STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
DOCTOR IN DILEMMA
Hello Stella,
My name is B****.
Am an avid reader of your blog and i love you for your honest opinions.Please publish my chronicle and hide my identity.
Am a lady, 27 years , a Dr and doing well for myself. I have a man (A) who I have been dating for 5 yrs and planning to get married this year. He is 12 years older than me.
Earlier this year, I met another man( B) ...he is 5 years older than me...and he totally swept me off my feet....passionate, feelings running high, can't stop thinking about him, when am with him, I feel butterflies...Note that these doesn't happen with Mr A....
Mr A is always busy, doesn't have time for fun...he is a workaholic(cant change). Mr B is the opposite....my relationship with Mr A lacks passion while with Mr B its a different story(I haven't started dating Mr B and I haven't given him the cookie) .
Now my problem is...am not sure if I want to marry Mr A any longer...Mr B is showing me a fairytale that I have always longed for. ....he touches me and all my problems vanish...
Again, Mr A loves me to a fault and always puts me first, he sponsored my education, gives my siblings allowances,he is never aggressive with me and he worships the ground I walk on.
Mr B is quick to anger and he has even told me he normally hits his ex gf.
I don't necessarily have to date Mr B but am not sure I want to go ahead and marry Mr A because our relationship lacks passion and fun....i don't want to be a cheating wife...please advise....
Do I marry Mr A and just forget about passion and deal with his workaholic nature? Or do I move on in the hopes of finding someone who would fulfill my desires as a woman...
So with everything Mr A has done for you, you just know he's not fun to be with? He gives your siblings allowances, sponsored your education and respect you? Lady, for the very last time, what did you need?
ReplyDelete*Larry was here*
What 'do' you need?
DeleteForget what mr a did for you he was not coerced. But I will tell you this. A good marriage is but on love , friendship compassion and consideration not butterflies and passion. The passion will die and what will remain? Marry mr a he is good for you. Temptation always comes right before marriage. I'm no superstitious but it happened to me too.
Deleteposter na see finish syndrome de worry you, ashawo
DeleteBabe, u are WICKEd!. U never saw all this traits in Mr A when he was sponsoring your education, giving your siblings allowance and all that. If u fail to marry him, just know that u can never be Happy. U wicked sha, do u know how much it takes to train someone, if he is not hardworking how do u expect him to have sustained u and your family?.Some men need to impregnate ladies before spending on their education, make u born like 2 kids first before spending on your education or family
DeleteStarry, I follow you ask her ooo. Madam, what do you need. I mean, can't you think logically? You just met someone who you are not even dating yet and you are describing butterflies and fun, dont worry, enter the relationship with him, the butterflies will turn to scorpions. And he is already indirectly telling you he will beat you.
DeleteSo you just wanna waste 5 good years on a good man because he is always working? I feel like giving you just one resounding slap so you read to yourself what you wrote up here.
He works but you can always talk it out with him and he will adjust. If he refuses to adjust, appreciate the fact that he is provides for you. Many women are looking for the qualities you stated up there talkmore of fun, as long as both of you comminunicate effectively, fine.
MARRIAGE is not based on BUTTERFLIES AND PASSION oooo.
DeleteWhen he was sponsoring your education and taking care of your family, why didn't you leave him since the passion wasn't there? Because you are now independent, you are now thinking of passion? How long does passion last in marriages? Please, na beg I dey beg you, leave that man! You don't deserve him. Self centered girl. Passion indeed. I am vexing on the guy's behalf.
DeleteKikikikikikiki... the world is full of ingrates... Poster so you wanna rock the boat ehhh... Anywayz all ye babalawos of SDK, comman divine for our poster. Ayam out!πΆπΆπΆ
DeleteSomething tells me you will not be a faithful Wife when the chips are down.
DeleteSo you wanna tell me after Mr A has spent lavishly on you, your education, family et all, you just wanna dump him to go after Mr B bcos of that? Romance?
My dear, you're one ungrateful element ever existed. If that guy were to be your brother, would you allow a lady do such to him?
Who fun epp?...
ReplyDeleteBia this poster,it's like your village people want to be san san in your garri!...
You better stick to your Mr A!...
Marry someone that loves you more jare...
Marry Mr A.
DeleteMarry a man that loves you more
EXACTLY! This girl's village people are very strong oh. So you prefer future wife beater to a guy that worship the ground you walk on.. Ha! Person wey do you @poster do you well oooh!
Delete@just Bella.
As in ehn!!! That is how it happens sometimes o. When you are about to get married,you will now see one guy that will sweep you off your feet. Where has he been? Please don't be deceived. You will be surprised how he might change after the wedding and you will be wishing for Mr A. Biko go for Mr A...stability and more love. Fun can be created. Fun is not enough to hold a marriage.
DeleteVery foolish somebody! Talking rubbish about her man,all cos she met a new one,I promise you,you'll loose from both end!πππππ
DeleteI typed first but it vanished but I care so I hsvr to say this. That butterfly will fade max two years of marriage. marry a. He z proven he loves U n good men are hard to come by. Not men o but good men. Butterflies ain't true love it's just infatuation. Just like U I missed marrying a good man a while ago. N d butterflies r no where to b found. Don't do this to urself
Deletelet's crown it all that, she is an ungrateful element. Somebody like her can never be faithful in her marriage when the chips are down if she gets married to any of them.
DeleteQuestion for the gods. You know the answer already. You are smart
ReplyDeleteHow ungrateful can u be, apart from him making u who u are today u want to leave him n marry a woman beater, infact u 2 deserve each other
ReplyDeleteYou dey find wetin no lost, continue....πΆπΆπΆπΆπΆπΆ
ReplyDeleteFor the fact that he worships you, go for him(mr A).
DeleteRead through your narrative and see that you didn't mention any quality about Mr B,you arebinly telling us how you feel about him
Your village ppl are at work o.pray and resist the temptation. Its better to marry a guy that loves you more than you love him
I m talking from a similar experience and i don't regret my choice at all
You don't want to be a cheating wife and you collected school sponsorship and that of your siblings from A. This smells like acid to me. Very soon you will vanish in acid. Your face will be so disfigured that if you survive, no one will price you again for life.
ReplyDeleteAnd B confesses to be a beater of ladies and you are "vanishing for his touch". Okay, maybe your sister will write the next chronicles because you will not see to write it.
hahahah
Deleteππ
DeleteAfter Mr A has finished sponsoring ur education u want to leave him.
ReplyDeleteGod himself will personally punish u.
... and she wants to leave him for a self confessed woman beater.
DeleteYes, poster, I know you said you don't necessarily have to date Mr. B if you leave A, but that's the lie you're telling yourself in order to feel better.
Once the coast is free and you're not involved in anyone, you will gradually get involved with B. The mere fact that you had to list pros and cons for B says a lot about you already considering him for a relationship.
I'm sorry for you, because you're playing with fire and you don't know it. You dated a man for five years and didn't know that him being a workaholic or no fun would make you cheat on him as a wife?
The death that will kill a man, begins as an appetite
beyonce hand for Princess Sche
DeletePls leave Mr a. Your life is not for sale
DeletePassion can be built na, so i think.. ure already cheating, its not sex that makes u cheat, how did u even cope with MrA all these yrs, its bcus ur attention turned to another man thats why the passion n love died, marriage is more than that, work on urself dear n open ur heart to MrA, since he loves u am sure he'd make ammends whr needed
ReplyDeleteWhy are ladies so foolish.
ReplyDeleteWhen b touches you, all your problems vanish? Really, he is already touching you and you have not started dating him. So when you start dating him, he will touch you and you will vanish. He will so beat you that no one will recognize you. Maybe, A will finally use acid to dissolve you.
the babe na ashawo... de touch de sweet her, na her village ppl i blame wey use her pic do DP
DeletePoster, I don't blame you. It’s obvious you haven't experienced heartbreak & disappointments, hence u taking a good man for granted while lusting over someone u just met.
DeleteYou are an Ingrate and maybe Mr. A deserves someone better sef, so leave him for real women who are crying everyday to God for a man like that. But on the other hand, witches like u are the reason why good men turn to monsters.
You are a doctor Abi? You just proved what I tell people all the time. Being book smart is far different from being wise.
I pray God helps me raise wise children rather than those who make straight As but are as dumb as f**k when it comes to real life.
That is how some of you bring curses on yourself.
ReplyDeleteHe sponsored your Education and all now you want to leave him for another?
Aunty, biko, free yourself from Mr B. Forget butterflies.
You're a silly child
ReplyDeleteWhy don't you ignite the passion in your relationship with MR. A
You lack focus and my die a gwegwelina if you don't take caution
Tell her oh very stupid somebody this poster, yeye girl.
Delete@just Bella.
Exactly Ideato!!
Delete@ Poster, all those qualities you feel Mr Woman Beater B has can also be evoked from Mr A.
Take Mr A to a quiet place and pour your heart out to him, this guy has been nothing but loving and generous, his only issue is being busy.
Do not let your village witches use your destiny for 2019 elections ohh.
Be warned.
Ideato you are right oo
DeleteIdeato I will agree with you on this,she gat no focus atall that's why thinks foolishly.@Nobi's mum where av u been??
DeleteKendrick's mum..... I've been here o. How's Kendrick?
DeleteHmmm. Mr A sound okay the only complain you have is that He's workaholic. Mr.B can't deal with a man that can hit at any provocation
ReplyDeleteIf u knew u won't marry A, why let him fund ur education?
ReplyDeleteExperience can turn a man into a beast.
Na small thing dey kill person.
The death that will kill a man begins like an appetite.
Honestly, I'd typed your last statement up there before scrolling down to see that you'd done same.
DeletePoster, if I were you, I'd regard this as a warning...
These BVs sef
DeleteIt's only when you lot have something off* or hard to say you will remember to attatch opinion* to it; so it will look like it has something to do with my moniker abi???
Una wehdone!
U lot should better stop it...
*sips wine π· *
Marry Mr. A not bcos he paid ur school fees nor give ur siblings pocket money but bcos:
Delete1) he loves u
2) he worships the ground u walk on
3) he puts u first
These are essential ingredients to a lasting marriage. it's safer to marry a man who loves u more than u love him cos he will move mountains just to please u but the one u love more, u have plenty work to do and it can get so draining and exhausting...God knows why He commanded husband's to love their wives...
nobody in this world is perfect. fact. even u sef. so u gotta accept the good with the bad...celebrate his strength and downplay his weaknesses...u can ignite the passion in him to d level u want...if he loves u, He can try...workaholism is a means of getting u a good life...he works hard and u see d result...or would u rather he is that type of man that will give u a thousand and one reasons why he can't work for someone and also can't grow a business?? would u rather marry a man who cannot provide for his household? my dear God don bless u finish...just go on ur knees and give God praise...B admits he hits women and u even dare compare him to A?? that's low. All the butterflies would disappear when he hits u one day and u get unconscious or die...the butterflies would disappear when u get tired of being beaten repeatedly and pack ur bags and escape( rem Mercy Aigbe Gentry) beating is a serious red flag that u shd not sweep under the carpet ooooo....u may not be fortunate to come out alive to even write another chronicle so Stella.
Use ur tongue to count ur teeth.
Haa
DeleteIs this where this comment landed?
Belongs to a comment below π
Anon 17:59 your Brain will not malfunction in Jesus name. Your analysis is so on point. Thank you.
DeleteWhy do women do this. You collect money from A to go for B. How else can you provoke a man? Supposing a girl does that to your brother, your son?
ReplyDeleteWhat is different between you and a paid whore. Sure you will say that the man paid for all the "cookies" he's been eating since your medical school? That is exactly how whores are hired. Pay and hit and they are gone!
Dr. hoe, well done.
Hahahaha @ Dr Hoe.
DeleteJust leave her, my children from her fathers village are after her. Chasing after her destiny, they have seen that she will be blessed with A so they have brought wife beater B to confuse her. If she's not mad, why should B even be considered an option? You can see that she is deserving of whatever she gets? When they are done, we won't be able to recognize the poster ππ
Move on my dear. If u end up cheating, it won't be funny. Just my honest opinion though.
ReplyDeleteSure this advice is from a foolish girl like that Dr. hoe up there. Move on after collecting money from a man for about six years.
DeleteSure you watch the clip of the man who shot his wife on the face a few days ago and called emergency?
That was how I advised my friend to move on from a man she didn't love but who trained her all thru Uni...this man didn't say a word when she broke up wt him...she just started losing weight and became very ill....from one hospital to another no clear cut diagnosis...we decided to move from one church to the other and it was the same revelation : the guy went and set up an altar in her name...he pours palm oil on that altar 3 times a day...with each pouring she becomes more sick...I pray God to have mercy, I don't want my friend to die
DeletePoster cold catch me as I begin read dis ur story...abeg marry A oooo...the heart of man is desperately wicked...I wish u could see my friend...it would be a lose-lose situation for u ooo. The guy my friend moved on to, left her n got married when her sickness defied medical treatment.
Hmmmm!!! God abeg ooooo
poster, take this advise at ur own peril.
DeleteWhy girls no dey ever get sense sha? You are 27 and this gullible? Mr B touches you, he's passionate, he's fun,he's quick to anger, you don't want to marry Mr A again cos he isn't "fun and passionate" you think marriage is all about fun n passion? Gosh! This story dey vex me abeg.. its clear u have given Mr B the cookie and his dick is deceiving you..i wish Mr A gets to know you and dumps your sorry ass before you do... mcheeew
ReplyDeletePoster marriage is beyond what you can see in a relationship. Shut your self inside and ask your self a question between the two who amongst them gives you peace of mind,then from there you can make your choice.Avoid pity-love.Wish you luck.
ReplyDeleteMy dear, just take Sexy Daddy's advice. Ur only problem is that he is a workaholic, arent u supposed to be busy with your own career?! See lemme tell u, u better get married to Mr.A,stop being foolish. A man dat takes care of u, ur siblings, adores u, irrespective of his age,u r here lusting after Mr.B, somebody dat will use u to mop the streets eh? If i say u r stupid now, u will say i insulted u ba?!
DeleteMadam Poster, why are you comparing both men? Obviously there's no room for comparison. My question for you is,What do you want? That passion you feel for B, isn't that lust? Or craving for a 'new toy'-something different! It will wear off.
DeleteHave you discussed with A about your concerns? Or your are just looking for an excuse to leave?
Please, it's marriage o! It is marriage! Not a relationship! Bottom line, does A agree with your core values and discipline? Deal breakers, is he in line/check? These are things you should worry about, every other thing can be worked on...everything you mentioned up there, to me is superficial! You can't have butterflies in your stomach all the time biko!
Yes Marry Mr A and add Passion to your relationship!!! I like the fact that he loves you more than you love him and I hope it stays like that.
ReplyDeleteWell I have a thing for older guys though but then its all about you babe.Marriage is one long journey and if you cant handle being with a boring guy then dont marry Mr A.
If It were to be in my power I will choose MR A over and over again for you because he will give you PEACE of Mind!!
You are a doctor and you lack basic intelligence?
ReplyDeleteYou just robbed A to go with B. B will so deal with you and A will take revenge. It is a lose lose situation for you duck.
Anon, when it comes to being smart about life, Doctors can be that dumb.
DeleteNa only book most of dem sabi
Receive brain
ReplyDeleteAmen!!!
DeleteMy husband is a workaholic,leaves the house 6am and returns around 7-8pm sometimes 10pm due to traffic!...
ReplyDeleteHe only have time for us during weekends and I'm not bothered!!...
Did I tell you he is not romantic too...
He takes proper care of us so why should I worry my self?...
Will being romantic and staying with me all day put food on my table or pay the children's school fees?..
Poster,there is more to marriage than all those things you mentioned about Mr B!!...
He is even violence sef Mtchheeewww...
Wow!!! Just got a glimpse of your sane side, so you can be this sane???...Sweetie, it looks good on you!
DeleteWhy should you bother, isn't he the one you chained at the babalawos?
DeleteThe day he will break off that chain, all these your theories will vanish.
Poster if you wise , abeg re-read queen comment make yu for borrow brain to even think say yu be doctor made your chronicle annoying.
DeleteMe sef look again to b sure na she write Ds. Keep it up
DeleteAfter you knock dead fowl and lizards in his head finished why wouldn't he yield to your commandπΉπΉπΉ
DeleteQueen that drug I gave u is working.i still have some if the madness start again.LOL
DeleteMy husband leaves the house 6:20 am and returns 8pm on a good day and past 9 on a not so good day, and 11pm on a bad day...he works Sunday to sunday...goes to work on Sunday, then sneaks out by 9am to attend church and then goes back...closes by 4pm on Sundays and on a good Sunday by 5pm he is home, other times expect him by 8pm. 11 months in a year like that...I only see him during his leave...some years sef during leave he wl still be asked to come that it is working leave...but now he shows them his flight ticket as he takes his leave letter, so that the don't bother to call him. he always takes his leave during summer holidays when kids are on long vac so we all travel out of the country...I feel lonely sometimes but I take to shopping whenever I feel lonely. I keep the atm card to his main account and have access to any amount of money whenever I need it.
DeleteI ve been doing this 8 yrs now and I have not died.
Queen is this really coming from you #idonbeliveit#
Delete*violent...
DeleteHnmmmm you don't even know what you want!! Radarada! Pls send me contact of Mr A. This life sha, when you marry Mr B now and he starts beating you blue black , you did run in here to write another epistle. Better hold on to Mr A o!
ReplyDeleteThe title should read "Foolish doctor who put herself in a dilemma"
ReplyDeleteWasn't A a workaholic when he was training you and your siblings in school?
Has he talked to you about marriage?
Ashawo bastard ingrate !! I pray he pours you acid . Idiot
ReplyDeleteHia..... Wat exactly do women want nah
ReplyDeleteHahahaha.
ReplyDeleteWhen will men realise it's wrong paying for the hoes' educations?
dont make a grave mistake my dear... after a few years of marriage, the passion tends to sleep or fall into a coma for a while though, then u both have to wake it up with xciting things, no matter who u marry, A B or Z... if he loves u this mch after several yrs, my dear ure a lucky woman, marry him or you'd wish u did later
ReplyDeleteYears ke abi few months, all these mumu passion would end when he has had enough of u.. even when dating someone that has sense, there is honeymoon phase and it ends, enjoy ur honeymoon spark and passion phase with B
DeleteOh, don't I just like how wicked some of you young ladies can be! Someone has been there for you and your siblings, he worshiped the ground you walk on and treats you like a "lady". But, you're not satisfied.
ReplyDeleteHave you complained to him about his workaholic nature and he did not try to adjust?
Have you told him what you like to do for fun and he did not obliged you?
Have you ever told him that he's not romantic enough and that he should put more efforts and he refused you?
Sometimes, women open their eyes wide and walk with their two legs into a trap.
Mr. B is abusive and he has already told you the kind of person he is but, you still want to put yourself in bondage because, you don't know what is good for you.
I guess you did not consider the age when he was spending for you and your siblings, you now suddenly wake up from your slumber and realized he's too old and not romantic.
You are wicked! If you make up your mind (which I believed you have) not to marry Mr.A, you will be miserable with that your Mr.B.
Some people will use their hand to remove food from their mouth and they will later be crying that they are dying of hunger.
Be wise else, you will be sending another chronicle in few years.
Mr B is a no no to me. fellow Bvs over to you.
ReplyDeleteπππ the people doing you wicked sha. See as they are using your brain to do pangolo!!!please go for mr B sho gbo, by the time reality sets in your eyes will clear and that passion will turn to sand for your throat. Passion you can create with mr A. Senseless at 27!
ReplyDeleteToo harsh please
DeleteGet off my comment then. Not here to please you. Swerve abegππ
DeleteWhen he was training you, you did not see all this abi? Follow Mr B so that he can kill you one day with punches wicked girl.
ReplyDeleteLmaooo. Another idiot. Poster, please, ask those married ffor 10 years and more if itss d passion that kept their marriage. If u like, marry psycho and keep for house. Na u go still run comot. When women are looking for stability , u are running away from it. In this age of domestic violence awareness, u want to jump and enter ?. My. Dear, I knw d kinda passion u seek; it's in d movies, it's described by faceless Bvs on this blog. It's experienced in real life by very few People. Mr A might not be it. But MrB is definitely not it.
ReplyDeleteAnd the passion they read about in romance novels too...
DeletePoster babe.. What you feel for Mr. B now will wear away..
Be wise
What's with this 'am' here and there? You either use 'I am' or I'm. You haven't given the cookie, yet he's touching you. What's cookie again? You shouldn't have mentioned you were a doctor cause doctors are respected. This your chronicle is a disgrace to doctors and to women...fish brain
ReplyDeleteWomen are insatiable. Dts how my friend destroyed her marriage all in the name of "he is too busy" and started messing up until the husband found out.
ReplyDeletePoster, why would you want people to advice you when the answer is right before you? When you leave Mr. A, dont send chronicles here pls.
First of all, press ignore button on Mr B maka na Ihe na aso nso, na egbukwa egbu. Somebody that hits women.. haaa!! That's violence in him oo. You can't walk right into fire with your eyes open biko. Besides from some stories, i think that Mr B type are always sweet and 'prince charming' from a fairytale until gbam!.. he HITS you. He will be sweet now so when he hits you tomorrow, you will think you're the problem. They kill self esteem faster than anything and will end up messing you up TOTALLY!.
ReplyDeleteMr A is somebody you need to talk to, communicate with and pour your heart to. Not cause he sponsored your schooling oo (can't advice to choose base on that) but cause his heart is involved. You said your self that he loves you genuinely right?. Talk to his heart, make him understand you and read doppelganger advice on how to get him to do things you want from him.
All in all.. Jesus fix this biko
But then, do you really love this Mr A? cause Mr B is obviously calling the shots on you eemotionally
NOT TO SOUND RUDE BUT POSTER FEAR GOD.
ReplyDeleteI HAVE READ A LOT OF CHRONICLES BUT THERE IS SOMETHING ABOUT YOURS.
KINDLY ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS CAN YOU EVER HAVE IT ALL????????
ASK YOUR SELF WHY ARE YOU INSATIABLE ??? A IS 12 YEARS OLDER THAN YOU HAVE YOU TRIED SHOWING HIM WHAT FUN FOR A YOUNG VIBRANT GIRL LIKE YOU IS LIKE AND SEE HOW HE REACTS. IF YOU WANT TO CONTINUE IN SEARCH OF FAIRY TAILS JUST REMEMBER NOT FAIRY TALES HAVE PLEASANT ENDINGS. MY DEAR DO NOT BE QUICK TO DISCARD WHAT YOU HAVE BECAUSE OF WHAT SEEMS LIKE FAIRY TALE. THAT ALL I CAN SAY TO YOU. THE MAN THAT TRAINED YOU TO BECAME SOMEBODY IN LIFE BASICALLY A MEDICAL DOCTOR THE LEAST HE DESERVES IS MORE THAN THAT WHICH YOU ARE OFFERING BECAUSE YOU SOUND LIKE YOU ARE LOST!!!!!!!!!!!! FIND YOURSELF FIND GOD AND RETRACE YOUR STEPS. NOT ALL CLOTHS YOU SEE THAT YOU LIKE ITS YOUR SEIZE .
What is all this, on top of that you're even shouting?
DeleteGlory, was Tonto Dike your course mate in College of CAPS?
DeleteHaba, it feels like you are shouting. Loooooooooooool
Make Anonymous Orubebe no catch you.
What is this bikonu
DeleteYou are looking for fun,dont worry when Mr B hits you back to back you will know what fun is.
ReplyDeletePlease leave Mr A alone before you start giving him problems.
You are also very ungrateful. Someone sponsored your education and takes care of your family and you are comparing him to an abusive idiot. Later when you are sending DV chronicles you wont remember you went into the marriage looking for fun.
MADAM FUN.
After MrA has finished training you madam, you want to leave him for a violent Mr B? Let me tell you, if you dare marry Mr B, you will be so messed up. He will suck you and your money dry, probably make you loose focus and loose your job, then he throws you out on the street. Why do you want to throw away gold just for a fairytale. You think fairy tale lasts? You better calm down and marry Mr A. Please don't try to sleep with Mr B,if you do, you will not have peace of mind. Take it or leave it.
ReplyDeletedidnt u feel same butterflies with MrA initially? that feeling settles my dear, when he finish browsing you, youd see his true colour, then the beating he talked about will come, ure 27 already with a busy career, wat time do u have to meet men? when do u think the nxt amazing man will come ur way? see u see gwegs loading.... u better stick to the bird u have at hand, ask ur single pals wat the street is like, i wish i have a man sef witout passion, cus me kuku know how to bring up passion, no enter gutter.
ReplyDeleteYou better marry Mr A. When it comes to marriage, passion should be the last thing to look. Find someone loyal, trusted, financial security, loves God. You better keep passion aside.
ReplyDeleteIf you dump Mr A. Mr B might dump you or the passion might die.
KING XOXO MYSTERY
Leave her, na mumu de worry her, her village people have vowed to make her miserable lolnd she's letting them achieve it , she thinks it's passion that people have used to sustain marriage? I pity u in advance poster, sometimes I wish I can follow most chronicle posters stories to see how they end up
Delete
ReplyDeleteyou are a wicked,ungrateful fool! Just do that evil u intend to do & see u nose dive into a tragedy u will regret all ur life!
where was the passion issh all the while he been talking care of u & ur family?
Go for MrB aka broke woman beater/abuser & enjoy d passion as well as the numerous problems . mumu wey think say she get sense. Its ur type that makes men turn to monster
hahahahaha see me laughing Chai. Linda and anonymouses make una sorry for the poster abeg
ReplyDeleteMy fellow doctor lady, dont let the devil fool you, those butterflies are there for a reason, to distract and mess up your life, most ladies face last minute distraction on the verge of marriage, good men are hard to come by, you already have one and cheating on him, how will God answer your prayer? if MrA finds out you'd most likely lose both guys and back to square one, there was a lot of good in MrA that kept u wit him for 4yrs, sit him down and talk to him
ReplyDeleteFellow Dr ladies abiakwa! Oturugbeke
DeleteLike you needed the title to make your point.
Hmmmmn all I can say is, I'm not even worried about you, I pity Mr A. Sis, truthfully, go for Mr A, you'll have rest of mind.
ReplyDeleteJesus fix it.
ReplyDeleteNa ur type de make men wicked oh doctor, imagine how he will treat his nxt girlfriend all bcus of you.... all his sacrifice and time with you, youve given to another man, na u know sha, put it in prayer.
So all the while mr A was sponsoring yo education and paying yo siblings allowances you did not see that he was/is not passionate? You waited for you to finish yo studied and all of a sudden your eyes were opened. Abeg shift, I have no time for ingrates. Medical doctor who can not help her own sickness..
ReplyDeleteDid you realize A wasn't all that when you met B or it has been like that and you had no problem with the way he is until now? My dear advice yourself. Why are you cheating in the first place? Once a cheat always a cheat marriage or no marriage. That's how girls get wasted for nothing. Not encouraging such oo..but it happens. Suddenly A is not good enough after you have become a doctor continue.
ReplyDeleteDear Poster,
ReplyDeleteWhat you have for Mr. B isn't love, it's INFATUATION.
The best advice I ever got about marriage that I can share with you is to ''marry a man who loves you more than you love him''- i took that advice and it has worked for me for the past 10 years of my marriage. My husband isn't perfect but one thing I never doubt about him is his love for me and his earnest desire to always see me getting better every day.
If I had to choose for you, I'd choose Mr A.
please be wise and don't get yourself into what you would regret later.
In addition, you could take time off the 2 of them and do some soul searching but i can tell you authoritatively that Mr B is TOXIC
All the best
It's better to marry a man that worships the ground you walk on. Mr B is a time bomb waiting to explode. Be wise.
ReplyDeletePoster, haven't you heard the saying "the grass is always greener on the other side"?
ReplyDeleteBetter water your grass and tend to it well, passion can be developed, I guess your mind is made up already though.
I hope Mr A meets Someone more deserving of his love and affection.
Poster, Give me MrA number, let me teach him how to be romantic, its for ur own good oh
ReplyDeleteI was in the same situation u are in earlier this year, he was 11yrs older than i am, i really was not very passionate about him too, as the time to get married drew closer i started making up quarrels that weren't there, i guess he eventually saw through me and let me go in less than 3 months he married someone else, its not easy to be in a relationship where you dont love the guy because everything he does will just irritate you, even when he is trying, but i guess there is more to marriage than passion, talk to the guy, sit and have a conversation, communication is the key, My ex wasnt interested in talking about the problems we had he just wanted to marry becos he was getting older, and i think marriage cannot be a bed of roses everyday but there should be days where you are geninuely happy, but in your case, i think you already know what you will do, you just looking for som1 to help you justify it.
ReplyDeleteYour case is very different from hers oooo. But no worry sha, another man go come you hear.
DeleteI have not even read to the part you said he told you he hits his ex before I started guessing he could still have some nasty traits despite his fun loving nature.
ReplyDeleteSo madam, u love fun plus beating. Its OK that way too at least the fun will take away the pains of the beatings when it starts.
Forget all what Mr A has done n is doing for you, love is not based on sentiments but Mr B is not worth leaving Mr A for. Mr A is a gentleman who puts his woman first,
ReplyDeleteMr B is a true definition of a handsome demon who gives you fun but disrespect n abuse you. I'm sure you don't want to end in a body bag.
Poster come let me rearrange your brain
ReplyDeleteπ..
DeletePoster you sure know the right thing to do, why all this many questions, Mr.B, has made it clear to you that he is a woman beater you are still asking us what to do, Go for Mr. A and ignite all the passion you know how to do, teach him because he might not no your soft spot.
ReplyDeleteGo and watch the movie titled GET OUT
ReplyDeleteThat should solve your problem.
Nigerian movie?
DeleteIf it's the American get out , then it doesn't correlate with this story
DeleteYour problem is a general issue among women. A lot of women don't know what they want in a relationship and in a man. No relationship comes with romance and passion. You initiate, developed it, bring a lot of creativity and romantic sparks into it. Now you are complaining a man is too busy working, would you rather have a lazy man. You are part of the reasons he is working hard cause he has people like you to support and take care of. Let me advice you and a lot of women. Try and do romantic activities with him. Take lunch to him at work, Ask when he is supposed to be on annual leave and make yourself available and off work too to spend time with him, Take warm baths with him in the evening when he comes back.... you need to make him see that side of him. You say he is a gentleman... you need to connect with him. Stop thinking he should be the romantic one. What stops you in taking the lead. I think you just want to have an affair by portraying he is the problem. The Mr B wants you cookie and I think he can see that you just want to have another dick experience. He will change the minute he gets what he wants from you.
ReplyDeleteBabe please please please dont let go of mr A because of your feelings for mr B ,trust me there is always mr B is only a distraction or temptation like the serpent and eve,if you fall for that your feelings you will end up with regreta and single for a while cause you will always blame yourself and cant trust anyman again for a very lon time,i will advice as a friend here please spend more time with mr A,like you said he worships the ground you work on,so tell him you will love to go on a vacation with him that you wish to spend quality time with him ,explain to him that since you guys started youve not spent quality fun time together due to his over busy work and its already affecting you and your love for him that he needs to start spending tine with you if he truely loves you,trust me one month with him will change your mindse,teach him things you like,be the one incharge of the vacation,be spontaneous, while you are there try not to keep in touch with mr B ,try not to think about him or call him,focus on mr A, P.S'never leave the one that loves you for someone you love cause someday that person you love might leave you for whom he loves, Be wise.kisses
ReplyDeleteWho fairy tale and passion help? Marriage requires much more than passion oh. Infact you both have to work hard to make it work. You are an ungrateful woman. After all Mr A did for you, you now come up with a flimsy excuse of no passion. Ask those who have been in marriage for several years if the passion still remains the same. there are much more important things in marriage than the fairy tale ideas you have. If Mr A decides to use you for money ritual, no one will blame him because you deserve it.
ReplyDeleteThis is one of the reason rich guys don't marry poor girls.Wawuya
ReplyDeleteNawa ooo... hw easily girls cheat n don't even see it as cheating... u vanish wen he touches u... continue. My advice go with Mr B u both deserve each other. God will console MrA n give him a better sensible faithful woman. Madam doctor fishbrain
ReplyDeleteIs better for you to marry someone that loves you more, marry mr A he will worship the ground you walk on, with time you can build up passion
ReplyDeleteYou are a confused idiot
ReplyDeleteListen dear, all you feel for Mr. B is either lust/infatuation or imagination! It's all in your head & besides, you & Mr. A have come a long way... As you've pointed out he's been you & your family's financial backbone. So, stick to him pls & learn how to spice it up, teach him, he can't work all the days of the week, I'm sure! So learn to work around that. Don't be an ingrate. Focus on Mr. A & keep praying for him. All the mushy feelings you have for Mr. B will vanish after you've been beaten black & blue! So wake up girl & do the right thing! Mr. B is all shades of... God bless.
ReplyDelete... Jesus is my worth!
Poster you are wicked, greedy, selfish, when he was paying your school fees you never tot of him being unromantic.The thunder that will destroy you us still doing press up.
ReplyDeleteIf you think you don't want to marry Mr A, fine. But if you want to end up with Mr B that confessed to hitting his ex and has shown you aggressive tendencies Hmmmm.... You are just walking into domestic violence with your eyes wide open. Be wise not all that glitters is gold
ReplyDeleteAny time i read a chronicle i met A, i met b it usually ends up useless like what i just read.See you see domestic violence mcheeew.
ReplyDeletePoster you are a fraud.
ReplyDelete*is
ReplyDeletei do understand you darling... but let's get something straight. Marriage is not a walk in the park.. yes it is to be enjoyed not endured but know there is no perfect man nor woman. Passion will not keep you when he beats you black and blue; passion will not keep you when all is not rosy; passion will not keep you when he cant provide for you; passion will not keep you when you realise he is just there because you are a "successful" Lady.
ReplyDeleteA man who worships the ground you stand will easily forgive your mistakes; a man who provides everything you need is bound to keep working just to make sure he gives you the best.. A man who adores you might not be able to show it, but his actions definitely speaks for itself.
you want passion, ignite it.. remember, you are in control of your emotions.. Book a trip, go on vacation, go on dinner dates.. Don't just sit down, complaining day and night..where he is lacking make up for it...
Remember it is Marriage.. just play it in your head, who do i see standing by me in 10yrs, who do i see standing by me when the chips are down .. A man who will go the extra miles for you or a man who is a boastful woman beater...Short term Passion or long term love
The choice is yours...
Have you washed "Good Deeds" by Tyler Perry. A woman can bring passion into the life of a workaholic. Discuss it with him and tell him what you want from him. Don't make the mistake of making Mr. B your husband. He is not husband material. Mr. A is essentially a man who expresses is love in real genuine way. He meet you and your family needs but you have to balance it up by bring in the passion and take him out of his comfort zone. If you want passion, show him and lead him on. He will thank you for it. But this Mr. B he will give you the beating in passion of Christ. A word is enough for the wise!
ReplyDeleteplease tell her....
DeletePoster you are very not OKAY!!! you need deliverance..ngwanu go and collect butterfly and passion with red eyes but dont come back on this blog with another chronicle of your DOMESTIC VOILENCE story....i will know if you do.
ReplyDeleteI know you know what to do and what is right..you just want to entertain us with your story...
Poster, Mr B has awoken something in you, it is called fire and passion. It will take God to douse or kill it. Don't mind BVs advising you to marry out of pity. What you feel for Mr A is pity if you marry him, and if you marry him you will eventually cheat or be unhappy as you are doing now.
ReplyDeleteYou are are a user, as you have said you are not marrying Mr B, you are going to fuck him and leave him as you will do Mr A. I pray You don't turn out to be used by Mr B before you finish using him. As for Mr A,plead for his forgiveness and God's. I pray he doesn't curse you or do you evil but marrying him could be hell if you do it out of pity.
You are a doctor, you really don't need Mr A's money as before. Maybe you didn't set out to deceive him, it is easy to feel affection for people who meet our needs so you thought it was love but now you met passion hence the need to move on. Still, you are a user anyway you look at it.
I don't think you are looking for a perfect man, probably someone rich enough but passionate in full too. I pray you meet your man.
A word is enough for the wise. Madam doctor.
ReplyDeleteThey are dancing Azonto on her head. Abeg poster leave Mr A and send me his number so I can comfort him during his heart break period.
DeleteThis poster want to enjoy both worlds, no matter what we tell you, you will soon fuck B and he will show u pepper, by that time you will regret your decision, I pray it wont be too late for you. Better give your self brain reset and IGNITE THAT PASSION IN A AND MARRY HIM
ReplyDeleteMarry Mr A and create the fun you desire. Mr B is an unnecessary distraction at the moment
ReplyDeletemadam a good man is had to found if i were you i will marry mr A because mr B is just a playboy who know what to do to a woman to make her happy, mr A is like a father,friend,boyfriend,and everything you can ask for. marry a man who will sit and talk with you when there is problem not the one and will stand and tell the whole world your problem...
ReplyDeleteHmmm.... you're actually asking us if you should be practical in choosing a lifeboat partner or emotional. And I go with practical. An elderly lady once told me that: your husband may not be the only man to make you have butterflies in your tummy, but he is the one who makes you feel 'Safe'. That Mr. B is not your guy trust me. As with every woman you will always wish your partner has something that someone else has. But when you put his good sides against his competitors sides, please weigh it well. I'm sorry, I'm not the butterflies in your tummy kinda girl. I've never been so I can't relate, I don't understand it, i don't see the point in the 'butterflies' thingy. I hate to say this on here for those who might misunderstand but really there's more to marriage than butterflies. You need a father, a friend, a lover, a fixer, a helper you can be a helpmate to and ALL the support in the world. A guy who gives you butterflies and isn't meeting up those marks shouldn't be faced. You complain he is a workaholic - he is 39 if he doesn't work now to retire early when will he do it? When he's 50? This is the prime of his life and the time when most men build. For the next 10 years he's gonna be focused on building what you and the kids will enjoy. Abeg if you think attention is more necessary than support, then take a walk.
ReplyDeleteππππ @lifeboat! This phone won't kill me. Please I meant 'life partner'.
DeleteWhen he has kids and nice home to come home to, come and remind me that he's a workaholic. Ifa hear say e workaholic!! Most young men put their idle testosterone energy in something. Some party, some womanize, some work, some even gym. You should be happy to have one who puts his idle time into his job pending when you give him a life that will distract him.
ReplyDeleteWon't cuss you out Madam bur truth is... Marry mr A... Jes imagine if it were to be the other way round, you would end up tagging him a user for stringing you along for 5years..come on gal, don't be a user and a loser... marry for love nat for fun and butterfly nenewi....
ReplyDeleteMr A is a workaholic because he took up more responsibilities aka you and your family. That goes a long way to show his amazing ❤️ My dear, If you are no longer interested kindly draw up an estimated list of how much he has spent in y'all and refund. Have you tried having a heart to heart talk with him, what have you brought to the table so far to help reduce the burden. Have you ever even rubbed his back or feet when you chill out atimes.
ReplyDeleteAs for Mr B, he has no feelings for you. You are just one of his numerous yet to be conquests, after he is done with your ass, he will pimp you out for money (its surprising you haven't noticed what's up His sleeve) or he kicks you out because from all indications, he knows you have fallen for him.
As for Mr A, kindly send me his contact. He has the qualities I admire in a husband. Together we will build a home filled with communication, love and understanding. And yes, he will no longer be a workaholic because we both will bear the financial burden. We will have time for tours and explore naija and anywhere explorable π. He will be showered with so much love that you will not recognize him when next you see him. He deserves a matured lady who will be there for him. Ask yourself: Are you that lady?
You are nothing but an ingrate,thief and a wicked being.Please go and marry mr b okwa it's passion and butterflies you want?what you looking for you'll get it,onyeoshi
ReplyDeleteMy darling, you got this wrong from the very beginning. One of the lessons my parents taught me is that on no account should I put myself in a position where I would, sooner or later, feel indebted to a man who isn't yet my husband. As a rule of thumb, while I was single, I never accepted any gift from my numerous "suitors" or any guy I was dating, unless I could afford it on my own.
ReplyDeleteUnfortunately, honey, you've put yourself in a rather precarious position. When it comes to marriage, I will NEVER advise anyone to marry out of pity or obligation. If after five years of being with a man you hope to marry, someone else pops out of the blues and he makes you question the relationship you're in, my advice would be to press the "pause" button on the plans for the impending marriage until you sought out yourself and your emotions. True, temptation may be inevitable but if you are with the right guy, you will be so well tethered to him that even if you met some dude and sparks run amok, you will enjoy the thrill of something new but still want your man. The "new kid on the block" will only be an exciting distraction and the feeling will pass eventually. However, if a guy you just met can mess up your mind so much so that you feel inclined to end your five year relationship, it appears the bond between you two isn't solid enough. You shouldn't be planning on marrying a man you aren't well tethered to, you will end up miserable. He deserves better.
I would have advised you not to be with either men but you've already invariably entered a commitment with Mr A, a commitment that cannot be broken without damning repercussions. You readily submitted yourself and your family as fruitful investments, Mr A has invested lavishly and is expecting a robust harvest. It will be a crime against the elements for you to deprive him the "fruits" of his labour. Sweetie, you have to go on with the marriage arrangements and learn to create the passion you crave with Mr A. Let go of Mr B, it wouldn't end well. The likelihood of losing both is high if you try to be too smart. You set this reaction in motion the moment you allowed him invest in you as a potential wife, and your family as potential in-laws. This is the price you have to pay, you must carry this cross as best you can and try to make the best out of your situation.
#e-bearhugs.
My darling, you got this wrong from the very beginning. One of the lessons my parents taught me is that on no account should I put myself in a position where I would, sooner or later, feel indebted to a man who isn't yet my husband. As a rule of thumb, while I was single, I never accepted any gift from my numerous "suitors" or any guy I was dating, unless I could afford it on my own.
ReplyDeleteUnfortunately, honey, you've put yourself in a rather precarious position. When it comes to marriage, I will NEVER advise anyone to marry out of pity or obligation. If after five years of being with a man you hope to marry, someone else pops out of the blues and he makes you question the relationship you're in, my advice would be to press the "pause" button on the plans for the impending marriage until you sought out yourself and your emotions. True, temptation may be inevitable but if you are with the right guy, you will be so well tethered to him that even if you met some dude and sparks run amok, you will enjoy the thrill of something new but still want your man. The "new kid on the block" will only be an exciting distraction and the feeling will pass eventually. However, if a guy you just met can mess up your mind so much so that you feel inclined to end your five year relationship, it appears the bond between you two isn't solid enough. You shouldn't be planning on marrying a man you aren't well tethered to, you will end up miserable. He deserves better.
I would have advised you not to be with either men but you've already invariably entered a commitment with Mr A, a commitment that cannot be broken without damning repercussions. You readily submitted yourself and your family as fruitful investments, Mr A has invested lavishly and is expecting a robust harvest. It will be a crime against the elements for you to deprive him the "fruits" of his labour. Sweetie, you have to go on with the marriage arrangements and learn to create the passion you crave with Mr A. Let go of Mr B, it wouldn't end well. The likelihood of losing both is high if you try to be too smart. You set this reaction in motion the moment you allowed him invest in you as a potential wife, and your family as potential in-laws. This is the price you have to pay, you must carry this cross as best you can and try to make the best out of your situation.
#e-bearhugs.
Poster u r a big thief,u better stick with what you have before they remove ur eyes for you...please dont send us any domestic violence rubbish when guy B starts with you..am pretty sure ur igbo cos na so igbo women dey wander about for money...am so irritated
ReplyDeletePoster Pls hook me up with Mr A I promise you you won't knw him next time you see him,
ReplyDeleteFoolish ingrate girl, with ur reasoning I doubt you are a doctor cos you are too dumb to be a Dr, a man clearly told that he is an abuser yet you want him can't you see you are a very senseless girl that thinks like a 10yr old toddler, @ ur level in life you want a fairytale marriage, chineke gbanwe gi cos you need it, how u wish u are close to me I would have slap off that stupid love from ur eyes
She is such an ungrateful girl, how can she even consider MR B That is a wfe beater. Better marry MR A. Wisdom fall on you
ReplyDeleteWhen he was busy paying your school fees and sending your siblings allowance you never told him then that you lack passion and I won't be able to Mary you. It is now that the man had already invested in your education hoping that at the end of the day, you will end up being his wife you now realize he lack passion, not romantic enough. My advice to you is you need to forget about that romance because one day romance will be off the mind of the both of you and you will be left with foundational love that he has for you.
ReplyDelete