Liz Benson's daughter got married a while back and the pictures were everywhere and of course comments flowed. I read people commenting on how Liz is more beautiful than the daughter . I tried to get into Liz's head and see how she would accept such comments. Why? Because I'm in the same dilemma.
Like you know i gave birth to twins, a girl and boy. My daughter looks like her father. The resemblance was even more when she was a baby. She even carry bald head join sef.
Then people used to be like wow you have twins, eyah 2 boys how nice. Of course we will correct them. But the thing used to pain my husband so much that sometimes he will flare up and reply, can't you see her earrings. He even used to ask some if their eyes dey pain them.
Then as she grew older I'd hear people say Kai you too over fine pass your daughter, this your girl no fine o, her brother is finer.
Such comments used to break my heart, it's every parent desire for their children to be better than them in all areas including looks.
My response has always been she will grow into her looks.
I love to be flattered , tell me I look pretty and I will love you. Tell me I look good for an Iya beji and you are my friend for life.
But tell me say I fine pass my daughter and I won't like you so much.
I know for certain that she will grow into her looks and that's what I tell people.
Being a mum has made me less critical.
So I looked at Liz Bensons daughter pictures and even though the mum was finer I couldn't comment on that. Not even anonymously. Because I'm wearing that kind of shoe now and I know where it hurts.
Have you ever been in a situation where people are mocking someone or something and because you are facing something similar you just jejely keep quiet.
*Hahahahahahhaha my own is the other way round..when my blue eyed boyfriend was still very small and we used to go out for walks,people would stop to play with him and be asking him ''Awww your mum must be at work,you are so cute..''
I used to wonder what in heavens name they meant......Now he is almost 11yrs old and stands up for me..He says'' this is my mama,she is from Nigeria and she is a Journalist,we dont look alike but she carried me for 9 months......''
Everyone just keeps quiet and i burst out laughing.
Eeyah....i have a twins as friend too(boy/girl)and the mom is far prettier than her. She is the girl. I love her spirit because she always say she is prettier than her mom when people taunt her, lol.
ReplyDeleteAnd that's how we went to visit a neighbour that just had a babygirl and I mentioned that baby looked like her mom and my mom cuts in and says "yeah a good looking version of her mother" right in front her and other visitors... argh mami!��
DeleteBut really what happened to Leelee, Liz Benson's daughter. She was so cute when we were in primary school. LeeLee and Richard were just too fine. Na Rose wey no too fine den, but now she looks prettier than LeeLee. #Achama.
DeleteMy daughter was looking like that, people used to mistake her for a boy. She's almost 3 now and super gorgeous.
DeleteMine is the other way round and I honestly do not have a priblem with it... it is the intrusion of total strangers that get me.
ReplyDeleteI was just complaining about this same thing a couple of days ago... A total stranger wanted to compliment my little girl and joined me inside the matterπ©π©π©π©π©
“Nwata makariri nne ya”ππππ
At first I didn't know how to respond.. Usually when people admire her publicly., I smile and say thank you.. Then I tell her to smile and say hi.
That one just weak meππππ Pele Iya
πππππ.
DeleteI get that a lot too.
They go...your kids are finer than you upon all your shakara.
And I go... of course nau, that's how it's meant to be.
Then when I hear those comments/compliments that goes, ahh! This beauty is not from you at all. I am sure this child of yours looks like the father.
I goππππ. All join.
I sha wor wor Abi?. Thank God my children no follow ππ
Iphim howdy darl and how is it going at your end? πππ❤❤ππ
Ah Bloggie you too??π©π©π©π©
DeleteSome even say.. Ah she looks like her Daddyπππ Like they know him!!!!
Toor.. Upon all my shakara ooh.
We have Pretty,beautiful,very beautiful,fine etc. Na to collect my own category na.
Iya, Watch that your girl turn into a stunner soon.
Bloggie I dey... this and that dey keep person busy.. How una dey?π
"Some even say.. Ah she looks like her Daddyπππ Like they know him!!!!"
DeleteExactly! ππππππ.
Ndi madu sef! I tire for them
It's all good though.π
Good to know you good.
We good here. Everything ai.π
Aha everybody now has a daughter that is finer than her
DeleteMarketing strategies?
hate it so much when people mistake my 10months old boy for a girl...
ReplyDeleteAwwww! What a lovely boy you have Stella.
ReplyDeleteHhahahahaha stella I can imagine how you felt.
ReplyDelete@iya ibeji just watch out as she grows up into pretty woman
Till tomorrow people tell me how my elder sister is prettier than me,of Cus she is but guess what I am a beautiful baby girl
So ko kon ayeππππ
Haaaa. Mine is that I combined the best features from both parents. Mum is so fine and dad is cute! They both carry eye go market in that aspect. Plus they are both smart on top,I can say I have the looks and in the brain department I am above average. Same with my youngest sister.
ReplyDeletePeople say we cheated the two siblings between us. I'm grateful for my face sha cos despite my humble background, when I dress up and go out, people just accord me one kind respect thinking I'm the daughter of one Abuja big shot. Lmao
Lol @ stella, they assume you are his nanny.
ReplyDeleteA client (very pretty) came to the office with her daughter, my boss looked at her and said, "ah I'm sure she took after your husband". The teenage girl have swag but........
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DeleteMy own problem is my sister, you will always hear comments like ah, your sister is so pretty, she's finer than you bla bla bla....that thing can pain eh, I just say ok sometimes and keep it moving, but at home my sister will always complain that I'm talller than her, even though I'm way younger e dey vex her die
ReplyDeleteMine is totally the other way round lmao, like people not believing I gave birth to my son. I am in a wedding presently and someone has asked me again if I birth this cute baby boy, soooo fair, chubby and hairy.
ReplyDeleteAnd that reminds me, a poster that said some parent bleach their baby that's not true because this my baby I use jumpo Shea butter with cancatin. Some said if the mother takes a lot of fruit especially water melon while pregnant the baby will be fair.I will send his pix as foihn one of this days.
The poster typed that the person is her friend and you say it isn't true?
DeleteYou use shea butter but other mothers might actually be mixing funny creams.. It is very possible.
Mine is my son, my husband and I are so beautiful and extremely light skinned, people used to tell us that our children will be so beautiful.Omo when I was pregnant I will always imagine how handsome he will look and I will just smile, I bought everything buy able. Guy I say when the midwife put my child on my chest after delivery ehnn Omo I weak oo, I was like who be dis? Very dark ehnn, I shock oo, he didn't even look like me or the father, he is almost 2 now and he has grown into a very handsome lil man. Although he didn't look like me or the dad.
ReplyDeletewell, I haven't given birth,but when I do I pray my baby is more beautiful. And it will be the other way round with the compliment like "I can't believe that's your child, she's so beautiful "
ReplyDeleteIt's my aunty who I am sure always experience this. She is very beautiful and gorgeous, same with her husband he's also very good looking and handsome(couple goals kinda cute). They dated since university days so everyone knew their marriage won't come as a surprise because they were so in love and cute together. That's by the way.
This my Aunty liked to bad mouth and tease anyone who was not so good looking and children were not exempted, including new babies. I myself had a fair share of her teasing, because I wasn't so cute as a child and my mum cut my hair too, and because I always misplaced my earrings, I didn't get any till special occasions and Christmas. So I looked like a boy most times and didn't get the pink dresses and girly skirts.
She was like a kill joy and big bully with her mouth and mocking laughter, sometimes it gets to me and I cry, other times I just ignore her and continue with my life. The incident I will never forget is before Christmas period, my mum had gone to shop for me and my siblings and we were trying our clothes on, and since my hair had grown a bit to a small Afro, my mum bought attachments to be used to make Bob Marley for me. And when my Aunt came and saw this she just burst out laughing and started singing "monkey no fine but e mama like am oh" and I just pretended not to hear and went about my jolly mood. My mum got so angry and said some things in my defense and gave my Aunty a hot one. But later that night, I cried so much and was hurt.
Fast forward to 2017,with my Aunty always stalking me and checking me out on IG, facebook and the rest. Always uploading my pictures on her whatsapp "my niece this, my niece that: WCW" blah blah. Because I am now what you consider as beautiful or gorgeous.
She on the other hand, have 2 kids boy and girl. Even though the boy is okay, the girl is far from cute. Opposite of both her mum and dad. She looks like her dad's mother who is not a bad looking woman herself, but the baby is the uglier version of the woman. My aunty tries to make up for her daughter's looks with pretty dresses and change of hair every week. But the baby refuse to comply. She's still not cute. She will be 3 in January.
I don't taunt her or anything ,but in my mind I low-key say "Karma is truly a bitch" But I have once told her that she's way prettier than her daughter and strangers may think she's holding another person's child.God forgive me!! but that day she was trying to be bitchy and annoying . My Aunty is even more beautiful and hotter now, still has a banging body body and flat tummy(she has always been Slim anyways) . But she's now so humble and quiet compared to before .My Uncle's wife that my aunty used to gossip about, because the lady was not fine. She used to ask why her brother picked an ugly and dark woman as wife,when he knows he is also ugly and couldn't wait to laugh at their babies. Mehn!! my Uncle's kids are way cuter and gorgeous and look nothing like their parents.Those kids are so cute and dramatic. They are always on my whatsapp dp, IG and snap.
I think people have expectations of how it's only beautiful women and handsome men that give birth to cute kids since children are supposed to look like their parents. But that's not always the case. Don't marry a person,(especially men that want to die on top a beautiful woman) because of how you want your kids to look. You may end up very disappointed. Because sometimes, it is the ugly couple that end up with the beautiful kids and vice versa for cute couple. And ignore what anyone has to say, love and enjoy your children regardless of how they look. Just don't make what the bad mouth have to say get to your babies and make them feel less of other kids.
Wow! You are so right about life and expectations...
DeleteIf your aunty wasn't vain, She won’t be bothered about her baby girl.
And about some kids choosing a grandparent to look like, this is so trueπ€£π€£πππ
Chai!! See God ooo. Lol. Very good for your aunt. Imagine even gossiping her bro cos he didnt marry a 'beautiful' woman. She must really hate 'ugly' people. Everyone is beautiful in their own way.
DeleteHow will she now feel if someone sings 'monkey no fine' for her daughter. Mtcheww. She is very mean.
Its true tho the parents' look sometimes does not determine how the children will look.
Mama Tee no worries atall. Your baby girl will grow into a very brautiful lady.
Stella your own good na, I will rather they say that I'm their nanny than I'm finer.
ReplyDeleteI have a big head nd it has affected my self esteem so bad cos people make mention of it....
ReplyDeleteNd to think that my parents nd siblings are so cute nd everything is in shape....
My parents are dark and average looks with average height, my num said when she bore me, people couldn't believe she birthed me cos i am so fairrrrr with large light brown eyes. I also grew very tall and very beautiful. I was told i took after my oyibo grandmother, i also have two fair siblings. Life is funny, i pray my kids ll be finer me and my hubby and also more intelligent.
ReplyDeleteMy dear, don't feel bad, your daughter will grow into her face, i was not pretty, i mean not pretty when i was a child and while growing up, people used to ask my parents whose child i was cos i totally looked very different from my 3 siblings then, bald head, brown hair and all, my dear, i am the prettiest of my siblings now, i always say, most kids who were born so pretty tend to depreciate in looks when they grow older, it doesn't apply to all though, so don't mind all those people telling u crap, see your daughter as the most pettiest of them allπ
ReplyDeleteThis was my predicament when I gave birth to my daughter, as soon as I came out from the labour room with her, everyone was saying 'fine boy, u no resemble your Mama. This baby was sooo dark and small, she weighed 3.1kg at birth but she looked so small infact she was almost ugly. I had images of what my baby would look like in my mind but na serious disappointment oo! Had to keep telling everyone she is a girl and not a boy, abi dem get plastic eyes?
ReplyDeleteShe's going to be nine years old in May 2018 and I already know I have a stunner, she's tall for her age and is a very graceful ballerina( that's our newfound hobby). My ugly duckling metamorphosed into a beautiful swan.
When my baby first landed I remember sending her pictures to MIL and hubby and I Dey hear all sorts , MIL asked why her face was swollen, hubby say “does she look like a boy”? Others were like na Blakkie you born o My head was on fire this geh that we went through over 24 hrs of labour together. Then all hubby family say na me she resemble as she no fine reach her brother, my first was very fair and a beautiful boy. Pained me a lot that the boy was finer than the girl. But she isn’t even 1 yet and people see her and are like wow she is gorgeous and all of a sudden they now say she doesn’t resemble me again now looks like her dad smh I still wish she turns out to be the finer than her Brother, boys no need too much good looks abeg
ReplyDeleteVanity upon vanity!
ReplyDeleteIrrelevancies have taken over so many minds.
This generation is irredeemably vain.