London Tatafo Season 15

Tatafo greets in Jamaican Patwah..

Wataguan mi own. Good day.

Weh yuh a do Sdkers? Yuh cool? Respect mi brethren, respect...

Na so tatafo see am today oh make una no vex. Na one Jamaican woman wey tatafo meet dey teach tatafo. See ehn, Come this side see all these correct Afro Caribbean mamas, oh lawd!! You will even see a 60 year old sexy grandma dragging man with you. You think you are hot? Come to East-Ham/Canning town etc, you will be humbled. 

It so happened that Tatafo was taken to a salon owned by one of these "Jamos".. as they are called. Tatafo's friend had been gisting tatafo about how very good this lady is with her craft of fixing all kinds of hair. Na so tatafo and friend reach the salon oh, order some nice curry oxtail with rice and peas, then gist come enter. 

Behold, tatafo and friend met the owner of this very big salon. She was very receptive and she fixed tatafo and friend up real good. Tatafo couldn't take  eyes off her for so many reasons. As tatafo stole glances at her momentarily. She looked like an older lady but very vibrant, spontaneous, but restless. Her hair? Dramatic but Off da hook. Tatafo was still starring at her beautiful light skin and well manicured nails when tatafo suddenly heard someone speak yoruba... who?? 

Na this mama Jamo speak Yoruba o.. although rusty, but tatafowas AWED... ‎ How come? 

Her gist...

Tatafo was hinted that this very enterprising middle aged woman from the Carribbean was once happily married to a Nigerian socialite in London. They were very happy together until world people separate them. Trust naija babes to chook neck to try and reap where they did not sow na.  

Anyway this ex couple have one child between them, a daughter who's in her early 20s. Tatafo also gathered that they were married for so many years, and that they actually relocated to the UK from the United States of America. 

The man's name, when pronounced all together, sounds like SALAH RAM. He's dark with bulgy eyeballs..womanizer to the core, and was once linked to that yoruba busty actress with number 11 on her face.  He also delved into politics when there was nothing to do again.

Gist has it that  he was 'chased' out of America for doing something illegal, hence, landed himself in London to hide and start afresh. Soon after he entered the UK, his Jamaican wife, (who by the way shares the same first name with a pretty black American hip hop star).. had to join him in London by fire by force. 

‎

The unprecedented move of this couple to London, marked the beginning of the woes that finally crashed their marriage and "street credibility". ‎

Tatafo Was also told that they were stupendously rich, as they made their money from whatever business it was that chased them from the U.S to the U.K.  But if only this Jamo mama had known that relocating to London with her hubby would make her lose her marriage to London babes. 

Tuale...I fear who no fear una.. ***sideeyes***

Tatafo gathered that there was never a day that this couple had peace. London Police was always called to settle fight between them. Accusations of infidelity,  mostly on the part of Mr husband caused them to have recurring altercation.  

It was either mama Jamo was threatening her hubby's mistress with a knife, or she was locking her husband in the basement to deal with him. And because she is non Nigerian, any lady that came around them was a suspect. If you gather big breasts or backyard she go say you dey follow her husband.. so because she didn't want to be left out, she learned to speak a bit of her husband's language..

Then the unthinkable happened to them in London again.... 

Mr R got into trouble and became broke. Money come finish as naija babes don suck the man dry finish. He started to depend on his wife who still had her salon as the only legal business running But..... mama Jamo don lose interest. There was Love between them because she caught many of her Nigerian close friends romancing her husband and she couldn't forgive him. But she didn't leave without a rebound... 

After her husband got into trouble with the law, mama Jamo, we gathered, sold their properties worth millions and kept the money, and she also went ahead to collabo one of her husband's closest pals until he heard about it.  Ouch!! 

The thing come pain Mr R sotey he too come say e no do again. 

But this na do me I do you na.. Why the man vex? 

And Guess what? 

It ended in praise for Mama Jamo because she found love again in the arms of a Brit (oyinbo) who's madly in love with her now. Yes, madly in love with her. In fact he walked into her salon just before tatafo and friend took their leave. Plus her business is doing quite well and she no longer engages in street fights with side chics. She claims that she now has peace.. no wonder she looked very radiant and happy. 

On the other hand, her ex husband Mr R has been thrown back to Nigeria. Gist has it that before he was repatriated, sadly, he served a number of years behind bars for an offence he committed. This was a major set back for him, as he came out to an empty account, no house or money, wife had moved on, side chics took to their heels.. so he's now a shadow of his old bubbly self trying to hustle again. So the next time you bump into Mr R in lagos island, please be kind to him.  ‎

Let Tatafo say her own.. But was Mr R not foolish for repeating the same mistake that chased him to London from the U.S? Was mama Jamo right to have collaboed Mr R's friend because he did same to her? Was she wrong to have moved on? 

Well, Tatafo and friend were told that mama Jamo left him on the grounds that she warned him to be less socially conspicuous in London, plus to stop spending anyhow, but he never listened. So who's to blame?

Tatafo will be back next time! 

Catchya 

NB: SDK you called Tatafo out last week say she owe money? In naira or pounds sterling? How do you want it? Oh oh oh oh!!

*LMAO...Tatafo this gist sweet!...