You know what Drama means right?And you do know that anyone who takes part in any drama is a drammarian?
Lets talk about Family drama that impacted on us,shamed us or/and changed our lives forever.!
Or was it so funny you cannot forget?or was it so heart breaking you would rather not talk about it?
Mine is funny.......At a time when i was growing up,we all used to eat from one plate but on this particular day,my late elder brother magneted the beef in the soup with every Eba that he swallowed and when the last one vanished,I landed him the hardest punch ever and he retaliated and i fell down in a faint.......
After I woke up,i pretended to faint again and the drama was so big and so loud that,it was the last time we ever ate anything together.
I still remember it now when i am eating with so much beef in my food and I just laugh out loud!!!
Enter your comment...lol stella u re funny
ReplyDeleteIn our house in owerri; everyday na drama abeg. It was more of a bustop for both maternal and paternal extended family members including friends.
ReplyDeleteOne day, we all had to scale the fence to leave the house cos we couldn't find the key. Everyone scaled including my dad and mum. Infact, this is the least I no fit type. Till now sef, when we all gather, na area be thatπππ
Hehehehehe πππππππππ
ReplyDeleteSDK yaf kill me with laughter
You must miss him so much
So voting interesting gist, so leggo
Lol. That was funny.
ReplyDeleteROTFL
ReplyDeleteOur bros then used to make us hate eating with him so that he could have it all to himself.
For instance, when we are having beans and garri, he would makes sure the beans scooped by his spoon branches the plate of garri before landing in his mouth. In no time the water in the plate of garri will be looking reddish with lots of beans swimming inside the plate of garri.
I used to be disgusted by the act and I would stop eating.
Many more acts of his are in our records. Be using seniority to perfect oppression.
Hahahaha
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DeleteShuo...see Stella o...Landing your elder Bro a punch? The result could be be better imagines than the double fainting.
ReplyDeleteMy eldest bros nko, always forming he doesn't eat yam but whenever Mum pound the yam with correct Nsala soup, the guy will eat and lick plate sef plus take the biggest meat before we share others. Child hood memories though.
Lol so hilarious
ReplyDeleteI can hardly remember any drama while growing up bcx I grew up in a small family. I was practically all by myself
ReplyDeleteSome of you might not find this story funny.
ReplyDeleteWell growing up in a house where you are the youngest wasn't that easy.
It was Lent and as usual we all have to fast, and my elder ones are quite good at fasting unlike me, I love food, I can eat every hour of the day, yet I'm not fat.
Day one, my Mum woke us up by 5am and we ate, fasting was to last till 6pm. My Mum will lock the kitchen and say "Don't let the devil use you, fast and pray for God to bless our family, Rowland, you are still young and innocent so God will answer your prayers faster". If only she knew that when she goes to work my number one aim is to go peep Ngozi our beautiful neighbor who is way older than I am when she's bathing. To top it off, Stephen my very good friend will supply me this week Hint Magazine, and when we were done reading it, we'd smoke the paper like a cigarette, so as to shred every evidence. So I wonder how God will answer my prayer faster, when I'm the least innocent.
Anyways I managed to survive the first 5days of Lent thanks to Jamal, my Muslim friend whom I would go to his house and shorten his ration of his afternoon meal, clean my mouth well, and look meek like the Holy Ghost had descended upon me.
Day 7, I went to Jamal's house only to find out that he and his family had traveled to Ilorin, what do I do? Worst of all my other friends around were Catholics, and also fasting, mbok it's not me that will come and go and die, after all no be send Don Baba Jesus to die.
Day 8, As faith will have it, our neighbor Mama Timothy brought Timothy to our house to stay with us till she returns back from work, but whenever she drops him, she'd leave his afternoon meal so we can feed him, since we were fasting.
I'm guessing you all know what happened next, yes?
Little did she know that she just handed her sons lunch, to a lion that needs something to devour.
First day, Timothy and I shared his meal which was not enough, second day I settled for eating the whole damn thing and rub the ororo(oil) on Timothy's lips and shirt like he was indeed eating. Oh did I mention Timothy is just 3, so he can't talk much, after 6 days, Timothy was already loosing weight and myself who is fasting is adding weight odd right. So Timothy's Mum told my Mum that I wasn't fasting and I was eating her sons food, when my Mum asked I denied, my Mum took the liberty to set a trap for me, and as a hunger monger I fell for it.
It was a Saturday and my Mum had just cooked a sweet Jollof rice for dinner and she left the kitchen open and said she was going to the market, only for me to go to the kitchen helped myself with a plate of rice and drank water, barely 10 mins after I had finished the food, my Mum came in and called all my brothers to come, that I have let the devil and his agent consume me with stealing. Before I could deny anything with swift movement my Mum dipped her hand in my mouth and almost immediately I vomited all I ate. That day, like Game of Thrones Queen Cersei, I took my walk of Shame.....
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DeleteHeheheheh
Cersei’s walk of shame is still fresh in my mind.
I enjoyed your story.
A vote from me to you...
πππspoilt child. One vote for you.
DeleteRow row row your boat... Lol, after 6 days Timothy was already loosing weight. You 'was' a boy with no conscience I swear. Can I vote? Yes? I vote for you
DeleteI always enjoy your stories. Even the one about your dad flogging you. I laughed so hard,almost fell of my seat.
DeleteHahhahahhahahhaπππππππππ
DeleteRow Rowland,real walk of shame
You gat my vote bro
πππππI vote for you
DeleteI don't normally vote but your story cracks me up real bad and still laughing my colleagues are just looking at me like someone who is insane...you got my vote bro
DeleteOkay i didn't see the money part.
DeleteBeloved me vote this.
Shantelle you didn't vote ooh.
DeletePlease come back and type ‘I vote for you’ or something like that.. Or else I fear it might be a lost vote for himππ½♂️ππ½♂️ππ½♂️
hahahahaha......loool
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DeleteI vote for you
Lmao, so real. I vote for you.
DeleteIt was funny till I got to the part you ate a little child's food.Whatever mehn
DeleteYeah you have my vote. Cuz your story is hilarious and you write so damn well!
DeleteI vote for you boo.
DeleteI laughed hard and pictured all.. I vote for you
DeleteI will have to go anonymous on this, growing up was fun, I had the best siblings, suddenly one of them got sick, really sick that we went every where for solution, my mum was always on the road, from one pastor to another, one doctor to another, things was so bad, even our relations kept their distance, my other siblings had to stay strong for each other, even till now, we are still trusting God for a miracle. One of my suitors heard about the sickness, and left, he didn't even look back, I have lost friends, my parents have tried, we have left everything to fate. Imagine not sleeping at night, the screaming till the next day, lives on drugs, hardly eats. Was the best sibling while growing up, was there for us, the younger ones, does all the chores, does our assignment, fights for us, till this sickness took all those memories.I still love you S
ReplyDeleteSad. Wishing your brother permanent healing In Jesus Name π. Amen. Be strong dear.
DeleteI pray he gets his permanent healing..
DeleteI pray he gets well
DeleteIs it a mental sickness? if yes then i think its time you people put him in a hospital, it might not be easy but it will be the best so that you people can rest esp your mum cos that woman is not sleeping with such screaming, then discrimination you people are facing. Put him there they will take care of him better then you visit him and continue praying, you can change location from one part of the state to the other parts.
DeleteGod will see him through, as for the suitor he is not your own.
He is healed in Jesus name, Amen
DeleteInstead of watching him suffer and allowing his youth to waste and enduring the misery, take him to omega fire ministries auchi. He will receive immediate healing. It's most likely jazz and you have lost a suitor. God knows what people are saying about your family. Take him there as fast as possible
DeleteLol
ReplyDeleteBack then at home,we always have the habit of fetching water at a very far distant,because then borehole was not really invoke,it was God that even preserved our lives ,because of the high way we normally cross when fetching water.it was fun then shall ,when all your families are complete in tur house is always fun,but when they have all gone to there various destinations in life,the house become boring,those time I will wash a lot of plates because we were much den,or grind plenty pepper on the grinding stone ,because mum refuse using engine claiming grinding stone stew is much sweeter or fire wood food is much sweeter ,those time ,is all past now.I miss those times
ReplyDeleteInvoke abi in vogue? My eyes dey pain me biko!
DeleteI am from a polygamous home and the family drama no be here o! Imagine a polygamous family of 4 wives and 33 living children. In fact,I have the intention of applying for a community name for my polygamous family. Abi na bad idea to have ''Umu Okah'' village? I was born a twin and the constant bickering between Peter and I (Paul) left many people wondering if we were really related. Peter really dealt with me! Education wise,I was more intelligent, but he was smarter and full of mischief. I can't remember now,but either of us lost his slate during our nursery school days. As a punitive measure, my mum refused to replace the lost slate and insisted we must share one slate. Well,to show his smartness,Peter would tell me to be the first to write on the slate. After writing,I would hand over to our teacher for a single stroke of a mark with a coloured chalk. After the assessment,Peter would clean the numbers/ alphabets and then write his own. It is his handwriting on the slate that we will take home. I will have nothing to present, while he would show the whole world what he had written. Fighting was the order of the day between us and he usually mobilized other children to taunt or fight me. Fighting between meals was a regular occurrence as my mum refused to dish our food in separate plates. He was always fond of stealing meat from the soup and can take balls of garri in quick succession,no matter how hot the food was.
ReplyDeleteOne day, in the middle of a meal,a serious fight broke out between us. My mum was helpless as we upturned the soup,moulded balls of garri and threw on each other. In an attempt to separate us, she earned knocks and bites meant for each other. Her helpless cries took another dimension when Peter broke my head with a stone. I was chasing him all over the compound with blood streaming down my face. It took a lot of pleading for me to relent and allow my mum to take me to a chemist store for treatment. After the treatment of the wound, she bought Lucozade Boost for me and I fell asleep once we got home. One day,I pulled a life worm from my anus and Peter told his gang. They labelled me ''Paul,eartworm shitter'' and I was crying and refused to show my face in the street for days.Peter was lively, while I was a loner and hated him every day. I ''failed'' in Primary Two when I refused to be promoted to join him and his gang in Primary Three. As a result,he finished ahead of me in the primary school.
We parted after my JSS1 as I went to stay with my uncle in Cross River State. Ironically, the incident started making us to be fond of each other as there was no more an every day fight. Upon my return after my Junior WAEC, we started getting along and doing things together. After our secondary school, we started hustling together for a better future.
He was more interested in business,while I preferred a University education. However,another drama broke out when he wanted to get married in 2012. Many of our family members were opposed his decision because he was just 25,though financially stable, due to his dint of hardwork and business acumen. His excuse was that he needed help in managing his growing business. But my parents felt it would put an unnecessary pressure on me since I was still studying in the University. The hullabaloo was just too much, to the extent that he threatened to cut himself off from the family if he was not allowed to have his way. He was eventually allowed,for peace to reign and the wedding is still memorable in my mind. He chose his primary school friend as his best man and,though in the venue of the wedding,I spent the whole day ''safeguarding'' the drinks procured for the occasion. Though the new family he started made him to become someone insensitive to the issues involving his extended family,as mature men we are now, we now flow as twins than the ''strangers'' we were.
Twin!!!!ππΌππΌππΌ
DeleteYou have my vote! I love twins, did you know that?
Lolsππ
DeleteU have my vote
I want twins
“Can take balls of garri in quick succession no matter how hot” π€£π€£π€£π€£
DeleteNice story, I vote for you.
Hahhahahahhahahah...see me laughing and rolling on the flow.
DeleteI vote you Mr.Paul.
Wow. Twins.
DeleteYou have my vote.
I'm voting this one.I love twins
DeleteI'm having this feeling that if I don't vote for you heaven might think I'm not serious about umu ejima. I vote for you
DeleteI didn't quite get that climax from your write up but you got my vote.
DeleteI vote for Mr Paul.
DeleteBia Beloved(SDK P.A) biko count my vote o. I decided to lock profile because of APC goons and stalwarts. You get security for me in Lagos?
Ehen!
HahHhhaha no way.. So funny cN I vote again?
DeleteNooooooooo @Peaceful Peace. Time has passed na.
DeleteVoting hours... 2pm on Saturday to 2pm on Sunday.
Hmmm.. mine are shameful cos my parents are always fighting with my mum always moving out.Remembered one time my mum moved out and left us with dad.one day I & my Lil bro were playing outside my mum came with a taxi to "steal" us.I just heard her whispering my name.when ilookef up she beckoned to come. when I wanted to scream 'mummy' she shisssed me.Took me and my bro into d taxi and asked us to lie down so no one will see us.That was how she took us.
ReplyDeleteThe day my dad discovered where we were staying and came for us was another drama.kia its well with my family
I remember when I was in Jss1 my younger sister, our last born died. Gosh, my mom almost followed her. How was hell, screaming out of the blues from mum, not letting dad burn her clothes and pictures,mum walking out of the house in the middle of the night and so on. Thank God she got better. Then bam!!! I got sick. Not all these small sickness oh, I mean sickness that they can't even pin point what is happening to me. I started losing weight, I stopped eating, stopped going to school, I was bedridden while mum and dad were running around looking for cure. Did I tell you my dad didn't shed tears when my younger sister died? Well he didn't. He was being strong for the household.
ReplyDeleteThat was how one night like that, I was still on the couch in the parlor looking like a ghost, I was alone with my dad. Dad looked at me and called me like 5 times before I could answer once. That was how my dad started crying. Gosh he was wailing begging e not to die too. Asking me if I wanted to follow my sister? Is she calling me? Am I seeing dead people? He was begging me, I was crying too promising my dad that I won't die. Mum heard all the wailing and came running fearing the worst only for her to see her husband and daughter crying on the floor. She just carried me away and left him there. That was the day I started getting better, cos it was so hard seeing my strong dad so broken.
Thank God for life.
I thank God for your life.
DeleteTo God be the glory.
DeleteChai anon your story was so touching ....thank God for restoration of life and may your sis soul continue to rest in peace.
DeleteAww. Thank God.
DeleteSo back then we lived in a two bedroom flat, the compound had three flats in it. Ours was at the back and we had a back door in the kitchen. The first flat was occupied by a 'calabar' family so the reared dogs, kill them and eat too.
ReplyDeleteOne fateful Saturday morning, after morning devotion mom announced to us that we were going to be having beans as breakfast (she knew her kids didn't like beans). Dad gave us that wicked smile knowing we won't eat that much.
So in anger i entered the kitchen and started picking beans, lil sis too was grumbling so dad got upset and ask us to go out because we were disturbing him so we followed the back door (tears filled up in our eyes).
We started to pick the beans like that. After some mins we heard our mom call for us
Mom:em yoruba chic
Me: ma!
Mom: you people should come inside o, its like this people have started to kill their meat this morning o
Part2
ReplyDeleteWe ignored moms warning and continued with what we were doing.
After some minute we just saw Monday( a guy staying with the calabar family) running towards us with a knife dripping with blood shouting at the top of his voice
Monday:he don cut, he dey follow me, run (while running)
we threw our trays filled with beans away and ran after Monday. I could hear mom and dads voice at the same time screaming "pass here"
Dad was calling for us from the front entrance while mom was calling from the back door.
Myself and sis was just after Monday screaming "o ti jaa o, e gba wa" (it has escaped, help us)we could hear the dog bark in pain but didn't know where it was.
Part3
ReplyDeleteWe ran out of the gate and in the process my sis fell heavily and broke her arm.
She was later taken to the hospital and was diagnosed of abdominal something(cant remember again jhawe). She was operated on and i can remember it was the navel area.
The scar is still very much there and its a drama that can never be forgotten in my family.
After the drama, the calabar family stopped killing their dogs during the day and late left.
First time typing epistle, forgive any error
Lmao
Deleteπππππ hilarious,
Delete.You have my vote.
Lol. Eeyah.
DeleteI wish you didn't break your story this way.. It could have got more attention, But you've got my vote.
Deleteπ€£π€£π€£π€£π€£Instead of going to take your bath, You went through all this trouble. Lmao!
DeleteReminds me of the one of that girl with chicken that has been cut in the bathroom. Lmao. I vote for you
DeleteMtewwwwww
DeleteTGW where @thou?
ReplyDeleteIn my family then, whenever we are asleep and mum or dad have to wake us, he would be very vigilant because anything might happen. There was this day mum woke my brother to go and pee only for him to go open d pot, pee in it, and later went to sit inside the fridge. Mum waited for him to return for minutes, when he isn't showing, she went searching for him, she saw d fridge open and wanted to know what was wrong and she met him inside fridge, anytime my brother or my sister fell asleep before the meal is ready baby serious trouble before they eat the food, there was a night I slept outside our house then mum wanted to close for d day, she woke me up, naso I turned to Usain Bolt o, I started running and all the relatives outta ran after me, they were unable to catch me not until I fell on the main road, then I was brought back home. D shame for that week too much Abeg. When I was in junior sec. School, there was this guy Abbey, that I know was crushing on me, it was obvious to even my then friend, then we use to fetch water in there house, mum woke me and my brother very early Dt day at around 6:am to go and fetch water, As I still they enjoy d sleep nah I woke up angrily, took bucket and started going only for my eye to open well when I got to d queue at the borehole, my people I swear na only pant they my body, come see as everyone they look me with one eye, As I Don dy get breast small small nah. The shame catch me so tey I told dad I will like to go live with my aunt.
ReplyDeleteππ€£π€£π€£π€£π€£
DeleteUna love sleep for your family. 1 Voteπ
*Iphie Dearie, it will seem far-fetched, except if there's someone who can identify me in this blog, but the only two sisters I have from my mother are also twins. However, no one in the whole family has been blessed with twins and I wonder why.
ReplyDelete*Sharon Aminu, sure,you will. God will grant your heart desires.
Na wao! I noticed one or two ''syntactic suicide'' in the post,but I plead for forgiveness,as I was in a hurry to post and I didn't proofreader. I would vote myself because the edited part on my phone is somehow funnier,but last last we go dey alright. Shout out to the BVs here,na de work wey we de do.
Maybe the twins will come from una Children.
DeleteWhile growing up, my parents once left the five of us under the care of our elder sister(she is the first). Everything was going on smoothly until one Saturday morning. While she was cooking she beckoned on myself and my kid sister to go and take our baths but no way, we were enjoying the games we were playing with our two elder brothers. After sometime the four of us got tired of playing and headed downstairs to check if the food was ready. It was actually ready but my sister carried the full pot to the store in the kitchen, kept the pot on top of the fridge there and locked the door. According to her since we didn't want to take our baths, we won't eat. We watched her as she ate hers and slept off. Thanks to boarding house training, my brothers had to improvise. We brought out that big long wooden spoon used in turning party jollof, brought out a long frying spoon, a bowl and headed to the store window outside. We tied the long frying spoon to the long wooden spoon and passed them through the window. We used the spoon to carefully open the pot and started scooping rice carefully and turning it inside the bowl. After filling the bowl we ran to the back of one of the cars to eat. Little did we know my sister was awake already and shouting our names. Next thing we saw her behind us.... It was scary. She didn't even have mercy... She carried the bowl before we could finish the rice. Wickedness in high places.
ReplyDeleteLol @ wickedness in high place, do you blame her? You and your brothers was giving her stress.
DeleteHahahahaha. Your story reminds me of how I do taunt my sweet Aunty. I love tour story. I guess if voting are in order I vote you.
DeleteI vote for Paul the twin
ReplyDeleteNoted
DeleteI vote for paul the twin. Twins fall on me
ReplyDeleteNoted
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