money oh. You don’t have. You borrowed from a friend to pay back from your salary... or something
DeleteLittle child. You wouldn't be a day older than 21.
ReplyDeleteMust you even do naming ceremony ????? when there is no money. Instead of you to be more concerned about baby food you will soon start buying and diapers. Cloth is your problem.
ReplyDeleteIf you like be listening to blog advice that will advice you to always collect money from your hubby by force. While they are not doing it.
Nothing wrong in cooking a pot of jollof rice with chicken and some soft drink, invite your pastor, both parents and close family, not more than 10 people. is that one not naming ceremony?/? is it not the prayers and giving names that is important. And you and your husband wear any nice outfit you already have.
He did his responsibility which is pay hospital bills. You know the loan is your problem now, when he finishes paying, atleast he has a job, you can now introduce you sharing home expenses till he is stable. That is if he is a hardworking man o.
The situation you are in now, your concern should be welfare of your child and not picking fight over cloth.
Also make sure, you don't over-do in the house. Do the basics so he knows he needs to step-up when he is financially able. Don't let it become a habit, always complain of being broke. But give your child the best and leave luxuries for now. If he wants luxuries, let him buy it.
Madam by the time your husband get a good girl frien who can borrow him money and invest with him without struggle. He will divorce your stingy ass. If you disrecpect his mom like that then you are just not a good wife . what happens to pretending there was no malice in her presence.
ReplyDeleteAfter d babe has invested in him, he will collect her money n take his wife to canada.
DeleteNa today?
Make una dey sponsor man.
I'm sorry madam but you didn't apply wisdom at all. You shouldn't have disrespected your husband before his mother. Nothing wrong in tasking your husband but you're meant to be his help mate. Wisdom my dear is profitable, in all thy dealings, get wisdom. You need to right your wrong by apologizing to both your husband and MIL. PS: don't apply everything you read on this blog. We all come here to have fun.
ReplyDeleteQueen and boss, "coman and carry your student ooo"
ReplyDeleteWhen people read comments here, they do not apply wisdom to pick the one that best suits them. Just because you have read here severally that women should not form miss independent, you have taken urs overboard and u want to use ur hands to destroy ur home.
Yes, i agree that women should not be too independent and allow men to carry their responsibility but your case here differs slightly :
(1) Your husband does not have any money in his account which you are very much aware of,
(2) Your husband took a loan from his workplace and while trying to multiply the cash(probably to please you in the long run), everything went down the drain via ponzi and he is still repaying the loan till date
(3) You gave birth through CS and your husband went as far as borrowing from friends to pay the bills. He has debts to settle aside the loan he is servicing
You knew all these, yet u went ahead to ask him money for clothes.....do you want him to steal or rob for you? Poster, this is pure wickedness on your path!
Your mother in law wont hear all these stated facts and be happy with you. Your husband does not come across as a stingy and/or irresponsible man. My major concern here is why he is quick to talk about divorce cos of this trivial issue(u have probably pushed him to the wall with ur " non miss independent attitude").
Poster, make peace with ur husband and MIL and henceforth,apply wisdom in your marriage. Dont form miss independent and at the same time, dont be wicked by being over dependent.
Let's be gentle with this poster and advice with love. I respect that she told the truth about her actions. Some other posters will come here and paint the story to look like the man and his wife are demons and she is an angel.
ReplyDeleteAt poster, guide your future by imagining your partner doing the same thing to you, blanking you and your mother. How would you feel?
Queen and boss the results of your advise is here. Poster I would divorce you to if I'm your husband because you have no love.
ReplyDeleteStupid anonymous. So I should give all my finances to him to show him love. I know that I was wrong but I was never stingy with my husband.
DeletePoster & anon 18:11, I really understand you. You are not stingy because you take care of the house bills. What you did wrong was how you ignored your man and his mum. You're someone that doesn't know how to pretend that all is well when all isn't actually well. But, you need to start doing that, especially when outsiders are around. Respect your husband in the presence of outsiders. Don't leave a crack on the wall for lizards to enter your matrimonial home.
DeleteYou did no wrong by being dependent. I think what you should have done is to mention it ONCE to your husband's hearing that you needed a cloth. Just once, and you will drop the matter since he doesn't have. Your nag and malice on the cloth have portrayed you in a bad light. Your man may think that you can't endure with him in times of need. He may even hold grudges against you and rub it in your face when things gets better. Then, who will you report him to? Is it the mum that just witnessed this your one mistake? They may even ignore all tbr assistance you have been rendering in the house just because of this one mistake. Do not do one thing that will nullify thousands of your good deeds. I know that you have realized your mistakes and you will make adjustments for future references. Congratulations on the birth of your child.
Why will people start off their marriage on loan? Who does that?(in cee-c's voice) now he'll continue to pay his debts when he should be enjoying his money. O ga ooo.
ReplyDeleteAs for you not greeting ur hubby before your mil,that's extremely wrong. You signed for this when you didn't wait for him to at least have a regular income before marriage.
Shut your fucking mouth up.he has a regular income and our marriage did not start on loan.
DeletePoster you are so rude,no wonder mil is adding kerosene and hubby talking divorce.
DeleteMadam you have over reacted... You should be grateful to God for your new bundle of joy, you can wear other clothes you have and stop acting childish... Keeping malice with your husband.. Even in front of his mother. Please go on your knees and apologize to them.
ReplyDeleteYou are annoying , stupid, wicked, inconsiderate fellow that was you are. You are heartless, stubborn.
ReplyDeleteHe will hammer with a powerful job and he will send you packing without your baby then you will know what miserable life you have.What is 2 mil? Because you havent seen money before that is why you are acting stupid and annoying. Can you imagine her comment? Shaking head at iya? I will deal with you and you will be so sorry for your miserable and wasteful life. olode. omo ole
Madam your advice is in your right-up,how can you vidate that he doesn't have money while asking him for money?maybe you wanted him to borrow more money from his colleague to buy naming attire!!!!
ReplyDeleteThis woman is a joker ..You know your husband doesn’t have and you r stressing him this much and from your write up we can see he is trying his best ,so what exactly is your problem ,must you do a big naming ceremony ,can’t you make do with what you have and just do something simple ..The most important thing is for you to pray for that child not invite ppl who don’t even like you for the naming ..you better grab sense and stop acting like a child they refuse to give sweet
ReplyDeletePoster pls stop taking all the advice you read here. How can u be asking from someone who doesn't
ReplyDeleteHave. Ignoring your mil was so wrong of you.during my baby's dedication I bought for the self and hubby. It did not kill me.
Dear poster you where wrong in all ramifications.. When you know your hubby doesn't have money in his account is different from him having and not willing to spend on you or the house... I'll advice you go on your knees nd beg for forgiveness from birth of them and stop been proud.. Pride is the number killer.
ReplyDeleteThank you. I have done that.
DeletePoster I saw your comment where you said your MIL asked you to wear a new cloth, you should have agreed with her and gone ahead to wear what you have.Weldone for providing for the home like you said.
ReplyDelete2ndly you were wrong not to have greeted your hubby and even when his mum told you to. From your post it's seems your still a child. It's good to save your money and demand from hubby but it should be from a hubby that has nu. Learn to be considerate okay.
Apologise to the both of them, don't beat yourself too hard, the deed has been done. But please learn not to disrespect your husband in the presence of pple especially his family. Go your sins are forgiven😆😆😆
Congratulations on the safe delivery of your baby.I think you should have bought your naming ceremony clothe before delivery and if there was no enough cash,wear what you have.If you are Yoruba,you can wear your traditional outfit, wear it without the aso oke and use another gele.No matter the situation,don't give room for in laws,your husband will forget about the issue but in laws won't forget.
ReplyDeleteIt'll be fine poster.
ReplyDeletePoster many women provide for their home and don't complain. Knowing your husband has money you should not have asked for money for clothe or even gotten angry when he got angry. Ignoring him in the presence of his mother was wrong. Your husband is in debt and you want to buy clothes for naming. If your marriage breaks up today you will cry foul. You better apologize to your husband and start behaving like an adult before you get into even more trouble
ReplyDeletePoster is a clueless, stingy lady, must you party?
ReplyDeleteStupid woman
ReplyDeleteIt is what q&b teaches them in this blog, "not to form Mrs. Independent" (sic). This is the result of selfishness; you were demanding money for new clothes from someone that you know quite well does not have. Someone who was paying back the debt he incurred during your wedding etc. And who told you that after marriage that that money in your account is yours?
I got married more than ten years ago and have never argued with my husband. We have a common account and once any of us withdraw more than 10k from it, it hits the other's mobile device; both venue, item or Atm location/withdrawals etc. I am not Mrs independent. In fact, I am Mrs. dependent; depend on Jesus and my husband. I have peace of mind. I am not writing chronicles.
Please lady, sell that greed and foolishness!
You are the stupid one. @anon18.04. What works for you mustn't work for everyone else ode
DeleteWhen they said "don't form independent woman" they didn't mean that you should keep asking your husband for money even when you know he's in debt o. If you have the money to buy the cloth why bother your husband to go and borrow? Poster borrow sense o.
ReplyDeleteMisplaced priority poster. When I birth we used our old cloths that are nice for naming. My engagement cloth i wore and my huaband wore the one for thsnaksgiving. We still looked nice. It's good to be contented. Poster pray for contentment and try and help ypur husband u might not tell him exactly what you have in cash but just do the needful. You can buy foodstuff for the house and your baby food. After all na the both of u dey inside d marriage and at the end na wife dey face everything when wahala comes. Ypur in-laws can even say na u bring bad leg come make their son broke. Please be wise. À proverbs 31 woman helps her husband not marr him
ReplyDeleteThis poster sha get mouth and sounds arrogant. Must you respond to every comment that does not go down well with u?? Looks like u really not opened to advice and u have made up ur mind on what u want to hear. You need maturity and humility first seriously
ReplyDeleteWhat are you all freaking telling me...Didn't MIL quarrel with her own husband. MIL shouldn't have asked the obvious. poster you also did right by asking him for money. Didn't he know what he was entering? I know you asked for the money just for asking sake. He should have been man enough not involve his mother even when she wanted to nose around. The deed has been done, please try and make peace with hubby and tell him your mind when the dust settles. As for MIL, be as wise as the serpent. That one wants you to drop dead, asking you to get back to work after c/section. Who does that. Be smart next time. There would always be one. Cheers
ReplyDeleteAnon18.04 you haven't quarreled with your husband is that marriage
ReplyDeletePoster.....I pray God gives you wisdom to manage your home. God bless your new baby and may he be a blessing to your family, Amen
ReplyDeleteI think saying the poster is wicked is a bit much. His family wanted ceremony and since she has been carrying the household who knows where the money is by now. I kinda get why she did it, though an unwise move on her part. However, sometimes God uses the foolish things to teach us wisdom. I am kinda glad she did what she did, because she sees the family she has married into. Why would a Mil not discourage her son from speaking of divorce and taking a newborn from their mother for a simple issue like this? Why would a Mil even instigate shit by asking if she won't greet her husband. That Mil is a firestarter and troublemaker and should be handled very carefully. Why did hubby have to report any of this to his mother? If he truly loved you he would cover your shame and flaws, not announce them to his family. Now that his mother knows everyone will know.
ReplyDeletePoster, since you have already apologized be wise as a serpent and harmless as a Dove. Do not spend out all the money because if he is already speaking divorce and taking the baby from you then you need to shine your eyes. A man newly married with a newborn should not be speaking of such over something like this. What will he do when real problems come up. If you are a costly wife he should have picked up someone on his own level to marry. Is it your fault he is not gainfully employed. How women date unemployed men is a mystery to me, if you lack a job why do you even want a relationship, shouldn't your first priority be finding work? Honestly, it wasn't even that big of an issue, he simply says he doesn't have it, why did it go so far? Why is his mother saying you are lazy? I beg you please take over the primary care of your child and do your household duties. If she is there to assist you with the baby, please do your due so she doesn't have these things to say about you. Now, I am not saying you should not allow her time with her grandchild, I am saying do not be dependent on her to assist you with anything, because she is calling you lazy! If you need help get your own mother or a mature woman from your own kin to come stay with you. Please keep your thoughts and opinions to yourself and show a cheerful face always. Just take the eye opener for what it is and adjust yourself. Most importantly, seek wisdom while it can still be found.
This is tje best comment so far. That mil and his son are very wicked.
DeleteBest comment so far. I totally agree with you anon 00:52
DeletePoster sha take am easy. respect your husband always afterall you accepted to marry him knowing fully well that he is broke. as for me a small wedding with few family and friends will do it for me. no debt or borrowing to do wedding. for wetin naw?
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