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Wednesday, March 22, 2017

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative...

Hmmm,this is a cross road.



STAND ALONE NARRATIVE....
CHOOSING BETWEEN TWO MEN...

Hi Stella,
Thank you for the work you put in. This is a blog family like no other. I am sending this to get words of wisdom.

I am 30 and professionally fulfilled by God's grace. Early last year, I dealt with the worst heartbreak. I didn't know how I would meet a man and start all over. I tried SnM but e no pay me. So I turned to God.

Shortly after, I met a guy- Mr. A through a job I did. He's my spec. We practically starred at each other. I had to ask for his number. We chatted for months but he wouldn't ask me out on a date. I summoned courage to invite him for an event and the rest is history. He is a 29, caring, funny, hardworking, carefree and tolerates all my excesses.

 I had decided he was my answered prayer till Mr. B contacted me. 


It started as an innocent conversation that lasted all night. I never expected to grow fond of him.
Our calls lasted hours and we had lots to talk about. This is something I lacked with Mr. A who loves to have fun and hangout but I always thought the conversation was missing.


Mr. B is an old school mate, 34, buoyant, a wordsmith, focused, caring and has a PhD. We live in different states but he agreed to relocate. He says he wouldn't want my career to suffer since he is the one who came for me, he should do the moving not me. I found this to be selfless cos I had turned down suitors cos of distance. We had met a couple of times and it was fun even though he is an introvert.


Honestly, my heart wants Mr. A cos of his fun loving side plus he is my spec. But my head tells me Mr. B it is. I love both of them and I haven't given any the cookie, thanks to lessons from this blog so no need for insults. I only decided not to put my eggs in one basket *side eyes at queen*


It is time to choose now as they both want to start marital rites. Help me make a decision please. Biko Stella, use your red pen. Thanks!



*Communication in a relationship is VERY IMPORTANT.

Since you are confused about both men,look out for the one whom you are free with,can make conversation with,can say your mind without feeling trapped or have someone say you were rude.


148 comments:

  1. Your heart surely knows who you want, i would rather you follow your heart.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Poster I will tell u to choose communication which is B... but anyone u choose abeg send me d one that's left number abeg..lool

      Delete
    2. Poster please go with Mr B
      But pray 🙏 to GOD about it

      Delete
    3. Poster use your head and not your heart.

      Delete
    4. Hahahahaha trolling baby Weldon Ma!😂😂😂

      Delete
    5. I go with Mr A
      But unfortunately for me, you are the one to make d choice.

      Being a wordsmith doesn't guarantee u will be a good spouse. You are obviously smitten by Mr B swagger and his educational status. He cannot be a good communicator and also an introvert @same time.

      Also, you dont love them both. U love Mr A but infatuated to Mr B.

      #itriedmybestanalysingthis

      Delete
    6. Am not too comfortable helping people to decide when it comes to matters of the heart. But this is my humble suggestion as a man who has been married for 17 yrs. Communication is key in any relationship and since Mr B and you connect on that I say it's a plus. You are Older than Mr A do you think he is matured enough to handle the situation. Women like to be naughty atimes and just want to be pampered because the man is older and they expect you to understand that they are like your younger sister. Can you add the age issue to one of the long list of things you will disagree about. Marriage is not about hanging out it's about hanging in and holding on. Do you think Mr A is ready to hang in or still wants to play the "boys field". You practically ask Mr A out in the first place I hope he doesn't see you as someone desperate to settle down even if he has never mentioned it. Can you handle his circle of friends who will be mostly younger than you. Mr B looks more promising but you also need to be careful. How solid is he in his career. He seems he is ready to relocate easily. I hope he won't use that against you and say you more into your career. In conclusion I would say tilt a bit towards Mr B but have a conversation on the following and it might just show who is matured and ready for marriage. .. Career, finances,starting a family, Developmental plan and Let them tell you your shortcomings. You see maturity, wisdom and experience in their answers. I know you are a wise woman. With all these in hand you take it to God in prayer. You surely get your answer.

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    7. You are indeed a wise man.

      Tee

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    8. Anon 20:26,u couldn't have said it better..poster stick with this advice

      Delete
    9. U Made a point.based on analysis Mr B does not have a stable career,what kind of man is willing to dump his job all because of love.

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    10. @anon20:26 who are u? Can we be friends? I love your words of wisdom

      Delete
    11. Poster take this advice

      Delete
    12. That comment up there couldn't have been said any better. Absolutely echoed my thoughts. Poster...stick with it mbok. Bros, can we be friends? As someone who is getting married soon, I need all the advice I can get. I'd appreciate getting your contact info. Thanks in anticipation. 17years married nor be beans. Wehdone Sir

      Delete
    13. @vivilious if a person is into more than one relationship at a time, he/she is cheating wheather she gives the cookies or not

      Delete
    14. @34 he has his phd, he is bouyant, he is ready to relocate for love......... I smell rat

      Delete
    15. At 29 he is caring, funny, hardworking, carefree and tolerate my excesses...... to me poster that is what I call husband

      Delete
    16. Poster just so we clear know that you are cheating on both of them... whether you are celibate or not....except if u all agree not to be exclusive

      Delete
    17. Poster what happened in your last relAtionship that went south? Do u c any trait of issues in last relationship that made it go south in any of these new guys? I will help in your decision making

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    18. Na u toast Mr A nah biko stick with Mr B.

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    19. And ladies on the blog I fear una.. can we be friends with a married man? Yeye dey smell for una body.
      Ashewo kobokobo!!!

      Delete
    20. Am Anon 20:26...How do I get an ID. And thanks @anon 7:41.....won't mind being a friend. And marriage is a sign of growth so see it as a major project that will define your existence. Not a bed of roses but it's WORTH all the stress. I wish you the best and greetings to the lucky lady. And @ Ladybosschick thanks for the compliment. Hopefully when I get an ID we get to talk more.

      Delete
  2. You turned to God when things did not work your way. Now, let's assume God almighty gave you an open door and you don't know which, why not turn to him again; in prayer and fasting and his word? Has that God "died"? Why do folks only turn to God when they have problems?
    Since God is our father in heaven, why not relate with him as a father? Hope you do not open legs and scatter everything?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Exactly!!!!!!!!, God is not an author of confusion, he will help you make the right choice, talk to me. But based on what you said, I think B is the better choice. Talk to God.

      Delete
    2. Exactly!!!!!!!!, God is not an author of confusion, he will help you make the right choice, talk to me. But based on what you said, I think B is the better choice. Talk to God.

      Delete
    3. How did you miss the part where she said she havn't slept with either of them?

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    4. Anon God bless you my thoughts exactly. Turn to that same God for direction cos if you make a decision that is not God inspired you will miss it.

      Delete
    5. Please pray and ask God to direct!

      Delete
  3. My dear marry the two of them now. If toyin tomatoes can marry 2 men why not you.

    Go for the one with good communication and better money

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That will be polyandry and it's illegal in Nigeria, only legal in some parts of India..you sef😅😅😅😅😅

      Delete
  4. Maturity is paramount!
    Choose the one that is mature, no becos of fun follow one smally that will screw u mercilessly and go for his mates later, u asked him out, u made d first move so, go figure!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Good as you don't want to put all the eggs in one basket lol
    Kindly be on the lookout for MR C who will have everything you will need in a man 😂😂

    Mr A sounds like a playboy! Beware of heartbreak

    Mr B sounds like a brokeass. I mean why would he even think about moving if he has a good paying job or an established business in the state where he is? Very sweet of him thinking of moving just to be closer to you.. But nne shine your eyes
    *side eyes*

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Exactly my thot poster,please take this Advice oh,this is what I wanted to write ....beware oh! I'm certain ,non of them is ur husband

      Delete
    2. U are the only one tinking here. Mr B is just a smooth talking broke ass.

      Delete
    3. Becky divine and cohort, scroll up and read where she wrote that Mr B is buoyant. Which means he's financially secure 🙄

      Delete
    4. My dear u hit am.wai will he want to move bikonu and start all over again hunting 4 a job? Na so e easy reach? Okweya! Babe think well ooo. He's moving no shit. I bet u.

      Delete
    5. You get mouth jare
      PHD holder willing to move to convince a lady

      Ladies are easily swayed by what they hear .... Men are moved by what they see. I just hope u r buitiful sha cos dis wahala no be here

      Delete
    6. Thanks so much. You mirrored my thought. 😘

      Delete
    7. You guys are thinking. I raised an eyebrow about the moving part. Some men will promise you heaven and earth just to get what they want. Pls only the Holy Spirit can show you the way.

      Delete
  6. The first thing that endears me to a man is the conversation I have with him. His sense of humor, his ability to make me feel comfortable like I'd known him my whole life, to make me feel easy about telling him anything, especially those wild fantasies every good girl sometimes have. And he doesn't judge but delves into his own too.
    If a man has got education, a good job, is God fearing, and really into you, then what you need are the things I've stated above.
    But don't tell any off, till one puts a ring on it officially. Your heart already chose, follow your heart.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Please Mr.A it is...!!! But hope he doesn't feel somehow about the age difference.. I kinda want Mr.A.
    Mr.B has probably sensed something about you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ola wealth,you want mr A? Are you the poster?

      Delete
    2. How wiil poster A leave his work and everything...!! He knows you gat the Doe..!! That's my thought ooo

      Delete
  8. Ladies you people are trying, because when a man comes to you confessing love, you don't know if the love is true until you try. Unlike men, once he approach a woman, he knows his real intention (either to knack and run or come to stay)
    Ladies I raise Beyonce hand for una.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lols @Knack and run. Doroknacker!

      #DontQuoteMe

      Delete
    2. Lols @Knack and run. Doroknacker!

      #DontQuoteMe

      Delete
  9. Now, you have "put your eggs in two baskets" and you are confused; foolish sheeeple of queer and boos. That is how gullible a lot of girls are. Very soon, the two men will discover themselves and you will lose all and send in a chronicle of depression!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Looooooool!

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    2. Lols....You can imagine.


      #DontQuoteMe

      Delete
    3. Wait for your queen os start looking for mr c, since you are the one searching for them.

      Delete
  10. Go for Mr B. The older the better, its a life time commitment.

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  11. Poster I will advise you to follow your heart so that you will not come back to blame me for wrong choice.

    But bear in mind that not all that glitter is gold

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  12. Can we really make a choice for you? Oya bring their pictures and account balance, it will help me make the right judgement. Lol.

    Wish you good luck.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Marry the older one jor.

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  14. That's how you ladies will come here and be telling us about Mr ABCD and how to chose between Mr XYZ. I could imagine if you found out that the Misters also have someone close just like they have you, your chronicles will change to a "cheating boyfriend" no wonder they say ladies cheat easily mtchew...Why allow Mr B to play with your emotions when you know Mr A is your spec? now you are confused, abeg gerarahere.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. How did she cheat? Are you blind or didn't you read dat she hasn't given out the cookie to either of them? Or is there a law that says she can't have more than one male friend? How sure are you sef that these men do not have ladies they are gbenshing? Gerarahere too

      Delete
    2. Nne chop kiss 😘..no homo...exactly as i wud hv replied. .

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    3. Lol. So cheating is about sex but she is probably collecting stuffs from them. Grow up already.

      Delete
    4. Gbenshing is not the only way to cheat @vivilicious, not that I'm saying she was cheating

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    5. Vivi so cheating is all about giving cookie?
      I learn everyday from ladies here...🙌🙌🙌

      Delete
    6. When you commit to a relationship and still share emotional stuff with anoda person, youve already cheated.

      Commitment must remain unflinching.


      We are all guilty of this. May God help us all

      Delete
  15. Turn to God. It's very crucial now.
    He did it for you, so trust him to do it again and ask for the grace to agree with him cos it looks like you've made up your mind.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Yes, if God is your father, do you only go to your father when you have problems or challenges?
    Don't you greet him and hang out with him daily?
    Why is it only in marriage and "fruits of the womb" that girls remember there is a God?
    When you will be playing with your pussies and killing in your womb, you will not remember that he exists! Make una girls learn to relate with God always, he is not far away.
    How many of you read your bible and prayed today?
    Ok, how many of you were on social media today scouting for men?
    Ok still, how many of you uploaded pictures to instagram today to display market?

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  17. Nobody can choose for you except you so make the right choice,forget about the spec stuff and choose the one that will treat you right.

    Between where is the queen and boss?

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  18. @ Pinochiode you are tellIng her B as if you are in her heart, u think say na Phd be everything...

    ReplyDelete
  19. If there is "no man" na wahala,
    Man dump am, na wahala
    she get two, na wahala
    wetin babes want sef?

    ReplyDelete
  20. Hia, girls too get issues
    Very soon persin go write chronicle tell us that there is too much air to breathe

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  21. Dear poster, turn to the same God that heard your cry and sent you two men.
    He's faithful to give you the best always.


    And I'm here as single as a pulpit.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. God sent one man.
      I dunno who sent the other to create confusion and distraction.

      Delete
    2. Halaba you dey craze.. Lol

      Delete
  22. Follow your heart. And follow your head...

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  23. Mr. A might remind you one day that you are the one that sought his company. Please still wait since you are confused. When It comes to matters of the heart it is best not to make rushed decisions.

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  24. Since God gave you the both to choose from, why not ask him to tell you the one who is after his ♥?
    God speaks in different ways and since the cookie hasn't been given out, your head is still very much clear.
    Go to God again.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Why don't you go with Mr B, because Mr A might just start point out the age thing later, go with someone who is willing to make sacrifices for you.



    Long live SDK

    ReplyDelete
  26. "...so i turned to God". Poster, kindly turn to God again and let HIM choose for u. HIS choice might not be ur spec, HIS choice might even be some otha guy but whichever one it is, just know dat HIS choice will be d best for u. If/when storms come, u can always holding HIM by HIS words/promises concerning ur marriage.
    Go to HIM dear. HE speaks to us @ all times just dat our minds r too busy to hear/listen to HIM.

    ReplyDelete
  27. You love both of them?
    The same way?
    No


    Talk to Mr A about his "non conversation " nature if u want to go for him
    If it's Mr B try and introduce fun into his lifestyle.
    Don't force it either way,you can't have it all.

    Congrats in advance on your wedding.

    ReplyDelete
  28. Mr B it is..Communication in marriage is veeeery important. A marriage cannot survive without communication.

    ReplyDelete
  29. It looks like you are even the one pushing your relationship with Mr A.. the guy just dey use you dey 'catch trips'

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  30. If it was that simple, I'd say B. You wear the shoe and you know where it pinches. Follow your heart.

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  31. Still talk to God to help you and I believe He will.

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  32. You are a mature woman and at 30 i will assume that you will settle for the 34 years old who is MrB because he is mature and communicate with you on all level. It will be easy with him because he is also selfless so you will be his priority.

    ReplyDelete
  33. B ko, C ni....dont you have sense at all or do you think this is objective questions and answers segment. someone asked for advices and you are here choosing for her. if you dont know what to say then keep shut ma friend!

    ReplyDelete
  34. Isn't this cheating? You're dating a guy and having very long romantic phone calls with another to the point of discussing marriage with him! I believe the first guy is oblivious of this and probably putting in his all to see it work. The same women will come here and say "all men cheat". My wish is they both have sex with you and leave. I always laugh at guys that say "she's a good,responsible and homely girl". Ain't no woman like that. They're always looking out for a guy they feel is better.

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  35. I suggest you go for Mr B. This is someone who obviously loves you more than you love him- best recipe for a good marriage.
    Just curious though...why is a PhD holder ready to change States. Is he jobless? Strange that he has no ties to keep him front packing up and joining you. Most old sch mates are not who they claim to be. Investigate properly and when you are sure he is honest, go for him.
    All the best

    ReplyDelete
  36. iameveryoneandnoone22 March 2017 at 15:34

    Still waiting for a proper chronicle! Incest, father used kids for juju?? Some iriri aiye kinda chronicle! Come on! 170 million of y'all! See poster mouth like mr a & b! Mtttcchhewww.

    ReplyDelete
  37. I am one who loves communication, that's one of my top requirements. With communication, you can loosen be up to be a fun lover, since that's what you want as well. I'd rather a conversationalist than a fun lover, but that's me and you ain't me.

    ReplyDelete
  38. Go to a man of God that sees vision, come back and thank me.. Don't forget to pray personally and ask God to show you sign.

    ReplyDelete
  39. For me I would choose Mr B..communication is the key

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Confused women. So now communication is key? Not fat bank account, not big cassava?

      Delete
  40. Use ur head abeg, who is more mature and close to God.first

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  41. B.... Mr A will leave you at home with the children to continue with his hanging out and outgoing things. Go for the homely well balanced type.

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  42. Most times our spec ain't the right choice....B sounds more promising please do not compromise any one willing to make a sacrifice for u Is worth keeping
    *cheers

    ReplyDelete
  43. Please go back to God in prayers, if you think you might still get confused, talk to your pastor or mum and pray about it together. There's power in united prayers, I believe God will come through for you!

    ReplyDelete
  44. I won't marry a man that I can't communicate freely with. I have fun by making funny jokes and any man that I can't do that with is a No for me. So stick with who makes you happy by listening to your stupid jokes without making fun of you

    ReplyDelete
  45. The fact that B is a wordsmith won me over. I love intelligent and articulate people.

    But, why not ask God for his opinion? No one can ever really know the heart of man like the creator of that heart.
    You've gone to God before in desperation and heartbreak, why not in confusion?

    ReplyDelete
  46. I think deep down you know what you want!Think about it honestly...Don't be selfish with your thought.

    ReplyDelete
  47. You don't want anyone abeg. I would advise that you choose mr b. His maturity would keep your relationship. Mr A fun and all would fizzle out and you would most likely be left with a baby. Choose with your head not your heart!

    ReplyDelete
  48. I think from ur description both are cool but does Mr b who decide to move to where you are has a work to cater for you and the new family u want to start building bcos money is important in marriage bcos raising a family no be moi moi consider many things b4 picking one of them.

    ReplyDelete
  49. Hmmmm,ready to move cos of you?he no get work or business? And he is rich abi buoyant?and ready to relocate just like that?nne check am well ooo before they do you before you look the less you see.
    In essence,a man can confidently tell a woman to relocate knowing fully well that he can take care of the woman's needs in case if she didn't see job or business to do but for a guy,ermmm,relocation of business no be moi moi unless if he is working and transferred.anyways what do I know sef!

    ReplyDelete
  50. I'd be wary of the fun lover if i was you....

    ReplyDelete
  51. @poster...Marriage goes beyond fun...because crisis will come and it takes God, love and stability to pull through. In my opinion, Mr. A seem to have better prospects career wise, temperament and all. Would u rather a talkative man or a party goer?..since u seem a little more extroverted than he is, you can pull him into your space..and complement each other, than have two extroverts..that'll bring disaster.
    Trust me when u start having kids..real life will start and FUN alone will no longer suffice. Don't get me wrong not saying u should go for a cave man that'll bore u out, but a combo of heartfelt + well thought decisions is usually the BEST OPTION for taking important Life Steps like MARRIAGE.
    Besides women tend to be more mature upstairs than men even when they are of the same age not to talk of when he's younger..he's clearly still in the boyish fun mode and u are probably still in the same mode too..but motherhood will snap u out of it...while "snapping out of it" happens faster for women, rather unfortunately it takes men a little longer.
    My cousin had the same experience even though he was slightly older but in the Fun Mode..it took a couple of years for him to snap out of it...it's still not even 100%.
    #my2cents#Choose Practicality over Day Dreams
    May God Grant u understanding
    Amen

    *Silent Observer*

    ReplyDelete
  52. both guys are cool, just choose one.the one ur heart goes out to truly,u know dat one deep in ur heart. better still gbensh both of dem & choose d one wey sweet u pass,d one u connect fully with

    ReplyDelete
  53. Now nobody is talking about how men are cheats. Hypocrites, women cheat more when single and men cheat more when married. Cheating is cheating. If you loved Mr. A you wouldn't give in to Mr. B,hence go for Mr. B. Na only mean own una go dy see.

    ReplyDelete
  54. Poster thou art stingy; only u; two good men. U beta release one to me osiso....

    ReplyDelete
  55. Poster thou art stingy; only u; two good men. U beta release one to me osiso....

    ReplyDelete
  56. Sometimes,i ask my self as a guy..what do ladies really want?
    Okay...i got a good job..good business....everytgung okay...my girlfriend told me,what got her attracted to me was that..."i am the positive type" always positive in all i do...not the pessimistic type.....in essence,you know what you looking for in a guy...go for the guy that got what you looking for...

    ReplyDelete
  57. BLUNT...I give you beyonce hands up.... Forget these ladies. Girl go tell you say she's single before una start to relate; immediately after una link up, you go observe say she dey always press fone, smile sheepishly, receive calls at odd hours. When you confront her, she go say; "we are just friends".

    All hell will be let loose, if reverse is the case ooooooo

    I know d poster kind of persin....dem no dey ever dey serious....dem enjoy frolicking with guys anyhow under the guise of "my spec" when dem never find out if dem truly be the dude spec...(abi men no dey get spec too) kwakwakwakwakwakwakwakwakwa....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you jare. Most time i just áct as if i see nothing.
      Wetin be my own.

      Delete
  58. How about you look for the one that loves God most and pick that one. So simple
    Marriage is a three fold cord that consists of the husband, wife and God.

    ReplyDelete
  59. Younger lovers in this part of the world is a no no for me even if it's 5 mins younger , no respect.

    ReplyDelete
  60. Yes communication is key🔑. Stick with the one with the fear of God, someone that has a vision for the future, that respects and see the best in you. The one that gives you the most peace when you think of him. Goodluck 👍

    ReplyDelete
  61. Go for the older, more balanced, financially buoyant cos there's more to marriage than mere love ooo.

    ReplyDelete
  62. Stella has said it all, all the best.

    ReplyDelete
  63. B is relocating for u means he puts ur needs before his...100 yards husband material

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  64. Afi ' Mr B is a wordsmith'.. Hahahaha!!! Na the wordsmith e don take catch you for job na.. My dear, go for that one that makes you laugh ALL THE TIME cos there'll be times when life would throw you a hard punch, trust me, na that goofy side of him go help you with soft landing.. Have you asked yourself why a grown ass man would be willing to move to ur state of residence just like that if he TRULY had something tangible where he resides in the first place.. Sweetheart, shine ur eyes!!!! He just found himself an excellent meal ticket and he ain't gon' take chances.. I think you should hold out on both guys for a bit.. Men always assume that once a lady clocks 30 esp an established one, then all that's missing in her life is a man so that's what they offer to get ur 100% attention.. HOLD OUT!!!

    ReplyDelete
  65. Without communication, the relationship doesn't even exist. Follow your heart. Choose the one you know you would regret the most if you lost him.

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  66. Someone up there said she should go for Mr B cos he's mature. Please, maturity is not in age o. And nothing changes if she wants Mr A,not even his age will matter if they have that connection she wants.
    Dear poster,pray to God for guidance

    ReplyDelete
  67. Honestly I don't think you are confused. You know you prefer, you're just looking for validation.

    ReplyDelete
  68. Pray n u will find who is best for you

    ReplyDelete
  69. @Vivilous how shalllow can you be? So becos she is not yet gbensing either guys means she is not cheating abi? Fyi if u r in more than one relationship at a time, ure a CHEAT

    ReplyDelete
  70. Do you want to give both the cookie and see who stays? lol

    ReplyDelete
  71. Turn to God for direction.PRAY.

    ReplyDelete

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