This is what I call ISH!!!
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
WHEN THE MOTHER IN LAW LIES
Even insult my parents and family and I'm here praying for a reconciliation, it's so bad that he told me to go sell the wedding ring if I need money. He hasn't picked my call since 29th Of January till date.
If I start going into details the story is very very lengthy. I met him through an old friend in July n we got married in December.
I was in Accra n he was in SA,we both work n he told to leave Accra n come to prepare for the wedding n that after d wedding we will move to SA together coz he's got. Perm Resident Permit coz of his job. The friend that linked us, my husband n his mum went to him n stated saying bad things about me. I called the friend yesterday and I realized the things they told me the friend did were the same thing they told the friend that I did.
My family keeps saying it's not ordinary that I should keep praying but to me it seems like he only wanted to use the marriage to achieve something and he did....
should I just give up on this marriage and move on?
I'm very confused, the marriage is just 4months and have only enjoyed it for 2weeks that we spent together after the wedding before he went back. I know some people will ask if I prayed about it and yes I did infact I wouldn't have married him if I didn't pray about it and none of this was ever said about the marriage.
I wish I can do a tell it all coz I just feel my story is like one of the Africa Magic series, have only seen this in movies never knew it could happen to me....
*I know i shouldnt say this but this is a one sided story..what exactly did the mum lie on you about?why did she lie?why can you not approach her to make peace even if she lied?
Her son sticking to her shows you that she has a hold on him,why not sue for peace and try to work your way into your man,he doesnt really know you and you are probably right about him marrying you for whatever reasons you didnt say.
This Marriage was dead on arrival,too much gossip and them say them say involved...No love at all.
If you are ready to make peace then go to the mother and talk her out of whatever misconception she has about you,if not then ask for a divorce and move on!
If i was you,that woman no matter how bad or evil she is,I will make peace.LOVE ALWAYS WINS IN THE END.
You dont sound like you are crazy in love with the man you married and you talk about moving on .....This was probably a marriage of convenience!
Mother in law wahala. Let me just read comments as a single girl that I am.
ReplyDeleteStory is incomplete. What are we supposed to advice u on? Spill the beans so we know the gravity of the problem!!
DeleteMarriages these days... So so scary.
DeletePoster may God grant you wisdom to do the right thing.
Stella the adviser. U will make peace abi? With your mouth? Kikikikiki.
DeleteMadam poster, what is this lie?
Tell it all
Poster,
ReplyDeleteLeave now that you have not given birth!...
What rubbish?...
The foundation is faulty so this union can't hold!...
I hate men that listens to gossips and side talks...
Your man is not man enough!...
Love u Queen and Boss... u don't lie!
DeleteStory is incomplete.
DeleteNo Queen I disagreed with u dis time. As far as Im concerned d poster ve not said anytin. D wiestions Stella asked up there n many more must b answered b4 any sane mind can come 2 a conclusion.
DeletePoster if u need candid advice come out with d entire story. Ur marriage is not even up to 6months. What went wrong? Didnt u bond with d family b4 d wedding? Abeg mk o go chop.
Once Stella state here opinion y'all ll follow her , I'm with queen and boss on this. Poster we share the same story, my mil is one hell of a woman and my husband not helping matters. Mine started few weeks to our mil says her son can't do anything without telling her, I continue with the wedding and got pregnant d same month that's when began to show me her through colour we left the house that we rent and move in with mil, she determine whether we have sex or not long story short, she tells ppl bad things about me even insult my family, hubby stop communicating with me and my pple. I gave birth in feb, As we speak I stay in a room apartment with my 2mths+ old baby and they didn't ask for us bcos when I to rent a room mil said I should forget that I have a mil. So poster, don't waste ur time, he married u for a purpose bcos my mil do say that he allow his son to marry me bcos she tot she can control me,we got married April 30th last year
DeleteY'all should have a family meeting with some elders present.
ReplyDeleteWhat are they accusing you of?
Are you guilty?
If reconciliation ain't forthcoming, to your tent oh Israel.
We cannot afford a headache in this recession. Speaking in parables is prohibited on this blog. What do you want us to say when we don't even know what you are talking about?
DeleteI tire ooo gen Zod. I just couldn't make head or tail of it, so I declined commenting.
DeleteHow can we advise you when uou are telling us a half baked story missing a lot of points? Or are we now mind readers? My dear if you need advice tell us what happened and don't leave points out. Even if its lengthy many will read to the end. You just wasted space for chronicles today
ReplyDeleteE nor tiya you? How do we advice u when u gave us half baked story? You are in your own oo
DeleteThe lies told against you are of vital importance, after all that's the genesis of the problem.
DeleteShe also said the guy used the wedding to achieve something.... How do we know if it's a possibility.
Because of the blunder in the chronicle, my verdict is you are guilty and should please leave the poor guy alone to start afresh with a deserving lady
MrsBee
Thank u Trinity.
DeleteThis you sf husband probably needed the marriage certificate for something and am very sure he has achieved it and secondly you aren't bring truthful here because your story doesn't seem straight and not a complete one.pls more details
ReplyDeleteNa wa. You dont need to give up. If you want how to deal with this spiritually, oya contact me. Lests talk.
ReplyDeleteShebi you need your marraige back and want your husband to love you, no wahala, you will get it back.
What i am seeing is jealousy. Nothing more. Please be strong ooo
Chai,not everything is spiritual o.And Stella,what do you mean by 'you don't sound like someone who is crazy in love?' So if she's crazy in love,he should mess with her heart? Anyway,the story really is incomplete.But if like you said,they've told lies against you and your husband has refused to listen to you,don't you think you should move on? The marriage is still very young and hasn't produced and fruit,so you might just have to count your losses and move on...Shit happens.
DeleteStellz me sef no understand your assessment because poster nor even make sense at all at all, sam sam.
DeleteLong distance short term courting.... This is why I don't advise matchmaking....
ReplyDeleteWell, he got married to you and he doesn't even work it out. 4 months and he has given up? He's not ready to work out anything, don't raise your hopes?
Could it be spiritual? Maybe. But I think he just married to be called a married man.
I hope you are not pregnant yet.
Thank God for your life and move on.
You could also come back to fill the blank spaces.
Bipolar ure not alone. I detest matchmaking with everytin ive got. Even my male paddys know they cant tell me 2 hook them up. If u see me with my friend n u like her go 4 it. Nor pass bk begin ask me yeye questions.
DeleteMatchmaking works sometimes.
DeleteDear poster..
ReplyDeleteI don't know how to advise you here cos you didn't state what exactly happened between you, him and his mother! Surely he loved you before he got married to you? Surely his mother at least liked you before she gave her blessings to you both? So what exactly could've gone wrong? What did you say that was so bad, he has refused picking your calls since January??
Please dear, since you clearly don't want to go into details, then I'd advise you to divorce him and move on! I wish you well
Tongue tied 😕
ReplyDeleteInstead of sending in this,you should find a way to get you and your husband to talk about what's going on in your marriage.
ReplyDeleteYou both agreed to get married and it's only right you both also agree to end it if that is the only way you both can have peace.
December to April, is really a short time for a marriage to end. Phone calls and chats won't do. This is a marriage not frindship.
I'm also wondering why he asked you to sell your wedding ring for money when you clearly stated you both work. Seems like you've been asking him for money.
You didn't give lots of details, so I guess you alone and the parties involved know the entire truth.
If you really want to solve your marital problems then stop the dem say dem say attitude and try to hear from the horse's mouth.
Surprise your husband with a visit. That's why it's very important for married couples especially newly weds to live together. The first few years of marriage are usually the most difficult because both parties are trying to adjust.
You should know your man more than anyone else, stop listening to people until you hear from him and talk to him alone.
I don't know why you'd say he married you to achieve something and like I said you didn't give a lot of details.
All the best.
She stopped working to prepare for wedding. She left her work in Ghana
DeleteJust four months ? ?
ReplyDeleteBiko ejoor it is still my birthday ooo
Wetin dem dey call Etisalat sef, cos I know Glo is rule your world
0958 2382 0104 305 ////1069 3760 1282 129
#positivevibesonly #aprilbornrocks #teamcelebbrities #Beloved
Happy Birthday! May your good heart desires come to pass!!!
DeleteHappy birthday
DeleteMrsBee
Happy birthday beloved
DeleteHappy birthday Beloved
DeleteHappy birthday dear.
DeleteWonder when we april born go admit say we sha stuborn. Everytime we rock.
How do you expect us to advice you without an incomplete story.
ReplyDeletePls try to work it out first.it is well
ReplyDeleteU know tell us wetin u do u dey find advice...Who u gbensh?...abeg resend anoda chroni biko.....
ReplyDeleteEnd time mil
ReplyDeleteThis isn't how to write a chronicle. How do blog visitors who don't know you advice you based on this thing up there? Writing to Stella is anonymous enough so what's the meaning of you wish you can tell it all?
ReplyDeleteWhat was said about you and what was said about the friend that hooked you up?
You don't have a problem yet. You are just unintelligent.
Mtcheeeeeeew.
Gorgeous Miss!!!!!!
DeleteLong time. Saw your shout out really late.
How have you been?
You are hardly here, I miss your comments😍😍😍💕💕😍😍😍
Come by more. LOL
"you prayed and none of these were said about the marriage?" Said by who; pastors or Babalawo-pastors? if you actually prayed to almighty God, has he gone deaf? Has his arms been cut?? Why not keep praying after all, he said that "man ought always to pray and not to give up" Lk 18. Did God ever say that marriages or his beloved shall not have problems in this world? It is how one manages those challenges that is the issue.
ReplyDeleteNow you are suspecting that "he married to achieve somethings . .." Doesn't this contradict the prayers and belief you had before marrying him? Besides, looked like the "courtship" if there was any was too short and seeing that you were long distance . . .
Work out your salvation with fear and trembling; it is your duty and that of this man to work out your marriage
What did u do? If it's a total lie like u said, then relax, the truth will come out, but then, ur story is one-sided.
ReplyDeleteAbeg eye no hondastan.... Eye no fit shuot.
ReplyDeleteLooks like I saw a "fire brigade" marriage here. Ghana and S/A between July and December everything was over? Even firemen do not quench fires in S/A from Ghana; do they. You actually did not know this man at all before you married him!
ReplyDeleteGod will make it right...
ReplyDeleteStarted dating in July and got married in December?
ReplyDeleteWait first...no let me hand this over to my ancestors but I hope you're not one of those people that call people gwegs here?
Na dem na.
DeleteWork it out lady.
ReplyDeleteDo not pay attention to every word people say, or you may hear your servant cursing you-- Eccl. 7:21
Meet and hear from all involved and do not listen to "they said . . ." else you'd pack up your marriage before it begins
Do not pay attention to every word people say, or you may hear your servant cursing you--
ReplyDeleteEccl. 7:21
this was how my mother in law showed me shege and almost broke my marriage, but thank God that last last my marriage survived the storm
ReplyDeleteWhat else can I say. Stella has said it all. So much love and respect for you Mrs korkus
ReplyDeleteMy fave segment. Hi BVs, BVNs and beeveeleons. Lol. Crazy day so i just thought to pop in.
ReplyDeleteI'm not enjoying this chronicle. Bring us the deets or forever hold your peace. In essence, what I'm saying is if your marriage clocks 1 year thank Jehovah Nissi. Cos na wetin we dey see these days be this one.
Hmmm .... Another set of confused adults. Who are desperate to rush into marriage. Here is my humble opinion. Like Stella pointed out what the lie was and it seems are not really into the guy. Now looking at the relationship foundation I say am not surprised. You met someone in July and got married in December. Barely 6 months. And to make matters worse you stay in Ghana and he is in SA. Why the hurry? And how come your MIL knows so much about you that he could easily tell his son lies about you and your husband believes her. Do you stay in Ghana with your MIL? I have always said it that Marriage is the end product of a process not the beginning. For you to have a good marriage take off you must go through the process of friendship,dating,courtship,engagement and finally MARRIAGE. And trust me you can't rush through this process in 6months cause it's meant for the two of you to study,observe,understand and fuse into ONE. Before coming before all to declare the oneness. Like Stella said it's a relationship dead on arrival. I will advice you stay back in Ghana continue your life and career and see if he is really bent on making the marriage work. Let him sweat for it cause you gave him cheap and I hate to sound hard but you painted a picture of a desperate woman wanting to settle down at all cost with any man. If he is not interested then separation then divorce is an option. It's too much drama for a marriage that is barely 6 months old. You both strangers and any third party can easily manipulate things between you. You know nothing about your husband,his family and friends. With my years of marriage experience and am not playing GOD here and with the way you have left out a lot of vital information I don't think it can work......Kolewerk!!! The earlier you move on the better for you.
ReplyDelete@Olivia, I totally agree with you that am far too kind. You just ask the most important question....Does she even know his middle name. I doubt if the first name he gave her is real sef.
DeleteWhat exactly are they saying about you? Is there any atom of truth in those things? Your husband should be bold enough to tell you on phone he doesn't want you anymore if really he has got what he wants from the union. Your people should be able to go meet his and settle or dissolve this thing you guys call marriage. You should have made the story lengthy maybe it would have given real ideas into this brouhaha.
ReplyDelete4 Months?? The story is not complete so I'm finding it difficult to understand.... Fight for your home.
ReplyDeleteJesus please fix it. I completely agree with Stella...there's more to it than what you just narrated... Come out plain and tell us what really happened so as to advice you..
ReplyDeleteLong distance relationship, started dating July and married in December. Do you people even know eachother at all? And you've only spent 2weeks straight together.
ReplyDeleteYou both need to talk face to face, this is no phone matter. I hope you even know were your husbands stays?
Take a month off work, go and see him unannounced since he isn't picking your calls.
All his family plus friends cant hate you. Look for one that is friendly with you that he also listens to.
Apologise for any wrong you've done. Don't go there fighting and don't go there to get pregnant.
If after all the apology and talking through and he still doesn't want you.
pls move on, because you've done all you can. and no one can come out tomorrow and say you didn't fight for your marriage.
Happy birthday beloved! 💋💋
ReplyDeleteOya eeeeee😂😂😂
DeleteThis is what I call gobeeee marriage.
ReplyDeletePoster......to me the marriage was rushed. How do you meet a man in July and got married to him in December. Habaaaa.......that's to fast for a long distance relationship.
My advice for you is that since you're already married to him, you need to calm down and find a way to befriend the your mother in law. Maybe you have to come to her house and stay for sometime so that she can know you better. She's the one that will talk to your hubby and smoothen whatever trouble she started.
Also try calling your hubby and beg him to forgive you whatever it is you've done. To me it looks like there's no love in this relationship from the beginning. May God help you on how to go about this.......e-hug dear
July to december,sa to gh,u married a stranger.
ReplyDeleteJuly to december,sa to gh,u married a stranger.
ReplyDeleteHalf-baked story...You just painted your MIL fast, what if she was right about you since you refused to say what you did or still doing in Ghana. My dear which work are you doing in Ghana that you can't sort things out with his family?
ReplyDeleteAs far as I am concerned, you have said nothing.
ReplyDeleteSorry, you have to go into detail and tell us exactly what happened so we can be able to advice you. I cant say anything till then.
ReplyDeleteHmmm another MIL ishoro..nne if u not happy there take a que from johnny walker..keep walking..even bible says his gifts added not sorrows but riches n glory..#nufsaid
ReplyDeleteHappy birthday beloved🎉🎉🎉🎉
ReplyDeleteMarriage takes 2 to work, if you can't get your hubby to talk to you one on one , then look for a clergy or a counsellor(who doesn't know you or hubby personally) that can bring him to talk to you, both of you 'll voice your heads out to the neutral person(don't invoke family pips,it only prolongs and worsen matter) If that still don't work then I guess you both know what next to do!
I have learn not to advice people here with one sided story.Not until I hear from other side
ReplyDeleteis well.
ReplyDeleteYou don't need to offend some mother in law before lieying against someone,I just stop crying since Wed ,my mothet in law lied against me that when she came checking on me and the children when his son traved 3years ago that he met a man which tied a towel and singlet alone,mind you I just had a baby less than a month and I was also at home with my maid and my other children 10 and 8years old. It happened that a form was sent from office for my promotion infact my colleagues and I were filling the form outside in the corridor when mama came so that he could return it back same day and immediately mama came I showed her the form we were filling and introduced my colleaques to her. So you can imagine my shock wen I head about the lies that mama told one of his son that mama was crying when she got home that but me I 've already begged her not to tell my husband but she swore that her son must take another wife and she has done that diabolically but God just revealed the route of all the problem that I 've been facing for years. Mind you,I took care of this woman wen she comes for 10days when I first out to bed but she complained to my maid that I have her big meat and i changed it to 4 medium size the second day and she complained again that I served her like a dog. God knows that I was never for one day be rude to get I always buy her things and respect her alot.But I can't even ask her cos the person she told actually told me in private .But God of Moses and Elijah will fight for me except if anything that's even close to the lies she told actually happened
ReplyDeletePoster ...your marriage is still too young , meet your mother in-law since she and your husband are not happy with you.. talk sense into her..i pray she reason with you if not waka
ReplyDeleteMy dear, I feel your pain cos I had same issue when I married hubby, Infact my colleague who happens to kno hubby told him terrible things about my past all to persuade him not to marry me and this is someone I had so much regard for and who comes to my face to act nice, little did I know that unprintable things were said aganist me.
ReplyDeleteMy advice, tell your hubby all about your past, make him realise you were never a saint. Gain the heart of your man an his mum would follow. Never the less pray sis cos devil uses people you least expect to spoil your happiness.
But first of all bare ur past to your man and if he is man enough he will let go. It's better he hears if from you than getting to know from outsiders.
My dear, there's a lot u ain't saying. First, are u a Nigerian or Ghanian? Second, where are your in-law's? Third, what did they tell your friend (the introducer) that u did and vice versa?. Fourth, what is your MIL accusing u of? It might appear funny but d woman might not be lying. Maybe she told her son ( your husband) u did or is doing what she actually heard from a reliable source that u did/doing. I advice u use that your mutual friend to reach out to him since u both have realized u were lied against. Though this your story is so one sided sha...
ReplyDelete