When to talk about s3x or how to use a condom between parents and their children is the topic many tend to shy away from but controversial Dr. Stella Nyanzi will do it with ease and in a matter of seconds, she will be asking if the child has any areas that need to be clarified.
"I had the 'condom talk' with my eleven-year-old daughter. I explained the dangers of unprotected s.3.x, without blinking. Feeling like a Ninja-Warrior, I pulled out a packet of black condoms.
She asked about the colour. I told her I preferred condoms that look like the real thing. Luckily, she did not ask for details about the colours of things."
"So I talked about the tip of the condom and how it is important to squeeze out the air before rolling it up the waiting specimen. We practiced squeezing gently in order not to tear the tip."
"And then I talked about disposing of the condom after using it. I was careful not to leave out any age-appropriate detail of condom-use for my darling daughter. And then I asked if she had any question."
When they switched to the Q&A session, the daughter asked how big it can be when blown with air ....In the pic, Nyanzi is seen doing just that.
Away from the condom talk, the MISR researcher who is still on suspension for gross misconduct is all smiles following a shouting headline; 'Makerere VC Kicks out Prof. Mamdan.' It should be recalled that Prof. Mamdan was the reason she undressed protesting various issues at Makerere Institute of Social Research (MISR).
UgandaOnline
*I dont even know the best age to talk to girls about such stuff....scary having a child that is ingorant of what s3x entails...perhaps the earlier the better?I dont know abeg!
I have just gone through this woman's timeline, permit me to say she is sarcastic.
ReplyDelete...TAG A FRIEND, COMMENT & PRAY 4 SDKBLOG...
Dere is nothing wrong with it. Afterwards.
DeleteMost children get pregnant at the age of ten and so forth
11 is too young to talk about condoms n their uses or showing them,at that age one should start telling them the different changes they are to except in their bodies then create room for them to know that they can ask you anything so that they wouldn't go asking outsiders.
ReplyDeleteShut up!!..grls r getting raped at age 4 or evn less sef!!!....Mothers need to let their daughters know !!!!! How to prevent UnWanted Babies n how not to be A BABY MAMA!!!!...
DeleteToo young u say? Wen some kids dey start to gbensh at same age?
Delete@anon 15:37 You don't have to be insolent to make your point. This is a public forum and requires people to be civil to have a fruitful discussion. Barr. Oma just made his/her opinion (which she is entitled to). If you have contrary opinion please present it respectfully and we all will learn from it. No need for this undue abuse. Hope this make sense to you.
Delete@Barr Oma. You are very right. But I believe sex education should have started subtly though age 3. Because of what kids (jet kids) are exposed to these days (via media, ict, and even adult talks that slips from relatives' mouth (kids pick what adults tell them or what whatever they hear from adults often stick to their imagination) and also to protect them from pervert in and out of home (eg schools, church, creche et al) u need to start building confidence in them (putting their age into consideration and as well as their environment because a girl of seven in Lagos will be thinking and talking like a teenage of fourteen what kids are exposed to must be considered but most importantly, their age)
DeleteMhh, odikwa very risky.
ReplyDeleteI have been ttc for 8months, doctor placed me on clomid and said I should come back for flushing (hydrotubation). Pls, has anyone gone through this? I'm kinda scared and worried but I think I ovulate and my period is regular. Pls help oo
DeleteAn End time mother
ReplyDeleteHmmmmm,not easy ooo
ReplyDeleteWell, depends on the approach used.
ReplyDeleteSome parents give their children sex education, to prepare them for when they want to starting having sex.
Others give their children sex education, but still educate them about the numerous advantages of abstaining till they're married.
The one I still fail to understand, is a parent shielding their children from the truth about sex and everything sex related, because they don't want them to start having sex before they're meant to.
That is total bs!
That child will learn it all from someone else. And that someone else will probably teach them practically.
I'm of the opinion that a child; a girl child especially, who is old enough to speak and understand, should know the difference between a penis and a vagina.
Should know when a touch becomes more than just a hug.
Should know that nobody is meant to touch them on their privates, except mummy, or daddy, when he's bathing them.
Reason why most paedophiles in this country, get away with their crimes, is because they know that their victims don't know what's going on.
So, they threaten them to silence.
That is why a someone can be comfortably molesting their neighbour's child for years, and nobody will find out, maybe till they gets pregnant or they molester is caught in the act.
Boys aren't left out,either.
Parents need to be more than prayerful concerning their children.
Knowledge is power.
#WhiteDiamondOut
Get*
DeleteThe *
#WhiteDiamondOut
I totally agree with you. Give them the sex talk in very simple sentences that they can understand. You can also use objects around them, or characters from cartoons or children's movies so they would easily understand and remember. African parents pls develop a bond with your kids. Bring them closer not push dem far away.
DeleteRight!
DeleteWhy not tell her to abstain from sex at that very young age
ReplyDeleteFunny enough they are teaching them in schools already because when an Uncle comes visiting and it falls off his luggage, you will still talk The Talk. So do it sanely now to support what the teachers already did.
ReplyDeleteThe day in the villa DH caught a stupid 20 year old Uncle with boxers halfway down giving and begging our 3 year old daughter to touch his dick and bite, he was telling her to bite it, it's gala. He already gave her a condom to blow and she was holding it. Na God save us.
Best age? At 5 or 6 about to enter school where she'll mix with different kids. All sorts come from home as gists, you will not be there. So prepare their minds ahead.
*your breast is mia-mia, your bum bum is wee-wee*. Nobody touches them
* keep your skirt down and your pants up always*
Too many jare, like 30 rules.
The person you least expect is the one that will try to use it on your child. No, not as protection against disease but as a play bait pretending to teach her how to insert and roll it, from there? Other things happen.
God protect the children.
What?
DeleteYour husband didn't wring the idiot's neck?
Kai!
Who knows the diseases he wanted to gift the innocent child.
'It's gala.' Just imagine. They know that most children that age don't know better.
Lol @ your breast is mia-mia.
You try sef. I no get time for the fancy words. Vagina is vagina, penis is penis.
They should just be told that it's not something they're meant to go saying outside, as it's adult stuff, but they should know, just in case.
But it's each parent to their own, yeah?
You're right. Play bait. A lot of people who were molested as children, had it done to them by a relative or close family friend.
They should know that no uncle nor aunt, has the right to go certain places. Even if there's a big painful boil there, only mummy can see it.
#WhiteDiamondOut
Jeez! XP hope you guys cut of his D***, what rubbish?
DeleteMissed you babe
A five year old should be able to name all the body parts even the genitals, teach them about the private parts and how they should protect it, it's the red zone, nobody should dare go close to your red zone, bite off his hands!!!! Scream with all your strength and make sure you report to me!
DeleteHope that stupid UNCLE didn't go free...pervert!!!
DeleteWhat!? God will punish that person!!!
DeleteWhite Diamond...imagine a man with enough muscles reserved for years and had to use it in one day. The boy received 4 blows from DH and since then his life (dentition) has never been the same.
DeleteJust tell the kiddies early enough, they become self protective. Baby give me a peck or kiss and they tell you *No, I'm sorry I can't*.
Now we use a Child minder to follow them out. Shikena.
Jbaby...I missed you too o. Too many thongs to monitor only bit one person. It is well. Jollof rice dey this weekend?
Ha! Gala?! I hope you people beat the living daylight outta him. Mchew
DeleteGeez! Siccck!
DeleteWhat in the devil's name is wrong with some peeps? So many mentally unstable ppl roaming the earth. Arrgggggh!
ShanzEmpire
Lwkmd!
DeleteI just imagined it.
Serves the heediot right!
Every tooth brushing incident, would be a reminder.
Mtchewww!
#WhiteDiamondOut
If parents do not teach their kids about sex, they will learn it elsewhere.
ReplyDeleteChildren are very inquisitive, they ask simple innocent questions like why do I have this in btw my legs and she has something diff in btw hers?...never avoid a 'teachable' moment with your kids, even when your child is stuttering, shy about a particular topic or question, take it up with boldness and TEACH, just stay confined to the questions asked especially for little kids.
You should be the first person your kids should run to when he/she is curious not the uncle outside or the Aunty outside. Be an 'Askable' parent, that's the best gift you can offer your child.
Worked under MDG FACOL during NYSC and I learnt a great deal about dealing with kids, you can start teaching them about sex education from Age 3 but your language should be age appropriate.
I remember d first time I had sex,we were both virgins n didn't hv any know abt condoms.
ReplyDeleteHe tore d pack,brought out d condom,unrolled it and tried to fix it on his penis.
Unfortunately,d condom stopprd halfway we tried and tried but to no avail so we decided to manage d condom dt way.As we begun,d condom kept in removing and it was frustrating dt was how he just annoyingly removed it and we gbenshed raw.He was 18 n I 14
However,he didn't succeed in disvirgining dt day
He succeeded in subsequent meetings tho n I knw for sure he went for lessons fr his frnnds and was able to use it right then
Mouth open @ 14 thats too young.
DeleteDon't you think is bad to talk about that, at that age
ReplyDeleteShe needs to know the day she starts her period but the best is to teach abstinence and how to avoid being rape and what to do in the event,
ReplyDeleteIt is #expect
ReplyDeleteEvery parent with their respective style of training A child..in my opinion tho,i think what actually matters in the course of sexual education for teens is for your child to understand the basics about adolescence,changes in hormone,being environmental conscious,rape,sex and some other little things..at least that way;they can beware of cousins,uncle,Aunty and co who would wanna take advantage of them cos they feel they are naive in that aspect..but parents talking about condoms depends on how far you think your child has gone in terms of age and mindset..cos in my opinion;teaching A child about "condoms" at 11 year doesn't make much sense..like what does she need that knowledge for at that moment? Is it A go ahead for her to start having sex with protection?? Or for her to say "please use condom" at A point of emergencies like rape??
ReplyDeleteWhatever the reason is tho;i dont have an issue with the professor..cos to her;delay is dangerous!! Perhaps,she is her child! So,whatever rocks her boat...but alldsame,parents should note that there is always A time for everything in life..
@MARTINS ABOY
Have you forgotten how very private you were as a teenager? Teens can be very private and secretive especially when it comes to sex education; however, if parents had spoken to their children early about sex, it increases the chances of them approaching their parents when difficult matters arise.
DeleteDon't expect a teenager to come asking you questions about things you ran away from as parents while he/she was growing up, they will do their research on their own, even when you bring up such topics, they won't believe everything you say.
Eleven is too old..just a month back while in the villa for my granpa's burial, an 8yr old girl fell pregnant for a 25yr old keke rider.
ReplyDeleteToo say I was shocked would be an understatement. It was my first time seeing a pregnant Lil girl, she didn't even look pregnant.i am still traumatised by the event cos she lives two blocks away.
So when I have kids, I will have the talk as early as 3 years old, and every year after that..
Thank u.
DeleteI am telling u oo
DeleteDis matter is serious, 4 me I don't think 11 is too young, wit internet, peer grp n d way things r in dis generation, I think 4m 8,dey shuld b introduced 2 d basics cos d things happening in d world of 2day can nt jt be imaginanble. My opinion.
ReplyDeletei will teach my child sex education at the age of 8 cant shout abeg. will teach her bout her privates, what will happen if she let boys play with it, why she should tell me if anyone touch her privates. it doesnt have to be awkward.
ReplyDelete@ Xhlrted P @ Pipi Lee and @ White Diamond..... You guys nailed it.
ReplyDeleteThanks
DeleteLee...Thanks
DeletePls oh everyone in the house, my son of ten years has started having sexual feelings. And is like he started it like 3years ago. Whenever he enter the toilet he uses soap and water to massage his p***k. We never knew all these was going on until yesterday that he was cought. This act has make him not to concentrate in school. Pls what should i do to help him control this feelings Because obviously I can't kill the feelings and also how to make him concentrate in school? thank u all
ReplyDeleteHian!
DeleteYou need to talk to him o. Tell him everything about sex.
And about erectile dysfunction too. No, he's not too young to know about the dangers of masturbation.
He should be made to understand that a man with ED, would hardly satisfy his wife in future, and it could affect his marriage.
Ask him if he'd like that to happen to him.
Arm yourself with knowledge from the Internet. Tell him no lies, because if he finds out that you lied about one single detail, he'd see everything else concerning the topic, as lies.
Before you know it, it'll be accompanied by pornographic material.
Hopefully, he's not gone deep enough he can't be brought back, seeing it's a very evil and addictive habit.
Talk to him boldy, make eye contact. Make him understand that you're always available to answer any question he might have to ask about the subject. Even in future.
Put him in prayers too.
Good luck.
#WhiteDiamondOut
Make him understand the gravity and implications of what he'd done. Don't shout or scream or want to kill him unless he'll rebel. Correct him in love, it's an addiction he couldn't help. I would have said take him to a pastor but God gave him to you. You're his pastor and guardian, just ask God for wisdom to make the right decisions. When he has gained your trust, his mouth will run like tap. Ask him how he learnt it and from whom if there's any. Find out what triggers it and eliminate it. Then you can take it from there. I hope this helps.
DeleteI will just start teaching my kids now thanks.
ReplyDeleteBut true true this your picture Stella up there is the size of some guys dicks. Just like head of okro.
ReplyDeleteOh baby learn well o
ReplyDeleteYou can talk about sextet with your children as soon as they can comprehend things but not condom useat age 11. You sshould be discouraging them from having sext and not encouraging them to have seen at 11.
ReplyDeleteGod will help us all.
ReplyDelete