Nawah for this Chronicle!
NARRATIVE NUMBER ONE
DESPERATE TO MARRY....AND THEN IT CRASHED!!!
I have been one of your fans for a very long time and i must commend you on job well done madam..please i need advise on my private life ...i really made a very big mistake which had made me sad for a very long time now and this is my story........
In 2007 i met this guy in lagos and we started a relationship, he stays in one of the slum part of lagos with no job and a drop out of one of the polytechnic although he didnt tell me this but i found out myself and i as at the time was already a graduate and working in an advertising company with very nice salary package in lagos...
In 2008 i got an apartment myself with my money and decide to help this guy by taking him to the landlord that if the money expires he will continue to pay that he is my fiance and we are planning to marry and all the documents and key were given to me and i get him in submission.....with this i decide to start something from bottom with him and build life together..But about 3 month later this guy just abandon me he left the house to where he was staying before and refuses to pick my call i tried to ask what i did but he gave excuses i beg beg beg but hell no he left me...
Then 2009 i process to study my post gramme abroad and i travelled out to study and i moved on with my life...So in 2010 he saw my pictures abroad and he was shocked and contacted me on facebook to beg me that he was sorry that he felt im bigger than him in all areas and he is still struggling with life that was why he left me, i ignored him but in 2011 i had second thought i felt age was not on my side anymore at 30 that i should forgive him and start again with him so 2012 after my programe i relocated back to nigeria but before then i told him im an orphan my brother and sisters lives in europe so the only people i have are distant relatives...
In 2012 when i came back i had no where to live so i contacted him to help me rent an apartment cause i still got some money for that ,then he said oh people dont respect single unmarried ladies and not safe in nigeria that i can come stay with him, then from there we dont know Gods plan.....so i came to nigeria and stayed with him this is something i dont want to do cause of the sinful nature but i had no where to go...so after four month i told him i dont like living like this so he suggested maybe we should go to registry by ourselves then i move back abroad then i bring him over because he has never travelled abroad and he doesnt want to marry and live and have children in nigeria cause nigeria is so hard and that later we should marry properly....
So we went to register just two of his friends even that morning i wasnt too comfortable to do this but i had to because of my age and i dont want to embarrase him....so after this i discover this guy is so agressive when we have argument you could hear from the third house, even on the road people on the street will hold him to take it easy, so hot temper after he will apologize,its was tough for me im always very scared when hes shouting ...
he stays in face me face you apartment i was always sick i was lonely not happy he doesnt want me to have friend ,he will singing abusive songs when we have issues at home, i take care of the house his clothes he will say its not cleans...its was tough and still stayed with him through it all, i couldnt get a job in nigeria and i didnt get pregnant for him so my family abroad told him he must marry me properly that they are coming to nigeria... so in 2013 my family came to nigeria to meet his family so he came with his mum and two sisters and they ask him when he will pay my bride price and we are going to do church wedding he said later..so after i left nigeria cause he insist on me coming back here and bring him over .....
So 2014 anytime he called me from nigeria and i didnt pick his call he will start shouting on the phone saying whatever you achieve is for yourself and not me and im happy for you,imagine..... so aggresive even on phone...then i decide and told God i dont want to go back and bring this man from nigeria its too much im begnning to have high blood pressure and he started to say different things to people....he said i left him and he started pasting my pictures all over internet and telling known and unknown people how he sponsor me abroad and i got a job and dump him ..
I saw all this with my own eye i felt bad and decided to move on ...now since 2014 i stopped communicating with him and i have got peace of mind but i am Scared if i did the wrong thing or not, i really want to start my life afresh but i dont know..he has not paid my bride price and no church wedding but i went to only registry with him .really dont know how, Please i need advise from you and blog readers ..please dont paste my name..God bless you Stella.
AMEN!
Hmmmm he didnt pay dowry or marry you in Church alright but that registry wedding has to be annulled by a Judge before you can marry someone else.
I think you both used each other..you wanted to marry and have a child cos you felt time was running out and he wanted to use you to get abroad,both of you might have still ended up dumping each other after both needs have been met.
Waffy forefathers say that if you run into a marriage you will run back out...thats what happened to you.
I think after two years you can file for a divorce on grounds of abandonment by a spouse..I wish you all the best ..AND PLEASE STOP BEING SO DESPERATE.
.............................................................................................................
NARRATIVE NUMBER TWO
PLANNING A WHITE WEDDING THREE YEARS AFTER
Hi Stella
Please help me post this on your blog. I fell in love with a wonderful guy three years ago but due to some uncontrollable circumstances, we couldn't really plan a big wedding. We ended up doing a court wedding with just a few friends and family members attending. We also did our introduction and we had marriage counseling in church. Three years later, and after one kid (I got pregnant after our court wedding) we have decided to do something big. Sometimes I feel like it doesn't really make sense anymore since everyone already knows us as husband and wife and we already have a kid together. However deep down inside, my husband and I want to do something big that we can cherish for life. I have always dreamt of a big wedding and I know that I will forever regret not having a white wedding if I don't do it.
How would you guys feel if you were invited to a wedding where the couple is technically married already?
Would most Pastors be ok with officiating a union like this?
Chronicles....
ReplyDeletePoster 1
DeleteReceive sense and brighter grammar
You need to divorce him to truly move on with your life. If you do otherwise, it will hunt in your next relationship/marriage. Infact you cant even marry another while you are yet to divorce the first. So, Poster 1, please feel free to contact me at flaksarems@outlook.com to help get your marriage dissolved. Am a lawyer
DeleteP1. To move forward divorce him properly,I quite agree with stella,u both where like supply and demand,unfortunately in dis case supply did not equal to demand. Age age age is notin but number,u must first luv urself and accept who u are fist,and remove desperation fm ur life,if not d next person u meet will do same unless he truely luvs u
DeleteWho said life was fair.but only U can make urself happy.
Truth is, we all av stories to tell.
P2. Na who church wedding help. Instead of using dat mony to buy a piece of land,u want squander am in a day. Our mama and papa wey no do white wedding /pre wedding photo shoot wetin do them. Una don chop everything,even pikin don enter,u wan wear white gown,*yimu*
I just can't comprehend what poster 1 is all about...and she even studied abroad??? When the foundation is broken, what can the righteous do???
DeleteDear Poster 1,
DeleteYou story is obviously one sided. We need to hear the guy's side
Ode
DeleteSimple English you no understand
Na your foundation dey broken
Moron
arnnieys......it's not when the foundation is broken but destroyed......
Delete@ P1 pls file for divorce and move on
@P2 suit yourself
Poster 2
DeleteMark your wedding anniversary
Host people to dinner or lunch
Renew your vows and move on with your lives
Poster 2 iv done my trad n court and we have a baby already. Our white is in june and my little princess is going to wear a big ass white dress that says 'mummy and daddy had to wait for me'. If the whole world likes let them know we are married, white wedding is non-negotible.
DeletePoster 1 ur gbagaun no gree me read. Ask Jesus to fix it biko.
Chronicle on point
ReplyDeletePoster one abeg moveon
DeletePoster two mk ursef happy o. You only live once. N yes a neighbour of mine did wedding 5years and 2 kids later. Peace
Please has anyone used Bioderma PH6 maxi tone clearing milk lotion? How effective is it?
DeleteHiannnnnn!
ReplyDeleteMake I perch under emjay.
DeletePoster 1, are you sure you are educated? This your narrative can only come from a stark illiterate with very low self esteem. In fact I'm so pissed at you that I feel like seeing you physically and giving you a piece of my mind. Even your family self na wa. Spending money to come and attend a marriage with an irresponsible gold digger. E no kuku see gold dig sef. Just find a way to get yourself out of dt mumu marriage. And Learn to love yourself before others can love you.
Poster 2, must you people bring every issue here? Don't you have a church to ask them those questions? Abeg go Catholic Church go ask them when they are doing next church blessing so they can add you and your husband.
I follow you shout hiannn!!!. Poster one, I found it so difficult to read your narrative. I guess you were emotionally unstable while putting the story together. Forget about the guy for now. Get a job, do things that will make you happy, go out and make friends. You're not too old. God will bring the right person your way
DeletePoster 1 your English is a disaster!!! Not surprised you were that desperate to get married.mtscheewe
DeletePoster 2, why do you care what people say? Do you gossip about others ? I dunno if most pastors will agree sha . I think the court wedding is ok sha oo. Poster 1, you both were desperate , you bcoz of your age, him bcoz of his broke state
ReplyDeleteLet me perch here.
DeletePoster 2: who big wedding help? Why not wait till your 10th,15th or 25th anniversary to do something big. You can wear your gown and renew your vows. Even that can be done on your 5th wedding anniversary. It will make sense then.
Poster 1: I had to read your post twice before I could comprehend your write up. Odiegwu!
Wot sorta write up is dis bikonu?...
DeleteTo think it's even from a supposed graduate beats me! @poster1 like seriously u nid to go back to school besides receive sense already n quit being desperate.
P2
Who una wan impress if I may ask?
Beta hv witnesses n a portable reception n jejely save up d money 4d kids education. U guys hv started d marriage already so y d ceremony?
Poster 1, see what your desperation has caused? What have you gained other than a broke ass lying man...
ReplyDeleteThank God you are out of that abusive relationship.
You guys shld go to court and dissolve whatever you had.
Poster one y were you so desperate?? Guy just wanted to use you to go abroad. Is 30 old pls??? So y the desperation?????!!! I don't get it. Society pressures you, then you pressure yourself, what do you expect?
ReplyDeletePoster 1 I don't usually do this but my dear u r the S I unit for stupidity.CHOI! See him commanding u u must bring me u must bring me are u the reasons his ancestors said an agbaya like him shud not set his life straight? Another chronicle making someborri angry gaan
ReplyDeleteYou can do better with your comment. Since poster 1 has moved on already, there was no need calling her names
DeleteChisos!
DeletePoster 2, don't see anything wrong in that,
ReplyDeleteIf you guys are financially stable then go ahead, but if not, I'll advise you let that go.
Poster two what matters is your happiness. You want a wedding you have a wedding. Who cares what people think for fuck sakes??!! People bother themselves too much about what other people think of them
ReplyDeletePoster 1, you're so funny. Now you're 30+ and single abi separated. Instead of you to wait for God's time.
ReplyDeletePoster 2, people marry after having 5kids. Go ahead and do your wedding.
Poster 1, I forgot to add. You need to divorce him before you can remarry.
DeletePoster 2, any church will accept. It's the reception that makes the wedding big.
POSTER 1:
ReplyDeleteAnother one whose bride price was not paid, went to live with a man, the man had all the sex he ever dreamed of; in different positions and capacities. She played wife; cooked food for the man and all that . . . she did not tell us about the abortions (she isn't infertile) and what does she get; DUMPED! HEARTBREAK! DEPRESSION! AGE IS STILL CLIMBING. When will girls be wise? When will they close vagina till marriage? When will they understand that marriage does not mean "signing the registers"?
Girls, fear God with this vagina and breasts he gave you for procreation in marriage and for satisfying the man that paid bride price to your dad/guardian!
Judgmental pig. Were you the one that aborted for her?
DeleteGo and hibernate somewhere, madam.
People like her will make Heaven, while you sit here, judging. Hypocrite!
Hol' up, the lady in the first story is a graduate? Holly molly! Naija education, I hail o!
ReplyDeleteLmao
DeleteAs in eeh
The English Na die
+ went abroad for a programme. Oh well!
DeleteShe even did PG in "the abroad"
DeleteAbeg just shake ehand with me. I just tire.
DeleteI tire o
DeleteAnon... thank you
DeletePoster one you are on a long thing. Move on with your life please. The lazy dude should park well.
ReplyDeleteTwo days ago, a girl wrote in that she was raped by the man she took in. Yesterday, another one was stolen from. Today, a desperate one was swindled. Is anyone taking the statistics?
ReplyDeleteMehhnnnnn,u got me LOL,swear down!!! Nice 1;derz a rzn 4 d term 'division of labor' whilst odas study d scenario n offer their 2 cent advice;sum oda should concentrate on pattern n statistics!!!
DeleteAsin eh...tired of these kinda chronicles.
DeletePoster 1: your writeup is so hard to read and comprehend
ReplyDeleteAnd you say you're a graduate?
Well, u took the right decision
Go ahead and divorce him
Poster2; you no get problem atall
Go ahead and have your big wedding since you can afford it
A graduate with a masters outside Nigeria o...I duff my hat
DeletePoster 1 pls file for divorce, desperation doesn't lead anywhere, no one should follow I must marry syndrome, most ppl in marriage wants out, so don't rush, take ur time
ReplyDeletePoster 2 u guys re married nah, y waste money u can use for other things, do ur marriage blessing n rest pls
Poster 2: your case na moimoi shift...
ReplyDeletePoster 1: please don't go back to him, I was just scared when going through ur post was thinking you already had a child for him, thank God u took note of his dirty side on time and you've thought within u that u can't cope with such attitudes and you've done nothing wrong and you've taken a very good step. And secondly he is only concern cause you've got access travelling overseas and dats the only connection he needed from u. Plz hit on my id for my email, let's get acquitted. We are on same page
Poster 1,pls pay a lawyer to get a divorce nd move on, that guy is an asswipe nd a no no, poster2 ,do blessing of marriage
DeleteKikikikikikikikikiki.....your email?
Delete1st Poster r u ugly? Or insecure? Ur write up reeks all dat haba! Sometimes when I read al dis crap I wonder where the fuck ladies meet men like dis, jeez! Nywais brush up ur grammar abeg!
ReplyDeleteKelvin dat Edo Boi ( Stellz cousin )
P2. Pls invest ur money in ur child's life. Y do u want a party? U are already married. Go to church n ask ur pastor/priest to bless ur marriage.
ReplyDeleteP1.
DeleteDid you just say you're a graduate?
I mean a GRADUATE?
Wow!!
And you claimed you did your masters abroad?
Wow!
Wow!!
Wow!!!
I couldn't comprehend anything you just wrote , your English is a disaster, like WTF?
Now I know why that mitch has been treating you in disdain.
Why beg beg beg a man? Where is your pride as a lady?
My dear keep beg beg beg(ging) him you get?.
The guy ought to have sent you a Brighter grammar down to the country you studied, atleast.
Stella, I just developed migraine while going through this poster 1 chronicle .
It's unfair...
Poster2 you will have blessing marriage pastors will do that for you. There is nothing wrong in doing blessing of marriage, people will come. I have an aunty that did hers after eight years and three children. Is every woman's dream to have her big day but some people can't afford that, but since you and your hubby can afford a wedding now pls enjoy yourself and there is nothing wrong with that.
ReplyDeleteTo poster 1 and 2:
ReplyDeleteAnd indeed ladies.
A big wedding does not mean a "successful marriage". When you bride price is paid, in a ceremony no matter how small, you are married. Court marriage isn't it, neither is church marriage. Ladies should get this into their heads!
Jesus and his disciples were INVITED to a marriage in "Cana in Galilee" (the girl's family house), not in a synagogue. No where in the Acts or NT did we read about the apostles officiating in a marriage ceremony. Please think of yourself as a parent; when do you consider you daughter married; is it when she goes with a man to the court or to a pastor? Isn't it when you as parents accepts a man's dowry with his people etc.? Please know this and stop begin deceived. One can go to the church anytime to feast or to the register to register the marriage.
Gid bless u for ur analysis. Real marriage is when your dowry has been paid traditionally. It means that honour is being given to the next gods(parents-whom God used as your vehicle to this world) in your life after your God. If your gods(refused it-which means rejecting the union) even if you go to court, you are cohabiting and not married.legally (Nigeria's law) you are married but before God who say you should honour your parents so that your days may be long, you are not married. Also it's very important to go for court wedding but the main marriage is the dowry paid. After all no be court officials feed u, send you go school et al. Church wedding is for blessings. That blessings can occur inside the pastorate office with the pastor and some church officials(deacons/deaconesses) if you can't afford a big church wedding. RCCG (Baba Adeboye) will never join a couple unless the bride's parents have accepted her dowry. Also so many true churches that follow Bible principles and not man made doctrines. Dowry is a token of gratitude to the bride 's parent for takin care of her and grooming her properly. It's not a money exchange of buying her off her parents hand as so many belive. How much can a man pay for the expenses parents made on their daughters? None. Aside feeding, schooling, Etal what about nurturing, babysitting her with values can u pay for that? No! The Bible said he that findeth a wife findeth a good thing and obtaineth favour from God( I challenge men to think, mediate about that verse inv the bible)
DeleteThe problem of this our generation is that we've lost our values. May God help us
Musa danjuma is a big dog,so he is tired of fucking ladies, he is now fucking his fellow man in the body of a woman, importing transgender, Caro go show dt man shege banza when dt man go old nd fall ill later in life.
ReplyDeleteKikikiki, but the musa is enjoying himself now. Caro go wait old. E better make e give am snipper or otapiapia now instead of waiting for ages.chikina
DeleteAunty/oga haba.take it easy pls.
DeleteThis is not new o! Dude can switch right from adam.
DeleteGod knows i developed headache while reading the first narrative. God please save "English" from eternal damnation because most people are bent on killing "english".
ReplyDeleteWhy all this forming is English your language? Abeg park well joor.
Delete😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😅😅😅😅😅. From a graduate who also studied abroad o.hmmmmm
DeletePoster two the choice is yours, you can do a blessing marriage or you relax and enjoy your home.
ReplyDelete@poster1: you are so stupid and naive.
ReplyDelete4 someone that is well educated and well travelled acting like a child is beyond me!
Please move on with your life asap,after all ur bride price wasn't paid meaning you are not his wife.
If u like fall mugu again!
Mtcheeeeew....daft lady.
Which kind well educated???couldn't even grasp wah she was blabbing about.mschew
DeleteShe might be well travelled but well educated????? Poster 1,you have learned your lessons. Move on and pray for your own man. Age is just a number. Groom and package yourself well with the right attitude and disposition.
DeletePoster 2....i go chop jollof rice and kpomo sauce o.
Poster 1 what's then your chronicle?
ReplyDeleteYou seem to have sorted it out.
Thanks for the info.
Poster2 There is absolutely nothing wrong with that, you want to celebrate your love in front of God, it doesn't matter if you are both in your eighties, you ll still be wed in the church if you so wish.
Make yourself happy joor, use your child as Lil bride or page boy lol.
Poster 2, Goan sit down abeg you no get talk
ReplyDeletePoster 1, you mean you did your masters abroad and you still write English like this?
Poster 1,
ReplyDeleteI'm happy you ran away from the stupid guy!...can you imagine?...you even stayed with him in a face me I slap you enviroment and he is not happy!...
Kai!...
Women have suffered!...to hell with him mehn!...
You did the right thing....chill,your own man will locate you!...
Poster 2,
I don't know why yaraba people likes party!...
They will do a party with their last kobo and start begging for food the next day!...
Poster,you and your husband should use that money you want to throw away in a nonsense party and better una live and the life of your child!...
I'm sure you guys are still living in a rented apartment!yet you want to do a rubbish party!...
Mtcheeeew....
Common sense is not common afteral!...
Walahi, sometimes your comment dey pure ehn, chop nokle mehn
DeletePoster one are you sure you are educated? Because from your narrative you don't sound like one, and to think that you are exposed yet so timid and foolish. Begging a man to come live with you, in the apartment you rent with your own money I mean who does that? Is this how desperation has twisted your mind? Can't deal Abeg. Some women falling their hand since!!!
ReplyDeleteCheck ur English madam teacher...'you rent with your own money'
DeleteAnonymous English tesha sir/ma - please google historical past or present tense. Thank me later
Delete@poster2: there is nothing wrong with that!
ReplyDeletePeople do white wedding even after having grown up kids.
Enjoy jare n stop talking trash.
A friend of mine just did her white wedding last 2 wks after 2kids although they did their traditional marriage b4 having kids.
Poster one:
ReplyDeleteYou're still busy asking if you did the right thing.
* smh *
Poster two:
Of course, you can still go ahead with your white wedding.
I've seen cases where couples wedded after years of having children, some, with their children playing flower girls and pageboys, even groomsmen.
Please, do what will make you happy and stop thinking about what people will say.
Whoever doesn't want to honour your invitation should kuku stay at home.
#WhiteDiamondOut
Poster 1 just say the guy dey live for AJ city (Boundary Road). You will know them by their characters. Thank God for you. Dont be desperado again. You can go and marry someone else. Afterall it is Registry. Just tell them you were under DURESS when you enter into that partnership
ReplyDeletePoster 2... DO YOUR WHITE WEDDING AND STOP COMPLAINING
Jeez.... Let me finish this my turkey stew with rice and veg salad. Brb *licks fingers*
ReplyDeleteEhen.... Poster 1, Isi gini? I see you were clothed in foolishness. I hope you've shaken off that robe now? You foolish oh! Kai! You foolish! What would make a girl with her siblings abroad, and a foreign masters degree go and live in face me I slap you? For what? A man should upgrade you and not demote you!! Anyhoo, you sef wan marry sharply Abi? Mscheeew! Better go and annul that marriage and learn to have sense!
DeletePoster 2- most pastors will do a marriage blessing for you, not wedding. So on the invitation card, you will put "families of so and so cordially invite you to the MARRIAGE BLESSING of their children A and B".... Do you understand? And your marriage blessing can be big. Decorate church and spend money like its a wedding. You may not wear a flamboyant wedding dress. And most Pentecostals may not allow you to use veil (because veil is a covering and ur husband has already uncovered your nakedness) or they may say you should not cover ur face with the veil. Just speak to your pastor and be open about it. But if you're truly a Christian it's good you take your wedding before the altar. I've seen many couples in my church do it and some do it really really big. So it's not an issue at all.
Delete@ poster 1 u still de ask questions? U made a vry good decision .....divorce him biko Wat are u still waiting for......Poster2 u & ur hubby jst wan spend moni u ve already done d traditional & court 3years ago...just do marriage blessing
ReplyDelete@1, u are so dumb, just bcos u were 30 u decided to settle for a lazy broke ass, this is must marry syndrome will kill some women, take care of ur problem nonsense.
ReplyDelete@2,is this suppose to be a chronicle, stupid question.
He dumped u while u were stil in LArgos,Nigeria cos he was intimidated by ur crib and ur ride...Den u went "to the abroad" to study and he called begging that he abandoned u cos he felt intimidated by u in Nigeria.....
ReplyDeleteYou?
You that's now abroad.
Issorai...
Sorry.dat's where I stopped.
And dats where dis story should have ended.
God's Grace.
😂😂😂😂😂
DeleteI like you ma'am!
DeleteWhy are girls so desperate these days? Must everyone marry?
ReplyDeletePoster 1 thank God for your life.
ReplyDeletePoster 2maybe cuz I am d quite type me I will jejely invest the money in something else.but do what u like its your money after all.
Poster 2 There's really no issue there so far you have what it takes to fund the big wedding and life after the big wedding. In Nigeria for that matter where people are always looking for the next available owambe please carry on. Of late sef I have been fantasizing about my kid or kids attending my wedding a year or two after. I'm thinking registry and small traditional wedding and then later have a big church blessing of marriage with my twins or quadruplets or sextuplets or even octuplets on the bridal train. Amen.
ReplyDeletePeople should stop being desperate. See the outcome? When a man is desperate it is a very crazy situation. Whew! All the best @ poster 1.
Poster 1..odiegwu, ur write up sef. Na wa, thats y being desperate isn't cool. Annullment is ur best bet. Sorry
ReplyDeleteP1: why so much mistakes in ur write up? Anyways, file for a divorce n move on with ur life. U need to b happy as a single person first before u can b happy with someone else. I dont think u ve 'self - love' if u did, u won't ve married for any reason other than love.
ReplyDeleteP2: what u will b having is 'church blessing' n u can ve all the rasmataz dt comes with having a white wedding aii.
Came to read comments.
ReplyDeletePoster one please file for a divorce. Thank your stars he hasn't paid bride price.
ReplyDeletePoster two a big white wedding after kids sounds funny abeg. Just call it marriage blessing. Don't do the white dress. Maybe gold or ivory. Instead of the very big thing, why not invite about 50 people for a beautiful dinner after the vows? Congrats
Poster 1,I hope you learnt a lesson or 2 from what happened to you. My dear at 30 you are not supposed to be desperate for marriage. I am in my late 30's and almost getting to 40 but I am not desperate to get married. Desperation leads one to doom. Please move on and I agree with Stella on this. Poster 2,my cousin did church wedding after the wife delivered a set of twins. The most important thing is to receive blessing from God. Anyhow Una wan do am make Una do am.
ReplyDeleteMy dear poster 2,whatever makes u happy DO IT. as long as u are not hurting urself or anyone.
ReplyDeletePersonally,I'd like to attend such a wedding.
I had my 8th Wedding Anniversary a couple of days ago.
I am counting down...
Two more years before we(me esp lol) have a Fab 10th.
Have fun dear planning ur second Wedding.
Mbok
ReplyDeletePoster 1, sorry to sound brash but with your acclaimed foreign education, you still write like this? You do not sound educated at all. That's by the way. Your write up threw me off balance, I have no more words.
ReplyDeletePoster 1, if say u carry am go abroad, e for pain me bad. Receive sense in Jesus name. The guy is a gold digger
ReplyDeletePoster one I developed a headache reading this your chronicle. All the best to both posters.
ReplyDeletePoster 1- File for a divorce and forget his broke Ass. Everyone deserves to be happy. You do too..
ReplyDeletePoster 2- you are already married. Y do it again? I suggest you save your money for Kids that are yet to come.
Just my opinion though..
Hello people. Please I need some advise. Over the years I have started businesses which have never really taken off the way I would like.
ReplyDeleteI read online about people describing their businesses as "very successful" and I wonder what they do and how they do it!
I have persevered in some businesses and some I start and immediately feel im wasting my time and money. Both styles have not worked for me.
Im quite comfortable financially as my husband is ok. I dont lack the basics. Now I have capital,I want to have my own achievement which I would be proud of but I keep second guessing every idea I think of.
Also I dont have many friends to glean from cos im very family oriented and spend every spare time with my kids and husband.
I only know 1 person in my personal life who has been successful in business so im a little apprehensive.
Please help, thanks!
Poster 1,
ReplyDeleteFor someone who studied and now lives abroad your English is somehow, are you sure this story is real? Or you just want to be featured on SDK ?
Anyway, you dodged a bullet not bringing the guy abroad, it would have been more painful. Try and put yourself together, do the needful, and move on with your life. This guy just wants to use you to better his life, once he achieves this, you're history. Don't allow yourself to be used, move on.
Poster 1...you don't have respect for yourself...
ReplyDeletePoster 2..it's possible to have that white wedding... My mom and dad just did theirs but that was because dad didn't believe in church weddings and mum had to convince him...and if you know my age eh...plus the younger ones wey I get...but the wedding was awesome...so...if it's wat you want and if you have the money...no problem... Go on then...
Poster 1: Truly Powerful Women Don't Explain Why They Want Respect... They Simply Don't Engage Those Who Don't Give It To Them! There Is A Time To Be A Nice Person, And There Is A Time To Say Enough Is Enough. Poster 2: You Want To Be Happy? Stop Caring About What Other People Think.
ReplyDeleteP1: I couldn't understand your English oooo...
ReplyDeleteE be like say under this Buhari suffer suffer regime, Na court marriage sure pass o, the rest can come later joor. now na to find wife remain
ReplyDeleteHmmmmm I am tongue tied .....
ReplyDeleteHmmmmm I am tongue tied .....
ReplyDeleteStella, when will you post a chronicle sent in by a guy. Am tired of reading stories of heartbreaks women suffer from guys. Men dey show women sha.
ReplyDeletePoster 1, invest in yourself more, u will be glad you did. Like I've always said, never make a man the center of your happiness. Make money, more money, plenty money, make some more, get pregnant for a random guy or a sperm donor (anyone that won't stick around) have your baby, adopt another (of opposite sex), get a german shepherd, an Alsatian, 2 bull dogs, Rottweiler and a Yorkipoo. And you all live happily everafter. No man except the security guard and your son.
ReplyDeletePoster 2, its never too late to have the wedding of your dreams. My church member got married last month after 2 kids and a big belle.
Poster 1, go for thanksgiving , you are very lucky that it was only Registry that both of you did. If you had gone ahead to marry him properly and also have a child for him, you would have been in a very big mess. If you had sent him abroad, he would have dumped you, all he wanted was to use you as a ladder to climb to the top.Imagine, he is a broke ass nigga and doesn't want to birth any of his children here in Nigeria.Thank your Chi that your family took that bold step to know his stand with you and you also took a wise decision by ending it with him. To me, that registry both of you had was a SHAM. Do not change your mind towards him, let him rant as he want, you owe him nothing. File for divorce dear.
ReplyDeletePoster 2, there is nothing wrong with going for a church blessing, until you have a church blessing, you are both committing fornication. please do not discourage your husband from doing the right thing.
Provided her dowry has been paid? They are not committing fornication...
DeleteStella de post my comments so that we no go fight...last warning, lol
ReplyDeleteP2.. You guys can do it in form of ur wedding anniversary, then you take ur vows in a church as it suits you. Many churches allow such. I recently attended a 10yr wedding anniversary, and men it was lavishly celebrated with plenty to eat and drink.. Babe, do what makes you happy so long as you guys can afford it. Celebrate ur selves now that you are alive not wen you die cows and goats will be killed to celebrate....
ReplyDeleteP1... Life goes go dear. You made a mistake, learn from it, dust urself and move on.
Such desperation at just 30. My dear I am 33 and single, and I won't even say pimm with a jobless man. Where have women left their pride.
ReplyDeleteI have been engaged once, to a very rich guy, and it didn't work out, I almost lost my mind as I was even 30 then. I leave people to say what they wish. I have a good job, beautiful and don't play with my appearance. Most men even think I'm younger bcos of my size and dressing.
I am currently dating a 37yr old lawyer, never been married, he even has a doctorate. I am not pushing him desperate for marriage bcos d relationship is young, and we both don't want to make a mistake. Maybe by next year we will get married. Let anybody call me gwegs, but even at my age of 33 I won't marry a jobless man without a degree, living in face me a face you.
I waited for my man, his good looking, ambitious and godly. And yes good men of 35-40 are still in the market. Stop being desperate ladies just because you are 30 and above. Leave people to keep talking, at d end of d day you will be the one in d marriage, either reaping the fruits or dieing in misery.
In my so called gwegs state, I still have my standards, and I won't drop it for no one. Education and career is important to me in a man and I won't settle for anythn less. Age or not.
Poster never in ur life date a guy without a job, I'm not saying look for a ready made rich man. But you are too old to be playing around. Your man must have a job/profitable business, he must be ambitious, you must have common goals, he has a plan and clear definition of what he wants to life. He must be able to adequately provide shelter and basic needs for his family. There are plenty of them around, u need only pray and look.
Give me five
DeleteDats d spirits
Wen u luv ur self more
It goes a long way
Is it not better to be a hapi single qwegs than a miserable married qwegs. Lol
My dear your hubby can be rich today and poor tomorrow,face me I face you doesn't make anyone bad,Caroline danjuma's hubby is living in a mansion yet she is very sad,people build their houses from face me to better house,emphasise the character not the condition because no condition is permanent including yours,you shouldn't be thinking of marriage since you don't care what people say.liars
DeleteNa wa o, poster1, u think marriage is a game? Deal with your trouble.
ReplyDeletePoster2. Nothing wrong in actualizing ur dreams, just make sure u hv the means
Poster one, You are just annoying. "Ctrl shift biko". So that place wey you dey, you no see better black man marry or white guy wey u go use sex turn him brain 360 to put immediate ring for your finger?
ReplyDeleteYou are not clever; sorry about your loss. Life goes on.... Abi na wetin you want make I tell you? Your desperation will still push you to accept him back as you mumusiouly took him back some years ago.
Poster two, Are you trying to be noticed? Even my sister's father-in-law and mother-in-law did church wedding at their old age. Please fix date and announce it for those who wants to come. This is not chronicles biko. Stella, you should have posted it on IHN.
And poster 1 said she is a graduate???!!!...Buahahahahahahahaha...OLODO!!
ReplyDeletelong hiss for the two narratives. No lesson learnt!
ReplyDeletePoster1: bet you said you travelled abroad to study and you type like this? smh
poster2: you better goan cook for your husband and pikin and stop whining for white wedding upandan
Please oo my fellow bvs help a sister oo, can a man become infertility due excess mustabetion?
ReplyDeleteStella abeg much this gbanguan. Choi
DeleteJeeeeeeeezzzz wtf did I jst read??? Otu ocha
DeleteShe should also munch urs too
DeletePoster 1, Delete that man from ur life, don't even mention to anyone you have ever been married. Chaiiii I can't stand poor, uneducated jobless men in my life. How do you even get turned on by a jobless man. Ask a lawyer for advice and he wld advice weda u will do an annulment or quickie divorce. If it means paying off d hungry horsebands. Pls don't tell ppl you ever married, especially to a poor man, don't let ur value drop as a divorcee. Delete him from FB, Instagram, bb all social media and block his no. Even if they ask u, do u know so so person, say you don't know such.
ReplyDeletePoster 2, Who cares? Daisy Danjuma at her old age just did proper wedding with T.Y a while ago. Saw it in ovation few years back. I'm sure it's bcos of properties and assets, so d 1st wife doesn't cum and claim legal wife when he dies. D woman smart die.
Enjoy ur wedding madam, it's done welll.
#1- Just be thanking God that you're free from him. If you remove your mind from marriage that's when it will come so humble yourself and pray.
ReplyDelete#2- To me o, since you've married why not renew your vow by inviting friends and family. With this economy situation you guys wanna waste money, channel it into a business for your kids' future.
Poster one u suffering from low self esteem, what manner of desperation is this. U must b ugly,cause I can't see any reason for this behavior. Even ugly girls get good guys, please work on urself before jumping into anything
ReplyDeletePoster 2 - Maybe you can do something big like travel to a small island and have a nice intimate ceremony with a few people that would be momorable
ReplyDeletePoster 2,
ReplyDeleteThere is nothing wrong with doing your white wedding after a kid. i know someone who has 2 kids in a marriage of 5 yrs and just had his wedding this year( Easter monday) Dont worry about what people say.
Poster 1: divorce his ass sharply and move on na.
ReplyDeletePoster 2: plz have a big wedding jor. Your life, ur wedding. My former neighbour had 6 kids with the last being 5 years old but she had a big wedding.
@ Poster 1, Its amazing these days when you see ladies in their late twenties and early thirties, getting desperate over marriage. My dear, what do you want the ladies in their mid thirties, late thirties etc to do o.
ReplyDeleteThe most important thing is finding the right person. I tell you they don't catch latecomers when it comes to marriage. Mind you when your marriage is beautiful people it will show, when the reverse is the case, it will be evident. You wont be able to hide it.So, why not take your time and get it right to avoid all these stories that touch the heart
Poster 2 I don't think you really want it if not you will not be asking 4 me I will have mine when I am ready. Poster 1 I am shocked you said you are wondering if you did something wrong. Hmm mmmm you should even be thanking God you had no child for him, even deny you married such and go change your phone number and name on social networks. You never suffer that man will show you pepper if u don't find your square root. God had mercy on you you made a stupid mistake the 1st time and you want to repeat it you may not be so lucky the next time.
ReplyDelete@mao akuh, since u hv married? Did I 'seeation' well?
ReplyDeletePOSTER 1:
ReplyDeleteIn BEN MURRAY-BRUCE'S voice, THE FIRST PERSON THAT SHOULD BE PUNISHED IS YOUR ENGLISH TEACHER! How can you claim to study in Europe and still write horrifying English like this? Please help yourself 1st before you help that husband of yours.
Why are ladies so desperate? Whether time is on my side or not, I have promised never to rush into marriage. When my time comes, all the witches and wizards in my villa plus the devil himself can't and won't stop me. Just believe in God and yourself and Patiently tell God to always direct your steps. He's the ultimate!
ReplyDeleteI just need someone to talk to. I think im losing my social skills. People to hang out with, new friends. I'm female, 24. I had a very bad day and I have nobody to talk to. I used to have friends oh, well fake friends. I don't belong to their "working class clique" anymore - slying a sister left, right and centre. It doesn't matter that I sometimes make their annual salary in one or two transactions. In their little minds, im a brokeass living off handouts from daddy - therefore I do not belong.
ReplyDeleteThese days it's soo hard to make friends, I put everyone I meet at arm's length. I used to be a butterfly, I don't know what I am anymore. I need to rediscover.
I went for an interview today, the job pays 50k. From my body language, they could tell I wasn't desperate. No I don't need the money, not even the experience, I just need to interact with people more. A lot of people think I'm proud or feel like i'm too pretty to mingle. But I'm going through so much emotionally, drama from so called friends, ex boyfriend spreading stupid rumours about me, the goat that hasnt even seen the birthmark on my chest let alone sex, people judging me wrongly everytime. The only friends I have are my siblings and cousins and they are thousands of miles away from me. The only time I feel normal is Christmas time when everyone is home.
Before you judge that stuck up pretty girl; the one that seems to have it all together... remember my story. This is not even a tenth of everything im dealing with.
--×××××××--
Poster 1: Am so disappoint at you for still asking if you did the right thing, from all what you narrated, it seems you ain't over this man,abi u no fine ni(LOL) I strongly advice you to move on, focus on how to get a man that will respect you and accept you as you are. You are a woman with a bright future for heavens sake. Look yourself in the mirror and talk to your innerself to get the confidence you need, cus it seems you aint gatt some.Move on and NEVER! EVER!! EVER!!! Look back. You deserve a lot better from what you getting.
ReplyDeletePoster 2: You can actually go ahead with the supposed wedding you and your husby wanna embark on. But can i pry a little? Do you both have a very good investment that will carter for the family after the "BIG WEDDING?" If yes, thumbs up and go have your dream wedding....*winks*
Poster 1, you deserve an e-slap! !!!!! POSTER 2, I had my baby after court marriage due to family issues. We did our White and Traditional wedding 2years after. So chill and have your big wedding.
ReplyDeletePoster 2!yes u can have your church wedding.my parents had theirs after having myself n my immediate sister.I was even their little bride.my dad said he told my mum cos of money issue then,they should just do introduction and court wedding n she agreed .he promised her a church wedding if things got better n yes IT happened.Guess what.my mum's wedoing dress was even the one I converted for my prom.pls suit yourself and be happy.do the church wedding.congrats in advance
ReplyDeleteP1:
ReplyDeletePlease ladies love with your HEAD and not heart! The guy is a gold digger..... 6 years ago, my ex left me to marry someone else, then i was 30....
I didn't let pressure get to me from anyone because I knew what I wanted. Last year I married the most caring man at 35! and I am enjoying marital bliss...
P2:
Please follow your heart if that will make you happy.
Nawa oooooooo @narrative number one babes you sure say you go school and you even did a second degree haba something is missing in your story jaree, it doesn't add up .
ReplyDeleteObserving
ReplyDelete