STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
STINGY/WICKED OLDER SIBLING
Hello
whenever I See siblings helping each other it always makes me happy and sad.
my elder sister is very comfortable, and can help her younger ones, but she will always give excuses anytime we need her help, she always calls me, but anytime I talk about my joblessness, she laughs it off.
Hello
whenever I See siblings helping each other it always makes me happy and sad.
my elder sister is very comfortable, and can help her younger ones, but she will always give excuses anytime we need her help, she always calls me, but anytime I talk about my joblessness, she laughs it off.
I told her I need 200k to start business, she said she too is broke o, that infact the money she and the kids wants to use and go to US for vacation is borrowed, even if it's true, can't she just help me out of it, this is someone working in a big company, infact my friends used to tell me I'm lucky to have such a big sis.
I just laughed.
I cried throughout yesterday nite, this is someone that I was staying with after graduation, did all manner of jobs for her, mind you she didn't contribute a penny to my education. infact she always says I'm her kids mom, cos I was the one that took care of the four of them from birth, she discarded me when they were old enough, infact her husband's people always prays for me...
Now that I need her help she turned her back on me, and she is the only sis I have, I begged her to help me or my husband who is also a graduate get a job, she refused, and she is helping outsiders, on her street in Lagos they always hail her, cos she pays some of these people kids school fees and I borrowed to pay for my own, every year during my birthday she will put up my pics and shower praises on me, making people to believe she like me.
I'm just sad.i know she doesn't owe me anything, but is it good for one's sis to have and not help her younger one?
I have tears in my eyes writing this. I'm suffering and she doesn't seem to care, last time I visited her I saw how my sister spends money on unnecessary things.its well. Anytime she calls and I asked something from her she will not call me for a while, and after sometime she will start calling as if nothing happened, she can call me everyday to gossip, but once I talk about my needs, she disappears..
This is someone I respect a lot the way I talk to her will make someone think she's my mother ,there was a time I visited her AND we were to go to her in-laws place, and she said my shoes are not good enough, she gave me one of her sandals since we use the same size, can you believe she collected the sandal back when we returned?
Hubby has told m not to ask her for anything again, that he knows very soon God will bless us too. But it's painful ,anytime there is need for any family expenses, she will call to tell my husband to pay my own part ,though hubby is managing somewhere, but the pay is not enough to meet the family demand, I don't know if I should just look into her eyes once and tell her how I feel, and cut off from her or should continue gisting like all is well,, and bottle up the pain?
*WICKED SIBLING!!!---My dear you dont need to even face her to tell her,send her a message telling her your mind and cut off from her please...when she realises that having and not giving to someone who was there for you is wrong.I am sure she will contact you....
Wickedness!...She doesnt owe you anything but from what you narrated,she is wicked.Some people have ten kobo and share it with their siblings,come on!!!
You took care of her kids and still you dont know her mumu button? Na wa for you. She does not owe you anything and she also owe you too.
ReplyDeleteI am sure she is not in her right senses. Na this kind one person go talk say she don use your destiny so to help is like giving you back her your destiny.
Instead of crying why dont you put everything into prayers to God Almighty and let God change her heart towards you. I am sure something is not right at all.
It is well
Poster, don't always think the way you are. What if her wealth is blood money and she will be doing you bad by giving it to you? She may be depressed that she can't give you her money cos no normal sibling wull be enjoying while another is suffering. Send her a link to this post
DeleteMaybe she is using her sister's luck to shine.
DeletePlease let us be mindful of our comments on Chronicle because you don't know how the poster feels to send this write up. Which one be mumu button and blood money. Madam Stella's red pen is final here. Poster if she is ur blood sister the same mama and papa kindly send a detailed message to her on WhatsApp to express ur feelings, don't hide words and be open enough is enough u can't be dying in silence. Then cut off all communications with her if she doesn't change. From ur narration ur sis has a well paid job which shows its not blood money. Moreover, u didn't mention her husband's status (rich or poor) for us to know the bread winner of the family. Ur husband is on point, stick to his advice and carry on with ur life. It is well with you.
DeleteThis post reminds me of my aunt, an angel outside, attending to the needs of others but her family. Like you rightly said, she owes you nothing, tru and move on with your life and gain your own ground, create space for your sef, be hard to get, she should just call you at anytime, be busy and not readily available for her exploitations. God ll open doors for you but you have to start somewhere, find a job no matter how small, save and start the business's you desire. Build your own empire and help others. Thank you
DeleteCall her for a meeting,sit her down and tell her your mind and walk away. Cut her off entirely from your life. She owes u nothing but helping outsiders pay school fees when her own sisters borrows money to pay for her kids is WICKEDNESS!!!
ReplyDeleteWhy are you still picking her calls? How can I be hungry and have energy to gossip, please tell her your mind face to face, let her know she's worse than the devil then cut her off, please look for a job, even if it's a sales girl job.
DeleteThis life is funny especially when she calls you for help but have never helped back, please cut her off, that's why I love my family, if you do anyhow it's not easy to be cut off
There are so many people like your sister and the best way to deal with them is to stay away from them and double your efforts in making a living.
ReplyDeleteThere's nothing you'd say to her that she doesn't already know, what she'd use as her reason would be that "I worked hard to make a living, no mother, father, or sister helped me when I was struggling and I made it on my owm".
Darling, kill her with your success. Just like your husband said, let her be and stop disturbing her. It's painful but that is how life is. When she finds out you are successful, she'd come looking for you for help.
"darling kill her with your success"...women..you now making it look like a competition..lol..poster should work hard..no one owes her anything..if she succeeds.,good for her..n her sucess if for her alone and her family.
DeleteYou really know the. Your second paragraph is 👌
DeleteI know one like that. She will telk her siblings how she came to lag without anyone's help and all.
Let her be. Don't ask her for anything again
Do not keep away from her.
ReplyDeleteDo not "gossip" either.
Just be a little bit quiet.
Do not tell her your needs
Tell God your needs and cry before God not a human.
2 Cor. 4:18
So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.
He wasn't buoyant from birth; was she?
Your sister does not owe you anything! Relatives who feel entitled just piss me off You went to school, chose to marry a brokeass, went ahead to have children you ain't in a position to cater for. Leave your sister alone and carry your load by yourself. You have painted her in such bad light to favour your narrative but I am sure she has helped you in the past but since you couldn't improve yourself, she has washed her hands off you. I have lazy relatives like you who think I came to earth to carry their load. I don jump them pass after they wasted all my efforts on them.
ReplyDeleteI pity your siblings,I hope they never get to need a pin from you,I know your type.
DeleteYou're such an evil person. I hope you're an island that doesn't ask for help. Cos if you do, you're a bloody hypocrite.
DeleteYou think you've made it in life? I used to have this mentality but God humbled me. I know what it is to have and beg and not be given. We are given to give. Bless others with your own blessings. It's not your business how the spend the money. Just play your part and give the little you can. No man is an island ooo..and even if you have many friends, they can't replace family
DeleteWork hard, do good, serve God. That way you won't beg for bread. As for you pitying your generation, my siblings are all doing well and we weren't bred to depend on others. If I need to execute a project and I need a loan from my sibling, I pay back with interest! We roll like that. No agreement signed, just common sense that you have to work hard to live the good life.
Delete@kikki, u are right with ur point. But there are some siblings that don't want their sisters or brothers to make it in life. They want them to always come to them for help. So don't say all siblings are like that cos they asked for help.
DeleteI hope we are not namesakes because you are wicked.
DeleteSounds somehow. Are you sure this story isn't half?
DeleteShe doesn't want you to be greater than her,that's just it...she wants you to always beg her when she knows she won't give you.. Overlook her and stay on ur own. Your miracle is around the corner
ReplyDeleteI am the last child of my parent and married, i have four elder one, yet i take full responsibility of my elder sister's family as she is a primary school teacher and her husband whom we all told her not to marry has no job and refuse to work, but i overlooked her mistakes and still cater for her. She does not appreciate anything i do for her, but that has not stopped me from helping her and her family. No sister or brother will watch another suffer, no matter what. She is wicked and derives pleasure in your suffering. Stop begging her and face your front. All it takes its time, things will surely be ok last last.
ReplyDeleteGod bless you and keep blessing you ma
Deletemy elder sister married a broke ass and irresponsible man. I love my sister to bits. she hates to tell you her situation but I do force her to talk and help her whenever I can. I support everything and I do this with all my other sisters even though I'm the youngest. As a helper you will know when you are doing the right thing and when you are being taken for granted. Poster it's either your sister is stingy, into something or has a problem with your husband that you are not telling but all the same you can't force her to do for you. Try to concentrate on yourself and work a bit harder and pray for God to help you out of your situation. I personally don't feel anybody owe me anything in this life.
DeleteSo many people are like that. They even block outsiders from helping you because outsiders will think that you don't need help since you have someone like that. Tell her your mind dear but don't be rude about it. Then cut her off and hustle on your own. God will see you through. Treat her as if she doesn't exist self.
ReplyDeleteMy dear, I agree with your husband. You will be doing too well by even sending her a text that you are cutting her off. Just disconnect qnd don't let her know what you are up to. She will look for you when the time come. This happened to me. I just disconnected and worked like a horse, my husband and I. Less than 10 years later, I can't tell you how God has blessed us with wealth,by hardwork and favor. The same sister is famzing with us now. Please, don't be bitter, join forces with your husband, work hard and pray hard. It will come to pass.
ReplyDeleteSome peoples entitlement mentality is sometimes baffling. You sister does not owe you anything. Even if your sister is as rich as Bill Gate and decides not to share her dime with you, you go on with your life. You're a married woman. Struggle with your husband to get yourself out of your poverty status. I'm sure you sister struggled to make herself who she is, why don't you struggle to make yours. She's probably seen that your over reliance on her is more to your detriment and that's why she's stopped spoonfeeding you.
DeleteI'm sure this is a recent development because If your sister had always been like this over the years, you would have gotten used to her stinginess and would not now be seeing it as an issue. The world is tough. You have to either sink or swim. No one owes you a damn thing. Work hard and get yourself out of your rut.
One thousand likes.
DeleteI keep saying this...... Relatives do the worst to people. For I share what my siblings and their so called husband did to me ehn....
After begging for no wrong doing with them not accepting....... Chai! I suffered then ehn.
I just disconnected, got married and faced my life. Only for them to start calling last year. I was shocked. One still called to check on me yesterday. So please you owe her no story. FACE YOUR LIFE AND HOME..... KAPISH!
If you have airtime, call to check on her👌👌
*comes,and...sorry for my typos.
DeleteSome rich people be helping outsiders without caring for their own family members first. "Adazoe nehi adazowa" that's what we call your sis and her type in bini...
ReplyDeletecut all ties with her, God will uplift you and your husband very soon.
So dz werey gal is from edo nice 👍 bae,That’s wat we call them adazoe rubbish.
DeleteLike your husband said, don't ask her anything and Don't complain bout anything to her. If she calls and asks how's the family or anything bout your wellbeing, simply tell her you're all fine. Believe what your husband has said, that very soon, everything will be fine. All the best
ReplyDeleteTank you Stella!!! Her sister is WICKED!!! I understand that nobody should feel entitled not even a parent, but we are in Africa. From my small salary I still manage to send my siblings money. Even if it’s 5k. Any month am not able to send to them I feel so bad, I even have to start telling them to be patient with me. When God blesses me I know my family would enjoy.
ReplyDelete@ poster this your case is not ordinary
ReplyDeleteYou need deliverance and serious pray to destroy every power behind your sister not helping you
She doesn't owe you anything. All of our help cometh from the Lord. Cast upon Him your burden and He will make a way. I had a younger sibling. Married a well to do man. The man was even heading a dept in the multinational oil coy where he works. He couldn't even help me or any of my siblings get even a contract job even when he had the power to do so. They were living the good life and each time we visited we got treated like 'poor' relatives. I and my siblings forgot them and focused on our lives. Fortunately i got a job that paid me well. I thank God i never had reason to ask them for any financial assistance. My sister's husband got posted outside Nigeria and they all traveled. My sister's contact with me was only via whatsapp. Each time i called the number never went through. But she was in constant communication with her friends. Called them regularly. On the two occasions she visited Nigeria, she was too busy to visit me-though we lived in same city before they travelled. She visited that same city and saw her friends.
ReplyDeleteSadly she died and was buried last year leaving her children behind. Her husband came back this year and we are still in same city. I am sad she died early. She should be alive to see what God will make out of me. My dear some siblings are from hell. Ignore your sister and face your destiny. There are so many things i passed through at the hands of my sister but i have decided to bury them alongside her. I have forgiven and forgotten. I just wrote this tiny bit to encourage you.
Wow. All these people shouting entitled are the stingy ones. Don't mind them. They think this life is just black and white. Poster just face front and forget her.
DeleteEven your parents owe you nothing. Nobody owe the other anything. Nigerians and their sense if entitlements. You are married but instead of your husband looking after you, you want your family to look after you and take up your lazy husband's responsibilities. mtchewweeeew
Deleteall of una don show...that sense of entitlement is wrong...your sister is enjoying her wealth with a clean mind....you yhat is seeking help from her is getting furious an annoyed even planing to cut her off..lol..funny right ? Use that energy to hustle jharee..So you wana cut her off because she refused assisting you ? That only shows me your type of person.i am very sure that your sister might have assisted you in her own little way..but your type no go ever appreciate....m sure..but you just want her.to carry all your family needs on her head.
ReplyDeleteThank you! These people feel entitled and get lazy believing 'my sister get money', she will be my ATM. One silly one in my family came asking for help to set up a business, only to give the money to one Bini guy to travel out. Guy man lock up once he got there while she's still here biting her fingers. Will I ever lift a finger to assist that kind of foolish person again? I jump am pass!
DeleteIs that how you treat your siblings? Is it appreciation that is your problem? Lol. You'll soon be humbled
DeleteMcedar calm down, nobody will be humbled if they are wise to save for d rainy day. I have an aunt who came to report how wicked her elder brother is, he doesn't do anything for her until my mom called d guy n he downloaded all d help he has been rendering, that he only stopped so he can invest in his new future, my eyes popped, meanwhile I don cuss d man tire not knowing d truth, so chill.
DeleteCommit your pain to God,he will change your situation. The Bible is forever true and factual,it says,do not put your trust in man,but in me(God). God will surprise you this month,he will touch the heart of men towards you,they will become your destiny helpers in life in Jesus name,Amen. Meanwhile,I thank God for my elder sister,she's a rare gem, she will rather drink garri while she helps u with her last cash,she's a merciful being,such a selfless giver.
ReplyDeleteHmmn. Poster dont cut her off. Pray for her and yourself too. She is not wicked but could belong somewhere and she is mandated not to allow her wealth benefit your family. She could be using those people's destinies to shine. Things are happening . Stella, curtail your emotions and dont be quick to judge. In africa everything is possible,even the unimaginable. Poster, work hard for your own and stop begrudging your sister. You can talk to her if you want but you are married and in your husband's house. Take care of your responsibilities.
ReplyDeleteChai na true oo
DeleteHmmnn. True cos things are happening ooo. Heard one today like African magic entertainment.
DeleteJust live tour life and stop complaining. If you have extra time pray for her.
Poster just ignore her,don't send her a text. This neglect from her should propel you to work double hard so that when your blessings come she won't say that she made you.
ReplyDeleteStay away from her,keep your head high work hard and pray hard and soon your story will change.
LEP😛
She doesnt owe you anything my dear, I am in the same boat with you. I have an uncle who is doing very well with the help of my late father, but he turned his back on us when we needed him till today. It's well.
ReplyDeleteThank you. She owe you nothing and stop your feeling of self entitlement. Rubbish.
DeleteDon™
Commit your pain to God,he will change your situation. The Bible is forever true and factual,it says,do not put your trust in man,but in me(God). God will surprise you this month,he will touch the heart of men towards you,they will become your destiny helpers in life in Jesus name,Amen. Meanwhile,I thank God for my elder sister,she's a rare gem, she will rather drink garri while she helps u with her last cash,she's a merciful being,such a selfless giver.
ReplyDeleteCommit your pain to God,he will change your situation. The Bible is forever true and factual,it says,do not put your trust in man,but in me(God). God will surprise you this month,he will touch the heart of men towards you,they will become your destiny helpers in life in Jesus name,Amen. Meanwhile,I thank God for my elder sister,she's a rare gem, she will rather drink garri while she helps u with her last cash,she's a merciful being,such a selfless giver.
ReplyDeleteI hardly comment, but this is what my family is experiencing. Only that he gives ones in a while. Just delete her in your life and double your hustle, God will see you through
ReplyDeleteMy dear disconnect from her, I can relate. I have a wicked elder brother like that. In fact we are like strangers now, this is someone that can spend any amount on his wife and kids but be giving me and my mother stories, he doesn't even support our dad too. To think my mum struggled to send him to university cos dad said he can't afford Uni. Even up to Masters and ICAN, now my brother works at a big logistics company in V.I. I just bless God for giving me the grace to keep distance from him and he has been faithful even to my mother. This last Christmas he came empty handed and my mum told he and his wife that they will reap what they sow since they have their own kids. He now promised to send her monthly upkeep frm this year but my mum told him not to bother since he always says so every year but would not fulfil.
ReplyDeleteIt's really painful, because my immediate elder brother also supported our elder brother when he couldnt pay house rent during the time he was jobless. This same bro of mine was sick and he couldn't help him out. He tried to stay in their house and his wife said they weren't comfortable, in less than a week they chased him out.
Worse of all is, when he needs our help he will start calling non stop, pestering my mum and manipulating her emotionally. Very irritating human being. We have seen through his wickedness but God has been faithful to us. Me I have assumed I have no elder brother and that I am an only child meanwhile people envy me that last born like me will be enjoying from 2 elder brothers.
imagine
DeleteI can do relate to this ur story. Infact my elder bro even with his surplus will still collect the little my mum has. I just cut from him. I don't need him in my life.
DeleteAnd people will say he doesn't owe your mum or dad and even you anything. I laugh in French at people who are their own flesh and blood suffering but can make generous donations to be applauded. I was brought up to know that nobody owes me but I know I owe my family if they are ever in need and I am in position to help. Any wealth that would make me turn my back from my family, I have told God to keep it far from me.
DeletePoster, your sense of entitlement is out of this world, remove your eye from what she does what her money, she worked hard to make it, work hard and make yours also.Have a talk with her, dont stylishly chip in your financial issues when she calls you to gossip, tell her outrightly. Dont expect her to carry job from her office and drop on your head, arrange your CV, send to her and tell her to inform you when there is any vacancy. You dont have to count all what you did for her, your reward is in heaven. Ndo Nne
ReplyDeleteAlternatively, call her out on SM, when next she starts famzing you on SM, tell her to stop showing you plastic love online as she doesnt really care about your welfare. Ensure you tag her friends and colleagues and even Instablog. That must surely reset her brain. Thank you!
Poster face your life,leave her in her world. Just pray for God's blessings over your household. I have a stingy, selfish and infact wicked sister too. When she needs help everyone even the younger ones will contribute money to assist her. We have all sacrificed so much for her,money,time, just name. But when she has she never brings out. I thought of cutting her off, everyone in the family is actually tired of her selfishness but I told them to keep managing her.
ReplyDeleteI wanted to call her and tell her my mind, but my hubby advised I just let her be. I don't need her help personally,but let her assist our younger ones with the little she has. She can buy clothes,shoes and bags for herself well,but can't send 2k home.
Poster,so you are not alone. We can only pray for God to change such people because they are not ready to change.
Poster, you have a serious entitlement mentality. What if you were an only child? What is your motive in helping people? You rendered help to her, nobody is indispensable.God sees the extent of sincerity of your heart and would bless you accordingly. Cutting her off would do you no good. Will it reduced the money in her bank account? Is she supposed to deny her kids necessities to please you? What was your contribution to making her financially stable today? If she didn't end up with her extent of financial stability would you be sending this chronicle
ReplyDeleteThe problem is YOU,YOU,You and YOU. Dear poster you have a leeching and parasitic mentality. Go back to the drawing board. You are looking for free money and there is none anywhere. Look for services you can offer to people in her network and let her link you up. Let her show you the way to fish, instead of giving you fish because trust me it will never be enough.When she doesn't agree to that, you are then licensed to call her out.
Her helping other people shouldn't bother you and is not your business,they may be more less privileged than you are, after all no be you dey work money put for inside her pocket.
DON'T CUT HER OFF, YOU WILL DIE IN ISOLATION! CHANGE YOUR THINKING.
P:S- I have been in your exact shoes, my elder sister didn't contribute a dime to my education, and i don't expect her to pick up my family's bills because i rendered help when she needed it because while i rendering help, i also benefited immensely for her that i would even wish to bless her more for be patient and housing me all those while.
Every body has a good side and ad side. You are very wicked for not mentioning the good things you also enjoyed, rather picking on small things such as returning her shoe. That she didn't let you go out with your own even shows she care about your well being even if it is a little. Did you even bother to find out if that was an anniversary gift.
Be open to rational thinking!
You speak the truth!
Deleteit was even OK for the husband to allow her wife go beg for money at her sister''s. .smfh..The man should be the one going to hustle 4 the family.
DeleteThis network na bastard,I finished typing epistle let me proofread and publish,the page refreshed it self and I lost my hard typed comment.chai
ReplyDeleteLet me be brief,like they say "Success is the best revenge".
You and your hubby should hustle hard,and forget about her.God can use any body to bless you.stop looking unto her and start looking into God!!
Nice advice
DeleteLike most people have said, your sister owes u nothing. But at the same time, what joy does a person derive when your sibling are not doing well? What affects my siblings, affects me. I remember 2016, i wasn't working. My younger sister for that matter was the one who encouraged me and assisted me financially in ways that no man is yet to. She covered for me financially even when we had family events twice without my people knowing i didn't contribute to the events. i can go on and on. Now God has helped me, i have a job and i also do what i can do for her. Family is everything. The shame your siblings feel when things are not going well for them, should be felt by u. Be your brother's keeper.
ReplyDelete***Start Looking unto God
ReplyDeleteSister from hell
ReplyDeleteWickedness
In life never feel entitled to someone's money or you will be very dissapointed.I am an only girl and i have brothers.I can never have and they are stranded i will not sleep well.I guess is how we grew up sharing and looking out for each other.I strive on my own and pray i should never be in a situation i will even need assistance from them.Love is sharing.Your sister is plain wicked but the bitter truth is that she owes you nothing!Grow up and let her actions spur you to your own zenith in life.
ReplyDeleteIn issues like this we tend to take sides with the one telling the story. I was always helping my siblings to the extend that almost everything they want to do, my contribution will be there, its like am working and living for them while they are using my money to take care of their families. I had to stop and start taking care of myself the next thing you hear is "i beg her money she nor gree give me, she wicked ehhh" forgetting the ones i have given before.
ReplyDeleteEvery story has two sides, i strongly believe the sister must have been helping her before she stopped doing so and now she is wicked because she does not have her own life and family to carter for.
In life nobody owe you anything, if they give you thank God if they don't dont kill yourself still move on.
Good! My dad use to say, if u don't invest in urself when d chips are up, the people who were eating ur chips will ask you what u used ur money for when d chips are down.
DeleteStory of my life! Truth is, paradise is always far from home. These days, siblings do not help each other.
ReplyDeletePoster, first. Your sister owes you a lot if she wishes you acknowledge her as one. I don't understand this selfishness among Nigerians these days. If you are my fucking sibling and which we recognize ourselves as such we owe each other a lot of things. What nonsense am I reading on this blog.
ReplyDeleteIf you feel you owe me nothing and you are my sibling, then I don't owe you being your brother or sister. Do your thing and don't fucking involve me. Don't even call me because we don't have anything to discuss.
Poster you are the cause of this. If she feels she owes you nothing and therefore doesn't help, then what is need of still seeing her as your sis. I guess you are lazy as such you have this low self esteem. Stop picking her damn calls and don't return it either. You don't need to write any message to her. She is not worth it. Even if you don't have money, you should have respect for your self. Stop picking her fucking calls, take out your hope on her. Inukwa gossip.
In fact, pretend to forget she exists. Forget her entirely. Get up and work. It is difficult but if you are desperate about it you will succeed.
Madam which one is selfishness among nigerians??? If u know the whites very well, you would know that nobody tks d responsibility of another, even siblings. You work for your money, ask Stella how many of her inlaws has her husband put through school? It is even here that we think because our sibling has made it, then we feel entitled to a part of what they have.
DeleteAre you sure is not the husband, because there are some families that are been fully controlled by the husband even when the wife earns more than the husband. Text message to her expressing your pain, probably she will have some explanation.
ReplyDeleteHmmmm this is deep
ReplyDeletemy own case is different, hubby helps both siblings, relatives, stepbrothers every dick and tom,sometimes he hides to gives them money so I don't question him, now things are somehow for us those people all disappeared, but I know the God of restoration will surely lift us up again. my hubby has a very soft heart to help. he doesn't eat alone. God bless him and restore all we have lost back again Amen
ReplyDeleteIt's not a wise thing to put ur hope in humans, they might fail you, the best thing you can do for yourself now is not to ask ur sister for anything again, hustle hard for yourself, who knows, if she sees you putting effort at something she might be moved to support, as I am I don't ask my elder ones for money, I hustle hard and they will say 'sis you don't have to subject urself to such labour, come n take this' that's how I am, even my parents have their own retirement plan worked out cos according to them, kids of these days are too western. Put yourself in a position where u won't have to be overly dependent cos disappointment is real.
ReplyDeleteWise woman!
DeleteGo and find your way home make your own money and stop putting your eyes in her life.
ReplyDeleteI hate people like you that always believe they must be helped by someone just because they feel they comfortable. She has her problems too just like you have yours. What if you don't have her as your siblings?
Abeg go look bush.
DON™
Hmmmm sisters like this make me want to puke,my sister i pray the almighty bless you now and always because she is my backbone.
ReplyDeleteCut all communications from that your sister, she is harmless, wicked, let her be, stop asking her for help, face your family and let her be. Any time she put up your pictures during your birthday comment and tell her you don't like eyes service people. Do not cost her.
ReplyDeleteIn this life, the best thing anyone can do for themselves is to live life like a hustler with no-one to run to for help and you will be better off.
ReplyDelete1. You will be more determined to succeed
2. You will pride your self knowing you achieved success by yourself, for yourself
3. Nobody will come and insult you unnecessarily with statements like "if not for me, you wouldn't be what you are today"
The popular yoruba adage has finish the talk that been born together does not say he should help you only the one that God send to you can help you.put trust in God and one day your story will change for good.
ReplyDeleteOne side of the story!!
ReplyDeleteYour sister is not mandated to financially fund your life especially when you have a husband. Truth be told, as a married woman you are your husband's responsibility. It is your husband who is supposed to care for your needs not your sister. I would side with you if you were single and starting out, but you are a married woman under her husband's roof. As married ppl you bear your struggles as one until things get better. Unless you are starving with nothing to eat or on the brink of homelessness you should not be reaching out to your sister for anything. Your husband should also have more pride and not look to your people to carry him, the most he should ask for is job opportunities nothing further. When he took you to wife did he not know how he was going to provide for you?
ReplyDeleteAnyhow, I come from a family of all daughters and this shit could not happen with us, we just roll different, but we all have our personal pride and dignity and I expect the man I marry not to look to my family for our survival. Sit with your husband and formulate a five year plan, go to a woman focused NGOs to see if they can offer a microfinance loan to start your business, speak with charities if you need food and essentials. Take your focus off you sister and concentrate it on your household, do not share with her the moves you are making, just make your move quietly. Give yourself three years to change your life and five years to reach all your goals.
All of you yarning crap abt entitlement are dumb idiots,even miss aboki, wey dey beg Stella for giveaway sef the talk,what an insult,silly mofons look at Linda ikeji she changed d entire lives of her siblings they are on their own now,and she will die proudly cos rewrote her family history. same as moji dopesi,Kanu papilo,the okoyes before the fight Family is everything what is the use of money when there is nobody to share with,if u die suddenly now,na family Go inherit yr pickin train them,abi we go throway dem for bush? No be govt, nor were u work. It is only selfish people dat will have so much n deir siblings will live in penury ,Haba we are African's ( family oriented,cultural people,and highly sentimental)so cut d bull crap we no be oyinbo,oyinbo sef they help strangers in form of charity, even Stella has helped most of your broke asses & she no know una papa from Adams,he that water's shall be watered, my uncle was a rich man he trained all his brothers both steps with his money,he eventually had problems n became broke it was one of the steps brothers he helped dat picked him up wen things got bad for him ,whatever u sow, u will reap.I cannot be dressed in gold n my siblings in rags its a shame on me .I love family n nobody is an island we ,all need each other in one or the other how can u be insensitive to my plight and pick yr mother forking phone for singing my praises on my birthday Omo the thunder dat will fire go pass Sodom & Gomorrah. Pardon my typos biko my blood dey rage. Stella post my comment na my 1st time and I don dey yr blog since maime days,side eyez.
ReplyDeleteIt's easy for everyone to say the poster feels entitled. Why shouldn't she? Isn't her sister helping outsiders and her own blood suffers? Tueh! Dear poster, our priest (God bless him abundantly) in one of his Friday homilies said, "when they don't help you, God doesn't want them to take his Glory. God will connect you to your destiny helpers." That particular sermon that day touched me because we're going through the same thing at the moment. Take courage! Keep her at arms length. Ensure she gets the message that things are now different. Stop asking her for anything but don't keep malice. Malice hinders our prayers. Speak with her but it should be abrupt. Keep praying. Start something, no matter how little before God blesses you with that dream job. God will connect you and your husband to your destiny helpers IJN. Amen.
ReplyDeleteHaba the posters sister is a devil,borrowed money to go for a vacay, who does dat. Omo just free her, but if na my sister she no go prosper cos she don offend world pple ,n she must surely see the reward. I go make sure say I do her bad, she no go recover from. And her money no fit save her .
ReplyDeleteGod won't allow me have a sibling like you, your type will kill a prosperous person out of jealousy, no wonder you are not a helper, but looking for crumbs.
DeleteDon't put your trust in any man but God Sister, don't mention your needs to her hearing again and let her know that she is only one hand amongs the Billion hands in the world. God will send you help
ReplyDeleteKikki you are such a senseless and stupid commenter.....so cos you have lazy family members anybody complaining about a sibling is the same? You don’t know the poster so stop being judgemental. Say your side and end it there...it is not entitlement mentality to complain about your situation to a sibling and expect help...what is family if you can’t help each other? How can you pay school fees for strangers and not pay for a sibling who helped you raise your kids? That’s wickedness don’t care what anyone says.....poster since you know who your sister is, don’t ask her for anything....even if you call or visit just laugh, greet, gist and find your way home...God will do yours
ReplyDeleteHmmm!! Thank God I don't have this mindset of asking people for money. My mum even said that I am proud. Yes, I am because I work my ass hard to make a living. Poster, stop depending on your sister.
ReplyDeleteYou stayed with her when you were young, I'm sure she paid your fees to attend school. I feel she stopped helping you since you decided to marry a brokeass. All they other money given to you has been spent on your husband.
ReplyDeleteShouldn't your husband be looking for how to provide for his household? How can you be proud to say you are the breadwinner. A man that has no shame should not be called a man.
Since you have decided to stay with him, why not face front and leave your sister. Her husband will hustle money, your husband will now collect it from him and spend on girls.