Na wah...So so men wahala!!!
NARRATIVE NUMBER ONE
TIRED OF BEING SINGLE
Plsss I really need your advice and that of my fellow BVs...
Ever since I broke up with my ex last year July, getting a new bf hasn't been easy. The guys I like just back out or start caring less immediately we have sex (my hygiene is first class and my friends often tease and call me health prefect), while the ones I don't like or attracted to are always serious and want something serious..
I'm really confused here, why is it that the once I like or attracted to often back out, do you think I'm doing something wrong or I attract or like the wrong set of guys, or is my desperation having a negative toll on me?? Or I'm over doing things??
I really dunno what to think anymore.. I'm tired of being single, it gets lonely and boring at times.. I really do need your advice... bashing is allowed prolly it will help to reset my brain..
Thank you... Kisses
Men do not like desperate women...They sniff them out.
....................................................................................
NARRATIVE NUMBER TWO
AT A CROSSROAD BETWEEN TWO MEN
Stella, you are a great woman. Thank you for the good works.
I have been a beevee since like forever. Lol, but I hardly comment not Because I dont want to but Because I get lazy to type sometimes but I'm loyal to the core.
Here is my chronicle
I broke up with my ex some 8 months ago because he cheated on me with my friend and thought it's no big deal, so I dumped his sorry ass. So there is this person I'm dating presently let's call him Mr I. Mr I is a good man we met in my fellowship in school though he is a graduate while I'm still in school but everything was different with Mr I.
Stella, you are a great woman. Thank you for the good works.
I have been a beevee since like forever. Lol, but I hardly comment not Because I dont want to but Because I get lazy to type sometimes but I'm loyal to the core.
Here is my chronicle
I broke up with my ex some 8 months ago because he cheated on me with my friend and thought it's no big deal, so I dumped his sorry ass. So there is this person I'm dating presently let's call him Mr I. Mr I is a good man we met in my fellowship in school though he is a graduate while I'm still in school but everything was different with Mr I.
The emotions, the Love, the respect is just so great that I fell head over heels for him. But Mr I is seeking for a job and that's one problem. He is not financially buoyant.he is not a lazy person he puts his hand into one or two things and currently running a tutorial centre with two of his friends but he complains that things are not the way he expects them to be. he has graduated for 3 years now he studied PMT (project management)he is very intelligent.
he does some of his frnds M.sc assignment because they know how good he is at it. Stella, I can't even ask him for money cos of his present state. I have lend him money that I have not gotten back lots of times. He even feels bad that he hasn't paid me because he talks about it most times. Meanwhile before we started dating I met a guy let's call him Mr N, Mr N is a busy and rich man, not in the country. likes me and asked me out I said yes. B4 I met Mr I and fell for him.
Mr N hardly calls but make sure I never lack, and no he is not married b4 y'all will say he is. He calls once a while and ask if I need anything. There was a time I complained that he doesn't call me but he said he is sorry that he is so busy loosing sleep so his children and I will not suffer like his parent did and I sometimes try to understand him. But Stella I'm in a fix. I'm sorry I'm saying this but the truth is I'm trying everything I can too so my children will not suffer I cant be a liability. I'm in school and also learning fashion design.
With everything going on in the country what if Mr I can't find a Job? I will be graduating soon and yes I'd Love to settle down.
Mr N said I'd join him when I graduate so I can run my M.sc prog and plan marriage alongside. Mr I would love to settle down too but trust me, I won't marry a man with no steady income because we won't feed ourselves love. Please help me. Bvs please judge me but advise me too.
Stella your red pen is needed.
What do you need red pen for..it is obvious the man you want is Mr N,leave Mr I alone to find his way,he is not ready to settle down and remember that broke men can promise heave on earth,it is when they have money that their true character comes out...Mr N it should be...
Stella your red pen is needed.
What do you need red pen for..it is obvious the man you want is Mr N,leave Mr I alone to find his way,he is not ready to settle down and remember that broke men can promise heave on earth,it is when they have money that their true character comes out...Mr N it should be...
Poster one:
ReplyDeleteIf sex is all that a man can see in you, then there is no need to marry or date you;
Prostitutes in the brothels can provide that and their vaginas are first class "neat"; some of them
So look beyond sex; a man needs a wife with character and intelligence!
Repent and study the scripture and get the life of godliness inside of you and do not use your body to satisfy the unquenchable libido of silly men.
Speak anon. speak! No matter how clean and sweet the sex allegedly was. It means nothing and guarantees not a lasting relationship. Developing our character is the key. Poster 1. If you can't stay with yourself by yourself then you can't and are not ready to settle down. Don't rush off to bed with anyone again, try and focus on your work and find your own fun. Remember sometimes the best thing you can do at a time is wait, wait and build friendship and understanding with the next man, and if you don't get that, move on, another will come. Okay? Everything will work out for your best. Cheers!
DeletePoster 2. Remember queen and boss will always say don't marry a poor man, and I agree with her. Besides, you're still in school, don't go and have fever on top man matter! I also agree with Stella, you'll never know a man's true colour if you meet him broke or poor. Give Me I some space let him hustle his life.. you guys can be friends but distance yourself small first. Not because he's broke but because he collects from you and not pay back. He should go into the world and hustle and stop hanging around school.if Mr N has to give...Collect. It is in a man's nature to provide for a woman biblically, historically, religiously, psychologically and otherwise. All the best!
Poster 1 be patient and focused on building your life.
DeletePoster 2 I don't think either guy is ok. First is using you. The small money you think he has, he is spending on another babe. Kwantinu being the pay master. Guy N, something is wrong with the dude. There are things occupying him aside from business. He could be married though you don't think so, or having a serious relationship or gay or into swinging or something. And you seem to have no means of checking him out.
Babe do yourself a favour
ReplyDeleteLeave your desperation behind and move far, very far away from it. Men can sniff it from a thousand miles away.. And all they'll focus on is eating the cookie and running away!
Close your legs, open your eyes wider than an owl and search for the right man among the wrong players. I wish you luck in your search
@ibukunoluwa aka ibk.... we are waiting for your comment
DeletePoster 2 just want to hear from our mouth that fanta is sweet. She already made her decision and want to take permission from BVs to leave d other guy. Chill first, oga abroad provides ur need y u still asking d unemployed guy for money? U shud be paying him for servicing u while oga is away.
DeleteEnhe..poster 1 u said u r tired of being single? Then pick d worst best and make it ryt if not don't coman disturb us.
Annon 16:20 no comment😂
DeleteLet's do this tomorrow😂
Poster 1:
ReplyDeleteI don't see a problem here, you just came off a breakup, don't rush.
Poster 2:
I think you already made up your mind
Please leave theMr I , go for Mr N.
ReplyDeleteDon't make a mistake of using your husband as a boyfriend
Poster 1 you're obviously not ready for something serious. Men you like will continue to play you because they know you want them more than they want you. What you also want in a partner is more important. If the serious ones have what makes a great partner than you better work on that.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure the men you like are the ones that are good looking and can't give you kobo or take care of you. You'd never know until you try, stop going for men of your "specs", try some other type of man who isn't your type and you might just fall in love with a good and serious one.
Poster 2 A man who loves you will find time. Okay you are sure he is not married but are you sure you're the only one? No man is too busy to check up on the woman he loves. In fact he'd be scared someone else is getting your attention and will struggle to get it for himself alone. Enjoy the money he is giving you and it's okay to help a man but who was helping him before you came into his life? If you weren't in his life, won't he still survive? I'm not always comfortable with men who are cool with collecting money from their woman, especially when it's frequent.
Don't I just love you? You're real to the core and you always make sense, trust me I always look forward to reading your comments. More grace!
DeleteA million kisses to u darl. Apt advise to both posters.
DeleteThat being said, poster 1, evaluate your spec!!!!
Chronicle posters!make una leave person alone with fuck! Fuck stories. I fuck!he fuck,she fuck!nawooo.Go and read una bibles or go for an evangelism.Jesus will surely provide a boo for una!
ReplyDeletePlease abeg you too why is sexy in your name.You too like fuck
Delete😂😂😂 @sexy daddy me sef I'm tired of all these babes and man ish chronicles. Can a man send us his own relationship issues? Id like to read from men 😁
DeleteLmao😂😂😂
DeleteSperm donor dey talk, tankio for reducing that your sperm donor rubbish talk. Always wankin...Shish!
Delete😂😀😂😁Sexy daddy chill. When they drain their bf sperm finish they will now come to you after marriage so that you will donate sperm.
DeleteSexy "Spermy" Daddy... "in BLOGLORD's voice"
Lol
Must every woman center her whole existence on men. See my eye turning Mr I Mr N
ReplyDeleteLmao😂
DeleteLol
DeleteMy own with all these crossroads narrative is that, why do we always ignore all these female cheaters on this blog and we are always quick to nail the male ones. Abi is having 2 boyfriends not cheating.? Because if it's a guy that says he has 2 girlfriends now, some people would have condemned him to Hiv or hell fire as if they head the heavens judicial Council.
DeleteIt is well with you both....
ReplyDeleteCynthia Iyede how is you?
DeleteN1. Just be patient, d right man will come. Have fun and stop being desperate because what will be must be. N2. Stick with Mr. N
ReplyDeletePoster 1: start loving those people that love you or do you want to be unfortunate fellow?
ReplyDeletePoster 2: at the end of your Chronicle you answered yourself that you can't settle down with a man that has no steady income.
What else do you want us to advise you?
Lol @ ur first paragraph
DeletePoster 1,you won't die if you're single for sometime, don't peg your happiness on anybody's neck, if you're not happy being single, you won't be happy when you're in a relationship, but everything can't be going as you wish everytime.
ReplyDelete@Poster 2, I've noticed that most ladies that desires to marry early tends to get married late, those that forced themselves on any available man later got divorced or unhappy, because they put their energy on finding a perfect/ready man instead of building their own life and career. Face your studies and start thinking of how to be a millionaire instead of dating random men just because you want to rush to be a MRS
*Larry was here*
Your advice to poster 1 is perfect, she should chill a bit annoying build her empire
DeleteTell them!
DeleteTrue talk, tell dem
DeletePoster two..
ReplyDeleteYour problem is not hard at all
Broke dudes knows how to love and f**k, take that to the bank and grab a billion Naira loan lol
So please, please, please! Free Mr I the lover man and follow Mr N the busy/generous dude. But don't come back here later to complain to us how Mr N isn't romantic and caring at all.. And how you now miss your Romantic Ex Mr I! No try am ooh
And Yes! That boy and a bright future in front of him and he will definitely make it, the choice to stay beside him before he makes it is up to you. But make it, he will by God's Grace.
#okbye
Poster 2 your English is enough to scare the he** out of any man.
ReplyDeleteJoke aside;
What does Mr. N do for a living?
He can be outside the country and doing drugs; is it not this same "outside the country" that I am in?
And please do not think that when you get married to N, he will suddenly have "all the time"
And you that go to "fellowship", do you also have sex with these men?
If so, you are being hypocritical; choose whom to serve
Last yr July?? Its barely a yr & ure singing tired of being single, relationships shldnt be treated like a cab u board, if it develops bad tyre & breaks down, you hail another and jump in.... No!! It dsnt work that way, you'd keep entering "One chance" & ur pussy speedometer will be the only one reading, you need a break.
ReplyDeletePoster2: Alot of ladies are in this dilemma, and seeking solution in a blog is the wrongest move, no one knows ur xact plight here, ure wearing the shoes, at the end u'd still follow ur heart, we all know wat we want deep down, but denial & maybe pity for the broke guy wldnt let u admit the truth yet even to urself, u can toss a coin sha if trully ure confused on who to pick.
True talk atheist
DeletePoster two the first guy is just using you.. Never trust a broke man .. When a rich guy says he loves you he means it
ReplyDeletePoster2 my advice is, if you are 100% sure Mr N is so into you and there is a future for you both then call it quit with Mr I.
ReplyDeleteAlso helping Mr I stand on his feet it's not a bad gesture.
But do you think you will cope double dating? why fall in love with Mr I while dating Mr N?
At the end follow your heart.
Guess she's having the best of both worlds. One guy pays the bills and the other pays the 'bills'. To me I feel if she invests the time and effort she's splitting between both men on the guy overseas alone, she'll know much more about him. It's not enough for him to just keep sending money and no time to communicate. Has she found out about his family? Do they even know she exists? She might be able to learn more about the guy by getting close to the family.
DeletePoster one, maybe ur abunna no sweet.
ReplyDeleteLol... She sure should get Kaya!
DeleteLol@ abunna
DeleteThe name sounds like a fleshy punani/tohtoh
Madam Kaya
DeleteSee this Stella oh. Sometimes I don't get the kind of advice you give. Poster 2: that your Mr.N isn't serious at all! He's so busy planning for u n ur future kids he calls once in awhile??? U mean, he's as busy as a clock, he doesn't hv time to build a solid rship with you? You'll come back here and tell us how u graduated and years later, you're still in naija without Mr.N in your life! By then Mr. I's breakthrough would have come. You're tolerating Mr.N now cos he has the money. What if he was broke and hustling over there and he doesn't call? You'll be singing a different song. Instead of u to identify the man that really cares about you and grow with him, you're drooling over the one that calls once in awhile and dashes you small money. I won't be surprised if the money isn't alot sef. Better receive sense there.
ReplyDeletePoster 1 you're bent on getting urself a mam so much you don't take time to observe the men you meet and pray about them. If you like bath 15 times daily, those men will smell desperation all over you. Chill honey, the right man will come when you least expect it. It's not in your place to find a man. The reverse should be the case. Focus on becoming a better person. Work on yourself. Being single isn't a disease. I've been alone for awhile too, about 2years since my last rship and it's not been easy but God has delivered me from alot of men that'll have had me and walked away like they're doing to you now. I've made up my mind to focus on other things and let Mr.Right come when the time is right. Please take it easy. Better to wait long than marry wrong!
Lol@smell desperation all over you
DeleteExactly!@when you least expect it.
DeletePoster one -leave men for now and discover yourself first.....develop yourself and men will come rushing. ..
ReplyDeletePoster 2-this is not a chronicle. It's obvious you are going for Mr N.you just want us to give you the go ahead.
"but trust me, I won't marry a man with no steady income because we won't feed ourselves love." What more do you want to hear @poster 2?
ReplyDeletePoster 1.
ReplyDeleteYou need to cam'dan.
When you meet a guy you really like/love, stop going overboard.
Be calm, easy. One step at a time.
Try to form like you don't care but with tactics. Dont give them cookie too quickly.
Also, Love yourself more and love from those you love will chase you.
Poster 2, you are caught between love(Mr I) and financial security(Mr N).
Your mind is asking you to go with financial security but you want love too.
Tricky!
Both are essential in a relationship
If the 'in the abroad guy Mr N' loves you and you are so sure, oya naaa....
Me I can't stay without money o. I will just die but love must be involved...as in truly established.
👌👌👌👌👌👌 @ ur advise for poster one
DeleteY'all need to find another word to replace 'Cookie' in this context, plix🙅🙅🙅
DeleteNice one Stella!! So much wisdom!! Please do as the Queen herself has said. Narrative 2:the bible "Money answers all things"
ReplyDeletePoster 1, marriage is not a cure for loneliness cos you can be married and still be lonely or even lonelier. Fill the void with the gentleman the whole world acknowledges a friend closer than a brother.
ReplyDeletePoster 2, have you prayed about it or just working with your five senses doing Minnie Minnie mannie mo? N seems right but is he the perfect fit? That answer will come when you take it to God in prayer. There you will get a strong conviction.
Narrative 2:
ReplyDeleteTo add to what Stella said- Mr N it is o.But break up with the broke guy with sense.
You know the kind of lie he will believe so that he does not know you broke with him because of his broke state.
Just in case Mr N effs up and the broke guy later makes money you can still have a chance.I know a tad bit depraved but sometimes youv got to use your sense.
I mean how can he even collect money from a student.Geez, its like taking the small food from a baby's mouth.So he cannot hustle and have some pride.
Poster 1. When men smells desperation they take off.
ReplyDeletePoster 2. Go for Mr N.
Wen I tell some gals 2 4get about guys 4 a while n focus on demselves lyk me (been celibate 4 2yrs now) dey will say no. Poster 2 dis is 4 u, try n 4get guys 4 now n reevaluate urself n lyf, d rit 1 will cum, n pls stop sharing ur punani. Poster 2, its obvious ur mind is on MR N so concentrate on him n free d oda
ReplyDeletePoster 1, allow yourself to rest for men's matters for a while.
ReplyDeletePoster 2, you've already advised yourself.
#amuamueverywhere
Poster1 you can't eat your cake have it unless you want to go and meet God make he create your own man for you. I think your main problem is being overly selective and not desperation.
ReplyDeletePoster 2 they follow money you hear, better stay with the guy that take you serious now ooo if not you go enter half chance with your abroad guy whose income is unkown. You are saying you won't feed yourselves love as if you know amount loan dangote take start business.
The first narrative and Stella's red biro just reminded me of the man I passed whilst jogging though I had slowed down on brisk walk. The man just de mess loudly de go anyhow, he didnt know someone was right behind him. For im mind, e go de happy sey I no fit hear cos my earpiece was in place. Story.
ReplyDelete😂😂😂😂😂😂
DeletePoster 1, ur chronicle reminds of this song. Why are all the good girls taken every time. Can't really remember the lyrics and the artist.
ReplyDeletePoster2, u already advise urself. Nau.
It's joe
DeletePoster Two, collect one and give the other one to poster 1 and every one will be Happy 😁😁😁
ReplyDeleteLol. Funny advice
DeleteYou is correct... Lol
DeleteHahahahahaha! Cookie, you no well!
DeletePoster 2,you already know the answer,so carry on bcos Mr.N is on your mind.
ReplyDeleteHe is well to do..
Poster 1,may God direct you..
Poster 1 you sound so desperate that even your post reeks of it and men can so sniff out desperate women and guess what? Yup they smash and dump your assistance even if are minty fresh down there. Give your self some time off and find yourself first, enjoy your own company and be good on your own and before you know it you will find out that men will start seeking you out because they know you're your own babe and not a parasitic human being.
ReplyDeletePoster 2 you have already advised yourself so what else do you want? You are collecting money from Mr N you don't love bit is rich and giving Mr I that you love but is broke, you want to eat your cake and have it abi? You better stick with one person and make it work. Who told you you can't love the Mr N when you've not given yourself the chance to? Or that Mr I won't make it in 6months time?
Poster 1: I think you need to be single for a while, your single status is making you uncomfortable and that can come off as being desperate. That's why you need to deal with it. Am being serious be single and deal with your fears. It's not a disease, why are you so afraid of it. Sleeping with men up and down. Haaaaaaa
ReplyDeletePoster 2: don't even know what to say when chronicles is having Mr Xyz. I lose interest. Ma binu
Poster 1, tie your legs from collecting and giving sex...
ReplyDeletePoster 2, tie your hands from collecting and giving money...
Listen to ur heart dear..
ReplyDeleteStella's given you the right idea. Keep praying too
ReplyDeleteMy darling, take a good look at the subject or title of your story, because therein lies foundation of your problems. "TIRED OF BEING SINGLE." It appears you project this mind set inadvertently on each relationship with a guy you like. The difference between these two groups of men, the ones you like Vs. the ones you don't like, is the way you treat them. Men are genetically wired to "hunt", so if you chase them, they'll run but if you ignore them, they will run after you.
ReplyDeleteWhen I use the word "chase", it's not just about asking a guy out or giving him the "green light" per se. If you call him more than he calls you, if you try too hard to show you are wife material, if you find yourself always being the one who makes plans on how your weekend outings would be, if you get upset when he doesn't call or make one of the greatest blunders by calling to ask why he didn't call or take your calls... the list is endless. If you find yourself doing any of these "vices", know that you're the one chasing them instead of the other way around.
Sweetheart, you need to change your mindset and your tactics, or you'll keep getting disappointed. Just because you're tired of being single doesn't mean the guys you meet are tired of being single as well. You need to keep your thighs close, one of the worst things a lady desperate for marriage can do is having sex too soon in a relationship. It will only make her more clingy and emotionally attached, which will only aggravate her desperation. If you keep this up, you may end up with the wrong guy and be in a very miserable marriage. Don't go looking for a husband, let your husband come looking for you. Try to focus on other self-improving endeavours, your hubby will come when you least expect it and when he does, please don't rush him and allow things flow in the natural sequence. I wish you the very best.
#e-bearhugs.
You hit the nail on the spot.. u couldn't have did it better, you said my mind and more.. infact u are bae, wud love to meet u.. ehugz
DeleteGod bless you
DeletePoster 1: I can't help but laugh. Am sure with time you will learn from experience of Karma. You said you broke up with your ex, and now just barely 11 months guys have slept with you and dumped you and you feel so lonely. My Heart felt condolences dear. Am sure the guy you left must have been a very good guy for life to pay you back with this coin in a short period of time giving you such experience. Well, just forgive yourself and focus on becoming a better person. Learn from your errors.
ReplyDelete