Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative..

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Wednesday, December 14, 2016

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative..

Hmmmmm...






STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
WHEN AGE STANDS BETWEEN

Good day Madam Stella, I need your advice and that of the readers.

I am a 26-year-old woman in a long-distance relationship with a man I thought I would never date.

Its been 7 months now. He has been pursuing me since my first year in university when we met but I kept turning him down. However, I was already in another relationship then and we remained friends.


After the breakup with my ex-narcissist /sociopath fiance, I suffered depression for a year. This current man was always been there for me. He is caring, loving, very attentive, constant communication and has the good qualities of a would-be husband. He now wants us to get married but the last time I saw him was 5 years ago. It's not everything you believe on the phone. He keeps telling me he is the same person I met those 5 years ago and that we are destined to be.

These are my issues:


1. From day one, my reason for turning him down was our 14 years age difference and i never felt anything for him. He is now 40 never been married , no child. life has not been easy for him. I understand his need to settle down. But just thinking about it, if we have children before they reach college he would be retired by then.



2. He is only starting his career now as a newly admitted lawyer in Nigeria where he currently resides after studying abroad where we initially met. He is still job hunting. I'm already a fully established lawyer myself and have a good job. He has even partially agreed to relocate where I am just to be with me.


I thought I could overlook his age but it's disturbing me but at the same time I feel he is the kind of man I need. My past relationships were bad experiences. He seems different in a good way.


I know I must choose my battles but sometimes I feel like I dont want the relationship anymore and I know how much this man loves me.


Im so confused on what to do ..please advise. Apart of me says I'm pushing a good man away. I am meeting up with him in Nigeria this Christmas hopefully my perception will change.



*Age is nothing but a number my dear....
By -
Labels:

175 comments:

  1. LOLO IDEATO 14 December 2016 at 15:00

    Just negodu

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. SUGAR.14 December 2016 at 16:05

      The Older the better.

      #Justsaying.

      Delete
    2. Tessbaby14 December 2016 at 16:21

      Is he 14years oolder is wats bothering u? My dear its nothing 2 worry about but if im u i will look deeper. Anything im not 100% or 90% down with something must b wrong. This is someone uve been avoiding all ur life n today u inner self still finds an excuse not to b with him, ill say follow ur heart.

      Delete
    3. Candice 14 December 2016 at 17:46

      40, and broke? Me I can't even try it. If he had the money we can work on the age. At least RMD is sexy at 50. But this is you and I smell something fishy. If he is so good a man, no matter how broke, he would have been taken. Shine your eyes well. Wait till you meet him before you conclude

      Delete
    4. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 19:21

      Babygeh abeg if you don't need him please I need him. Send me his details please, God bless you as you do this.

      Delete
    5. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 20:23

      I don't think you are really feeling the guy. It is obvious you don't have peace about the relationship. Don't jump into anything you don't have peace about. Pray to God for guidance.

      Delete
    6. hadey halaba14 December 2016 at 21:52

      You don't need BV's advice as yur mind is already made up. U seem not to love him.

      If you do, u would have found peace with him and that is very important.

      Move on babe. God show u direction

      Amen

      Delete
    7. sdk's first lady15 December 2016 at 00:40

      The older the swreter

      Delete
    8. Emmanuel 15 December 2016 at 10:57

      Ideato/ilaje Blood - Na your advice be that

      Delete
    9. Anonymous15 December 2016 at 22:54

      Meaning you're 26? Why can't he find a woman closer to his age? He wants to suck your youth and potential out of you. Stay away from that broke man. And being with someone based on your past is never a good move.

      Delete
  2. STARRY LARRY14 December 2016 at 15:03

    As for me I can marry 45yr old man as far as he's single without any child, so nothing is wrong with your age differnces abeg




    *Larry was here*

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOLO IDEATO 14 December 2016 at 16:22

      Desperado alert!!!

      Delete
    2. Rare Gem14 December 2016 at 16:56

      If age is the only issue- marry him! Hopefully he his young at heart lol

      Delete
    3. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 19:29

      Ideato u wey follow young chewing boys with Sequire nko?after hanging around various joints on d Island and meet one of ds players wey chop u clean mouth u now hv d guts to open ur disgusting Buccal Cavity,de call person desperado? U very silly!

      Delete
    4. Anonymous15 December 2016 at 01:23

      Hubby is older than me with 13 YRS and he is the bestest

      Delete
    5. Unknown15 December 2016 at 12:52

      Age is just a number

      Delete
  3. Villager14 December 2016 at 15:03

    Ontil u meat him. Gud lock!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 16:05

      Ah villager oooo! Not only meat him, she can chicken him or just pepper soup the guy for ease of consumption.

      MrsBee

      Delete
    2. Unknown14 December 2016 at 16:23

      When u meat him' you will find out if he is red meat or white meat.. soft meat or hard meat.

      Delete
    3. aify14 December 2016 at 18:12

      I can't stop laughing abeg

      Delete
    4. Suwa14 December 2016 at 19:29

      Hahahhhehehehehuhuhuhuhu.
      Villager my darling!

      Delete
    5. excited courtesy14 December 2016 at 20:13

      Kikikikiki

      Delete
  4. ANGELRAY4SDK14 December 2016 at 15:04

    Women are funny, now that u have met a man who loves u, u are complaining of his age, if he was a millionaire would you have said no to his proposal, oya go and look for ur age mate dat will turn u into a punching bag.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 16:52

      Poster I'm 29, my DH is 46, I'm the happiest woman on Earth!!! He's amazing,i couldn't ask for any other man but him. Think about your happiness and peace of mind. Age is just a number!

      Delete
    2. Pinky16114 December 2016 at 16:57

      God bless u!

      Delete
  5. ES OH JAY14 December 2016 at 15:05

    My candid advise is that u should wait till u meet again later in the month and if he is still as u thought then u have nothing to fear.
    And by the way, age is nothing but a number and don't forget love conquers all

    ReplyDelete
  6. DON™14 December 2016 at 15:05

    Don't waste more of his time if you can't marry him. Wait for your mate that will treat you like a trash.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I am the queen and the boss of this blog(CHIEF)14 December 2016 at 15:05

    Well,I would have advised you to marry him if he is rich!...
    Atleast,when he retires or dies,you will have his resources and investments in raising your children...
    Run!!!!.,.
    Well,the choice is yours!...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. SONYES SIGNATURE . For ur cakes in pH and its environs ..call 0703554534214 December 2016 at 16:05

      If she come die before d man nko queen?

      Delete
    2. SDK mama14 December 2016 at 16:12

      Just before, as if death is by age

      Delete
    3. Jam Jam14 December 2016 at 18:15

      Queen it has been a while. I really like you and your comments. Hahaaaaa. I always scroll down to see what you wrote on such post!.

      Delete
  8. DOMINA14 December 2016 at 15:06

    Meet up with him first.

    Most of the things we worry about never come to pass. Don't put the Carr before the horse and give yourself sleepless nights.

    Meet up with him

    Then decide..

    Cheers

    ReplyDelete
  9. xxxTrinityxxx14 December 2016 at 15:06

    Madam age is nothing but a number.And the thing is older men always know how to take care of their women.I prefer that too.I don't know what the issue here is

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Love Struck14 December 2016 at 16:09

      Not all dear, some bring trouble more than the younger men

      Delete
    2. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 20:36

      Lovestruck you get sense die

      Delete
    3. Jasmine14 December 2016 at 21:45

      Some older men are worse oooo

      Delete
  10. Doppelgänger14 December 2016 at 15:06

    When I first saw your age difference, I thought you were older than him.
    I'm not even worried about his age but the fact that he is not financially stable. You don't even sound like you really like him. Yes he has all the qualities of a good man and a would be husband but do you like him? At 26, I think you're not giving yourself enough room to meet other men.
    Marrying well is very important dear and you should make it a priority in your quest to settle down. Don't just waltz into a marriage because one person seems like it.
    Wait to meet him like you said and know if what you feel for him is real. Spend time with him, hear him speak and find out if all the phone talk is real. You've known him for a long time doesn't make him the one.
    Money is very important and I'm repeating it again for a reason.
    You won't start a family on love and affection.
    You don't want to be burdened with it either. Your partner should have their own and be able to support the home as much as you can.
    Wait till you meet him please and don't rush anything.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Cookie14 December 2016 at 16:15

      I loooooooooooove you😘😘😘😘😘....Come back to my bbm😢😢😢😢

      Delete
    2. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 17:15

      The guy is forming good guy so he can use you to better his unsettled life. At 40 he is just starting his career as a lawyer in Nigeria for that matter. Only a broke Nigga without plans and a future will be so willing to relocate to join you. That guy is a leech. Flee from him asap.

      Delete
    3. Doppelgänger14 December 2016 at 17:28

      @Cookie, you were on my BBM? Wawu lol. Please mail me, click on my profile.

      Delete
    4. Candice 14 December 2016 at 17:36

      Doppel Chop kiss I beg. @anon 17:15, bomb dey ur head o. Loool

      Delete
    5. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 17:46

      Doppel u are good. Have u been married before? U sound like someone with so much wisdom and experience. I admire your person though

      Delete
    6. Doppelgänger14 December 2016 at 18:15

      @Candice 😚
      @anon 17:46, thank you but I'm still in my 20's and never been married. It's very easy to tell people what to do from the outside because you're not in their shoes.

      Delete
    7. Doppelgänger14 December 2016 at 18:16

      This comment has been removed by the author.

      Delete
    8. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 19:07

      I'm always amazed by your comments! Always Logical and straight to the point. If you live your life the way you type on here, then you are perfect.! Lol! You are the kind of friend that will give me brain when I decide to leave it in my ass! Wonderful Dopple!

      Delete
    9. hadey halaba14 December 2016 at 21:56

      OMG
      Doppel gat me all the time.

      Chop kiss jare

      Delete
    10. ARIANNA15 December 2016 at 08:01

      Come take some pregnancy hugs.
      Wise comment.

      Delete
  11. Blackberry14 December 2016 at 15:07

    Sure d guy got no issues? Over 40 , single? Job hunting? My sister, e get as e be.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tessbaby14 December 2016 at 16:24

      Ure right. Something is just not right n thats wat d tiny voice in her head is trying to tell her.

      Delete
  12. Rocky 14 December 2016 at 15:07

    Age might not be the only problem here for you. The guy is yet to settle down at the age of 40, for me that cancels out everything.

    Let's assume he finally gets settled down, Age might or might not be a problem for you.
    Personally, I don't think you should go ahead with the marriage.

    ReplyDelete
  13. LOLO IDEATO 14 December 2016 at 15:07

    My dear Age means a lot to me.I won't use clear eye to my Big Uncle's age mate. I even calculate my children's age n mine sef.

    He isn't even loaded for you to overlook age.

    Nne, how will your pre wedding photos look? How will you guys relate? Pillow fights and all. That's how this 43 year old never been married is still on my neck, but this one is rich ooooo.

    Asked me to make enquiries for a G wagon he wants to gift himself for new year. But babe he isn't my spec.

    He even visited y office yesterday, while he plied my route but the txt remains he is too old for me.

    I can only consider an older guy if he is a rich politician, an European and loaded...

    Abet who epistle epp.

    Open your eyes! Age is not Just Number ooooooo 14 years is not a joke!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Cookie14 December 2016 at 16:14

      Give your rich friend my number 😕😕😕 I don't mind

      😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

      Delete
    2. SDK mama14 December 2016 at 16:15

      Continue lying,

      Delete
    3. lovelani14 December 2016 at 16:47


      What a dumba$$

      Delete
    4. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 16:51

      Hehehe, ideato our bae, u no dey disappoint. I raise beyounce hand for you.

      Delete
    5. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 17:25

      Madan Ideato oniro u don start Abi? Who asked you to find out about G-wagon? Liar

      Delete
    6. Candice 14 December 2016 at 17:42

      Cookie abi o. Loool

      Delete
    7. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 19:04

      Lol! You drink too much. Give his contact to those that want it nau. Some cool stories. Lol!

      Delete
    8. LOLO IDEATO 14 December 2016 at 19:42

      Cookie are you ibo? Anambra or imo. I'll ask him if he's interested

      Delete
    9. Tasha14 December 2016 at 20:59

      Yay......ideato is back again...lol

      Delete
    10. hadey halaba14 December 2016 at 22:00

      In a bid to sound tush, u confuse yourself... In yur words, "That's how this 43 year old never been married is still on my neck, but this one is rich ooooo" and u still say
      "I can only consider an older guy if he is a rich politician, an European and loaded.."

      U r a fake person

      Delete
    11. PL THE GREAT14 December 2016 at 22:44

      A European.
      A European.
      A European.

      Continue reciting that till it sticks!

      Delete
    12. Anonymous15 December 2016 at 09:45

      Lmaooo PLTG u no get chill mehnn. Idiato wat d hell is an European? This geh you go school at all??? All you know is boys and staff bus. Shioorrr

      Delete
  14. Lady C14 December 2016 at 15:08

    U have been having bad experiences nd u want dis good guy to go. I really want u to make him stay nd d love will grow naturally.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Jasmine14 December 2016 at 21:47

      Love will grow in a broke marriage abi? Ok. Be deceiving her

      Delete
  15. Unknown14 December 2016 at 15:08

    Age is just a number yeah but you don't need to marry a man you're not proud of!

    Like they say on here...broke men can love for Africa! There's a possibility he's hanging onto you cos you're successful and independent. There's also a possibility he truly cares for you and wants to spend the rest of his life with you

    Either way, i think the decision lies with you. You don't sound like you love the guy, you sound like you're ashamed of him. So i say free him..don't settle for less! Your man is still out there waiting... good luck

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 16:53

      Kizzez

      Delete
    2. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 20:39

      Which broke men love?una never jam bad guys

      Delete
  16. Gidiprincess14 December 2016 at 15:10

    This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 16:52

      You self see say wetin u write to make sense...smh

      Delete
  17. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 15:10

    You no get problem, MMM A.K.A Moku Mogbe Modaran no chop your money.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Mrs. A.E, God's Own🌸🌺🌻14 December 2016 at 15:11

    The age difference is not that much, if he treats you right like a queen and cares for you and your needs, I do not see any reason not to be with him!

    But there's the part you said, it's been five years you last saw him, the only thing constant in life is change.
    People changes, it's inevitable, five years is a long time not to see someone, and his joining 100% is not assured after getting married. You don't wished to moved to where he is either.

    Why don't you find someone else or wait for some one else to locate you! You are already doubting him, and that's not a good thing..

    ReplyDelete
  19. brown14 December 2016 at 15:11

    Poster only u said his a good man, then go for it,as my stella said age is just but a number

    ReplyDelete
  20. Unknown14 December 2016 at 15:12

    Age is just a number my dear

    ReplyDelete
  21. Cynthia Iyede14 December 2016 at 15:12

    Follow your heart babe. It is well.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 15:14

    Wait for him to get a job first. But in the mean time, spread your tentacles. If you marry without loving the guy, you will send chronicle

    ReplyDelete
  23. Martins (GlossyMart Tech Gadgets 07037317400 or 08116202737)14 December 2016 at 15:14

    @poster;the issue here is just A matter of "Choice" and "Decision"..

    The thing is;Some ladies like them older,whilst some prefer them younger..

    If you cant see yourself tying the knot with A man of his age;then tell him straight and stand on what suits you..
    Asking us to decide for you wont yield anything since you are the one "To wear" the shoe and probably "keep putting on" same shoe...

    Like i said above;you alone know what you need and thus you ve got the choice to make..

    #Goodluck

    @MARTINS ABOY

    ReplyDelete
  24. Yori Yori Princess14 December 2016 at 15:15

    hahahaha Poster if we have children when they reach secondary school he would have retired. Chai na wa for you.

    Go and look for your agemate now. I am very sure you are afraid of what the future will hold for the two of you. 1st he is still looking for a job. You want a self made man.

    Wait for the self made man to locate you

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Unknown14 December 2016 at 18:11

      Love me jeje, is she not self-made? People need to get rid of the stupid mentality that a lady has to struggle with her bf before he can wife her. Her demands are very realistic, some one who can provide for her not a liability. Men are providers, women are helpmates. Not the other way round.
      It's a pity the Nigerian economy and life has tossed it upside down.😢

      Delete
    2. PL THE GREAT14 December 2016 at 22:45

      @ gicoco lovely response.

      👊👊👊

      Delete
  25. Nini14 December 2016 at 15:15

    I like matured guys but no be 40yrs,,age might just be a number but I'll advice you don't rush into it. Five years is a hell of a long time for someone to change,if people change over night talk more or 5yrs. You can date him all over again(courtship) and yes if he has bad behavior he might hide it cos he's desperate to settle down. Pray about it.

    ReplyDelete
  26. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 15:15

    Stella, that saying dsnt always fit tight into every situation, but that being said 14yrs gap isn't so terrible to make ones jaw drop to the floor, maybe hard times & frustration has successfully added 20yrs to his look, makin him look 60..... Good thing ure comin down to xmas to see things for urself, keep an open mind, xcept you've got a better offer u didn't mention.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 16:46

      Leave Stella make she dey yarn dust

      Delete
  27. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 15:17

    Don't marry him because he is good man. If you don't like him, leave him. But first let him visit. If you don't feel anything after seeing face to face again then leave it

    ReplyDelete
  28. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 15:17

    I'll go with Stella on this one. Think about it though, what have the younger men done for you anyway?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 16:45

      Dumbass you don't your an opinion right. .. smh

      Delete
    2. Anonymous15 December 2016 at 05:35

      Smart mouth @ anony 16:45 crosscheck your grammar next time you are replying comments. Also, my agreeing with Stella means my opinion is similar to hers. So yes, it is my opinion. Oya, go and take a nap since you are have decided to show your childish traits today. GOD BLESS YOU!

      Delete
  29. General Zod14 December 2016 at 15:17

    ..and poverty is nothing but just a word.
    Stella it's not easy for male lawyers at all. He wants to practice in Nigeria? It will take him at least 3 years to stabilize.

    Poster do what you really want to do. It's obvious that you may not cope in the long run.

    ReplyDelete
  30. Sandy14 December 2016 at 15:18

    Dear Poster, I think the age difference is your main probs here. It dosent count or matter like at all. My dad gave my mum 12 years and my sisters hubby gave her 14 years. They are all still together and rocking..It's not a new thing at all so don't miss this man with the good qualities you mentioned above. Good luck!

    ReplyDelete
  31. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 15:19

    oh children are truly a gift frm God..... their was a fire accident in my street today.... a house beside ours... so I rushed to Carry my 3yrs nephew out... imagine while running carrying him all he was shouting was Jesus Jesus Jesus wit dis tiny voice ...oh it really melt my hrt...now I wonder... how does a 3 yrs old knws Dt Gods name saves...sad we lost a tenant...he was drunk and was sleeping wen De fire started

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 16:16

      Oh, how impressive is that 3year old shouting Jesus. God bless his parents for such upbringing. Give him Sdk blog love for me.

      MrsBee

      Delete
  32. Rhapsody 14 December 2016 at 15:20

    40 26.

    Make I read comments.

    ReplyDelete
  33. ITz_Gee14 December 2016 at 15:20

    WELL SPOKEN STELLZ GOOD AFTERNOON HUNNIE BUNCH @POSTER AGE AS AUNTY STELLZ SAID IS NOTHING BUT A NUMBER IT IS NOT A DETERMINING FACTOR. DO U LOVE HIM ENOUGH TO SPEND TILL ETERNITY WITH HIM? THATS THE FIRST THING, IF U ARE WORRIED HE WOULD BE OLD AND RETIRED BY THE TIME U PEOPLE HAVE KIDS, CONSIDERING HE IS READY TO RELOCATE FOR U AND ALL THEN THATS THE DEDICATION YOU NEED TO GUIDE HIM THROUGH A CAREER PART THAT WOULD BE BENEFICIAL TO BOTH OF YOU IN THE LONG RUN I FEEL HE IS A GOOD MAN WHEN YOU TRUELY ANSWER THE FIRST QUESTION I HAVE ASKED TRUST ME THAT ANSWER FILLS ALL THE MISSING VOIDS. @STELLZ MY LOVE AM ALWAYS WAITING FOR THE MEETING POINTS TODAY OWN NO SWEET ME RA RA AND I DELAYED MY LUNCH SO I COULD READ IT. PLUS SADLY I MISSED OUT ON THE SINGLES AND MINGLE AM STILL CRYING. WELL LET ME GO AND EAT LOVE YOU PLENTY STELLZ GOD BLESS U DEARIE

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Cookie14 December 2016 at 16:19

      Is that why you are shouting??? Hian!!

      Use punctuation next time Biko, no blind person

      Delete
    2. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 16:45

      Damn stop screaming.

      Delete
    3. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 20:06

      Hahahahah...

      Delete
    4. Unknown14 December 2016 at 20:19

      Yay...i finally have a blog id.

      Delete
  34. crystal14 December 2016 at 15:22

    Why don't you wait till you see him to take a decision. You are talking from what you know 5years ago. Learn who he is now after you must have met and based your decision on what you would have known. Age might be just a number, but for some it is not. Whatever you do, don't be desperate.

    ReplyDelete
  35. Jasmine14 December 2016 at 15:23

    Age is nothing but a number but my dear...



    Speechless

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Jasmine14 December 2016 at 22:00

      U can forget about the age o, but a man that is not financially stable at 40? Ha!

      My sister, be careful. He's even ready to relocate to where you are? He is a fucking leech.



      Leave that lazy old fool abeg.

      Delete
  36. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 15:24

    So my best friend did not come for both my traditional and white wedding,and weeks after, she has not called to say congrats or say why she didn't come. Am I wrong to be angry?
    NB: she s married and I was her chief bridesmaid.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 16:24

      Learn to let people go when they choose to go!!
      Also, learn to not be upset with people when you don't hear from them, you never know what battle is in their life.
      The success of your marriage isn't dependent of a bff's presence or absence, grow up!!
      If she eventually calls or shows up, understand her excuse if she gives one otherwise just live.
      You can call her to find out if she's fine too, real friends don't wait for who calls first and I'd choose to be kind over being right. Congrats on your big day.

      MrsBee

      Delete
    2. BELLA'S @cakes_by_bellas 14 December 2016 at 16:32

      Them plenty oo... she might call months later and be giving stupid stories . Bad belle people everywhere and they will be the ones claiming holier than thou . Just know how to put her in her place be careful around her

      Delete
    3. GALORE14 December 2016 at 16:38

      May be she is affected by MMM😃


      @Galore

      Delete
    4. Unknown14 December 2016 at 16:44

      She might be going through tough time...don't judge her yet.

      Delete
    5. Unknown14 December 2016 at 20:21

      Don't judge her please.People are going through alot nd sometimes they need space to breathe..

      Delete
  37. ProudlyDeltan1514 December 2016 at 15:24

    When I saw the header "When Age Stands Between" I assumed U were older than the guy until I read the full story....People's time to be blessed are different. You can see his potentials and know if his hustle is paying/will pay soon....5 years ago he was chasing you what was he doing then still in school? There is a saying that it is better to cry in a Lamborghini than in a Volkswagen....love without money kills love. You have not said anything about loving him just him loving you.

    He plans to relocate to be with you...to do what?...Does he have a job waiting or he wants to be with you while you foot all the bills till he gets a job?

    My friend look at the pros and cons and don't let pity blind you...ProudlyDeltan

    ReplyDelete
  38. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 15:25

    Stella why do you like to insult men anyhow? I don't like the way you talked to the guy that sent his Chronicle yesterday on ur IHN today. Anyways! I don't blame you... I blame some foolish senseless guys are still sending their problems to you for advice.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 16:43

      Gbam!!!

      Delete
    2. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 20:37

      Leave Stella with her opinion. The truth is bitter.

      Delete
  39. Unknown14 December 2016 at 15:25

    First take it to God in prayers.

    ReplyDelete
  40. Mrs shantelle14 December 2016 at 15:25

    Like Stella said age is nothing but a number. When I married my husband he was way older, my wanted to object because of age self but in the end it was one of the best decisions I ever made. Luckily
    My husband is one the small side so his age doesn't even tell on him. I married him because he loves and adores me to bits. So if that man loves you my dear go ahead. There will be ups and downs But trust me U will enjoy your marriage...... Talking from experience.... WISH YOU LUCK

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Jasmine14 December 2016 at 21:52

      Talking from experience abi? But ur husband wasn't jobless or was he? U moved to meet him not him coming to meet u abi?


      Pls read the story again and advise her ma. Thank u

      Delete
    2. Anonymous15 December 2016 at 03:08

      Fat fool Jasmine... I am sure your parents are poor. It's people like you that carry money for head.

      Delete
  41. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 15:25

    You didn't mention anything about if YOU love him. Don't settle.

    ReplyDelete
  42. Chike TEFLON (Award winning blog visitor)14 December 2016 at 15:26

    Poster you don't love him simple.
    Follow your heart.

    ReplyDelete
  43. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 15:28

    U should forget his age and focus on d fact that he loves you, u should also pray. I don't think his age should be your problem, ure not getting any younger yourself

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Jasmine14 December 2016 at 21:53

      She is not getting any younger so she should marry a jobless man? Tufia

      Delete
  44. Chike TEFLON (Award winning blog visitor)14 December 2016 at 15:28

    Marriage is a life time journey, if you make a mistake it will be a life time mistake.
    Ask yourself what exactly you want from the man

    ReplyDelete
  45. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 15:29

    I like how you said you are ready to pick your battles, poster after a while someone has to compromise. It's not ideal but what can one do? Age is just a number but it has serious implications, you can do somethings to help yourself. Firstly if u marry him, bear in mind that you might end up being a single mother so you have to be financially independent. Also ensure you don't have more than two kids but really God's ways are not our ways. My mom married someone that was 20 years older than her, my dad used to say when he dies my mum will still have about 30 yrs to live but surprise surprise my mum died 15 yrs ago and my dad is still alive and well. You might marry someone just a few years older or even your age mate and he dies young my point is there are no guarantees in life and even the best laid plans do fail. It's your life and you have to do what you feel is best in the end.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 16:22

      Hmmmm....

      Delete
    2. DON™14 December 2016 at 19:12

      I hope you read this.

      Delete
    3. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 19:59

      Poster, I was in a similar situation last year. I was just 25, no sensible suitors and realised sometimes a woman has to compromise. Started dating a man that was 40, he has a good job and never been married. I didn't like his looks or the age gap but I was ready to accept him since I didn't have better offers. I had similar concerns like how a 40 yr old willjust get married and start having children. The deal breaker for me was the fact that the guy was a virgin at 40! BTW, I was also a 25 yr old virgin but at least I'm a lady. I started to worry that he was impotent and so broke up with him since there was no way I could test before marriage and didn't want to enter one chance.

      Delete
    4. Unknown14 December 2016 at 20:25

      Hahahaah

      Delete
    5. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 20:41

      Hmmmmm, na wa ooo

      Delete
    6. Jasmine14 December 2016 at 21:54

      Dude is jobless!!! Ha!

      Delete
  46. West14 December 2016 at 15:30

    U should forget his age and focus on d fact that he loves you, u should also pray. I don't think his age should be your problem, ure not getting any younger yourself

    ReplyDelete
  47. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 15:31

    Drop his number

    ReplyDelete
  48. Ice Queen14 December 2016 at 15:32

    When you meet him,of course your perception will to negative

    ReplyDelete
  49. Unknown14 December 2016 at 15:33

    Why don't you put this to God in prayers and let him reveal His will concerning this man. Meet him up when he comes for Christmas. I feel you are worrying yourself unnecessarily.

    ReplyDelete
  50. Adanne14 December 2016 at 15:33

    Lol@pursuing you, where was he pursuing you to? Hehehehe

    Meanwhile, just meet up with him as you have planned, you never know your perception might change for good.

    On the other hand, I use to be like you when it comes to age, I did the same math you did (before your kids will get to college, he must have retired), and then you are left with the responsibility. Well, in my case , I didn't go for the man o jareh. I cannot come and shout for this obodo ndi ozo.

    Think smart, consider every options, you are not that old. Goodluck

    ReplyDelete
  51. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 15:33

    My dear it's about prospects not just the present. My fiance is a third year law student while I'm working already though with a private company. Before now he was a successful business man before things took a twist and yet he still stood up for himself to put his life together. He's older than me by 18 years and I'm not bothered because I'm interested in the content. Yet you are complaining about someone who has been called to bar while you are earning money in foreign currency. It's up to you to choose but I'd advise that you look beyond his earnings and consider the type of family you both will establish

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Jasmine14 December 2016 at 21:55

      So she should choose to be a bread winner like u already av? Lol

      Delete
    2. Chibuzo Lilian15 December 2016 at 15:51

      I'm not complaining my dear. A lot of women train their husbands. In fact I pride in what I'm doing.Have no regrets

      Delete
  52. Chike TEFLON (Award winning blog visitor)14 December 2016 at 15:34

    If he is not buoyant enough you support him. Shebi you said you are established.

    ReplyDelete
  53. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 15:36

    Age is nothing but a number. Give this man a chance...

    ReplyDelete
  54. Lucile coconut oil,carrot oil and black soap Abuja 0705960532014 December 2016 at 15:37

    Marry him

    ReplyDelete
  55. 300k white berry14 December 2016 at 15:41

    Stella this lady is on her way to becoming aunty gwegs. Keep choosing and placing age difference as part of ur nassicist psychopathic standard. U are talking about children being in college and retirement!!! Jerez u women just judge a man for today forgetting that tomorrow that same man can hammer all the dumb ass money u have worked for in 35years. mummy u don't need any advise abeg. Continue to wash ur mother's clothes in her house.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Unknown14 December 2016 at 20:29

      Pls she is not an aunty gwegs..pls feel free to marry for uncle's agemate who can not even take care of you..Poster pls follow your heart and bear the consequences alone

      Delete
  56. Becky naka (Beautiful home concept....your sure plug for industrial cleaning)14 December 2016 at 15:42

    If u love him, go ahead.

    ReplyDelete
  57. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 15:44

    @ SDK...you say wetin? You for wait for your husband to clock 70 before you marry am nah? Why didn't you take your own advice? Madam...unless you have a history of ancestral spirits, leave that man ALONE!!! Like you sensibly said, you don't want to raise kids and pay college tuition with pension. Look for your age bracket

    ReplyDelete
  58. Minrex14 December 2016 at 15:48

    Age is nothing but a number dear its the maturity that matters.
    Personally i love my men older.

    ReplyDelete
  59. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 15:51

    Chai,mature minds please advice here well. Let me read comments

    ReplyDelete
  60. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 15:58

    My dear poster, I feel you should follow your heart and let that man be your Knight in Shining Armor. you Dont have to worry about his age all u should pray for is that your marriage should last. If you are submissive enough then you can support financially till he is fully on his feet. Dont worry about your children's education God will take care of it. But seek the Face of God before you do anything. God bless you.


    #olori

    ReplyDelete
  61. GALORE14 December 2016 at 15:59

    Age is a number..but the Same BV go deyy abuse @Dabota and others who married older men



    God punish devil





    @Galore

    ReplyDelete
  62. miss Fee14 December 2016 at 16:01

    I as a woman have always had a thing for marrying a man much older than I am. Not a married man, widower or divorcee,just someone older. But I guess we're all different.
    You should decide this yourself. If everything else works, age isn't a problem to me. Make your decision based on how you feel, not when his career started,some people blossom in the late stages of their lives.

    ReplyDelete
  63. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 16:02

    Hopefully your perspective of him changes after the meeting. Age is nothing if he is not the type that acts like daddy.
    If all things work out well, give birth sharply with little age gap so that he will actively be in their lives. Of what good is an irresponsible young father, God forbid.
    He needs a stable job if he wants to start a family soon, you both can consider business by the side as well to boost your comfort.
    Please what age is retirement age in Nigeria?

    MrsBee

    ReplyDelete
  64. OfficialChasis14 December 2016 at 16:09

    My dear just accept him that way & stop looking at his age. Try & organise several dates with him to know him better face to face. At least that will help in making your final decision

    ReplyDelete
  65. Ch1da14 December 2016 at 16:29

    Madam, you are still young. By the time you hit 30. You will be asking us , who can plan a small stylish wedding.

    ReplyDelete
  66. Unknown14 December 2016 at 16:31

    Oh dear,you should meet 1st cos pple canpretend to be all perfectover the phone...for d age ish its at ur advantage cos he's more experience and might overlook what a younger guy won't overlook..

    ReplyDelete
  67. Mamannukusdkblogceleb ��14 December 2016 at 16:33

    Follow your heart biko
    If your heart isn't in this, don't do it

    ReplyDelete
  68. Unknown14 December 2016 at 16:39

    Oh dear, you should meet 1st cos pple can pretend to be all perfect over the phone...with the age ish its really nothing to be worried about..its jus a number..he just might be experience to overlook what a younger guy cant..

    ReplyDelete
  69. Lady T/ am worth more than a thousand dollars14 December 2016 at 16:47

    Joke Silva's hubby is 19 years older than her and I think they have a good marriage.
    Challenges will come no doubt but I mean you guys can weather it. Besides God can give him a lift in one day to last you a life time.
    The most important thing is pray.

    ReplyDelete
  70. BEDS AND ROSES14 December 2016 at 17:03

    My dear not financially stable at 40? just getting career started at 40 and never been married ? pls watch this man carefully.
    At 26 pls don't be desperate to marry this man at d drop of a hat you still have time.
    I don't have a problem with his age, but I have a problem with a man that isn't financially stable still job hunting wanting to get married. Even if he's 30 I wld say be careful.
    Jobs are so hard to get right now. Let him get a job first, save sum money, them u can even consider him. Don't be the bread winner at ur young age.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Unknown14 December 2016 at 18:41

      Seconded

      Delete
    2. Jasmine14 December 2016 at 21:57

      Gbam!!! Don't be a bread winner at this young age o coz u will do it till u die. Hmmm, i've warned u sha

      Delete
  71. Nonye Inspired (James Bond's Girl)14 December 2016 at 17:16

    my dear Please go with Martins Aboy's advice..Yes Age is nothing but a number..But you have got to weigh your options..he may be a good man but is he good enuff for you to marry..See him first, spend some time with him and also pray very well, try to get him upset to see his reaction.. My dear people change , the man u saw in your 100 level is gonna be different from the man now..Now is the time to apply wisdom, caution and patience..Dont be compelled by anyone to marry when you don't want to.

    ReplyDelete
  72. Unknown14 December 2016 at 17:19

    Poster, Age is nothing but a number but I think your main concern is that he is not financially stable. Y is he relocating to b with you or for you to pay his bills. It is better to cry in a rangy than a peogeout 504.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Unknown14 December 2016 at 20:36

      Thanks Chinny baby..Poster abeg receive sense

      Delete
  73. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 17:21

    My dad gave me an Advice when I first met my broke and loving ex. He said "you never know a man until he is standing on his own two feet". True to form as soon as this idiot stood on his own two feet after I spent all my money on him and sent him abroad and paid for his wedding to his american wife. Lo and behold. guy standing on his own two feet....guy starts to say.....my family say..... this same family wen no wan know you wen you were begging o for money for visa and money for food...all of a sudden.. family say.... my dear... your man might be different but from my own experience... a broke nigga will love and worship your arse like you are his God....so use your judgement and pray he doesn't change. Gamble and wait till he becomes someone then you can see his true colour but right now he depends on you so he needs to be the nicest man you know....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 18:36

      How many times will y'all ladies be told...NEVER KEEP A MAN?!? If he can't take care of himself, talk more of you, he's got no business looking for love. You tried to "buy" him over and he exploited your gullibility & the end result is your heartbreak. Learn from your mistakes

      Delete
  74. Yori Yori Princess14 December 2016 at 18:15

    hahahaha Ideato the babe. I gbadun you very much. Choi

    ReplyDelete
  75. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 18:24

    Not settled at 40 years of Age😳
    My sisteh , he may be a good person maybe his ancestors are yet to release him into prosperity. We cannot conclude at this point until you meet with him.

    ReplyDelete
  76. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 19:08

    Poster....why do I have a feeling your name is chisom o????am I wrong?? Infact I can swear you are. Your story is too familiar

    ReplyDelete
  77. Anonymous14 December 2016 at 19:57

    My hubby is 15yrs my senior. No regrets, will chose him over and over again. Age is just a number., Your happiness comes first!

    ReplyDelete
  78. excited courtesy14 December 2016 at 20:11

    Age is not the main koko in marriage but love, respect and money matters alot than age. Older men can take better care of a woman than younger men. Fellow your heart and make sure you marry a man that loves you more than you love him.

    ReplyDelete
  79. booty24714 December 2016 at 23:30

    Hmmmmm

    ReplyDelete
  80. booty24714 December 2016 at 23:30

    Hmmmmn

    ReplyDelete
  81. booty24714 December 2016 at 23:30

    Hmmmm

    ReplyDelete
  82. Anonymous15 December 2016 at 10:04

    The secret of a long and lasting relationship is to marry a man that loves you and not a man that you think you love. Good luck.

    ReplyDelete
  83. Anonymous15 December 2016 at 14:17

    Life starts at 40 for a man so I don't know what you want,
    From your story I see that your priorities are mismatched and you need to do something about it.
    Also you are 26 and you feel you are still a small girl... My lady plants age away ooo and its called senescence... Think baou dat

    ReplyDelete
  84. Anonymous26 January 2017 at 14:58

    AGE IS BUT A NUMBER. GO GIRL

    ReplyDelete

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