Emergency room Series - Domestic violence

It is better to walk away with your worth than die with it

A lady in her early thirties was brought to the ER by her neighbors. She was coughing, burping, very restless, sweating, and had bruises on her. She was said to have had a heated argument with her husband who hit her so bad.

She was said to have locked herself in the kitchen afterwards where she drank an unknown amount of kerosene in an attempt to take her life and she passed out. We were told it was when the husband peeped through the key hole and saw her on the floor that he raised an alarm. The neighbors helped to bring down the kitchen door and rushed her to the hospital. They claimed she regained consciousness on their way to the hospital. The husband didn't accompany them for reasons I don't know.


She was having difficulty in breathing so she was put on oxygen to help her breath better. Her eyes kept rolling backwards too. Shortly after, she started having seizures so she was sedated. We put up IV fluids to rehydrate her and reduce the dangerous effect of the kerosene she drank. She had cutaneous decontamination in which her clothes were removed and had her skin washed thoroughly with soap and water because she smelt of kerosene too. She was then covered up with an hospital garment. The doctors also preformed a procedure whereby her stomach was emptied of all its contents. She also had some medications that helped to reverse the effects of drinking kerosene.


After a few hours, she woke up. Her vitals signs steadily got better and she requested to go home as she had a young child with the nanny at home. She wasn't allowed to leave because she was talking gibberish and was a bit drowsy and we didn't want her to endanger the child at home. We also called for the psychiatrist to see her. The neighbors were really helpful and they contributed money to pay for her bills. One of them went back to her house to ensure the child was safe


An author once said 'No one wants a failed marriage, and no one wants to admit that they are not going to live their "happily ever after," like their friends and their neighbors'. The cold fact is that if you are in an abusive marriage, you are not alone. An unfortunate truth, is that many marriages are darkened by violence and abuse.

You can take relief in knowing that you are not alone and that domestic violence in marriages is far too common. There are many people in your exact situation, but there is a way out

Most people think that domestic violence in marriages only applies to physical abuse.

It is important to know that physical abuse is not the only type of abuse that defines domestic violence and abuse in marriage. Verbal abuse is also unwanted violence. Financial abuse is unwanted violence. And, sexual and psychological abuse are unwanted and unwarranted violence as well. The common factor in all of these forms of violence is that the abuser is using some sort of means to control their spouse. 

Many times, the victim is blamed for the terrible behavior of the aggressor. No matter what though, it is never the victim's fault, no matter what mistakes the victim has made in life. The fault is in the hands of the abuser as they have the need to dominate their spouse, no matter what they have to do to achieve that dominance.

I count the woman lucky to be alive. A lot of other victims don't live to tell their stories. If you are in a similar situation, where you are abused by your wife or husband, It's better you seek help fast. It was clear to us that the woman wanted to commit suicide. She must have been through a lot to want to do that. 

Also, if you have friends or family members going through abusive marriages or relationships. It's your duty to reach out to them in the little way you can. Love doesn't hurt.