An Igando Customary Court in Lagos on Thursday dissolved an 11 -year-old marriage between Mr Azeez Ige and his wife, Bola, over alleged sex starvation.
The court’s president, Mr Adegboyega Omilola, in his judgment, said the court was convinced that the estranged couple was tired of the union, as all efforts to reconcile them had failed.
"Since both parties consented to the dissolution of their marriage, this court has no choice than to dissolve the marriage.
"The marriage between Mr Azeez Ige and Mrs Bola Ige is hereby dissolved from today.
``Both parties are free to go their separate ways without any hindrances and molestation." Omilola ruled.
Ige, a 53-year-old civil servant, had approached the court seeking to dissolve his marriage, on the grounds that the wife had starved him of sex since 2012.
"My wife is starving me of sex, whenever I wanted to make love to her she always fights me and my body is not a stone nor stick." he said.
He also told the court that his wife was fetish, a drunk, and had once tried to strangle him, adding, ``she held my neck and wanted to kill me but God saved me.".
According to him, Bola consumes excessive alcohol and misbehaves afterwards.
The petitioner said that his wife had kept some strange materials like horns, calabash and other fetish items in his wardrobe.
He added that the woman was in the habit of leaving her matrimonial home for up to a month without permission.
``Whenever I question her she fights me. She always engages herself in a physical combat even with our son’s teachers when she goes there.
``And she always fights me with knife, cutlass but will quickly rush to the police station to report and get me arrested." he said.
Bola, a 44-year old businesswoman, however, attributed her refusal to have sex with her husband to her fear of getting pregnant.
"I denied my husband sex since 2012 because of my health condition. I gave birth to our only 10-year-old son through operation and I don't want to experience such again.''
Bola accused the husband of beating her frequently, a situation which made her to severally move out of their matrimonial home, to save her life.
NAN
*.I totally understand where this woman is coming from because i know that CS is not easy for some,i went thru the pains and i know what it did to me,it can destroy one's mindset if one does not get the necessary love and attention.
What a pity.
Life first abeg.
ReplyDeleteVery selfish and useless man.
Story story indeed, marriage don tire both of them.
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You are the unreasonable one here, 2012?
DeleteSince 2012? Haba, pity him na.
DeleteShe can use birth control and also only have sex with him when shes safe. So isnt she selfish too thinking of only herself?
Stella supporting women since 1900
DeleteTwo of them are the cause.
There is definitely more to the story than this.. the woman must have been frustrated. I am tried of men cheating ways sef, smh.. hubby just came back from a journey and i saw a sex enhancement drug he bought to use at home mouths back in his bag. Why travel with it. Besides for a little while he has been asking for anal sex, omg. I can't deal. 5 years three kids all cs. Smh. I go luck up like this woman oh.
DeleteHmmmm,its a pity though! Sometimes I wish this pregnancy thing is rotated btw couples, madam carry belle for 1st born,oga carry for 2nd born. Crazy thought.
ReplyDeleteReally cos they (men) have no idea what it's like. Everything about you changes.
DeleteI don't think the issue here is CS, their only child is 10 years old but the sex issue started 4 years ago. If this issue started 8 or 9 years ago then I can relate it to CS. In my opinion both parties are just tired of the marriage, maybe due to new attractions outside their home.
ReplyDeleteYou get "respeckt".
DeleteCan the woman not go on the pill or consult a doctor for advise?
DeleteHow can you stop having sex with your husband out of fear of getting pregnant?? She is 44 and not a child.
Sounds ridiculous to me though but oh well, I hope they have peace now.
Gbam.
DeleteYou get sense.
DeleteYou knacked it well
DeleteCan't the man get the snip? Must the woman do everything? If he's the one that wants sex and she's scared of getting pregnant, then he should do something from his side to ensure that she doesn't get pregnant. Simple! Besides, it sounds like he's physically anusive towards her and she retaliates sometimes, other times she flees grin the house for her life but the man is trying to twist it around and say she beats him, strangled him and also leaves the house for long periods of time. Yeah right!
DeleteSex, marriage and divorce is really trending theses days.
ReplyDeleteWhat a pity both partners ve tried but dat doesn't mean the woman will not perform her duty as awife
ReplyDeleteDivorce!Divorce!!Divorce!!!dis word scares me...what happened to sorting out ur differences and moving on?
ReplyDeleteSo other things he mentioned are not valid eh Stella? And what happened to contraceptives?
ReplyDeleteThank you my brother. What happened to contraceptives. She has no excuse. Maybe she is already tired of the man and the marriage she just looking for a way out
DeleteDon't mind stella. Complete feminist
DeleteWhat happened to him providing the contraception? If you believe his story then you can believe anything. How can your wife beat you regularly and almost strangle you to death at one point but still, you want to make love to her, Really? The wife's story sounds more like it. Nobody would want to have more children for an abusive husband.
DeleteGiving birth is not easy at all. Weda CS or normal. Infact its d hardest thing i hav ever done in my life.
ReplyDeleteSo?
DeleteSoda. Roger, when you experience childbearing, let's know before you open your patako anyhow here
DeleteI've always said it that Naija women have very thick skin, the poor woman is still traumatized by her experience with child birth and is scared stiff of going through the same thing again.. I guess nobody counselled her or even helped her during that phase... Na wa!
ReplyDeleteReally.... But some women in Europe prefer it to natural birth.. Anyways childbirth to me wasn't painful at all... By he's grace it felt like periods pain when I had my two kids. Though I was giving some gas and air (Entonox) to relieve the minor pains.
ReplyDeleteI had two CS within 14 months interval. And if not for the economy I'm ready for more
DeleteWhy didn't you address the part of her bn fetish according to the court?The woman is tired of the marriage. Nothing like pity here.
ReplyDeleteWhich one is scared of getting pregnant.Are they illiterates? Never heard of family planning?
So Stella coz of fear of pregnancy the husband should be starved of sex? WWhatever happened to tying the womb. thought you were transparent?
ReplyDeleteI guess not.
What happened to vasectomy?
DeleteY do all these weird couple fights end up at igando customary court.
ReplyDeleteSearch me! Just like Rob the beggy beggy with his made in Ejigbo wedding.. Same axis.
DeleteWe will never know the truth. Both are tellig tales that helps their agenda.
ReplyDeleteOk honestly, CS Is not that horrible cos I've experienced it. She's using it as an excuse. women go through it multiple times and come out great. They both sound educated to me and from what we have read, the woman has serious issues. getting drunk and being fetish? Sex does not always lead to pregnancy if planned out. She should park well, abeg! They are both tired of the marriage. Period.
ReplyDeleteI don't know why yaraba people can't stay in their marriages!...
ReplyDeleteJust negodu excuse for divorce!...
Tueh!...
Pls it's yoruba bike o nnem
DeleteBiko cs isn't her issue. Her child is already 10yrs old. She started denying the husband sex 4yrs ago. So the son was 6yrs already. If she didn't want another child, shouldn't she be on contraceptive?? So cs wasn't her issue.. She was either cheating on the husband and didn't want to sleep with him again and wants out....
ReplyDeleteStella the feminists. Osheey🙌🙌
Always looking for excuse for women. Cs she did 10yrs ago, it's not that it's affecting her. It didn't since she gave birth but 6yrs after her child was born. Contraceptive has finished madam Stella
There are other underlying issues and d CS is just one of them.
ReplyDeleteThe Primary purpose of Marriage is Companionship and I mean u do know there are contraceptives u can take to prevent pregnancies from happening.
I just dont believe this woman.
The O people and sex and divorce non stop. Na waah ooo
ReplyDeleteI don't understand😔. So coz of fear of cs, she stopped having sex with her hubby? That's a big lie. Whatever happened to family planning. Madam should tell the truth, she is tired of the marriage. And the hubby might be telling the truth about the fetish part, she probably wants the man dead. Good thing the judge separated them.
ReplyDeleteThey were both tired of the marriage. No need to stay pretend and end up killing each other.
ReplyDeleteThe woman moved out. She was tired of the marriage. The husband says shes fetish. To starve a man of sex for 4 years? The issue isn't CS. 10 years ago surgery?I guess it was good they both went their ways. With only one child between them.Both can start their lives over again.If you dont like one marriage ,you can get another marriage. No be by force.
ReplyDeleteStella is funny sha. When some women will intentionality opt for CS to have their kids
ReplyDeleteYesooo. Got no time to pushooo cos i dnt want to complain of leaking punani. Cs all the way. Egwu onye okara obi
Deleteresuming sex after a painful delivery or CS is not easy. it is well, divorce evrywhere, God help us. *siping nestle milo n nido*
ReplyDeletea.k.a EDWIN CHINEDU AZUBUKO said...
ReplyDelete.
The hospital that conceive her previous kid must have done an unsatisfying work to make her loose interest in having kids again though..... Aint easy to be a woman though....
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***CURRENTLY IN JUPITER***
So you should starve him for four years, aahh that is a long period nau, even of you went through hell one year is enough for you to get your body back and take precautions against getting pregnant not starving your husband
ReplyDeleteWho said dat if u Giv birth naturally ur punani slacks...PURE LIE!! It depends on ur body leave dat tin...Some has slacked punani self b4 givin birth..so it depends..
ReplyDeleteI don't feel love in this marriage expecially from the woman's side, some women go through cs more 3-4 times and still be happy in their marriage, the man should please free her, and get married to another woman.
ReplyDeleteLame and empty excuse.
ReplyDeleteWhat happens to f-planning and contraceptives? Did they ban it from our continent?
The issue of fettish was never talked about by the judge. Any little issue in Yoruba people's marriages...DIVORCE.
YOU guys need 3 days fasting and prayer.
So the useless man cannot use a condom? If men were allowed to give birth to kids too, I wonder if they would have been going on and on about sex. Nonesense!
ReplyDeleteThe headline is misleading. The court didn't dissolve the marriage because the lady denied her husband sex. The marriage was dissolved because both parties consented to the dissolution. The reason(s) for their decision is immaterial at this point since the decision is "unanimous". Trust me, no court will dissolve any marriage where one party refuses to give consent unless where it can be proved that the the party refusing to give consent is doing so with prejudice or malice.
ReplyDelete
Courts always encourage reconciliation, even in very bad cases. That's why in the dissolution of marriage under the Act, even when a petition for divorce is granted, the court grants a divorce nisi first then waits for 6 months before granting divorce absolute, in hopes that both parties may reconcile within the 6 month period.
In this case, it appears both parties are tired and want out. I'm sure they've separated for some time.
Madam Stella, abeg make we hear word. The child in question was already ten years and she stopped sleeping with the man 4 years ago. CS after ten years is no excuse to deny one's spouse of sex. Whatever happened to family planning? The man on his own part lied about the woman trying to strangle him and fighting him with weapons or probably blew the true situation out of proportion. Both were tired of the marriage and it was a good thing they parted ways.
ReplyDelete