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Thursday, July 07, 2016

Most Embarrasing Moment In 2016

 I know we have several 'Most embarrassing moments' post on this Blog but have you had any recently?funny?Naughty?Really bad?Gist us!






Dear Stella,
 i woke up very thankful to God yesterday.  My brother requested that i bring something to him on my way to the office yesterday so i asked that we meet at Airforce Junction. I decided to wear a shirt and a skirt to the office, i was feeling so sexy... before i proceed let me say that i am not good at wearing under wears eg thight,etc. immediately i got down at airforce junction, trust me now, i started cat walking, i noticed a guy trying to say hi to me, infact my shakara increased and see me eyeing the gentleman.

I think the guy got tired of it all and decided to break the news to me  " sister your skirt is torn!!! 

JESUSSSSSSS...

I was mute for some minutes, infact the guy said it and just walked far away from me like i had one disease.... 

Hey stella i won mad.... 

I started crying, i didn't know what to do,... 

luckily an elderly man at the motor park saw me crying and drove close to me, he immediately asked me to come in and we started looking for tailor together oh... infact to cut the story short, we drove from airforce to Rumomasi before we saw a tailor and afterwards he drop me at my office at Rumobiakani Opposite Obio Cottage...



I just want to appreciate the elderly man, God bless you ohh... And for the nice guy that told me about my skirt, Thank you too, i just want you to know that am usually not shakara person ohhhh and that is not my real face ohhh.


*LMAO!

213 comments:

  1. Hahaha.
    Grab cold stone ice cream .
    Relaxing to read comments.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Pls shift for me

      Delete
    2. Make i join you. I get enough to share sha but no time to type.

      Delete
    3. Most embarrassing moment was wen i tot my head was strong, went out to a burial and drank palm wine, my people, na wake dem wake me up wen party finish but for were? I was jst blabbing. Dunno wat happened but i found myself at home.... Till today dey call me umuwine

      Delete
    4. Hope nobody decodes me sha......, btw since den i havnt gone for any function

      Delete
    5. Me na when I go all night. Pastor say everybody kneel down wherever you are, me sef kneel down. Pastor com start prayer, na there I for come sleep. I don sleep go farrrr the next thing I hear people dey sing dey clap hands. As I open my eye na so the white bulb dey shine well well omo una need to see me and people wey dey my roll just dey look me how babe like me go sleep forget herself, the kind embarrassment wey finished me I come swear say I no go ever go all night for my church again. Lol

      Delete
  2. Replies
    1. A 5yr old blonde girl, refused sitting nxt to me in the train, her mum didn't understand why, she kept crying & sayin No No & clinging to her mums denim, i also looked confused.... Till she finally said "His black skin will stain my princess dress".... I just smile, then the mum sat inb/w myself and the naughty girl.

      Delete
    2. Atheist, seriously? 5 year and already a racist? Wow!!!

      Delete
  3. Careless dresser with torn torn pant sorry skirt..lol

    ReplyDelete
  4. Oooh!!! Great
    Grabs popcorn...sips ice tea!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hahahahahaha... That was funny.... U think say the guy wan toast u... Women eh

    ReplyDelete
  6. The day pad fell of my pant inside market, hmmmmmm!

    There is this pad I bought it doesn't have glue at the bottom like 'always', it was just shifting from one edge to the other, before you know, it fell, I can't explain have I felt, I just carried my property and ran.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Stingy girl.
      U even dey stingy to ursef. Tufiakwa!
      Buying stiff glueless pad.
      N na una sabi curse pass.

      Delete
    2. Lie lie.... How loosed was your pant?

      Delete
    3. Hahahahahaha. Lol. I can only imagine your embarrassment. Pele.

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    4. So u knew it didn't have glue and u wore it without a tight in ur skirt. 😳😪😥😰😰😓😳

      Delete
    5. LMFAO! Choi

      Delete
    6. Hahahaahahaha @how loose is your pant? 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

      Delete
    7. Omo wtf. Mehn that one bad, e bad pass the one wey period go stain your clothes. I prefer make period stain my clothes than pad with blood stain fall from my pant. Hahaha kpele

      Delete
  7. Worst embarrassment in 2016
    I fell down inside gutter at express,i felt like dying the day

    ReplyDelete
  8. Lol, I can't remember any now, will be back later, lemme think* shines teeth *

    ReplyDelete
  9. Lmao @ d poster's story but how do ppl feel wen they don't wear undies....? Hmmmm nawa o. I can't fit biko even inside shirt I must wear camisole.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Replies
    1. Eyahhh.
      James just learnt ROTFL...and must torture us with it.

      Delete
    2. @pink shell.. Stop harassing my husband

      Delete
    3. How old is this James guy?

      Delete
    4. Lmao @Pink shell. Na wa o

      Delete
  11. heyyyyyy........ i no fit laff oh

    ReplyDelete
  12. Lol. Mine was yesterday night ooo, my flatmate is always in the habit of bringing home her boyfriend and they will be having sex in her room not minding that am home. I came back yesterday night and heard them moaning like mugus cos they didn't hear when I unlocked my door. Funny enough everywhere was dark and her own room open. I just went closer to her door to hear what the man is saying cos he used to say funny things when they are at it. (I've peeped once sha), na so I stand there de listen and zammmm,nepa decided to do more harm than good by bringing the light. Lo and behold the man was facing the door. But my girlfriend was under and facing the other side. The man paused,and was just looking at me. Na so I looked at him with so much disgust, turned and tiptoed back to my room so my girlfriend won't hear me. I just e keep it to himself
    I was so embarrassed for the two of us.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. But why do people confess their sins when having sex but can't confess their sins to God?

      Delete
    2. omg this is absolutely funny

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    3. HaaahaaahaaahaaaHaaahaaahaaahaaahaaahaaaa!!!!!! I was still rolling with laughter @ the poster's story till I got to yours and I just 'fainted' haaahaaahaaahaaa!!! Thou art crazzzy!!!!!!!! Wow!!!

      Delete
    4. Dead

      This post will not kill me I swear

      Delete
    5. This really cracked me up..OMG!

      Delete
  13. But @poster since you no wear pants or leggings, didn't you feel breeze or fresh air entering into your something?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lmao!
      I don die!
      Fresh breeze....lmao!
      Maybe she wore grandma pants.

      Delete
    2. Jamusi I give up on yhu

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    3. Me no like undies when I dey wear clothes. I don carry yansh finish I go come still dey wear load again

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    4. My NYSC days in Delta,had this Roomie that changes girlfriends every 3 days.D guy doesn't have money but d gals keep coming.They would gbensh,shout, curse eat my food and to top it up,my Roomie would ask for T.P from me to give his gals,I would stay outside with mosquitoes sucking away my blood,it was terrible.I was dying,no GF on my side to save me.Na so one day,as one of the gals came,dey started gbenshing and screaming, I just vex come lie down for the bed(abeg I tire,mosquitoes Don do enof now).They didn't even blink,na so dem continue with d speed of thunder.... Mehn I felt so embarrassed.

      Delete
    5. Jack Brenda you must be really yanshful

      Delete
  14. Lol,still thinking if i should share mine,didnt happen in 2016 tho.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Share Shantelle, you are one effortlessly funny babe. Still laughing at your transcriptions on that Fayose lady.

      Delete
    2. Shanz baby your ID is sweet

      Delete
  15. That is not my real face hahahahaha

    ReplyDelete
  16. Shame always de leave Blog Visitors, come de catch me...
    People like EmJay, James, Mrs Romas, Cherry, Mother Confessor (whore), XP (highly connected), Nwa Amaka (Liar), Edo boy.....

    ReplyDelete
  17. LOL. I wore my cousin's shoes she had never worn, to church. According to her, she's had it for over 3years. It wasn't my kind of shoe,but it fit my dress. I went to dance in front of the altar, and while we were dancing, the sole of one leg just removed! WHATTTTT!!!!! This cant be happening to my fashionista rep! lol. Let me go back to my seat nau, second sole FIAM! OMG! I almost entered the ground. That day, I vowed never to borrow anybody's thing, cos it felt like a set up! lol.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LMAO!!! I can so relate to this, cos happened to me May this year. Though the shoes 'fell' apart in the car, and I was so grateful to God. Imagine dressing up looking so tush only for ones shoes to give one an epic disgrace. My mommy had a great laugh @ me that day.

      Delete
    2. I'm actually crying with laughter, I swear if my baby wake up il just begin to cry for real....

      Delete
  18. Lolllz @that is not your real face... Kpele dear

    ReplyDelete
  19. Lol


    Funny




    Still thinking 😔..






    Brb.






    @Galore

    ReplyDelete
  20. Lol@dt is not my real face.

    ReplyDelete
  21. lol! mine is my less than 1 year marriage that packed up. Shame no even gree me dey comot for house. SMH

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dont be ashamed its not your fault. Hold your head high and do you.

      Delete
    2. Eyah dat one pass shame my sister

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    3. I feel u,wen mine happened it was as if I am d talk of d town and can't bear to look at odas esp wen dey look at me wit deir pitiful eyes

      Delete
    4. You cheated and he threw you out hence the shame.

      Delete
    5. Had it tough making the decisions to walk away. Guess what? Am getting married again!

      Delete
  22. I was sexting wit a guy last week and I went to answer someone @my door only to come back to my phone and drop the freakiest lines to a wrong number. Actually my parish priest. I never go church since then and he called I no pick. BIKO no more sexting

    ReplyDelete
  23. There's this stripper I was lashing without paying a dime! I was rily feeling fly cuz I wasn't paying (trust me dey lash the way they dance and have an insatiable sexual appetite 😍 ) thats how one faithful Monday morning after I had 'collected'her destiny omo na so babe bill me o and I was robbed the week before, omo see me dey beg stripper like mumu 😢 because I was held hostage and work was calling.... all in all sha I pyess bwest but I no give belle 😚 😛 #truestory

    Kelvin Dat Edo Boi ( Stellz Cousin )

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Kelvin u take pride in lots of stupid tins, but dis one tks d cake.
      I hang around men, n u are abt d only one I know who wld boldly say he sleeps with a stripper.

      It shows u cant muster enuf confidence to woo a babe n so u rada pay for it.
      Or u cant satisfy a babe n so u settle for random hookups.

      Delete
    2. Lol don't be fooled! This is just one of my excapades! Drop ur digits and see me woo u! This is a blog gagool! 😉😚

      Kelvin Dat Edo Boi ( Stellz Cousin )

      Delete
    3. Ewo next time you no go try am again. I hope say dem no empty your account

      Delete
  24. Mine was this morning I attended morning mass only for me to stand up for communion I realised my gown is torn I almost died,hubby was like manage I said "i no dey go receive na by force"? Somehow i managed to go and receive communion till now I still dey find obioma to amend the gown.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Lolz, I'm sure when next a guy is stopping u, U wouldn't even let him finish the word hi. Sorry dear

    ReplyDelete
  26. I always do strong girl that never will I fall under anointing in church, but my people God got bigger plans for me.

    Wore a skirt too that day with no tight or whatever just pants

    Chai when pastor begin pray that day it was as if someone pushed me na so I fall flat for ground carry two legs up.
    Chimo! I knew everything was in the full glare of everybody but I didn't know how to control myself.
    My mum just rushed and covered me with wrapper and whispered in my ear God don catch you today

    Since that day I dey package well before I go church.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lmao, seriously? I too am waiting to get slain in the Spirit.

      Delete
    2. You be mammy water? Why you dey falk for church? Ogbanje things

      Delete
    3. I can never wear tights under a skirt, funny enuf na gstrings I dey wear under skirt as I tink its tacky to trace ur pant lines.
      The day my zip go fail me, na free show be dat(but its unlikely, as I tuck in most times)

      Delete
    4. Hahahaha...na me form strong girl pass o, still waiting for that day.

      Delete
    5. I always make sure I package well for church oo, I don wan disgrace, some people you will even see their wigs flying coz the anointing got a grip of them.

      Delete
    6. Exactly.... Na G-string for skirt all the way.... That's y I almost died when the guy told me ohhh

      Delete
    7. As in ehn, to fall dy always hard me

      Delete
  27. Hahahehihihuhuhohoho.no be ur real face bare.

    Don't have any 2016 embarrassing moment yet Nd hope not to. The one that happened in 2013 is enof for me mbok

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Gist us na

      Delete
    2. We can manage your 2013 embarrassment

      Delete
  28. Lmao @ that is not my real face ooo.

    ReplyDelete
  29. hahahhahahhah yeeee literally rolling on the floor

    ReplyDelete
  30. Lmao! @that wasn't ur real face.

    ReplyDelete
  31. Yep mine was four month back. Went to zenith bank to deposit some money for a friend coz the crowd was much I decided to take a seat. Mhen while I had this toaster who has been on my case since last year who happens to be the operational manager in the bank stealing glances at me. I Ignore the dude until it came closer to my turn. As I stood up I dint know I had already stained my gown with blood i headed straight to the next person before the teller. I noticed every one staring at me ,a few seconds later a lady called my attention to it and I was so embarrassed, oooh gosh and to tink I was forming fine gal since I entered the bank ehn made it even worse for me to take a step.
    I dint know what to do. I was confused I was already close to the teller and the crowd was much .thats when my toaster suddenly appeared and ask if he could help I said yes. I handed over the money with the deposit slip and he ask me to wait for him to take me home. Gosh I was so ashamed everyone was looking me. Well he took me home and i ended up staining his car seat too and it was so embarrassing. Good thing was he was a gentle man. He Had to drop the car at the car wash. Hmmmmm terrible experience. I have leant to walk around with a pantiliner or a pad in my purse or bag to avoid future unexpected period disgracing me anyhow.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You are just a dirty girl with your disjointed grammar

      Delete
    2. No she is notnot Anony 15:48. Happens to the best of us

      Delete
    3. Because she was real about her period wahala you talk say she dirty? Anon 15:48, biko which gender are you? Mtcheeew. Babe Steffy I enjoyed your gist and that your toaster turned knight in shining armor. I know what it means to be stained publicly, very embarrassing and worse when there is no one to help and the thing be rushing like...hmmmm, worst experience ever! Biko we need more understanding females and more gentlemanly men, thank you.

      Delete
    4. Really? and you couldn't enter into the rest room and clean your skirt and replace your pad temporarily with Tissue pad?
      Smh...

      Delete
    5. Bia steffy wetin com do d toaster?
      He is such a nice guy, hope u still friends with him.

      Delete
    6. GBG, what did u say? Tissue? Jesu!!! Do u know how irritation it is? Hian!!! I hail o

      Delete
    7. No she is not a dirty girl. Menstruation is nothing to be shameful about. So if she gets stained, it is not the end of the world. You are one of the reasons why they are so many myths surrounding mensrruation. You want her to kill herself because she stained herself? Or it now automatically defines her as dirty? My dear stefy there is no shame in menstruation. So dear shamer see it as a sign of a superheroe who is capable of bringing another to the world.#SmashtheShame #menstruationmatters

      Delete
    8. When such thing happened you will be confuse because na where you wan start from. I no fit forget the day I got stained with menstrual flow that day was a horrible one. Na bad thing for a girl to get stained by a menstrual flow

      Delete
    9. This is unbelievable. Am speechless

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    10. Why didn't you clean up before entering his car?

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    11. @Jasmine, what's wrong with using Tissue temporarily till she gets home?
      What's irritation?

      Delete
  32. Can't remember any since this year but there is this one that happened few years ago in school. My lovely roommate and I decided to do chop and run as usual but never knew this two guys were parasites in human form, infact we later discovered that they were even cultists sef. So we planned to always ignore them anytime they called but for where these over grown babies no gree comot teeth. So one day they called my rumy as usual but we decided to fake it that we were going through a prayer session, she put the phone on loudspeak while I was busy clapping and singing loudly in a manly voice, she on the other hand was clapping as well, she just murmured on the phone to them that my pastor is here praying with us please call later kk and hanged the call without knowing they were right outside our doorstep. Immediately she dropped the call we burst into laughter, within few minutes we heard a knock at the door, who is there? Its us Nd and Jp, we decided to wait for you ladies to complete the prayer to avoid disturbing you, come open the door quick
    Aaah amy go and open the door na , we started dragging until my rumy summoned courage and opened the door
    These semi bullies badged in and started asking of the pastor that kept them waiting
    I turned dumb infact shame no gree both of us explain ourselves, how we came out of that situation that day I can't explain.
    It really took time and strength to discharge those parasites.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lmao! Nice one!

      Delete
    2. HaaahaaahaaahaaaHaaahaaahaaahaaa!!!! Very craaaaaaaaaazy!

      Delete
    3. ....very interesting piece...Lmao!

      Delete
  33. Lol, can't think of one right now. Chei, thank God ooo

    ReplyDelete
  34. Mine should be the day I saw one guy that was crushing on me seriously like two years ago. I ran into him in a public over crowded place, see me trying to form familiarity only for the fool to just wave and continue moving. Jesus I wanted to faint. People were looking at me one kind. I had to use style and rearrange my already wide grin.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. When a crush (who may not know you are crushing and may not feel the same way) embarrasses you, sister I can relate.

      Delete
  35. Hahahahaa@that is not my real face o. Baby comedienne Emmanuela, that little girl is cray.
    Best baby skit 'Uncle can you please spell Crocodile for me'.

    Sorry about the torn skirt, you ignored the breeze that was blowing you and was enjoying it instead.
    Pele!

    ReplyDelete
  36. I fell down in church lastweek sunday in house on the rock#lol

    ReplyDelete
  37. E be like say them plenty ooh....

    I was running late for work one morning and i didnt take notice of my shoe....i just felt comfy in it only for someone to ask me if my shoe is hungry.... the sol was open...

    Few weeks ago,i was having a wig on,feeling fly i climbed bike dey go express where i can enter motor to town.. just when i was close to where i would stop my wig left me ashamed...

    Ahaaaa...last week, there is this madam in my office that does as dou she no dey shit....she talks about eating healthy n all...

    So that fateful day,i needed to use the restroom, as i just enter i noticed someone was in the 2nd toilet,i quickly used the first toilet n ran out cos the smell was something else ..only for my madam to come out from the second one...she just looked my face and was like ‘this really smells bad, n i was like yes, quite bad ’..we both laughed it off though.

    ReplyDelete
  38. Its not your real face oooo

    ReplyDelete
  39. Shakara go carry some girls miss their blessing someday.

    That was how one mistakenly dropped her money,i was even drawing her attention with HB pencil, she still no gv me face.... The money took k of my stomach infrastructure sha.

    ReplyDelete
  40. Girls b like " every excuse wer guys tell u na chyke e wan do"

    ReplyDelete
  41. Decided to hook up with my side chic some days back, dun even know what came over her that day.... Come see as she use brown powder scatter face,,,, oboy i was so embarrassed walking with her along the road cus all eyes were on her.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lmao...bad boyfriend. Did you help her?

      Delete
  42. * mean while. Biko who brought the idea of auto correct sef.

    ReplyDelete
  43. I had been constipated for a long time and my flatulence were unpredictable. On that fateful night, my boyfriend decided to take me from the back and we had anal sex. I kept farting throughout, but it would not stop. When he finally did and exited, his manhood was full of faeces. I was embarrassed for him, but I hope that will deter him from asking for it, in the future. He rushed me to the bathroom, a sight of relief as i did my number 2 with so much ease. We took a bath, thereafter and shared some cuddles to bed.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Spirit of the most High God!!!
      Aunty, I fear you and your BF. 2moro,someone will Suck that preek? Kai

      Delete
    2. honestly me too i dont know what to say ..i am just laughing...aha

      Delete
    3. @Bitchplis, see as my mouth just open!!

      Delete
    4. What kind of horrible disgusting story is this? And whilst eating dinner too. I've just lost my apetite. For heavens sake!

      Delete
    5. Please have the decency to clean up before doing something like that in future

      Delete
    6. Chaii let me not jst judge and seal my mouth

      Delete
    7. Mogbe!!!!who is ya moda?

      Delete
  44. I had been constipated for a long time and my flatulence were unpredictable. On that fateful night, my boyfriend decided to take me from the back and we had anal sex. I kept farting throughout, but it would not stop. When he finally did and exited, his manhood was full of faeces. I was embarrassed for him, but I hope that will deter him from asking for it, in the future. He rushed me to the bathroom, a sight of relief as i did my number 2 with so much ease. We took a bath, thereafter and shared some cuddles to bed.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. omg you are so disgusting, anal? same way the faeses came out now thats how that area will be leaking if you dont stop it now. gezzz

      Delete
    2. If asses leaked because of anal then homosexuality would've stopped

      Delete
  45. Am a new bee here, oya make Una welcome me, my embarrassing moment was yesterday, I follow mumcy go super market, as we reach there, I come see two Fine guys were d buy something, I just trip dey look dem, all of a sudden my mummy just exclaim uhhmmm, na who mess for here, na so d two guys shift their attention come our side oh, my mama come look me say, miracle na u mess, I say mummy no be me, she say na me, say na so my mess d smell, I wan die, and no be me ohh, d guys come dey laugh me, I vex for my mama ehn, na later d sales boy were dey supermarket say na toilet dey smell, I be wan kill d guy, why I'm no talk am for were those Fine uncles dey, Chai, E pain me

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Welcome miracle... U talk dis one oooo. Hahahaha!!!!

      Delete
    2. Hahahahaha... mama miracle no get chill o

      Delete
    3. Ooooooboy!!!! Just when I thought I've heard it all! Haaahaaahaaahaaa!!! Welcome Miracle Edor, I'm already enjoying you sef!

      Delete
    4. I don laff wake up my pikin. Miracle welcome o.

      Delete
    5. Hahahahah Hahaha hahahahah I almost passed out where I was laughing this is toooo funny

      Delete
    6. Buhahahhahaha ur mum got no chill at all

      Delete
  46. Tot This client of mine was hitting on MI, each time he steals glances at MI I Jst felt he rly liked mi. I was so happy when he asked me out for lunch one faithful day, on getting der he Jst went on his bended kneels begging me for a position in my company dat he could only talk to MI coz I looked calm n easy to talk to....choi!! So y dos glances Na..felt so embarrassed coz I paid for my drink as well

    ReplyDelete
  47. Ehmm... my embarrasing moments are kinda limited sha.
    No torn skirts or clothes....i always cross-check my outfit.
    Shoes problem no...i always carry extra as well.
    Falling down... i would jump up so fast, you would think you hallucinated.
    My most embarassing moment happened within family circles.
    It would be very very long oh....so skip if you can't.

    So you see, mine has to do with "dreams"...very spiritual person i am
    Normally, i shut down at night with some yanni, enya and sometimes kenny G after night prayers.
    So this night eh, family prayers have ended.
    Instead of sleeping, i went off to watch E!....that time Dr.90210 was the truth. So i was on the couch, dozing and waiting. They were showing hollywood celebs and their net-worths and spendings. In one of them, a celeb was showing the house of her cat and the silly spendings on the cat. I was just there dozing,hating and calculating the amount in naira and how many plots of land it will buy. Soon, i slept,i managed to wake again to see retro photos of a celeb with red red lipstick on.
    I decided to drag my sleeping ass inside and skip the programme for the next day.

    Then i just slept off.....
    In dreamland, i was cat-walking to our fence, don't even know what i wanted to do there. Next thing, i saw this very fat cat with red red lipstick on the fence, it saw me, smiled and said "Aunty you wan fetch watar(water)". My eyes bulged, my mouth opened and out came a horrrendous scream. Everyone ran from different direction of the house to wake me. My parents were like What happened? what happened? my mum with the extra drama fearing "attack" was already casting and binding everything. So what exactly happened now? i just kept mute. How person wan explain that kind dream. I just held my chest, and kept panting like some race-exhausted rat. Everyone sha left me alone. Later in the morning, my siblings got to know about the famous dream. Well, disappointed was an understatement. When it finally landed my Mama'ears, she gave the typical Naija mother's reply.............

    Why won't your spiritual life be zero percent when you are always pressing phone?


    2nd dream:
    I just wrapped up reading for a test that promised heartbreak and had major plans to "jump into conclusion" in my bed(if you remember the meme of that obese woman diving), when my sister showed me this meme about an anget testing to see if the trumpet was blowing....bla bla bla. I gave her a patronising smile of thanks, thinking about sleep and i dived.....i literally dived into bed.

    And it happened!
    I was in class, close to evening, then i heard a distant explosion, followed by something that sounded like someone was trying to blow a trumpet. I ran out. Towards the teaching hospital....wetin i dey find there, i no know. The sky also had shapes of hairy people with white apparels.

    As i was running, one hand went to my head in an attempt to pull out my weave, the other hand went to clean the lipstick....if na that one go prevent me from rapturing...mbanu, had to go. So i kept running alongside so many others. And i woke up, panting heavily.

    In the morning, i arranged chair, and instructed my younger sis to sit and hear my "Endtime Epic Revelation". After relaying my story,the babe just gave me a serious side eye, looked at my head like tiny pigs were falling out and showed me the meme that inspired everythng,then hissed and walked out.

    Oh well,now if i absorb a new info while i'm trying to sleep...i force myself to analyse it before i crash or i beg the heavens to be nice to me while i take on the role in my dreams.
    THE END!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lmaooooooo.
      Uv killed me with laughter abeg, im coughing seriously

      Delete
    2. You're so freakih annoying. What's with the long ass story?

      ITK

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    3. This is too funny!

      Delete
  48. Bia Poster, why crying because your skirt got torn?
    Next time, turn the torn part to the side and look for obioma.

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  49. Mine happened last week. Met bae's parents for the first time, we all went for Benny Hinn's service, I wore a white and blue skirt with no panties underneath. I stood up to go use the ladies just when i decided to pee the amount of blood rushing. noticed I had stained my self front and back with blood. I boldly went back inside the church cause there was no excuse to miss Benny Hinn...I used my bf jacket to cover up when i got inside.... IT WAS SOOO Embarrassing...

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  50. Mine happened some weeks ago. So I was going to make my hair and my hubby gave me money to make my hair in a salon close to my house. Mbanu! If I hear, the salons close to my house are quite expensive, so I carried myself to the hood.
    I got there and the salon wasn't open, so I was cat walking to buy airtime and call the number written on the door of the shop. I stepped on the plank and it gave way, na so I fall inside big dirty gutter wey dey smell. Choii, I couldn't even get up, 2 guys had to hold me to get up. My trouser even tore small, the thing pain me ehn and I have a scar on my leg now. Who send me?
    Anyway I washed my leg very well, made my hair and went back home. Since then I dare not go outside my area to make hair.

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  51. Loooooooool mine happened some few hours ago. This guy seriously crushing on me came over to my shop this afternoon, meanwhile my sandals cut. He was still helping me look for a shoe maker to help me mend it when my trousers tore as I bent down to sweep. FYI it is chinos and it's a soft material. And I don't put on panties. I wanted to die. The guy still offered to take me home to change the trousers. Sweet guy *covers face*

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  52. Mine isn't recent but anytime I think about it, I still cringe.
    Before we moved to our own house, the house we lived in had little mice and big rats. You'd hear them at night but on this day, they decided to be bold.
    My sister and I had friends visit - my boyfriend and a toaster of hers. Everything was going smoothly o when I saw a little mouse poke his head from underneath a chair. I looked at my sister, she looked right back at me. It was telepathic, I tell you. We willed the mouse to stay in place. Like it heard us, it went back. We heaved sighs of relief and continued with our conversation. Not too long after, whether it was the same mouse I don't know, it came out, looked at us and then swiftly ran towards a wall socket. I had been telling my brother to stuff the mouse hole for ages, but na story everyday. Jerry's door in Tom and Jerry is real, yo. We had one like that but without the door, just the hole. The guys didn't notice, just sis and I. We ignored.
    After some minutes, the mouse ran back. I was already sweating. My sister looked like she was suffocating but the guys didn't seem to notice. We quickly made jokes so the guys wouldn't observe the ongoing drama.
    We didn't see the mouse for like 20 mins and had forgotten all about it when this mouse came out with a sibling/friend. I still don't know which of them ran straight for the door hole but the other took its time. It proceeded slowly, walked a little, paused to nibble on something right in front of us, walked a bit, then ran swiftly into the hole.
    Mehn, there was no sound in the room. I glanced at my boyfriend, he was silent. The other guy looked mortified, lol. I shame for my sister. She couldn't even talk. Then the guy spoke up and said, "(sis' name), na so them get mind?" My boyfriend burst laugh. I gave him one look ehn and he immediately shut up.
    My sis just quiet like person wey dem baff cold water.

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  53. I went to open account in skye Bank asokoro one fateful day o...trying to hep my brothers marketer friend's ministry. I park car front of gt bank just beside d skye Bank as no space to park for dia domot.. my dear! Na flat slippers I wear dey drive since oh! Only for me to climb dis my 6 inches suede blue high heel shoe just so I fit hep my height ministry. I begin catwalk o, enter d bank and was told dat marketer was transferred to another branch.hian! After dis trek of life untop high heel on interlock with holes in between..ladies una knw now say dat work no easy. Only for me to get to d gate to exit..abeg make una come see tumble not even fall.chai! Both d security men o,atm customers wey full like ant o, passerby's and admirers jaw nearly fall comot from dia face as if na cinema dem dey 4 shock!. I try to quickly stand, no way oh ! Dat was how gt bank security man wey see me dey park car rush cum help me to my car.. my ankle swell like 4 mths pregnancy and was treated for over 3 weeks.. sinceeeee dat day ehhh!! Wen I see heels on d left , my dia, na eyes right tins o..

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    Replies
    1. Hahahah! I can relate. Had this experience at the airport once. I was 13yrs (I started wearing heels,forming classy teenager). I just tumbled down the stairs at the airport. Everybody just dey pity me. Small pikin wey wan do shakara. See shame.

      Delete
    2. Kikikikiki.cheiiii @tumble.you funny die ...I understand your pain.

      Delete
  54. So interesting,mine was last sunday,i wore a very beautiful sky blue gown,all eyes was on me,i didn't know that my seat was stained with Ribena by a child,so during offectory,i stood up to the alter feeling fly,only for some one at by back to tap me and told me that something like period stained my ass,waoh,i refused to feel embarrassed hence it wasn't my period though I felt it shaaa

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  55. Mine was in may and at Ph airport. I was wearing leggings without pant under and a body hugging top dat covers to d bum but if I bend d top will shift. Dats is how I came from d cap wit my Hermes shades on dragging LV bag and cat walking into departure feeling fly. U know dat kind of feelings of all eyes on me. Then I notice a particular guy trying to get my attention as I walk into departure to check in I didn't ansa d guy. After checking in I was told to go n identify my luggage n dat was how d guy walked up to me n said madam I have bin trying to get ur attention n I asked him how I can help him by removing my shades. Na so d guy say madam ur leggings is torn I can see ur butt wen u walk cos ur top shift up wen u walk. Guys!!!! I died a million times. My brain went blank n I was confuse. My legs went numb I couldn't cat walk again I had to summon courage go identify my luggage n use d opportunity to remove one of my jeans from my bag so dat I can go into d ladies to go n change. After identifying my luggage I asked one of d women there to check my back side to confirm it n she said yes. I wan die for shame. I told her to escort me to d toilet let me see someone to talk to cos I might fall walking alone cos I was so shy. She accompanied and I just refused d torn leggings n dump it in d trash n from d toilet I just checked in n went to seat down straight up. Pending wen my flight will be announced.

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  56. My embarrassing moments many sha. I no fit count how many times I don fall for ground all in the name of heels

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  57. Mine was when I mistakenly transferred 50k instead of 5k to some one's Acc, I was so angry and I hurried to the bank to complain on getting there I saw long ATM queue infront of the bank I majestically walked to the bank door and was pulling it wt force


    Everybody at the queue started looking at me, immediately I sensed something wasn't right, I come check my fone na Saturday



    Chai I shame tire, I ran out if the place

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lol... I can relate to that

      Delete
  58. @pink shell nne dude is just there oooh. I don't know why I can't stand him, he is such a sweet soul but I can't stand him being with me or touching me sef. We have agreed to be friends tho I know he want more but I love someone one else. And can't stop loving Lee boo

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  59. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  60. I recall toasting this fine girl for months, she disappeared for about 10 months, when next I saw her she was looking fresh with larger boobs, I like boobs no be small so I intensified my toasting , finally she agreed and I invited her to my crib , we decided to take a shower , while under the running shower I started sucking the mammary glads , not knowing she just delivered and was still breast feeding ... na so breast milk full my mouth ... the stupid thing taste like bad palm wine ... I almost died of shame and anger . The idiot just laughed at me.

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  61. Mine happened when I travelled to the states for the first time for training. They usually sent around the menus in the morning for us to select lunch. On the first day I took a look at the menu but didn't recognize anything except for bread with lettuce, bacon and tomatoes. For desert I just picked any name there. When we assembled for lunch, the waitress brought a covered plate and asked who ordered so and so? We were about 20 and nobody answered. I totally did notnunderstand the name she mentioned. She came to me and I said no that's not mine. Na so she moved round and round until I come call am ask what is this food called again as only me never get my desert. As she come explain I realized it was my order. See laughter. Shame wan kill me that day na.

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  62. One time a few years ago, something like this happened to me. In Port Harcourt too. I wore a tight black skirt and felt that the pants I had would reveal lines through the skirt material and so, I went pantless. I alighted from a bus, a heavy bag on my back (I was to travel out of PH after work that day). I noticed that two guys came from behind me at separate times to get a good look of my face. I thought it was admiration. Lo and behold, after feeling really good with myself while walking down to work, one woman called my attention with so much embarrassment.................I entered one hairdressing salon straight away, brought out a trouser........I remembered that day with mortification for a loooong time.

    ReplyDelete

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