NARRATIVE NUMBER ONE
ENVELOPED BY SHAME
Dear Stella,
I'm 25, a lawyer with a masters degree. My problem is, I'm lost and In a state of confusion. I just need God or anyone to find me. This is not the plan I had for myself.
Since I got back into the country two (2) years ago, no job, home of my own (living with my parents), car (drive my dad's car sometimes), glowing bank account...nothing and this kills me.
I do not even have friends (maybe 1 each in 4 states in Nigeria and 2 outside the country). Socialising with people has always been a problem to me even though when I do, everyone enjoys my company. I'm very beautiful but I don't know why I always feel 'not good enough'. I always avoid going out to places with so many people and hide myself unless I'm practically dragged out by a friend.
Let's not even talk about having a man because I do not have one and truthfully I don't think I believe in love anymore (No thanks to heartbreak and disappointments).
However, I have decided to give R/ship a try once again but all the guys I know have refused to officially ask me out. I know I do not know how to be in a r/ship anymore as I usually don't know how to act or what to say when I'm with them and maybe the dating game has changed but do men not ask women out officially anymore? Am I not good enough to be dated and wifed? (No, I'm not desperate).
Please what can I do? How do I find myself? Where do I run to? Why is God taking so long to answer me? Have I not tried enough? Prayed enough? What am I doing wrong? Can the person I may have offended not forgive me? Each day I wake up with a broken heart, I lay in bed and cry myself back to sleep.
How do I keep going on? How do I regain my faith back in God? It seems I'm slipping back into depression, how do i deal with that? Thinking of going off every social media even bbm cause I'm ashamed.
I want a job, house, car, man and kids. I want mine. What do I do? Someone needs to tell me please!
Thanks and God bless y'all.
.............................................................................................................
NARRATIVE NUMBER ONE
MARRYING A FRIENDS EX
*looking for red pen*
NARRATIVE NUMBER ONE
MARRYING A FRIENDS EX
I'm a biochemistry graduate awaiting service, i turned 20 this year..
HERE'S my chronicle
My girlfriend introduced me to her boyfriend early 2014 (let's call
him MR. Y), i chatted with the guy a few times and then stopped(the
chat was just casual, nothing serious )..
Fast forward to this year, the guy chatted me up and told me the girl
was getting married, I thought he was joking so i called the girl and
she confirmed it, i tried getting them back together but it was too
late as the girl was already pregnant for the other guy.
(i know it was for the other guy cos she and the guy MR. Y were celibate while
dating ) ..
SO me and MR. Y became friends, one thing led to another and he asked
me out, i agreed but was having mixed feelings about it so I told my
friend and she said i can go ahead and date him since she is married..
MR. Y is one of the sweetest guy i have ever met, the relationship is
pleasant and he is everything i wish for in a guy..
Now he is talking marriage but i feel awkward about it.. i don't know
if I should go ahead and marry him or not..
Please Stella,your red ink is so much wanted..MY fellow bvs,your
advice will also go a long way..
Forgive any gbagauns as i am multitasking at the moment.
*looking for red pen*
Really touching.
ReplyDelete20years old... I tire.. Em jay darling, what's touching about these stories pls? If I ask poster one say make we date, she go look me down say I no reach or rich...
DeletePoster two na slap you de hungry me.
To you Em Jay, others may hate u, but I love u.
Poster 1 : Take sometime off and clear your mind. You need so many things all at once. Of course any young sane minded person will desire them... What's on the top of your scale of preference list? Job? Man? Marriage? Money? Kids? If yes... Then How many? Are you sure this is all you need to be happy? Kindly consult with the Holy Spirit. ☺☺☺
DeleteWhat is really touching
DeletePoster 2 if you don't love him leave him alone nau. Seems like you don't know what you want. Since you aren't sure than call it quits with him
DeleteZombie and you must echo Stella's words.
DeleteWas it because Stella said the story is touching you decided to echo it or you didn't read the chronicles at all?
Delete@poster 1 just know that there is light at the end of every tunnel. Delay is not denial. Try as much as possible to make friend and go out some more. If not join a group in your church, it doesn't take much before you know you've got friends to mingle with, at the same time be careful of friends.
@poster two you don't have an issue or you want us to give you a go ahead? Aiit GO AHEAD with the relationship
Have so much missed all of you, because I hardly spend much time on the comment session of the ihn specially and most of the post here but in due time,that's nice of you stella, giving David a free space on your blog to advertise,clothes give away... I need also just that I don't think I will be comfortable putting on what someone has wore before, so make una bless ne ohhh with cash to buy a new one...looking to settle down, don't worry you will find ur better half soonest in jesus name.shokiiii I missed ohhhh, abeg all of the good samaritans, make una burst me card airtel, sub is almost finish.ill treatment from husband after 4th child: Stella you wouldn't have removed her number, you never can tell, she might as well be blessed like yesterday's chronicle sender. Women are suffering Shia, may your helper locate you ijn,car needed: I tape into your blessings, Memo to some singles ladies, sender I throw-way salute to you...I so much love ur write up, receive sense those who that message is meant for...500k sent to yesterday's chronicle I tape into your blessings. Battery about to die down. Baba God please pick up my own call. Bless me in every aspect of my life.
DeleteNarrative one: don't worry your blessings is on the way, don't let me tell my own story here as well but too many bad mouthed fellows here like ideato so I wouldn't go further so always talk to God in times like this he is always ready to hear us out. Don't worry hold unto ur faith, I so much feel ur pain,
DeleteNarrative two: go ahead with him and stop asking us questions, it's ur frnd not with someone else, not like if we advice you not to go further with him like you will listen so follow ur heart.
Poster 1, those who come to God must believe that first he is and the he is a rewarder to them that diligently seek him...seek God first and rest cos he makes all things beautiful in his time and his ways are different. And No,guys no longer officially ask ladies out, they just go with flow lol
DeletePoster one, u are going through some serious self esteem issues. Wen we say self esteem issue everyone think they are cool and therefore are not affected. You want pple on here to help ursef, baby u hv to be the one to find ursef by ursef. Stop ur pity party and go out and have fun, yes fun!! There areb no rules on wat or watnot to say while on a date, be ursef and do wat u do best!!! Do you!! Like i said, there are not written down rules on how to act, jst make sure u make ursef happy!! Always!!!
DeletePoster two.. biko put ur eyes down and be sure that man isnt playing wit u, if not marry him already!!! Ex ke esther ni.. dont marry untill u become a gwegwelina
P1. What u need Is to identify ur key problem and try to over come it. I was like u too,and still is sometimes. I was too SHY to a fault,epecially in d midst of new faces.
DeleteMy 2 cent ,av confidence in urelf,overcome wat ever is causing it and above all re-new ur faith in God.
Ha white berry! First buy brighter grammar na. Couldn't finish either of us comments.
DeleteLol... At 20... Shouldn't your career and twenties be your main priority? What's the rush to be a Mrs? Anyways.. You're the one that knows where your shoe pinches so good luck
DeleteUr*
DeleteMay God fix it for u @ poster1
1. Pardon me poster one but you sound ungrateful. Thank God for what you have, many are praying for what you have and cannot smell it. I put it to you that you are here codedly seeking for a husband, maybe even trying to land a rich one, just as yesterday's poster was codedly asking for money (BVs can come for me on this but I choputas not, kwakwakwakwa). Appreciate what you have before the door will open for better things. See people with way less still striving to make it.
Delete2. I wanted to give you some words of advise when it came to me that you are only 20. Are you sure you have experienced life enough and you are ready for marriage? If you are sure put it all in prayers and be observant of who your guy really is. Focus on the future and how you can sustain your home with your husband. Also how compatible are you two. Why are you feeling somehow when your friend gave you the go ahead? Look into this and pray. Peace!🙏✌
1. Pardon me poster one but you sound ungrateful. Thank God for what you have, many are praying for what you have and cannot smell it. I put it to you that you are here codedly seeking for a husband, maybe even trying to land a rich one, just as yesterday's poster was codedly asking for money (BVs can come for me on this but I choputas not, kwakwakwakwa). Appreciate what you have before the door will open for better things. See people with way less still striving to make it.
Delete2. I wanted to give you some words of advise when it came to me that you are only 20. Are you sure you have experienced life enough and you are ready for marriage? If you are sure put it all in prayers and be observant of who your guy really is. Focus on the future and how you can sustain your home with your husband. Also how compatible are you two. Why are you feeling somehow when your friend gave you the go ahead? Look into this and pray. Peace!🙏✌
If you want to have a male child, sleep with your husband the day you ovulate that is the day you feel a sharp pain in the right or left bottom part of your abdomen
DeleteI hate to hear "at this age shouldn't this and that be priority to you?". Is there a compulsory sequence to life? For some, it's marriage, kids, school, career. To others, it's the other way round. If she wants to get married at 20 then so be it! Isn't it the best time to think about something serious esp as she's done with school?.Hian!
DeleteFerragamo life is in stages. Hate it or not.
DeletePoster one you probably need friends around you.if u don't mind u can paste ur pin here.I'm also in need of a friend whom I can hangout with.Im a graduate but i have no frinds or man in my life.I'm 23 tho
DeleteWednesday's chronicles is here again.
ReplyDeletePoster one, I wish I could know you. I am a very noble guy from a good home, educated and calm. Not from a rich home though.
DeleteBut me too de look for job, while running my masters. And I know broke ass guys aren't allowed to date on this blog even when the guy na husband material
Poster one, I recommend the books "I KNOW WHO I AM by Pastor E.A Adeboye and "FAITH, BIBLE STUDY COURSE" by Kenneth E. Hagin . These books really helped and are still helping me to know my place and right in God.
DeleteLol. Says who?
DeletePoster 2 do what makes you happy but I can't date my friend ex
ReplyDeletePoster 1 Am 26 and I feel. Exactly d same way but I av channeld all my frustration into praising God in anticipation..wat I do ryt now is pray n Re-strategise..Trust me I knw ow u re feeln..i read ur post n I almst wondered if I sent ds 2 stella...D only difference is dat I do business..been struggln 4 start up capital bt am convinced God isn't asleep n he's deftnly gonna do it in his time..Dont gve up..He wd surely put an Amen 2our prayers n we wd 4get d cry days..Pls listen 2 Kirk Franklin 'Imagine me' often am sure it will help..2016 isn't ova dats so am prepared 4all my miracles..pls be prepared too..
DeletePoster 2: it seems u just felt like sending chronicle oo.The ex of the le boo has said u shud date she doesn't want again cos she's married ehen do u want God himself to come down n tell u same? Besides these same story of marrying a friends ex we treat it here often.Oya, pls goan date him e hear, you have nothing to worry about.
ReplyDeleteLol problem is poster 2
DeleteLol problem is poster 2
DeletePoster 1, you have inferiority complex and I'm sure among all your male friends. Some have tried to brush the subject of dating you but you have looked down on them.
ReplyDeleteFocus on one thing at a time.
Stop driving daddy's car if you can help it. No man will see you driving and chase you in his own ride to woo you.
People need to see you more to get to know you better.
Work on your pride too and you'd see how fast people will warm up to you.
Pretty or beautiful people are already assumed to be proud because of their beauty. People won't even believe you are single.
So you need to make your self reachable to those who want to know you more. Be accommodating towards people.
Everything will fall into place in time. At 25, you have done well academically.
Poster 2 oh well the ball is in your court. You already started dating him, what were you expecting to come out of it?
Your friend is cool with it, and who isn't someone's ex? Someone will marry your ex too.
All the best.
You have said all doppelgänger
DeleteGood advice except the stop driving car to be seen part
DeleteMy dear, you are already depressed emotionally, dont use suffer and add to it before keke/bus drivers insult your life then you run back into your shell.
How many reasonable toasters have you gotten while trekking under sun? minus married men o
Dont compromise ur comfort. Simply join a church group and always wear a smile
Men DO actually chase you when you're driving. Flashing lights to get your attention. There's no philosophy to getting a man. Trek, walk, enter bus, keke, bike or flight. When you posses a certain aura you will be chased and toasted. She doesn't have confidence and she feels having a good job or husband will help her. Confidence is within. It's unchanging.
DeleteMen DO actually chase you when you're driving. Flashing lights to get your attention. There's no philosophy to getting a man. Trek, drive, enter bus, keke, bike or flight. When you posses a certain aura you will be chased and toasted. She doesn't have confidence and she feels having a good job or husband will help her. Confidence is within. It's unchanging.
DeleteWell said Chikito!..
DeletePoster one calm down please. Change the way you think. Go out and have fun. Appreciate yourself if no one does.
ReplyDeleteposter 1, Hmmmmmmm maybe you should drink Sniper and end your misery
ReplyDeleteAre u okay??
DeleteAre you retarded?
DeletePoster 1,
ReplyDeleteYou made a mistake by going back to that dead country called Nigeria without a job waiting for you to grab!...
Well,I will advise you to go out more often and socialize..don't be in your room masturbating,sleeping and eating all day...yes I know you masturbate everyday!...
Poster 2,
Don't go and marry him,be there asking some stupid questions...
1) I feel your pain dear
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry for all you've been through, that's life for you shaa oo. Stop asking God questions and keep on praying, my sister continue praying until something wonderful starts happenening!
You need to have faith that all your prayers has been answered and stop doubting God. Your miracle is on the way.. just hold on okay! *bear hugs*
2) You are still young and not that experienced about life;if i may say.
Like i told the other 19yr old poster, calm down my dear. Find a good job first, make sure you are independent on your own. Date the guy for a while, get to know him better before you consider marrying him.
It's never good to rush unto things to avoid painful, heartbreaking mistakes! I wish you luck
Poster 2. Aunty 20years chill small. Don't be in a hurry to get married bcos service year is another phase in one's life.
ReplyDeleteP. S : I comment regularly because I'm jobless.
Oh and poster 1, try your hands at internship since the big jobs aren't coming. The economic situation isn't letting many companies hire right now.
ReplyDeleteYou need experience too to attract the big jobs even with your many certificates.
They'd be too scared to pay you because you probably are more qualified than those already employed.
Try smaller jobs, gather the experience till a better one comes.
And while doing that too, a man will surely come along because you will get to go out everyday.
Kisses!
Poster 25years old.you better pass somebody oo.you better pass me.i am also jobless,BROKE,indebted to 6 people almost one million,homeless(staying with relative) I am fat,booless,single mum and wait....35 years old! I have also relocated back to naija but shishi no gum me.i wish I am 25 years old like you and can still look at the future with pride.i am a disgrace to myself .I don't even have an account .wetin I wan keep inside? Of what use is a degree and certifications without jobs? In fact you have hope.let me go back to my favourite pastime.tears.
DeleteLord give me a reason to smile before my 36th birthday on Nov 3 .I am tired of keeping up appearances
Don't mind her, her problem is that she is used to having things her way and for once it is not happening like that, she wan finish. Abeg poster, roll up your sleeves and be stronger. Know that you will survive. Know that God has plans for you. Do whatever you can do no matter how small or acquire a skill, just don't be idle. That is why James is telling you to drink sniper. In Naija you have to be strong ooo. At least your parents are ok as I can deduce from your tale. Some out there are orphans. Just be positive and thankful to God. If I tell you my story you will chase yourself out of this blog.
DeleteYou seem to have given up on yourself. Pick yourself up, take brisk walks every morning, do portion control when eating, be positive, join a group in church basically for encouragement. Keep ending out your CV. Don't give up.
DeleteDont mind her @anonymous18:50, at least her parents are alive. I lost my dad in primary 6 and my mum in year 1, i served 4yrs ago. No job till date, no uncle or aunty cares, its just been God. Now i sew and by God's grace i shall get there. I cant even think of ending it all cos i'm down NO! Rather i call upon God and besides i have alot of bastards to prove wrong. That poster one should even be thankful she sees her parents and is under their roof.
Deletep1
ReplyDeleteso in this state you still want to go off all social media? you should look for a volunteer job to keep you sane. you can register with an NGO and from there you get to meet people, make friends and also improve your resume.
as per relationship, if you dont go outside your circle, you might never meet anyone. so make an effort to go our and carry yourself with poise and am sure you will meet people.
p2
there nothing wrong as long as she said you guys can date. you already said hes everything you wanted in a man. and if your friend was preg already at that time, that means she was the one that left your bf to date someone else. but make sure you know the real reason they broke up and its not that its something you cant deal with.
Poster 2, hmmmm.you do not feel awkward dating him but marrying him.please,tak true.
ReplyDeletePoster 1, Sorry! Pray to God...You will be fine, amen
ReplyDeleteSorry to derail, but this is just an observation.
Stella, it's ok to have favorites on the blog & I know this is your blog but don't you think you need to give other people a chance?
This is in respect to today's IHN giveaway comment for Thelma; pls i'm not trying to rain on her parade or anyone else's name I might mention before this comment is over, but it won't be bad if you allow givers chose their recipients without your interference.
I believe there are other people on here who genuinely need some form of assistance or the other, but for the fact that they aren't well known BVS, no one notices them. I keep seeing comments from one like that who needs a container, and another who needs assistance to Start a lingerie business.
If i'm not mistaken, Thelma was among this week's recipient of a certain giveaway.
Try to consider others; it doesn't have to be the known regular names all the time. Thank you
Please post. I was polite.
Really polite... Lol
DeleteAbeg leave Thelma, it is her luck and Gods' grace acting on her behalf. Life ain't always fair. She must be doing something right. Stella D'Kork abeg leave am like that. When it is your time to shine it is your time to shine. The water wey be your own no go pass you by, lai lai.
DeleteQuickie with the sharp tongue, abi the sharp fingers. Always comments with a hard edge. But for real, I like you like that. We all can't be sweet.
Anon 18:56 aka Thelma, na only u dey dis blog? Shebi dey ve been giving you Oya u too surprise us and sow this 20k to someone else's life too
DeleteAnon 21:37 I am not Thelma. Can't you tell by the tone? No, because your jealousy no go allow you see road. Abegi shift, mtcheeew
Delete@Poster 1, you're 25, living with your parents in a comfortable house I guess, driving your dad's car, a graduate with M.sc, my dear, thank God for your life, did you want to know how many people wish to be in you shoe right now? Please start thanking God and try to hang out. If you're not an out-going person, send your contact to Stella to post here, you will have more than enough friends to hang out with.
ReplyDelete@Poster 2, well, your case is not the first and it won't be the last as well. I just realized one of our course mates married her best friend's bf. Although the bestie have like 4 other guys she's dating as well and she claimed she's celibacy with this very guy her friend married. But before we left school, they're worst enemies and we don't know what causes their conflict until of recent when everything broke out. Also, the bestie too just did her intro with one of her other bfs.
But since this your own friend already gave you the go ahead, I think you're free to do that. But I don't pray to find myself in your situation, unless if I don't know them when they're still dating
*Larry was here*
Touching indeed..babe that is 25 wont you thank God for life first?? there are lots of graduates above 30 that are trusting God for Job, Home, husby, Car, kids and all the good things life can offer.if u were in their shoe only God knows what you would have done now.GOD PLEASE VISIT US THAT ARE TRUSTING ON U.
ReplyDeleteAbeg help me ask her o my sister, u are 25 and u think that's d end of d world? Go out and socialize pls, who knows ur husband is just thr waiting for u to come outta ur shell. May God help us all, amen. I kno and believe this is my year of divine marriage and breakthrough in Jesus name.
DeleteI decided to remain anonymous dis evening..lol
Abeg help me ask her o my sister, u are 25 and u think that's d end of d world? Go out and socialize pls, who knows ur husband is just thr waiting for u to come outta ur shell. May God help us all, amen. I kno and believe this is my year of divine marriage and breakthrough in Jesus name.
DeleteI decided to remain anonymous dis evening..lol
Stella saving the red ink since yesterday's chronicle.
ReplyDeletePoster 2, Hmmmmmmm What is your problem again?
ReplyDelete*sigh*
ReplyDeleteIf I answer these two now one anonymous and kristy or what is her name will come and pee under my comment.
But really, what's all this? Poster 1- ever heard of an attitude of gratitude? You are 25, you have a foreign masters degree, a roof over your head and parents that can give you car to even drive. And you're here complaining and looking at the things you're yet to have. Don't you read chronicles of homeless, hungry, abused victims here. And you have a supportive family with good education and you're depressed?
I think your problem is your comparing yourself to other people. Ignoring your own journey. For Gods sake you're 25!!! What's wrong with you?
Poster 1. Haalla at me coz all u need is a friend
DeleteFriend to gbensh for free abi? You try well well.
DeleteGod fix it @ poster 1
ReplyDeletePoster 2 marry him
You dont have problem post 1 stop worrying over nothing and enjoy your life
ReplyDeletePoster 1
ReplyDeleteA 25 year old female/male living in his/her parent's house in Nigeria isn't that much of a big deal. In fact, living alone is the 'crime'. Pray for a good job.
Poster 2
My comment won't change your decision to marry him.
20yr old... Men I don old o so 2nd poster at 20 has to audacity to type this rubbish and share on social media?
ReplyDeleteAs for 1st poster. My question is to you Stella... Why do you constantly insult our intelligence by posting such rubbish? Mtscheeeeeeew @ both posters
20yr old... Men I don old o so 2nd poster at 20 has to audacity to type this rubbish and share on social media?
ReplyDeleteAs for 1st poster. My question is to you Stella... Why do you constantly insult our intelligence by posting such rubbish? Mtscheeeeeeew @ both posters
poster 1 you need to run back to your creator, tell him what you want, serve God with all your heart, win soul for the kingdom of God, why are you crying cos you do not have a man in your life, husband and kids are not the only good things that can happen to a beautiful girl like you.
ReplyDeleteGive God everything you have, stop praying for job, husband, love but start praying for souls into the kingdom of God. change your prayer life, serve God as if your life depend on it, make your self happy, love yourself, never you compare or complain over your life. God loves you so much.
lastly, read why men love bitches and why men marry bitches, after i read both books my life,relationship changed for good. All the best.
Poster2 you don't need any advice. Your gf is married and more over she was celibate with Mr Y during there relationship.
ReplyDeletePoster1: if you have to since that chorus on this blog, trust me when i say you'd have a large choir with same rhythm... Ur case wld even be far better than most, you don't even want to hear their plight, you'd realize ure even enjoyin compared to most.... Look for ways to find happiness my dear, its an everyday struggle, you don't want to (R)est (I)n (P)eace when thrs more to live for.
ReplyDeleteHang in there.
Sing*
DeleteNo more GOTs, hmmm.
DeleteGod please grant your daughter her heart desire.
ReplyDeleteGet yourself empowered before marriage in case of rainy days. All the best.
You two have no issues. Poster one, there is nothing wrong with you dear, you should even be lucky for the achievement you have at your age. Look for a job which musnt be centred around your profession, participate in social media dating, who knows love may find you there and lastly look for something to learn and dont iddle away, there is nothing wrong with you.
ReplyDeletePoster two go ahead and marry him, I use to have same belief as you
Poster 2 nothing bad in marrying him.if you love him carry go..
ReplyDeleteJust take it to Gid in prayer.
Poster 1 may God fix it for uu.
Love must surely locate you soon..
poster 2 why are you looking for red pen? if you love the guy and he is everything as you said, please go ahead and marry him after all your gf is now married and she is not interested. I think you are just confused cos you are still very young, go ahead and marry him, make sure he is really serious with the marriage thing.
ReplyDeletei hope he is not looking for a way to enter your something? make sure you do not give him something until your wedding night. All the best darling and congrats in advance.
Poster1:my advise for you is to draw closer to God, don't give up just yet, I understand how you feel cos I'm in ur situation.
ReplyDeleteYou see, you have to be keep your joy even when things are going wrong around you, tell the devil he can't steal ur happiness. Let me share with you what ive been doing.
1.i got a lot of tapes that address my situation, like I said I'm in a similar situation and mine is as regards relationship, so I got books and tapes that talks about relationship,I'm 34 and not in a relationship not to talk of marriage or having children.i learn a lot from Bishop oyedepo's teaching.
2.i committed myself to the work of God, I decided to be more dedicated, I've been a church girl all my life cos I grew up with my guardian who is a pastor. So try to seek God's Kingdom first and all others will follow.commit yourself to Kingdom service.
3.i praise and pray from 2am-3:30am daily, and in my prayer time I also pray for all those in my shoes, all my friends believing God for a partner.
4.i sow seeds regularly concerning my marital destiny. There are soo many men out there but I want God to position me to find a good one.
5.study your Bible more, remind God of his promises concerning your life, know scriptures that addresses ur situation.
Dear poster one, you can also begin doing all these. Our testimony is on the way.
Abeg ooo I can't wait for your testimony. See tips! God bless you.
DeletePoster 1 God has not left you. Look at the bright side. Stop telling God why me. If not you na me. May be you need deliverance from powers affecting your Father house. It is well.
ReplyDeleteStella where you keep your pen, Abeg look for it. Poster 2 GO AHEAD
Jeje you are right she may need to fight this spiritually and not even know it. Poster one, oya prayer ati fasting ti take over.
DeleteWatery chronicles *yawning and passing
ReplyDeletePOSTER 2, U DONT NEED A RED PEN DATZ Y STELLA IS LOOKING FOR HER RED PEN....BABE UR GIRL FRIEND IS MARRIED NA WETIN? MARRY D GUY IF U REALLY LOVE HIM.
ReplyDeletePOSTER 1, TAKE UR TIME AND GO BACK TO GOD IN PRAYERS SOONEST YOU WILL FIND UR HAPPINESS IN DUE TIME......MAKE UR SELF HAPPY
What is touching here. Normal chronicle.
ReplyDeletePoster 1, Let me ask you the following questions.
ReplyDeleteAre you ashamed of being alive?
Are you ashamed that you can move your body and do things by yourself without being at the mercy of anyone?
Are you ashamed that you have two degrees? Do you know there are many people out there struggling to get money to wrote waec.
Are you ashamed of having a Roof over your head and even a car to drive?
Are you ashamed of having food in your kitchen?
Are you ashamed of having a loving family to lean on?
I could go on and on but If the answer to all of the above is NO, then I think you owe God a huge apology. In all things Be grateful. Some have it worse.
The things you want will come at the appointed time. Don't sweat over it. While you're waiting please build your self esteem and get busy! You'll be amazed to see how inconsequential the 'keeping up with the Joneses' syndrome on social media will become.
Poster 2,do you need your village chief priest to knock some sense into your head? Marry him!
Write waec* please.
DeleteHehehe!
P2 whad do you need Stella's red pen for when you dun even know whad you want. Cus from ya write up, I dun see any reason why you shouldn't marry him except maybe you ain't ready yet or maybe there's something you ain't telling us.
ReplyDeleteAngels dey this blog ooo please someone should assist I need a job desperately.
ReplyDeleteMSC holder
25yrs old lawyer pls come nd marry my bro inlaw hes single nd searching. He's a medical doctor and owns his own hospital. But i need a mail or contact.if I post my contact many people might claim to be u,drop urs below my comment nd u won't regret it.bye
ReplyDeletePoster one you hear? Abi you see? Oya drop your contact.
DeletePoster 1....there's nothing happening to you that is new,trust me. U are the problem. 1st of all u have to free yourself from the prison u have put yourself. How can you say u don't see yourself being "gud enough"? Dts really extreme. Work on ur thoughs pls,u need to be positive then gud things ll begin to happen in your life.even if pple advice u here it ll still amount to nothing with those thoughts of urs
ReplyDeleteP1,Money answers this chronicle.
ReplyDeleteForget about finding a job for now n think about going into a biz(if you ve the finances)
#Who ever thinks money doesn't buy happiness should deposit it in my acct.
Poster 1. You are in the waiting room and your time will soon come. Until then, get busy. What is your passion? Any hobbies? Maybe you can volunteer somewhere? Try to do something with your time right now because when you pass into the next stage, you will find yourself longing for these days of leisure. Do not compare yourself to others, everyone has their own pace. Do not feel ashamed! Do not feel ashamed! I agree with your plan to get off social media. It only breeds discontent. God loves you, He hears you and He sees you. Be patient but get busy doing something, anything.
ReplyDeleteNarrator one look to God I speak to you from experience. Trust absolutely on him with faith knowing that one day he would make all your dreams come true. There was a time I was at the same point with you, but I turned to God with one understanding "whatever God cannot do let it remain undone" knowing fully well that he is the God of all flesh nothing is too difficult for him to do. Today my story has change God has done all things well for me. Don't think of how he will do it just keep praising him and see God beautify your life. Serving God pays.
ReplyDeleteMy sister if it gels, marry him. Same happened to me. He was my friend's ex, we kinda of grew up together. When we started getting close I wasn't interested cos of my friend but he had even asked her in advance and she had no problem with it and called me to let me know. So if your friend is fine with it don't let anything else hold you back.
ReplyDeleteWhy do people condemn themselves a lot? Madam poster 1, you already know your problem, you need to socialize more to get a boo.
ReplyDeleteyour case is not the worse, step up your game, every other things shall be added.
poster 2.
Follow your instinct
Poster 1: Kindly visit the nearest MFM church for deliverance
ReplyDeletePoster 2: Pls marry the man
Lol@poster 2, you agreed to date him, marrying him is not a big deal.
ReplyDeletePoster 2..Please why is it awkward o..your friend never slept with the guy so what's the problem. .mbok go ahead joo and pray about it.
ReplyDeleteposter 1, you really need to calm down, and trust me everything would be alright, you dont have to go off social media, but am sure you see everything going on there and you are wondering if you are the problem. all you need is a time out. on top of it all you really need to talk to someone about what you are going through and how you feel. dont you have siblings or arent you close with either of your folks? my reason for asking is that, you might find it easier talking about things like this with a family member than a friend, i know i might not be 100% correct. i have been down that road before and i can only imagine what you are going through, my sister and mum were there for me all round, infact i was suicidal. but thank God for God am very much better now, its not that everything is perfect right now, but am positive and very hopeful. you should try as much as possible to make friends and go out more, that should take your mind off things. P.S dont over think things, everything would work out fine. just stay positive.
ReplyDeletePoster 1, all you need is to love yourself and focus on God, everything will fall in place. I went to a wonderful private uni in Nigeria, 5years, no guy ever askee me out. I was always feeling inferior like no body likes me, I hardly went out, only to church. I finally a guy in law school. Later went for masters n things went abnormal again. No love from anybody, was always in my cold room. Got back from the UK, no job! But those moments got me closer to God. The story has changed today. Happily married with a child, wonderful job, wonderful relationship with God. Things just fell into place. Just relax and let God! Cheers!
ReplyDelete@poster 1, wish we cld be friends as i feel lonely at times too...anyway, hope u are applying for jobs and nt jst sitting at ome waiting for daddy to do somefin...i statrted applying for jobs immediately i started nysc(even when popsy told me nt to that he was gonna sponsor my masters, but i knew he cldnt as there was no money and i cld see it). i hustled during service for job went to offices, applied for wvwn small companies, registerd on push cv, jobberman etc..finally a week after service i got a call for interview at union bank (didnt tell my parents about it till i was called in dec to pick my offer letter. i advise u take applying seriously and move out of the norm or mama and papa telling yoy they will find and no job is too small to begin with. secondly at least you have papa's car to drive. i got none and it is nt an issue cos i knw in due time everyfin will fall in place. so in other words, start serious apllication for job,go on nairaland (leave the men for nw and focus on building urslf, everyfin will fall in place in due time. by the way my parents stay in the north and i av been in lag for over 6 mnths without dem and i am jst 23 and surviving. so dust urslf up dear. God will definitely answer u. wish i cld drp my no here for u.
ReplyDeleteChronicle looks boring, dried, flat today Stella abi ur folder don empty ne?
ReplyDeletePoster 2 you don't have a problem
ReplyDelete@poster1, I think you need to lower your expectations in terms of the job search maybe you should stop looking for something in line with your profession and just start anywhere be it teaching, office administration etc it will help distract you at least you'll have a place to go to everyday and from there meet people. Pls stop expecting the guys you already know to ask you out love can happen anywhere anytime with whoever so stop worrying so much about that. What of your church? Can't you join a youth group in church? It will help you mix with people, increase your daily activities and you never know you can find what you're looking for from there be it career, relationship etc. Pls try and snap out of the depression cos at the end of the day it will only cause you more pain.
ReplyDeleteVery touching
ReplyDeletePoster1.....hang in there and don't give up on God.
ReplyDeletePoster2..... accept his proposal nd stay happy..
*Faithful bv*
Go ahead marry him dear since ur friend is married . Pls WHO knw about this buiz called cryptocurrency? They said is all about buying Coin, Pls can someone enlighten me on the buiz ? I want to invest small money on the buiz But i Hope is not 419.
ReplyDeleteLol..Stella red pen has gone MIA since yesterday..writer rubbished our lovely and cherished red pen..abeg sis look for d pen..ironically, I feel a chronicle without d red ink is incomplete *my myopic tot thou*
ReplyDeleteP1
ReplyDeleteJust be patient with God. I need to b e your friend
P2
HML in advance
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
ReplyDeletePoster 1, participate in Stella SnM. Even if nothing serious happens, it will help you get in the groove for better options. Also, you need to find that inner strength because if you don't you might attract men that will emotionally and physically abuse you.
ReplyDeletePoster 2: Do you truly love the guy? It's like you're looking for reasons to break up with him.
@stelladimorkokokus you be real case...which kind pen you dey find...wicked you😀😃😃
ReplyDeletePoster1:I don't think there is anything wrong with u,get something doing like learn tailoring or baking, when u go out more u will meet people. God bless u. Poster 2: you don't have any problem besides why are u asking us Jamb question!!
ReplyDeleteSince you accepted to date him, I don't see any reason why you should be uncomfortable settling down with it. It's only a step further on the journey you began long before now. It's your choice plus your friend is cool with it. No biggie.
ReplyDeleteGo ahead n marry him u r nt doin anytin wrong.
ReplyDeletedont worry... Gods timing is different for ours.... he will remember you and hey!!!!! chill and enjoy life is too short to worry too much about things beyond your control
ReplyDeletePoster 2, follow ur heart seems ur frnd said u should go ahead . poster 1,God guidance be into u
ReplyDeleteHmmmmmm
ReplyDelete@post1 please concentrate more on your self and keep praying
ReplyDelete@post2 you are in the right position to decide that, if u really love the guy to the extent of spending ur entire life with,then who am i to tell u other wise. best of luck
Narrative no 1.. my dear I understand how u feel, regarding the job situation.. i was there( speaking with faith) cos I know the God I serve is a living God.. I am a lawyer too and since I finished service for over a year now.. still no job.. @ a point I was depressed.. I mean so dispressed but i trusted in the words of our God, who says he has plans for us and good ones at that.. through out this week I feel God has been speaking to me.. in various ways saying this trying time will soon be over through various words of his prophets and the silent voice in me, even just now read IHN today that's what stella also said.. so key into the words of God.. don't stop believing.. know he is still the God that answers us when we think we can't go on.. he is still a miracle worker.. he is still In the job of answering prayers.. just don't loose faith.. keep trusting in him
ReplyDeletePoster 1 (I pray you see this)....I was once in your state. In fact I have failed my last professional exam three times),no job,no money, popc wasn't helping matters,i go for interviews and nothing....please don't give up yet,Pray & Fast,Praise God, try and talk to people (this made me happy) . Remember @ one point I cried to mumc" but now,we are all happy. I got a small job and am happy
ReplyDeleteDear Poster 1, I'm like you. The only difference is I studied industrial chemistry with a masters degree in same field. Identify the key to the solution which is u. How will u meet the guys if u do not socialize? I didn't have friends but I spotted out activities I like such as helping the needy, so I joined a philanthropic organization. I met like minds there. The economy is terrible so be patient while searching for a job. Be positive, everyday is pregnant with possibilities. Read more, pray more, just be happy. I have made myself believe everything will work out well for me. It doesn't have any choice. Please don't entertain any thoughts of anything or anyone obstructing your greatness, you're what you believe.
ReplyDeletePoster one i feel your pain coz im in same shoe as you. you even have parents and drive their car, i have got none of that. Just squating with a relative and dont even know for how long. some times i feel like .....explodinding....i dont even know the right word to use. but i try to make myself feel better by singing praises to God and also somehow forcing myself to be happy while hoping for the best. The lord is your strenght. Dont give up.
ReplyDeleteDear Poster 1, I'm like you. The only difference is I studied industrial chemistry with a masters degree in same field. Identify the key to the solution which is u. How will u meet the guys if u do not socialize? I didn't have friends but I spotted out activities I like such as helping the needy, so I joined a philanthropic organization. I met like minds there. The economy is terrible so be patient while searching for a job. Be positive, everyday is pregnant with possibilities. Read more, pray more, just be happy. I have made myself believe everything will work out well for me. It doesn't have any choice. Please don't entertain any thoughts of anything or anyone obstructing your greatness, you're what you believe.
ReplyDeletePoster 1 is so me, I'm very shy plus introverted buh I av more friends than her, I don't go out and I've never been in a relationship either. I'm 21 and always worry I won't end up a gwegs, and yes I always feel I'm not good enough... Esteem issues.
ReplyDeleteI read yesterday's chronicles on the woman helping her husband and most people were forming "Don't marry a broke ass or jobless man"
ReplyDeleteI ask myself, if most ladies here are hooked up to a comfortable men
1. Who are those who post their numbers for single mingle.
2. Those that beg for recharge card and school fees, where r they from
3. This rich guys are from US abi, coz men dey complain about economy.
Chai, people can pretend sha
Young awyers in Nigeria are not happy financially. Just try and look for a law firm and practice, that one too is 'suffering and smiling' but u just hv to start from somewhere.
ReplyDeletePoster 1, I am going through the same thing. I've been at home since 2014. Lately I just shifted gear into IT and abandoned my law degree altogether. God is your strength.
ReplyDeletePoster 2. I'm sure your friend wouldn't mind you marrying her ex, afterall they were celibate. Besides she's married, so I'm pretty sure it's ok!
ReplyDeleteposter, and i forgot to mention, draw close to God..you need him nw and he is worth it more than any man you are finking of
ReplyDeletePoster 1, please be grateful for the life you have because you are not suffering, don't feel bad about your situation; thank God you use this platform to speak out. I am touched by your post.
ReplyDeleteIf you're really interested in a relationship that will lead to marriage, i will advise you drop your contact (email or phone number). My immediate younger brother seriously need someone, he's not a master degree graduate though. But he has wisdom and the fear of God.
He is also financially capable, if you end up marrying him, you will live in your own home not a rented apartment, drive your own car, maybe also do business together.
The choice is yours. My brother is a shy person though. A believer and follower of Christ and also he is still a virgin.
So, the ball is on your court poster.
But please, whatever decision you take, don't forget that God loves you and there is someone for you waiting to locate you.
Poster 2, why the doubt now when the deed has already been done? You should have given it a deep thought when you were chatting your friend's boyfriend up, the truth is; you've always wanted the guy, now you have him. I can't even imagine how young girls can go ahead to befriend a man who has already slept with their friends (Desperado things). Is your conscience that is judging you.
Poster 1,i feel your pains. Please dont pay too much attention on the things you dont have yet, God is aware! Learn to be thankful for what you have nd Start to love for yourself. Dont get yourself worked up because you think someone is getting very easy in their. The truth about life we all have go through pains, we have South moments. Learn to count it all joy! Get books that can lift your spirit nd help you get closer to God... Hugs
ReplyDeletePoster1. SOCIALISE please. Be active in church groups Abeg that's a good place to begin. Try Daystar Singles Fellowship.
ReplyDeletePoster2: How did you get here? Were you forced into this? Please talk to your momma she understands you better. My take is you are still young and cannot decipher what you want yet else you wouldn't be bewildered at this time. Now talk to your mum to help find your feet. Please take care of yourself and d guy.
Hope u aren't hiding the actual issue and then blaming it on an awkward feeling? This story is incomplete I think I am confused already.*side eyes*
Chronicle don come oooO
ReplyDeletePoster1,you are not just the only one having problem with finding a man,I think the problem is most guys think all the beautiful ladies are taken already so the don't bother asking them out.
ReplyDeleteOh my God! Poster 1, I'm just like you. I have also asked those questions too, I'm also confused, but I still believe in God. I'm also a lawyer.
ReplyDeletePoster 2, you have started dating him already, If you love him, you can marry him.
Poster1 I know you have every right to feel bad you arent where you have worked hard to be, but trust me you have food, accomodation, fathers car etc.. Many out there with masters from UK and US dont even have all that. If you ask me, you are overthinking things.. Calm down and keep searching, the job would come and the right guy would locate you.. Just persevere
ReplyDeleteAbeg nothing is so touching about these chronicles. Poster one, you are not serious. If you want to beg please come out straight and beg. What do you mean by things are not working for you? We Nigerians have occupied our minds with evil thoughts to the extent that non-existing things begins to manifest in our lives. (Madam, no one cursed you biko) We are always in the habit of exchanging laziness for curses mstchewwww.
ReplyDeleteIt is not everyone that is destined to work with their certificate. Don’t you have talent? Can’t you learn hand work and grow on it? You are waiting for govt. job lwkmd. That means this your funny story will keep coming up.
If man and marriage na your problem, do yourself that favour of participating in the next coming S&M. Don’t bother us again biko. You have masters yet you are as confused as an illiterate. What I’m I saying self? Some illiterates are better off bec they don’t keep their mind idle.
You had better get busy.
Poster two, you have no case abeg. Sop trying too hard to prove a point. After all you have been fucking him so what again?
Poster 1 you need to move closer to God and serve him with the potentials He has deposited in you, then wait and see His Goodness in your life and how your life will change for good.
ReplyDelete. No energy to write much . God who showed me love will show you love as well. Nothing is wrong with you. U ll get a job. Love will find you and God adores you to pieces.
ReplyDeletePOSTER 2, EVERYBODY IS SAYING MARRY HIM MARRY HIM! NA WA. PLEASE DONT MARRY THAT MAN, FIRST HE HAS NO QUALMS CHATTING WITH HIS GIRLFRIENDS FRIEND? SORRY TO SAY BUT HE FANCIED YOU SHA. BUT MY QUESTION IS IF YOUR FRIEND AND YOUR HUBBY ONCE DATED MARRIED OR NOT THEERE WAS ONCE SOMETHING BETWEEN THEM AND CAN BE REKINDLED OOOOO. HOLD YOUR TWO EARS AND HEAR ME ....IT IS TOO CLOSE TO HOME OO, WOMEN ALWAYS TRUST YOUR INSTINCTS PLEASE. THIS COLD FEET WHEN YOU DEY GET NA WARNING SIGNAL ALREADY JARE
ReplyDeletePoster1, lawyer with a master degree @ 25 and you want to fall into depression ? Lol some people are 30+ no certificate, no career no job, no husband, no kids, their folks are looking upto them even in their helplessness.
ReplyDeleteYou have a rich father n can cruise his car n a shelter, n you are complaining.you need slap
Asanwa please help me tell her
DeletePoster one. I am a young lawyer like you. I don't have a foreign masters degree and I am doing Ok in my job. My situation is not much different from yours even right now with my Job but I placed everything in God's hands. Pick a hustle poster. Forget about a car. It will come in due time. Think about getting a job. Don't focus on the big ones. Start small. I moved from place to place until I got my current place. Trust me if I get anything better, I will still move. I edited my Cv though so my movement will not show. You can edit out your foreign matters when applying to small firms. Then when you get the job focus on applying to bigger places. I am a lawyer also. You can send me your contacts or pin via email so we get to chat. Your friendship circle can start growing. Don't forget God too. It is well.
ReplyDeletePoster 1, ur chronicle is so touching. Firstly, having a good job, car, house, friends and a partner is normal and everybody's desire, however this shouldn't validate our lives or determine fulfillment. The truth is u r young and academically qualified and only a matter of time b4 u get these things u crave for, so don't give up on urself or give in to depression. Regardless of ur situation love urself and be optimistic about life, then u can radiant the right energy and aura to attract friends, husband and increase ur social network. I advice u join a group in ur church or change ur church and this ll introduce you to a new crowd and fresh perspective. Don't worry u ll be fine....only u can stop urself so don't give up on life
ReplyDeleteit is well
ReplyDeletePoster 1 I am sending a big warm hug your way already. You are way more blessed than many in this world and I want you to step into gratitude mood. If you are a Christian, please worship with churches with lots of youth and find a arm to serve there, leave daddy and his wife to their church. You don't have to get a job as a lawyer to be fulfilled, tap into other skills you have inside of you and apply for jobs in other field. You can also start up your own business, clothing, costumes, skin care, hair products, baby clothing, diaper to mention a few. People are making sales on bbm chanel, Instagram etc. You can also choose to go clubbing once a week or every 2 weeks, dance away and enjoy your youth now. This is self love, watch how your spirit will be lifted and such attracts good friends and suitors too. Wishing you all the best
ReplyDeleteMrs Bee
Poster 2: if you love that guy or have a thing for him I will advice you marry him. I am married and the truth is I haven't seen many of my old friends in years not even the used to be best friend. At the end what matters is marrying the right man and having your own happy family
ReplyDeleteMrs Bee
Poster 1 just love ur self, get closer to God and pray, it doesn't take time, it only takes God. I love u., poster 2 ur friend is in support, it's like u don't love him?
ReplyDeletePoster 1: Am happy u were bold enough to share. That first of all... A step in the positive direction and things are gonna turn up if you remain determined. It's very easy to be sad and also to be happy. That choice is entirely yours to make. It's gonna be alright just hang in there and believe, there's nothing God can't do. All he ask is for you to believe and trust him. While searching for a job, why not delve into something you love, it doesn't have to pay you, that might give u fulfilment. Try to reduce the number of time u reflect on the negatives.. see the positive sometimes. And remember this "it only gets better"
ReplyDeletePoster 1: Am happy u were bold enough to share. That first of all... A step in the positive direction and things are gonna turn up if you remain determined. It's very easy to be sad and also to be happy. That choice is entirely yours to make. It's gonna be alright just hang in there and believe, there's nothing God can't do. All he ask is for you to believe and trust him. While searching for a job, why not delve into something you love, it doesn't have to pay you, that might give u fulfilment. Try to reduce the number of time u reflect on the negatives.. see the positive sometimes. And remember this "it only gets better"
ReplyDeletePoster one, you are a bit spoilt and you have low self esteem, anyways I am a lawyer too so I feel ur pain. If u are in abuja drop ur watsap number under my comment and I'll reach u. I can help u by
ReplyDeleteA. Being ur friend
B. In ducting u into the suffer head that's the legal profession in Nigeria
C. Motivate the hell outa you...lol am good at motivating
And finally, relax...you are too young to kill urself worrying over things that will eventually happen. I promise u that if u wish to marry, you will eventually marry so please relax
Much love sister
@ poster 1- Believe me 25 is not old. You sound like som1 u has had it easy all ur life dats y dis is hard 4 u. In time everitin will play out. Most importantly, dnt think low of urself. It shows, no matter hw u hide it, it'll emit in ur aura. Look in d mirror n c ursef as a Queen.
ReplyDelete@ Poster 1, you are still young, focus on the job aspect and finding yourself. Relationship shouldn't even be priority for now. All the best
ReplyDelete