Omugwo Chronicles - 50

Hehehehehe...funny narrative..

I was reading through the Labour room chronicle about the crying oga which was so hilarious when I decided to send in my omugwo story.

I am from the west proudly Yoruba but i live with my husband in the south east. My mother and my mother in law are working class so none was looking forward to coming around. We were planning to go deliver the baby in America and the 2 grandma's to be started competition hehehe as God will have it my husband said he did not have sufficient funds so we busted the plan and we agreed that I should come to Lagos to stay with his mum at about 6months into my pregnancy and since my parents are also in lagos i can shuffle but my mother in law wanted me in her house without visiting anyone she has this idea of we have married you and that's final( very controlling but a very nice woman, I run all her personal errands and I became her driver)

I was trying to get my ICSA certification at the time. i go to library to read for my exams. I saw my mother almost everyday, the first time i told my mil that i had lunch with my mum she gave me an attitude for days. So i stopped telling her and i was enjoying the best of both world. My mil is actually very nice and we went shopping together a lot of times.

When I gave birth, We were to be discharged the next day, my mum came with her best friend and my mil came with my SIL and her own younger sister (48years old) who we decided to import from the village ...My mum felt the baby was too small to stay in a filled up car and that since my mils car was filled up that I should stay in hers my mil started a mild drama.hehehe.

 I was just laughing.

My mother in laws sister became the nanny and she helped me with everything concerning the baby, and the hot water bath for me too,there was a cook and help so basically i had no chores other than to breastfeed but here is the funny part ......

she told me she likes tea a lot and the cook complains a lot about managing things, i asked the cook and the man said she takes tea like 5times a day so I bought her 1tin of milo and milk she finished it in 1week, that was where the ritual started it became a weekly affair. 

When am going out she will ask me for money for call unit that she wants to call her village people, the first time she asked I gave her 1k the next day she asked again I gave her 500 and when I realised it's another ritual I started buying 200 mtn and give to her daily. 

She eats 2 hard boiled eggs a day. She eats suya everyday if you dont buy one night she will sing about it  till the next day. My cousin came to visit and brought provisions and all while i was out of the house . She finished it all and i did not know until my cousin said is it that the provision is too small or what? I asked her she said she thought the gift was for the person taking care of the baby.lmao.

When my hubby took paternity leave she became worse ,2 bottles of coke a day. she said one cannot quench her thirst. She collects money to make her hair from my husband, my mil and myself. One particular week I refused to buy her any provision I acted like my atm was not working I saw her using my babies aptamil and she said no wonder he has big cheeks.

 I can go on and on it was so bad anyone visiting she will ask them for money. Although, She was so cool and took care of the baby well but her "longer throat" was mind boggling. When I went back to base she called and said she wants to come visit I disconnected my phone and switched off. 

She called my hubby and he got home and said let's think about it instead of a nanny I said God forbid. She can beg a mother hen for eggs. Hehehe. 

Hehehehehehehhehehehehe...she actually took the baby milk and said no wonder his cheek is fat?hahahahahahhahahahahahahhaha

WNB coming up after Chronicles today.note that you should not open it if you are single.