Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narratives...

Round headlong head,same shit different toilet!

NARRATIVE NUMBER ONE
BETWEEN THE DEVIL AND THE DEEP BLUE SEA

Good day Stella,
I'm an ardent reader of your blog but I have never commented. I'm a 27year old girl, a pharmacist, single, been working for 3years now, earning a reasonable income(at least my basic needs are covered).

Let me start from where my relationship became really serious before BV’s would do a body count check on me. I schooled in the South-South region of Nigeria, precisely the home of runs girls. Met a guy in 2010 ,we dated till 2014…we broke up  in 2014 based on “irreconcilable differences”(I love that word…*grins*)no case of infidelity, or i being materialistic, or bad sex…I guess we were always at loggerheads, forgetting I was dealing with an Ibo man, I tend to get a little obstinate.

Between 2014-2015, we reconciled more times than I can count. He’s really a good friend, a substitute father, an adopted elder brother and my Akwa-Ibom spirit just made sex out of this world. When the “come-backs” were becoming recurrent I had to end it finally because it felt like he was taking my affections for granted. One reason I also ended it was because I noticed I was confused as regards his generosity. 

When I was in school, he was footing the bills but when I started working, I wasn’t seeing the money again, I tried to be understanding but the materialistic side of me that has been suppressed by love just couldn’t take it especially when I hear tales of my friend’s boyfriends slapping them with money.

Then, I met this light skinned guy early 2016…'baffed’ me with attention, the communication was on point, he has a thriving business, a sleek ride *shines 32* and generous. He totally swept me off my feet, I was just happy that finally my banging body has landed me a good catch (I beg I don taya for broke guys).To avoid confusion I would name my 2010-2014 ex (long head) and the light skinned guy (round head).

Round head was cool the 1st month of our relationship  though he could go overboard with the calls. He could call like 5 times a day, at first it was unsettling but I was willing to cope with it, 2nd month I started seeing his TRUE COLORS, by the 3rd month, it became RAINBOW COLORS; I was seeing so many negative attributes at the same time, he was always suspecting my every move, the relationship got choky even the money I was getting wasn’t important anymore. Let me list some of his negative attributes.

He’s insecure, possessive, unnecessarily jealous, petty, kind of talks like a woman when he’s angry, showing little signs of domestic violence, kind of abusive and to crown it all, he has a small “weapon of mass destruction…..mass destruction ke…no destruction  sef", I get all giggly when he comes in; I just had to convert my giggles to moans. So he won’t feel bad. Even with the not so good sex, I was willing to adjust (e go hard sha) so long as he drops his bad attitude…anyways I broke up with him in May.

Long head is a monitoring spirit, whenever I get into a relationship, he would just come from nowhere and start saying the same old story. Most times, I end up going back to him but when I met Round Head I stood my grounds and gave him an emphatic NO! He was shocked to stupor but he allowed me rest.

Now Long Head is back again, saying he was committed but shy that’s why we’ve been having ups and downs and he wants to get married  to me (he’s 34).

Round head has apologized to me saying he would work on his attitude that I should give him another chance (he’s 32).

Hmmmnnn….I don’t want to go back to Round Head again even if he decides to change, the probability of him changing completely is slim, I don’t want to send chronicles of domestic violence 3years later. Then there’s the problem of the “small equipment’. 

Stella, I like big things ooo…Long Head sef, his not-so generous spirit is equally a thing to worry about, I can’t be using my money for everything. After all, the children would bear their father's name.

Madam Stella….i need your red ink; dear BV’s, I equally need your bad mouth and constructive criticism.

*HMMMM!!!


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NARRATIVE NUMBER TWO
OUTCAST BROUHAHA.

Good day Stella. 

Am a bv and seeking relationship advice from my fellow bv's and your red pen also.

I have been dating this guy for almost 4 years now. He's been waiting for me to graduate so we tie the knot. The issue is I come from a home where my parents didn't give us room to bring our friends especially opposite sex home. 

Fast forward to Nov 2015 and he's wanting to marry me since I am through with school, told my parents about him and like typical Igbo parents they went to do a background check on him. They later called me to say it won't work, reason being that his mum's mum is an OSU. 

Igbo's here can relate. 

We both love each other, and I was told not to even tell him, that I should call off the relationship. I tried all possible to plead but it fell on deaf ears especially my dad. 

Please I need advice on what to do next. Igbo's here help out with this OSU/UMEH/DIALA issue, anybody that has been in same situation and Stella's red pen. 

Thanks in anticipation.

*My dear i dont know anything about this at allll..i have heard about it though and have friends who are Osu...One thing i know about the Osu's is that they are always well educated and rich,everything they touch turns to gold.