culled from facebook.
Monday, May 30, 2016
66 comments:
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Ok
ReplyDeleteWow I could literally feel the structure of my brain changing.
ReplyDeleteNice
ReplyDeleteLittle wonder at fact two and three.
ReplyDeleteLittle wonder. *nods head*
#WhiteDiamondOut
So you tryna let us know that you're wear glasses and therefore have a high iq and are resistant to peer pressure? Huh?
DeleteYou think you are...oh....wow...lol.
DeleteDear, I have a first class degree, university research grant from papers I wrote...I don't want to appear as tooting my own horn so I'll stop there. Guess what? my sight is perfect and I sometimes worry about what my parents say about me. So dear, go figure.
Arrogant anonymous 14:01. Having a first class does not connote intelligence and getting research grant does not depict a higher IQ. There's a difference between having a retentive memory and being intelligent
DeleteYou might have a spongy retentive memory to soak up what you read and pour it during your exam to pass. That does not mean you are intelligent. if they put you (Mr. First class) and an intelligent (Third Class) in a room with puzzles. Your sorry ass will be surprised how the intelligent one will leave the room before you do. That is to say, a third class with higher IQ will be a asset to a company (providing solutions at gridlock situations) while a first class like you will be clueless and continue to brag endlessly that:
"You think you are...oh....wow...lol.
Dear, I have a first class degree, university research grant from papers I wrote...I don't want to appear as tooting my own horn so I'll stop there."
If you want to toot your horn nko? As a matter of fact intelligent people don't even know they are intelligent until people start praising them for their rich IQ.
There's a difference between being natured/Graced (intelligent) and being nurtured/lucky (having first class after endless candle night reading and cramming)
You need to research more on "intelligent people " and know that you don't belong to that group. Shalom!
Choi. Asoge haf vex. Bawo ni?
DeleteAsoge you day vex oh, Hian!
Delete@xhirted. Sis I dey fine oo. Don't mind the arrogant masquerade joor. Was so pissed with " I don't want to toot my horn"
DeleteChia, Na wa. I have always been a top student and have first class (I was studious sha) and I am a myopia. And higher IQ and myopia is a known fact
DeleteDis is wisdom talking@Asoge.I have not heard someone make soo much sense on dis blog in a long while.Thank you.
DeleteYes I agree with white Diamond, her comments are highly intelligent.
DeleteXP, I follow you shout choi o!
DeleteChoiii!
Asoge darling, I didn't know you could spit fire like this o...dayummm!
But then, you've said it all. I wouldn't have put it any better.
Next time, just free this kind of people though. Not worth it.
*fist bump* ;D
#WhiteDiamondOut
@white diamond... thanks joor. I was not too happy with his arrogance
Delete@omoi ozovehe... I am sorry joor. I hate people who think they are higher than other people. I believe true nobility lies not in showcasing superiority it lies in humility
Delete@anonymoys 16:06... thank you sir/ma'am
These*
Delete#WhiteDiamondOut
Asoge, you are intelligent!
DeleteAnon 16:01, Ndi first class,you are a myopia?? Apparently, you still need to go back and study some more.
DeleteAsoge Darling,u nailed it!
DeleteI couldn't have said it any better!
@ Whitey,sup Baby?
I knew u weren't going to respond to the uncouth fellow.#PrincessThings #Class!
See how she exposed her insecurity😂
When you have all the Zero and First Class Degrees In The World But Lack Character,Confidence and Grace. SMH
White Diamond...you are officially close to a positive rubble rouser. Chineke meee. So tey Kemi vex. Person wey no dey talk. Ohhh k. More intelligent comments jare, I love reading your self explanatory comments.
DeleteDear Asoge...as a 5'3 woman, I always feel the same way you're feeling now when I see women who 6'0 and above, unnecessarily pained.
DeleteMy dear anon with a first class,you have a high I.Q.Whether you choose to be humble about it or superior doesn't take away from the fact that you have a high I.Q.if girls can believe they are so beautiful they deserve to be their miss whatever country,why shouldn't you toot your own horn?People come here boasting about all kinds of possessions,what's the diff?
DeleteTGW, you know this. I'm fine o. Trust you're doing good too. :D
DeleteLol, XP, na comment I just make o, I no rouse anything...hehehe!
Thanks, mami. Will do.
#WhiteDiamondOut
Asoge, e pain you o....Take it easy dear, life ain't that difficult. You can go back to school and try to make a first class okay? Good girl. Mydear first class anonymous, keep soaring.
DeleteMy sight is very perfect too...go figure!
Chai d last one. Them plenty here
ReplyDeleteSome BVs here are negaholics.
ReplyDeleteSome BVs here are negaholics.
ReplyDeleteYes oo. Myopia and Intelligence. In my Grandma's voice *umuaka ónò na ndo fu onwa.
ReplyDeleteThe Fox does not lose sleep over the opinion of the sheep.
Gbagaam!
Learned women and drinking...hmmmmmm. Biko more books for me. Someone deliver me from Papillon Sparkling Blush Red Wine. Aarrrghh.Where is that my chilled bottle?
Self confidence...the best quality to have. All ghost bvs make una get ID and repent.
I like and believe that November post.
ReplyDeleteNegaholics full this blog oh.
ReplyDeleteHalf of Bvs are Negaholics.
DeleteNow I know.
ReplyDeleteSelf confidence is the most attractive quality a person can have. #Word
ReplyDeleteNovember babies bn jolly good fellows?
No wonder! My first daughter and a friend of mine. You can hardly catch them sad. Even if it happens,they snap out of it quickly.
LOL @ go where u are appreciated and not where u are tolerated. Hahahahaha
If someone doesn't want u,take a walk. And don't be bitter about it.
That arguing over text is soo true. Lacks d seriousness or intensity of things at hand.
And sometimes too,an unserious LOL or Taaaaah gets blown out of proportion too.And u get like "u are LOLing right? It's funny to u?
And u start explaining and apologising. Hahaha
It's just soo emotional draining!
@ Those wearing glasses having high IQ is soo true. Hahahahhahaha
I remember when I was in The Juniorate. I was in SS1. And some of my classmates,about 3 or so wore glAsses from our Junior days.But suddenly in that our SS2 first term,like 7 or 8 more girls just started wearing medicated glasses before my very before.
Ha!we were just 20 in a class. So u can imagine where more dan half of the class was wearing glasses. And their glasses had very beautiful frames. Very beautiful. I admired them. And that was how far it went. Till "something" "told" me those glasses made them see and read better. 😂😂😂
And that was when I decided I was going to get mine. And by then 3 more girls had gotten their own glasses. So I hatched a plan. How to convince my Dad to get me my own glasses. U see? My dad wore medicated glasses and isn't too keen on them. So I went ahead to hatch an infallible plan that would make him get me my very own good-rimmed glasses.
We had come home from hols and as I sat in the sitting room reading and peering,my dad noticed and asked me if I was ok. I kinda frowned and told him I couldn't see properly😂
He asked me what the problem was and I told him I didn't quite know dat it started in school😂
That night as we ate dinner,he made sure I had plenty of Yeast in my food. He said it was for good eye sight. I went along telling myself I hope dis isn't all I'd get.
Luck was on my side when he called me one day to read out stuff for him and I squinted and frowned via the Newspaper article. Hahahhaha
He was visibly worried this time around and asked me what the problem was and asked if I was sitting close to the TV which he always warned us against. I said " No Daddy! I haven't bn sitting near the Television. It started in school. This eye problem disturbed me soo much that I almost lost my top place in class"
At that,my Dad jumped and told me to get ready,that we were going to the Hospital!
Hahahahhahahahaha
I sharply sprinted to my room and quickly got ready. All the while thinking of the beautiful gold-rimmed glass that would be mine in just. Few hours! LMAO
We set off for Niger Foundation and thoughtful the ride,I was happy and beaming with smiles. I already chose the colour of the glass "rope"
Pink! I was such in a giddy state till we got to the clinic.And as I sat in the reception, I mentally adopted a new style of walking that would go with my newest possession 😂
Everything was going just fine,till I was ushered in to see the Doctor. It was there in the Doctor's office that the Story of my Life changed.....
A Story that saw me walking away with a year supply of Yeast( And boy! Do I hate Yeast!) but completely "glassless"......
To Be Contiued.....
Hahahahahahahahahahahaha. I can't stop laughing at your scheme. Me since age 5, glasses is my companion. Astigmatism ish. I have the one for reading, one for seeing, and one for walking under the sun. Its frustrating and the day I decide to go just one day without it, I am done for. My papa no gree put any rope for my own cos e said I will start shakara and loose focus in class. And yes I hate yeast.
DeleteHahahahahahahahahahahaha. I can't stop laughing at your scheme. Me since age 5, glasses is my companion. Astigmatism ish. I have the one for reading, one for seeing, and one for walking under the sun. Its frustrating and the day I decide to go just one day without it, I am done for. My papa no gree put any rope for my own cos e said I will start shakara and loose focus in class. And yes I hate yeast.
DeleteLwkmd.. a yearly supply of yeast?? Kai, I dnt evn wnt to be you ryt now. BTW, u write soo well. Tho na epistle evrytym, but I like ds one.
DeleteTGW, pls come back and finish this story. I am always eager to read funny stories.
Delete😂 😂😂
DeleteGeez! Lmao!
I can relate to your story. Mine was powdered yeast (not even the tablet o) and that bitter chloramphenicol eyes drop that you drop a drop into your eyeballs, and wait with dread for its flow into your throat. I never understand sey eyes and throat get connection. Kai! Lolzz
People are beginning to think that I am weird,laughing out loud anytime I remember your stories.
DeleteI laughed really hard here. I did same in JSS1 till I got a pair of glasses. I later got tired of it sha
DeleteLwkmd!
DeleteServes you right, TGW!
But why you no finish am?
You dey fear epistle haters?
Lwkmd!
Abeg, dem no reach. Next time complete it, we wey wan read go read am.
But seriously, way back in college, people thought it cool to wear glasses. If only they knew.
Olori, isi gini?
Three?
So, if I want to kill you, I'll just take your glasses, and you're done for? Kikikikiki!
Finally, e no dey easy o.
#WhiteDiamondOut
Wow wow wow! I thought i wrote dis..D difference is dat i later got d glasses of my choice with black rope..D way i fooled my parents dat they had to rush me to eye clinic..D doctor checked my eyes and gave me alphabets to read..I pretended not to see dem..After series of test i was asked to choose d glass frame of my choice..We(and my mom) went back days later to pick it up..
DeleteSee flexing in class..Three of my class mates are already wearing theirs..See shakara ontop glasses wey no gree me see road..If i'm walking along d road,d ground will look as if its deep..i walk with caution..D glasses make me feel dizzy abi na dumb feeling on my nose area..I dont even see properly with it..
Sometimes i ask myself what did i put myself into just to belong?
To cut long story short,i wore it till i got tired of it in SS3,while i started using it in JSS3...I never went back to d doctor to change d classes or for checkup..My parents didnt even bother(mind u,my mom and dad wear glasses too)..
Its was dis year dat i mustered up courage and confessed to my parents dat i fooled them over 13yrs ago..My mom was shocked to d marrow cos was d one who took me to d eye doctor..My dad laughed out loud and told me something dat shocked me to a halt..He said he knew i dont have eye problem..He knew all along but played along to get me d glasses so i can rest..He knew daz why he never bothered asking my mom to take me back there for a checkup...OMG! i knelt down and apologised to my old folks..
Now i know i'm not d only one who pulled dis stunt..kikikikikiki!
Eeeya @ Olori. It's well dear.
DeleteHahahhaahhaha @ JustinA,TRIUMPHANT ZION and Whitey.
@Asoge, I think I prefer powdered yeast to the tablet one. Even though I think it's only in Onugbu soup it comes out nice. Lol
@MMW, Hahahhaahhaha so ur Dad knew and just kept quiet. Eeeya. Just to make u happy.
I am thankful I didn't get to wear the glasses afterall. I dread those lines that they say come with long-usage of glasses.
Hahhahahaahha wait o! Oil Money u too played the prank? Hahahahhahahaha
DeleteNegaholic, sounds like someone I know or rather knew. The drinking associated with women when their IQ increases is a lie.
ReplyDeleteSo went in to see the Eye Doctor and he asked the usual questions. I answered everything.
ReplyDeleteOh how I can't read, how I can't write well. How I have "eye headache" My Dad was seated beside me and encouraged me to tell him all I was going through. He asked me At a point whether I have dizzy spells and to tell the Doctor everything I was experiencing. The kindly middle-aged Doctor nodded as he listened to me and made notes. And in my mind I was like " Kimon! I made it! "
Then,the Doctor got up and they showed me this white board on the wall and said I should read out what I saw there. Hian! I felt so good with myself eh and I was like " Me read that thing?? Me agree I can read a single letter on that board?? No way Dr!
So I just meekly smiled and got ready to start reading. Firstly I squinted and squinted! 😂Then I peered and frowned and then I started reading it out aloud.Where I clearly saw Y, I called it O. Where I saw Z, I called it C and where I saw F, I called it J😂😂😂😂
The Doctor smiled and told me I 'd be fine. I glanced at my Dad and he looked like he was in pain. Hahahahaha
Then this Doctor set me up! He brought another board, this time,the letters written in Capital letters and told me to try and read it aloud.
I took my position,my dad squeezed my hand and I started a-reading. Firstly I moved my neck,changed my neck position, squinted,rubbed my eyes,smiled faintly and said S where I clearly saw I. Hahahahhahaha
The Doctor all along was telling me "go on.hyst take it easy. U are doing just fine. Just read out whatever u see. Don't try and force it.and don't squint. It doesn't matter if u get the letter wrong. Cos infact it will help me know what the problem is...."
I carried on this way til I finished and the Doctor told me " Well done"
At the Well done, I smiled and he told me to wait in the reception while he talked to my Dad. I smiled back and asked him if I could look through the glasses while they talked. And he said" oh yes" but not right away"
And some 10 minutes later, my Dad walked into the Reception. And when I jumped up to go meet him, he said " Ok,N,we can go now"
I was confused! Go ke?
What about my glasses? I mean what about my poor eye sight? I looked into my Dad's face and saw a hint of amusement, wonderment and a slight hint of "wait til we get home"
Na so I just shut up and followed him home with a year supply of Yeast and a telling off that started with " I raised u to be honest,truthful.....
Okbye!
#IMissMyDad'sSermons
#😂😂😂
#MovieTime!
😂😂😂😂😂😂
DeleteOmg!!!!! Lmao!
Plus you write beautifully dear.
Oh lord, I laughed all through epistle 1 and 2. I don't know who you are, I don't comment here so much. But thank you for making me laugh.
DeleteOhh, here is the continuation.
DeleteLol! I bet you didn't know that you needed a test before glasses could be recommended for you? Chai! Pele!
And you were busy squinting, frowning, and feeling victorious.
When children think they're smart...hehehe.
Thank God you didn't get to wear them o.
#WhiteDiamondOut
That was how when I was a med student, during out ophthalmology posting, a young boy came in wit his mum. He wz abt 6 or 7yrs old. Said he cldn't see wit one eye cos he had a fight wit his classmate in skul d previous day and d oda boy blinded him. His mum wz clearly vry distressd. Aftr d consultant askd him several questions and checkd wat wz written on his folder frm readin Snellen's chart (those letters), she tuk him 2 d man doin refraction and told d man she wz suspectin d child of malingering (first tym I heard d word). D man wore d child thoz complicated eye stuff where they drop in and remove lenses and deceived d poor boy, he ended up readin sooooo well wit d "blind" eye, hehehee. So he brot bak d result 2 d consultant who decided nt 2 tel d mum he wz pretendin cos most parents' anxiety wn't let dem believe u esp 4 somthn so serious. So she told d mum 2 d boy's hearing 2 bring him bak in a week's tym and if he hdn't startd seein wit d eye, we wld pluck it off, lol. D boy's face changed lyk film. Wsn't dere d nxt wk sha (e pain me wella) bt I'm so sure he definitely startd seein wit d blind eye "miraculously," lol.
DeleteBwahahahahahahhahah@can I look through the glasses now?
DeleteHohohoohoohohoohohohohohohoho
Ooopps...I went through dis test..i pretended not to read a damn thing...I dunno how i managed to fool d doctor at Guiness Eyes Hospital..Have forgotten his name shaa...
DeleteChai thank God i'm not d only mischievous one..
Dis story took me back memory lane...i miss my secondary school days ..
@ Anony. Glad I made u laugh. LOL
Delete@ Anon 5:17,hahhhhhhaha ur story cracks me up. LMAO @ Pluck out the eye.
@ Nwa baby m,sup Dearie m?
Hmmm....learned women!
ReplyDeleteStella u too much.These facts are the bump.
ReplyDelete@Anon 14.43. U are a big fool. What is bump here? Ewu Gambia.
DeleteHighly educated women r heavy drinkers? Yes, I know that
ReplyDeleteIt might be true in Oyibo land, but not here in Africa!
ReplyDeleteThe one about eye glasses and high iq is so true, I know because it happens to me
ReplyDeleteKai!!! @TGW see me reeling with laughter @4:59am. You should write scripts you know,your skills are inherent and flow naturally. I played this prank too but in my own case,seems I forgot myself when they brought in board with letters(big and small)i read out everything correctly!! I'm glad I never wore though,trust me even those who wear(despite their high IQ)envy those of us who don't wear(with our average IQ)LOL!! Meanwhile, on the flip-side,it seems curry leaf is the cheapest thing in d market ryt now oh. I bought 50# own, nna if u see as the woman heap the thing come bundle am,I stood in shock,i had to tell her "madam e too much na"!!
ReplyDeleteAwwww thanks very much Cynthia!
DeleteI'l give it a serious thought. Thanks once more Love!
@ Curry bn cheap. Hmmmm nne so u and I dey like that stew with curry leaf? Amazing!!!
I used it with Iced fish for my "native rice" and almost finished the rice alone😂 It was that good! And it's bn a looong while I made it. Then I made stew some two weeks or so and used it too. Curry leaf is The bomb!
Chai! I am craving it all over again. Wil use it on my new Stew recipe of tatashe,shombo,small tomatoes and plenty Carrots(all finely blended and boiled or fried like u would ur normal stew)
Can't wait!
Present twice....
ReplyDeleteIm actually answering present on this post because of TGW. Babe abi Madam u "kracked" me up big time. I think life will be so boring without a woman with a writing/speaking skill set and a huge sense of humour.
Happy I made u laugh.
DeleteLaughter and Happiness is all we really do need.
Lmao. TGW your epistles are always hilarious. You know glasses hold some kind of allure for kids. I remember in high school, all the 'cool'kids wore glasses and braces
DeleteThat makes two of us oh @The General's Wife!! I cannot cook stew without curry leaf oh!! Mba nu! Curryy leaf gives stew LIFE!! Omo this your "to do menu" is tantalizing! Wow, carrot can be blended and added to stew? Nne apart from being a good orator you arte also a chief cheff!!! LOLl
ReplyDelete