*Sad sigh*
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE....
THE FATHER YOU NEVER KNEW AND HIS ROLE IN YOUR LIFE.....
I'm an ardent reader of your Blog even though I don't comment most times.
I do not how you do this but please I'd love you to post this on your blog because I need as many advice as I can get.
I grew up without my dad (mum told me he left when I was 8months old). I was told he used to beat her up and she even lost a baby in the process before she had me. I grew up with my mum, she was responsible for my schooling, my feeding, everything about me till she remarried when I was 9 years old. Then I started living with her and her husband.
I never knew my dad or heard anything from him till he contacted me on phone when I was about to gain admission. I was so excited because all my life I had always wanted to meet my dad. My mum allowed me to speak with him anytime he called but she also warned me that he was going to hurt me.
When I gained admission into the Uni, I asked my father for school fees, that was the last time I heard from him then. My mother and step dad paid my school fees till my final year.
I lost my mum in my final year, and my step dad adopted me. My father only called to tell me sorry, he did not even bother to ask me how I was nor did he come to visit me, he knew my mum was the only person I had.
During my service year, I would call him once in a while wanting him to at least care about me enough to want to see me or take care of me, he gave one excuse or the other.
After my service year, I got a job. I applied for Msc and I was accepted in one of the Nigerian Uni. I called my dad to tell him, after that day he stopped picking my calls.
I got engaged during my Msc program, and I fixed my wedding date. I called my father to tell him I was getting married, again he gave different excuses, ranging from me being too young to him telling me that I should bring my husband to meet him and have the wedding in his house. This is a man I have never met, I don't know where he lives, he has never done anything for me. How can I take my fiance to meet that kind of man?! The only father I've ever had and known is my step dad. I ended up not telling him the date of the wedding.
Since I didn't have a job because of my Msc, my step dad and fiancee took care of everything concerning the wedding. My wedding turned out to be a glorious one, thanks to God!
A day to my wedding, my father called me and told me to call off my wedding that if I refused, he was gonna come and ruin my wedding day. He said he would embarrass me and my family! But with a lot of prayer he didn't come!
On my wedding day however, my so called father sent curses and insults through text messages to my phone. It was bad I had to switch off my phone.
Stella, my question now is that did I do anything wrong by going ahead with the wedding? Should I have taken my husband to meet him?
I get bothered by this a lot and I hate it when I offend people but I feel he should be the one to apologize to me!
My father doesn't even believe he did anything wrong, he has not apologized for what he did all these years, he believes I'm the one who offended him! You have no idea what I went through growing up! I don't want pity, I just want your opinions! U know what the bible says about obeying our parents and what not. What about the curses and the insults?
Thank you so much Stella
Hmmmm
ReplyDeleteJoblesshousewife
Your case is a settled one, change your line and don't bother calling him, don't let him know where you live and how you're progressing in life. Even your mum who did all her best to make you someone in life couldn't wait to reap the fruit of her labor (so sad about this RIP to her).
DeleteSo my dear he deserves not to reap where he never labored.
*Prayer Point*: May my mum live to eat all she labored for and another person will not represent my space for my kid. Oluwa jekin jeun omo laye ati laaye idera.
*Larry was here*
Chronicle
DeleteThe first question you should ask yourself is " what gives a man the right to call himself your father?" the wizard your mum got entangled with before she met your stepdad is nothing but a sperm donor. How many dissappointments did u meet with him and you still didnt give yourself brain. You should bless God everyday for your stepdad, he is one of a kind. Your mum really was blessed to meet him.
DeleteAs for your sperm donor father laying curses. Rebuke the devil and cast him from your life.
How sure are you that if you had taken your fiance to meet him he wouldnt have spun tales to make the young man take to his heels.
Never forget to reward your stepdad in the right way because he deserves it. Enjoy your marriage joor.
Send the courses back to him in million folds, delete his number & change ur line!
DeleteImagine the effrontery!
Abeg One Trillion borrow me u catch phrase, i'd return it later...... End Time Sperm Donor.
DeleteThe only reason he is angry u neva brought ur finace home was that was when he wanted to gain from you by taxing him so badly. Please my advice to the young men out there I know caring for a child is neva easy but children are gift from God and gift given by God there is always a way to cater for such gifts, so my advice in case u impregnated any lady whom u ve abandoned the child cause of finance please go look for them if not to care for the mother of ur child at least ur kid because there is always a curse that goes with abandoning ur child if not today definatly in the evening that curse must locate u. I have one living with us by my sis which was abandoned by the dad right from the very first day that child was born. I cried inside of me this morning when going to drop him school he said my daddy will take me to London, I was shocked I looked at him and asked again u said what he repeated same thing and I said Amen out of faith, this child has neva said anythg abt dad before so that was why I was shock hearing him say that. The mum is struggling so hard catering for him alone with no good job, so why I brought in my own short story, I know what this poster actually went through. My dear in ur don't feel guilty God knows u tried drawing close to him but he drew back because he was running from expenses so the step u took by not taking ur finace to him was the right step because the person that trained a child is the parents of that child not the one that only gave birth and abandoned the child by his/her faith. So stay bless and forget about ur dad and focus on ur new home and have in min you've got only one dad which is ur step father. Stay bless.
DeleteBabe, u did the right thing. I don't think I will be wasting my credit on him if I were in ur shoes.
Delete*where my weed at*
Babe, u did the right thing. I don't think I will be wasting my credit on him if I were in ur shoes.
Delete*where my weed at*
Poster, I once had a colleague that was exactly in your shoes. This friend of mine saw hell! Her father left her and her mum, mum later remarried, same with the father. But the mum wanted the children to have some sort of rship with the father, so she decided this colleague of mine stay with her dad. The father threw her out in the middle of the night, burnt her certificates, called her names, beat her up. She had to leave and didn't hear from him for years! He later reached out, it was hard on all of them but they forgave him. Less than 2 months later, he died. My advise to you is that just leave him at arms length, don't reach out, don't curse him, if possible, change your line or block him outrightly. And please move on, find solace in your husband and your new family.
DeleteAll the best.
The Bible that said we should obey our parents also said parents shouldn't make their children angry.ignore him.it is your fault in the first place, Why call a man who runs away from his responsibility to attend your wedding just because his prick helped in producing you.Why inform him about your progress,all in the name of creating a bond, you want to destroy your life?. Better delete his number and forget about him.if you like when you give Birth send him message to come and name your baby all in the name of creating bond.Mtcheeeeew. better make your step pop your popman.bye😀
DeleteDon't worry about any curses. Continue to live ur life in peace. Focus on ur step father, he will be the grandfather to your kids not your biological father. Please don't contact him again, you don't need any validation from him only from your step father and God. I know it's tempting to want to be connected somewhere but God has blessed you with your own family now. Be content with your husband/children/future children. Don't go looking for trouble. Life is simple when we make it so
DeleteThe people that really care for you unconditionally most times are always not related to you by blood..
DeleteLet me tell you a very brief story about someone. Her mother told her that she wasn't going to hear the cry of a baby if she married a particular man. She went on to marry the man and guess what? She heard the cries of babies. If God hasn't said it, it'll never be. As far as you should be concerned, your step dad is your true father.
DeleteYour father is an unrepentant sinner.You don't av to feel bad my dear,he doesn't deserve u carrying him along in Ur life journey.just ignore h please.hes damm annoying. Change your number and any id he knows u with.just ignore him totally.hes an heartless man.it is well with u dear.God be with u and bless Ur marriage. He has failed you as a father but God never fails.The father of the fatherless.
DeleteA father must not be related by blood. I'm still wondering why you were looking for him in the first place.
DeleteForget him jor. His curses means nothing
Well I can understand how u feeling buh Dat man is just a ssperm donor, nt worthy to b called a father.. atleast you are lucky you ve got a good step dad, pls try and look up to him as ur dad... forget the sperm donor of a dad, pls face ur new home and forget about him, he not worth the stress.. his curses are going right back to hit him hard...
DeleteYour dad is angry cuz he missed out on bride price
DeleteYour common sense is telling you what to do but you choose to ignore it
Please stop insulting your step dad and go and bond with him and ask for forgiveness
*curses*
DeleteHis curse can't affect you, your father is the step dad that took care of you. Enjoy your life jare. It's well.
DeleteJust negodu
ReplyDeleteHe was just a 'Sperm Donor'...Our good book in 1 timothy 5:8 also says that a Man that can't take care of his own is worse than an Infidel!!! Change your thought u will be alright
DeleteThat ur father wanna be ur stumbling block!
DeleteLet him face his new family pls.
Babe leave him! He's wallowing in regrets!
For me, all u have done is disrespect the man who raised u and u shld ask him for fotgiveness.
DeleteWhy even struggle to find sm1 who doesnt want u and hasnt even made a single effort? If u were mindin ur biz, will he even know the good things happening to u talk more of placin curses?
Just change ur number and think of how u can love ur step dad.
Am sure u read how hard it is for single mums to get married and more of the men that wouldnt hv anything to do with the wifes kids frm previous marriage? U find 1 that accepted u and ur mum and yet u go look 4 the man that almost killed ur mum and killed ur unborn sibling? Smh...u need evaluation.
Darling where have you been?
DeleteSDK, just so u know, I love this blog to pieces, omg!! I have been laughing all thru and following all your posts from back to back, chai SDK ti take over this 2016, much luv. 'I didn't read the chronicles' byeee.
DeletePoster, your family is not only determined by blood, St least your step father was there for u. Focus on your new family, forgive your real father and put him in prayers. I think for now, u should avoid physical contact.
DeleteGod bless you plenty, Tuscany
Deletetime to read comments.
ReplyDeletePoster, tht ur papa is an end time father.
DeleteHe nids to b castrated.
It's bcos of d motherly values in u tht is why u r trying to show some love n affection.
Ask ramsy Noah wat he did to his papa.... Guy no send am.
If it were a male child, tht man cant do shit.
C wat I always say abt end time men. They r as useless as dirty rag.
Forget abt him completely.
The only tin u can giv him are ur prayers. Shikena!
A biuruful song for that tin u call ur fada***
DeleteOJU OLE REEEEEEE'OLEEEEEEEE!!!!!!
THIEF BARAO BANZA..
He'd get over it.
ReplyDeleteJust go with an uncle or someone related to him and beg him.
He can't ask you to divorce your husband.
Worse he would insult you and send you away.
We all need our parents blessings no matter the situation.
God bless your step father.
He did right by you.
Beg him for what exactly. The father is not fit to be a father and he will continue to weigh her down. He is an evil soul that needs to be cut off. He has never been there for her right from when she was a baby so she should regard him as dead. He doesn't mean well for her and the earlier she cuts him off the earlier she gets her peace. He is not a father. Simply a sperm donor and that is the truth.
DeleteWat parent? Her parent here is her step dad
DeleteUr comment style Don change... Good for you.. Reach out to ur new boo, now that he is in the ocean.
DeleteDid you really mean that? Beg a man that never contributed to her wellfare? A man that never cared if she existed? Poster I blame you for telling him abt ur wedding. Just change ur line. Cikina
DeleteDoppelganger, u took the words from my mouth. Ur father wld always be ur father no matter what happens. If not for him u wldnt be on earth. Your step father was there for u but he can never be your father in actual sense.
DeletePlease try to make peace with your father.
beg him for what???..Her step dad is her dad now..Your parents are those who cater for u....Forget about your real dad...
DeleteMy dear, why should she beg him?For abandoning her and her mother? For not carrying out the duties of a father in her life? Mbanu! She cant beg him. Hell No, My dear poster,You did nothing wrong. That sperm donor is simply lonely n frustrated so just allow him be and go about your life. Remain Blessed
DeleteMy dear, why should she beg him?For abandoning her and her mother? For not carrying out the duties of a father in her life? Mbanu! She cant beg him. Hell No, My dear poster,You did nothing wrong. That sperm donor is simply lonely n frustrated so just allow him be and go about your life. Remain Blessed
DeleteCos you have heard one unknown guy is looking for you na, you have started typing like an idiot( that's a compliment sef)
DeleteTakes more than blood to be related even the Bible says a man who can't tak care of his family is what? Ode
Go where with which uncle? Her real dad is her step dad and not that man that want to reap where he did not sow.
DeleteHis curses can never work on you bcos he's an irresponsible side father
Poster do you know who a father is? Birthing you doesn't make him a father, but caring for you does. Your step dad is your father. I don't see you saying anything bad about him. Your biological dad is a puss, don't bother about him before he carry you go do juju
DeleteThis doppelgänger I doubt if you read the post
DeleteAnon 16:53 to anon 17:21, you go dey alright.
DeleteWa Wa alright shogbo.
Beg for what? Nah! Don't beg, you can forgive.. move on, he isn't needed in your life and he doesn't have the power or authority to curse you. You are already blessed by God, and we all know that who God has blessed....
DeleteDoppelgänger stop smoking too much weed, it is really beginning to affect your brain.
Delete@Doppelganger..God bless u.for those of u who gives negative advice..maybe u don't know that,a father who brought u to this world has a lot to tell abt ur success or failure..if u don't want that curse to affect u,I tink the best thing is,go back to ur father and apologies,let him pray for u that's all..honour ur father and mother..remember the word of thy creator..
DeleteYou can go to the extent of caring for ur father but u must do it with a clean heart which makes it bitter for him whenever he enjoys whatever u give to him..
Mc pinky
Beg him for what Doppelganger???? A father will always be a father lizzy?
DeleteThat is BS! So her stepfather who trained her to school and took care of her and adopted her as his daughter is what then?
Her biological father is just a sperm donor! He wants to benefit from her marriage by asking items from her husband and deprive the man who was there for her his right!
Poster, carry go, nothing go happen! A causeless curse has no harm! BREAK every communication with him! You don't even know where he lives! Please enjoy your marriage and see your step father as the Only father you have.
Doppelganger the hypocrite, Don't worry he will put a ring on it when he comes back from the ocean
DeleteYeye dey worry you.
Your father is your father
ReplyDeleteWeda you like it or not
What do I even know abeg lemme just read comments
If u don't know what to say then don't even comment. How can a sensible person say your father is your father no matter what. A father that didn't even boder to call or check on his child for once, doesn't care if she was alive or not, didn't spend a dime or even try to on her wellbeing and you still think such humans r worthy to be call a father then you joking. Poster don't ever try to go see him or even take your husband with you cause is obvious your father didn't wish well for you. Some men can be so shamless. Now things are fine he wana chop from you.
DeletePardon? The bible says any man who can't take care of his own is and infidel. The bible also says that father's should not provoke there children.
DeleteWhat is the meaning of an infidel? According to the free dictionary: 3. One who doubts or rejects a particular doctrine, system, or principle.
What gives such an unprincipled person the guts to send curses to her? Do you think God is asleep? Do you think heaven isn't watching? If she has issues with her step dad, I advice her to settle. But not with this infidel!!
Sister mi, resend those texts to him. Because the bible says that blessed would be the man that blesses you and cursed will be the man that curses you. Tell him that upon this principle you resend the curses to him. Once you're sure the message has delivered, quickly change you SIM card so he doesn't carry his madness near you. And for your own good stay away from him.
Kilode?!! Your store father has loved and treated you like his own. Now you also have a good husband. So what are you looking for in that useless excuse of a man you call father? Look, my dear, they say we can't choose our family. But let me tell you, this is the 21st century and I tell you you can choose yours. Better choose the man that raised you and not that sorry excuse of a sperm donor. He's a disgrace to mankind. God bless your mothers soul.
May thunder fire that your father...
ReplyDeleteFather for mouth!...abeg ignore him and stay very far away from the idiot!...
You have a father in your step dad and the earlier you stop thinking about that your useless father,the better for you...
This is the truth.
DeletePoster read this! You father is your step dad. Don't cause wahala for yourself
DeleteGbam.
DeleteNeed I say more?
Poster, this comment is all u need.
Madam,so itks ok to curse someone father after calling me different names for calling out someone's mother when he wrote dat he caught his mum cheatin?
DeleteI don't know what she wants again. You have a loving step father and you are complaining. Know when to do away with devilish family members.
DeleteLinda I follow you say "thunder fire the man"!!!You can't eat your cake and have it.Your father is a very wicked n hopeless man.He has no love in him.He behaves like my dad,mine was invited but Neva cared to come or call to apologize.
DeleteGbam...
DeleteMe wey i be old man sef follow you curse your papa...thunderous boko hagoat go strike am die . If ur story real !!!!! Amen
DeleteWhat a bastard thing the man be..
Make i know vex for u o poster
Your saviour is your father
Her step father God bless u till eternity and me tooooooo*****Amen.
Me wey i be old man sef follow you curse your papa...thunderous boko hagoat go strike am die . If ur story real !!!!! Amen
DeleteWhat a bastard thing the man be..
Make i know vex for u o poster
Your saviour is your father
Her step father God bless u till eternity and me tooooooo*****Amen.
Y did u go looking for him in the first place? Ok after you found him and you found out he didn't care for you why did you keep going back? Y did you keep calling? As if you needed his approval to validate yourself. You had and still have your step father so what's your problem??? Y keep looking for the face of a man who didn't care and will never care? You're the one that gave him the right to come and start feeling on top of the world forming father
ReplyDeleteExactly my thought .I had to. even free my father's people and even told my mummy not to call them to anything am doing.
DeleteExactly
DeleteMy dear help me ask her...o, I blame her walahi. You found out he wasn't interested in you but u kept going back. Na u find trouble
DeleteThe poster is annoying..abeg..After everything your step dad did for u..U went looking for your useless father. ...mtcheew...
DeleteExactly...you owe him no apology. Cut every tie with him. If you are important to him should come. Looking for you. face your marriage and don't give him a chance to ruin it. Your step father is the ony father you got.
DeleteThank you for this comment
DeleteIHN! Finally I can browse, glo u guys self.
ReplyDeletePoster 1... ur father na EMU. Dont mind him. His curses is back to sender. Abeg enter better church so that the curse will not have effect on you.
ReplyDeleteyeye father
Move on with your life. Respect your mother of blessed memory, that man will hurt u. It's better u don't meet him than knowing him.
ReplyDeleteSpeak to ur husband about it or better still your step Father.
Sister why r u bothered tho? R u seeing any manifestation of the "curses" he sent to u?
DeleteCos this matter dey too straightforward for chronicle.
Judging by ur reply to my ihn comment,I bet u grew up under an equally irresponsible man..I shake my head for u for thinkin it's only a jobless person dat takes care of his woman.I can imagine d kinda men u r surrounded with
DeleteMy sister you didn't do anything wrong.
ReplyDeleteYour father is a very irresponsible man(sorry to say this).
Men like your father are much in 9ja now waiting for the right time to struck so they can collect bride price.
I'm waiting.
May jesus fix it
ReplyDeleteNo let your step father feel bad oo na dia you for get correct curse from God sef ..
DeleteNo pay dat man with evil oo
diaris God oo !!!like mama pepe dey talk am'Leave dat agbero u call father alone oo ,make e no come adultnap nd rape you oooooabi sell your parts for ritual
I kant shout.
Being a Sperm Donor isn't all it takes to earn the "Father" title.
ReplyDeleteKindly ignore that man and be grateful your stepfather adopted you
Gbam!
DeleteYou didn't do anything wrong. The man who brought u up and cared for you is your father. Love and respect him. As for the irresponsible sperm donor, forget him. His words and curses have no effect in your life. If you like urself and ur future children, do not contact him again.
DeleteExcatly, is not all it takes. He wants you to feel guilty so that he can ruin your life.
DeleteRubbish... The only thing you did was involving him in your life. Clearly He doesnt care about you. Pls move on dear. Enjoy your life with you hubby and dont forget to always appreciate your step dad.
ReplyDeleteLeave matter for mattais Jarey!nothing will happen. Leave your life with your husband in peace.when he didn't sew any seed in your life and is looking to reap Fruit.
ReplyDeleteHello Young girl, that man is not your dad. Your dad is the one that adopted you. After that adoption, you ceased to belong to the "tout' you described. This is legal and scriptural. After we were adopted by Christ, we ceased to belong to "the devil". That's Ephesians one verse five.
ReplyDeleteDon't make the mistake of connecting with or apologizing to that man. Your life will be ruined. Consider him a non existent mistake.
Poster,ur biological dad was only a sperm donor! Ur real dad is ur step dad!
ReplyDeleteYour head dey there
DeleteYour head dey there
DeleteThat man doesn't deserve the title of a father, he only donated his sperm. Never mind about any curses d idiot may have made, as he never was a father to u, such curses will never stand. Return every evil word he spoke against you back to him with prayers and please enjoy your marriage.
ReplyDeleteAbbeg leave him alone jawe
ReplyDeletePut ya marriage before God and enjoy it,he was never there,so to me he will never matter.I blame you for calling him afterall ya step father isn't a bad person..
Poster,please don't get me angry this afternoon, that man is a destroyer, he is not your father,cut every ties with him.
ReplyDeleteUr mum warned u earlier and u still went ahead to be calling him and asking for help,na wah for u oo.
The only man u should recognize as a father is ur step dad.
Ur father is only a wicked sperm donor,stay away from him.
Heartless man!!
Is he a drunk or a mad man.
ReplyDeleteA sperm donor isnt equal to d father.
Pls move on... u hv a father, ur step father focus pls.
Sorry for not having a biological father, he is dead to u
I can feel the pain from your words.
ReplyDeleteY
ou can't but recognize the fact that he is your father.
That been said, the father you know, the one who saw you through everything is your stepdad.But, in my opinion, you should have taken your fiance to see him (your real dad) and whatever action you took about the wedding after that would have been justified.
The bible didn't attach any condition to honouring one's parent. Whether they treat you well or not, whether they pay your fees or not, the bible instructs you to HONOUR them so your days may be long.
The deed has been done, you can call him and apologize for not introducing your man to him, for peace's sake. If after that he acknowledges his wrong doings, fine! If he doesn't, you've done your bit, just move on with your life!
That man can go to hell (pardon me) God bless ur step dad for never taking advantage of u and raising u right, that man is who u owe it all to even after ur mum died.Ur dad is just d donor who brought sperm shikena his curses? curses? Curseless curse shall not stand abi u never hear am bfor? He only wants to be relevant.He knows he's a disgrace and isn't useful to u so , wants to join the league of fathers, when they call father he will jump out. Rubbish and ingredient no fear my dear n fear.
ReplyDeleteAm speechless ooo.All I can say is that you should forget about him and focus on been a good wife and mother to your husband and future children
ReplyDeleteWoW.....deep
ReplyDeleteGirl your mother's husband who adopted you is your bonafide dad according to the laws of Nigeria (suppose that is where you live). If you go to that man, he might rape or kill you or both.
ReplyDeleteMay the Lord bless your mom's soul.
Beware of the "Queen of the coast and bus of this blog" who will tell you like she told the poster yesterday to "poison him". Beware girls of this snakegirl, in this blog.
Be careful.
i wish the hearts of a man would determine his fertility, so if a man has an impure/evil heart.... Even if he goes on a fucking spree, the most fertile woman wldnt even get pregnant while ovulating.
ReplyDeleteI believe being a father transcends beyond providing the sperm for reproduction to take place. That is to say, that a man donated a sperm doesn't make him a father as it involves more than that. My dear your biological father is just a sperm donor and your step dad who has been there for you despite your mum's demise is the man you should recognise as father. Those curses and abuses won't work because he lost the right to call you his daughter several years ago by not being responsible for your welfare and upbringing. So dear, tune up your mindset and ignore his tantrums. As the saying goes, what you believe is what works for you. Don't allow negative thoughts and interpretations be cloud your sense of good judgement and reasoning.
ReplyDeleteI believe being a father transcends beyond providing the sperm for reproduction to take place. That is to say, that a man donated a sperm doesn't make him a father as it involves more than that. My dear your biological father is just a sperm donor and your step dad who has been there for you despite your mum's demise is the man you should recognise as father. Those curses and abuses won't work because he lost the right to call you his daughter several years ago by not being responsible for your welfare and upbringing. So dear, tune up your mindset and ignore his tantrums. As the saying goes, what you believe is what works for you. Don't allow negative thoughts and interpretations be cloud your sense of good judgement and reasoning.
ReplyDeleteI believe being a father transcends beyond providing the sperm for reproduction to take place. That is to say, that a man donated a sperm doesn't make him a father as it involves more than that. My dear your biological father is just a sperm donor and your step dad who has been there for you despite your mum's demise is the man you should recognise as father. Those curses and abuses won't work because he lost the right to call you his daughter several years ago by not being responsible for your welfare and upbringing. So dear, tune up your mindset and ignore his tantrums. As the saying goes, what you believe is what works for you. Don't allow negative thoughts and interpretations be cloud your sense of good judgement and reasoning.
ReplyDeleteD way some pple reason sometyms baffles me! Ur late mum n ur step father dt gave u all they could didn't give u any problem. How come u r allowing ur head to b bothered by a father who has never 4 once bn responsible? Receive sense o. If I were u, I would never av anytn to do wt such a person. I will stop calling him, if he calls, I wouldn't pick. Or better still change ur number cuz to me, dt's d only way he could contact u. Move on wt ur life pls!
ReplyDeleteThe only reason he is angry u neva brought ur finace home was that was when he wanted to gain from you by taxing him so badly. Please my advice to the young men out there I know caring for a child is neva easy but children are gift from God and gift given by God there is always a way to cater for such gifts, so my advice in case u impregnated any lady whom u ve abandoned the child cause of finance please go look for them if not to care for the mother of ur child at least ur kid because there is always a curse that goes with abandoning ur child if not today definatly in the evening that curse must locate u. I have one living with us by my sis which was abandoned by the dad right from the very first day that child was born. I cried inside of me this morning when going to drop him school he said my daddy will take me to London, I was shocked I looked at him and asked again u said what he repeated same thing and I said Amen out of faith, this child has neva said anythg abt dad before so that was why I was shock hearing him say that. The mum is struggling so hard catering for him alone with no good job, so why I brought in my own short story, I know what this poster actually went through. My dear in ur don't feel guilty God knows u tried drawing close to him but he drew back because he was running from expenses so the step u took by not taking ur finace to him was the right step because the person that trained a child is the parents of that child not the one that only gave birth and abandoned the child by his/her faith. So stay bless and forget about ur dad and focus on ur new home and have in min you've got only one dad which is ur step father. Stay bless.
ReplyDeleteDearest poster, I can relate very well with your narrative. You didn't do anything wrong o my dear. You even tried contacting him. I have/ had the same issue as yours, only that each time I called the so called father it was through God's grace. He was invited for my wedding but he insisted I brought my fiancé to see him, I never did! That is his problem. He cannot and can never reap where he didn't sow. My advice, hold on to your step dad because that is your Father , your real father was just a sperm donor ( sorry if you feel hurt). Let me hide my ID
ReplyDeleteMumu poster saying my father! My father. Anyways my own father never cared about me, I jumped from a story building one day when the beating was so much. Never will I forget the day he stripped me naked as a 14year old girl because I came late from an errand and I stood by the corner of the room naked while our busy buddies neighbour came to ask him why I was shouting..They all stared unroll I was able to run out of the room and got some clothes someone wet clothes on the rail. After a while I came back to the house ashamed of what happened to me, meanwhile my mother was abusing me too. Anytime I asked for money she would say ( is that not breast coming out of your chest) go and fend for yourself. When it was time for waec nobody paid for me, I left school at SSS 2 started to look for work but my statue was so small nobody wanted to employ me .They always say I'm too small ,with God a woman that runs a daycare employed me to help to assist her. Now I got a job no clothes , but I was roughing it. After my order salary I went to kantaguwa to buy clothes and I was with her while my father keep borrowing my salary. To cut my long story short now I'm married by his grace I left Nigeria in 2005.But I find it hard to forgive my parent
ReplyDeleteGirl your mother's husband who adopted you is your bonafide dad according to the laws of Nigeria (suppose that is where you live). If you go to that man, he might rape or kill you or both.
ReplyDeleteMay the Lord bless your mom's soul.
Beware of the "Queen of the coast and bus of this blog" who will tell you like she told the poster yesterday to "poison him". Beware girls of this snakegirl, in this blog.
Be careful.
Your step father in the real sense of it is ur father! Ignore that other man abeg! He is of no use to you.. those curses won't stand or come to pass... pray and break it... visit a good Bible believing church for assistance.. You did nothing wrong my dear.
ReplyDeleteHe is truly not ur father, your step dad is.
ReplyDeleteForget about him, he's very irresponsible and evil. I dont understand why you're feeling bad for someone that doesnt even send you.Your stepdad who has been there for you through good and bad times is your dad. Focus on your new home and move on. It doesn't mean you are keeping malice but wisdom is profitable to direct. The Bible also says parents should not provoke their children so its not just for you as a child to be obedient. Forget him
ReplyDeleteYour stepfather is your father. That other man is not your father and will never be. Never ever.
ReplyDeleteYou better move on or he will make a wreck out of your life with his off and on irresponsible character.
XOXO MYSTERY
Sorry but your birth father has an entitlement mentality. Cut him off and love him from far.
ReplyDeleteShikena
my dear sister,
ReplyDeletegone are the days when fathers are defined by the role they play in bringing us into this world. Fathers are more than just the man who impregnated our mothers. They are the shoulders our family lean on and more. The man you talked about is not worth the name "father", He has shown through his ways that he does not want anything to do with you, so i'd advice you ignore him and stop telling him about your plans and intention. however, do not stop praying for him and wishing him all that he wishes himself and more.
Please love and honour your step dad, call him father because his actions and disposition deserves it. Pray he lives long, because for every time you will need a Father, he will stand up for you.
Finally, it is okay to feel bad about your father and his actions, but never let it weigh you down, do not go the way of HATE, you have a blisssful life ahead, let no HATE or BITTERNESS hinder you. None of his evil plans will ever see the light of the day. God will protect you and yours from his evil plans and may his deeds never affect you and your children.
stay blessed and Happy.
My sister you get time. I thought you said uiu needed up not telling him your wedding date. All the same, your step father is your real father. You have NP business whatsoever with that man you *think* is your father. Assume him a dead and forgotten man in your life. Can't you see he is so not into you
ReplyDeleteA father is a male figure which provides protection, structure, moral values, blueprint, vision, and purpose in a family.
ReplyDeleteMy Dear, the only father you have is the one that adopted you, saw you through school and has been part of your life. biko leave that fake ass sperm donor alone and move on with your life.
#thankmelater
Dear poster listen to me, He is not your Dad but a sperm donor. Your step Dad is your real dad.You do not own him a thing sweetheart. You have not done anything wrong. You have your own family now please face them and take care of your step dad because he is your father. That word step is not meant to be there.
ReplyDeleteStop calling him,you have found a father in your step dad
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ReplyDeletePls dear he isn't a father to u!ur step dad who cares for u is ur real dad and only when he places a curse on u b4 it will work! Forget that man who claims he's ur dad! Even hell will reject him. Forget about him pls and focus on ur marriage cos Go's is d only one who can bless
ReplyDeleteFisrt of all, ur step dad is a wonderful man, your dad's curses cant have any effect on u, d bible says the curseless shall not be cursed, pls change ur number and dnt bother about him,he shouldn't know where u stay too, if he has brothers, dday u want to see him,go through them
ReplyDeleteMy dear, you cannot satisfy everyone!
ReplyDeleteClear your conscience,you did nothing wrong.
Avoid this so-called dad like a flea and start your new life with your husband.
No use flogging a dead horse.
Listen to your late mum's advice.
Besides,your step-dad is much of a father than your biological father.
What a SHAMEFUL man. Ta lo ni father werey? Mstchewww
ReplyDeleteI will only thank him for his sperm which led U into this world.
Please regard your step as the true father & adore him for being there for U
May God continue to rest ur mum in peace.
Kindly change ur lines, if possible change ur home address... You have a father in ur step dad that man you call a father is not worthy to be yours dear... Cut him off and live ur life and your step dad maybe offended or disappointed that after everything he did for u, u still went back looking for dat akmapu... Move on dear u ve a dad in ur step father
ReplyDeleteMy dear, you owe him absolutely nothing. D'you hear me clearly?
ReplyDeleteABSOLUTELY NOTHING.
Your 'father' is the one who stood by you all these years, who didn't give up on you. And that, in case you are still confused, is your step dad.
You must be a very nice soul.
I would have deleted that man from my life the moment he walked out the door.
And I'm not someone who looks back.
Ever.
My Dear you did not do anything wrong biko enjoy your marriage and forget your frustrated father.
ReplyDeleteNote that the bible also said, parent should not put their children to anger. You don't have a problem as long as I'm concerned.
i have a son, the father left us when he was just six months old. i cried everynight for almost a year, without support from him and from my relatives, i singlehadedly overworked myself, did all manner of jobs to buy SMA gold for my son, now he is two and he comes to ask me of his dad, suprised!
ReplyDeletei dont know y these kids will grow up and still go look for their father, a father is one that was there for u all the way, not one who sperms you out.
i feel very bad but what can i do, cant abadon my child and take him to his fathers house cos the father has never fought for his custody and has never visited his son, now he is camping some other girl who has given birth to a girl for him.
but my son will pick my fone and tell me i want to talk to daddy.
blood indeed is thicker than water
but thats so not fair
u should embrace ur step dad as ur real father but what do i know?
he who wears the shoes knows where it hurts the most
Please forget that man. What makes him your father? Oh! because he donated his sperm abi? The man you should be calling father with a loving voice is your step-dad. You caused all this I must say, why didn't you forget about him when he cared less all these years about you? Your mum warned you to keep off him but you refused, instead of enjoying your marriage as a newly wed, you're thinking of someone who is not.
ReplyDeleteBetter delete his existence from your life before he complicates it. Lastly, don't pay your step-dad back with this attitude cos I'm sure its this sperm donor of a man that made you write this chronicle (pardon me) which won't make you have time for your 'confirm' dad.
He's your Sperm Donor .....
ReplyDeleteFor your own good, keep very far away from that man you call father. His type will want to ruin your marriage and everything good in your life, don't send chronicles to us about this later o! Change your number, make sure he doesn't know where you live, KEEP AWAY FROM HIM! His curses will have no effect on you because he didn't do right by you and is not recognised both in heaven and on earth as your father. If you like use your own hand to shoot yourself in the knee, na you know!
ReplyDeleteplease my dear live your life to the fullest and forget your father abeg, just be prayerful and see your step dad as your father biko. na every father be father, nonsense
ReplyDeleteBiko that man is not your father...stop sweating it
ReplyDeletePoster, do we have the same dad? Sounds so much like mine. He never did anything for me but thinks he has a say in the way I run my life. My dear, just forget him and take your stepfather as your dad.
ReplyDeleteMY DEAR FORGET THAT MAN
ReplyDeleteYOUR STEP FATHER IS YOUR FATHER
DON'T CALL HIM AGAIN
Your real father is your step dad. Your so called biological father is just a sperm donor, and sperm donors have no say in a child's life.
ReplyDeleteBesides, I think it's time for you to stand up for what you want for your life and what you believe in.
Your real father is your step dad. Your so called biological father is just a sperm donor, and sperm donors have no say in a child's life.
ReplyDeleteBesides, I think it's time for you to stand up for what you want for your life and what you believe in.
"Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. " Honour your father and mother" (this is the first commandment with a promise), "that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land." Ephesians 6:1–2".This is a very sensitive subject. Biblically,he's very much your father! How we treat our parents is very instructive to how our lives play out, their attitude to us is inconsequential (that's for God). We need to be very careful with them and ask God for wisdom on how to deal with them.. I.e we must honour them always(I had a case of my mother leaving me at age 9 months with her mother, I went through hell growing up but I still have to do right by her as a child,tough at times but it has to be done so that I can live to fulfil my destiny). Your step father is awesome and may God bless him. As for your father,let God judge him but you have to play your part as a child,if you are a Christian,speak to your pastor about it and also set time aside to seek the face of God on this issue. I pray for God's wisdom and peace for you. Pardon my epistle.
ReplyDeletePlease stop translating the scriptures wrongfully to feed her sentiments! It is the same bible that says parents should not provoke their children! Her attitude is disrespectful to her stepfather. The way she goes about my father, my father, is the reason most men don't want to train another man's child! Poster, your biological father is a greedy man with the entitlement mentality.FORGET about him!
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ReplyDeleteHe is not her father abeg. Sperm donor is not a father.
DeletePoster, he was just a donor and not ur father. Pay no heed to his threats, notin will happen bcos he dosnt hav thay spiritual backup to place an undeserved curse on u! Flee from that man nd change ur number if u dnt hav the liver to shred him verbally! The only person u need his blessing is ur step father and not the infidel dt donated one sperm!.
ReplyDeleteHe's not your father, he never was and he'll never be. He's just a sperm donor.
ReplyDeleteYour father is the Man who was there for you, this man never was. He can fuck right off. Forget the old fucker and move on with your life and the people who love you.
Lord help me never to be a deadbeat.
Something close to this hapn to my frnd, her biological father ask her to come to another state were u know nobody for her wedding, and most get married in his own religion,she cried prayed and fast for day later ignore him.Today she is happily married with kids.eni tin wafa wonfo,u alrdy hav a father u just choose to look for job by ur self.
ReplyDeleteFirst off,I understand your feel of wanting to have had a relationship with your biological father, it's a natural thing for you to have felt. However, since he has never cared to cater to your needs or know you, what your mom said is what you need to heed to. Keep away from him. As for his curses, it won't harm you. Rebuke them. Who is he to curse you when God has not finished dealing with him for abandoning you. Girl, keep calm and be happy and feel peace. Do NOT communicate with him ever again. The day he dies, also tell him sorry for his loss ( Lol!). Don't sweat him. Block his number. Shalom!
ReplyDeleteUr step dad,jst like mine is ur real dad. Forgt dat trash... Nd pls stop dis mumu behavior or sulkin nd grow d fuck up. Dis isssue is nt rocket science... Ur nt blins or dumb.... R u?
ReplyDeleteDear poster, kindly severe any form of communication with that sperm donor you call your father. He isn't. Your father and your Dad is your step-dad who adopted you, labored and spent to send you to school and even did your wedding for you. Staying in touch with such a useless man endangers your life, your hubby and even your children.
ReplyDeleteAnd common, put yourself in your step-dad shoes, will you be happy to see an adopted child of yours trying to give the honor you deserve to one irresponsible man she called her father???
Pls don't be ungrateful. God bless you.
Ur step dad,jst like mine is ur real dad. Forgt dat trash... Nd pls stop dis mumu behavior or sulkin nd grow d fuck up. Dis isssue is nt rocket science... Ur nt blins or dumb.... R u?
ReplyDeleteUr step dad,jst like mine is ur real dad. Forgt dat trash... Nd pls stop dis mumu behavior or sulkin nd grow d fuck up. Dis isssue is nt rocket science... Ur nt blins or dumb.... R u?
ReplyDelete2) God bless your step dad too. He is the one you need to bother about in being a daughter to. Make sure to appreciate him whenever you always can. Let ur spouse be your companion and feel that void in you. Your biological sperm donor is dead. Literally!
ReplyDeleteRemember your mom told you he would hurt you. Be careful,she knows him more than you do.
ReplyDeleteHe might try to let you see reasons why you should not be married by going all fetish on you.
Talk to him on the phone if you want,but do not let him get close to you or your hubby.
Leave him to God. If he really cared about you. He should have made an effort to reach out to you and then meet with your Daddy(the one that was there for you)before the wedding to work out the logistics and other things.
If he did not have 5naira to give you during your growing days,there are ways you show care to your child which is even better than money.
So tempted to call him an efulefu,but I won't.
Above all,never turn your back on that man that raised you. He is a good man.
.
Any man that can't provide for his family is worse than an infidel. Babe ignore that infidel
ReplyDeleteMy dear,just ignore him. I feel your pains because I have been in this shoes but the opposite.. I know what it feels like to want one of the parents so badly and they are always not there..even if they finally show up,your day will be ruined at the end of the day... just let him be and try not to contact him again. God who has seen the end from the beginning will always cause you to prosper and grow beyond your imagination.. concentrate on your new family(hubby) and your step-father.God bless your step father..He's a man and a father indeed...Stay blessed.
ReplyDeleteKeep very very very very very far away from that Psychopath
ReplyDeleteHello Poster. We have these type of fathers every where. Believe me you have not done anything wrong. It was good you reached out to him when you did but he never took up any responsibilities regarding your education, upkeep etc. DON'T, i repeat DON'T let his curses and insult bother you, those words would not hold waters. A father can only compel or enforce matters on a child he was responsible for which he never did. if you take a survey in Nigeria we have over 70% of homes being run and managed by the mother, our mothers are the breadwinners and they do these and the man/husband takes credit for this. Please move on and pray, love your husband and take good care of your step father. he is the real father you deserve and not just a sperm donor.
ReplyDeleteMy dear please 4get dat man, he's not worthy to be called a father, his curses can never work against u bcos he has never laboured one bit 4 u.if u had turned out to be a useless person would he be proud to be ur dad?
ReplyDeleteWhat more do you want from a father that your adopted father hasn't or wouldn't do??i got really upset when I kept reading you were always calling him to know your next steps in life..he doesn't care about you,yet you wanna kill yourself over him...abegii,nothing will happen to you,i say back to sender on your behalf..forget about that your useless imaginary father,don't be an ingrate to your adopted father...be the best daughter to him as he has done his best for you..now I remove that title "step and adopted father" and crown him the REAL FATHER....now forget that sperm donor.
ReplyDeleteChange your phone number after you have downloaded the numbers of people that matter to you. He is dead as far as you are concerned. Stop contacting him and throw away the old SIM card. Your real father, is the one that adopted you. End of story please. Enough already.
ReplyDeleteA Father is someone who has taken it upon them self to play
ReplyDeletean active role in your life.it doesnt necessarily have to be one
Biological father (especially if he chose to be away).
Please disregard him and appreciate the man who has played that
role in your life (Stepfather).
I will advice you even change your number and permanently delete his no.
Take it like you have lost him ,just as your late mum
He is not your father. He is just a stranger who donates sperm to your mother. So nothing can touch you. In fact you should stay far away from him. Because this is when people come to reap fruits they didn't labour for. Rubbish.
ReplyDeleteAnd if your step dad curses you, you better be afraid. So do what is right by him and stop chasing this no good upandan
ReplyDeleteAbeg dat hediot should be good riddance to bad rubbish..father ko popsie ni
ReplyDeletePlease can u send me this ur father's number? Biko the animal needs to hear some things from me. By all means obey the bible and respect him so ur days will be long on earth, but he's not my father so I can tell him what u can't, ok? Ok bye
ReplyDeleteYou honored your father (your step father), your bio father was just there for show. He has not changed and he is still very abusive. You have not been a father but you want to reap benefits. Your real father has played his part. Stop searching for love with a man who will hurt you. Your mother was not a fool to tell you to be careful.
ReplyDeleteThe bible says the curse curseless shall not stand so my dear,do not fret or worry. He is a sperm donor and not your dad. Your dad was the one who took care of you from when you were little till date. May God bless him for you. May he live long to eat the fruit of his labour. When I was reading through your chronicle,i got scared thinking you may want to write that your step dad raped or molested you but he didn't instead he paid your tuition fees and sponsored your wedding. His actions shows clearly that you shouldn't bother to even think of another person other than him as your dad.
ReplyDeleteAs for your biological fathers curses, it won't stand neither will his threat hold water because there is no enchantment or divination against you.
Enjoy your marriage my dear and never pick or call him ever again. If he persists in calling you,you better change your line. I wish you all the best dear.
Throw away dat sim buy anoda one ND Neva call him again . Very simple
ReplyDeleteMy dear move on with your life.My story is similar to yours.I grew up not knowing who my father nor my was.I leaved with a heartless aunty till I ran away to see myself through school.The moment I was called to bar and got a job,mother,sisters and brothers appeared form nowhere
ReplyDeleteDon't expect an apology because you may not get one. Be civil and don't trade insults even though it may be hard. And don't feel guilty too. He did you a favour by staying away who knows how you may have fared if he didn't. Count yourself lucky, you have a father and a dad in your step dad. In my opinion your biological dad is interested in the monetary benefit your birth affords him. Glad you skipped that blow. You don't need him. Live your life. Focus on being the best wife and daughter to your husband and step dad. And work on not needing validation from your biological dad cos trust me if you do it may scar you. Above all take it to God in prayer.
ReplyDeletePoster, delete his number and block him. Better yet, change your phone no. Take care of your step father, that man deserves it. As for your sperm donor, forget about him, do not even go for his funeral. Let whoever he has spent all these years with bury him. Forgive him in your heart and move on without him. He is a stranger. Experience has taught me that people like him are miserable and worthless. If you open your self to him, he will ruin your marriage,he will dupe your husband and in-laws. He will tell your in-laws your mother was a whore. I have seen this play out too many times with bitter estranged "family members". If you open yourself to this man, you will regret it, he will bring calamity to your life and turn it upside down.
ReplyDeleteFor him to curse you on your wedding day, a man that has never met you speaks to his character and he will do worse when you meet. You owe him nothing.
He was not a father to you, his blessings you do not need.
Chronicle sender you are an ungrateful person, I would never want to do you a favor in life. So after all your step-dad has done for you, you keep running after the wizard you call a biological father. Don't worry, you will soon see what you are looking for outside and I pray you don't regret it!
ReplyDeletehe is your biological father. your step dad is your real father.
ReplyDeletei advice is change your phone no and move on cuz that man is yet to really hurt you
Yr father will come up with money issue, shine eyes
ReplyDelete