Mama Tee Series -When Your Partner Insists On Knowing How Much You Earn..

Is it right for your partner to know how much you earn?
I once had a boyfriend who insisted on knowing my take-home pay or we call it quits.

This my ex, let's call him Dave, he worked in an NGO while I was still working at the hotel but as a Supervisor by then.

When we newly started, he expressed his displeasure for my hotel job but in trying to calm him down, I told him the pay was ok and that I also made money on a daily basis. He asked how much I was being paid and I told him. He asked if I had any on-going project that takes the extra cash (first alert) I told him I was only seeing my younger ones through school. I asked about his own job too , he said his salary was ok but not fixed and that it comes according to how much the organisation got from donations. Lols.

This guy would call me in the middle of the month to borrow money, I would give him. He won't pay back. I would visit him weekends and on my way to his place I would buy fruits, drinks and some foodstuff. I would cook and serve the drinks I bought including wines from my hotel. When leaving, he would drop me and squeeze N1000 note in my palm or drop it in my bag. Asides that, he never bought N20 groundnut for me. Weekends, he wouldn't want us to go out, he would say he needed to rest.

Oh God! I was like 'this one na one chance relationship' but a friend told me he would change as time goes on, he might be testing me.

Well, six months on, no changes. I was tired of playing mumu. I started plotting my exit.

I got a better job in a company and quit my hotel job. Right from the first interview, uncle Dave was hammering on the pay.

'How much did you negotiate with them?'
'How much is in your appointment letter?'
'I know the standard pay for your position, I don't want them to cheat you'.
All the while I was just 'yimu'ing'. If I hear. I told him they said they would put me on 3months probation before giving me appointment letter and that the salary too was not fixed yet but within a certain range. Lols.
First month alert entered, I deleted it sharp sharp.
Few days later, we met and he went:

Dave: Baby, have those people paid you?

Me: yes, since last week, its almost finished sef.

Dave: let me see the alert

Me: they don't do banks with new staff, they gave us envelopes

Dave: how much? I need to know that they are not just using you (yimu)

Me: I can't even remember, but its better than the hotel's own.

Dave: (face changes) when you get home, search for the envelope and check it, they usually write the amount on it. Hahahahahahahahahaha

Me: they didn't write the amount on it, just my name

Dave: (angrily) look, if you can't be free enough to tell me how much you earn, then forget this relationship, it's not like I want to collect it from you, I only want to guide you. See how you are playing me like I'm a fool. How much do you earn? Is it up to what I use for recharge cards in a month?

He went on and on.

I just picked my things and left his place. He later called several times, I just deleted him and that was the end of the 'situationship'. Hahahahahaha
Did I do wrong by leaving? Should I have told him my monthly pay?


Mama Tee