Oh Dear!.....
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
SCAR FACE
I'm regular bvs but I hardly comment because my phone has been damaged,so I used my big sisters phone to send this email.she also a Bvs. I will like to seek advice of fellow bvs and Stella your red pen is also needed.
Pls hide my details.don't mind my typing errors as I am in tears writing this now. I'm 23 years old girl from delta state,I had an accident when I was a 2year old baby which caused a scar on my face and people look down on me due to my predicament.
I met a guy 2 years ago,who I thought he will help out of my depression but I was wrong,there was a day we went out together to have a nice time but he turned it to a bad day for me lo and behold before I could know it he had already bath me with his drink.
There was a day we went down the street to buy beans cake(akara) he used it to burn my mouth. There was one certain day he came to my friend's house and told her he doesn't need me that he was just after my money; he didn't know I was there then,I heard everything he said to her and I ran to my house crying bitterly I was confused.
I called him to let him know that i heard everything he said to my friend and he said I should take a look at myself in mirror that I won't find someone that will marry me with my condition.
He later broke up with me but now he sent a lot of people to beg me,should I accept him or not?Stella,this is my pics below for your eyes alone.
*This Chronicle made me shed tears....your scars are horrific.what kind of accident was that that did this to you?Oh Dear God!.
As for that guy,please baby girl,do not accept him back...stay away from people who try to bring you down with words....when you find someone who loves you just the way you are,he will protect you with his words and not give you more scars emotionally.
You are probably in an environment that Judges people by their looks but i would like you to know that you will be fine...
I wish i could post your photos for you to get better advice....Try to get a wig that has fringes in front or with Bob hairstyle and wear so that it will give you a better look,stop tying your head,wear a little make up if you can and find your self confidence woman.OK?
DO NOT ACCEPT THAT MAN BACK PLEASE HE IS AN UGLY MONSTER...and stop giving any man you meet the little money you have,you cannot buy love darling.
I hope my advice helped you because words fail me cos I am blinded by rage and tears.
Poster I agree with what Stella said. If you dont love yourself, nobody will love you like you do. I know you are feeling low but I think there are ways to correct this.
ReplyDeleteIt is through plastic surgery. Surgeries have been doing wonders to people, if you have money please go for it.
Dont let any idiot to bring you down. That man or boy is a LOSER. A BIGGER FOOL AND AN IDIOT.
If you are still hurt, better send guys to deal with his fuck up. Nobody needs to know, only you. Please be happy with your self Inugo
Poster if handicap can get loved why won't u... Sweetie if u love urself even with d scar u still do shakara... Some men likes women not cos de ate beautiful but cos of self confidence.. My dear bring urself high love ur self cos nobody will love u the way u want.
DeleteIf Kechi Okwuchi the Sosoliso plane crash survivor and an America's Got talent finalist can rise against all odds so can you. She wears her scars with so much grace that you can't help but admire her. Kill such people with your success!
DeletePoster. I am handicapped (although I don't see myself as such). I also had an accident when I was about 5 with 2 damaged legs.my secondary school days was terrible because someone would always insult my legs. I used to hate myself till I got into the university.
DeleteI realized that only educatiou would take me places and I won't rely on any man for love.
O yes! I read up to my masters level. And when a guy gives me attitude I bullshit him.
I am married with three wonderful kids all vaginal birth o.
Why this story babe? Pick up your self esteem and do things that will add value to you. Trust me you won't even notice that scar. I even forget about my legs.
You need self love hun.
Babe have you seen the trending photos of a dwarf that just got married? I tell you, nothing do you.
ReplyDeleteNa nigerian?
DeleteNigerian men select alot, them never marry the complete women finish, she might be lucky sha..
Maama's was their favorite rendevous spot. 8pm and they were sitting across the table, facing each other, both of them too eager to get words off their chest.
Delete"Ed, I am still trying to understand why you would choose me. Look at me. No man would want to be with me!" Steph said, gesticulating at the same time.
"What lies has the devil been feeding you with?" Ed asked as he smiled calmly.
"How do you mean?" His question was deep and threw her off balance.
"You know, sometimes the devil feeds us with lies like 'you are incompetent' , 'you are not beautiful', 'Who would love you this way?' but truth is beauty transcends beyond what we see physically. Beauty is in the heart and that’s the beauty you carry inside Steph. That's the beauty I have seen these few months of closely associating with you."
Her eyes widened with disbelief. Did she hear well?
"For a little over six months, I have worked closely with you Steph and I had come to encounter the real you - the person you are on the inside. And this is what I have found: you are the most amazing, the most beautiful woman I have ever met. While most women pay more attention to their superficial qualities you pay more attention to your inner self, your person, your character. Everyday I wake up, I realize how much I want to be with you, to spend time with you and then it clicked - I wanted more than to spend a few paltry number of times with you; I want to spend the rest of my life with you! I couldn’t believe myself initally but itis what it is. I can't deny the feelings I have for you no matter how much I try. Have I prayef on it? Yes, I have and I even all the more convinced.
So Steph, I didn't just fall in love with your looks, I fell in love with your personality. That's the kind of love that runs deeper!"
By the time he was done talking, both their eyes were moist. Steph quickly rose up and embraced him, her tears finally flowing freely.
"Oh Ed! I never for once wouldbelieve that something like this would ever happen to me. I have looked down on my self because of my physical deformity without recognizing that God has equipped me and is still equipping me with a deeper kind of beauty. It took you to make me realize this truth and I embrace it. I choose to love myself and stop feeling sorry about me or constantly blame anyone for it. Everything works together for our good whether good or bad."
"I am glad you see that now. Don't ever let the devil put you down. You are fearfully and wonderfully made," Ed said, obviously delighted as he. . .
Mitchelleobatu.blogspot.com
👏👏👏 nice one Michelle!
DeleteOh dear, stop crying dear. God will wipe away your tears. The guy is a beast. Please don't accept him back. Can you make yourself happy and forget about men for now. Your man will come at the appointed time. Can I tell you? You have to love and make yourself happy first before waiting on anyone to do that for you. I love you girl.
ReplyDeletePoster place don't carry again, follow Stella's advice. You will get someone who will even love you. Raise your head up high dear.
DeleteDearest poster. Jesus loves you the way you are. Accept Him and you would glow within even with scars. He has created a special man for you who would love you beyond those scars. Yours is just a physical scar. The blind, deaf, crippled find love and get married. Love yourself. Love would find you.
ReplyDeleteMy dear it is well with you,self confidence is what you actually need now,build your self confident,see yourself as the best,the most beautiful,love yourself,regard yourself,and watch how people will regard you.please as stella said money cannot buy love,stop giving guys your money,and most especially do not accept the guy back,he is a user he will only cost you more pain.
DeleteStella has said it all....just be yourself and live life to the fullest....I beg of thee.... do not take that guy back
ReplyDeleteThere's a doctor in Lagos who helps people get rid of tribal marks etc via scar revision laser technology. Perhaps, you should contact him he might consider some charitable cases. Google Grandville.
ReplyDelete"...You are fearfully and wonderfully made," Ed said, obviously delighted as he stroked the little of her back.
DeleteOnce again he dropped on his knees and asked her again,
"Steph, will you do me the honor of being my wife, spending the rest of your life with me and being the mother of my children?"
"Yes, yes!" She screamed excitedly and her answer was met with resounding claps all across the room. Steph was so shocked. She just realized the people around had been watching their emotional episode closely. She and Ed had been so engrossed in their emotional moment they didn't realize they were attracting a lot of attention.
Ed slid the ring unto her finger and the deal was sealed with a kiss.
"And about your face, that’s something a good plastic surgeon can fix, don't you think? And even without a plastic surgery, you still are beautiful in my eyes my love, " Ed quipped in the middle of all the excitement.
With her heart brimming with so much joy and love for this man, she threw her head back and laughed as they made there way out of the eatery into the waiting arms of the night.
END
*Moral of the story*: Your true beauty lies in your character. Build it. Work on it. Physical beauty without character means nothing.
Don't look down on yourself. Love yourself irrespective of your past or how how you look. Don't ever let the devil put you down and make you think less of yourself.
Mitchelleobatu.blogspot.com
👏👏👏 well done Michelle.
DeleteThe man is not only insolent but violent; using "akara" to burn your face? The same face?
ReplyDeletePlease forgive him in your heart but do not have anything to do with him.
Love is not selfish or insolent.
Exactly!
DeleteDon't accept that idiot back... God will give you someone that will cherish you for who you are....
ReplyDeleteU will be fine poster!
DeleteNo no and never do not try it ooo. Please my sister God will send u another man
ReplyDelete...i can smell the stench of low self esteem from her, she'd most likely behave like men are doing her a huge favour being in her life, and men can smell desperation miles away like shark senses blood... she should work on herself from the inside, its so sad that her beauty lies within, and she'd keep running into ppl that have ugliness within their hearts, i havnt walked an inch in her shoes but i know its not easy cus society will judge you even b4 u open ur mouth, job hunting will even be limited to her reach!
DeleteShe requires alot of self confidence, hope and "hyped" self esteem.
I love you ❤️
ReplyDeleteI love you ❤️
I love you ❤️
You deserve happiness and joy and it’ll come in due time. For now, make yourself happy, improve on your appearance as much as you can. Learn makeup and use good perfumes. Also develop your personality and focus on making money. Don’t go back to that man no matter what, your man will come.
My dear why are you dulling and subjecting yourself to emotional abuse? Please save up for plastic surgeries. They are now available in Nigerian, even laser treatments too. Work hard and save up for them. If God blesses you with someone that appreciates you that way along the line, thank Him. If you have to reach your destination before you can date, please do. Write a journal/diary about how you feel everyday, and focus on more important things like making money and being healthy. One day you will tell a Story to motivate young girls going through image issues/body scarring issues. If kechi okwuchi can be in Nigeria flying her flag, how much more you?
ReplyDeletePlease let's learn to turn our tests to testimonies. Enough of the victim playing and whining. It doesn't change anything it just magnifies it.
Good luck!
Lol babe I have not commented on any of ur post.. Nor hv I called ur name b4... But just know I can hug u for this comment.. It's true she needs to channel that energy somewhere useful
DeleteChikito, did you really type this? What! Somebody must have used your phone. For the first time in your post,no " I, me, my, mine...". Wow! You had the milk of kindness for once not to make it all about you. I like this part of you. Keep it up babe. I might get to fall in love with you afterall.
Delete@17:07 yes oh, na me. Even though i dont need your fake anonymous love. Mnwh, Where did you fall from to know that I cut your type of most of my juicy gists? 😋😋😋
Delete@ladybird 😉😉😉
Hmmmm.... We all carry burdens, either physical or spiritual. May u find happiness, forget abt dating for now, learn to be happy and love you self
ReplyDeleteEeh yah!!!!
ReplyDeletePoster plz follow Stella's advice. Love yourself inugo? Love will find you. The blind,physically challenged etc. get married everyday so chill!!!
RUN 🏃 FROM THAT MAN!!!, HE DOESN'T LOVE YOU.
You didn't burn yourself so rise above it. Stay focused on your studies if you are still a student. And if you've graduated, still futher your studies. One day you will meet true love. If you can afford reconstructive surgery,then go for it.
ReplyDeleteTIE YOUR LEGS! TIE YOUR LEGS!!!!
There guys who know you will have self esteem issues because of your scar. All they want to do is prey on you, cos they know you are desperate.
TIE YOUR LEGS!!!
I felt bad reading this chronicle. My dear, you need to love yourself first and any other person's opinion does not count.
ReplyDeleteI don't know why people will prefer to judge outwardly without considering the inward beauty. You are a queen, raise your head high up and keep soaring high. Nothing do you my dear. Also get your self good wigs just as stella said.
As for that guy, do not accept him back because he will not change but only after your money. He does not value or respect you so do not accept him back.
God will surprise you. A crippled lady got married to a tall handsome man that even straight girls have not gotten. and the man adores her like queen. Yours will come. Relax.
Awwww this chronicle touched me. Baby girl dont be sad and dont accept him back. Work on yourself first by loving yourself the way you are. Channel your energy to other things, be the best in your field or grow your business to a multimillion dollar biz and see people fawning over you. They wont remember seeing a scar on your face. Mix with positive minded people and not people who will make you feel inferior.
ReplyDeleteI have a couple of scars too but i dont let the scars define me.
You'll be fine dear
cry not baby girl. love will find you one day and you'll have a Cinderella story. boost your self confidence and walk with grace and splendour, people will deal with you judging from how you carry yourself. drop the pity party and enjoy life even though I know it's not easy to overlook a scar that's staring you in the face every morning. Remember that those already in the grave will exchange your scar and more just to have their life back if given the option. life sucks already and is too short to be wallowing in self pity. buy that make-up and wig and give yourself small swagger. kisses to you
ReplyDeletepardon typos
Please check up the girl that survived the sosoliso air crash, Cnt remember her name now, she was also in a singing competition recently and learn from her. Brace up. Get your confidence back, speak to yurslf through the mirror that dude asked you to Check and tell yourself you are beautiful and will make something out of your self. Love you.
ReplyDeleteEhen????????? Accept what back? Girl are you okay? Is your head in place? Accept kini? Jesu! Olorun sa nu a. What did I just read?? Please get you some self esteem! Girl go check out women on IG that have burn scars from head to toe. These women have partners and have babies. Your scars cannot be as bad as theirs.Any man that doesn't accept you and your scars is not worth your time! My sister has an issue. She smells. Its a gentic disorder. She has mutation in certain genes and this causes her body not to process certain proteins in foods. Girl my sister is younger than I am and she is married with 2 kids! She is her husband's world! Their union is so enviable I sometimes wonder how two people can be so compatible. She had men who almost destroyed her self esteem but she did not allow them. She kept her standard and improved what she could. She met her match and worth and they have a beautiful family. Sister girl do not go back to a person who does not value your person but see only your physical scars. Do not!
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing
DeleteNever forget what you are, the rest of the world wouldnt, wear it like an armour and it can never be used to hurt you -Tyrion Lannistar
ReplyDeleteOh my game of thrones... I love tyrion
DeleteI think these are the words he told Jon Snow, Stark's bastard.
DeleteRun away from that excuse of a man, if not...very soon he will bath you with hot cooking oil, even acid!
ReplyDeleteFollow stella advice Stay away from people who try to bring you down with word.
ReplyDeleteEnter your comment...baby girl, be yourself esctatically, forget about the people that made you feel bad. you will surely see your soul, dont be in a haste. Good luck, dear.
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry to read about your scar. I know how those things try to reduce your self esteem. Take Stella's advice and more. Build up your self esteem whichever way u can
ReplyDeleteAnd if u can afford it, go for the plastic surgery.
But as far as that guy is concerned 'NEVER' go back to him. He not only doesn't love you, he's disgusted by you. Delete his number. Insult people that continuously try to make u take him back (they will stop).
And from the bottom of my heart, I hope you find someone that loves u so much u forget all the pains you've been through
'your scars are horrific.' Very insensitive of you stella. hiss
ReplyDeleteYou can start a go fund me and see if you'll raise money for plastic surgery. First find a surgeon and find out how much then put the word out
ReplyDeleteStella how can you tell her her scars look horrific! How's that meant to console her???
ReplyDeleteSo sorry lady,let the man go!
ReplyDeleteleave him alone. Save up so you can do skin graft.it maybe expensive o but it can go along way .
ReplyDeleteI know how you feel. I haven't walked in your shoes, but I can relate.
ReplyDeleteI have never really mentioned this to anybody, but I guess I would spill it here once.
I struggle with my self Image occasionally. I have a very beautiful elder sister and when people see her, they get disappointed when they see me; I'm no beauty compared to my elder sister. One day after her friend saw me, he asked her," Why is your sister soooooooooooooooooooooo different". my sister told him " because people are different". She never knew I overheard that conversation.
Let me tell you my dissatisfaction with myself:
1. I have Big lips; I feel my lips are big for my face. people used to actually call me nicknames that depicts one with big lips. My lips are not so big, but I would have loved them smaller. One day a neigbour had the guts to ask me "if my lips were too heavy for me when I brush". I was stupid enough to answer.
2. I am quite slim; though not too slim: i feel like i do not have adequate ass and boobs. Though my ass and boobs are okay sha.
Not many men ask me out.
I appear as a very self confident person; I don't allow people treat me less than I deserve. Sometimes I am actually very self confident. I am smart, outspoken and highly intelligent; these things attract people to me and cause people to listen to me when I speak.
I currently do have a boyfriend, but my "secret self esteem issues" is making me ruin the relationship". I ask myself, "why does a guy this cute want to be with me? has he seen my lips and face at all? Sometimes my insecurities just make me doubt that anyone would truly want to be with me. My boyfriend doesn't know I have such insecurities, I don't think anyone knows. I conceal it so weeeellllllllll, so much so that people love my self esteem and carriage. I walk like I'm the most beautiful girl in the room, I talk with so much authority and confidence, I make it clear to men who walk into my life that i deserve the best and would settle for nothing else. Men love a confident woman: i project that often.
Sometimes i get sad and hard broken; but at such times i pick myself up and encourage myself too.
My friends say I am too tough on men and with men; I know I am- what can I do, I wonder why they want to be with me sometimes, men who stick around despite that earn my love and loyalty.
I sometimes have challenges with taking pictures; I hate taking pictures, but sometimes i have to, I am always bothered about how I would look in the pictures; sometimes they come out looking great, at some other times, they don't.
I know my looks are not flawless, but I do know know I am beautiful, there are days I see it. So I have identified my selling point: I am smart, Confident, I Speak well, I have a good body, sometimes I have the right attitude.
Basically, I might not be the most beautiful, But I don't let that keep me from living.
I hope you don't let that scar keep you from living to.
Men perceive low self esteem from a distance and they will deal with you when they perceive it. May God help you.
A thousand likes to this comment!
Delete...very similar to what i typed up there.
DeleteThanks for sharing anon.
DeleteCar accident from Akure to Lagos
ReplyDeleteIt is well with u my dear. Please don't be too hard on yourself. Someone who will truly love you for who u are will definitely come ok. Just relax and love yourself more. Don't give any guy ur money, it won't make them stay. As for ur ex, please don't go back to that guy. Cos believe me he will do worse things to u.
ReplyDeleteDon't have anything to say about that guy but you , if you remember the Sosoliso crash survivor you will know your case is different. Thank God for life and love your self. I have a friend who had abscess when she was 2 which affected her leg,one leg is longer than the other but she's got the confidence of 6 people, she walks with Shakira and you won't even notice the defect even with heels
ReplyDeleteSPOT ON
ReplyDeleteAny man that cannot accept you the way you are,has no business being in your life,had this guy, he has not met before judging by the pics he saw, thought I will take shit because he stays in Europe, I deleted and block his number because it affected my self esteem, he has been disturbing me on fb I no send again, although I am single ATM,but will rather be than to allow anyman make me question my self worth, appreciate yourself so that others can follow the trend.
ReplyDelete👏👏👏 nice one!
DeleteStella it's unfortunate she said you shouldn't post her pic that would have allow one to see how she looks and advise her accordingly.
ReplyDeleteNotwithstanding, poster one thing you should always know is that, you are beautiful and wonderfully made by God Himself so, don't allow anybody talk down on you or tell you what is contrary to what God has said concerning you.
Fine you had an accident and that affected your looks, that's good that shows you weren't born that way, tomorrow you can be a healthy woman travel to a country of your choice and get the scar worked on.
As for that scumbag, stay away from him as far as you can. From now onword,anybody that tries to talk down on you base on your looks, sweetheart cut off such a person from your life. You don't need toxic people around you.
Enough of it.
Build your self confident.
Apply some makeup if you can't, go on YouTube to have some lessons. Makeup kits are to be use by ladies, they aren't meant for guys or for fashion shows so go out there, get one and apply on yourself.
Be a good girl.
It’s not going to be an easy journey. First you must learn to love yourself and leave behind those who pull you down.
ReplyDeleteBe the best you can and go for plastic surgery if you can afford it. The results might not be astounding but it could help you look better.
Leave behind that twat! Love will find you
Poster, just love yourself and follow Stella's advise.
ReplyDeletePoster.....please try and love yourself with all your issues and before you know it someone will find you worthy to love. You will be fine dear.....
ReplyDeleteShalom Blac, a Nigerian Youtuber living in LA, the city of vain people and plastic surgery. She hasn't let her scars affect her. She goes on sponsored trips, posts videos and suite active on Social Media.
ReplyDeleteLearn to love yourself dear, no one else will love you like you. For now, try and build your confidence, live your life and experience new things. You are just existing now and not living. Stop letting your scars define you. Start saving money for plastic surgery. They do amazing work in South Korea, Turkey, Colombia, USA with different price points. Some surgeons do pro bono work. Get on Instagram and search plastic surgery pages, follow them and email as much as you an. Maybe someonewill notice you fly you over for free surgery.
Accept who you are, be proud of yourself, Cary yourself high, do not accept that fool, never to accept a man that abuse your emotions. Move on with your life, if possible change environment.
ReplyDeleteYou will be fine, just get over that guy
ReplyDeleteI've not seen anybody on this earth that doesn't lack one thing or the other we can deny it all we want. How we go about it is another ball game altogether. All I can say is don't let anyone treat you like trash. Learn to love yourself first. He burnt your mouth with akara, said stupid things about you and you ask if you should take him back? You deserve better. You are alive that's huge. Since he talked about your money, you are not broke so work towards a plastic surgery if it bothers you too much.
ReplyDeletewhat you see in the mirror is not not your real beauty, it's just the surface of your face. Your real beauty lies within you and that is what you should focus on.
ReplyDeleteMy humble opinion: forget about that incomplete human being. Love yourself and build self confidence. You don't even need to hide the scars, let the man that will marry you accept you the way you are. You can do plastic surgery thereafter. There is a purpose for your scars.
Let's assume you had the accident after marriage and happened to have married that same guy. He would have left you at a time you needed him most.
You are beautiful! Always carry that consciousness above what people feel or think about you.