Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative

WOW.....

STAND ALONE NARRATIVE:

A STORY TO LEARN FROM.....

Good day Stella and my fellow Bvs

I want to share an experience with you all, there might be something to learn or maybe not.

I met K over a year ago and he asked me out for over a year. Talking of how the day he met me he dreamt of me walking down the aisle to him. Whenever he comes around and sees me struggling with anything like fuel scarcity and its likes he jumps in and takes full charge. It felt nice but I had great reservations.

 My sister heard him beg me over FaceTime to come visit him in London ( from Nigeria ). I gave excuses that I was on my period and broke as I got back from London less than 2 months ago. ( He had offered to reimburse me for the ticket on that trip but I declined as I felt it might lead to unnecessary expectations from me). 

He countered my excuses and said if it was sex he wanted there were many girls in London he could get sex from and as for money he will pay for my ticket and give me some money to shop. I still wasn't moved at all. He had made this offer for Valentine and one of the Sallah breaks but I had turned him down and he will come up with emotional black mail of how I treat him like a leaper et all but somehow he wasn't getting to me.


My younger sister that over heard him this time called me to the room where another of my sister was and talked to me. Encouraged me to give him a try.

 How I didn't have much to loose, He had shown so much interest for over 1 year, Nice to me and goes out of his way to please me and my sisters, How it's better for a man to love you more than you love him, how with time I'll grow fond of him and it will turn to love bla bla bla and If I went to London and anything didn't go well I could easily go to my older sisters house or change my ticket and return to Nig.


I listened o! Just before I left, he sent messages everyday of how excited he was that I was coming and how he will cherish me and plenty washing. I went. 

Through out my trip this guy was extra nice to me. Going the extra mile to please me.... Hmmmmm, but my spirit kept telling me there was something not right about him. ( my sisters and friends kept telling me maybe I was the one that had closed my heart to love). I had caught him in petty lies a couple of times, He was very evasive, Won't talk much at allll, u force him to even get basic information from him and he keeps saying he was working on it that even his mom complained that he didn't like to share what was going on with him. 

Then we just didn't like the same things or places for leisure. He was constantly speaking his language on the phone which made me uncomfortable as I had no clue what he was about. Well, I had to start suppressing the thought that something was wrong and maybe because he was different from other guys I had been with but the feeling just won't go.


After my trip, (spent some time with him and some time with my sister) I came back to Nig still not sure of how I felt. But I just kept on going with him, Not even able to call him my boyfriend because I didn't know how i felt about him. We kept talking on FaceTime and began to get closer so I assumed there was hope things could get better.



He came back to Nigeria after about a month, we continued ( still I wasn't completely comfortable with him but I had loosened up over time. Letting go and letting God direct me. ) He talked about marriage, talking constantly about how many kids he wanted, about me relocating to London soon as he cant see himself living in Nig with the current economic situation, asked me to go renew my Shanghai visa so we can go to Paris together, talked about coming for a family function to get to know me to my home and what not.


Then he acted funny for about 3days I couldn't tell his whereabouts. He will say he is coming and won't come. Finally he came up with a cock and bull story. 

( Did I mention that he comes to my house as he wills unannounced and I can't do same to him as he lives in a gated estate not far from me) Uhhhhh, my raiders were up! I went to his house and everything seemed fine. He sleeps deep and I took a deep breath and tried to unlock his phone 

( he was fast asleep ). Hands shaking and I succeeded. Lo and behold, this quite "Yoruba demon" was a chronic womaniser! OmG!! Come and see WOMEN... Come and see chats. Come and see begging and toasting! OmG.... What?

 I was in shock. Chatting and toasting over 10 girls and sexual conversation with his baby mama that he gave the impression they were just cordial because of their daughter and talked of how she cheated on him while they were together hence he didn't marry her.

Well, the first chat caught my attention and I read their chat as far as I could... O, he was talking to her almost exactly as he talks to me. Promising never to hurt her, never to cheat on her. Promising with everything! Lord! I was gum-smacked... I took a deep breath thought hard and decided to send her a message. I told her he was chatting with many woman and I realised she was in London as well and I told her he had invited me to London last month and I was in his house ( told her his apartment and other detailed information just incase he tried to tell her I was lying. )

I know he might convince her I'm just a bitter ex trying to break them up and what not, but I'm sure after now her raiders will be up too. She must know with time as the women he is in relationship with are abnormally countless. Did I mention that last Valentine when I turned down his offer to come spend it with him in London, he sent a gift only to find another girls name on the card and he swore with everything that d lady made a mistake with addressing of the card that it was himself and his friend that had called to book for the gift and she got the names mixed up. I didn't care much then so I didn't even go into it. ( peharps it's the little pieces of events that kept my raiders up unconsciously).


I left him sleeping and took his spare phone to snoop more ( I must have done that out of anger as what I saw on his main phone was more than enough to last a life time ). I saw even more girlssss. He came early the next morning to ask for his phone ( he must have been scared I had chatted with more girls but I just couldn't be bothered to after that one) and after asking for the first time and I was like which fone, it was like I unleashed a demon, he wanted to slap me but luckily for me my sister held him and I flew to get his phone immediately. ( I see Wetin pass me as his eyes were red and he was shouting ). He finally left and the following day he apologised to my sisters for his outburst and tried to call me on FaceTime but I didn't pick.


Hmmmmm, I am very happy I snooped early enough as I would have gotten the shocker of my life over time, although I just didn't feel at peace with him but he was showing so much care and attention that I didn't have any logical reason to walk and he would have continued with his niceness and emotional blackmail. 

Happy also as I was thinking of letting other guys asking me out go so as to focus on him and give him a try considering everyone around me kept talking in his favour and I honestly can't keep more than one serious relationship. ( I just can't ).


Hmmmmm. That's my story.

Team snoopers.... Snooping opened my eyes this time. But I believe it was God that actually saved me from either a heartbreak or a life time with an abnormal chronic cheat. I call it abnormal because the number of women were tooooo much o!! I understand I just gave him a chance but if I had seen chats with 2 or 3 or even 5 girls, I would have called him a cheat but over 10? And most of them he is promising not to cheat and to cherish them? Now that's abnormal. I believe he needs help tho, but then again, I'm a woman what do I really know about men and their desire.


To the ladies and guys who are at peace in their relationships/marriages please don't make snooping a habit, it can make or mar your relationship so be sure you are ready for the outcome. Fact is our instincts are usually right, when we do not feel at peace in our hearts as regarding someone or something we must dig a little deeper, not only by snooping I must say, it could be by praying or asking questions from people likely to tell us the bitter truth or other ways I might not be thinking of now.


In all we do God will grant us wisdom.

On a lighter note, if that guy had beaten me, na from bone hospital I for de send this mail as he is huge like a giant. Lol.... I have too much love to give, I am not discouraged at all.

*Babe I am almost convinced to cross over to team snoop but i still insist that snooping is dangerous to health and to the relationship.

I dont like the way people handle cheating and the altercation that sometimes follows.

I have never seen a cheating woman walk away with non verbal confrontation and how the men handle it and lie and some react violently?OMG spare me!