Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Sunday In House Gists...

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Sunday, October 09, 2016

Sunday In House Gists...

Anyone got Jokes for us?..As a comedian that you IS nowwwwww..lol






There is free Lunch in Freetown sometimes nauuuu.

54 comments:

  1. None 4 now. Stella please do the anonymous post.

    Bv queen sheba

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  2. Haven't finish the ones provided by you o. Ezege 1 of blogging.

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  3. My own is just that God should bless me abundantly beyond my imaginations.sometimes I look around and see how some are prospering and i wonder if this recession is selective, lol.e no affect everyone abeg.I shall say there is a lifting up when others are saying there is a casting down,Amen.

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  4. Aunty stella what i saw in Firstbank Benin
    today wasn't funny at all.
    there was a long queue at the banking hall
    today, network was slow everyone was
    standing and most people even got tired,
    that was how a baby started crying in the
    bank and the baby was at the back of a
    very pretty lady, she was just trying to pet
    the baby when one "AGBAYA" man was just
    shouting "give the pikin breast make him
    suck..nor shame put, nobody here wan look
    your breast, open the breast give the baby
    because he dea disturb me"".
    i guess the yeye man wanted to feed his
    eyes not the baby.....
    BV Yuppiee lee.

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    Replies
    1. So bank dey open on Sundays in Benin.

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    2. Mind your grammar9 October 2016 at 19:25

      Buhahahahahah!

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    3. 19;23 today na Sunday?

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  5. Pls where is our very own chikito the professional runs girl.. I just hope her clients never use her do ogwu ego. Its not her portion abeg!! BVs let's pray 4her

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  6. Stellosky Kilode!!!

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  7. African parents be like, Glory, come and meet Uncle Maxwell, he travelled to America before you were born, you still remember him right?������...

    Biko how?������...



    They will also b expecting a "yes" from u...Nawa oo

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  8. Nigeria shaa!!!
    When the reward for project fame is
    5,000,000 and the reward for cowbell
    mathematics competition is 100,000. One
    person will now be telling us to read our
    books.
    Mtcheew.

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    Replies
    1. Abeg shut up if you don't know what to say. Cowbell Maths competition is N1,000,000 and an excursion out of the country. Their teachers also win about 500k and also travel out of the country. By the way who Project fame epp? If you like don't read your book. Olodo!

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    2. If u have fame go for project fame ,if u r brilliant go for maths. We r gifted differently

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  9. Stella na lie ooo nothing free jare

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  10. Mama nnuku pls dont bring in ur dry, boring jokes, biko

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  11. *Disadvantage of sleeping in Church!!*

    ```While in Church a lady dozed off during preaching she woke up and heard the pastor saying stand to ur feet!
    She stood up and saw the whole congregation in shock including her husband, she looked round and saw that she was the only person standing!!
    The pastor continued and said yes keep standing, we have 1 person standing already, now let me repeat myself incase you didn't hear me!
    If you are unfaithful in ur marriage stand up!!!
    The lady fainted!```😨😩😩😩😩😩

    stop_sleeping_in_Church

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    Replies
    1. 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

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    2. I actually laughed out loud. Very funny u.

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    3. Dwl.....😀😀😀😀😀😀

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    4. Lmao...i cant stop laughing

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  12. This morning, a neighbour heard us shouting 'snake! snake! snake!' at the back of the house, he ran out of the bathroom (located close to the back door) naked with soap lather all over his body and his JT dangling like school bell in-between his thighs. Hmmm, can this gist even win a recharge card? I doubt it

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  13. This morning, a neighbour heard us shouting 'snake! snake! snake!' at the back of the house, he ran out of the bathroom (located close to the back door) naked with soap lather all over his body and his JT dangling like school bell in-between his thighs. Hmmm, can this gist even win a recharge card? I doubt it

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    Replies
    1. Hahaha at least it made someone laugh

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    2. You made me laugh.How do I send you #200 recharge card and on which network?

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  14. JOKE, PLEASE DON'T TAKE IT SOUTH.
    Sometime last month, I applied for a job I saw the advert on newspaper without knowing the nature. All I cared about was the salary. On getting to the place of my interview, I saw two other men that also came for the same interview. One of them is Hausa, the other Yoruba and me Igbo.
    The owner of the company told use that it is a poultry work and needs just one person. Mehn, I be wan go but I remembered Buhari na presido so I stayed back for the interview. The man told us that whoever that able to feed the pigs 5minutes without complaining about their smell will get the job.
    As an original Igbo man wey I be, I 1st entered. I fed the pig 1min,2mins,3mins,....nna mehn!!! I ran out and told the man "Maka Chi, chairman this pigs dey smell bad.
    The Hausa man entered and fed the pig 1min,2mins,3mins,4mins,5mins...he ran out and told the man " Kai Megida, walahi this figs I dey smell no be small"
    The Yoruba man finally entered and fed the pigs 1min,2mins,3mins... Lo and behold the whole pigs ran out for the yoruba man and shouted" chai!!! Chineke, Yoruba man dey smell......... Fill in the gap because no be me go talk am finish. Lol
    Hahaha hhahahahahahahhahahaha
    Na joke oooo, one Nigeria

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    Replies
    1. Distasteful. We have many hilarious jokes about our friends from the East and North,but because they are unsavoury, we won't say them. We are clamouring for a saner Nigeria where there is less ethnic intolerance, especially with what the Biafra group caused with Kanu recently. You are Ignoring, so you meant disrespect, just like a white person calling a black one, a nigger. The church/ sleeping joke made us laugh: this one upset us. God help you.

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  15. JOKE, PLEASE DON'T TAKE IT SOUTH.
    Sometime last month, I applied for a job I saw the advert on newspaper without knowing the nature. All I cared about was the salary. On getting to the place of my interview, I saw two other men that also came for the same interview. One of them is Hausa, the other Yoruba and me Igbo.
    The owner of the company told use that it is a poultry work and needs just one person. Mehn, I be wan go but I remembered Buhari na presido so I stayed back for the interview. The man told us that whoever that able to feed the pigs 5minutes without complaining about their smell will get the job.
    As an original Igbo man wey I be, I 1st entered. I fed the pig 1min,2mins,3mins,....nna mehn!!! I ran out and told the man "Maka Chi, chairman this pigs dey smell bad.
    The Hausa man entered and fed the pigs 1min,2mins,3mins,4mins,5mins...he ran out and told the man " Kai Megida, walahi this figs I dey smell no be small"
    The Yoruba man finally entered and fed the pigs 1min,2mins,3mins... Lo and behold the whole pigs ran out for the yoruba man and shouted" chai!!! Chineke, Yoruba man dey smell......... Fill in the gap because no be me go talk am finish. Lol
    Hahaha hhahahahahahahhahahaha
    Na joke oooo, one Nigeria
    If na you, who you go give the job?

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    Replies
    1. Mind your grammar9 October 2016 at 19:31

      Very boring and silly joke! Yes, I would take it south because odour is not stereotypical to Yorubas. Mind you, the pigs will definitely run out for the Igbo man due to the fact that Igbos usually finish a bottle of offensive perfume on themselves. Choke on that

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    2. This really cracked me up, my eyes are so teary

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    3. Iranu....nonsense joke
      Shi o

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    4. so this one too na joke? I am not yoruba by the way. very irritating joke

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  16. OK here goes. Hope it makes someone smile or laugh.


    An Akwa Ibom passenger once boarded a bus in Lagos. The bus driver was an Ijaw man and the conductor was a Calabar man.


    The Akwa Ibom man said to the bus conductor, "Ah de ko ori oro."
    The conductor then told the driver, "Idi-oro wa O."


    On the way, the bus had a flat tire. The Ijaw man then told his conductor, "Zackson, get the zack, make you put the spare tire. Make you no allow us sleep for road in Nagos O."


    The conductor cracked up in laughter, "Oka Yohn, you dey call yack Zack, You no know say dem no go understand you for Dagos."


    One Igbo man then disembarked the bus in anger and exclaimed, "Ekolo Gbeja mi malu fo soke ".


    😀😀😀😀

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  17. HAPPY SUNDAY PEEPS!!!
    Just wanna share with u an achievement i achieved today meen hahahaha (pathetic)

    brethren i messed,i mean (serious gash) in a hall of about 200 peepz watching 9ja match (today),i was happy bcos i drove all of them out 4rm seeing zambia's goal,well a little boy later paid 4 the damage. . , hahaha. . , hapi sunday peepz

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  18. Riddle n joke

    I kiss my mother before I die what am I?

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  19. This gist happened to my sister's friend in abuja. The girl na correct runs girl wey they follow old man. My sister tried to talk to her BT she come dey insult my sis so my sis moved out nd got married. So back to the gist, on her wedding day this my sisters friend invited her sugar daddy to be d chairman of the occasion. So as time 4 chairman to give speech na e my guy carry micro phone o. Let's call my sister's frnd O. Naim chairman start. O is a very good girl, she is humble, caring, respectful nd very good in bed. Na there reception end o. D husband give am slap. Wedding finish at that moment o. Whether d chairman was drunk I don't know.

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  20. Passing through. Some boring jokes here

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  21. Happy sunday dear bvs hope u guys r enjoyin ur day.pls i need help to travel to abuja.all i need is to join anybody in his/her vehicle to get to abuja.i have an interview to attend by wednesday pls somebody help a sister in need.i promise to mind myself.thanks and God bless

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  22. SIX YEARS AND IN LOVE

    ajan kolo kolo.
    eleshi shi lori.

    They all chorused around her.
    Making fun of her hair.

    Fuming with a childish ire,
    I ran into their midst.

    Swinging the stick in my hands with a view of defending her worth.

    I was six and already in love.

    Her upper incisors were far apart.

    People called it eji when she smiled.
    I told mama I wanted mine like hers.

    Perhaps she would notice me then.

    Mum cooked ewedu the night before.
    With tiptoed steps, I paid the pot a visit in the midnight.

    Wrapping the stolen meat in a nylon bag,
    I slept with anticipation of the joy the next day would bring.

    Morning came, I danced around in gleeful preparations for school

    Mama was confused.

    *Is this not the same boy that cries all the way to school*

    She never noticed the sour taste of the soup and one missing occupant.

    Arriving at school, I ran to the vendor.

    *Iya bisi*
    *Bread and butter 15 naira*
    *lolli 5 naira*
    *Okin biscuit 10 naira*

    I was going to declare my intent that day.
    I was going to confront my Goliath that day.

    Like a soldier,
    With a well ironed shirt.
    Gator lined shorts.
    And,thanks to mama,
    Already laundered boxers
    Lord knows I did not want to be called *atoile* bedwetter.

    I marched towards primary 1b.

    *Hh-ee-lloo Aaa-yo*
    *I have a gift for you o*

    Raising her *pineapple* plaited head from her book,

    My Ayo smiled at me.
    Her cheeks adopted a brief tint of pink.

    *What do you have for me?*

    With a brisk eagerness,
    I brought out the nylon wrapped meat.
    Not sensing its rotten smell while gingerly placing it on her desk.

    *Nnnyaamaaa*
    She said adopting a disgusted look as she surveyed my gift.

    Heart Racing at the prospect of losing this chance to impress,

    I quickly brought out my other gifts.

    *See this one*
    I said
    Nudging the Okin biscuit her way.
    For I had noticed she loved eating it.

    Her eyes brightened.
    I had provided the spark.

    *You are fine*
    I said.

    Her heart softened.
    I had provided the magic words.

    *Will you be my friend?*
    I asked with an expectant look.

    *Okay* She replied.
    The assembly bell rung thus ending our batter.

    Two weeks later.
    Ayo and I patted ways.

    Who could blame her?

    For I had broken her Hb pencil approximately five times.

    I had pushed the playground swing too much while she sat on it.

    And I had failed to solve her multiplication table homework.

    Who could blame me?

    Ayo always wanted to use my money to buy Okin biscuit.
    *As if her mommy did not give her feeding money*

    Ayo always wanted me to play *tinko tinko* with Titilayo and Tinuke her friends.

    Ayo had made my mum spank me much for my informal visit to her pot of ewedu soup.

    I was six and this was my first encounter with love.
    #BASHORUN

    Check out more of these articles at okontas.blogspot.com

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    Replies
    1. Really? Are u sure u are okay at all. Is this ur blog? Can't you write one or two paragraphs and end with to be continued? Nonsense.

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  23. Just heard a story of a man who promised to repair his girlfriend's family house nd made them remove d zink nd disappeared*ROTFL* =)) =D

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  24. please where is portable viv,i miss her rude comments

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  25. There were none people travelling on a bus driver ask driver mate how many people are on the bus, driver mate replies 8people and one Fulani. Dats how the Fulani man vex come get down from the bus top.

    ReplyDelete

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