STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
Newly Married And Starved
Stella please I need advice from you and my fellow BVs.
This is a situation that I have cried and cried about with no solution. DH and I have discussed our issue so many times and still very little improvement. Stella, I’ve been married for just a few months and our sex-life is pretty much non-existent. We are a young couple who dated for a few years before getting married. During the first year, it was so fun and crazy.
We used to get nasty, I mean reeaal nasty, did the dirtiest and most raunchy things during foreplay but we hardly had penetrative s3x. Just over a year later, we decided to stop all forms of intimacy as we re-dedicated our lives to Christ, promising to keep ourselves for marriage. 1 1/2 years later, we got married. It was a marriage we both anticipated, it was a glorious wedding and we were blessed with so many lovely gifts.
DH is my best friend and such a wonderful man.
But…
Our problem with sex began on the wedding night. It all felt rushed.. as if DH spent 5mins on foreplay just to get me ready enough to insert his kini. I obliged anyway and allowed him to have his way. Shortly after, we went on our honeymoon, to cut long story short, we only had s3x twice on honeymoon. Since then till now, I’ve not enjoyed s3x with my husband not for once!
He often makes a move and I try to oblige even when I’m not in the mood. During the act, he can sense that I’m not enjoying it because I go dry down there.. because of this, he goes soft too. The very few times that I do feel like having s3x, he won't even notice my advances because he is busy snacking on junk food and watching movies all night.
DH has expressed several times that he wants me to enjoy s3x but how do I tell him that he all of a sudden lacks basic techniques in bed. Everything is clumsy and sloppy. Even when he goes down, I hate the way he does it.. it was different when we first met, I used to enjoy intimacy with him.
But…
Our problem with sex began on the wedding night. It all felt rushed.. as if DH spent 5mins on foreplay just to get me ready enough to insert his kini. I obliged anyway and allowed him to have his way. Shortly after, we went on our honeymoon, to cut long story short, we only had s3x twice on honeymoon. Since then till now, I’ve not enjoyed s3x with my husband not for once!
He often makes a move and I try to oblige even when I’m not in the mood. During the act, he can sense that I’m not enjoying it because I go dry down there.. because of this, he goes soft too. The very few times that I do feel like having s3x, he won't even notice my advances because he is busy snacking on junk food and watching movies all night.
DH has expressed several times that he wants me to enjoy s3x but how do I tell him that he all of a sudden lacks basic techniques in bed. Everything is clumsy and sloppy. Even when he goes down, I hate the way he does it.. it was different when we first met, I used to enjoy intimacy with him.
As a boyfriend, DH knew exactly what to do to make me explode! (but I feel guilty thinking about those times as we are now both Christians who see the wrong in fornication) Could it be that DH is now using church-mind to have s3x with me? I hate s3x with him and this isn’t helping the process of TTC.
Our situation has led to depression, depression has led to me letting myself go, I’m gradually adding weight and no longer feel attractive. The way DH carries himself doesn’t motivate me to even take care of myself. It’s so bad now that we are both reluctant to initiate s3x because we both know how bad it will be.
Please help!
Our situation has led to depression, depression has led to me letting myself go, I’m gradually adding weight and no longer feel attractive. The way DH carries himself doesn’t motivate me to even take care of myself. It’s so bad now that we are both reluctant to initiate s3x because we both know how bad it will be.
Please help!
*GET A HOLD ON YOURSELF...S3X IS NOT FOOD!!!
you are adding wright and not taking care of yourself becos of a man?I DONT GET IT,I JUST DONT GET IT.
Why dont you try making yourself approachable and s3xy and see if it wont change things...
How about going to verbally or physically initiate things when you want to have it?Did the Bible say a man must make the first move?you are complaining about his moves in bed,are you a log of wood?If he is slacking can you not take charge to encourage and motivate him.
Gosh and you are TTCing?if you dont solve this problem before you become pregnant,it might be difficult to after then.
Go out and get ky jelly or ask around for where you can buy jelly to lubricate yourself.....get back what you lost before some side chick helps you.
Women your happiness lies with you,please leaning on a man for this,if he moves,you fall!
Abeg una see Donald Duke power bike?
ReplyDeleteAyade can now let us rest with his skygo machines.
Don is the man of carnival Calabar all year round!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Stella I support your comment. Hian! Girl go ride that dick till he speaks in tongue. You can't do it with a loose tohtoh. Take care of your self. Cook good food. If you are buoyant enough add sea foods like snails, periwinkle, a lot of fish to your meal.
DeleteControl your marriage!
Sex is marriage and marriage is sex! Good sex!.
See as the thing dey pepper me for body sef after una go dey curse side chicks.
Lemme go anon on this but if you wanna decode, I am BV BC.
This is serious. Poster you need to get your man to read this so you both will learn from the comments.
DeleteTell your husband to tell you the truth. During the period you both abstained from sex, he must have masturbated to the point it became a terrible habit and sadly its very difficult to stop.
DeletePoster Pele, but sex is not food.
DeleteIf you don't like the way he does it why not ride him yourself? For oral sex you could talk to him since he's your best friend tell him what to do where to touch and all that.
My main purpose of opening this post is to read the right of reply of yesterday's chronicle.
I quite disagree with Stella on this one as regards to Sex not being food. If sex no be some other kind of food, shey e go dey cause problems for marriage?? It is when you don't fulfil the motives of sex that's when you say it's not food. But when you have it in abundance, you won't say otherwise. Sex is very important in marriage hence why it was created.
DeleteSavage chronicle
DeleteAm provoked. Wat do u people mean. Madam stella n some bvees, dat sex isnt food. Ofc sex is food in marriage, u eat sex, drink sex, breath sex n dream sex wen u r married cos dat is 1 of d things dat spices up marriage n brings wat seems 2 b lost in marriage. U people should advise her 2 buckle up n rekindle her sex like. Pls mk una no provoke me ooooo. Na so she go just dey, side chick go help am mk her hubby dream, eat, sleep sex wit her. Guve reason adivse if u v none, shut up.
DeleteCakes and pastries. I concur. That is what happened. All this abstinence and church church. Who you help if you still dey master bate.
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
DeleteSometimes we claim the man is the problem but when we see the real part of it, it might be the woman maybe there is something you are not doing ryt, are you attractive?,have you added weight?, are you those type of women when they marry they loose control of their body(which I really hate if my wife those that I won't cheat! It I will give her strict instructions to start working out) ?, or does it mean that it is his problem, I believe strongly that when u apply the better technique your man will be asking for more try and work out, wear sexy dresses, cook good food, make ur words be of more romantic nature than ordinary talks try all this if this doesn't really work then u need to check your man what those he really loves(i prefer girls that wear sexy dresses that turns be on a lot) know what he really wants and discus this with him and know what he really loves if that doesn't work then check ur man those he really love ladies is he GAY(yes I know am really out of point but I know what am saying) check his life does he do it with someone else that he prefers more enjoyable Please try these one must work
DeleteCourtesy of SPIDEX
Kai!!!!
DeleteDD is the main MVP, batman bike????
Choi!!
Ayade had to use sirens as backup...lmao
@BluntChic clap for yourself oo! You've gone anon indeed
DeleteBabe, one night after gisting, give your hubby paper n tell him to write what he doesn't like about sex with you, and what he will like you to do during sex to make him enjoy it. You too do the same. When you guys are done, exchange the papers and read. It will help you guys to know where the problem is from. Good luck
Delete*sighs* you both be needing a sex therapist
DeleteMadam, God will help you and your DH, start reading romantic books and keep watching adult films
ReplyDelete*Larry was here*
@larry Lmfao!
Delete@Larry 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏
Delete@Larry 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏
DeletePG18
DeleteMadam poster for that period ur BF and you took break till he became yr DH He turned to fucking ashawo and he has gotten so use to it.ur the only one that can help him now. Just make sure you suck and fuck him like a bitch.
ASHAWO WAS 1's A VIRGIN
Hahahaha,I just read yesterday's chronicle after seeing a comment on today's IHN. I can boldly beat my chest that the poster was talking about Sam aka Frank egbe. We got chatting frm one of 2015 Snm n clicked but never saw till date. I'm not a single momma bt he was acting lovey-dovey. Thank God I walked away cos he lies so much and I couldn't cope. We ladies have to be smart. Some males here are devil sent n are here to fulfill their evil plans to Fuck you,you cum and then u're dumped.
ReplyDeleteNah,I didn't forget to go anon....
Dont mind the stupid cheap bitch! Opening legs for the cheapest things money can buy just because she heard that he lives "abroad" slut. Instead of you to channel all the love to your children, you want to go and die ontop another man's prick. No wonder your baby daddy abandoned you with the children. And yes, I won't be surprised if those children came from different fathers each. Tueh! I spit on her
DeleteAnonymous 16:27 fi suru.have you eaten today? So you mean nobody invited you to come and eat Christmas rice. Why would they, with a mouth as poisonous as yours. Kilode, all this pepper body on top chronicle. Aunty wa life is not that hard. Jeeeeez
DeleteAnon 18.28 don't mind the bitter minded anon16.27. Like she's the perfect woman.so because she's a single mother,she shouldn't fall in love again abi?i spit on you too anon 16.27 for her bitter soul and vile mindset.im not the poster but I hate when people are just mean for no reason.
DeleteAkpa akpu... keep an adding weight na. How is my business?
ReplyDeleteKikiki. Leave her. When a single babe starts handling ur husband, u'll be the first to cry blood.
DeleteWhen my own husband can't CUM even after 3 hrs of 'in out in out' I just tire.
DeleteNot even looking forward to sex these days
Ask him what he likes. In and out is overawed. 3 hours? Una get time oh. Start giving head and spitting on d dick.
DeleteAnon17:10 loose pussy can cause that,try pussy tightening exercises
DeleteHahahahahaha,I just read yesterday's chronicle after seeing a comment on today's IHN. I can boldly beat my chest that the poster was talking about Sam aka Frank egbe. We got chatting frm one of 2015 Snm n clicked but never saw till date. I'm not a single momma bt he was acting lovey-dovey. Thank God I walked away cos he lies so much and I couldn't cope. We ladies have to be smart. Some males here are devil sent n are here to fulfill their evil plans to Fuck you,you cum and then u're dumped.
ReplyDeleteNah,I didn't forget to go anon....
Stellz abeg sex is food. Very delicious and satisfactory food that fills the soul up. Abi u stella no like to fuck?
ReplyDeleteWhew! Me sef can't deal
ReplyDeletes** Talk dey tire me, I will pass On this
ReplyDeleteWhen they tell you people to chill on the sex while dating you won't hear.
ReplyDeleteWhat's there to enjoy when you have stolen all of it before marriage.
Stop thinking about the act and learn to enjoy it as it comes.
Now you're married and not doing anything wrong.
Stop stressing over it it's just sex.
Don't blame this issue for your weight gain, better watch it and it's for your own good. Adding weight is very easy but dropping it takes a lot of work.
Allow your man be and it's probably because you're always making sex seem like a task that's why he also isn't making any effort.
Stop counting the days you haven't had sex, focus on other things. Dress well and be fit. Let your husband know he has a woman and not a log of wood who just wants to bang and be banged.
I'm sure you no longer try to look good since you married, he doesn't see you as the woman he feel in love with anymore because you have let yourself go.
Work on your self woman and stop whining.
Imagine when the kids come and you're even too tired to have sex, what will you do then? Better keep calm.
It not just mere Sex see my hubby used to be so good when we were dating even before the kids came now all he wants to do is put his dick in and cum,reason I had to fuck my ex last month with his small dick that dude knows how to make a lady feel good
DeletePoster those late night snacking and watching movies, be carefully!!! He might be watching porn and masturbating, the will explain the lack of interest in making love to you.
ReplyDeleteThat's what my hubby does
DeleteU too dey contribute to the problem! U going dry makes him lose steam,kills his morale he sees sex with u as a chore, now u no longer look hot according to u, if he jams a hot babe that gets wet like snail liquid he would fuck his soul out.
ReplyDeleteHelp yourself.
Beyonce hands raised very high.
DeleteAbeg Stella what kind of stupid advice are you giving, just what do you mean by is sex food? Just because you lack intimacy in your marriage doesn't mean others should be like you, I just pity those that bring their issues to this blog because you lack tact, poster pls don't listen to any of the rubbish spewed out, hopefully someone with some common sense will better advice you.
ReplyDeleteLol! You remind me of my former asshole boss; always tears down other people's points but never has anything to offer! Imbe!
DeleteAn opinion doesn't have to ne 100% spot on. More often than not its the aggregate we need to help us arrive at a solution. You insulted a person but offered nothing. I say again, imbe!!!
Stella gave her opinion, why don't u give yours and move on, I hate the unnecessary insults, yet u can't stop visiting the blog, tufia gi.
Delete"Someone with some common sense will advice u" how come u no kukuma get common sense to advice her? but u are quick to trash Stella's advice... Funny somebori
DeleteYou don't have to be rude to drive your point home.
DeleteAfter all the nonsense you just typed what useful advice did you give the poster? Madam oversabi.
DeleteHoe! If ur man should experience sexual dysfunction later in life, ur type would cheat with reckless abandon, gtfo, hoe.
DeleteYour stupidity is on another level!
DeleteAnd you ended up not giving any advice. God save you from your bitterness.
DeleteAnon the thing tire me. How can you be telling married couple that sex is not food. So if a married woman is being ignored by her husband, she should keep quiet and endure it. You people advice single girls to practice team mermaid but turned around and encouraged that soon to be corp member to go and live with her boyfriend in Enugu for one year. I honestly pity people that bring their ish here because at the end of the day they end up more confused. Stella she needs her husband for sex, one person can't have sex. If she doesn't lean on her husband for sex, then who? Or are you encouraging her to stray?
DeleteCommon sense here kwa?In Fayose's words 'u can't give what u don't have'
DeleteA dohg dossn’t byte if yuo kip eat whale fade.
ReplyDeleteU too dey contribute to the problem! U going dry makes him lose steam,kills his morale he sees sex with u as a chore, now u no longer look hot according to u, if he jams a hot babe that gets wet like snail liquid he would fuck his soul out.
ReplyDeleteHelp yourself.
Hmmm.....
ReplyDeleteStella you're right though!
Stella did not state the book and verse she quoted from the "Bible".
ReplyDeleteHope Christians can see how Satan steals the joy of intercourse when they indulge in it before marriage.
If you think you are "gaining weight and unattractive", why not fast; even a fruit fast will help you and tell your husband that you will wish that you seek the Lord to grant you the intimacy you need in your relationship/marriage.
Woman,abeg no disturb me
ReplyDeleteIf u want sex that much,open your legs...I mean WIDE open without putting on Pant, then begin to blow breez inside your TOTO
@Galore
You are your own problem,how can you Base your happiness on SEX and a man.
DeleteI was always like you,putting hope n trust on people and things,until I was taught a tough lesson.
Work on yourself,smell nice,look good,and above all love yourself and watch magic happen in za other room.
Lol
DeleteBut why @ Galore-This is funny lolz 😂😂😂
DeleteSame problem I am having with DH though we both got married as virgins so no initial testing ( not like I regret it though)
ReplyDeleteI read books and posts on mind blowing sex and always imagine what it feels like but sadly I have never experienced it
Been married for 2 years now and sex is still very painful for me. Not like he is so big down there ( or is he? I don't even know) but penetraition always feels painful like it's the first time and note I have given birth to a baby viganialy so it's not about being too tight down there and there's a peppery feeling afterwards
It is killing me gradually as I always run away from him and he has noticed. I really wish we could do something about this but I do not know who to tell.
Stella, please post
Dr., tell a dr. I think you have some form of infection
DeleteMadam, u want to send ur husband to the hungry wolves outside abi? Continue. Better find out what turns u on, what ur husband like and what turns him on and act on it
DeleteMy dear go to the hospital n check yourself. Some Std makes sex painful n i think that might be your issue . Good luck
DeleteLubricate, lubricate (cold press coconut oil)
DeleteAlso do see a doctor concerning the peppery feeling. They will take it up from there.
That is because you not usually wet before he penetrates you..try to get him to spend more time on foreplay,especially sucking you down there and when it doesnt still work,then you know you are among the percentage of ladies that dont get wet even when they are very very horny,any good lubricant can save the day
DeleteTake antibiotics.... Or get tested... Have u ever had toilet infection? Or you might currently have yeast infection... Know of someone that had similar symptoms like yours due to hidden yeast infection, after treatment she began enjoying sex
DeleteThe peppery feeling is because of his bad hygiene. Does he clean his pimpim after urinatimg? Go for checkup cuz it is also a clear sign of STI.
DeleteBuy KY Jelly or let him use Vaseline on his privates. Also he should work on his foreplay moves. Like kissing you from head to toe. ThenThen concentrating on particular parts. Saying sweet words whilst in the act. Rubbing your ****** gently etc
DeleteAll you need is plenty of foreplay bfor penetration. I bet u arent always wet down there bfor he penetrates you. If no time for foreplay you can try using lubricant. It will make it less abrasive.
DeleteContinue running until he finds another.
DeleteIt's called fungi infection, get it treated n u will be fine
DeleteYou don't get wet enough before penetration .
DeleteThere are human beings called doctors and gynecologists.
DeleteThere is a place called a hospital.
Madam, you need to go for control. That peppering feeling is not good. Write to Amaka Van lare. She knows how.vest to advice you. Also spend more time in Foreplay.
DeleteAnon 17:44 you're damn funny.
DeleteSavage couple
DeleteI think you have an infection...go for a test asap
DeleteYour virgin husband don dash you something... go get it checked asap! ...I mean ur vagina.. get it checked!
DeleteSit your hubby down and find the root of your problem first!
ReplyDeleteYou are his wife already, so i don't get why he would feel guilty having sex with you now! I believe throughout those months of celibacy, something happened to you both that has deeply affected your sex life immensely!
Madam i hope you didn't test another cucumber before the wedding? Did he test another honey pot before then? Dig deep and find out what the cause of the problem is..
And while at it, start taking care of yourself again and stop getting fat! You just got too lazy to look after yourself well..stop blaming the poor man for that! If you don't work, try and find one to help keep your mind off sex all the time! During sex, relax your mind, tell him the things you'd like him to do to you, focus on him and him alone...you will enjoy it and the baby will come. You're stressing yourself so much over this issue it's not healthy
Good luck
What ehware will cause in this world, only God knows.
ReplyDeleteLord please fix their ish.
Or ask your husband to gift you SEX toys, the time someone gifted @Yemi Alade this Christmas 🎅 ,so you can help yourself with it
ReplyDelete@Galore
Shout up already!
DeleteWhy not gift her? Mtcheww
Yes o! Galore shout it out loud. In your attempt to sound relevant anon 16:40, you ended up losing your voice. Oya go and drink hot water and ginger. It soothes the throat
DeleteSex abi na u go still taya. You dey fat because of sex OK. It's like you guys don't work. Get busy pls
ReplyDeleteHmmmm, poster Google is your friend.
ReplyDeleteWhat will she google?
DeleteAda lol haha
DeleteIt is well...
ReplyDeleteThe time u spent writing this should have been spent telling DH.u shouldn't be scared of opening up to him
ReplyDeleteLots of problems can be easily resolved by commuication.
DeleteI dont get, some wives are scared of expressing thier needs to their husbands why???
Plus you are adding weight hmmmmmm, the lord is your muscle.
What aunty Stella said....take hold of your marriage woman,stop feeling guilty about indulging in crazy stuff or sex positions with ur husband...for God sake you are married and sex involves two people,if he is not satisfying you then satisfy him and even boast to him and challenge him,trust me he will buckle up bcos men love challenges in that department
ReplyDeleteDear Poster.
ReplyDeleteDon't allow sex to ruin your marriage. I suggest you talk it out with your husband, let him understand that he has been raping you all this while just follow Stella advice.
Sex is meant to be enjoy in marriage not to starve. When I was doing this similar thing to my bae, we talk it our=t and today we enjoy our self like Kilode. side eye for the single who doing the gbenshing outside marraige, God is watching you in 4D.
How many men listen after all the talk?
DeletePls ky gell is not good for ttc. It is not spermicide friendly. So try another prouct like preseed.
ReplyDeleteSome pple thinking abt sex while i'm thinking abt money.
ReplyDeleteMy dear, Money first.
DeleteStella has said it all, obey her wise words of advice and all shall be well with u and ur marriage.
ReplyDeleteThis lady is so confused...
ReplyDeleteThere is nothing wrong with a wife making herself attractive and asking her husband to have sex with her. I am married and that's the way we roll. There is no scriptures against this.
ReplyDeleteThe problem of this poster is that she had sold her sexual pleasure during courtship and did not repent of it.
The solution is that she should together with her husband repent in fasting and praying and ask the Lord to restore what they gave away.
She said she has
DeleteTaa, fasting and prayers ko. Give constructive advice pls.God will not come down from heaven to teach them how to gbensh properly
DeleteAbeg both of you should watch porn movies to bring the spark back.
ReplyDeleteSex is food oo. Don't mind that talk jare. You are too young to start 😢.
No vex Na deeper life or na Lord Chosen Mopol una be?
None of the said church, because they were doing it before they got married.
DeleteAdanne, who tell you say those churches no dey do before marriage? Speak for yourself ooo
DeleteU people are still sending chronicle in this time of celebration? Issoright.
ReplyDeleteAs for me every problem I put behind me from now till forever. *i wish*
Ndi deeper life or lord's chosen
ReplyDeleteAbeg no be deeper life o. Na chosen
DeleteJas dearie don't tell me you are deeper life? Interesting
DeleteLol@loveme jeje....dats not wat she needs now...be focus n help a confused woman biko.. @Jasmine u b deeper life?...how u take know say Na chosen...it's not only these churches dat says abstain from sex b4 marriage..The holy bible commands us too...Abeg ma una no turn this chronicles to church doctrine oooo..as a Christian we should all abstain from sex b4 marriage..my advice to the poster is to step up ur game..this is nt d time to allocate blame on ur DH...,be clean up n down there, dress in a seductive way, smell nyc,read books,watch romatic movies, visit Google, learn to communicate when making love(it helps a lot)..turn him on n make him want u always.
DeleteBiko just listen to aunty stellas advice and dont add weight,dat is d worst u can do to urself.
ReplyDeleteThis story is similar to mine in a way except that we have been married for three years now and things r now all good!
ReplyDeleteYou cannot compare dating to marriage , 'stealing meat' is different from having a big pot full of meat to yourself. During foreplay then too, I used to be very wet and hubby (then bf) used to wonder, we too never had penetrative sex and after a few months decided to stop as we were Christians too, so we preserved ourselves till marriage.
First year of marriage is a lot of ups and downs and psychologically, there's a lot of things u r trying to adjust to that u don't even know about.
Learn to nip problems in the bud! Don't make a big deal out of anything!
You are not wet? Get a lubricant (we used KY jelly for almost a year)! When hubby suddenly became a one minute man, we started using condoms and reviewed the sex positions to make him last longer in bed!
Talk sincerely to each other and don't be selfish! The other person can sense whether you care about them in the way you approach things!
When it seemed we both were not initiating sex, we talked about it!
You guys will be fine! Just communicate and look for solutions together not shifting blames or looking for who is at fault!
Hubby and I have been good (he lasts so long in bed now but always make sure to ask when I am ready for him to come) tho we have our hands full trying to adjust to the little one!
And can I say, try and hold off a little with the baby for now! Settle things and be on a good note in your marriage before bringing baby in. Hubby and I waited two years before we even started trying for a baby, a child is a lot of pressure on the marriage and if not well planned, can be a source of a broken home.
Gbam!!! Don't rush with bringing babies in yet. Wait small. One year, max 2
DeletePoster,sex in marriage is very very necessary,its a pity u guys hv lost d spark so quick bt my advice is that u hv a heart to heart talk with ur husband on d issue.also get intimate again b4 u talk of making babies bcos it's d intimacy in marriage that can produce babies,nd lastly when u guys re praying present it to God ur husband will know how important it is to u.
DeleteMadam poster
DeletePls listen to this writer and start working on ur weight ASAP.
Communication is key. Anon nailed it.
DeletePoster, chew on this.
DeleteWell said
DeletePoster, get a lubricant but NOT KY jelly because it reduces sperm motility and contains glycerin which damages sperms, this is not good if u are TTC. Look for lubricants like preseed, it is sperm friendly.
Delete😎👌
DeleteMadam poster please take this advice and apply it. I believe it will work for you. All the best
DeleteWell said dear
DeleteYall need to communicate. Speak to your husband instead of speaking to a bunch of strangers on a blog.
ReplyDeleteLol. So lack of sex make one add weight or you and your husband are busy eating junk food every night
ReplyDeleteCan't you talk to your husband about it
My dear, he's your husband now. You should feel free to tell him anything. The bible supports sex in married couples if not how do you multiply so feel free and do whatever you like with your mans body. Explore his body. Find those sensitive part and allow him to find yours. If he is watching TV and you feel like having him, please go to him and start playing with his body. He seems a sensitive person so make him relax. Like Stella said, find a lubricant that won't disturb each of you to use for easy penetration as some times we women don't easily get wet no matter the foreplay. He is yours now darling, enjoy him as much as you want. Do not be shy, do not play reserved, do not wait for him to make the first move. If you rrally want it, go grab it. Your happiness lies in your hand. Much love to you guys.
ReplyDeleteSex is one of thr greatest weapon in marriage,
ReplyDeleteit brings couples more closer and also drives away sadness.
Please madam! Get your freak on,
Go on a diet plan, when its 7pm no more food, just water.
If you cant gym, download yoga app or exercise app, lock your self in a room, put on music ,open the windows for cross ventilation and work out, or instead dance and do sit ups, within three weeks if you have a good gene, you would loss some weight.
Smell nice, get yourself some alluring OUD perfumes, they are strong and captivating thou expensive but it works,my grandma thought me that hehehe
... Also throw away all those old wrappers and ugly dresses, and get your self something skimpy when youre home with your man, also download nice home movies with erotic scenes and watch with your hubby!
And lastly dont be a nag!! Men hate it
What is with all this DH this and DH that? Please its very annoying! I didnt even bother reading to the end. DH a.k.a darling hubby and yet he isnt darling so what are you on about? Mtcheeeewwwww yes i'm pissed
ReplyDeleteHave some cold stone ice cream.
DeleteMadam work on your self before working on your hubby .talk things out with him in a polite way
ReplyDeletePray to God to heal your sex life and marriage bcos he is the authors of sex and marriage
Don't add weight oo ,it won't do you good at all
Goodluck
👍
DeleteYou are a woman, and you know the points in your body that get you wet, try and teach your husband all over again, pls don't endure quick-wham-bam-thank you in your marriage abeg.
ReplyDeleteYou have the right to be happy in your marriage, and having great toes curling orgasms is an important part. Hold his hand and points at where you want him to touch, some men suck breast like a hoover (gosh I hate that)
Finally, don't be shy to play with your hubby's pe'''s, you owns it, suck him, me ive never heard of a man that refuses his dick to be sucked, get a tomtom, it makes it more sweeter for him, and reduces gag reflexes on your part.
Also make sure you both are clean before sex. If you can't get wet get preseed lubricant just as bvs have said. Try to find out if something is not bothering him and pray for him. You need to be patient now.
DeleteU n ur hubby neeed therapy, If u are on Fb, kindly like this page» Sex and Sexuality with Funmi Akingbade and also add up Emmanuel Olufemi Akande. They are both renowned sextherapists and kud be of help. Stellar Dimoko ololufe Ogbeni Korkus kindly post this biko. The poster needs to sing a new song.
ReplyDeleteGbam!
DeleteThis one is not an issue now compared to what most married folks are going through..You are expecting so much from hubby thats why you are dissapointed.Maybe he's got so much on his
ReplyDeletemind and therefore not interested in sex.The food and late night movie could be a way of distracting himself.
Since you are really bothered find a remedy, I will suggest you initiate the sex and take charge.You musn't have it everyday but let it be mind blowing days you have it.That way, you both always look forward to the next one.
All the Best!!!
Do you know what turns your hubby on? If you don't find out. Press his buttons. Good luck!
DeleteThe way people talk about sex as if its food erhh, i can go for months without sex sef.If not for dh,i for no dey care sef.
ReplyDeleteMadam pls talk things out with your hubby and pray he changes
Do you orgasm?
Delete#There's no reset button in life. You can't take anything back, and you can't undo anything. All of your actions have consequences, and the things you say or do today will have a lasting impact on the rest of your life. You have to understand that, and you have to be aware of it while making your decisions*
ReplyDeleteIts a normal phase. You guys want to keep sex a mystery. That's the mistake. Stop hoping things will get better on its own. Talk about it; the fears, the hindrances, the preferences, the self doubt... Make it such a non-issue that both of you start laughing about it.
ReplyDeleteYour husband is probably in that phase where most men usually find themselves; afraid he is losing his ability to perform. Calm him down. Don't stress on his bad sex days cos just one bad comment about his performance will scare him off you for life.
Look good. Lose that weight and look so good that his dick goes into shock mode and starts yearning for you.
Your comment is very wise
Delete@Poster, You need to take things easy..Sex to me is overrated.
ReplyDeleteYou also need to find out the reason why your hubby has suddenly withdrawn, alot of factors are reponsible to even the junk food he takes and if possible you guys needs to take a vacation and rediscover yourselves,take all to God in prayer And yes You will be fine.
Blesssings on you.
Shut up! No be sex wey dem take born you? Everybody be forming agbero on social media while konji is killing you. Madam poster, GOOD sex is best form of communication & relaxation for couples, don't let these homewreckers deceive you
DeleteDo you orgasm?
DeleteGood advice
ReplyDeleteSDK you're so unbelievable sometimes, which one is hold yourself, sex isn't food...are you kidding me? Issorite, keep giving advices from the pit of hell.
ReplyDeleteMadam, beyond the perversions of the modern world such as anal, blow jobs etc...in fact putting & receiving "things" where they're not "naturally" meant to go, there's no reason why your Christian life should hinder you from enjoying sex optimally. God created, made it "mad" pleasurable & even sanctioned it. There's no place in the bible that God frowns at sex especially between married folks, so bolden & have a hearty chat with your husband & share your concerns. God is your muscle
Anonymous you must be a very big fool for that statement. Blow job is a pervasive? Which place in the bible did God frown at blowjobs? Which place anonymous? That is why all this Christian Christian women husbands leave them ohhh.
DeletePoster please suck the dick well. Command the dick. God cannot punish you for having sex with your husband Nonsense.
Aren't you a natural & everlasting fool? Ashewo kobo kobo! Since it wasn't condemned, where was it encouraged eh? Saint Too Know! That's how y'all bask in ignorance and sheer stupidity & drag other people into damnation because you want to belong. Is the penis or pussy meant for the mouth? I'm sure you never had sex education, you probably learnt from porn & peeping, idiot! Dick eater, keep on swallowing it, you'll choke on it some day
DeleteAnonymous 19:42 you sound like the only thing you can offer is sex? You'll be a VERY GOOD school girlfriend, so I can tear your pussy & asshole before dumping you
DeleteAnonymous 23.24 you are very stupid. So you know it was not encouraged why are you making laws for it? And who told you dick an pussy was not meant for the mouth ehn? You think God does not know we are going explore our own bodies while living together forever? That is why you are man and wife. If God wanted limitations on sex he for inspire the disciples to right am for bible just like sodomy. You are the one misleading yours3lf mumu. Poster if you like don't go and have good sex with your husband you hear. Be forming God said this and that. Meanwhile anonymous 23.47 I have many things to offer including SEX yes I said it. my husband does not lack. I cater to him well I cook ,clean I stand by him and support him. I will bear his children and after I born dis pikin I will continue to fuck him till they blow the trumpet. Instead of you to pray for good wife that will satisfy all your very needs you are thinking of those your dirty school runs girl that will give you HIV. Jealousy!!! Hypocrite man !! woooooo nothing for you!
DeleteIgnorance is bliss, I must tell you! The tenacity at which you display yours is a class by itself but not to worry, there's always a Judas in every 12 & you seem to enjoy the level of stupidity you're immersed in. I won't entertain your silliness by arguing where penises enter & what enters vaginas but I hope when you birth that child, you teach how to suck dick & I mean practically & if it's a boy, teach him to put his penis in people's mouths starting with yours since you're this deluded. God knows that we'll explore when he created us & therefore blowjobs & headgames are a given, ni? I'm sorry for your parents & the unlucky man who has brought your baggage & liability into his home
DeleteBad belle woooooo.
DeleteYes even if I don't go into the details myself I will make sure my child knows how to please her hubby and is confident enough in the bedroom to express her innermost thoughts and feelings. my son's should equally be very open with thier wives about thier needs and wants and not search for it elsewhere. I will teach them that sex is not taboo. It worked for my parents 30 yrs plus, it will continue to work for me and so shall it work for my children. They shall have a strong bond of love, and intimacy. Pls don't be sorry for us oh we are all very happy! Focus on your own bf/husband/wife. And as for your suggestion of incest you are just sick. So many self righteous Christians everywhere smh.
What is woooo? Are you also a market woman or you're just a street kid? Bad belle for you or your shadow? You must think you're really worth beyond the liability you are. Nobody knows everything but when you don't know that you don't know & you refuse to learn, that's where the problem is. I'm guessing you're the product of dick sucking mother & a pussy eating father & that's why your mindset is twisted but you & your family can keep on with the pervasion & keep on birthing generations of dick suckers & pussy eaters, fool!
DeletePoster nah wah u ooo if ur man doesn't notice u makein advances den u nt doin it well nah he's ur man dia is no churchish way 2 go abt sex jux give him a taste of ur old u and babe wen dat doesn't work tell him and y wld ur man b doin his tin and u loose interest u are createin problem 4 urself u better learn oooo cos he need 2 get into action try satisfy ur man first b4 layin complains. Sex is nt food bt it one of b most important 2 keep ur marriage from crashin
ReplyDeleteWhy do you think some men go out for mistress? Stealing is sweeeeet like that. But if you drive things yourself, hubby will feel anew everytime with you. Christianity supports satisfaction in bed with spouse, initiate the things that will satisfy you. If your hubby gives you a head and you want your boobs touched at the same time, reach his hand and place it where you want it.
ReplyDeleteAs for you going dry, work on your mind. You can also make a drink of Date, coconut and Tigernut. Blend the 3, you will want to first shred before blending to avoid spoiling your blender. Drink every evening preferably few hours to when you want to get down. It's a nutritious drink so no harm in drinking everyday.
All the best
MrsBee
Dear poster, its just as if I wrote this but am a guy and we have a child just under a year of being married but like your case our sex life is just there. Before we got married our romance was on point, I thought her everything she knew and made her a secondary virgin. We dated for 7 years plus. We did all the 'dos' but no penetration and it was always explosive,I got OK with BJ and HJ and neva thought of sex.now after marriage penetrative sex is boring I can't think dirty of her to arouse me sexually, I rush things and i can't go more than a round because I just concentrate on penetrating and cummin.my wife is complain ,my saving grace is that she uses the excuse of my big d...k as the reason for the pains she feels during sex and this makes her run away from sex. Personally I can't find that crazy feeling I use to feel then,like my mind is blocked from thinking dirty and sexy about my wife. Am trying to work on Myself and appreciate her body rather than concentrating on 'Cumming' during sex. Kissing use to be my ignition point but now complain of early morning breath is killing the urge, its crazy.So poster your hubby is psychologically blocking his mind from feeling the 'dirty' sexy thoughts and it can be disastrous. Talk to him, if he opens his mind to sort things out it may help,also you should not expect too much. Too all those saying sex is not food ,in marriage sex is food, everything has to be in place.sex and money are key ingredients of a successful marriage.
ReplyDeleteErrrm 18:08 you sure sey poster no be your wife? I dey suspect you ooo...
DeleteI need help y'all. I can't ride my husband and from all i have heard about the woman ontop style it's the bomb. It feels akward whenever i try and i always end up shamefacedly asking my husband to get on top. I Just dont get the right rhythm but when we are fully clothed and making out and i slide on him it feels awesome but once we get naked and i get on top! Hian, torri go come get k-leg. Pls i need detailed information on how to do it right. Help a sister and save a marriage bed.
ReplyDeletePart of the problem me thinks is that you don't feel beautiful naked bubble gum, hence you are shy of your body. Your type will not encourage lovemaking in naked light. You also are scared that your hubby won't appreciate your naked look. If you can find a way to turn off your feeling of self consciousness and insecurity and go with the flow, move with the feelings and see yourself as a sex goddess, I tell you, you will ride your cowboy. Confidence in bed is soooo important. A secret tip to men and women is to make your spouse feel sexy and loved by telling them how great they look naked or in clothes, also give them 'the look' (eye ball to eyeball) and don't hesitate to touch. My advice is for married couples ooo. Singles no let see finish syndrome finish una.
DeleteRide him reverse cowgirl, that way u don't get to see his face,lol, but he'll have a good view of ur bumbum, squat on d dick, ride d dick on ur knees, all on reverse mode n see him jerk up n grab u! Hehehehehehee
DeleteDo you feel shamed about your body? If yes prolly that's affecting your mindset. Go on boiled fish and vegetable diet for 3months strictly. You can have one cheat day a week. But in the meantime, I Would suggest you get sexy light lingerie that way, you covered up but not too covered up and safe.
DeleteThanks guys!
DeleteSometimes, discussing issues will naturally bring solutions. So poster discuss this issue with your partner and work on yourself, with God's grace all will work well for you
ReplyDeleteIf talking is not helping, pray with faith, then act, as in seduce him...
DeleteEwww.. Sex and Its Problems.. I thought Sex was to be enjoyed by Married Couples.. wah dah hell is going on?
ReplyDeleteMy sister!
DeleteReduce your carbohydrate intake eat more of vegetables, fruit and protein. Make yourself happy your libido will come back.have a lot of fire play with your husband. Wear sexy lingeries .you will be fine
ReplyDeleteAll of you are making comments. I'm experiencing the same issue too and I have tried to be sexy and done many things to arouse him to no avail. Having a child seems impossible. Pls don't blame her. I must say one thing that worked for me one day. I was drunk and behaved extremely wildly,he apparently liked it and became hard. Another day I snuck under the covers in the midnight and stroked him gently till he became hard then sat on top of him.u just have to keep inventing,but I know what you're going through. Stella pls don't judge u don't know how this feels
ReplyDeleteWomen talk too much and men don't listen....
ReplyDeleteTake the lead and he will follow... Enough talks.
Men men men....
ReplyDeleteHello Chronicle, nice reading your piece but i didn't see any problem in what you posted, what you need is to redirect your behavioural activities toward DH. You need to step up your game and stop your lackadaisical attitude, as far i am concern sex comes with mood and if your mood is not right, you can equally affect your DH and vice-versa.
ReplyDeletePlease note, man built the house and woman makes the home, your DH needs to see you in another form in terms of
- seductive dressing when around room
- Smartness
- Rekindle what he desires in you at your first date
- Your domestic chores, home cleaning and fine fragrance of the home
- Try to understand is mood, his job and challenges.
- above all keep loving him.
Thank you
Hello Chronicle, nice reading your piece but i didn't see any problem in what you posted, what you need is to redirect your behavioural activities toward DH. You need to step up your game and stop your lackadaisical attitude, as far i am concern sex comes with mood and if your mood is not right, you can equally affect your DH and vice-versa.
ReplyDeletePlease note, man built the house and woman makes the home, your DH needs to see you in another form in terms of
- seductive dressing when around room
- Smartness
- Rekindle what he desires in you at your first date
- Your domestic chores, home cleaning and fine fragrance of the home
- Try to understand is mood, his job and challenges.
- above all keep loving him.
Thank you
Hello Chronicle, nice reading your piece but i didn't see any problem in what you posted, what you need is to redirect your behavioural activities toward DH. You need to step up your game and stop your lackadaisical attitude, as far i am concern sex comes with mood and if your mood is not right, you can equally affect your DH and vice-versa.
ReplyDeletePlease note, man built the house and woman makes the home, your DH needs to see you in another form in terms of
- seductive dressing when around room
- Smartness
- Rekindle what he desires in you at your first date
- Your domestic chores, home cleaning and fine fragrance of the home
- Try to understand is mood, his job and challenges.
- above all keep loving him.
Thank you